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Depressed Hamsters Help Researchers
Ant wrote to mention an ABC News article indicating that hampsters feel the same effects during the winter months as humans do. Known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D.), winter-related depression affects up to 20 percent of Americans. From the article: "For example, if the animals spend more time hovering near the walls of their containers, rather than at the center, it's believed they feel more anxious. If they decline to slurp up tempting offers of sugar water, scientists take it as a sign of depression. Another test involves placing the animals in water and seeing if they swim or simply give up and float. Hamsters don't sink apparently, but float in water. 'The sooner they give up in the water, the more depressed they are,' Pyter said. 'If you give them an antidepressant they don't give up as quickly.'"
There is no "P". Dear god. After all those years of that fucking hampsterdance crap, people would've learnt that that's the wrong way to spell it.
If they decline to slurp up tempting offers of sugar water, scientists take it as a sign of depression.
The depression diet plan? Someone could make a fortune out of the book rights.
To summarise the summary of the summary: people are a problem. ~ h2g2
Hamsters don't sink apparently, but float in water.
These are some exciting results!
You learn something new every day. With results like these, how far away can self-replicating autonomous nanobots be?
Karma: Chameleon (comes and goes)
Exercise? Eat well? Get away? This article has no purpose to insult us geeks. But I did leave the best for last:
Those russian hamsters are absolutely adorable - IMO one of the best pets. I have two Roborovskii russian hamsters and they are the best hamsters we've ever had. They never bite and are so amazingly playful.
e =ISO-8859-1&hl=en&btnG=Search+Images
http://images.google.co.uk/images?q=roborovskii&i
The only problem with all these studies with species that can't communicate is that there's more than one explanation for observed behaviour. But one always appears to attach an explanation that supports what one wants to find. How do you know that a hamster hovering near the walls is feeling anxiety? Or not drinking the water is depression?
WTF is a hampster?
Everytime you look at porn a devil gets their horns.
Assuming that other critters feel emotions the same way we do is foolish.
For instance, one of the symptoms of depression is sleeping too much. Based on that, we can conclude that bears suffer from extreme depression during the winter. After all, they do nothing but sleep.
Thats all well and good but did anyone stop to ask the hamster's how _they_ felt about it?
"WTF is a hampster?"
You throw a dirty hamster into one of those.
"Another test involves placing the animals in water and seeing if they swim or simply give up and float. Hamsters don't sink apparently, but float in water."
That's not the test to see if a hamster is depressed, it's the test to see if the hamster is a witch.
Let's see... cage up some hamsters, deprive them of natural light, natural surroundings, and buddies, give them an artificial sucrose-laden diet, see how they get depressed, give them drugs to make them happy?
And then suggest that these results could apply to people? Brave New World, anyone?
Drugs. will. not. fix. you.
Get out of your cage, get into the open, make better relationships, find a job that respects you, stop moving home every couple of years, start talking to your family not shouting at them, eat decent food instead of that sugar-laden "lo-fat" junk you're stuffing your face with, stop watching TV, cut down on the booze, and the religion, and for baby jesus' sake, stop taking artificial drugs.
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if their entire lives weren't just a science experiment
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
What also floats in water?
Wood!
And
So, why do witches burn?
[pause]
B--... 'cause they're made of wood...?
A witch! A witch! A witch! We've got a witch! A witch!
Burn her! Burn!
According to current theories most people who suffer from SAD do so because they don't respond to artifical light as if it were natural light (so producing higher levels or melatonine). Which you would of course know had you read the article.
People today aren't any happier. Gayer, maybe
Talk about going to the place where the light never shine
But yeah the study does kind of suck. Could it be possible the hamster is depressed about constantly being dropped in a bucket? Would depress me.
MMO Quests are like orgasms:
You may solo them, I prefer them in a group.
A depressed hamster is suffering from a condition known as SAD? Shoot him full of speed and throw him in the river and he makes like a furry outboard engine?
I nominate thhe discoverers of these critical scientific facts for an award.....
Another test involves placing the animals in water and seeing if they swim or simply give up and float.
Wait... I think I'm working for these guys...
I must be a Hampster... Hamster... Hempster???
Place nail here >+
strangely that's what i read at first...
Isn't this old news? And it so makes me remember the depressed hampsters from the early 1990s.
I can easily see that being relatively sedentary in the winter cuold be advantageous from a survival standpoint. Who says you have to be perky all the time?
-jcr
The only title of honor that a tyrant can grant is "Enemy of the State."
I am the only one sick of trite/simplistic criticisms of scientific studies based on mainstream news articles? Maybe try to read between the lines rather than attack something based on what is most likely a simplification or omission for the sake of a mainstream audience.
What makes a perfectly insightful and polite post get marked a troll while another containing racist, homophobic claptrap get modded up?
What makes an earlier post by a less popular person get modded redundant while an exact copy of it which appears much later makes it to +5?
Why are so many of the most interesting posts by Anonymous Cowards?
By what twisted psychology is anonimity considered cowardly and punished by a low starting score anyway?
(especially considering the majority of the slashdot audience so vigorously defend rights to anonimity)
Why are stories often obviously paraphrased in such a way as to incite paranoid and reactionary comments?
Who the hell are the GNAA and why don't those posts simply get deleted?
What frightening form of obsessive compulsive disorder compels otherwise intelligent people to make 'first post' by spouting any crap that comes into their head without even reading the article?
Someone should do a serious study of the hivemind phenomena and maybe we might learn something useful. As for depressed hamsters? Roll em in tape and fuckem is what I say.
slightly cynical/depressed mood today
"Hamster psychiatry is a pseudoscience," Tom Criuse told host Matt Lauer, later saying: "You don't know the history of rodent psychiatry. I do."
:-P
Sorry, couldn't help it. I haven't taken my vitamins today.
Adolfo
No I was talking about that fact that people in the old days got very little light in the form candles during the long winter nights.
...aren't hamsters nocturnal creatures? I'm confused.
Geez, I thought the mice were running everything... now the hamsters are getting into the act!
The revolution will NOT be televised.
I, for one, welcome our new depressed overlords.
Americans (meaning USians) don't even live that far north (with the exception of Alaskians).
Up here at the 59th parallel (Stockholm) we're used to darkness!
Now I got depressed.
To compensate for the darker days, I keep my present freind Franklin the Hamster under a lamp all the time except when I sleep (he's by my bed) and is definitely seems to be keeping him "up."
Favorite treats are eggs and flower petals.
I'm sure the hamster would go on paddling and thrashing in the water
if they applied electrical current to the poor animal. However, I am
sure after a day or two of this treatment they would have one seriously
depressed animal on their hands. The way I see it the water test is
worth shit.
Hamsters are not rats and they are as I know sulky creatures
to begin with and loners at heart meaning they don't have a lot of social
interaction with their fellow hamsters aside from mating and killing each
other off for territory. Maybe it is well enough that they do this kind of
sensory deprivation experimentation with hamsters and not rats but you know it
might be I come of sounding like a hypocrite but some of the behavorial science
experiments on animals really upsets me and at the same time I do cancer research.
The way I see it however, most mammals need an environment and peers to interact
with, same species and human and if they don't get it they like every other
mammal just shrivel up and die. To top things off, the same kind of people doing
the research on hamsters compared the brain wave of prisoners in solitary confinement
on the day the prisoner entered the prison and three weeks after. I read all told there
was a tremendous reduction of overall cerebral activity.
Okay... I'll close before I start a rant on what a scummy low-life species Homo Sapiens
Sapiens is.
Rosenthal is hopeful that studies, like those with the hamsters at OSU, may help yield more effective drugs for those most affected by SAD...
It it about developing "more effective drugs". These studies are sponsored by drugs companies.
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From the observed behavior, it sounds like some hamsters are just more intelligent than others.
1) the smart ones are near the edge, trying to observe the outside and formulate an escape plan.
2) they don't waste energy struggling in the water when they can just float
3) they don't drink the CoolAid.
Of course, just like in a nursing home, the guards force "antidepressants" on the inmates to melt their brains and make them more docile and manageable.
Why do witches burn?
Because their made of wood?
That's right! Now, what else may you do with wood?
Build a bridge!
Yes, but could you not also build a bridge out of stone?
Hmm... good point.
Tell me: does wood sink in water?
No! It floats!
Tell me... what else floats, apart from wood?
A hamster?
Correct!
So, logically, if she weighs the same as a hamster... she's made of wood...? And therefore... a witch? A witch! Burn her, burn her!
still no cure for cancer
Whether or not this is true, I know I'd pay good money for an mpg of that. (how much Xanax does it require to get a hamster to hover?)
Am I part of the core demographic for Swedish Fish?
It's obvious from the headline that the researchers are just looking for a cute, cuddly way of curing their SADness...
It's Seasonal Attitude Disorder. Attitude. Not Affective.
Depressed hamsters? What next, depressed cubics?
Hamsters are nocturnal and primarily found in the desert, which gets quite cold at night. By all rights, shouldn't they be more active come wintertime?
When I am king, you will be first against the wall
With your opinion which is of no consequence at all
Researchers also discovered that cats, when used as outboard engines, suffer from a syndrome called Mental-Aggressive Disorder. Strapped to a skateboard and pushed down a ramp, they exhibit signs of Rushing Adrenaline Disease. Those who survived were found to be capable of making pictures with Computer Aided Drafting, even though the structures they drew were Beyond Average Disasters.
Acronyms like this cause my Perverse Aversion to Internet News on Science. That's why I read Slashdot.
Don't use the Troll mod just because you disagree with me.
What depresses me is Greenwich Mean Time - if the UK could have Central European Time it wouldn't be going dark as I write this (3.45pm). I don't mind if it's dark until 9am; I go to work in the dark as it is and at weekends I'm probably not outdoors at that time. Apparently the Scots (being closer to the Arctic Circle) don't like the idea because their mere 5 hours of daylight would be at the wrong time, or something.
When I am king, you will be first against the wall.
Mammals do have fully functional limbic systems (the part of the brain that is largely responsible for emotions). So it isn't just an assumption, there is solid neurological evidence that mammals do, in fact feel emotions.
There is also behavioral evidence far beyond that discussed in this article.
However, I will agree that assuming they feel their emotions "exactly as we do" is dangerous. It is likely that their emotional spectrum is different than ours, especially given the differences in our social behaviors. However, there is sufficient evidence to conclude that the fundamental emotions are present and experienced similarly.
... are you talking about?
You put me in a bucket of water. Oh, that's nice. You could have at least made it warm water, but no. Oh, what's the point? I suppose I'll just lay here and drown. Hope that will make you feel good, drowning a poor hamster. Even if you pull me out of the bucket all I have to look forward to is running in a stupid wheel. I run and run and run but never get anywhere. And all I ever get to eat are pellets and water. Boy, there's a five star menu. It's all so pointless....
That's our life, the big wheel of shit. - The Fat Man, Blue Tango Salvage
...hamsters help depressed researchers? :(
Prescriptive grammar:linguistics
My only thought is, "Depressed Hamster Behavior" would be a good name for a band.
The Russians have won. They have made the world a cesspool of distrust, greed, fear and hate.
Just like if lack of hot dogs leads to depression, you would think that eating hot dogs everyday would make people happy!
I always thought the term was invented to rationalize associating fried chicken, grits, chitlins and watermelons with black people who've never been to the south (where such foods are common to all except chitlins)--in other words, a liberal term, like multiculturality, which disguises a fundamental hypocrisy.
Note: I am a progressive and not a part of the liberal-conservative axis.
I ran over a Hamster once. It was very depressed...
"Drugs. will. not. fix. you."
It's unwise to rely on them exclusively, but drugs can help quite a bit with depression.
I rarely criticize things I don't care about.
First, the rate of usage is about 100 per 1000 people, in the US.
Second, anti-depressants do not prevent suicide and in some cases appear to even increase suicide rates.
Third, anti-depressants are a major money earner for drugs companies, who continously need to develop new drugs as older ones become commoditized.
That is what this study is about... setting the stage for new anti-SAD drugs. This is big pharma marketing.
What's the point here? Perhaps that a huge majority of people who take anti-depressants are actually being abused. I hardly think this is a radical statement: it's just valium all over again.
For many people, their drug is their problem.
My list of cures basically comes down to "get a life" and although I've every faith that drugs can solve some problems, they should be the last solution, not the first.
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So what's the point exactly ? "Buy more drugs and be a happy productive citizen" ?
OK I'm not being fair. The article also recommends light therapy.
In other news: People with their monitor set at full brightness found less susceptible to Seasonal Affective Disorder.
AC
Your participation in our experiment is greatly appreciated.
This MUST be why my hamster Huego never did anything but sit in his room all day watching T.V. and eating twinkies. I always knew he was S.A.D but no one would believe me....
THE SUN, IT BUUURNS!
:)
Seriously though, I am more likely to be depressed on days when it is sunny out. Overcast skies / rain brighten me up.
I call it Reverse SAD.
Need help treating your acne? Come here!
I wonder where bunnies fit on the health plan?
Nothing is inexplicable; only unexplained -Tom Baker, Doctor Who
Someone call Letterman.
I don't think I'm gonna do it Hamster Style anymore.
It's true no man is an island, but if you take a bunch of dead guys and tie 'em together, they make a good raft.
Hamsters don't sink apparently, but float in water.
They float in water? Hmm.... What else floats?
Ducks.
And what weighs the same as a duck?
A witch.
And what do you do with witches?
Burn them, of course.
And what else do you burn aside from witches?
More Witches!
Yes, yes, but aside from witches. What else do you burn?
Wood?
Yes! And what do you do with wood aside from burning it?
Build bridges out of it, of course.
And there you go. Irrefutible proof that hamsters can be used as cheap, self reproducing construction material. Just think of the possibilities!
??????
Profit!
I am picturing a hamster running on its little exercise wheel just stopping and thinking to itself "Oh what's the use? It seems like I run and I run and I run but I never seem to get anywhere."
Liberals call everyone Nazis yet they are the closest thing to it.
Hamsters don't sink apparently, but float in water.
i was just about to patent my new technology of unsinkable battle ships made out of hamsters.
just add 2 scoops of ice cream and a banana!
Now that's just good science. In my youth, I seem to remember my brother and I performing a similar experiment on our neighbor's cat and their swimming pool.
SEO Firefox Extension
What's the statute of limitations on cruelty to animals?
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Can I do research on how the fruit flies in my room are depressed whenever I seal up the garbage bag and remove it?
Or when I hit them with bug spray?
Or how depressed they make ME feel?
Richard Steven Hack - This sig is TOO GODDAMN SHORT TO DO ANYTHING USEFUL WITH! MORONS!
I thought you were talking about Ubuntu release names. Or Ang Lee films at least.
Backups are for wimps. Real men post their data in comments and have slashdot mirror it
I thought that in Soviet Russia, scientists would help depressed hamsters.
.. paranoid crackpot leftover from the days of Amiga.
So I'm guessing these depressed hamsters are being used in testing black lipstick and black eyeliner? Allergies from pewter ankh necklaces? Tolerance to high decibel levels of Joy Division? What?
Slashdot requires you to wait longer between hitting 'reply' and submitting a comment.
When your a 4 inch long rodent, and winter comes along, wouldn't reducing your activity level be good? After the 4th or 5th time the critter is tossed in the bucket, don't you think learning has occurred and the little guy knows he is not going to get anywhere by thrashing about?
Bad Science at it's Best!
The real problem is the adversarial concept of medicine.
Depression is always viewed in a negative light.
This is wrong.
Depression is useful.
Depression of activity serves an evolutionary survival purpose.
In a social group of animals, if everyone in the group slows down quite a bit in the winter,
the stored food and remaining food supply will stretch out till the spring.
If everyone is up running about, more individuals will starve,
so Winter acts as a bottleneck,
allowing for the 'depressed' animals to survive, and breed in the next season.
Willy-nilly highly active types starve themselves out of the population, genetic combination pattern deleted. The Law of Natural Selection has been enforced.
Pain feels bad too, but without pain sensing nerves, you'll snap off your own fingers and not care about it. A military man once said: 'Pain is good, it tells you that you're still alive!'
What if,
instead of trying to Drug-Out or Run Away from depression,
people faced it and while sitting still,
meditated upon their thoughts and life situation?
Perhaps in the stillness of not-doing, they can focus on true-being.
Then they will find a new path that will bring greater success and happiness.
If people are living in a bad situation, the Should feel sad about their circumstances.
If they Don't feel sad about bad circumstances,
then they can not tell right from wrong,
and that is a definition of insanity.
Learning from low points in life help teach you how to endure and enjoy the better parts of life and succeed in living.
how much Xanax does it require to get a hamster to hover?
From your point of view, or the hamster's?
Absolutely ridiculous, as if the only variable in a hamster's rationale is depression.. who's to say that the hamsters don't stop strugging because they realise that they're floating? This "test" and it's results could just as easily(and just as ridiculously) be used to "illustrate" hamster intelligence. Still, I can't help but chuckle at the thought of credential-touting scientists dropping hamsters into buckets of water and then analysing them on an emotional level...let's think about how that will be reflected upon in future history books.
Ideally I would need one to mature every week or so, for my python...
it's a blue bright blue Saturday hey hey
And I agree with you, Sir. Further, I feel that we need to study what happens when a hamster drops a scientist into a bucket of water. Balance is a requisite, Sir, for the history books. Also, for complete coverage, the comments and thoughts of the scientist could be recorded on some long-lasting medium. Graven in stone, perhaps.
How many beans make five, anyhow ?