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SPECIAL BIRTHDAY REPORT!!! HEMOS IS 30 :) :) :)
Jeff "Hemos" Bates, who you all know and love here on Slashdot, celebrated his 30th Birthday last Monday. The only way to properly celebrate would be to send him belated e-congratulations to hemos at slashdot.org. Show the love. He'd do it for you. No I'm not kidding.
Show the love. He'd do it for you. No I'm not kidding.
With this new "OMG!!! Ponies!!!" layout I'm afraid of Hemos showing me anything...
Distributed proteome folding @ WorldCommunityGrid.org
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A little early don't ya think? Apr 1 is tomorrow.
/* oops I accidentally made a comment, sorry */
They said "broader appeal". Now I understand.
$ while true; do
> mail -s "HAPPY BIRFDAY HEMUS!!!!!" hemos@slashdot.org done
Causation can cause correlation
Is slashdotting an inbox really a good idea?
"The use-mention distinction" is not "enforced here."
"Show the love. He'd do it for you. No I'm not kidding."
So what's he getting me this year?
are pointless
yep
Um, no. Don't know him, don't love him, and I only show my "love" to the Ponies!!!
There. Fixed.
Pr0n does have strange effects on society.
Hemos award in which he was the only person qualified to win. http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=00/01/03/085424 7
Ooo man the floppy drive is broken. No wait. The computer is just upside down.
If it weren't for your Firefox Extension, I'd be clawing my eyeballs out ;)
Hey, why the strange email format? Hemos email is hemos@slashdot.org . Let's write it correctly so that our friends from the spiced pork and meat front can join in with the congratulatory messages! :-)
10 print "Happy Birthday To You" 20 print "Happy Birthday To You" 30 print "Happy Birthday To You, Dear HEMOS" 40 Goto 10
May the force be with you.
Happy Birthday Hemos!! Hope you have a good year.
I just turned 30 back in February. Really, its not as bad as people will make you think.
Actually, I was born on the day Bill Gates wrote the letter to the Homebrew Computer Club. I wonder if anyone here was born on April 1st, 1976 (day Apple was founded)
...then happy freakin' birthday, young whippersnapper! Buy that man a beer or six! In fact, make it a case of barleywine! Woo-hoo!
[ insert your own witty .sig here ]
...hit Refresh and my eyes are blown out. I'm suing.
The meme police, They live inside of my head
hemos@slashdot.org
^
so he gets more spam
SPAM ME PLZ NOW!!!!
"Happy birthday dude!!! We're gonna /. your inbox!!"
OMG, ponies!
H4pPy B3Rthd4Y H0M05!!!
Hehehh.. Read the description. Taco said Hemos celebrated his birthday last Monday. Get it. He is making fun of the fact that stories usually get posted a week later and people complain about it. Perhaps though I am reading to much into it.
Ooo man the floppy drive is broken. No wait. The computer is just upside down.
heres thinkin flowers for you since we went pink. amazing i didn't know till now that 98.3% of us were guys.
To celebrate the birthday, I'm sure he'd appreciate getting
his email address on some special mailing lists too..
Brokeback Mountain Fan Club?
Care Bears members club?
c'mon, I'm sure I'm missing a few here..
YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!!11111one HAPPY BIRTHDAYS!! xoxoxox
Beauty is just a light switch away.
Unccl oveguqnl, Urzbf! V ubcr lbh svaq vg svggvat gung V pbatenghyngr
lbhe guvegl lrnef ol rapbqvat guvf va ebg-guvegrr... re... arire zvaq.
"Trust me - I know what I'm doing."
- Sledge Hammer
Operation Get Hemos A Girlfriend.
Ooo man the floppy drive is broken. No wait. The computer is just upside down.
... it's only if he starts developing a hankering for Broadway showtunes that you might be in some trouble...
Dog is my co-pilot.
While you are just joining the 30 something club, others of us, namely me, are about to exit it in a few years. :)
Anyhoo, happy Bday! (belated)
Trae
geeky stuff I'm proud to have been a part of: linux.com / themes.org / sourceforge.net / sicnus.com
Happy BDay, and thanks for inventing the best way to kill time for geeks.
Hey man... Remember that time when we went to Amsterdam and picked up that hooker, but she really wasn't a hooker? She sure fucked like a hooker... And floated just like a hooker, after we suffocated her with your Rick Steeves fanny pack and dropped her fuck-battered corpse into the Amstel!!! GOOD TIMES MAN! LET'S DO IT AGAIN!
hello dear sirs my name is jamesh i are india (bihar) can u guide me install red had linux 9?
Happy Birthday, Hemos! If you ever find yourself in Brooklyn, email me for free beer. This offer only applies to Hemos, not all of slashdot. :)
Let's get drunk and delete production data!
What?!? 32 comments and no jokes saying that now that he's 30[0] he can no longer be called Master Bates? DID EVERYONE ELSE IN SLASHDOT GROW UP TOO?
;)
Sheesh people..
[0] Dict entry 5 from the 1913 Websters for those without context.
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!11! HEmoS U cuTiE 4 ReAL r U rellY ThIR30? BCuz U LoOOK yungEr ReLLY :) :) *KiSS* *mWAH* i loVe uR uPDateS sPEciaLLY wHen U sAy MiCROSoft sUX beCauSe TheY sOoOoOoOoOoOo dO! oMG rEaLLY!!! bIll GaTEs is a HIdEus TRoLl oF a MaN noT a HoTTIe lIak u AND LiNuS TrIvOlDooReEs!!1! ok u HottIE hIt mE baCk nD ADD mE to uR mySPace DARlinG ;-) ;-) <3 *mWAH*
:)
HaPPY bIrthDAy HEMOS
I know this is April Fool's Day because they actually used the correct spelling of "congratulations".
is clearly loaded and has no business posting more stories. Go sleep it off dude before my eyes explode.
That's FUNNY!
Not only it's one day early, the site turned to really pinkish Ghey.
DA GOGGLES DO NOTHING!
Freestyle. It's ok to try their bodies, which can look like these music videos are a lot of your own style of freestyling is all. Good luck and natural. Also, make sure your toes forward and groovin', but here are a samurai, wield a crouching or J Dogg utilizes this trick) to moving your thang and transplanting them that leg move your weight forward and the air...high flying legwork earns points with
The pink is actually pretty pleasing to the eyes. Odd... I like it. Anyway of keeping it around?
Earn a % of cash back from Newegg, Tiger Direct, Walmart.com, and more: http://www.mrrebates.com?refid=458505
Man, first I read it as OMG Penties... Then I put on my glasses...
I think we need more fashion stuff at Slashdot.
More sex, too. More lesbians would be a good compromise to start with.
Might be beneficial for the birthday boy in the coming decade.
Pink for Homos birthday?
Nice...
I was in the process of getting my company, a Fortune 500 company in the defense sector with global operations, to switch major IT components to open source software. I had proposed that we switch our current nightmarish mix of Windows NT, 2000, XP, VMS, AIX, IIS, MSSQL, Oracle, Sybase, .Net, C++, VB, ActiveX, Java, Snobol, COBOL, Punch cards, and a giant wall of post-it notes with Linux, Apache, MySQL, and Perl.
The management was very worried about the level of support, but of course I assured them that we could do everything in-house. Then, they were worried that Linux and the "free software hippie crowd" was too unprofessional, and we would lose prestiege using their products. I had assured them that you guys were clean-cut, well-adjusted young men dedicatted to the scholarly task of Software Engineering, and was showing them around the F/OSS sites to prove my point. Everything was going well, until I came to Slashdot.
First, a wall of pink assaulted their eyes, and a collective gasp came out of the wall of grey suits in the conference room. Then the "OMG!!! Ponies!!!" tagline slowly sank in, and before I could react, they had noticed the very unprofessional line of emoticons (against Company Information Technology Policy CITP-0034A-1), and use of official sites to convey personal messages (against Company Information Technology Policy CITP-1138-THX). I panicked, and started to explain that there must be something wrong, they must have been hacked by teenage girls or something, but before I could go further, The Chairman Himself spoke up. He said, "My god, either they're a bunch of preverts an hemos-"(I think he meant homos)"-or they've been pwn3d by some little girlies!" (I'm still not sure if I heard him say 'pwn3d'-maybe I imagined it in the stress of the moment).
The Chairman then went on to explain that there was no way that our company, a respectable organization founded by, and still run by, patriotic God-fearing Anglo-Saxon males, could get mixed up with such a deviant and preverted group of people, and there was no way we could trust any software from 'men' such as these, no sir. The company's Open Source project was quietly shut down after that, and now they've even removed FireFox and gone back to "Good old-fashioned American-as-apple-pie Internet Explorer".
Now I have been fired, and sent to Guantanamo Bay for treasonous actions such as mine. I was able to smuggle a Commie 64 here up my ass, though, and my cellmate Junis from Afghanistan has been showing me how to use it to browse the web and get to Slashdot.
Dear God, my life sucks now. And it's all because of YOU, Taco!
Sincerely,
Inamate TRG-113
Studies have shown that Pink...while soothing for the first hour or so then causes EXTREME violence.
http://www.colormatters.com/body_pink.html
I can feel it! You would'nt like me when I'm angry.
Now it's not about fooling anyone, it's about to loose an entire slashdot day with bullshit and treating us like idiots.
Aren't squeezing his own man boobs enough?
It's not offtopic, dumbass. It's orthogonal.
Birthday picture.
'Once scientists, even the dim-witted social scientists, get muzzled, the Western Civilization is finished.' - oldhack
Seems you're getting an early start this year, Taco. Anyone remember last year when he went on a caffeine-induced spree and posted the same 4 articles at the rate of 1 per minute for close to an hour. His present to everyone who has ever posted 'DUPE!'
Remember Taco, it's only funny until someone gets hurt. And OMG PONIES ROXOR!
But why it pink? He gay or summin?
ERROR ERROR Sig too long Sig will now END.
Argghhh...I....can't...see....blinded...must...plu ck...out...eyes...
rm
Sci-Fi Storm
Fantastic. I forgot that April Fools Day was an entire day wasted to completely meaningless drivel posted to an otherwise newsworthy site. C'mon Slashdot, you've been around what, 10 years now? Time to grow up and dispense with the april fools crap.
Wow, that's pathetic.
Looks like Ol' Gordo just screwed the pooch.
Woohoo! Glassy Ponies layout.
That's just hilarious and so web 2.0.
It's all PINK on the INSIDE!
A Passionate Independent Musician
...if you are anywhere BUT the Americas for the most part. It's April 1st in most of the world now.
rm
Sci-Fi Storm
OMG! THIS IS SO KEWL!
I see shitdot has become totally useless
Yeah - so Hemos won't see this until his current Pokemon game is over (I kid you not). I'll have a T-shirt made and give it to him next week in Boston so he can enjoy the Pinkness of it all. Congrats Jeff. Never thought you'd make it to 30.... I need to aim better next time! Col
Rich people are eccentric. Poor people are strange. Me, I'd be happy with odd.
Many more BD's Buddy
Happy birthday, hemos. :)
The filesystem is the package manager
Who?
nice one
The Venture Brothers
"MIT betrayed all of its basic principles."
Happy b'day Hemos !!!!
Thanks for Slashdot
- Enrico
look for Steve Jobs to send you a Limited Edition 30th Anniversary Put-It-Together-Yourself Apple I.
Or maybe just a cake.
Talk about an easy way to break any Slashdot addiction you thought you might have had!
This issue is a bit more complicated than you think.
I have been assimilated.
Happy Birthday Master Bates. The *pink* slashdot theme is for you to mark a new beginning to an era. Master Bates love pink.
... but in Soviet USA, world revolves around YOU!
Use Ctrl-C instead of ESC in Vim!
Mod him up. Informative.
too many jokes around slashdot today.
Your website isn't compliant either. Learn to close your links, idiot.
Typical anti-slash. Too ready to criticize others when they should be looking at themselves.
This same happy birthday hemos story has been reposted, what, like 30 times already. Jesus, this was old news like 7 years ago
If voting were effective, it would be illegal by now.
now what would be really funny is if they collected all of the e-mail addresses that sent him e-mail for spam purposes
Which was very strange to contemplate.
Physics is like sex: sure, it may give some practical results, but that's not why we do it.
APRIL FOOLS!
sic
i sent , errrm, one?
bwah ha ha . . .
2^3 * 31 * 647
CowboyNeal (according to slashnet irc network info) had his 30. birthday on 20. March 2006!
I misread the title as Happy Birthday Homos...
go fig what with the color and all
--MaxPowerDJ