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Blue Ring Around Uranus
ZedNaught writes "The BBC is reporting that 'astronomers have discovered that the planet Uranus has a blue ring - only the second found in the Solar System. Like the blue ring of Saturn, it probably owes its existence to an accompanying small moon.' According to the April issue of Science, the blue ring is one of two new outer rings recently discovered around Uranus using the infrared Keck adaptive optics system. The rings are blue and red like Saturn's E and G rings. The blue ring around Saturn hosts the moon Enceladus while the Uranus ring contains the moon Mab."
I should get that checked out....
"The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge." - Daniel Boorstin
more like a brown ring...
How many Uranus jokes do people have to make before we finally get the name changed to something a little more tasteful? I'm thinking something along the lines of Urectum. Or do I have to wait around until 2620 to see that happen?
After calming me down with some orange slices and some fetal spooning, E.T. revealed to me his singular purpose.
If ever there were a topic begging for a goatse post, this is it.
You should see the ring around the other guy...
In other news, Uranus has filed suit against Neptune for making it pick up the soap, which Pluto clearly dropped.
Talk about chumming for Trolls
You will see me around a lot today...
A blue ring is not as bad as some of the coffee rings that my Dad leaves on the countertop when he visits.
we've found the proverbial "blue moon?"
"National Security is the chief cause of national insecurity." - Celine's First Law
My doctor gave me a very effective cream for this condition..
You just smear it on the optics of the telescope and voila, no more rings!
Whenever Mrs. Fitch breaks wind, we beat the dog.
I guess Papa Smurf forgot to clean up...
I'm an astronomy geek, and even I sniggered at the title. I don't think there is anyone on Earth who can resist a good Uranus pun.
OMG! Pretty rainbows around a planet. Did they find ponies also?
Table-ized A.I.
I, for one, salute our new blue ringed overlord.
Still not a serious comment on the news story...
In any case, I found it odd that when MSNBC reported on this a few days ago they called the ring "rare". Considering that we have a whole 8-10 planets to base this on (depending on who's definition you use of "planet") I would consider the 20-25% of "blue ring" planets to be fairly common. It's not like this is an albino Kodiak or some other anomaly.
Aside from that have a blast mocking the planet for it's unfortunate name. What were they thinking? It's like naming a boy Sue or some such nonsense.
Dedicated Cthulhu Cultist since 4523 BC.
How is NASA going to pitch the missions?
The Uranus Probes?
I'd hate to be the mission-director for that one...
I don't know the meaning of the word 'don't' - J
a place where the sun don't shine...
Does he shove coffee mugs up his ass to get it that wide? Huggee's Pullups(TM) diapers are available on sail at Walmart, in He-Man or She-Ra themes.
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please type the word in this image: ARSEnic
the BROWN ring...ba-dum-dum. Hadda be done
0x09F911029D74E35BD84156C5635688C0
Every single Slashdotter who thinks they're hilarious will inevitably make their way down the comments, groan that they weren't the first to the joke, and then attempt to make one anyway.. ... the thought clearly never crossed my mind! Ahem.
I've got the spirit, lose the feeling.
When you buy the blue colored Charmin.
That's gotta be the weirdest comment spam I've seen in a while. And, incidentally, the first comment spam I've ever seen on /.
In other news the 10th 'planet' has finally been named Mykok, pronounced Mick Oak.
Para los personas quienes solo leen Español:
En ingles, literalmente es "un anillo azul rodeando a su culo." Ah, los gringos son locos.
Yo creo que el articulo dice que taco es una mariposa, tambien. No estoy seguro.
Quite interesting... Uranus' moon is part of the ring - the particles are hitting it - and the moon is slowly disintegrating. Wonder how long it will take for the moon to completely dissolve into the ring.
--- lm747
Does someone here know how Voyager missed this?
Man walks in to the waiting-room at his doctors office.
There is his old friend he hasn't seen in a while also waiting for his appointment.
Man: - It's kind of embarrassing to say but I come here because I have a blue ring around my penis.
Friend: - What a coincidence, I am here with a similar problem. I have a red ring around my penis.
Friend goes in to doctors office and comes out after two minutes, smiling.
Friend: - Doctor said I should not worry, just go and take a shower.
Man goes into doctors office and doctor takes a look at his "problem".
Doctor: - Sorry to say but I will have to amputate your penis.
Man: - But that's not what you told my friend with almost the same problem.
Doctor: - You have to understand that there is a clear difference between lipstick and gangrene.
Probably nothing.
Damn 2000 flushes splashback...
This guy's the limit!
because its always looked brown to me...
DEAD DEAD DEAD DELETE ME
As long as the ring is not red and itchy, Uranus will be fine.
Why are you look at my anus in the first place?
To err is human; effective mayhem requires the root password!
I mentioned, on another tech news website I won't name, they should be called the Blue Angel rings.
Can someone please explain what the difference between a "small moon" and a "large asteroid" is?
By my own definition asteroids are something that are flying through space and moons are small planets/rocks that are orbiting something... I guess it comes down to definition of "a planet".
Is it a matter of size or what? Why was "our" Moon not labeled: "Large Dustry Rock Orbiting Earth"?
There's a punchline somewhere out there, trust me.
Is that like putting shoe polish on the periscope/telescope?
Because back then Saturn remembered to put the seat down.
Windows has detected an undetectable error.
... Wipe better next time, umm k?
"[+] uranus, science, space, astronomy, anal (tagging beta)"
Windows has detected an undetectable error.
Thats what happens when the water splashes up. Damn 2000 flushes...
from the tagging beta:
uranus, anal, science, space, astronomy (tagging beta)
hilarious
Kent Simon Multitheft Auto
Upon discovery of the blue ring NASA administrators immediatly began a search for an Astroproctologist.
Must be due to Ms. Katie Colonic jumping the peacock network. Colors are all smudged.
...he ate a smurf?
+1, Beavis.
A-huhuh-huhuhuhuhuh....huhuhuh....
Weaselmancer
rediculous.
Anyway, perhaps a tune more relevant to this particular story would be better for a goatse ringtone. How about Crystal Gayle's "Don't it make your brown eyes blue".
Ahh - My eye!
The doctor said I'm not supposed to get Slashdot in it!
A buddy of mine was just chatting some politics with me. He said I should cheer up. He said, 20 years from now, we will think nothing of it when our president does the "Beavis giggle" when discussing anything "sensitive". Having ended that conversation only to read this one, clearly, my friend is on to something here...
Math is math. Regular expression is regular expression. The tools are there. The future is now.
Okay, I know that the Hubble has excellent optics, but did we not send spacecraft to the outer planets about 15 years ago? Did Voyager not do a close pass of Uranus and Neptune? Why then did Voyager not see these rings? Even with its inferior optics compared to Hubble, at that close of a range, Voyager should have been able to see them. Are the rings a new phenomenum? Anyone have any thoughts?
So many lame jokes here. Tisk tisk. If you wonder why it has the name it has, this is the reason. "Uranus (pronounced "yr-AYN-us", or "YOOR--nus") is the seventh planet from the Sun. It is a gas giant, the third largest by diameter and fourth largest by mass. It was named after the Greek god Ouranos, and is the only planet in the solar system named after a Greek god: all others are named after Roman deities."
I assure you, there is no blue ring around my anus.
... will help red rings, but has never been tested on blue ones.
---------
There is inferior bacteria on the interior of your posterior.
http://www.ips-planetarium.org/planetarian/article s/folkloreBlueMoon.html
"National Security is the chief cause of national insecurity." - Celine's First Law
These Uranus jokes are getting out of hand. Really, why don't they just change Uranus's name to something less offensive? And please, no funny business with names like Miass or Butfuka, either! The joke's not funny. Not at all! Really. No.
As much as I'd like to be, I guess I really shouldn't be surprised at the amount of Uranus jokes on Slashdot. What, are we 10 now?
Scorta futuere amo!
The thought occurs that since the ring is blue, it might have formed by some object having rammed Uranus pretty hard. This doesn't fully explain the red ring, but in either case, this theory sounds good on the whole.
If you get this, we're 10 of a kind.
I heard that to stop all the juvenile jokes about its name, Uranus had been changed to 'Urectum'. I am sure I saw that on some future documentary show.
eating smurfs.
Join the Slashcott! Feb 10 thru Feb 17!
The blue ring gets all the attention but you will notice the smaller RED ring and the much smaller BROWN rings recieved no mention in the article...
OH JEEZE I just caught a NASTY visual of that!
CRAP now 've got to go wash my eyes out...
DAMIT, why do I do that to myself!
That's why the 2000 Flushes Blue tablet goes in your tank, not your trunk.
Fry: "Hey, as long as you don't make me smell Uranus." *laughs*
Leela: "I don't get it."
Professor: "I'm sorry, Fry, but astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all."
Fry: "Oh. What's it called now?"
Professor: "Urectum."
- First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then ???, then profit.
...and I thought blue balls were bad!
"Be kind, for everyone you meet is facing a great battle." - Philo of Alexandria -
Do you remember some years ago when the first probe visited Uranus? The astronomers couldn't talk about "our probe of Uranus" with straight faces, so they changed the planet's pronunciation from "your anus" to "urinous." Not that "our urinous probe" is much better, if you ask me.
German: Ihr Anus
Dutch: uw anus
French: vos anus
Italian: il vostro anus
Portuguese: seu anus
Spanish: su anus
It's not offtopic, dumbass. It's orthogonal.
How many uranus jokes does it take to change a lightbulb?
http://www.solarviews.com/eng/uranus.htm
Rings have been known about since 1977. Voyager "didn't see it" because voyager couldn't see in color.
Early in my career I worked at a city observatory and planetarium where among other duties I had to help with public visits. Damn near every single guy who walked through the doors immediately cracked some lame Uranus joke, and then expected us to laugh, as if it was the funniest, most original thing we'd ever heard. They were always amazed that we weren't rolling on the floors afterwards.
I fucking hate that planet now.
What's the crust like on uranus?
we've never sent any probes to Uranus?
Are we afraid of the results?
*DrugCheese rants*
I wonder...
Blue Ring Around Uranus
Do the slashdot editors even read the HEADLINE?
Frink: Nice try floyd, but you were designed for scrubbing, and scrubbing is what you shall do.
You need one of these then.
If my call is important, why am I talking to a recording?
Somebody got splashed with the TidyBowl.
Cue Futurama jokes about smelling Uranus.
WORST PLANET NAME EVER....
seriously did nobody think of this when they name Uranus??????
actually I am happy to see you, however that is in fact a banana in my pocket.
Let's probe Uranus.
Uranus is big and gassy.
Hey Servo, we need to go to Uranus and wipe out the Klingons.
The ______ Agenda
...it wasn't brown.
Now that would have just been nasty.
Doesn't this just confirm Intelligent Design?
(Ducks)
Yur-uh-nus
(Grow up!)
(Cut your hair)
(Get a job)
(Stay away from the sheep)
You've heard them all I am sure.
...in scientific circles, we pronounce "Uranus" "your-an-us" not "your anus".
And it is definitely "Orion's sword," and not *taht* kind of sword you dirty little geeks.
Stick Men
I couldn't help it, I didn't notice the toilet bowl cleaner when I sat down... Now I have this friggin blue ring around my anus.
That's my holla hoop, now stop looking at my ass!
Article headline is just a typo - everybody knows that Uranus has a brown ring.
Screw the farkers, I refer you to my response to a previous Slashdot Uranus story.
2 6/190223
http://science.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=03/09/
GCHQ Quantum Insert installed. If only our tongues were made of glass, how much more careful we would be when we speak
Quoth the summary:
ZedNaught writes "The BBC is reporting that 'astronomers have discovered that the planet Uranus has a blue ring - only the second found in the Solar System. Like the blue ring of Saturn, it probably owes its existence to an accompanying small moon.' According to the April issue of Science, the blue ring is one of two new outer rings recently discovered around Uranus using the infrared Keck adaptive optics system. The rings are blue and red like Saturn's E and G rings. The blue ring around Saturn hosts the moon Enceladus while the Uranus ring contains the moon Mab."
For some reason this popped into my head: There's a ring around Uranus and its blue There's a ring around Uranus and its blue There's a ring around Uranus and its here to entertain us There's a ring around Uranus and its blue! Hey, if someone else can post the whole greek/latin background of where the word Uranus came from, im NOT the saddest person in the room ;)
"Sarcasm is for *winners*, Alan." - Charlie Harper (Two and a Half Men)
I supposit, uumm, suppose, or posit that this could make for more than "missile-aneous reeding"...
Now, imagine the jokes if it were pronounced "urine-us"...(YOU'RE-n-USS")
(image word: "joyfully")
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
be FIRST:
"We intend to be the FIRST in EVERTHING: Militarily, technologically, economically.... That means we intend to be the FIRST to plant a flag on URANUS... And IFFFF somehow you beat us to URANUS, we'll play capture the f(L)ag there and viciously knock over or clip and chop down your poles mounted on URANUS..."
Yeh, we can then rewrite the Star Spangled Banner...
"Oh, say can you STREAM, by the BROWN dirty LIGHT?
What so PROUDLY we ASSailed, by the tight-light that's GLEAMING....
Oh, say does that stank-pole there tattered and stained...
From the POHH-kets of deBRIS..."
Nah.. with so much potential to be lambasted and ASSaulted politically, MAYBE just MAYBE a smaller country will be allowed to be FIRST for a change...
(As a "frickin' Alien", I declare the right to ridicule ANY terran words... but, since I was deposited on this rock without a choice in birth canals, I only know (for now) THOSE flag-related tunes...)
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
Without so much as batting an eyelash she quipped "That can be arranged!"
The rest is history.
What else is there to say?
http://www.abc.net.au/science/news/stories/s930305 .htm
Quite a few jokes circulated after those news, such as: "Two young astronomy students sit on a beach, watch the stars, until the guy says romantically "where would you rather be, on the ground (=Earth) or on Huya"..
mm doesnt quite work in English though..