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Attack of the Clones Leaked
dgris writes "ain't it cool is running a purported review of Epidsode II. Harry Knowles is claiming to have gotten a secret screening of the film while at the South by Southwest festival in Austin, TX. Short story: he loves it." Like the department sez: I'll believe it when I see it. After Phantom, I'm willing to wait a bit to see it.
And the publicity from this review is accidental too.
) Human Kind Vs Human Creation
) It'd be interesting to see how many humans would survive to serve us.
He didn't see the real movie. It was probably just a stupid clone, only one among tens of thousands :)
Look at the stuff that gets slashdotted these days. Can't you tell when someone has made up something based on the trailers they saw? I mean come on.
The GeekNights podcast is going strong. Listen!
What? You say this guy saw the new Star Wars movie well before it was supposed to be displayed publically? And he has proof of this?
Wait, you mean he has no proof? You mean he gives no sources for his information? You mean everything he says is peripheral information about the film that could have been gleaned from the trailers? You mean that there's no reason to believe that this is real?
I'll also wager that tomorrow, we'll see a Slashdot story detailing how the review was "forcably removed" from the site by Lucasarts (who will deny any involvement, because they're not involved) and "pirated" copies of the text will circulate around the 'net, hyping up an already overhyped movie.
This is not the review you are looking for. You can go about your business. Move along.
and how would anyone be able to validate whether the 'review' is real or not? I scanned through it and did not see any strikingly new information. I wonder how difficult it would be to write a fake review.
I don't think Ain't It Cool has ever posted a review of anything, just the usual fanboy slobbering.
You guys run this same story every month about someone claiming to have seen the movie, or have a script.
1) Its just a freaking movie
2) After the last one, I'm not sure why you're so eager to be disappointed.
3) Stop acting like 15 year old fanboys.
STAR WARS EPISODE TWO: ATTACK OF THE CLONES early cut review
I saw Star Wars Episode Two: Attack of the Clones hours ago. The ?how? of that will be a thing of mystery buried in a passed piece of paper from my book signing with a hotel, a room number and a time listed upon it. You don?t want to know about that room or the person(s) in that room, you want to know about Episode Two.
Jar Jar Binks. Jar Jar has a 15 second StepInFetchIt shuffle speak routine he does as he goes to first let Obi Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker into the Amidala?s quarters that is so offensively awful, that it will not only make you recoil in horror, but it will remind you of all of the worst aspects of his character from THE PHANTOM MENACE. I wanted to burn the film, destroy, maim and murder it at this stage. I was steeling myself from the impending incompetence, the horror of my childhood being molested. I was prepared to have a very bad time.
I found myself not liking Anakin Skywalker at all, he?s a punk spoiled brat? A snotty nosed ego trip, that angry evil high school football quarterback that wants the head cheerleader. He whines like a Mark Hamill squealing about going to Toshi Station to get some power converters. There is much anger in him. He?s impulsive, conflicted, out of control and a mass murderer. Everytime I saw him and Natalie Portman together, I wanted to tell her to run, fly you fool. But am I not supposed to feel that way?
So did George Lucas drop the ball? Did he rape our childhood? Has he turned into nothing more than flannel wearing toy salesman without a soul or an eye for storytelling anymore? Was I disappointed to such a state that I wanted to yell and scream and break my original 12 inch Boba Fett and defecate upon it in a ritualistic purging of all that was once sacred to my childhood?
To answer all of those questions?. THANK GOD NO!!! Lucas succeeds with the film beyond my wildest dreams.
I was scared and thrilled to be watching Episode 2. The entire time I was in that hotel room, I was convinced that agents of Lucasfilm were going to knock down the doors and I knew I was being set up for a fall. I mean, it isn?t possible to see STAR WARS early. I know that, but there I was watching it. Listening to the sounds of drunk SXSW revelers falling into the door outside.
After about 20 minutes of that awareness everything but the film ceased to exist. The lights in the room dimmed in my mind. The person(s) in the room shrank like Scott Carey into the microverse. Everything about me was concentrating upon the film. The movie was not complete. There were moments where the effects were quite rough, but the work that was finished, was beyond reproach.
How do I explain the success of ATTACK OF THE CLONES? First, I must say that this film makes THE PHANTOM MENACE a better film. In fact, I would have to say that not only does it do that, but suddenly you will realize with horror, exactly why Jar Jar Binks is in the series at all. Upon first viewing, in less than ideal circumstances, I must say that I feel that this is by far the most entertaining Star Wars film to date. It may not have that innocent sense of wonder for the first film. It doesn?t have that sense of intimacy that EMPIRE STRIKES BACK had, or that film?s desperation. However, it also doesn?t have the trivial frivolity of JEDI or MENACE. ATTACK OF THE CLONES is a turning point in the saga. The point of no return.
I love this film desperately. I want to continually watch it for about a week with my best friends. I want to see it digitally projected with sternum shaking sound. I want to watch as friends discover the twists that Palpatine/Sidious/Dooku have in store for us. I want to have the conversations about what this all means, the speculative conversations about how these elements will play out in the final chapter of the prequels.
What is great about the film?
Obi Wan Kenobi / Ewan McGregor. He just owns the role now. There is a moment in the Cantina/Sports Bar on the surface level of Coruscant, where he and Anakin have chased an assassin. As they enter this packed sci-yuppie-scum club, they realize they can?t seem to be able to see ?the assassin? anymore. Anakin wants to rush in, tear the place apart looking for the suspect. Obi Wan tells him to slow down or something then turns to head in a different direction, Anakin asks him, "Where you going?" to which Kenobi dryly responds, "To get something to drink." Kenobi is just that calm about things. He is the king of cool. He?ll get his suspect, but he?s going to get a drink first. Priorities. I was reminded of him telling Luke to let go and to trust his feelings. He doesn?t repeat that here, he simply lets go and trusts his feelings. We see it as an action, a path he chose. Then when he gets to that bar, leaning on it, sipping that odd drink, a drug dealer comes up to him and asks, "Wanna buy some deathsticks?" Obi Wan responds, "You don?t want to sell me death sticks." Drug dealer says, "I don?t want to sell you death sticks." "You want to go home and rethink your direction in life," Kenobi continues. "I want to go home and rethink my direction in life," the dealer says as he blankly turns and walks out of the club. Before he can get too smug about his little trick he senses the assassin behind him and he pulls the patented Obi Wan pivoting light saber at a bar strike that you?ve seen in the trailer. He gets his suspect and he?s never broke a sweat. He is the master. Kenobi is just plainly cool in the film. Watch how he handles things on Camino or the way he doesn?t betray a single thought in his conversation with Jango Fett there. He knows his game, his methods and his ways. He is confident and completely on the clock. Ewan is relaxed in the role, clearly having fun and is very very very good in the film. Contrary to Moriarty?s assertion that he would be more ?Han Solo? he is in fact much more Master Li Mu Bai (Chow Yun Fat from CROUCHING TIGER HIDDEN DRAGON) but without the romance.
Jango Fett ? Boba Fett / Temuera Morrison ? Daniel Logan -- I love this pair. I love them because they are the renegade Father and Son. They have their own set of rules, they are a self contained functioning unit. Jango wanted a son to raise his own way, that doesn?t mean he beats him and does evil things. He loves his kid. He?s training him to be a good Bounty Hunter like he is. There is very much a father/son ? Master/Apprentice style thing going on here. And they have my favorite moment of the entire film, which is a tiny little moment between these two. Jango and Boba are headed to Genosia when they pick up that Kenobi is tailing them. They dive into the asteroid belt surrounding Genosia, Obi Wan trails behind them, not being lost. Jango tells Boba something like, "Prepare the sonic mines, we?ll give him?" something, I couldn?t make out? but Boba presses some buttons while doing what I can only describe as an evil giggle? a delighted giggle. Jango looks at him smiling, as if to say? "That?s my boy!" The moment is so honest and real. I?ve never seen a father ? son moment like this in science fiction. Completely classic.
Anakin Skywalker - Padme Amidala / Hayden Christensen ? Natalie Portman -- First Anakin is just an ass in this film. Like I said earlier, I can?t stand him. He?s like that boy in the TWILIGHT ZONE movie that has too much power and thinks about using it too much, but sometimes it goes terribly astray. Portman?s Padme in this film has mostly dropped the ?high speak? that she had from the first film?. Injecting into her character far more vocal variety than the droll monotone of the first film that killed the performance. Here she infuses the character with more of herself, which is a very good thing. I like that she doesn?t want to have anything to do with Anakin. That she constantly is aware of all the reasons they shouldn?t be together. Of the scandal. Of their careers. Anakin hates being told no. She can see all the reasons, but when they go through what they go through? When the emotional binding takes place between these characters through a brief adventure, a loss of a loved one, a decent into hell? When faced with certain doom, they realize that life is too short to worry about the ifs and buts? And when it happens? John Williams? love theme kicks in. This really kicks in just as Anakin and Padme kiss before being taken out and strung up in the arena (you know the sequence when they are chained against the pillars.) It actually starts from the shot (which we see in the trailer - of the arena with all the Geonosis creatures seated and cheering - the long shot looking from high to low). It consists of maybe three instruments playing at first, classic violin, very sorrowful and warm. It almost sounds a little bit like the theme for the Incredible Hulk TV series with Lou Ferrigno. The intros are similar before other instruments join in. It also reminded me of Francis Lai?s theme from Arthur Hiller?s LOVE STORY. Although it is strikingly different from other parts in the film, IT FITS IN BEAUTIFULLY. Elegant but not soppy. Gentle but not melodramatic. Williams thinking differently (after all, a very different relationship from Han and Leia!) and succeeding. It starts to crescendo as the lovers are wheeled out into the arena (reminded me of the shot of Luke with the twin suns) - same type of crescendo. It continues through the cuts between Obi-Wan chained and them being taken over to the same place but changes into a military drum style (you know, the thumping dictatorship heavy beat - almost like the 'sacrifice has arrived'). This changes the whole tone as we realize their 'moment' has been intruded and they are in serious poodoo. The romance is handled in terms of familiarity and proximity. This is that sort of romance where one loves the other, but only at the point of an emotional precipice where the other could see that they shared that feeling and embrace it. I liked this.
Palpatine-Sidious ? Count Dooku-Darth Tyrannus / Ian McDiarmid ? Christopher Lee -- Wow. Ok, read no spoilers about all of this. I remember thinking that Lucas could be soft in the head for trying to fool the audience into thinking Palpatine isn?t Sidious. I mean we can see that in the credits. What the hell? Right? See that is so like a self-centered audience. To sit there and think they are the center of the universe. The Palpatine-Sidious thing from the first film? The trade dispute? All of it not only makes sense with this film, but the way it unfolds. As you see the point of the various guises and names? How Yoda and Windu sense no ?disturbance? around Palpatine? There are reasons for these things? Just because you don?t know them yet, doesn?t mean Lucas doesn?t know what he?s doing? Upon seeing this film, seeing how he handles these two characters being 4 characters? It is genius. Compelling Machiavellian positioning and deception. There are points in this film where I wanted to scream at the screen and say, "Palpatine is an evil Sith Lord! They?re conspiring to destroy the Republic from within!" That?s when Christopher Lee essentially tells Obi Wan the same thing? My god. The evil. The evil of using the truth, knowing it could only be interpreted as being a deception and a lie. The Devil uses truth to betray mankind, because he is expected to lie? and the truth sounds better, but will never be believed. Just wait till you see how the Death Star plays into this? You?ll friggin die! FANTASTIC.
Yoda-Dooku fight? HOLY GOD! Right now there is a lot of speculation about Yoda with lightning. It is on one of the soundtrack covers. When you look at that. When people described the ball of lightning in Yoda?s hands from ShoWest, I thought they were insane. I thought only the bad guys did that. When I saw the film, well? I can tell you exactly how that moment plays out. So far as I have seen that hasn?t leaked and it isn?t a huge spoiler. When Yoda and Dooku first set up to go at it, Dooku hurls lightning at Yoda? Yes, Chris Lee?s character is that strong. Perhaps the strongest character with the force I have ever seen in Star Wars history. He attacks Yoda with lightning, Yoda captures it, twirls it around, balls it up and redirects it back at Lee. When I saw this, I screamed like a little girl. I mean it was like Uncle Tony grabbed my pantied ass. I jumped about 12 feet up in the air and squealed. WHAT A THRILL! The Yoda ? Dooku fight is astonishing. I can not emphasize that enough. I have been thinking for quite some time that there was no way on earth that Yoda with a light saber could look cool. Folks, not only does it look cool, but there will be a collective scream of HOLY SHIT when what happens happens. Yoda?s fighting style is? well let?s just say he could kick all your asses. Oh and by the way, Williams? DUEL OF THE FATES was nothing in comparison to this. Remember Vader vs Luke in EMPIRE? How overwhelmingly powerful Vader felt in comparison to Luke. Remember how weak Vader felt in comparison to the Emperor? Now imagine someone with The emperor?s powers in a full on battle with a master. Here towers of metal are torn asunder with the power of the force. The ceiling ripped apart. Seemingly unlimited strength with the force. You will quiver, shake and scream. You are warned.
You have to understand something in going into this film. What you have seen in Star Wars movies before were skirmishes? incidents? Remember, The Battle of Hoth was small, a minor hiccup. In ATTACK OF THE CLONES, you have the first REAL Star War. It isn?t a space battle, but you understand the scale of things. The size and scope of a MAJOR OFFENSIVE. And unlike in PHANTOM MENACE, where Lucas decided to cut up the action by trying to intercut three consecutive arenas of battle, here he portrays the action linearly? basically following Obi Wan and Anakin and Padme? who all basically stick together, with Padme taking a roll in some sand to miss out on the Dooku battle.
After the film was finished playing I was just beside myself with glee.
Right now it is a very interesting time for Star Wars fandom. PHANTOM MENACE polarized the audience into the faithful and those that felt it had all gone wrong. That everything was doomed. With the introduction of MATRIX and LORD OF THE RINGS into fan circles, there began to be a real angry mix. Fights, screamings and hurling of ?love it or leave it? style rhetoric.
Watching the trailers for STAR WARS: ATTACK OF THE CLONES in theaters, the audiences seemed muted in comparison to the delightful screams of approval from the SPIDER-MAN trailers.
You know those guys that have been camping up in Portland? The experience they are going to have in the theater upon that first showing? They will be so completely happy.
Now the cut I saw was still a bit rough around the edges, but folks? I can?t wait to see this on the big screen complete. To see what gets cut, what gets changed, what I notice when watching this movie the way Lucas meant for people to see it.
The source(s) that showed it to me were tired of all my LORD OF THE RINGS stuff. They were tired of all the rhetoric about Tolkien, all the focus I had on LORD OF THE RINGS. They wanted someone outside of the ranch, outside of the ?circle?, someone that seemed to be straying from the fold to see what it was that Lucas had done. What Lucas has done, is to make a film that is so relentlessly entertaining and thrilling, that there will be no movie this summer that can stand against it. This is it.
This movie is the real deal. It is smart, beautiful (god digital photography is the glory and the future of the world of film, the palette is strikingly dramatically colorful), thrilling and electrical. Essentially it is a pure action adventure science fiction fantasy with a touch of romance. Line up now. This Star Wars is for real.
P.s. To the talkbacker concerned about Jimmy Smits... He doesn't really do anything major in this film. He is next to Palpatine though right before that amazing shot of all the Clone Troopers and those Star Destroyer things... So he's close to Palpatine, but I bet he betrays Palp in the next one (speculation) Oh, I'm off to Los Angeles, so I won't be doing talk back looking on this to answer questions, but if you come to the book signing at BOOK SOUP Tuesday at 7pm, I'll answer all NON-SPOILER QUESTIONS about Episode 2. In fact, I'll even do imitations of scenes and looks on faces. I'm so jazzed about this movie now! Can't wait to share, but not spoil!!! The gods of spies have looked out for me on this one.... That sacrificial Power Puff doll was worth it!
A lot of weird shit happens at SXSW. While at first I'd be quick to dismiss something like this, stranger stuff has happened at SXSW (i.e. big name bands like REM and Green Day playing cameo shows in no-name bars) and pretty much all the big movie execs are in town to check out some of the new talent. I've lived in Austin for 3 years, and SXSW is when all the really strange "I can't believe that happened" stuff happens. Now, this guy could just be talking out his ass, but I wouldn't dismiss him totally. Lots of under-the-table stuff happens at SXSW, so even if someone said Jesus Christ had come to earth to play a show at Emo's, I wouldn't flat out dismiss it. Anyway, I'm curious to see how Ep 2 turns out, so I guess the only way we can know if he's telling the truth is to wait for the damn movie. ;)
Mat Drudge has gone to far this time.
May he burn in hell!
Anybody there would have seen this. Some guy had a second-generation VHS smuggled out of Lucasfilm and he was showing it in a tent. Anyway, it really isn't a bad movie even if it is just more of Phantom-style slapstick... as typical for this franchise, a lot of new characters and creatures. The main one is a large green ogre-like thing that lives in a swamp and really values his privacy, and then the Emporer forces a bunch of others into his area so he's sort of forced into the battle... another princess, just like episode 4... impressive effects with a flying monster that breathes fire... Jar-Jar is unfortunately back, looks a little different in this one. Not enough space war and too much singing IMHO but your mileage may vary.
How come this reminds me of The Onion's Ask A High School Student Who Didn't Do The Required Reading?
qslack.com
seeing as they didn't finish TPM until almost a week before release, I'll bet that whatever cut they saw was *not* the final edit...
TBH the review sounds like it's been written by a 15 year-old script kiddie. Just look at all those BUZZWORDS that he's put in there. It's probably me, but it all sounds like so much bulls*** :/
---
"An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind" - Gandhi
Were those gungans fighting in one of the land battles. I didnt get a good look but they had the floppy ears.
Gone but not... ummm
I notice this story hasn't been published on www.whofuckingcares.com.
I've been a follower of Harry for many years. When he was an unknown, he was a fantastic source for Episode I rumors. Now that he is 'famous' his connections have increased exponentially, and I find their reviews and rumors to be pretty reliable. I don't doubt he got to see it. A months ago they had a full script review and, surprise, the newest trailer confirms what they wrote. As to whether its any good, I have to agree with a previous poster that many reviews are more fanboy slobbering than reviews, but I'm a fanboy so I usually aggree with what they say!
1) it's not /.'ed yet
2) someone beat you to it
3) they actually got the formatting in a readable manner
i agree...this article is sufficiently vaugue that i question whether the author saw the "sneak preview"....i found that there was very little information (if any) that you couldn't get from watching the trailers and reading star wars internet rumour/fan sites....
"Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true." - Homer Simpson
150 Opening BINARY mode data connection for slashdot.sig (129323052 bytes).
...that said allot of review sites don't have time to watch all th movies and review all the products, so they will sometimes just grab some basic info on the product/movie and completely bullshit the review just for the sake of having a review published on that particular product. I am not saying every review site/group does this, just that it happens more than most would expect.
Saying Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders.
Isn't this the same douchebag who claimed to have a copy of the script as well, and was raving about how fantastic the movie would be just by this lame script? I get the impression that this is either a) a Star Wars fanboy who just thinks SW is the greatest thing ever, b) being paid by Lucas to hype this dungheap, or c) trying to get more hits on his site to show more ad banners to generate more $$$. Most likely a combination of the three.
Even if it is true, WHO FUCKING CARES? Stop posting star wars stories unless the headline is "New Trailer Released" or "Episode II Now In Theaters". Any "news" other than those is completely irrelevant, stupid, and the hype will only serve to make the film even more of a let-down.
It's Lucas' story. Jar Jar or no Jar Jar...it's his story to tell. When you raise a bajillion dollars in capital, then you can make and tell your story on the big screen. Until then, STFU.
"Leaked copy" my cowardly yellow anonymous ass. "Planted copy" is more like it. Lucas is obviously scared by the success of the LOTR and Matrix franchises, and is desperate to drive up those opening weekend grosses (since that's all the big-budget movies really care about anymore), so he's pandering to the fans he drove away with "Phantom Menace" by having Knowles rave about "Clones" on the internet. Don't forget that Knowles is the same guy that raved over Phantom Menace, raved over the Emmerich/Devlin debacle Godzilla, raved over Armageddon and even admitted liking Battlefield Earth before later retracting the positive review. He's the go-to guy for studios that want to target the geek demographic, because he's the Mikey of the cinematic world.
(He'll also print anything on his tabloid website without bothering to fact-check in any capacity. I tested this once by making up the most outrageous thing possible and sending it to him in a drunken fit - do a search on aintitcool.com for "mammoth".)
I don't know Harry personally, but I'm a long-time reader of AICN. IMO, Harry's got a lot more integrity than that. I would find it very hard to believe that Harry faked a review.
People still pay attention to that site? I thought they'd been completely discredited when Harry admitted to accepting gifts in exchange for pre-release hyping of crappy movies.
When it first started gaining popularity (or at least when I first noticed it) circa 1998, I found it to be juvenile, fan boy garbage and almost entirely apocryphal or at least wildly innaccurate (to quote D Adams). I'm glad to see it hasn't changed. I'll stick with hollywoodbitchslap.com, myself.
this is getting old and so are you
blog
He probably saw it. I won't argue that.
But his opinion is crap ever since he claimed that he "cried at the end of Armagedeon". What a sell out. They were his site's biggest sponsor at the time.
I shit you not.
The original treatment of star wars was on the order of 300 pages or so. For those who haven't had the pleasure/pain of writing a script treatment, a treatment of 20-30 pages usually ends up a 100-150 page screen play. Most movies that are around 2 hrs tend to be 110-130 pages. In theory, the treatment lucas wrote was a true epic in the traditional literary definition. Now I don't know if the original treatment really was that long, since the information was from a biography show about lucas. I'm sure there's some exaggeration, but given that lucas spent a very long time writing star wars (years), it is likely we are judging with only partial information. Lucas was the one who thought of Indian Jones and other good films. Before I jump down his throat for clone wars, I'll watch it first.
Sad to tell, anyone who's followed Harry's fortunes over the years has seen him metamorphosise from a rebel outsider into a minor celebrity, feted by both individual directors and (gasp) Big Bad Studios just like any other influential mainstream reviewer. Even now, Harry still (very occasionally) gripes about mainstream reviewers, while at the same time accepting the exact same special access to sets and screenings. The only difference is that Harry explains exactly how the whole sordid business works, with reviewers buying themselves celebrity status by giving good review-bites that guarantee that their name will go up on a poster or trailer, thereby elevating them into more expensive and high class whores. And yet despite receiving the rewards, Harry would like us to believe that he is still untainted by the influence and can be trusted. This idea seems to flow from the fact that Harry explains the context behind each viewing (whether you want to hear it or not) and writes informally. It's superfically convincing, but the style of presentation is irrelevant other than for entertainment value, it's the substance that matters for a reviewer.
I am simply unwilling to believe the spy-games circumstances that Harry claims. If he has seen this film, it is with the full sanction of Lucasarts, on the implicit or explicit understanding that he would give it a rave review, and that he would imply that it was a rogue showing. And note carefully, he leaves us to infer that by describing his feelings (which nobody can prove or disprove), but never actually makes a factual statement to support it. You have a think about that.
Don't get me wrong. Perhaps it is a good movie and an honest review. But Harry can simply no longer be trusted. There are just too many examples of him raving about movies to which he has received special access for him to be a credible independent reviewer any more. I won't claim he has sold out, because he never claimed to want to be outside the system. In fact, he has made every effort to insinuate himself into the whole sorry cycle of review-reward, and I think this may very well be his crowning glory.
Sorry Harry, you used to be someone I could trust. Now you're just a shallow parody of Comic Book Guy. The circle is complete; now you are the studios' bitch. Ain't it ironic?
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
With going to see a movie the day it comes out? I just don't get it. Inflated prices, queues.. packed cinemas.. Why not just wait a week? Is it the chat-by-the-watercooler thing? Am I missing out? Probably not.
It seems like something, once upon a time, someone would have said about Sony.
--Jimmy has fancy plans; and pants to match.
Guess the first and even the second weren't enough for him.
Fuck Slashdot
Hey, I go most of what he said from the trailers and other videos on Star Wars' website. He told us nothing new except what he added to try and make it look real.
OK, people, reality check:
There is no doubt that some people have seen the movie. But this was just a rough cut. If Harry said that he was screened a rough cut, maybe I would believe him. The fact of the matter is, there is nothing is his review that hasn't been leaked in the spy reports on TheForce.Net, or in the "scriptament" that is floating on the Web.
For the book says, "We may be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us."
Well, it's not like they were impartial before, right? Now they just have an opportunity to be partial in the other direction. Kind of mirroring Anakin's fall to the Dark Side, if you will :)
Your right to not believe: Americans United for Separation of Church and
There are many simple reasons why, if Ocaam's Razor were applied (and without any lubrication whatsoever) to this.
While I suspect that Harry has read of things from the movie (of that, things are leaked like crazy: visit http://theforce.net for lots of stuff), it is HIGHLY unlikely that he's seen the movie in its final form. Why?
Because, according to LFL, the movie still has a lot of post-production work (the CGI) to be done. In fact, the latest preview is missing a few key pieces...watch the last scene where 14 Jedi are on their last stand, surrounded by a lot of aliens and battle droids. Funny that the Jedi are reflecting blaster shots which come from nowhere.
The movie isn't complete. I checked my ass--it seems that someone has been trying to blow smoke up it.
Vos teneo officium eram periculosus ut vos recipero is.
Consider the conglomeration of 'Force' and 'Fate' that surrounds the events in these movies. Think about 'Destiny' and 'Prophecy.'
Now consider that moment in Episode 1 where Qui Gon Jinn says that he will gamble the racing pod against the freedom of Anakin and his mom. Watto will only gamble against one of their freedoms and rolls the chance cube to see which. Qui Gon uses the force to ensure that it is Anakin whose freedom is gambled (and won) in the pod race.
Now think about the results of Anakin being taken from Tatooine and going with Obi Wan. Think in the scope of all 6 movies.
You see, the whole string of events that unfolded (will unfold) in episodes 2 and 3 plus ep4-6 that we've already seen are a result of this. But was it 'Fate' or 'Destiny' that made resulted in the chance cube rolling the way it did, or was it those things that made Qui Gon use the Force to free Anakin? Did Destiny guide the Force, or did the Force guide Destiny?
I think George Lucas in brilliant in this, as sooner or later, we will all realise that only because of Destiny and the roll of a chance cube was an Empire built and defeated, the way of the Jedi preserved, and Evil defeated once more. That, my friends, is what can only be produced from the mind of a master storyteller.
George Lucas, I applaud you.
We have countless stories proclaiming that the MPAA is destroying Fair Use, that they're devil spawn, that thousands of loyal Slashdot readers are boycotting the MPAA....
But then, Star Wars comes out. Lord of the Rings comes out. Resident Evil comes out. And all of the sudden, you're forking over your hard-earned money to these devils.
I have not seen a movie (aside from free TV movies) in the past year and a half. And I won't. I have scruples.
It is sad that I must always (well, almost always :) tune my impatience out, in order to have a better end result. The entertainment industry rarely shows this, esp in the pc game industry. I really hope this one is good, and is in existence to entertain by telling a great story... NOT to make money and gather as large a market as possible by literally throwing in certain elements like goofy side kick type characters, a bit of sexual inuendo, spacecraft battle (cap and skirmisher/fighter), and some blaster action popped off with lightsabers and martial arts. If these happen naturally, great. But it was obvious in Phantom Markete that they were artificially added for mass market appeal.
Now the question. Will each subsequent movie DVD release have a 'special' edition in which ONCE AGAIN Lucas claims that this time he 'got it like he wanted' and throws in another market plea (which sadly works) of anticorporate, anti-the-man and pro-freedom fighter elements of 'the suits/money was dictating blah blah blah, but now _I_ have the final say". (In case you didn't know... Lucas _IS_ the suit/money and _DOES_ have the final say from the very beginning). Either way... will each release including EP III, have a special edition, and then 2-5 years later will we have a Special Trilogy Edition? That too with 'extra footage' and 'digitally remastered' (used almost as much as 'Extreme' has been overused). Then 2-5 years after that, have a Special Epic Edition that is all 6 movies? Then perhaps 6 months - 2 years after that have a Special Star Wars Universe package that includes even the special Ewok and related childrens movies (which really includes EP I also) made for TV? I just wonder...
Why do so many people love aintitcool? It's a godawful designed website. The fonts are huge, there are too many exclamation points, and Harry is a bought out tool for the movie industry.
He said in the movie that a drug dealer approached Obi Wan and tried to sell him some Death sticks... I find it difficult to belive that George Lucas couldn't come up with a better name for a drug than DEATH STICKS! What did those annoying people at truth.com or whatever that play those anti smoking ads sponser this movie? Come on. That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever read.
"Da ist ein Technölüst in mein Unterpanten!"
How 'bout we ditch Jon Katz and hite this guy? Better yet, hire this guy and get Katz to edit out the "I orgasmed in my seat at this scene" stuff, which shouldn't be too hard as Katz never seems to like anything....
Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.
The version he saw must not have had Jar Jar in it. I'll wait till May to make my opinion
>>The Yoda holds out his hands and the lightning gets coallesced into a ball
I can just see it now. A little green muppet with the voice of Grover from Sesame Street who hasn't learned grammatic structure:
KAAAAMAAAAYHAAAAMAAAAYHAAAAAA!!!!!
Of course, the actual fight scene occurs only after lots of grunting and talking to themselves.
:-)
When I first read this post I thought that it was about a movie called "Attack of the Clones".
http://www.b.150m.com/
Possibly different people. Believe it or not, slashdot users are allowed to have different opinions from one another, even if it's rare to see them expressed.
And don't forget all of the folks who criticize OPEC's business practices, only to go out and drive/take the bus/buy plastics/eat food that was delivered in a truck. What a bunch of hypocrites.
The shame here is that people love movies. They just don't love the unethical business practices of the cartel that produces them.
All your dorks belong to us.
Harry.
Attack of the clones... he probably saw a training video for the Mormon church. It's an understandable mistake.
You conveniently forget about the hundreds of reviews he's done of big studio movies where he complains about how awful they are.
Oftentimes basing this solely on the script (Scooby Doo, anyone?).
"And like that
The language used in this review is reminiscent of the anarchy t-philes that kids used to write back in the heyday of the BBS scene. For me at least, that in itself is enough to cast doubt upon the review. It comes across as juvenile and written to whet the appetites of fans, and not much else. If it were written in a more erudite manner, I might give it a bit more creedence.
I also wonder exactly how far along Lucarfilm is in the post-production process. Would it be in a sufficiently complete state to watch easily (like the Buckaroo Banzai workprint that's made its rounds for almost twenty years now)? I don't know for certain, it's complete enough to have a trailer. How much more I don't know.
I don't know.. this seems a bit too pat. It's at the right time to cause a fervor, the timing's too neat.
Proteus' Child
Doko ni datte; hito wa, tsunagette iru.
...Couldn't agree more.
2 words:
n* - sync
Lucas is a whore, and he's not even sexy. What a waste of a perfectly good whore.
We dance to all the wrong songs.
--Refused.
It never ceases to amaze me how quickly Slashdot visitors forget their animosity towards the MPAA.
And it never ceases to amaze me how a reader of slashdot can assume there is no plurality here, amongst at least half a million others. We don't all harbor a blinding hate of the MPAA.
I wish the MPAA would drop their stance on a lot of issues. They wish I would stop using DeCSS to view DVD's on alternate OS's. They wish I would stop using Morpheus to view certain things.
But that doesn't mean I won't go and entertain myself for $8.
I have not seen a movie (aside from free TV movies) in the past year and a half. And I won't. I have scruples.
You are free to protest it, just don't expect EVERYONE on slashdot to do the same. And because one part of slashdot is like you and complains loudly, don't expect another part of slashdot not to like and discuss upcoming movies.
"And like that
Most people don't understand what it means to "cut yourself off" from Nasty Things (tm)
Harry Knowled AND South by Southwest? Whoopee...Jesus Christ, why couldn't someone have blown up this secret episode ii venue? Harry Knowles is just trying to stay in the spotlight and is obviously lying.
Listen to yourselves. You really think Lucasfilm aren't aware that the majority of the fan community has decided this film will suck? That Lucasfilm doesn't care what the mass of fans thinks about this upcoming film? That Lucasfilm isn't terrified that they won't break box office records opening weekend?
The ONLY way they can make the impact they want is to do everything in their power to make people see that the film isn't going to be crap. To that end - the latest trailer is an action packed monster that gives away the entire plot; they dragged Harry Knowles into a room and showed him a copy of the rough cut; they are willing to leak the entire plot if it will persuade the average Star Wars punter that he will see Star Wars regain its status as quality entertainment.
And you know what - I bet it'll have some effect. I'm more inclined to go see the film after the last trailer than I was after 'Forbidden Love'. I'm even more inclined to go see it after reading Harry's review. I'm probably not alone.
Why assume that Harry hasn't seen the film when it makes perfect sense for Lucasfilm to want him to see it? They just upped their box office receipts...
I live in Austin and I know that the film was _not_ screened at South by Southwest. The world premiere of Blade 2, however did take place at the festival.
-- Adam
After being flown to New York City to see a sneak extravaganza premiere of "Godzilla," Knowles ranted and raved about how it was the greatest thing he'd ever seen.
A week later, he saw it again, on his own dime, and proceeded to trash the hell out of it.
AICN has ZERO integrity. Always had, always will.
It doesn't mean much now, it's built for the future.
Judging by the quaility of the site, and what I know about SXSW, I'm not buying it. I'm not sure I understand how anyone at SXSW would have acquired a copy, and I'm further uncertain why this guy was so cool he got to see it. If you look at the comments after the review, I understand why he threw this together. The people who read his site often are all applauding him. So he's riding on a cloud right now because he is "so cool." Ain't that cool.
And if by the 1,000,000th of a percent of a chance that I'm wrong, oh well. The guy still needs to learn to use a smaller font.
Of course Palpatine is evil, doesn't anyone remember Return of the Jedi anymore? (whas it *that* bad?) Who's that dude zapping Luke with the magic bolts of lightening at the end of the film? Could it be.. "Emperor Palpatine"!?
And it never ceases to amaze me how a reader of slashdot can assume there is no plurality here
That was truly the funniest thing I read so far today.
Humph, I guess humor is a lost cause here on Slashdot, either that or Harry just doesn't like to be made fun of.
Well, it's not like I don't have Karma to burn...
III.IIVIVIXIIVIVIIIVVIIIIXVIIIXIIIIIIIIVIIIIVVIII
Now I've seen it all!
Appended to the end of comments I post? 120 chars?!
STAR WARS EPISODE TWO: ATTACK OF THE CLONES early cut review
I saw Star Wars Episode Two: Attack of the Clones hours ago. The 'how' of that will be a thing of mystery buried in a passed piece of paper from my book signing with a hotel, a room number and a time listed upon it. You don't want to know about that room or the person(s) in that room, you want to know about Episode Two.
Jar Jar Binks. Jar Jar has a 15 second StepInFetchIt shuffle speak routine he does as he goes to first let Obi Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker into the Amidala's quarters that is so offensively awful, that it will not only make you recoil in horror, but it will remind you of all of the worst aspects of his character from THE PHANTOM MENACE. I wanted to burn the film, destroy, maim and murder it at this stage. I was steeling myself from the impending incompetence, the horror of my childhood being molested. I was prepared to have a very bad time.
I found myself not liking Anakin Skywalker at all, he's a punk spoiled brat... A snotty nosed ego trip, that angry evil high school football quarterback that wants the head cheerleader. He whines like a Mark Hamill squealing about going to Toshi Station to get some power converters. There is much anger in him. He's impulsive, conflicted, out of control and a mass murderer. Everytime I saw him and Natalie Portman together, I wanted to tell her to run, fly you fool. But am I not supposed to feel that way?
So did George Lucas drop the ball? Did he rape our childhood? Has he turned into nothing more than flannel wearing toy salesman without a soul or an eye for storytelling anymore? Was I disappointed to such a state that I wanted to yell and scream and break my original 12 inch Boba Fett and defecate upon it in a ritualistic purging of all that was once sacred to my childhood?
To answer all of those questions.... THANK GOD NO!!! Lucas succeeds with the film beyond my wildest dreams.
I was scared and thrilled to be watching Episode 2. The entire time I was in that hotel room, I was convinced that agents of Lucasfilm were going to knock down the doors and I knew I was being set up for a fall. I mean, it isn't possible to see STAR WARS early. I know that, but there I was watching it. Listening to the sounds of drunk SXSW revelers falling into the door outside.
After about 20 minutes of that awareness everything but the film ceased to exist. The lights in the room dimmed in my mind. The person(s) in the room shrank like Scott Carey into the microverse. Everything about me was concentrating upon the film. The movie was not complete. There were moments where the effects were quite rough, but the work that was finished, was beyond reproach.
How do I explain the success of ATTACK OF THE CLONES? First, I must say that this film makes THE PHANTOM MENACE a better film. In fact, I would have to say that not only does it do that, but suddenly you will realize with horror, exactly why Jar Jar Binks is in the series at all. Upon first viewing, in less than ideal circumstances, I must say that I feel that this is by far the most entertaining Star Wars film to date. It may not have that innocent sense of wonder for the first film. It doesn't have that sense of intimacy that EMPIRE STRIKES BACK had, or that film's desperation. However, it also doesn't have the trivial frivolity of JEDI or MENACE. ATTACK OF THE CLONES is a turning point in the saga. The point of no return.
I love this film desperately. I want to continually watch it for about a week with my best friends. I want to see it digitally projected with sternum shaking sound. I want to watch as friends discover the twists that Palpatine/Sidious/Dooku have in store for us. I want to have the conversations about what this all means, the speculative conversations about how these elements will play out in the final chapter of the prequels.
What is great about the film?
Obi Wan Kenobi / Ewan McGregor. He just owns the role now. There is a moment in the Cantina/Sports Bar on the surface level of Coruscant, where he and Anakin have chased an assassin. As they enter this packed sci-yuppie-scum club, they realize they can't seem to be able to see 'the assassin' anymore. Anakin wants to rush in, tear the place apart looking for the suspect. Obi Wan tells him to slow down or something then turns to head in a different direction, Anakin asks him, "Where you going?" to which Kenobi dryly responds, "To get something to drink." Kenobi is just that calm about things. He is the king of cool. He'll get his suspect, but he's going to get a drink first. Priorities. I was reminded of him telling Luke to let go and to trust his feelings. He doesn't repeat that here, he simply lets go and trusts his feelings. We see it as an action, a path he chose. Then when he gets to that bar, leaning on it, sipping that odd drink, a drug dealer comes up to him and asks, "Wanna buy some deathsticks?" Obi Wan responds, "You don't want to sell me death sticks." Drug dealer says, "I don't want to sell you death sticks." "You want to go home and rethink your direction in life," Kenobi continues. "I want to go home and rethink my direction in life," the dealer says as he blankly turns and walks out of the club. Before he can get too smug about his little trick he senses the assassin behind him and he pulls the patented Obi Wan pivoting light saber at a bar strike that you've seen in the trailer. He gets his suspect and he's never broke a sweat. He is the master. Kenobi is just plainly cool in the film. Watch how he handles things on Camino or the way he doesn't betray a single thought in his conversation with Jango Fett there. He knows his game, his methods and his ways. He is confident and completely on the clock. Ewan is relaxed in the role, clearly having fun and is very very very good in the film. Contrary to Moriarty's assertion that he would be more 'Han Solo' he is in fact much more Master Li Mu Bai (Chow Yun Fat from CROUCHING TIGER HIDDEN DRAGON) but without the romance.
Jango Fett - Boba Fett / Temuera Morrison - Daniel Logan -- I love this pair. I love them because they are the renegade Father and Son. They have their own set of rules, they are a self contained functioning unit. Jango wanted a son to raise his own way, that doesn't mean he beats him and does evil things. He loves his kid. He's training him to be a good Bounty Hunter like he is. There is very much a father/son - Master/Apprentice style thing going on here. And they have my favorite moment of the entire film, which is a tiny little moment between these two. Jango and Boba are headed to Genosia when they pick up that Kenobi is tailing them. They dive into the asteroid belt surrounding Genosia, Obi Wan trails behind them, not being lost. Jango tells Boba something like, "Prepare the sonic mines, we'll give him..." something, I couldn't make out... but Boba presses some buttons while doing what I can only describe as an evil giggle... a delighted giggle. Jango looks at him smiling, as if to say... "That's my boy!" The moment is so honest and real. I've never seen a father - son moment like this in science fiction. Completely classic.
Anakin Skywalker - Padme Amidala / Hayden Christensen - Natalie Portman -- First Anakin is just an ass in this film. Like I said earlier, I can't stand him. He's like that boy in the TWILIGHT ZONE movie that has too much power and thinks about using it too much, but sometimes it goes terribly astray. Portman's Padme in this film has mostly dropped the 'high speak' that she had from the first film.... Injecting into her character far more vocal variety than the droll monotone of the first film that killed the performance. Here she infuses the character with more of herself, which is a very good thing. I like that she doesn't want to have anything to do with Anakin. That she constantly is aware of all the reasons they shouldn't be together. Of the scandal. Of their careers. Anakin hates being told no. She can see all the reasons, but when they go through what they go through... When the emotional binding takes place between these characters through a brief adventure, a loss of a loved one, a decent into hell... When faced with certain doom, they realize that life is too short to worry about the ifs and buts... And when it happens... John Williams' love theme kicks in. This really kicks in just as Anakin and Padme kiss before being taken out and strung up in the arena (you know the sequence when they are chained against the pillars.) It actually starts from the shot (which we see in the trailer - of the arena with all the Geonosis creatures seated and cheering - the long shot looking from high to low). It consists of maybe three instruments playing at first, classic violin, very sorrowful and warm. It almost sounds a little bit like the theme for the Incredible Hulk TV series with Lou Ferrigno. The intros are similar before other instruments join in. It also reminded me of Francis Lai's theme from Arthur Hiller's LOVE STORY. Although it is strikingly different from other parts in the film, IT FITS IN BEAUTIFULLY. Elegant but not soppy. Gentle but not melodramatic. Williams thinking differently (after all, a very different relationship from Han and Leia!) and succeeding. It starts to crescendo as the lovers are wheeled out into the arena (reminded me of the shot of Luke with the twin suns) - same type of crescendo. It continues through the cuts between Obi-Wan chained and them being taken over to the same place but changes into a military drum style (you know, the thumping dictatorship heavy beat - almost like the 'sacrifice has arrived'). This changes the whole tone as we realize their 'moment' has been intruded and they are in serious poodoo. The romance is handled in terms of familiarity and proximity. This is that sort of romance where one loves the other, but only at the point of an emotional precipice where the other could see that they shared that feeling and embrace it. I liked this.
Palpatine-Sidious - Count Dooku-Darth Tyrannus / Ian McDiarmid - Christopher Lee -- Wow. Ok, read no spoilers about all of this. I remember thinking that Lucas could be soft in the head for trying to fool the audience into thinking Palpatine isn't Sidious. I mean we can see that in the credits. What the hell? Right? See that is so like a self-centered audience. To sit there and think they are the center of the universe. The Palpatine-Sidious thing from the first film... The trade dispute... All of it not only makes sense with this film, but the way it unfolds. As you see the point of the various guises and names... How Yoda and Windu sense no 'disturbance' around Palpatine... There are reasons for these things... Just because you don't know them yet, doesn't mean Lucas doesn't know what he's doing... Upon seeing this film, seeing how he handles these two characters being 4 characters... It is genius. Compelling Machiavellian positioning and deception. There are points in this film where I wanted to scream at the screen and say, "Palpatine is an evil Sith Lord! They're conspiring to destroy the Republic from within!" That's when Christopher Lee essentially tells Obi Wan the same thing... My god. The evil. The evil of using the truth, knowing it could only be interpreted as being a deception and a lie. The Devil uses truth to betray mankind, because he is expected to lie... and the truth sounds better, but will never be believed. Just wait till you see how the Death Star plays into this... You'll friggin die! FANTASTIC.
Yoda-Dooku fight... HOLY GOD! Right now there is a lot of speculation about Yoda with lightning. It is on one of the soundtrack covers. When you look at that. When people described the ball of lightning in Yoda's hands from ShoWest, I thought they were insane. I thought only the bad guys did that. When I saw the film, well... I can tell you exactly how that moment plays out. So far as I have seen that hasn't leaked and it isn't a huge spoiler. When Yoda and Dooku first set up to go at it, Dooku hurls lightning at Yoda... Yes, Chris Lee's character is that strong. Perhaps the strongest character with the force I have ever seen in Star Wars history. He attacks Yoda with lightning, Yoda captures it, twirls it around, balls it up and redirects it back at Lee. When I saw this, I screamed like a little girl. I mean it was like Uncle Tony grabbed my pantied ass. I jumped about 12 feet up in the air and squealed. WHAT A THRILL! The Yoda - Dooku fight is astonishing. I can not emphasize that enough. I have been thinking for quite some time that there was no way on earth that Yoda with a light saber could look cool. Folks, not only does it look cool, but there will be a collective scream of HOLY SHIT when what happens happens. Yoda's fighting style is... well let's just say he could kick all your asses. Oh and by the way, Williams' DUEL OF THE FATES was nothing in comparison to this. Remember Vader vs Luke in EMPIRE... How overwhelmingly powerful Vader felt in comparison to Luke. Remember how weak Vader felt in comparison to the Emperor? Now imagine someone with The emperor's powers in a full on battle with a master. Here towers of metal are torn asunder with the power of the force. The ceiling ripped apart. Seemingly unlimited strength with the force. You will quiver, shake and scream. You are warned.
You have to understand something in going into this film. What you have seen in Star Wars movies before were skirmishes... incidents... Remember, The Battle of Hoth was small, a minor hiccup. In ATTACK OF THE CLONES, you have the first REAL Star War. It isn't a space battle, but you understand the scale of things. The size and scope of a MAJOR OFFENSIVE. And unlike in PHANTOM MENACE, where Lucas decided to cut up the action by trying to intercut three consecutive arenas of battle, here he portrays the action linearly... basically following Obi Wan and Anakin and Padme... who all basically stick together, with Padme taking a roll in some sand to miss out on the Dooku battle.
After the film was finished playing I was just beside myself with glee.
Right now it is a very interesting time for Star Wars fandom. PHANTOM MENACE polarized the audience into the faithful and those that felt it had all gone wrong. That everything was doomed. With the introduction of MATRIX and LORD OF THE RINGS into fan circles, there began to be a real angry mix. Fights, screamings and hurling of 'love it or leave it' style rhetoric.
Watching the trailers for STAR WARS: ATTACK OF THE CLONES in theaters, the audiences seemed muted in comparison to the delightful screams of approval from the SPIDER-MAN trailers.
You know those guys that have been camping up in Portland? The experience they are going to have in the theater upon that first showing... They will be so completely happy.
Now the cut I saw was still a bit rough around the edges, but folks... I can't wait to see this on the big screen complete. To see what gets cut, what gets changed, what I notice when watching this movie the way Lucas meant for people to see it.
The source(s) that showed it to me were tired of all my LORD OF THE RINGS stuff. They were tired of all the rhetoric about Tolkien, all the focus I had on LORD OF THE RINGS. They wanted someone outside of the ranch, outside of the 'circle', someone that seemed to be straying from the fold to see what it was that Lucas had done. What Lucas has done, is to make a film that is so relentlessly entertaining and thrilling, that there will be no movie this summer that can stand against it. This is it.
This movie is the real deal. It is smart, beautiful (god digital photography is the glory and the future of the world of film, the palette is strikingly dramatically colorful), thrilling and electrical. Essentially it is a pure action adventure science fiction fantasy with a touch of romance. Line up now. This Star Wars is for real.
P.s. To the talkbacker concerned about Jimmy Smits... He doesn't really do anything major in this film. He is next to Palpatine though right before that amazing shot of all the Clone Troopers and those Star Destroyer things... So he's close to Palpatine, but I bet he betrays Palp in the next one (speculation) Oh, I'm off to Los Angeles, so I won't be doing talk back looking on this to answer questions, but if you come to the book signing at BOOK SOUP Tuesday at 7pm, I'll answer all NON-SPOILER QUESTIONS about Episode 2. In fact, I'll even do imitations of scenes and looks on faces. I'm so jazzed about this movie now! Can't wait to share, but not spoil!!! The gods of spies have looked out for me on this one.... That sacrificial Power Puff doll was worth it!
--------------------------------------------
Customers are taking to many free napkins...
Not to say that it's going to be bad, but let's put it all in perspective. True, Harry Knowles says that Episode II is great. But keep in mind that He said the same thing about Episode I.
What's worse, he likes Jar-Jar too. In quoting from his review of Episode I, "Meesa luvs him!".
So you can put me in the "I'll believe it when I see it" camp as well.
Basically he is saying, 'put your money where your mouth is'. Are you, my friend, saying that that is a BAD thing?
I zero'd in on the 'tit' in the middle of his subject, to the point that I didn't pay attention to anything else.... hmmmm
Oh...a worse name than Death Sticks? How about ATTACK OF THE CLONES?
In Soviet Russia, hot grits put YOU down THEIR pants.
But to look at that would require THOUGHT, when it is much easier to just REACT and prove that liberals are nothing but screeching monkeys that are just as happy hurling their feces as they are eating it, and just as happy killing another 'tribe' of monkeys to 'protect their children' (hehe, its ALWAYS about the children) as they are to protect said children by killing and eating the other tribes' children. Talking does not make you sentient. Charisma is a trait... it has only been regarded as a virtue by tyrants and the fools that support them. Awareness is not achieved simply because you use that word in a sentence for what your stated (but never actually followed) cause is. (nor does putting tremendous loads of bumper stickers on a car, house, etc make you 'aware')
please read the moderator guidelines. Moderation is not for censoring. Moderation is not for ideas or (dis)agreements. If you wish to have your opinion manifested, then post a reply. You should have the maturity to say, "Damn, that guy is completely wrong and an idiot... but he brought up a good point and food for thought" Otherwise you are just beating someone for having the nerve to inform the Emperor of his nakedness.
that this movie's 'EPIC' feel will encapsulate maybe 1 or two planets... with a visit to the third?
A co-worker of mine who's seen the film twice at Skywalker Ranch said the reviewer must have seen the film because it's very accurate.
For those who didnt notice before, AICN had a review of the most recently released trailer a good while before it was ever aired on TV. While then i was very skeptical, once the trailer finally aired and i saw it for myself. AICN was right on the money, and even included word for word quotations that appeared in the trailer.
While that doesnt exactly confirm the SW2 review to be accurate, it surely shows that their news about SW2 has been accurate so far. And Im pretty confident that they wouldnt post made up stuff concerning star wars.
Of course Palpatine is evil, doesn't anyone remember Return of the Jedi anymore? (whas it *that* bad?) Who's that dude zapping Luke with the magic bolts of lightening at the end of the film? Could it be.. "Emperor Palpatine"!?
I'm afraid you're the one who doesn't remember Return of the Jedi anymore. The word "Palpatine" is never uttered in any of the classic trilogy movies. The Emperor is referred to only as "The Emperor."
The novelizations, comics, and RPGs are a different story, however.
I know someone on the site asked this, but he never explains it.
:)
Did the death of N'Sync look neat or not?
Maybe they go out doing that jumping Bye-Bye-Bye dance move they do.
And to think that all I got to see at Austin's biggest music festival were live bands. Where was the "rogue movie screening" booth? I must have missed it.
And I'd link to the article but his page has been /.'ed
No sig for you!!
unless you are going to kiss the ass of the studio.
Don't you wonder why all of these no-name critics that you see on TV trailers get to review movies before Roger Ebert?
SW
But the Cinerama is by far the best I've ever had the pleasure of visiting. It was Seattle's best older theater; bought, remodeled and brought into the THX age by Paul Allen. The screen is huge, the seats are comfy, the sound great, and inbetween what are usually the biggest, if not best, movies out at the time, you'll get the odd Kubrick film festival. In short, there is no better place to see a movie in Seattle. Hell between Vancouver BC and Portland. Seattle to Portland being the farthest I've ever driven to see a movie. In general, the vast majority of theaters in the seattle area are THX, DTS or SDDS certified. Most are relatively nice, but few have the nice nice stadium seating. Things have gone somewhat downhill after Regal and Lowes acquired Act III and Cineplexodeon (though the difference between them and Lowes isn't that great). At least they stopped forcing the poor Lowes empolyees to beg for money to help cure Terry Bradshaw's baldness or something.
And in any case, I'm sure that Cinerama will add one of the digital projectors to their entertainment aresenal. But anything I'm desperately anticipating and expecting to be a sublime movie viewing experience I go through the extra hassel and expense to see it there, and insure it's as good as possible. As good as it could ever be.
--Jimmy has fancy plans; and pants to match.
Is it just me or are Knowles' reviews truly bizarre?
I know he's a real cheerleader for film, and that's great. But after reading his review of Blade 2, I'm sure not sure what to think of Knowles.
I mean, I'm all for enthusiasm. That's fine. And I know he's somewhat of a celebrity -- he's got a new book out, appeared a couple times with Ebert on Ebert's show -- but his reviews are repulsive in a way that sorta defies any explanation.
But not all his reviews of repulsive. Blade 2 maybe is the oddball. And I'm not sure even why the Blade 2 review bothers me so much. After all, it's sorta the power of the everyman-reviewer-on-the-internet encapsulated.
But there's something sorta off-putting about Knowles. Like he's a bit *too* enthusiastic -- and oftentimes about the weirdest things.
More power to him, I guess. No one is forcing me to read the reviews, right?
I guess they're not really reviews. That's the part that gets me. Maybe I'm taking them too seriously. I just gotta chill, read it, and roll with it. But they sorta expose stuff that sorta makes you scratch your head (or, as Harry might say, your ass) and say, "Hmmmmmm...."
*shrug*
bad About a movie? I have read a number of this guys reviews and they are always the same " OH MY GOD!! THAT MOVIE GAVE ME A STIFFY!!" or "HOLY SH!T THAT MOVIE MAD ME HAVE AN ORGASISM!"
what ever dude. I have always found Movie reviews to be a waste of time. Choose any movie at any time, and look up some reviews for it. Oh my what a surprise you always find good ones (or at least you find a lack of bad ones). This guy is just another cog in the machine, there to churn out "wow this was a good movie" reviews for the RIAA and studios.
I am beyond sick of the crap they try to spoon feed us. Movies should be more like "The brotherhood of the Wolf" at least was decent. To bad it was made in europe and we won't see many others come from over there. Hollywood has become nothing more than the great passifier for the public.
if you want "No More Hiroshimas" then I say "You First. No More Pearl Harbors."
I'm not so sure that it's a matter of people acting like fanboys of the movie, but most of us at Slashdot probably have something riding on Star Wars success. I'm willing to bet most of the people frequenting here have some interest in Sci-Fi. Star Wars has a way of expanding Sci-Fi to a greater audience, provided it doesn't suck. A greater appeal for sci-fi would certainly make a lot of our lives easier. If Star Wars ep 4 hadn't opened the doors to sci-fi, we'd all have to hide in shadows just to watch Doctor Who ;). If Episode II stinks, we won't be able to take our significant others to see the next one, or possibly any other sci-fi movie.
As for the computer industry, Ep2 could give it a serious boost. Digital artists would be more in demand and we may start to see more movies done entirely digital. If this happens, we could see a serious upgrade to theaters aka digital projectors. My hope is that one day movie theaters upgrade to the new projectors, it might mean an increase of frame rate (smoother motion...) is possible, and for viewing on a big screen that'd really be nice. Ep2 could help usher that in, but not if it sucks.
You don't have to be a Star Wars fan to feel the benefit of a good Star Wars movie. I have virtually no interest in seeing this movie, but I do hope for its succees anyway. It could mean a rather lucrative career for me.
"Derp de derp."
This discussion reminds me of David Brin's theory that Anakin "bringing balance to the force" is a means of defeating the two great evils terrorizing the Galaxy: The Sith and The Jedi Order. Essentially, the Jedi are elitist fascists that disrespect the inferior populace as much as the Sith - it's just that they have an attitude of nobliese oblige rather and aspirations of exploitation.
I hope this is developed, because in this context, Darth Vader is a hero - defeating both the Palpatine and Yoda and replacing the corrupt Jedi Order (I wonder if these celibates have as much problems as the Catholic Priesthood?) with something that's a bit more humanistic.
Perhaps in this context the Jedi Science of mitocholorians (sp?) is just another example of their internal corruption - they should be training everyone in the use of the force who show potential, and not attempting to exclude people like young Anakin who was considered too old to begin training.
144l. ph34r my 133t l3g4l 5k1lz!
I can't read the review right now, I guess Slashdot killed the server heh. I just wanted to mention that the effects aren't done yet. If Ep1 was any indication, they'll be working on effects up until 3 weeks before the launch of the movie. If that's the case, then the reviewer likely saw an 'animatic version' of the movie, without everything in place. Normally this would be a good sign, except Lucas is the kind of guy to keep tweaking the movie in post production.
I'll give you an example, long after the principal photography was done, Lucas decided to add a line for C3PO. They had an artist digitally recreate the left side of the picture so it could scroll over to the right, because 3PO wasn't originally in the shot. Then they had to composite C3PO in via bluescreen. All so he could say this very important, plot pivotal line "You'll never get me onto one of those starships."
In other words, Lucas still has time to change it. A tweak here and a tweak there could potentially damage the movie. On the other hand, though, this technique could be used to improve the movie too. Who knows... In any case, as long as the movie has time to evolve, I wouldn't back any reviews of it right now.
"Derp de derp."
$5 / month hosted VPS on linux = awesome!
Check out the Palpatine bio on starwars.com. The relevant quote is: "In the Death Star, high above the Battle of Endor, Luke refused the Emperor's newfound dark side power, and so Palpatine used his deadly Force lightning to attack the young Jedi."
Next are you going to suggest that the Anakin Skywalker from Phantom Menace isn't the same Anakin Skywalker who became Darth Vader?!
I've looked around and so far I can't find anything about this (and I assume this means there's no information, but I thought someone here might have a clue), but does anybody know when advance tickets for episode II will go on sale? Or does it depend on the theater?
visit the hwky website for a lyrical genius infusion.
My guess is that this was orchestrated by the studios to get those 'opinion leaders' disappointed by Ep 1 excited about Ep 2. Most of the nutjobs that talk about movies all day long probably flock to his site and participate in the forums, so they figure a positive review by Harry is good enough to get the word of mouth hype machine moving. Any entry level PR class teaches this tactic to get people talking about a particular issue, starting with the opinion leaders.
There is also a distinct possibility that Harry is in fact on the payroll of the movie makers. We've heard about the studios creating a number of 'fan sites' to build up momentum for various flicks, so we should at least entertain the idea that Harry is a more permanent shadow marketing tactic. In the end a bulk of the ads on his site are from the studios, so they are paying him one way or the other :).
If there was a legititmate 'leaked' version of the film (i.e. not an orchestrated leak), there'd be a VCD traveling throughout the vast expanse of cyberspace this morning. This sort of stuff doesn't happen 'by accident.' George Lucas had to approve this or it wouldn't have happened.
www.lonseidman.com
I waited almost a month to see Star Wars Episode I, and you know what? It still sucked. I'll go see the new one because I am a fan of the series, but I'll allow probably 2 weeks and go to a matinee.
My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.
Dude, you just lost all credibility ;)
A witty saying proves you are wittier than the next guy.
When I went to see Phantom Menace for the second time, my friends I saw the movie with didn't know Palpatine was the Emperor. They were surprised when I mentioned it in passing.
I only knew because I had picked it up through fanboy channels around the time Jedi came out.
Jon Acheson
All opinions expressed herein are my own, and not those of my employers, who are appalled.
and I was convinced that it would be Jar Jar Binks who died and brought Anakin and err Princess whadevver togethor.
You're saying it was his mum? Awwww SHIT!
This guys says he's seen a rough cut of episode 2.
Big deal.
I've seen final cuts of episode 4, 5 and 6!
And guess what? (SPOILER ALERT:) Vador is Luke's father!!
The real quesion is whether or not he liked Episode One. If he thought Episode One was anything but the enormous piece of crap that it was, then his opinion is suspect.
No, not at all. What I'm saying is that it isn't mentioned in the movie, and thus the fact that Palpatine == Emperor would not be obvious to people who don't take their Star Wars experience beyond the movies (which, granted, doesn't include many /.ers, but is quite a few people nonetheless).
The above poster was chastising people for not remembering Return of the Jedi well enough to remember that the Emperor's name was Palpatine, when in fact that's not mentioned in the trilogy.
Harry has seen A LOT of movies. He lives to watch movies. I think this makes him as much an expert on movies as any other film critic out there. His style of reviews is a bit unorthidox, but that does not mean he is a bad reviewer.
Actually, the initial preview copy for investors and market tests has been 'in the can' for over a month. It's not the final cut, but all the effects and scenes are completed, music and voice overs done, and final rough cut made.
As to the review... well, who knows. I don't like the guy much, though he certainly has done me no wrong. I hate it when people bash someone they don't know personally, as alot of you have done today. His review is to kneejerk and possibly full of spoilers if to be believed.
If he saw it, it was probably a cut out for the Lucas company(s) trying to build some hype, which they have done judging from the two or three other early leak reviews on the web today.
After being flown to New York City to see a sneak extravaganza premiere of "Godzilla," Knowles ranted and raved about how it was the greatest thing he'd ever seen.
A week later, he saw it again, on his own dime, and proceeded to trash the hell out of it.
AICN has ZERO integrity. Always had, always will.
By your own admission, he corrected himself. That sure sounds like integrity to me.
-Waldo Jaquith
This is a VERY legitimate point. And more circumstantial evidence that the "leak" of aotc to Harry Knowles was a controlled leak set up by Lucasfilm itself. It's all about hype and PR. At t-minus 2 months and counting, I would expect no less, particularly considering what Lucasfilm has riding on this one.
Harry's been slashdotted bad.
That that is is that that that that is not is not.
My only problem is your inference that if Anakin had been left behind or not become involved in later events, that the whole of the univers would be different. Do you think that Sidious would just stop and fail without Vader? Wouldn't he find another apprentice and go on about his business of conquering the galaxy?
Sure, it would be a major change for the particular people and events of this series of stories, but probably not a big shift in the overall history of the timeline.
I think of Asimov / Harry Seldon and Psychohistory. Small groups of people may affect small events, but the greater line of history has at most a minor perterbation and most likely no real change at all.
I always think of this when I here people talk about how one little thing would change the world. They usually think in terms of "all other things remaining the same, but this little change". It doesn't happen that way. If you change one thing, then everyone around it is also changed and adjusts to the new situation, and then persues it on new terms.
There is nothing so silly as other peoples traditions, and nothing so sacred as our own.
He makes an appearance (if you believe mainstream press), but only in a limited fashion.
I have been to a dozen theaters in NJ and NY, and most of them in Central Illinois. To date I have only set foot in two that have digital projection and sound systems... most are film and analog sound... hell, most that show the THX or Dolby Digital opening film to ID their theater as being compliant are far from it, especially in NY.
Try again bung hole.
A general rule of thumb is, if you are too big af a baby to put you login by your comment, then you should stay out of the adult's conversations.
"Da ist ein Technölüst in mein Unterpanten!"
According to this.
Would he lie on TV? Would he tell this story on TV (in fear of Lucasfilm/Fox)? Hrm.
proton != antielectron
He was just on CNN Headline news (blurb). He is sticking it out there big time now, so I doubt he's lying.
Whats the source? I ask because it is unsigned and un-referenced and is compiled by some guy just "Lucky enough" to have a copy of the film slip into his lap? BULLSHIT! It sounds awfully like a bit of Internet PR leading up to the films release, right down to the very obvious give aways like "The film is a little rough right now..." or refering to Lucas as a "...flanel wearing toy salesman..." intended to make it sound lagitimate and making it appeal to the disgruntled fans which they need to turn up on day one to make up door sales. They even go to the point of analysing the fan base (comments about how the audience has polarised into the faithful and the betrayed). All of this seems so deliberately put together, like some marketing executive had surveyed a bunch of people, figured out how they felt about the first film, then put together this document, anonymously releasing it on the internet for us to pick up, interpret as some form of "underground release", and change our minds about attendance. I remember on "The Panel" (Great Australian talkback show) once when they were talking about those little film review snippets which come witht he advertising. Like for instance, Sony quoting reviewers which dont exist! This guy isnt an independant reviewer, he's a marketing executive stooge spreading pre-release propaganda. If you want a real review, wait for the sources you can trust, and ignore what was presented here.
I mean it this guy sounds like Lucas Arts damage contol for Phantom Menice. Attavk of the Clones my rule but the fact of the matter is that this is a unconfirmed pre-review. They release a "leak" to hype up attack of the Clones so that the box office sales aren't hurting because of Phantom menice. This wouldn't be below lucas arts.
What I really want to know is where I can find the bootlegged copy of the screening, I know its out there somewhere...
The only way Lucas could redeem the series at this point is if Boba Fett freezes then accidently drops and shatters Jar Jar into a million pieces.
When I read this review, I screamed like a little girl. I mean it was like Uncle Tony grabbed my pantied ass. I jumped about 12 feet up in the air and squealed.
"Reactionaries must be deprived of the right to voice their opinions; only the people have that right." - Mao
"For me to review BLADE 2, it is a major conflict of interest, because Guillermo Del Toro and I are brothers. His father says so. His wife believes this. Guillermo and I are just the best of friends, but when El Gordo calls my father Dad, and I call his Dad "Pops" and we delve into hours of passionate discussion about H.P. Lovecraft, Goya, Steve Ditko action, the movies and pussy... We can lose all track of time on planet Earth.
But having attended the World Premiere of BLADE 2 last night, one inescapable thought crossed my mind during the movie. 10 to 1.... I believe Guillermo Del Toro eats pussy better than any man alive.
Watch his 'HOUSE OF PAIN' sequence in BLADE 2. BLADE 2 is the tongue, mouth, fingers and lips of a lover. The Audience is the clit. Watch your audience. This is where Guillermo Del Toro goes down on the audience. It starts with long licks with a nose bump on the joy button slowly. He smiles as he does this... Watching the audience begin to squirm, then he takes the audiences' clit in his mouth and just licks it like crazy, the audience is ready, on that precipice, then calm. He backs off... long licks again, brings in a finger to massage a bit, licks from the bottom to the top... The audience is cooing... He has them, they want release. He acts like he's going to give it to you, takes you right to the edge, the audiences' backs arched, ready to cum.... Backs off pinching the nipples just so, his head bobbing up to say, "You like?" The audience shifts around needing release, he builds again... The pressure at a near boiling point... Each stroke and moment a hypersensitive place... Two fingers to the sweet spot, the audience is there... right there at that point... suddenly he's relentless taking the audience through a rampage of orgasms... trying to get away, trying to escape... back back back, but he has you, and he's never going to let you forget this moment, the audience was electric... Frenetically frothing... Guillermo hears them begging no more, when he decides to stop for a moment, there is that relaxed calm... The audience relaxes... labored breathing... a sated smile, WHEN SUDDENLY THE RELENTLESS BASTARD IS AT IT AGAIN!!!! You begin laughing, trying to push him away, but no... more pleasure, more joy, more fun... You can't handle it, you start giggling and screaming... And it goes like this for quite some time, till at the end... The credits roll, the theater lights come up... You look at the screen, you realize you want that tongue again... You want that feeling again, and you watch it again and again, because damn he respects the clit!
Ok, maybe I take the metaphor too far... maybe... But I had two girls around me, Patch black and blued my right forearm with slaps and rabbit punches as though Guillermo was pounding the short hairs, and Saffron (not Vegas') gripping my shoulder from behind like frickin Spock, leaning up to my ear to say, "You didn't tell me this was pornography!!!!" To which I grab her hand, sniffed her fingers and said, "MMMm you're fingers are wet... enjoy!"
Now you might feel all of this is inappropriate behavior on my part, but folks, at the Q&A afterwards, the second question came from a woman on the front row that asked Del Toro "Could you comment on the vaginal influence of the Reapers?"
Guillermo looked like the wet chinned thigh splitter that he is and said, "You have to understand Make Up artists, they never get any pussy, so they are always creating it!"
ZACTLY!
Now lest you think this film is merely pornographic, and you seemingly are living in the delusion that that is a bad thing... It is not. Guillermo likes to pretend this movie is just there to make you go, "Whoa," but only a blind man can't see Guillermo at work here.
BLADE 2 is from Goya's Black period. Look at the palette, the brutal primalness of the Reapers.. The sparing use of color... There is sadness amongst the orgasms in this film. There is a solemn pathetic nature to the emaciated monsters of the Reapers... A melancholy to the movie at its quiet moments. When you see the Reaper that Kris' WHISTLER catches... "Like a coyote he's been gnawing away at his arm to get away." There is just a captivating, can't look away, nature of the dead, the dying and the diseased, and Guillermo understands that morbidity. You can see it in his film here.
His mounds of skulls in the sewers of Prague are not pure bones, there's rancid strings of something so icky and nasty that my eyes did not define it. The film revels in the Grand Guignol of it all, and does it all with a smile.
A smile.
That reminds me. Many people will wonder why Del Toro's BLADE is so much more appealing than the original, and the reason is Del Toro gets Wesley to smile... and for a bit, he takes off his glasses and we see his eyes... He strips away a bit of his cool stoic manliness and lets a bit of that kid in the cookie jar joy of naughtiness out. The result is absolutely captivating.
Ron Perlman... When Ron and Guillermo get together, there is a magic to the scenes. Go check out CRONOS, watch Ron's vain nose obsessed bad guy. Watch how utterly delicious those scenes are with Ron. Absolutely magic. Here... Here Ron comes off looking, sounding and being just that badass you love. Reinhardt is a glorious bastard in this film. Just a fantastic ass of a man. After the film, Ron took the stage with Guillermo... He was dressed with a cool black leather jacket and a B.P.R.D. t-shirt... HELLBOY. My god folks... Having read Guillermo's HELLBOY script... It is 100% Guillermo Del Toro and folks as cool as BLADE 2 is... BLADE 2 was a teaser... It was just pussylicking.... HELLBOY is deep dicking!
The difference between BLADE 2 and most sequels that you see is that Guillermo wasn't interested in making a sequel to BLADE. He wanted to make a vampire that you could be afraid of again. Not some guy with extended canines, but something you would run in mortal fear of. He wanted to create a swallower of souls... something from the inky black parts of your mind. Something new.
BLADE has subtle romance... platonic bonds... machismo posturing... and just an insane amount of ass-kicking. I hope Sam Raimi can top this with SPIDER-MAN, but can Tobey Maguire be more cool than Wesley Snipes? Does that Green Goblin costume allow for the actor to perform and improv and connect with his audience the way that Perlman does here... Or the Reapers? Then there is the fact that this is 100% R-rated... unapologetically.
Hope you enjoy Guillermo Del Toro's tongu... I mean BLADE 2, you'll be back for seconds."
I'm a regular reader of AICN, and have a lot of respect for Harry.
I also have no doubt that Harry has genuinely seen the film.
What gets me is the timing of this. There's plenty of postings here about what Lucas gains out of this scoop, but what about Harry?
Anyone noticed that he's just released his first book? And is right now travelling the world promoting it? He even mentions talking more about the film at one of his book signings in the PS of his review.
The timing of this scoop seems very convenient for Harry.
(from his THE PHANTOM MENACE review):
"Mesa Luved Him!"