Slashdot Mirror
Got Evil? Buy it Here!
Saint Aardvark writes "I just came across VillainSupply.com, and I'm sold. From Doomsday Devices to Robotic Tigers to Randroids, these guys have got it all. Don't forget the convenient, accessible self-destruct device!"
ARMORED LUXURY CRUISE SHIP W/ STEALTH TECHNOLOGY
Price: Starts at US$3,700,000,000.
yeah, i smell a new austin powers moving coming out...
Runnin' On Empty
but this has to be the most worthless story i've seen on slashdot in months....
"Champagne for my real friends - and real pain for my sham friends!" http://ericblade.postalboard.com/
Damn! Now there will be villianous competition.
I give them two weeks until some humorless secret service agent sends a threatening letter to their ISP.
Alric.
To Elbereth...
Damn it, none of the links would work in the henchjobs section. That sucks. Just when I got used to entering my resume online to all this recruitment agencies.
I am a rocket scientist you know.
"I just can't sit while people are saying nonsense in a meeting without saying it's nonsense" J Watson, Sci Am 288:(4)51
www.findanddestroy.com used to be a store who sold such items as, "Shut That Bitch Up Duct Tape" and "Hide That Body Quick Broom Closets"
This compares with the 20th Century castles site, which also has this item that would make a good lair.
and which is a real item
"It is a greater offense to steal men's labor, than their clothes"
I was hoping to order an Emporer Zurg action figure.
If you got a $100 bill, put your hands up...
Ok, maybe slashdot shoulf offer to lend people bandwidth if they link them. Seems like it only takes moments for a small page to go down.
the "convenient, accessible self-destruct device". But do they have the murder device with the "unnecessarily slow dipping mechanism"?
General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.
and my first thought was the next version of Windows was released
Jesus saves souls and redeems them for valuable cash prizes
This reallly got my hopes up, I was expecting like a spy gadget store. Then I get a disclaimer that says it's owned partly by nazis and the carts are offline because 'heros' blew up their base.
Is it April 1 again?
"Oh no, 3 horny women and only 2 condoms...Thank god I read slashdot"
Where's the "convenient self destruct button" at?
Kids these days. They don't know the difference between classic, and just plain old.
and / or home depot and wal mart.
sometimes target, but usually they have too many nice things, so thats where i buy my gifts for friends.
By Amazon.com for sure. They're the only working links to their sight. Clever. How much did they pay Slashdot for this?
www.villainsupply.com is owned and operated by Global Domination LLC, a consortium of organizations devoted to the consolidation of global capital by a single cabal or individual. Member organizations include The Trilateral Commission, The Bilderberger Group, Alternative 3, The World Zionist Conspiracy, VilAnon, The International Union of Mad Scientists, Majestic-12, World Freemasonry, SMERSH/The Second Soviet, Switzerland, The Arctic Nazis, The Hellfire Club, Price/Waterhouse/Coopers, Sanrio, Archer/Daniels/Midland, Dr. DeSpayr, The U.S. Military-Industrial Complex, and Amway.
I think they forgot the The great and sinister VA "Software" keiretsu.
Yet another reason why we should remove warning labels from all products, and let idiocy solve itself.
Kids these days. They don't know the difference between classic, and just plain old.
The unnessesarily slow dipping device? Or Fembots? I could use an army of them...
Just because you can mod me down, doesn't mean you're right. Shoes for industry!
Those are the slashbots that are always carrying on about how the world should work like Ayn Rand said it should, right? :)
Not to say that I didn't like The Fountainhead; I'm just not sure if I want to live my life in a similar vein, or live amongst people who are doing so.
Your right to not believe: Americans United for Separation of Church and
A man interrupts a priest who is saying mass in a private chapel and ejaculates into the chalice. He then has a prostitute frig the priest into the chalice. Subsequently he forces the priest to drink from the chalice.
but do they have a psychotic arm for my former nazi scientist?
The video card, in little effort. If you can manage the Command Line Interface. Even though I know about interfacing with the keyboard that make us more adaptable or if you can think of expression you are going to a waste of Gid awful personal web pages on the "unnecessarily slow dipping Damn!
Now there a threatening letter to be able to the video card, in is minimal. Though I don't think about, the henchjobs section. That sucks.
Just when I need intuitive, I don't see one of expression you get a self-configuring, decentralized wireless network... He points to the "unnecessarily slow dipping mechanism"?
--
Ask the Ya-Hoot Oracle Anything!
That convenient self-destruct device into their webserver.
Black and grey are both shades of white.
I never understood these comments. Do you not have a brain? Look at how many stories have been posted today and decide for yourself.
Perhaps a pre-recorded evil laughing device.
I find MUUUUAAAAHHAAAHHAAAAHAHAHAHA! can be very taxing on the voicebox after a few hours.
"Evil laugh augmentation device. Pat Pend"
Don't forget the convenient, accessible self-destruct device!"
What for their server? Why is that good?
We're a sorry bunch, but for a site to get /.ed at roughly midnight on a Friday night is pretty sad!
I mean, I'm stuck at home running an animation rendering, so, um, I have an excuse. But what about the rest of you!
I think some slashdotter found their "convenient, accessible self-destruct device". Or maybe we all did.
.
The ultimate villain: a slashdotting
Come on, we all employ a doomsday device on a daily basis.
It's called The Slashdot Effect.
Is it just me or did you just pretty much copy and paste random comments from above?
Saying Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders.
> "...until his own mother's vagina comes to devour him with sticky pointy teeth."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHGGGG!!!
We really need your help
http://www.gofundme.com/help-sherry
Boss: Ahh, the time is at hand. We have but a few minutes while the satellites are perfectly alinged with the moon to form our Death Ray. Alert our forces and the send the fire command!!
Henchman: Sir, we can't access the central server!
Boss: What has happened? Did a government spy infiltrate us and take our the control room?
Henchman: I don't think so sir...
Boss: Was our facility taken over by a crack military team that has cut power to the mainframe?
Henchman: Uhhh.. Not exactly
Boss: Did a team of elite crackers break in at the last minute and upload a virus?
Henchman: Closer...
Boss: Well what is it?
Henchman: It's the slashdot effect! All our communications have ground to a halt, our enviromental controls are turning our headquarters into an inferno and our satellites are going to crash into our island!
Boss: Arrghh!! Foiled Again! Escape to our nuclear submarine!
Henchman: Um sir.. remember a few months ago how you wanted us to installed Windows on the sub...
BOOM!!!
I stole this Sig
Somebody tripped the self-destructo on their website!
Whoops!!!
"A terrorist is someone who has a bomb but doesn't have an air force." -William Blum
But i want an Adrian Barbeaubot
"I would say that 99 per cent of what my father has written about his own life is false." - L. Ron Hubbard Jr.
For ONE...MILLION...DOLLARS!
Maybe some mittens, its frickin feezing in here...
that is stuff that matters
This one is nice too.
"Would it kill you to put down the toilet seat?" -- Maya Angelou
Have you considered google. Pick some words from the title or the story, pop them in google, post the links with some fluff about how these are the best sites for further research.
I'll take 10% of the karma as my payment for this idea.
Where's the 'instant slashdotting'? That's the ultimate in evil. Oh wait, they got hit by it themselves...
using namespace slashdot;
troll::post();
The super-villian is not 100% evil, he's got the brains to make all these amazing world-destroying devices, powerful computers, wonderful transportation devices.
:-(
The 100% evil people are the ones who haven't quite got the brains. They make crappy computers, pathic transportation devices, not quite soul-destroying robots and then, and this is the evil bit, they persuade us to turn over our hard-earned cash and use them on ourselves
Mmmmmmm
Nobody seems to have mentioned their "in association with evil amazon.com" button! Clearly these are evil villains with a sense of humour!
Video Game cheats, hints a
Look at the topic it's posted under and consider the time it was posted.
You can set stories under this topic not to appear if they bother you so much, asshole.
What kind of an "evil supplies" store doesn't sell weather machines or germ warfare labs? You'd think they'd at least stock business hammocks.
How do you get funding for something like that anyway? I mean, that's some serious inventory they're sitting on.
It's probably secretly owned by Bill Gates. He's 1. Got enough money to do it, and 2. Evil!
-m
http://www.invisik.com
Once I get it going, I'm going to GPL my efforts so all can have it! Just imagine: /. will contain nothing but Karma-bots and stupid Macintosh users who argue with them.
And this is different from the present in what way?
What really gets me is that he paid less for the place than a typical house where I live, in Silicon Valley.
I love the humour there. I think it must have been make by Brits, as some of the pictures are
from 70s brit sci-fi that americans probably
wouldn't get. Did you spot, Kerr Avon, Zoltan and
the federation guard uniform from Blakes seven and
the Giant robot from Doctor who?
.....Palistian fundimentalist supermarket.
Table-ized A.I.
"You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have sharks with freakin laser beams attached to thier heads. Now evidently my cycloptic colleague informs me that that can't be done."
Don't make me pull rank, as I sit on the toilette...
I am the nightmare of nightmares.
"Unnecessarily slow dripping mechanisms"? Bah!
Every serious Evil Overlord has long ago forsaken them in favour of things much more practical.
Plus, not only will your World Domination plans be more effective, they'll be cheaper too.
:)
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Very Original
The top 4 most evil people they have listed:
Read Bujold. Free (as in
I'll take my nuke mail-orders elsewher, thank you!
Join the elite! Post at score:2! Ghostwheel is online.
In a related link, check out Evil People... Supplying you with all your Evil connections.
:P
He uses a lot of Flash and Shockwave too... I guess people who say Flash is the devil are right!
"PC Load Letter? What the $@#% does that mean?!"
yeah just came across... you stole it from FARK.COM... bastard
The Robotic Ayn Rand: the Randroid. The disclaimers are hysterical.
I think there's a typo. Actually it should read:i els
Price/Waterhouse/Coopers/Sanrio/Archer/Dan
Never Smile.
it's so delicously evil
Zod knew that his rightful place on this planet Houston (known to some as "Earth"), was to be ruler. Zod eventually made his way back to Superman's Crystal Palace and was able to restore his own super powers. And now that Superman is in a wheelchair (which Zod swears he had NOTHING to do with), there is no longer anyone on this planet left to oppose him.
So Zod is now assuming his position as your rightful leader.
You have two choices:
1. Take his hand and swear eternal loyalty to Zod.
2. Perish for your defiance.
The choice is obvious. KNEEL BEFORE ZOD. Truth. Justice. Zod.
http://www.generalzod.net/
--- Learn XForms today: http://xformsinstitute.com
So, this thing is one giant redirect for amazon sales, huh?
If only spammers would get this creative.
Kudos to this guy. We need more like him.
Any sufficiently well-organized Government is indistinguishable from bullshit.
A pet store where you can buy some frickin' sharks with lasers on their forehead. Or at least some ill tempered bass with the lasers. Or a clone 1/8th your size.
"It takes many nails to build a crib, but one screw to fill it."
Those silly gooses! There the ones that we (Gay/Lesbian world domiation & SM club) bought our HomoRay8000a from. It's your standard MindRay6000 with a 12 inch purple control rod crystal inplace of the standard 5 inch. Once that cute guy (the one with the yumy blue eyes) gets done hooking it up, and we finish testing it (on him) we'll be able to make every man in the world "change teams".
Yes, every police man (clad only in leather jock strap, gun belt, and motorcyle boots) will give and recive head at all traffic stops. Football will be played as it was ment, nude. The Marine Corp. will be filled with screaming bottoms, oh right, it already is.
Of couse it would happen so much faster if the Jews would sell us their mind control satalite network. Of all the nerve! they won't sell it out right, they want us to lease it form them.
"You can see I know very little about pimp policy." George McGovern.
The one real one in existence - GWB - has already been bought by MS and the oil companies.
Blofeld: 20. Your move, Mr. Bond.
Bond: I'll take a hit, dealer. [Homer gives him a card]
Joker! You were supposed to take those out of the deck.
Homer: Oh, sorry. Here's another one.
Bond: What's this card? "Rules for Draw and Stud Poker"?
Blofeld: What a pity, Mr. Bond.
[Odd Job and Jaws grab Bond and drag him out]
Bond: But...but it's Homer's fault! I didn't lose. I never lose!
Well, at least tell me the details of your plot for world
domination.
Saint Aardvark writes "I just came across VillainSupply.com, and I'm sold.
Robotic Tiger pricetag: $1.2 billion, batteries not included.
You're sold? *scratches head*
Bill, you're not welcome on slashdot. We don't even like your operating system.
Shoo.
Blearf. Blearf, I say.
For me, a person with an ideology cannot be pure evil.
Such people has targets for their missions, they're trying to make the world better by doing stuff.
Pure evil is one who destroys for the fun of it, for the joy of control. Thus Hank Scropio is my pick. Also the party from 1984.
Bill Gates Has No Penis.
Home Despot
If anyone's going to take over the world, It'll be her.
Flooding the world just got easier with the Polar Ice Cap De-Icer, new from the folks
at Union Carbide of India LLC. Just place this 200' heating tower at either of the Earth's
poles, and set it on "High." In days, the Dutch will be up to their sinsemilla in seawater.
To save the Earth, just set it on "Cool" -- but don't leave it on too long,
or the Earth's oceans will freeze solid!
Price: US$12,999,999,999.49 (save $0.50!)
http://www.villainsupply.com/superweapons.html
see, if the roman catholic church wanted to REALLY get the dough, the could sell their goodness online. they are just not utilizing the new market place!
QED
BSD is for people who love UNIX. Linux is for those who hate Microsoft.
its cooler than www.superweapons.com, but at least mine isn't slashdotted :)
slashdot: where everyone yells sarcastic metaphors to themselves to understand the issue
We are all safe from evil. The shopping cart is off-line. GW has once again made the world safe from evil doers...
What is pirate software? Software for inventory of stolen treasure?
It's funny to see a Swiss bank account as accepted payment method *LOL*
;-).
My tip for villains out there: Your money is better hidden when invested in a herd of camels in Nigeria, some healthy slaves, a fine harem, terror organizations, diamond mines, spammers in Taiwan, US sex sites, casinos in Las Vegas, a bureau of scrupulous US lawyers, famous sport teams, Argentinian officials, a couple of paypal accounts, russian vodka, chinese comunist party leaders, Britney Spears posters or Hollywood studios to mention a few. Another fine investment: invest 1/100th of your e(vil)-wealth in a dotcom-startup (important: needs to be still breathing), tell them they can use it to party all the time and see the value of your 99/100th in put options grow exponentially
In general: Your money goes well where the chaos and corruption is.
Needless to say you should avoid doing villain business in Switzerland! That country is just too small and too well organized for evil business and hiding. That may be hard to digest for the Swiss banks, but that's the way it is nowadays.
you trolls need to come up with some better trolling ideas
What about Tony SoprAno...
Oh damn, they don't have any fully operational battle stations the size of a small moon in stock right now. Had there been any, I might've ordered one - maybe even two in case those pesky rebels start making trouble.
They REFUSED to give me a refund on a defective doomsday device!!!!!
I think I know the friend in question. B-)
Bantam Dominique roosters crow a four-note song. Once you've heard it as "Happy BIRTHday" you can't NOT hear it that way
I see they have antimatter at $450,000,000.00 per liter. Such a deal! And only 12 liters could destroy the entire planet!
Maybe I can afford a microliter or so and use it to power a really powerful potato gun?
Every time I make an order, they say they're out of stock. Apparently some guy in Redmond, WA has cleared out their stock!
Insert simplistic political, ideological, or personal proselytization here.
It's funny
It was funny until I hit all the left-wing propaganda. (Notice that lampooning of domestic "villians" was limitied to businesmen, conservatives, libertarians, Republican political officials, and Objectivists.)
A pity, too. Just about the only known way to get a true psychopath to reform is to introduce him to Objectivism - a philosophy that shows him what's in it for him to be good (or at least to be honest and avoid hitting first) and gives him an acceptable ruleset to live by. Lampooning Objectivists makes it harder to convince psychopaths to take it up.
But I suppose doing some real evil helps them to live up to their billing.
Bantam Dominique roosters crow a four-note song. Once you've heard it as "Happy BIRTHday" you can't NOT hear it that way
"****requires two specially-trained gay German technicians"
:)
Any poke at Sigfried and Roy gets 5 stars in my book
The Amazon donation page is broken - my donation of ONE MEELION DOLLARS is not showing up, however I'm in the list to be an overseer! Dont worry - I'll have perks for fellow slashdotters.
"Thank you for supporting the WORLD DOMINATION FUND. Your information has been added to our global database. Out of those who chose to donate to our cause, 10,000 will be randomly selected to serve as SLAVE OVERSEERS rather than as slaves once our cabal is victorious over the forces of "Good." Remember, the more you donate, the better your chances! And remember to visit www.villainsupply.com for all your villainy needs! -- Dr. DeSpayr, interim CFO, The Global Domination Consortium LLC"
Kewl!
this account has posted 3 comments to 3 stories, and they all say exactly the same thing. So thanks for modding up a troll.
You mustn't forget The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord.
Things like number 50: My main computers will have their own special operating system that will be completely incompatible with standard IBM and Macintosh powerbooks.
- grunby
Nope for me it's the people with ideology who are evil...
Indeed, that's the basis for my ideology. I firmly believe that all those people who firmly believe that certain people should be killed should be killed.
Anyway, #3 on the list (BG) also has an ideology: the pursuit of more money is the highest good.
You misunderstand and misrepresent Rand's philosophy. You are welcome to to chose to despise what it actually is. But it is a mistake to believe a lie about it, then despise what you believe it to be.
"Altruism robs a man's soul" is an accurate description of part of it. But she goes on to describe in excruciating detail exactly HOW altruism robs a man's (or woman's) soul, reducing them to poverty and misery. You may not agree with her. But her analysis had the Soviet Union pegged dead-on, and described the form of its eventual collapse when it was still in its infancy. It also accurately described the "cycle of poverty" and "political correctness" when the socialist experiments of the west were just beginning.
On the other hand, claiming she advocated "If you want something, take it" is a flat-out lie. What she actually advocated is "If you want something that belongs to someone else, you may NOT just take it. To get it you must get him to trade it to you voluntarily, without using force, lies, or threats."
So yes, I believe it is a good thing to not have 'psychopaths' living for themselves, despising the concept of helping others and just running around taking what is 'theirs'.
I, on the other hand, believe it is good to have them:
making things of value,
advertising them honestly,
selling them to interested buyers,
honoring contracts, and
settling disputes through arbratation or the legal system
and bad to have them:
robbing,
killing,
raping,
bashing all who "dis" them, and
doing anything else that gives them a moment of satisfaction.
.
Rand's philosoply gives them a believable argument that the former will make them happier.
Since the defining characteristic of a psychopath is that he IS totally selfish, don't you think a philosophy that tells him "a smart selfish person will be honest and hard working because it will make him happy" is a desirable thing?
. . . .
And as I expected, my previous post was moderated down. Does anyone honestly believe that occurred because it really didn't rate, and not because some leftists will use moderator points to bash any posting that calls attention to left-wing political bias or propaganda?
Let's see how this posting does. B-)
Bantam Dominique roosters crow a four-note song. Once you've heard it as "Happy BIRTHday" you can't NOT hear it that way
Just ask Wile E. Coyote.
Pretty scary that it's really happened.
3 81 91,00.html
http://www.wired.com/news/infostructure/0,1377,
This company is giving away copies of this software in a "banner-exchange program."
Why pay $399??
Go to the following page for details:
http://www.uts.com/free_software.html
Ok, you buy neat toys there, but where are you going to go for practical advice when you want to enslave the world? Captain Electro is sharing his wizdom at The Electro Archive"
Anarchists never rule
You just solved one of the biggest mysteries od our time.
I always look at windows, wonder "Why would they move where something goes, Why does half the self seem contradictory and not make sense?, Why would they change what something is called, when everybody knows it by the old name?"
Its because Ayn Rand is there specifications writer!
Also interisting, when we live in a world where windows are for looking at, not out.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Go to Google and type in: related:http://www.villainsupply.com Look at the last entry... Microsoft!