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l33tspeak For Parents By Microsoft
An anonymous reader writes "Microsoft has published A parent's primer to computer slang where !337$p34k is explained to the uninitiated. Expect to see a l33t-localized version of Windows XP soon." They also have a wonderful guide to the tactics of a griefer. "Honey, we're getting worried that you may be 0wning newbz. We need to talk..."
In soviet russia |\|3wb5 pwn j00
There exists some positive integer N that you are the Nth person to read this signature.
I clicked yes at the bottom: Y0UR 51ght I5 d@ 8OM8, M1CR05OFt Own5 l1NuX
God spoke to me.
Can you imagine the author, trying to keep a straight face? Poor guy, he wrote it so professionally
No.
"Thank you for telling us about your experience. Why was the article not useful?"
Other.
"Please tell us more".
It was written by L4M3 D00DZ!!!1!
"Thank you for taking the time to provide feedback."
Advice: on VPS providers
Ok, now try translating the following sentence:
M1cr0$0f7 us35 l33t sploitz and m4d sk1llz to pwn $0ftw4r3 p4t3nts.
Now I can show Pure Pwnage to my parents and they will understand it perfectly. However, they may be concerned that teh_pwnerer is "involved in the theft of intellectual property, particularly licensed software" due to his use of expressions like "pwn."
For more information, click here.
Rules of grammar are rarely obeyed. Many leetspeekers will capitalize every letter except for vowels (LiKe THiS) and otherwise reject conventional English style and grammar.
Kinda reminds me of Slashdot
I am so ....I can't describe the feeling...
It's the first time I click "YES" at the question "Was this information useful" on a Microsoft web page.
"Leet words possibly indicating illegal activity: "warez" or "w4r3z": Illegally copied software available for download. "h4x": Read as "hacks," or what a computer hacker does. "sploitz" (short for exploits): Vulnerabilities in computer software used by hackers. "pwn": A typo-deliberate version of own, a slang term that means to dominate. This could also be spelled "0\/\/n3d" or "pwn3d," among other variations. Online video game bullies or "griefers" often use this term." I have never heard of sploitz, but its pretty obvious that M$ was trying to plug anti-piracy in the comment on part about Warez. Interesting that they didn't mention the term "p0rn". Any parents looking to learn leet should find guides from stuff like the Jargon File (http://jargon.watson-net.com/section.asp?f=cracke rs.html), not learn from Microsoft.
1'|) |_0\/3 70 533 |_337 |_0(4|_153|) 53771|\|G5 |=0|2 05s... That'll be the day, when my peers understand l337.
I don't not believe there isn't a God.
At least they defined my favorite l33t w0rd. Otherwise TFA editors would have gotten spammed by me and t3h l33t p0l1c3!!1!
You can hold down the "B" button for continuous firing.
...he signs his email "l33t h4x0r" ...she makes more weekly on "w4r3z" than you make at a real job. ...his friend call him "Juarez". ...he wants to name your new born child "Fsck r0x0rs"
Tip your waitresses, I'll be here all day. Tip me and I leave pronto.
In WoW you cant chat between factions, but you can use leet speek using numbers and other non-characters.
/uts Hi and it will translate it into [-]:1 uses ":" for uppercase and "." for lowercase. It also supports morse code.
Theres a plugin called "Universal Translator" so you can now type
Not exactly the normal leet speak with letters, but it comes in handy in game.
I've also seen this type of leet speak mix with hex as simple way to send chat in IRC and others wont be able to understand the garbage.
The only one I dont get is "pwned", that just looks stupid.
l337 has so many variations anyway it's almost pointless trying to learn specific terms, you gotta learn the entire language :P
I don't not believe there isn't a God.
I just was reading it and then refeshed the page, I now get "We're sorry, but there is no Microsoft.com Web page that matches your entry"
Did Microsoft just find out about the page and decide that it was a little odd?
redune.com: The World 3.2 Megapixels at a time
Where are teh Funny points? That was definitely not by a l4m3 d00dz0r. I think it's a d00z33 actually.
You can hold down the "B" button for continuous firing.
b) Acapulco Gold
c) Purple Haze
d) Maui Wowie
i'm sending this to my m0m
well, not sending so much as printing it out and running it up to her (because i live in her basement)
did you find the information useful? no "what is the pr0n my son keeps talking about?" i need to know!
These matters should be handled through DRM and draconian laws.
Read the whitepaper.
"Apparently so, but suppose you throw a coin enough times. Suppose one day, it lands on its edge."
This just goes to show that something really *is* completely uncool when Microsoft is writing guides to it.
TRHOnline - Staggering Towards Brilliance
Seriously, I've seen some awfully lame attempts at describing online chat slang.
p g,2,00.asp, where they include 'kiss' as 'keep it simple stupid'. Have you ever seen anyone actually use that in chat?
"It's important to remember that the leetspeek community encourages new forms and awards individual creativity, resulting in a dynamic written language that eludes conformity or consistency."
It's like they actually kinda get it.
Compared to, say, http://www.pcworld.com/howto/article/0,aid,88686,
fysbigtbabn = Fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy night
Yeah right.
--
http://www.stevex.org/longtail
pwnz teh m1cr0s0f7z0rz!!!!!!!!
There's nothing on Google about any l33t-localised version of Windows.
Sincerely,
Pan Tarhei Hosé, PhD.
"Homo sum et cogito ergo odi profanum vulgus et libido."
l37z 5u3 th3|\/| u|\|d3r t3h D.|\/|.(.4.!
Slashdot - Mutual Assured Discussion
I notice they used the term 'glitch' instead of 'bug'. I've also noticed that in the gaming community 'bugged' is also used in place of 'buggy'.
It's 10 PM. Do you know if you're un-American?
Micro$oft
Because nobody writes "p0rn" d00d!!!! It's pr0n.
Combines the misspelling rule (teh = the) with the replace a number for a letter rule.
this has to be the fisrst time amost everone who has commented RTFA. OMG they need to have one that explains abbr. cu'z it r0x.
i will STFU now.
I'm just not very sure about how they expect this information to be used. Do they think that Johnny will go crying to his parents about griefing, and this will clue them in to the problem? I don't really see children complaining to their parents about something that they in many ways sees as THEIR domain, exclusive of parents.
One thing I thought was missing was some ideas for parents of griefers themselves. How do you know your kid is griefing? What do you say to your child when you find out he is a full-time griefer?
It is so simple: by creating a 1337 d1x10n4r33, Microsoft attempts to ensure that 1337$p34k becomes totally unkewl. The best way to get a teen to drop his obsessive stupid behaviour is by legitimising it. W4y 2 go, Micr0$0pht!!!111!?@#*!!
When I was 12, I saw a Gallagher comedy sketch where he proposed that you should be able to shoot little suction darts with a sign saying "Stupid" at cars when the driver does something dumb. That way, everyone will know who the stupid drivers are.
Could a similar system work online? Maybe everyone gets 5-10 "abuse" tags each year. They can hand them out whenever they feel its appropriate.
The top abusers could get dealt with in a number of ways: a big "ABUSER" sign, weapon/equipment/movement limitations, account termination (sadly... probably for a refund), server move, etc.
Of course, you can tweak the number of tags and other parameters. Maybe you can only give one "abuse" tag to an individual every month (stops people from using all their tags on one person).
"It's important to remember that the leetspeek community encourages new forms and awards individual creativity, resulting in a dynamic written language that eludes conformity or consistency" Oh god, they've turned 1337 into a corporate buzzword. I can see it now: 'M1cr050f7 1337: Promoting an individual creative environment that eludes conformity'.
There are 2 types of people in the world, those who find that stupid binary joke funny, and those who don't.
PBS' documentary on American language. It is going to get worse with these slangs. :(
Ant(Dude) @ Quality Foraged Links (AQFL.net) & The Ant Farm (antfarm.ma.cx / antfarm.home.dhs.org).
Microsoft.com didn't get slashdotted? Damn, these Windows servers can take more than I've expected.
The hip way to get your IP. No ads, ever.
Because it's "pr0n" and they probably couldn't find any examples on MSN.
You are being MICROattacked, from various angles, in a SOFT manner.
I was horribly confused in Q3A when players were saying 'LMAO'. I thought it was some 733t code for 'lamer'. Turns out it means Laughing My Ass Off.
:-)
And we expect peace in the middle east? We can't even get q3a players to communicate properly.
"No matter where you go, there you are." -- Buckaroo Banzai
Bruce
"l33tspeak" was never cool, is not "elite" and isn't spoken.
Retarded, yes. Or about like pig-latin as an amusement for children.
You should not be aiming this article at the parents. For one, most parents have got no idea about compters or computer games. It should be aimed at gamers. I do agree at 'griefers' are an annoyance for all gamers, so what you should be trying to do is teach gamers how to deal with them, or they will most probably want to start griefing themselves as a revenge tactic. By all means inform the parents, but aim the extent of the article to gamers.
Doesn't this just serve to legitimize leetspeak as a form of communication? Kids today are already getting flunked out of their English classes for typing their papers the same way they text message their friends, with "u" and "r" instead of "you" and "are".
Parents don't really need a guide to leetspeak - all they really need is to tell their kids that the more leet you try to be, the more ass you actually suck.
1 p0wn3d u: In the contest of skills that we just completed, I found myself victorious. Although this victory has no real meaning, I like to fantisize that if I went to the pubs and told a woman about it, she would shag me. If only I was old enough to go to the pubs...
Well, I feel old now...all these elite hackers owning me, and knowing far more ASCII than I do. Some people will say these kids can't communicate correctly and say it's laced with poor grammar and spelling, but just maybe it's better to call someone a griefer online, than what I do which is grab a random bystander in a bar and shout "You bitch ass motherfucker!!"
Zenwalk 4 - GNU/Linux Athlon XP2500+
Mac OS X 10.4.x MacBook Core Duo 2GHz
WinXP Athlon64 3700+ DFI/Nvidia6800
Please go stand by the stairs so I can protect you.
Who 1337sp33ks ham?
With Microsoft, wouldn't it be Proprietarybase? Wouldn't Microsoft leave the Freebase to the pinko hippies of the Free Base Foundation?
They've cracked our code! I demand money!
Or... you "h4x0r" with your kids to "pwn" the "s3rv3r"?
Bears don't normally eat things that talk and move backwards.
I mean taking over parts of the computer industry fine.
Trying to compete with urbandictionary.com ?
Now thats low.
...Pathetic thing I have ever read. Quite frankly, if you need to read a primer on how to read l33t speak - you have failed the parenting test. Go turn your kid into the authorities, and sell your brain to the Bill and Melinda Gates Borg Foundation. This really does make me sick. If there are actually parents out there who are this degrading to children, and whom love ignoring their kid's privacy completely, then by all means - keep on MS...keep on screwing up humanity.
Help me, help you. - Jerry McGuire
Except she's not crying and it probably took you longer.
"No beer until you finish your tequila!" -Leela's Dad
And not a word about "top posting/full quotes" on MS netiquette page.
Sorry to be a spelling nazi, but I belive its 'pr0n'.
Speaking as a person with a stereotypical slashdot-childhood; I don't think bullies actually need any kind of provocation. The only benefit of provocation is that bullies can pretend their actions are justified.
In my experience both as a child and as a grown-up, bullies will find a "reason" even if there isn't one.
Telling children not to use provocative names in online games is telling them the bullies win.
Slashdot social media options: AIM, ICQ, Yahoo, Jabber and Mobile Text. Why no MySpace?
http://www.megatokyo.com/index.php?strip_id=9
I believe the correct usage is "Pr0n".
This is awesome. That's about all I can really say. Oh, and I do have a question: I am a 1337$p34k3|2 if I use /. for slashdot? omg!
I get a particularly apt rendering bug when looking at the page using FireFox. A grab can be seen here.
This sentence no verb.
From the article:
The ??AA are on their way to lock you up, buddy.
picpix image polls. create - share - vote. fun!
there's nothing "semi-" about it.
Probably summed up in 3 words... n0t 4 j00!
1 1334, j00 1334, bu4 wh0z 31334?
What the fuck is p0rn? I've never heard that term before.
pr0n is cool, though.
I don't see pr0n on there as one of the examples of 'illegal activities' or 'other common l33t words'.
Heh, I searched for "roflocopters" and it spit this back:
"j00|2 534|2(|-| - roflocopters - c|1c| |\|07 |\/|4+(|-| 4|\|y c|0(V|\/|3|\|+5. 5|-|17!!!!"
I like the last word there...
From TFA: "5" or even "$" can replace the letter S
I wonder how anybody from M$ figured that one out...
jesus now the feds can read my secret transmissions. thanks microsoft :(