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I have to wonder if this will just go down as a temporary fad. Why people are unable to see the value in having an entire library's collection in the palm of their hand, with near instant access to any other book if desired, is beyond my comprehension. The only explanation I can come up with is it's a trend like organic food and vinyl.

Maybe e-readers are down even more than digital books in general because those who still do digital books prefer to just read on their existing phone or tablet. Personally I hope they don't stop making e-readers so this is sad news to me. To me, there's great value in electronic ink. I love taking my nook on long plane flights. I can read more books than anyone could pack, and I have a month of battery life. Then there's the direct sunlight thing....

On the other hand.... maybe it's just people like to be pretentious with their books. This could solve that problem

was contemporaneous with this ancient race.

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Trump Administration Refusing To Disclose Names Of White House Diamond Elite Members

This quite reminds me of the local news section on other website, celebrating the highs of daily life. Following is a recent article (continued on web site, so I avoid pasting it entirely)

"Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement"

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley. “When Darren walked up to the lane holding that little pink ball, we were all thinking, ‘Wait a minute, that ball is meant for children,’ but then we realized what he was doing, and everyone just started cracking up,” said friend Kelly Lingard, adding that, as part of his lighthearted and exceptionally entertaining display, Foerstner demonstrated that his thumb and fingers were unable to fit into the smaller holes of the pink ball, forcing him to palm it with his entire hand.
(...)

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

I don't even own a television

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

This is a serious comment? You're not just paraphrasing the Onion? Because you sound an awful lot like this

Hey, you're famous!

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

it is mandatory that all cord-cutter threads start with that 17-year-old Onion article

Karma from point of post deducted

I'll bet you don't own a TV, either...

American People Hire High-Powered Lobbyist To Push Interests In Congress

True story, according to credible sources.

Must you post in that mock-ignorant tone? You realize you've been a joke for almost 20 years, right?

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Obligatory, but Area Man Constantly Mentioning He Doesn't Own a Television.

"College graduates rarely have the skill sets someone who has actually been working in the field an equivalent amount of time has"

http://www.theonion.com/blogpo...

lt's already happening.

You have changed the subject. We were talking about technology. Specifically, its relative absence in the stone age as compared to now, and how that parallels the general shittness of living during the stone age compared to now (and what that might mean for the future).

You tried to say life was better during the stone age, in that context. When I called you on your obvious bullshit, you backpedaled by saying "well, I don't want to opt out of the tech, just the culture, that's what I really meant."

Bullshit. Computers are awesome, and you know it, and that is why you keep using them. Same for our medical tech, air conditioning, microwave ovens, reading glasses, airplanes, and on and on. You don't want to give any of it up because it is fucking awesome compared to a life limited to stone age technology.

About other parts of the world jumping at the opportunity to join us......

Have you HEARD about the wall Trump wants to build? Why, exactly, does he think we need it? Because people ARE JUMPING at the opportunity to join us! Most of the poverty-stricken regions of the world are that way not because they don't want irrigation and air conditioning and a car in every garage...but because they can't fucking afford it. Economic and resource issues keep them trapped in poverty, and they hate it.

This should be obvious. It absolutely is obvious. Read it and reflect on the truth behind the humor.

The Onion nails it again.

There's an app called BribeHOA. Lets you bribe your HOA anonymously.

Un-possible.

In all seriousness, if you have ever tried to deal with an HOA, you'll wish you had never bought a condo.

I bought a nice historic home in an old neighborhood in Michigan. A lot of people, when we bought it, asked if there were a lot of rules about the house. The irony here is that there are almost no rules (although there are a few non-binding rules about the facade of the houses, which you'd be an asshole to not follow). Want to paint your house bright blue? Someone did it this year (ugly, but it's not on my block). It's so funny that living in a recognized historic home has drastically fewer restrictions than an HOA. You cats out west done fucked up with the HOA craze.

There's an app called BribeHOA. Lets you bribe your HOA anonymously.

Un-possible.

In all seriousness, if you have ever tried to deal with an HOA, you'll wish you had never bought a condo.

Found him.

About that whole secession thing...

My favorite Onion of all time: Ross Ice Shelf Embarks On World Tour

I have no respect for these guys; they simply use their scientific credentials to promote their own political prejudices. These people are so ignorant, they still believe in a Malthusian catastrophe.

I think The Onion puts it pretty well:

Doomsday Clock Pushed To One Minute To Midnight After Arby’s Threatens Launch Of 3-Cheese Jalapeño Beef ’N Bacon Melt

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

This comes to mind: http://www.theonion.com/blogpo...

Nah, cats are even easier than dogs.

Pretty sure they'd say fuck everything, we're doing five monitors

Do you not own a television as well?

I'll just leave this here... It's nearly 5 years old now, but still perfect.

http://www.theonion.com/video/...

Congress today reauthorized funding for Facebook, the massive online surveillance program run by the CIA,â said Onion Factzone anchor Brooke Alvarez.
The sheer mass of data that people willingly display about themselves publicly is very, very likely being used by both the US government and foreign governments around the world to gather information about people of interest as well as to understand trends in the overall direction the world is heading. They can see political tendencies that could lead to actions and they can place associations between people through the network.
Is Mark Zuckerberg really a CIA agent, codename âoeThe Overlordâ? One never knows.

We just have to hope Trump et al go ballooning.

You have a point, but I think it's been covered elsewhere already.

RIAA Bans Telling Friends About Songs
http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Fake news can have lots of different motivations.

-- It can be satire or parody, like the Onion.

...

So, out of curiosity, what do you call fake news that turns out to be amazingly accurate? http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Seriously. Read it and get chills about the nature of reality.

Ah I fondly remember that Onion article

...New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn't Fucking Work?

The best comedy requires a grounding in truth to be effective. A lot of the articles on the Onion are funny because we recognize and can relate to their topics. Remind you of anyone you know? Yeah... me too.

Secondhand Smoke Linked to Secondhand Coolness

I am reminded of "The Onion", a site that specializes in creating fake news for entertainment purposes. Perhaps the general solution to the fake news problem can be a multi-part thing: (1) Anyone who can prove a new "news item" is fake would submit the "news item" and the proof to The Onion; (2) The Onion would verify the proof and then publish the fake "news item"; (3) Anyone wondering if a randomly-encountered news item was fake would simply check The Onion; (4) Increased veiwership would allow The Onion to afford a larger staff for verifying "news items" as fakes; (5) Evil-acting governments around the world would collapse after their propaganda got exposed as fake, courtesy of The Onion.

Martian Dasani

http://www.theonion.com/

So, basically, this whole controversy is about shutting down The Onion.

Good. I'm glad we've cleared that up.

TL;DR: Because courage?

Obligatory Onion article.

Hey look, the onion wrote an article about you: http://www.theonion.com/articl...

I on the other hand, have no fear of conservative backlash,
so I am happy to recycle this dated but completely true news story:

http://www.theonion.com/graphi...

"Vessel For Male Gratification Very Sad Today" - The Onion

You just elected a Russian mole.

Sure. Because Kremlin says so... Except, they don't even claim that... It is all a product of hypotheses, suggestions, and unsubstantiated — usually anonymous — claims.

Meanwhile, a few facts about Clinton's recent past:

• In 2010 abolished the anti-Russia sanctions imposed over their invasion of Georgia in 2008 — thus, predictably, inviting them into Ukraine (and, correspondingly, to Syria).
• Criticized and mocked, along with other "Progressives", the very notion, that Russia may be hostile to the United States.
• "Reset".
• Routed billions of dollars worth of American investments into Russia's high tech — some of it with military purpose — while rewarding herself in the process.
• Has a history of taking bribes from Putin with who knows what other things remaining up his sleeve with which to blackmail her.

The only thing, that can be done to address the above accusations by your kind is down-modding them — facts are stubborn. So, apply some Vaseline, charge your Prius and head for Canada as you promised.

The Beautiful Wickedness finally had some water splashed on her, and us, the deplorable munchkins, are rejoicing.

And working on his sweet 81 TransAm. http://www.theonion.com/search...

The long line of Priuses heading North causing traffic jams on the usually quiet border-crossings. Ah, if only...

BTW, why is not any one of these people talking about moving to Mexico? Racist much?..

To paraphrase Jonah Goldberg, after this election my therapist will ask, "Please show me on this doll where the 2016 election touched you inappropriately."

FEC Extends Election By 7 Months To Give Nation Chance To Better Get To Know Candidates

2016 is the last thing The Onion would have wanted. Who wants to read a parody newspaper when the real newspapers have more outlandish content.

We have been living in a "The Onion" reality since at least January 17, 2001.

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Enjoy the fact that reality is so twisted that only an outrageous parody could predict it so accurately.