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What Would You Do With a 92 TBps Router?

enodev writes "Cisco announces today it's new 'Carrier routing system' For a price tag starting at $450,000 it's able to route up to 92 Tbps. It also features IOS-XR and the first optical OC-768c/STM-256c optical Interface." update changed TBps to Tbps and suddenly things seemed less cool ;)

90 of 344 comments (clear)

  1. I know exactly what I'd do by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    I begins with 'p' and ends with 'r0n'.

    1. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by savagedome · · Score: 5, Funny

      ends with 'r0n'

      Not to be picky but it starts with r0n and ends with Jeremy :D

      *ducks*

    2. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by baudilus · · Score: 2, Funny

      We assume the following is true:

      nerds : bandwidth :: crackheads : crack

      Now we assume that I have the kind of bandwidth that makes this router useful. And we all know what crackheads will do for crack...

      </sarcasm>

    3. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by Jugalator · · Score: 2, Funny

      It would be pretty fun to use it for pissing off RIAA big time too.

      --
      Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
    4. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by Rick+the+Red · · Score: 2, Funny

      I know what I'd do: Sell it on eBay.

      WTF else am I going to do with it? Use it as a doorstop?

      --
      If all this should have a reason, we would be the last to know.
    5. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by Lehk228 · · Score: 2, Funny

      well if you want to download 92 TBps of gigantic schlong then go right ahead

      --
      Snowden and Manning are heroes.
    6. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by Rick.C · · Score: 2, Funny
      Forget the "Information Superhighway".

      I'd connect the output to the input and invent the "Information Cyclotron"!!

      --
      You were 80% angel, 10% demon. The rest was hard to explain. - Over The Rhine
      "Math in a song is good."-Linford
    7. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      Now we assume that I have the kind of bandwidth that makes this router useful. And we all know what crackheads will do for crack...

      If I ever see a guy on a street corner with a sign that says "will suck dick for bandwidth", then I'm quitting the computing profession.

    8. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by Gallowsgod · · Score: 2, Funny

      I begins with 'p' and ends with 'r0n'.

      That's right, aim low. Personally, I'd go to some bar where geek girls hang out and ask if any of them would want to go back to my place and see my 92TBps router.

      --

      The belief in a biblical god is an ignorant one
    9. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by shannara256 · · Score: 2, Funny

      > Not to be picky but it starts with r0n and ends with Jeremy

      Picky or pricky?

    10. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by monkeydo · · Score: 2, Informative

      The smallest interface you can get on these is an OC-48. That's approx. 48 T3's.

      --
      Si vis pacem, para bellum
      The only thing more annoying than a Libertarian is an (un|mis)informed Libertarian
    11. Re:I know exactly what I'd do by E_elven · · Score: 2, Funny

      I'm afraid I have some bad news for you..

      --
      Marxist evolution is just N generations away!
  2. More info.... by Mz6 · · Score: 5, Informative
    Well, I was going to comment and see what, if anything, Juniper Networks was going to come out with but I found a NYTimes article to answer it otherwise. Here's a snippet:

    "Juniper Networks has individual routers that are at least as fast, but the company cannot combine as many routers to ultimately produce the same speeds, according to Chris Nicoll, a telecommunications industry analyst with Current Analysis, a research firm."

    and more....

    "The new router design is the first developed by Cisco that allows several routers to be connected, according to the company. A single router would be able to transmit data at 1.2 terabits a second. But as many as 72 routers can be hooked together to send data at 92 terabits a second, far faster than any router sold now. In telecommunications, data transfer is usually measured in bits per second. A terabit is one trillion bits. "

    --
    Hmmm.
    1. Re:More info.... by Rhubarb+Crumble · · Score: 5, Funny
      "The new router design is the first developed by Cisco that allows several routers to be connected, according to the company. A single router would be able to transmit data at 1.2 terabits a second. But as many as 72 routers can be hooked together to send data at 92 terabits a second, far faster than any router sold now."

      I have this weird image of a pile 72 routers being daisy-chained serially, with the insanely grinning salesman standing next to it saying "Look! If you connect them to each other they go twice as fast! It goes up to 11!"

      Now that gold-plated high-speed modem cable will finally come in handy!

  3. what would I do? by mrhandstand · · Score: 5, Funny

    Route traffic.

    --
    Always value the individual over the system. --Bruce Lee "I don't need a Sig - I have a custom 191" - me
    1. Re:what would I do? by SnowDeath · · Score: 3, Interesting

      Finally be able to play a 16 player lan game of quake AND any other game without the other game suffering...

    2. Re:what would I do? by dickiedoodles · · Score: 2, Funny

      At $450,000 I'd sell it

      --
      In Soviet Russia Slashdot cliches use you
    3. Re:what would I do? by ScottGant · · Score: 5, Funny

      I have a Linux machine and a WinXP machine that my wife uses. I'd probably use it to link them up. It would probably be faster than my Linksys router I'm using now.

      It could probably even take another computer on it too...but I wouldn't want to push it.

      --

      "Music is everybody's possession. It's only publishers who think that people own it." - John Lennon.
    4. Re:what would I do? by NanoGator · · Score: 2, Funny

      "Finally be able to play a 16 player lan game of quake AND any other game without the other game suffering... "

      I've got a 100 megabit switch I'll sell ya for a much cheaper 100 grand.

      --
      "Derp de derp."
  4. Various uses by chendo · · Score: 4, Funny

    Horny bastard: Porn. Lots of porn.

    Script kiddie: OMG I CAN DOS PPL!!!!!!!111111111oneone

    Pirate: Warez, and other assorted treasures.

    CowboyNeal: Hey, we can use it to host slashdot!

    --
    Founder of Mirror Moon - Tsukihime Game Trans
  5. I would be very, very pissed... by jbarr · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...because my home network equipment only has 100Mbps adapters, and I can't afford to upgrade them all.

    --
    My mom always said, "Jim, you're 1 in a million." Given the current population, there are 7000 of me. God help us all!
  6. I would by Achoi77 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Sell it for $450,000. Then get a house.

    1. Re:I would by wo1verin3 · · Score: 2, Informative

      thats probably the worst use of the cliche i've ever seen, you should be ashamed of yourself.

      In soviet russia, you could get a cheap knock off for 20 bux. Something like the C-C-C-Carrier R-R-R-Routing S-S-S-System. I'm sure you can find that on ebay.

  7. I know what I'm gonna do by 6Yankee · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hang it off the back of my 56k modem, what do you think I'm gonna do with it? Sheesh!

  8. What Would You Do With a 92 TBps Router? by perrinkog · · Score: 5, Funny

    "What Would You Do With a 92 TBps Router?"

    Pinky : "Gee, Brain what do you want to do tonight?"
    Brain : "The same thing we do every night Pinky. Try to take over the world!"

    --
    (Karma = auto -1)
  9. Re:I would... by Rosyna · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yeah, is there any other thing to do with that much bandwidth? You could get porn at such high resolution you can see the ingrown hairs on the porn "actress'" butt.

    "My bunghole itches. Is it because I am a girl?"

  10. that could by cassidyc · · Score: 3, Funny

    pump out a lot of spam...

    Failing that with enough filespace it could server an awful lot of mp3/ogg/aac

    CJC

    1. Re:that could by Fearless+Freep · · Score: 3, Funny

      pump out a lot of spam...

      from that Windows-based supercomputer...

    2. Re:that could by Patrik_AKA_RedX · · Score: 4, Funny
      pump out a lot of spam...
      And someone modded this "Interesting". I think you've given someone an idea. May God save our inboxes...
    3. Re:that could by Patrik_AKA_RedX · · Score: 2, Funny

      She can, but not full-duplex.

  11. Not IOS though by sphealey · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Interestingly however it does not use IOS. Which brings up several questions: is Cisco going to start replacing IOS with redesigned-from-scratch (watch out for second system effect!)? Or will they maintain two routing software bases, IOS and whatever the new one is called? Will this be an issue from either a marketing or technical/CCIE perspective?

    sPh

    1. Re: Not IOS though by CAIMLAS · · Score: 4, Informative

      Did you bother to even look at the site? Nooo of course not. From the site:

      The Cisco CRS-1 is powered by Cisco IOS XR Software, a unique self-healing and self-defending operating system designed for always-on operation while scaling system capacity up to 92 Tbps.

      Click on "Cisco IOS XR" and you get:

      Q. What is Cisco IOS XR Software?

      A. Cisco IOS XR Software is the newest member of the Cisco IOS Software Family. Cisco IOS XR has been developed to address the requirements for scale, availability, and service flexibility which arise from the creation of converged packet infrastructures that consolidate voice, video, and data services. Cisco IOS XR Software has been specifically optimized to take advantage of the massively distributed processing capabilities of the Cisco CRS-1 Carrier Routing System.


      Why do you even bother posting? I wouldn't think it's for karma whoring - such a low UID isn't likely to partake in such things unless adicted. It certainly isn't to contribute quality material to the discussion, either.

      --
      ~/ssh slashdot.org ssh: connect to host slashdot.org port 22: too many beers
    2. Re: Not IOS though by vangilder · · Score: 2, Informative

      An article in the Wall Street Journal yesterday [wsj.com] mentioned that they were getting rid of IOS in favor of something more "user-friendly." Their big competition is Juniper and, in order to sell more boxen (routen?) they have had to answer to complaints about IOS. Also, the article mentioned that IOS wass getting to be around 15e6 lines of code, and was impossible to maintain. Yay for a free market where consumers can actually vote with thier wallet and compaines have to respond or someone else will.

    3. Re: Not IOS though by Mateito · · Score: 2, Informative

      What do you mean "Not IOS"?

      All your questions are answered here:

      http://www.cisco.com/en/US/products/ps5763/produ ct s_qanda_item09186a008022e09b.shtml

    4. Re: Not IOS though by sphealey · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Not sure I understand your complaint. I read the article in the Wall Street Journal on Monday, and also several web articles Monday night and Tuesday morning.

      Given that I had already read Cisco's press releases (which perhaps I should have specified), none of the material you quoted answers any of the questions I posed. I am interested in the community's answers, not Cisco's spin.

      sPh

    5. Re: Not IOS though by trailerparkcassanova · · Score: 2, Informative

      IOS isn't suitable for service-provider products. A few years ago when I worked for Cisco they were just starting this project and were also starting to architect a new OS. Believe it or not they intended to call it CHAOS; Cisco High-Availabilty Operating System. Shoe phones not included.

    6. Re: Not IOS though by sphealey · · Score: 2, Informative
      You know those crazy guys at the Wall Street Journal news division, always getting things wrong:
      Cisco is taking a gamble with its counterattack, scrapping the software included in nearly every Cisco product since the company was founded two decades ago in favor of a new operating system designed to make the router easier to maintain and manage. "This is probably Cisco's most important" new product for telecom carriers, says Gabriel Lowy, an analyst for Blaylock & Partners LP. "The core router company wants to remain the core router company."

      Wall Street Journal, Midwest Edition, May 24, 2004.

      (subscription only so you will have to dig a paper copy out of the trash). There is other interesting discussion in the article as well.

      With that settled, could we get back to discussing the questions I posed? I am still interested in what router and technology buying dudes have to say.

      sPh

    7. Re: Not IOS though by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative
      I believe IOS XR is what was called internally ENA. This was an attempt to rewrite IOS from scratch - IOS was aparently very hard to make robust and to maintain, essentially operting in a single memory space. ENA was rumoured to a multi-process architecture running on QNX. But re-writing IOS is a really hard task, and Cisco seem to have lost faith in ENA at some point, reducing the platforms supported to only be the HFR.

      They took another track with the rest of their product line, which was to slowly migrate from the original IOS monolith to a multi-process architecture, without a complete re-write.

      But my information is out of date, so the situation may have changed somewhat.

    8. Re: Not IOS though by silas_moeckel · · Score: 2, Informative

      It's a redesigned backend but they have redesigned the backend before most recently for the GSR's (the 12k line) I was implemeting them when they first shipped and while the front end is the same the bad end was rather different. This is nothing new for Cisco everything is pretty much C modules that get compiled for the new artitecture and/or written for the new hardware. It's realy not that hard to replace a software bit with hardware by just writting a wrapper module.

      A side note read the specs for the OC768 Module it is clear channel only no sub interfaces this beast is realy only for interconnecting these things at 40gbps thats a lot of bandwith on one pipe.

      --
      No sir I dont like it.
  12. hrm... by morgajel · · Score: 4, Funny

    Make a CD Case?

    actually, I just hook it up in my apartment and not tell anyone- then the next lan party I host not get complaints that my network is too slow.
    (bastards.)

    --
    Looking for Book Reviews? Check out Literary Escapism.
  13. STM256! by REBloomfield · · Score: 2, Interesting
    "It also features IOS-XR and the first optical OC-768c/STM-256c optical Interface."

    I'm studying Optical transmissions at the moment, and just getting my head around how bytes were interleaved and mapped across AU's, TUG's etc in *one* STM was a stretch enough, (the diagrams are nuts), and now there's an STM2565! That's a bloody lot of multiplexing....

    Bet they're glad they don't use PDH anymore....

    1. Re:STM256! by vyzar · · Score: 5, Informative

      You can be sure it will actually be STM-256c as opposed to plain vanilla STM-256.

      Almost NO datacomms equipment manufacturers support the non-concatenated versions of SDH above STM-1. I have bitten in the past by companies that said they support STM-4 when they actually meant STM-4c. And of course at the time the telcos only support STM-4 and NOT STM-4c.

      I suspect that the STM-256 support will be the same.

      (For the uninitiated STM-4 is a straight multiplexing of 4 STM-1s, each with their own header and payload sections. STM-4c is essentially one big STM channel with a single header section and a single concatenated payload section. STM-256c just extends this principle to more insane capacities).

  14. Careful by choas · · Score: 5, Funny

    Now you guys please be careful not to /. Cisco :)

    --
    I will work to elevate you, just enough to bring you down
  15. After Much Deliberation.... by bfg9000 · · Score: 4, Funny

    ... I'd sell it and buy an Aston Martin. I'm not THAT much of a geek -- big routers just don't attract the babes the way I'd like.

    --

    I'm not normally an irrational zealous dickhead, but I figure "When in Rome..."

    1. Re:After Much Deliberation.... by Patrik_AKA_RedX · · Score: 5, Funny

      You know, each time I see some guy driving one those cars I can't help feeling sorry for him for the size of his "router".

    2. Re:After Much Deliberation.... by stienman · · Score: 4, Funny

      Way to give the ladies a headache, dude...

      "Oooh, Aston Martin! Argh! Geek! But it is an Astin Martin... but that geek! Ugh... I wonder if I can unbundle this comingled product - Where's an antitrust lawyer when you need one?"

      -Adam

    3. Re:After Much Deliberation.... by nlh · · Score: 2, Insightful
      Blasphemy! I mean, you couldn't possible be implying that Aston Martin's have phallic symbolism....who on earth would ever think that....

      Vanquish

      It's people like you that probably think that Joe Camel had some sort of symbolism too!

      Just a Camel

      ;)

  16. Terabits, not terabytes by jfengel · · Score: 5, Informative

    It's a small point, but the article calls it 92 Tbps, not 92 TBps. Which means its really 19 terabytes per second, which works out to some ungodly number of libraries of congress per fortnight. Either way, it's a lot.

    1. Re:Terabits, not terabytes by prescot6 · · Score: 5, Funny

      ...the article calls it 92 Tbps, not 92 TBps. Which means its really 19 terabytes per second.

      Psh.. only 19 terabytes? I _was_ excited, but now...

      :)
    2. Re:Terabits, not terabytes by crashnbur · · Score: 2, Informative

      Last I checked, a byte is 8 bits, so 92 TB would actually be 11.5 Tb.

    3. Re:Terabits, not terabytes by Bios_Hakr · · Score: 2, Informative

      There may or may not be parity, start/stop bits, CRC, or other overhead added to that number. It could mean that it does 92Tbps before the overhead, or after.

      Yes, one byte is 8 bits, but there is usually a lot of variance in that number when you talk line speed.

      --
      I'd rather you do it wrong, than for me to have to do it at all.
  17. Obligatory grammar nazi by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Cisco announces today it's new 'Carrier routing system'

    It's "its," not "it's!" Sometimes I think the grammar behind this is starting to devolve... or at least I'm having difficulty parsing it now.

  18. Get your units right by dsanfte · · Score: 3, Informative

    Terabits/sec (Tbps), not Terabytes/sec (TBps).

    I'm not surprised some moron doesn't know his units, especially when it's mentioned in the article and placed in its proper notation. I'm surprised the EDITORS refuse to change it to be factual.

    --
    occultae nullus est respectus musicae - originally a Greek proverb
  19. What I would do.... by michael+path · · Score: 4, Funny

    The first thing I'd do is set it up for use with my Cable Modem connection.

    Immediately, I'd notice it wouldn't work.

    Then I'd call up my technical support for the cable service, and tell them I couldn't connect.

    They would have me unplug the modem from the "PC", shut down my computer, and reboot it. It wouldn't work.

    Then they'd have me cycle the cable modem.

    Then they'd ask me if I had a router. I would say "Yeah, I do bitches! I got me a Cisco 92TBps. Cost me almost a half-mil, but it's sooo cool!"

    Then they'd tell me it was unsupported, to which I'd respond I would wedge that pizza box sideways up their asses.

    THE END

    1. Re:What I would do.... by darc · · Score: 2, Funny

      Actually, the conversation would go more like this:

      You: "Hello?"
      "PLEASE DIAL ONE FOR BUSINESS SUPPORT, TWO FOR..."
      *five*
      You: "Hello?"
      "PLEASE ENTER THE ID NUM..."
      *fivefivefiveonetwoonetwo*
      Them: *thick indian accent* "Hello?"
      You: "What?"
      Them: "Yes, hello." ...
      Them: "Do you have a router?"
      You: "No, I don't want to buy a scooter."
      Them: "No no, a router."
      You: "Oh yes, I have a Cisco 92TBps."
      Them: "What did you say about my mother?"
      You: "I said, I have a Cisco 92tbps router."
      Them: "Why must you say such horrible things about.."
      *click*

      At this point, it's best to give up, and just post a stupid, but popular question to ask slashdot to better show off the router. "I just acquired a Cisco 92TBps router and am trying to set up an ISP in my apartment building using only a thimble of wax and a two by four wood plank with a nail in it. Can someone tell me my legal liabilities for this ISP, and an open source solution to manage the whole thing, as well as an OS replacement for the cisco IOS firmware?"

      --
      Tired of legitimate data sources? Try UNCYCLOPEDIA
  20. I would just go about everything like normal. by Hopelessness · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I would pretend there were enough other people out there with high speeds to make this even remotely useful.

  21. IOS XR is QNX by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Informative

    Who says you can't get performance from a microkernel?

    This was the product whose internal development code name was HFR (Huge Fscking Router).

    Sweet!

    p.s.
    Note the other key word "self-healing".

  22. slashdot by kjeldor · · Score: 5, Funny

    I would...
    for the first time ever...
    *gasps*
    attempt to slashdot slashdot.

  23. Re:But... by CaptnMArk · · Score: 4, Funny

    TCP/IP over OpenGL over DRM?

  24. Finding uses... by chuckcolby · · Score: 2, Insightful
    I'd probably use it to prop open my door or somethng. Maybe set a coffee pot atop it. The problem with a Tbps router is that you'd need to feed it traffic.

    And why do we need to route this much traffic? Because over 60% of all email is spam. Because unpatched systems are getting trojans, which in turn are contacting their makers.

    --
    We all get along together like tornadoes and trailer parks.
  25. With a 95% confidence level, by gutterandthestars · · Score: 5, Funny

    90% of posts will be 1.1 standard deviations away from one of the following:

    0. "fist pr0st!!!!!111~"
    1. "92TBps of pr0n!!!"
    2. "Imagine a beowulf cluster of these!"
    3. "I for one welcome our OC-768c/STM-256/optical Interface overlords!"
    4. "1. OC-768c 2. STM-256 3. ... 4. PROFIT!!!"
    5. "If IOS is based on unix, does that mean Cisco will have to pay SCO for licenses?"
    6. "I use BNC you insensitive clod!"
    7. "emacs does this

    1. Re:With a 95% confidence level, by mooingyak · · Score: 5, Funny

      I think you forgot:

      "All of your routers are belong to us"
      and
      "In Soviet Russia, traffic routes you"

      You nailed the rest of the cliches I can think of though.

      --
      William of Ockham had no beard. The most likely explanation is that it was chewed off by squirrels every morning.
    2. Re:With a 95% confidence level, by Sir-Techlot · · Score: 2, Funny

      Another slashdot cliche: "BSD is dying"

      Of course, there is always the slashdot random story generator

      One guy in our office had his default home page set to slashdot. Someone changed it to this page. It took him 10 minutes before he noticed.

  26. Vast knowledge by marco0009 · · Score: 2, Funny

    I would download the Library of Congress...

    and then porn.
    On a more serious note, I would very much like to setup my own "Internet Node". No need for me to pay for sattelite internet any more, the internet comes to me!

    --
    Physics makes the world go 'round.
  27. Hook it to my analog modem by nurb432 · · Score: 4, Insightful

    What good does the router do with nothing to connect too..

    They dont work in a vacuum.

    --
    ---- Booth was a patriot ----
  28. How do you test it? by Boyceterous · · Score: 5, Interesting

    How do they go about testing the full capacity for these? Would a customer ever know if was not quite getting full throughput?

    1. Re:How do you test it? by bugnuts · · Score: 2, Funny

      I can just imagine cisco getting a call...

      "Hi, I just bought one of your 92T routers, and a few minutes ago, I only got 101,155,069,755,390 bits through in one of the seconds. Can you send me my two bits please?"

  29. Well, I'd... by GeneralEmergency · · Score: 2, Funny


    ...connect up a bunch of those Beowulf Clusters you /.ers are always on about!

    --
    "A microprocessor... is a terrible thing to waste." --
    GeneralEmergency
  30. I'd... by fizban · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...route all traffic to www.slashdot.org and slash the dot.

    --

    +1 Insightful, -1 Troll. What can I say, I'm an Insightful Troll.

  31. interesting story (or maybe not) by CAIMLAS · · Score: 4, Funny

    I had a silly asignment for a class of mine: look up and a router, tell me what it can do, and then compare/contrast the router you picked with one another classmate picked.

    Being the sadistic mothrefucker that I am, I hopped over to cisco's site at about 1am and saw this beast listed "Carrier Router System". I didn't recognize it as a "normal" Cisco offering, and 92Tb/s is really fucking fast. Though, beyond that, I didn't think anything of it. Cisco is just expected to have the fastest stuff out there, right? And to think, were I more up on my Cisco products, I could've submitted this to the front page. (And they could have denied me access, and posted someone else's submission 12 hours later, as tends to be the case around here :P)

    As it sands, those sorry sons-of-bitches in my IT200 networking course are going to hate me. They likely all picked SOHO equipment to compare/contrast and won't know up from down when it comes to comparing/contrasting. "What's 'Tbps' mean?" they'll ask.

    --
    ~/ssh slashdot.org ssh: connect to host slashdot.org port 22: too many beers
  32. Re:its a shame by Octorian · · Score: 2, Interesting

    As much as one could say what you just said, Cisco does have an advantage. They have routers for the high-end, the low-end, and the middle-ground, all with consistency of the interface.

    I've seen competitors with good high-end gear, and sometimes good really-low-end gear (SOHO). But the middle ground, where you'd use something like a 2500 series, 4000 series, or the 2600/3600 is where I wonder if there are any competing products.

    Of course there are those all-in-one four-million-feature boxes (firewall, router, spam filtering, load balancing, IDS, etc.), but sometimes people just want a router to throw in a closet somewhere and grok OSPF between buildings on a campus site.

  33. Re:its a shame by corrosiv · · Score: 2, Informative


    It's not running IOS.

  34. Top 10 by darnok · · Score: 5, Funny

    10. Tell all my mates. Note the names of the one or two who don't laugh at me, and remember to send them, and only them, Xmas cards this year

    9. Get a really really fast sniffer, so I can make sure there's no porn traffic going through my router

    8. Write out 92Tb as a decimal number, just because I know it'll look really impressive

    7. Use it to pick up chicks. Revert to old story about being in astronaut training program, as it would be just as successful and slightly less geeky

    6. It's optical, right? See what happens when I cross the beams...

    5. Sleep with it under my bed. Less painful than a vasectomy, and probably just as effective

    4. Paint go-fast stripes on it, put a "Turbo" sticker on it, then track down and razz anyone who spent $450k on the "old, non-turbo version" by mistake

    3. Use it to beat the living daylights out of everyone associated with "Big Brother". I really really hate that show

    2. Advertise it on eBay with a photo, no reserve, and a description of "some sort of computer network thingy"

    1. Buy 2 and see if they'll reproduce in captivity

  35. Time Travel? by the+eric+conspiracy · · Score: 3, Funny


    Put some instant coffee inside to see if I could go back in time....

  36. BSEG... by mr.+methane · · Score: 3, Funny

    conf t
    int pos 2/0
    *giggle*
    shut
    *cackle*
    no shut
    *snort*
    shut
    *ROFL*
    no shut
    "Sir, I can't see anything wrong with the network. It must (shut) be a problem (no shut) with your equipment.

  37. What I would do is... by JustNiz · · Score: 2, Funny

    Sell it and pay off my mortgage.

  38. What would I do? by dentar · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hook a modem up to it and start surfing!

    --
    -- I am. Therefore, I think!
  39. Re:What would I do.... by mog007 · · Score: 2, Funny

    anywhere near your computer plan to surf naked.

    Considering the amount of porn you could amass with this thing, I'd say it's a pretty likely bet that the user WOULD be naked. Clothing just gets in the way.

  40. mirror by OglinTatas · · Score: 2, Funny

    mirror, in case of slashdotting

  41. Cisco web by zcougar · · Score: 2, Funny

    Can it make Cisco website faster?

  42. Longhorn Requirement by cylcyl · · Score: 5, Funny

    In other news, MS says such routers need to be installed in every home to allow the downloading of Longhorn patches.

    1. Re:Longhorn Requirement by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      And as a new feature in Longhorn, Windows will only hog 90Tbps of you internet connection.

  43. And the other 10%... by dark-br · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...would be ppl with lists of the other 90%.

    God, i love this place!

  44. What to do, what to do... by phyruxus · · Score: 4, Funny

    >>Are you thinking what I'm thinking, Pinky?
    >>I think so Brain, but how can we afford to get a router that can do 92 Tb/s?
    >>Pinky, what did I tell you about reading /. before we plot our schemes?

    --
    "A witty saying proves nothing." ~Voltaire
    "d'Oh!" ~Homer
  45. Alternately by appleLaserWriter · · Score: 2, Interesting

    I'd rent it out to the government, and then use the resulting rent to make payments on:

    (1) a condo in NYC
    (2) a Maserati
    (3) a NetJets account

  46. I could finally.... by Excelsior · · Score: 2, Funny

    Keep my system up to date with windowsupdate.microsoft.com.

  47. CISCO Using QNX by Kilkonie · · Score: 3, Informative
    I think the more interesting story might be what it's running.

    QNX Powers Universal Media Gateway for Next-Generation Digital Video Networks
    QNX Software Systems today announced that the QNX® Neutrino® realtime operating system (RTOS) will be shipping as part of the Cisco uMG9850 QAM Module, a new quadrature amplitude modulation product designed to let cable operators use Gigabit Ethernet to deliver video-on-demand and other multimedia services efficiently and cost-effectively to TV set-top receivers.

    'Little OS that could' just might
    "In a deal signed two years ago, Cisco (csco) chose QNX as its preferred real-time OS vendor as part of Cisco's 'ongoing efforts to increase the reliability and availability of data-voice-video networks.' Since then, not much seems to have materialized from the partnership."

    Cisco's HFR is here
    "The IOS-XR operating system kernel was acquired from QNX Software Systems, a small Canadian developer of realtime operating system code to companies in the automotive, communications, defense, industrial automation and medical device markets. Cisco already ships QNX operating system code in its uMG9850 QAM digital video module for the Catalyst 4500 Gigabit Ethernet switch."

    Cisco Unveils the HFR
    " The transition is analagous to Microsoft Corp. (Nasdaq: MSFT - message board) moving from DOS-based operating systems to Windows NT, says analyst Stephen Kamman of CIBC World Markets.

    Just as NT did, IOS XR could begin trickling down to lower-level systems, eventually permeating Cisco's entire portfolio, including edge and enterprise boxes. "The question is how quickly they can push that software through the product line," Kamman says."

    "The software is based on a kernel licensed from QNX Software Systems, but tailored for the job. 'We have made some pretty substantial modifications to [the QNX code] that are Cisco proprietary,' Volpi says."

    [Disclaimer: This is a very happy QNX Employee.]

  48. More Importantly by sharkey · · Score: 2, Funny

    Has Cisco installed the same backdoor as in previous version of their software?

    --

    --
    "Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
  49. It's just a PR bid. by sserendipity · · Score: 2, Insightful


    This is a just a bid for PR.

    Juniper's router interconnect product is being announced shortly, and will allow users to interconnect T640s already installed in their network - no forklift upgrade. Cisco just wants to get something in the news before it rolls out, so that they don't seem quite so much the technological also-rans that they are, in this space.

    Considering the number of delays this box's development has undergone, one can only imagine how many exciting 'Cisco features' have been left in to make this rush to market possible.

  50. Bongos by marmot1101 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Us it to route TCP/IP Over Bongos