Slashdot Mirror
A New Species Of Giant Ape?
jd writes "The New Scientist, The Age (an Australian newspaper), Daily Telegraph (a British newspaper), BBC, and the Discovery Channel are talking excitedly about a strange primate, found in the Congo. Locals say it is notorious for killing fully-grown adult lions. Optimists hope that it is a new species, maybe related to the gorilla. Pessimists claim it's an overgrown chimpanzee. In either case, primates aren't discovered every day, making this a rare find indeed."
I've already discovered a couple of those in my local pub.
King Kong found in the Congo.
Yet another stupid article withotu photos (well, there's stock photos but that's hardly relevant).
. . . Peter Jackson began production on his remake of king Kong in the Congo last week . . .
"Developers, developers, developers!"
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
es, Dubya !
Up way to late and I read that as found giant gorillas killing adults...
I think I've read congo a few to many times.
GNAA declares victory over Wikipedia
Zeikfried - Associated Press, Nigeria
In a week which shall be recorded in Wikipedia infamy (and then vandalized and redirected to clitoris), the oft persecuted and never defeated internet missionaries of the Gay Nigger Association of America struck yet another powerful and telling blow against the powerful forces of bigotry and racism. Most notably, the growing zionist community on renowned internet pissing yard wikipedia.org.
And the records have indeed tumbled, with an unheard of third successful survival from the digital shitheap that is "Votes For Deletion". Coming in spite a heinous act of self promotion and cyber terrorism by Pat Gunn/Improv (formerly known as Aharon Meshenstein prior to his infiltration of the United States), who listed and inspired mob vandalism upon the GNAA's entry.
Fresh from his promotion of Wikipedia's $50,000 fundraiser for arms and supplies to the Jewish state of Israel, Improv launched a series of unprovoked and slanderous attacks against the well loved organisations leadership, all the while using foul and unholy necromancies to enlist the dead themselves to vote the entries deletion. Names such as "Wolfman" and "Demonslave" only adding to the damning list of evidence linking Mr Gunn to the occult.
Though Improv's actions gained him a small majority, a shock last minute intervention from Pope John Paul II spared the pages untimely fate, although as yet unconfirmed reports have indicated that several hundred 8-year old negro children were driven to the Basilica to secure the pontiffs support. Others point towards the black curse cast upon the deletion campaign by the support of infamous Brawl Hall mouthpiece "Yoyo" as the main driving force behind the salvation of the aforementioned entry.
But the details are likely to cause few sleepless nights among the group, only one of whom was willing to speak to the press. Namely GNAA Wikipedia contributor Popeye, who interrupted his drawing of pornography to give a brief dismissal the controversy: "Even with Improv's shady dealings, the sheer size and girth of a swollen GNAA phallus enables it both an identity and a vote of it's own. Making such discussion moot".
About Wikipedia:
Wikipedia, a content-free encyclopedia in many languages, started life in January 2001 and has already risen to the status of the internets premiere "trollpedia".
Currently Wikipedia contains 363950 articles, 10032 of which are genuine, and 343 of them factually accurate. Leaving Wikipedia on an academic par with "Star Wars: Incredible Cross-sections: The Ultimate Guide to Star Wars Vehicles and Spacecraft" and "My First Book of Animals from A to Z".
About GNAA:
GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) is the first organization which gathers GAY NIGGERS from all over America and abroad for one common goal - being GAY NIGGERS.
Are you GAY ?
Are you a NIGGER ?
Are you a GAY NIGGER ?
If you answered "Yes" to all of the above questions, then GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATI
found here
Wasn't this story reported -- and discussed here -- in august last year as well?
8 /1 0/0014206&tid=134&tid=14
http://science.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=03/0
(Of course, I didn't RTFA)
If the answers to these questions are yes, then we need to get a gorilla that understands sign language ASAP.
Do I read to much?* At least I never saw the movie.
*well, not TFA, apparently. ;-)
"Empathise with stupidity, and you're halfway to thinking like an idiot." - Iain M. Banks
Wonderful discovery but, now that we've found them, one wonders how long it'll be before we somehow manage to wipe the species out :(
imagine that the world isn't so small afterall. I hope that this isn't just some one of a kind oddity but an actual new species, it would give hope to all the cryptozooligists out there that perhaps their favorit mythical beastie is real.
This sig has no nutritional value...
...that it wasn't just George Bush on vacation?
Bob
Listen to my latest album here
They were coming in for the kill. I was directly in front of them, and as soon as they saw my face, they stopped and disappeared.
An ape capable of killing lions ran away after a peek--that must have been one ugly face!
I for one welcome our new hitherto unknown giant congolese ape overlords
He/She/it's already on the US 'Do not fly' list
AT&ROFLMAO
King of the Jungle, kills lions with bare hands?
Lars T.
To the guy who modded me down from perfect to terrible Karma - Apple haters still suck
...of these Apes or do we have to fund an expedition to bring back some photographic evidence of these creatures?
If you ignore the other uses of a tool, does that make the tool less useful, or you less useful?
I believe Ms Williams has stumbled across the breeding/training ground for Microsoft's army of evil monkeys.
I wonder why they stopped attacking when they saw her...
"Empathise with stupidity, and you're halfway to thinking like an idiot." - Iain M. Banks
Slashdot "libertarians": Small government for me, big government for those I disagree with. -1, I disagree with you
.... Cowboy Neal have a family reunion in the Congo every year?
Say cheese
Look it, only 1 & 1/2 stars.
Locals say it is notorious for killing fully-grown adult lions.
IT's new, but already notorious... and it's been slashdotted as well.
On a more serious basis, why don't the "new scientists" directly ask the locals about the species they know, I am sure they'd find out many things instead of just tracking these on their own.
Trolling using another account since 2005.
Wonder how long till they get turned into bushmeat
My email addy? should be easy enough.
that things are british or australian?
I suppose you need to point out lesser known quality brands that aren't the USian kool-aid.
I'm glad that the cliche about technology (it will be applied first in porn) does not apply to zoological discoveries too.
*phew*
Blearf. Blearf, I say.
this seems to be related and has pictures and better info - just look at the size of those footprints?
http://karlammann.com/bondo.html
Bigfoot ?
Nick...
Electronic Music Made Using Linux http://soundcloud.com/polyp
Can this realy be true? An ape which lives in the jungle known to kill lions that live on the plains - got to be a hoax....
We discovered this species years ago. In Montana, I believe. We don't call it a primate ape though, I think us Americans call it "B I G F O O T" Just a thought.
the species turned out to be that known as "bigfoot" or that of a wookie.
Yes, I have RTFA. Yes, I have a girlfriend. Yes, I'm new here. And no, I don't want a free iPod.
If we found something interesting it would attract more investment. People would be more interested in conserving it.
That can't help but make me skeptical -- these people have a compelling reason to hype these reports in order to encourage conservation and protection of the area.
It would be pretty interesting if it's true, however -- my guess would be that a large animal capable of avoiding detection for so long in well-explored areas would be interestingly intelligent...
Disclaimer: I work for a company, but I don't speak for them.
...it wasn't just a really hairy nigger?
welcome our giant lion-slaying ape overlords!
Also, in soviet russia, giant ape discovers YOU!
How does this affect me?
In either case, primates aren't discovered every day
I discover primates every day! Why, just today, I discovered a bus full of them. They made incessant noises and smelled funny, but they were indisputably primates. However, when I tried to mimic one of their mating rituals, I was physically assaulted, a very disappointing turn of events for science.
Mod down posts with a "Free Mac Mini/iPod" sig, they're spam!
Quick! Capture one so we can pit it against a silverback in an offshore knife fight!
There is speculation that it might be a gorilla/chimp hybrid species. I'm hoping the chimp was the 'giver' in that scenario.
"Study your math, kids. Key to the universe." -The Archangel Gabriel
(nt) stands for "no text"
Yet another stupid article for people post funny comments. (well, People to it in every article, so it doesn't matter.)
You really tried to read the article?
Zu Mangani bundolo numa? Rota!
Go here to translate from Ape to English.
The Moore-Murphy Law: The number of things that will go wrong will double every 2 years.
in memory of the U.S's most corrupt, warmongering, war-profiteering and criminal president.
some pro-primate groups have complained that this is unfair as it displays monkeys in a bad light.
pre-emptive strike, before they kill us all!
I know you are psychotic, but please make an effort.
New dish served in african and asian restaurants!
I'm still trying to figure out what people mean by 'social skills' here.
Same category as the 39 foot python I think.
d _3 355000/3355089.stm
http://news.bbc.co.uk/cbbcnews/hi/animals/newsi
These apes have not been 'discovered', they have simply been newly categorised. The idea that they have never been seen before is a nice idea but nonsense.
We may not like to think it, but the world is a small place now. There are no really remote places anymore and the idea that there are big animals roaming around somewhere unseen and undiscovered is a romantic notion which might be reassuring but can't hide the simple sad truth that the number of species is diminishing daily as we trash the planet.
I'm sorry, but your ( and my ) unrelenting consumption is killing off wildlife apace. Don't let stories like this one make you think otherwise.
Better read quick before mods get here and mod me down. ;)
Still need a Gmail invite? I'm feeling generous.
Facts Concerning the Late Arthur Jermyn and His Family by HP Lovecraft.
Da Blog
"If this had been a bluff charge, they would have been screaming to intimidate us. These guys were quiet. And they were huge. They were coming in for the kill. I was directly in front of them, and as soon as they saw my face, they stopped and disappeared."
I wonder what kind of face she has ?
Chimpanzee's do employ natural objects in order to get maggots in trees. I just want to know, how do these apes kill lions? Do they use stones? Jaws of animals? Sure they can probably use their fists, but if they used tools, well it'd certainly be something noteworthy.
It is hardly a discovery if the locals already knew it existed.
Just because *we* didn't know it existed doesn't qualify it as being "newly discovered".
Hmm, I think the APE is called a Librarian, they usually roam the L-space, but sometimes even they get lost.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
strange primate?
...
kills lions?
I think they're called Home Sapiens, they've been around for a while.
maybe if we give them an infinite number of typewriters, they'll recreate the source for windows?
~men are from earth. women are from earth. deal with it.~
I can see a made for TV movie coming from this.
Most apes are curious creatures , the ones which are more intelligent are more cautious observers than curious imitators.
A strange creature that walks on two feet, carries a metal paddle that kills , and kills adult elephants is a creature to be afraid of (oh, I'm talking about the average african explorer).
Truthfully speaking , any sufficently intelligent species which closely observes humans in actions have everything to be afraid of them . Lions are comparitively innocous compared to a human . Even tigers turn tail and run from humans looking at them (or relatively good facsimilies of a face).
It takes brains, learning and experience to figure that out .Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur
There were some scientists
Trying to figure out the sasquatch riddle
Then they figured out
it was a missing link
Uh huh
"In search of sasquatch"
That was a kick ass "In search of.."
With Leonard nimoy
kicking out the jams
Ow
He captured imaginations
of people all around the globe
His name was "sasquatch," so I'm told
His legend's ancient
in the ancient scribe
Of the Indian tribe (apache tribe)
Scientists have proven that the sasquatch,
he is real
Take a look at the plaster cast of his foot,
now you know he's real
Listen real close to the audio tape,
not human!
now you know he's real
Couldn't be a man in gorilla suit
no fuckin' way man you know he's real
Real real real-real real real really-real real
Sasquatch: Tell Tenacious D "They were kick-ass"
Guy: And who should I tell them said that?
Sasquatch: Tell them it was Sasqua... Tell them it was a friend.
Guy: OK.
(Audience din)
(Classical music plays serenely over sasquatch's walking and moaning)
(Classical music abruptly ends, Sasquatch reappears)
Sasquatch: You know what... you better tell them it was Sasquatch. They won't know what friend you're talking about.
Guy: Ok, Sure.
Sasquatch: See ya.
I only smoke baboons.
(Probably obscure Goon Show reference)
n/t
may this be a new primate but a semi-intelligent one at that. Evidence shows these apes actually possess laptop computers, internet connections, and are notorious for posting "first post" and "3 steps to profit" comments on nearly every Slashdot thread.
It might be the next step in evolution of man (or maybe woman)...
Video
Shaquille O'Neal and Yao Ming would kung fu their asses.
for the faint at heart, the link contains a lot of pictures, among them a rather disturbing picture of a semi decapitated ape with a lot of blood. Given how human they look, it might not be suitable for all.
The war with islam is a war on the beast
The war on terror is a war for peace
With some DNA tests, hopefully this confusing mystery can be cleared up.
Pictures here: here
http://www.welton.it/davidw/
Surprisingly, I would assume /.'ers to be avid browsers of the Internet. Obvious, that's not the case.
Cases of monkeys walking on two legs, or Humanzees, are well known to science.
It is believed to be a result of brain damage during illness.
This post encoded with ROT26. If you can read it, you've violated the DMCA. Handcuffs please, sergeant.
It has a cousin in the US.
It's interesting how the Animal Planet and Telegraph stories differ to the point of contradicting each other. Animal Planet makes these animals sound docile and peaceful, and only make a single mention about killing lions :
tales that the forests were inhabited by large ferocious apes that could kill lions.
The BBC also only makes one mention about killing lions:
capable of killing lions.
There's a big difference between "capable" and "does". Elephants can kill lions too, but that doesn't make them "Lion Killers", which is how the Telegraph article refers to these chimp-apes:
known to locals as the "lion killer"
Locals told him about giant apes with a reputation for killing lions, New Scientist magazine reports today.
The Telegraph portraits them as violent and aggressive:
The creatures are far larger and more aggressive than normal chimpanzees
they are unusually aggressive chimps
While Animal Planet describes them quite differently:
Unlike gorillas, which invariably charge when they see a threat, these apes turn around and silently slip away into the forest when encountered, Ammann said.
That doesn't sound too aggressive to me, for an animal that is supposed to go around killing lions for sport. Why for sport? Because they obviously don't eat them, according to Animal Planet:
Feces recovered from the nest sites indicated an animal with a diet rich in fruit, which is typical of chimps.
Rather odd to have such an aggressive and competent killer that doesn't eat meat. Either reporters are putting a big spin on this, or researches are trying to pique as much interest as possible to raise funding.
Dan East
Better known as 318230.
That doesn't happen, does it? Species only disappear (entirely due to evil humankind). We don't get new ones anymore; that stopped just before history began. No?
All I know is that if these things are found with large stone paddles, I am putting down a Laser based Supercomputer on my Christmas List.
One other thing I would be looking forward to was a new attack dog to guard it.
~~~~ No One knows What It Is Like To Be The Bad Man, To Be The Sad Man, Behind Blue Eyes. ~~~~
There is a video of this Giant Ape here
Why is the above post modded as 100% overrated when it hadn't even been rated yet? It's funny, maybe not *that* funny, but not worth being labelled as overrated.
What's wrong with the moderators at this site?
See what you run into if you trek 2000 miles through Africa's forests. Remote is an understatement...
/ 08/01/html/ft_20010801.5.html
/ 08/01/sights_n_sounds/media.5.2.html
3 23_megatransect2.htmlventure/0107/fay/
http://magma.nationalgeographic.com/ngm/data/2001
http://magma.nationalgeographic.com/ngm/data/2001
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2001/03/0
That's not an ape, it is Jimmy Joe Bob from across town. He went on vacation down there and has not come back yet.
Judguing from their sexual habits, humanabo is more likely.
Beagle, beagle...
http://64.203.97.121/images/gallery/19.jpg http://64.203.97.121/images/gallery/19.jpg
This chimp is reportedly so huge that it can "kill a lion", yet if the dimensions reported in the story are correct, at "up to two meters tall (6.5 feet) and weigh between 85 and 102 kilos (187 and 224 pounds)", I can think of many humans, especially those in sports like bodybuilding, weightlifting, and basketball who are taller, heavier, and possibly more agile (even, Jordan can fly!). Heck, I've personally been friends with humans bigger than those numbers.
I don't know how it would kill a lion. I pircutred a pack kill but I know that a lion wouldn't attack a pack.
Would an unarmed human be able to kill a lion? what about those people (er, the christians!) who were thrown to the lions in Roman entertainment? were there ever any reports of an unarmed man bare-handedly killing a lion?
Erik Estrada spotted in the wilds of the Congo?
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
From snpp.com:
Bart: Here we go. Kwyjibo. [places his tiles] K-W-Y-J-I-B-O. Twenty-two points, plus triple-word-score, plus fifty points for using all my letters. Game's over. I'm outta here. [gets up]
Homer: [grabs Bart with his left hand, holding a banana in his right]
Wait a minute, you little cheater!
You're not going anywhere until you tell me what a kwyjibo is.
Bart: Kwyjibo. Uh... a big, dumb, balding North American ape. With no chin.
Marge: And a short temper.
Homer: I'll show you a big, dumb, balding ape! [leaps for Bart]
Bart: [making his escape] Uh oh. Kwyjibo on the loose!
If we need tissue samples to get a full analysis, then why not just kill one of them? Note: one, not go into a buffalo slaughter frenzy. If the population is so small that it can't lose one individual, then they're boned anyway.
I'm rather minded to believe that the whole mystery serves as a useful way to keep your funding rolling in.
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
Remember, folks this is the same part of the world where they have their own version of the Lock Ness Monster, Mokele Mbembe. As a Peace Corps volunteer in Congo-Brazzaville, I heard a lot about it. National Geographic couldn't get guides to take them into the swampy area northwest of the Congo river once the guides heard what they were looking for.
Mokele Mbembe is reported to kill elephants. As to the whole killing a planes lion when this is a jungle ape, lions and elephants live in forested areas as well.
...has anyone seen my Dad lately? He left for Mossaka over 2 weeks ago and forgot his razor.
Veritas patesco per quaestio questio. Truth is revealed through questions.
Dr. Evil: Yes, but are they ill-tempered?
...That we could attach to their fricken heads?
Number 2: Yes, and they have special jewels that make laser beams...
Dr. Evil:
Why does it matter if we "wipe them out", your coveted religion of evolution says nature will Just Make More!
I wouldn't bother with .300 Win Mag in Africa, especially hunting predatory large mammals. You need one-shot-drop power and the ability to keep a decent distance. Plus you might have to stop a charging Rhino or elephant, and .300 Win Mag doesn't cut it.
.458 Winchester round, which carries a brush-clearing 510 grain slug and delivers a devastating 4700 ft lbs of energy at muzzle velocity. It will drop dead any animal native to this planet under 100 yards.
.375 H&H Magnum -- less muzzle energy than the .458, but better long-range ballistics. Overpenetration on soft targets might be an issue at close ranges due to the higher muzzle velocity.
.500 magnum round which delivers a breathtaking 2500 ft lbs of energy at the muzzle. .454 Casull would be your alternative option here. There may be some advantage to a Desert Eagle chambered for .50AE -- since it's a gas semi-auto, quick reloads and lighter recoil from a magazine might compensate for "only" 1600 ft lbs of energy (recoil from the .454 Casull *killed* a 12 year old when he tried firing one...)
.375 in my truck (or have someone else carry it for me), keep the .458 loaded and in my hands, the shotgun on a sling and probably the DE .50AE with 2 spare mags on my side.
The safari standard is of course the
A secondary option would be
For backup, you might consider a gas-operated shotgun with extension tube loaded with 3" magnum rifled slugs. At panic ranges under 25 yards, 6 slugs ought to stop whatever's after you.
For so-close-I-can-hear-its-breath backup, something that can handle the newish S&W
I'd keep the
Kwyjibo
"Beware of he who would deny you access to information, for in his heart, he dreams himself your master."
I guess the "fully-grown" lion, figuratively AND literally, is going "Ape-Shit", for:
1. being threatened
2. being eaten
THAT is really about the ape getting it's "lion's share" of the food chain.
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
Having tons of energy won't do a bullet any good if it passes straight through what you're aiming at and doesn't hit anything vital.
.22 is capable of killing somebody, but other people have been hit with rockets and helicopter mounted heavy machine guns and lived. Hell, there were some survivors who were at ground zero in Hiroshima.
A
In describing her experience being "charged" by these animals in the wild, Shelly Williams said, and I found this quote interesting:
I'd hate to say that says a lot, but that says a lot.The Russians have won. They have made the world a cesspool of distrust, greed, fear and hate.
I remember watching a show that showcased the strength of chimps. Even though they're small, about the size of a kid, they are tremendously strong. Their arms don't look too muscular, but they're able to easily lift themselves up using one arm, and they can do it all day.
I also saw a video where they trained a chimp to do the bench press, and it benched something like 600 lbs.
They also showed chimps fighting lower forms of monkeys, and these chimps corned a monkey in a tree, and 2 chimps grabbed the arms of the monkey and ripped its body in half.
We are looking at animals. Do you quiver when you look at hamburger meat?
You sound a bit limp-wristed.
Not necessarily. There was no solid proof that the Coelacanth still existed until only a few years ago:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coelacanth
-operate an "Etch-a-Sketch"?
-paddle in a canoe
-do the samba
-remove hanging chads
Who is it who said:
"Given an infinite number of typewriters and an infinite number of chimpanzies, eventually you will get 'War and Peace'"?
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
First time I've ever done this, but when someone makes a good point, it is worth to bring it out to people with moderator points.
So, when validated, will this diverse creature warrant a name change?
-Grimp or Gorimp
-Chirilla (not quite chow-chilla nor chinchilla)
No, but seriously...
-Is there any muting of certain traits the individual species might have? For instance, would it be faster, meaner, more docile (other than eating full-grown lions, or getting it's daily supplement of a big dose of Vitamin-C (big cat), or would it lose an appetite for bananas or berries or the like?
-What would be the side-effects of cross-breeding these animals with the rambunctious monkeys in India? Would this breed be an abomination of the religious/cultural attachment? Would it survive in the land of India compared to trees and jungles? Are the monkey jails there strong enough for this near-sasquatch, or would they have to claymore the thing to put it down. (This side toward ape:)
-Would this be "transspecies" breeding? Would gee-dub-yah have a problem spending federal money on this (for weapons and DOD use, whereas he has a religious problem with abortion facilitated by federal money, even if they female's life is in danger, it appears...?)
-Does the genus or any material in the DNA allow for these animals to be crossbred? How long would it live? Would it threaten to rival the "let's clone-the-wooly-lamb" projects
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
The Stevus Ballmerus.
Damce. monkey boy, dance!
A humanzee is a hypothetical cross between human and chimpanzee. Just walking on two legs doesn't make a humanzee, though it may encourage people to claim that the upright animal is a humanzee.
Share and Enjoy: 09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0
Mind you I say this by typing it into a form on my umpteenth computer (most of them have been used, though, so in that respect I do my part I guess) and while preparing to hop in my dinosaur-burning ricemobile and drive all of five minutes to work. And, the idea of having the saying on a bumper sticker at all is pretty hilarious, given the effect that automobiles have on the world, amounting pretty much to unparalleled environmental damage.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
In either case, primates aren't discovered every da...
you must be joking. In the last couple of years we have found so many! One is the CEO of a Utah based company, another was even elected president!
--In either case, primates aren't discovered every day, making this a rare find indeed--
I see lots of new ones in the office daily.
the great grape ape!
Now THAT was one big GORILLILLA!
DEAD DEAD DEAD DELETE ME
Sorry.. couldn't resist.
It's interesting the comment in the Discovery article:
"Unlike gorillas, which invariably charge when they see a threat, these apes turn around and silently slip away into the forest when encountered, Ammann said."
This behavior alone could account for them remaining relatively unnoticed for so long.
Again on the Pygmies, Turnbull's book "The Forest People" is a first-hand account of Turnbull's experiences with the Pygmies of the Congo. In it, he describes how vast and uncharted the Congo forests still are, saying there are areas many hundreds of miles wide where only the Pygmies know well. And of course, the Pygmies don't have much to do with people from outside the forest.
It's nice to think of expansive lands right here on Earth that are still not within the long view of Us.
(read this a humorous junk science...)
Like Vulcans, THIS particular ape has a superprocessor gland which reprocesses fecal matter extremely efficiently. There is efficacy to this this modality. By extraction the most of the moisture, the condensed, ambient-temperature-dried fecal matter is less of a matter for this beast. Being a water-carrying creature, it has no need for humps on its back or breasts, as it can shed the containers as necessary.
Flight or Fight is probably not an issue for this king of the jungle, for if it can take down a full-sized, adult lion, it probably has no need to dump its bowels in one instance while running.
Possibly, the pellets can serve as "bread crumbs" for its own kind to keep up, or as a "bait and switch" lure for its prey. Prey dumb enough to follow THAT shit is prey that better pray.
By exploiting this quirk in nature, the whacky of presidents can authorize expenditures in the effort to have fewer sleepless nights "wond'rin' hwo to pertekt da 'merikun peep-hole"...
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
Just as long as I don't hear the word Humanzee brought up, I think I'll keep reading. Whoever would volunteer for that experiment is both a hero to genetic science and a complete and utter freak, and guess which of those two will be remembered most fifty years from now?
Don't leave out artificial insemination when considering lab creation of a chip/human hybrid. (And there are more than enough people who would do such things to creat an occasional hybrid "in the wild".) The main problem with a human/chimp "natural coupling" (other than cross-fertility) would be the hazard to the human partner, due to the extreme strength of the chimp. (This would make completion unlikely without an extremely cooperative or bound chimp, despite a possible plethora of perverts who might be willing to try.)
A gorilla/chimp or human/chimp hybrid that tended to mule out would explain the rarity of sightings. And a human/chimp hybrid might well become much larger and stronger than either parent, due to the hybrid vigor phenomenon.
Bantam Dominique roosters crow a four-note song. Once you've heard it as "Happy BIRTHday" you can't NOT hear it that way
ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
It is the Yeti, descended from the melting icefields of Kilimanjaro to walk among us. X-Day is right around the corner!
--
make install -not war
The point of attachment of the muscles and tendons to the bone. The attached points provide more leverage. Yours and my muscles attach to the very end of the bone where it pivots. Chimps and such have that tendon attached farther down thus providing more leverage and strength for a given muscle mass.
>>>>>> Chewie, take the professor in the back and plug him into the hyperdrive.
...and you thought all those pictures of Bigfoot were fake!!
Maybe these apes have the Bambi Gene and they smelled that she ate meat?
Maybe she has bad blood and they have keen sense of smell?
Maybe she had one hell of a bad hairdo (like a stormtrooper helmet)?
Maybe she flipped them the bird in (human) sign language?
Maybe she squated and paddled dirt and made noises?
Maybe she pitifully/pathetically cried and wailed and they figured, "Well, we don't have to eat EVERY human we encounter..."?
Maybe she threw something at them?
Maybe, maybe... Monday Monday
Maybe she sang a Cher, a Madonna, a Cindy Lauper, or Ella Fitzgerald song, (maybe the latter, and shattered their ear drums...)?
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
Hello !?
11 1101 1011111 0100 000 110 1011111 0101 10 01 1011111 101 1 011 1011111 0 1111 11 111 1011111 101
Has someone found the infamous Grape Ape?
Grape Ape, Grape Ape.
These are the "anthropoid apes" that adopted young John Greystoke after his parents died.
------ "Darn floor. Big bite." (Koko the gorilla's best attempt at explaining the experience of an earthquake.)
APES and other Animals:
APES:
-Maybe these bad boys cross-bred with the Apes of India... and supposing this, she hollers, "Yoni-Yoni-Yoni-Yoni.... kamasalila-saspanda..."
--Maybe they wanted "dark meat" that day, rib-less and skinless?
OTHER ANIMALS:
As for "as everyone that hunted once in their life knows, wild animals run like hell at the sight of humans, no matter how 'dangerous' the animals are, like tigers, lions and whatnot.."
Tell that to a co-worker of mine. He told me in that once in his younger days he and friends went hunting.
A wild pig appeared and his "Mr.-I'm-Tough" friend confidently takes aim and BLAST! Off goes some pig skin.
Pig keeps charging.
Friends head for the trees.
BLAM! off goes more skin, and a chunk of flesh.
Wild pig keeps charging.
Shooter furiously reloads. BLAM!
Off goes a chunk of pig eye. Pig keeps coming.
Shotgun jams or is ammoless.
Shooter drops shotgun and does what friends did: hauls ass into the neares climbable tree and stays there.
Pig rams tree, squealing, snorting, gushing blood a few minutes or longer. Eventually it dies from bleeding to death more than from that choice of shotgun used for hunting.
Not ALL animals fear and run from humans. Nor should they. They SHOULD chomp, rip or slas our encroaching asses at least ONCE in a while, right? Right!
I don't hunt, on land or at sea, but if I did, I'd only dive if I had a razor-festooned and cyanid-loaded, multi-layer suit that would poison the creature that ate me. I may dive to take pics, but not take a stabe at animal. They do what they have to do to eat. I'll do what I have to do to not be dessert, or deserted.
Maybe a Bruce-Dern-/Black Sunday-like black box filled with needels could "fleschette" an attacking shark and defuse that attack/charge. But, woe be unta any diving partners on the wrong side of the firing line...
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
Sing along: Shoop-a-shoop.. Chup, chup-chup Shoop-a-shoop:
m
- --------
- -------
m /the_almasti.htm
c om/the_yeren.htm
http://cryptozoo.monstrous.com/el_chupacabra.ht
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Some interesting drawings of animals here...
Any humus, umm, humans who look like this?
-----------
Yow-za Yow-za...
http://cryptozoo.monstrous.com/the_yowie.htm
-
yeti:
http://cryptozoo.monstrous.com/the_yeti.htm
--
SETI:...oops...
Almasti: Eww, that's NASty:
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http://cryptozoo.monstrous.co
Serendipity and the Yeh-ren dippity:
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http://cryptozoo.monstrous.
Previously: "Linux... Toward the Sunrise..." Now: "Linux... Toward the-- No, now, part of Every Sunrise"
1/3 of jokes get modded OT. If you get the joke, mod 1 in 3 insightful/interesting/underrated to restore karma balance.
tee-hee... only one measily pig? thats nothing... some dudes I know had to climb a tree to escape from a bunch of wild pigs (like 20 pigs), and they had to stay up there a loooong time because they did not have enough ammo to kill all the friggin pigs... :)
.44 magnum or even a .357... those dudes I mentioned had shitty shotguns and a .38cal revolver with little ammo.
those wild pigs are totally dumb and pretty furious... I should have stated that 'half-smart' wild animals fear men, it would be more accurate. and 'half-smart' surely excludes wild pigs (especially in large numbers!)
OTOH, you said your friends were carrying a shotgun... that was pretty dumb... shotguns are for killing birds and rabbits... if you go into the wilderness without a rifle at least carry a decent revolver, like a
``If a program can't rewrite its own code, what good is it?'' - Mel
oh, by the way, if you ever go into the wilderness, please DO carry a decent gun and enough ammo to defend yourself against that kind of stuff... even if you are a convict tree-hugger, at least carry an airgun and enough tranquilizer darts, and know what you are doing... being dismembered by a bunch of wild pigs is not funny!
cheers
``If a program can't rewrite its own code, what good is it?'' - Mel
Monkeys are funny
From reading the descriptions it sounds an aweful lot like bigfoot.
I am Bennett Haselton! I am Bennett Haselton!
That this new ape is a Democratic member of congress?
Sera
Slashdot, where armchair scientists get shouted down and armchair theologians get modded up.
Usually if that's the case, the tradeoff would be more leverage but slower speed.
But many animals are both stronger AND faster. An ounce of their muscle just seems to do more work than an ounce of ours. Maybe our muscles are just evolved to be more steady and precise, with the tradeoff of being weaker? Or maybe they're just more energy efficient?
I'm sorry, that term is already copyrighted for the next version of Phoenix...I mean Firebird...I mean Firefox...I mean...oh screw it.
Moderaters? You all stupid or asleep (or both)?
This is an obvious troll. Simple response is we haven't had this many extinctions in 65 million years. It's not natural. If you're going to be this silly, try putting uranium in your cereal for breakfast. After all, uraniums's part of the planet so it's natural food.
Moste likely, you'd be able to get alot of the DNA from hair or bits of dead skin left by the ape.
autopr0n is like, down and stuff.
Wookie. 2m tall, sounds about right. Large like a gorilla, but more like a chimp or orangutan? Yep, it's Chebacca alright.
--- "1.21 Jigawatts!" -Doc
Eventually all species will become extinct.
You didn't think this planet was going to last forever did you?
Lions think they have an easy meal and the poachers blow them away! Oldest trick in Africa!
So that's where my faded albino wookie costume disappeared too...
[Now, I'm off to lift my le... Um, visit... at another place.]
awww great thats all us Humans need......more competition.
It's probably a Democrat voter as well.
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
How can we be sure it's not just Homer Simpson lost in the Congo?
On vit, on code et puis on meurt.
The CLF (Cthulhu Liberation Front) approves this message.
Though killing a lion might be more than he can do.
Each species is so rare that is in practice invaluable.
What you are suggesting is to dilapidate our natural heritage because we are too lousy to organize ourselves to protect it properly and take advantage of it.
What a lame proposition, to dilapidate because we ignore how much we have.
IANAL but write like a drunk one.
"Hold it bob, we can see your watch."
Send lawyers, guns, and money!
And you are going to die eventually, so I guess that means that pushing you into harms way (lets say an stampede of 2000 lemmings) is not immoral.
IANAL but write like a drunk one.
Blah.
You are going to die eventually.
I guess that makes it perfectly ok and moral to get rid of you.
And if that is on my best interst, I should just go ahead and do it. Like with those pesky trees.
Great philosophy that of yours buddy.
IANAL but write like a drunk one.
Cocroaches are vey resilient.
And so are bacteria.
That would be a tep backwards of 1 billion years I think.
No big deal I suppose buddy.
IANAL but write like a drunk one.
Any time an animal is about to become extinct, the environmentalists should convince the restaurant industry that the animal tastes good. That way, the evil corporations would be "tricked" into funding breeding programs. They would have a vested business interest in ensuring the species' survival. Are chickens or cows going to be extinct any time soon? I, for one, am looking forward to a McChimp Deluxe or Gorilla Whopper. Long live the primates. Now pass the A1 sauce.
And I don't mean by marriage, either.
There is nothing a shot gun can't do at close range that a 38 44 375... can do... You just use a slug and not bird/rabbit shot. With a shot gun it's all about the ammo you put into it.
It must be this monkey (S.Ballmer monkey dance)t er4.html
http://homepage.mac.com/jpbarr/iMovieThea
Don't we see couple of them on CNN everyday, :-) ???
chanting nine-one-one and justifying their 'chimp'ing in Iraq
As for the Casull, great gun, but no way I am getting close enough to a lion to take a handgun shot.
Oh, and you jokers who think a single ape can take a lion, LOL. I've seen video of a 100-lbs mountain lion jumping a 6-foot fence with a 100-lbs akita in its mouth. Now imagine a 400-lbs lion. Strong as apes are, nothing matches a cat's strength and agility, pound-for-pound (jumping spiders and ants excepted).
Slashdot "libertarians": Small government for me, big government for those I disagree with. -1, I disagree with you