Slashdot Mirror

You mean like The Kindle Flare.

>taking [feces] orally

Dog Urine Lowers Heart-Attack Risk, Say Snickering Researchers

...suck your dick?

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

I think the solution is obvious.

Almost a year exactly.

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Thank you for that insightful and informative comment which has added so much to the discussion.

Oh, wait, no it didn't, you just wanted to remind everyone that you don't own a television.

Pretty sure my 1080p 42 inch HDTV counts as a TV.

Although it is true many scientists don't own TVs, to minimize distractions.

Thank you for that insightful and informative comment which has added so much to the discussion.

Oh, wait, no it didn't, you just wanted to remind everyone that you don't own a television.

Here :) http://www.theonion.com/video/apple-introduces-revolutionary-new-laptop-with-no--14299

the onion

This guy even pushed the Italy button -- what lovesick middle aged woman doesn't dream of some crazy Tuscan romance fantasy?

Or, not even middle-aged, if you're willing to stretch your imagination a little.

He's actually referring to this famous Onion article:
http://www.theonion.com/blogpo...

Obligatory Onion video (one of their best); http://www.theonion.com/video/...

Hey, left-turner could actually learn from that video: "Look out the windshield. When you see a pedestrian over there, don't drive to that place."

I think the Onion Got it Right "Report: 98 Percent Of U.S. Commuters Favor Public Transportation For Others" http://www.theonion.com/articl...

The Onion, fifteen years ago, published what is still the most accurate article about public transportation ever written http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Still doesn't beat http://www.theonion.com/video/...

Obligatory Onion video (one of their best);
http://www.theonion.com/video/...

Nobody's trying to "smear" GamerGate, we read what you write in your own words on 8chan, /r/KIA, and under the #gamergate hashtag.

A movement with no spokesmen, which communicates primarily through venues that enforce total anonymity by default is awfully convenient for those who would use "their words" against them, since any 15-year old child on his smartphone can - and will - be held up as representative of the entire group. This is simply an extension of the "cyber-bullying" cause, where people try to conflate toss-off statements posted anonymously on the internet with serious and credible death threats. Through an anonymous, geographically remote medium like an imageboard, the possible consequences of saying nearly anything are almost nonexistent - so people say whatever they can, just because they can. It takes little wherewithal, conviction or true feeling to type "you are bad and deserve to be raped," whereas making the same threat in person almost guarantees a visit from stern men in institutional blue; which is why they're taken seriously - the motivation required to prompt it must be that much more severe. The personalities at the center of this "Gamergate" fracas make a policy of conflating the former with the latter to enhance their claims of victimhood - and if the baseless internet trashtalk isn't pouring in fast enough, they'll start actively baiting the trolls themselves.

Your entire movement started when Adam Baldwin tweeted links to YouTube videos smearing a female game dev's sex life because her ex-boyfriend wanted to run a hate campaign against her.

It sure did! And if said dev had replied in a different fashion, it would've been utterly forgotten by now. I've got a bachelors in Journalism, and I can tell you that absolutely nobody with a quarter of a brain or over the age of 20 is at all surprised that industry publications are little better than shills for the advertisers that provide all their income. The difficulty of monetizing online journalism (a task even major, respected mainstream news publications have struggled with) almost guaranteed it'd be even worse for online gaming websites. It's not exactly breaking news to anyone. It should've been a minor story only a few cared about, and died a quiet death when the muddy nature of the allegations became clear.

But that's not what happened.

What happened was a game developer resorting to moral fiat argument; i.e. my critics are sexist and thus automatically evil and wrong. At a stroke this transformed the issue; it went from some nobody indie dev arguing with nobody internet nerds to An Attack On Women. This alone polarized the issue and involved a massive preexisting base of communities, activists and political context (which was the goal, of course.) But what really blew the flames into a forest fire was the obvious collusion and outright slander by the gaming news sites being criticized: they all published "gamers are dead" articles arguing that "gamer culture" had been completely overtaken by sexism and misogyny, the implication being that anyone who identified as a "gamer" (i.e. all the people criticizing them,) was by definition a sexist, misogynistic bastard, and their opinions could and should be rejected out of hand.

This kind of argument tactic is nothing new in the political sphere - moral fiat arguing backed by complicit media outlets is a staple of left-wing strategy, as best evidenced by theCindy Sheehan phenomena. I've watched it in action for years. But when I was writing political op-eds on a home-grown website run by me and a few highschool friends, all my peers were playing Halo tournaments

Man, what did that kitten do to you? Seriously, it's in the past; just let it go. ;^)

Kitten Thinks of Nothing but Murder all Day

Well, apologies for not spotting that. I allowed my automatic assumption that there was no possible good reason for doing this to lead me to not checking the text.

That said, I still can't see any good reason for doing this. "Management-imposed restraints" could mean anything. Does "management" think two 5 minute videos costs less in bandwidth than one 10 minute video?

Was "management" perhaps previously in charge of disposable razor marketing?

http://vanilla-js.com/ is probably much more worth learning and using. The *ONLY* reason to be using jQuery is for IE8 support, but I've long since required IE9+ for all freelance work I do, and do everything in CSS and Vanilla JS now.

This always sounds to me like a story from The Onion: "Area Programmer Constantly Mentioning He Doesn't Use JQuery"

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

Don't be too harsh on him. As The Onion says, he realizes that one day he will be portrayed as the villain in an Oscar-winning movie.
http://www.theonion.com/article/scalia-thomas-roberts-alito-suddenly-realize-they--32972

...and the obligatory Onion

http://www.theonion.com/blogpo...

You are the video game version of this guy

Once upon a time, five blades was satire:
http://www.theonion.com/blogpo...

The Onion has reported the new TSA plan:

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

I think it'll be much better than the previous one.

We're doing 9 kidneys.

You and this guy would probably get along well.

I wonder if The Onion had ever published a story about real life people or new organizations referring to Onion stories as if they were true?

abcnews has such an article. The article includes lots of good links, including a link to the Onion FIFA article.

Archaeologists Discover First Hominid To Own Tools But Never Use Them

Kids need to know the difference between verifiable reference material and crap. Just because more people agree with one view on a forum or comments section doesn't neceesarliy make it a fact. Foxnews.com is a perfect example of this.

Example: O'Reilly is extremely popular, but he competes against crap on the other news networks. And he's a moron. Actually that's an important lesson: If you are presentable and well spoken, you can make lots of money on TV, even if you are a moron.

So is MSNBC.com

It's like the TV version of The Onion.

Just because it's on wikipedia doesn't mean it's true.

Wikipedia FAQ actually states the they don't care about the "truth", only that the information is referenced to published sources.

Learn critical thinking and be able to know what questions to ask and where to go to find out. Kids know how to use the hardware - they need to engage the wetwear.

http://www.theonion.com/video/apple-introduces-revolutionary-new-laptop-with-no

In this case, yes:

http://www.theonion.com/articl...

One of the best pieces of satire ever created. Also the single greatest case ever made for the necessity of both blasphemy and obscenity.

Organise a "draw Jesus sodomizing Mary" contest in Texas and you'll get crazy Christian jihadists doing the same thing.

No, you wouldn't. You really, really wouldn't.

If you set up an event specifically designed to insult/offend/antagonise a particular religion, you're always going to get a response like this from someone.

Please stop spouting nonsense: http://www.theonion.com/articl... (NSFW)

That's the level of deliberate stirring we're seeing and it is designed to get a response - bbq in synagogue level squared.

You need to get your... *something* re-calibrated. I recommend the Onion (NSFW): http://www.theonion.com/articl...

If I was in law enforcement in that place I'd make them have their international trollfest way out in the desert so bystanders don't get killed if someone takes the bait.

I'm not exactly the biggest fan of the Texan way of life but in this case I would love to see the exact opposite--jihadi honeypots. Highly visible, everyone armed, fewer visible security guards.

I'm pretty shocked how quickly people jump to censoring ideas they don't agree with in this society. The irony of so many people on a public forum like Slashdot advocating for complete censorship of speech they find distasteful or wrong is thick. I would say there is a new mood to suppress opposing ideas, but I think history shows that there is nothing really new about it. Still, The Onion covered this sentiment pretty thoroughly the other day.

Trescott University president Kevin Abrams confirmed Monday that the school encourages a lively exchange of one idea. “As an institution of higher learning, we recognize that it’s inevitable that certain contentious topics will come up from time to time, and when they do, we want to create an atmosphere where both students and faculty feel comfortable voicing a single homogeneous opinion,”

Obligatory: One Idea.

I saw your post title, and was super confused. Normally when someone says "Link to the Onion", it looks more like, say, this.

That was my reaction, too.

[reference]

"Fuck Everything, We're Doing 4K"... (reference)

Why do it half-assed?

Wow. You sound inordinately passionate about April 1st. If such articles are so much to your liking, perhaps it's you who needs to go elsewhere. May I suggest America's Finest News Source?

As for this site, the motto used to be "stuff that matters". When April Fools articles become so numerous, it's no longer amusing. It's like the same joke being told over and over again. April Fools is not a "huge holiday". It's a day literally intended for fools, and only a fool finds the same joke funny time after time.

Well, this is the 2nd article on the homepage, so yeah, it does look like they are going with factual stories today.

Ever read, say, The Onion?

http://www.theonion.com/video/...

The irony is that I have seen this before yet now it asks for money because I've reached a limit of the amount I can consume from theonion for one day, and they don't offer downloads for consumption at convenience.

Quite an appropriate source of satire when discussing DRM.

In Uber... you get a new, higher end black car or SUV

Reading comprehension issues, much? The study compared UberX, not Uber Black or any of the other higher tier Uber offerings.

As long as we're taking note of higher-tier Uber offerings, let's not forget this one.

http://www.theonion.com/video/...

If only they had those chemicals back...

The reason, not excuse, to execute someone is simple, they've executed someone else themselves. This isn't a difficult concept really.

As always, The Onion says it best.