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I have an idea. How about a giant catapult to fling things into space? That would be cool!

Bush wants us to go back to the moon so Red China won't be able to control all the green cheese.

How much will the portable version cost?

And Nintendo themselves don't get the WeeWii.

I'll bet that the White Knight is expensive to operate. Maybe NASA should use the X-4000 to launch the X-37 once they are done with these tests.

On the moon, The X-4000 Launch Aparatus might actually work as a launch vehicle.

Actually, its aluminum foil hats that don't work. It is hard to find, but if you can get real tin foil it does work. It also keeps the V-Chip from spying on you if you line the inside of your TV with it.

Beagle 2 was about to discover something it wasn't supposed to see, so the Zhti Ti Kofft blew it to hell.

A few years ago when RFID was still too expensive, the paranoid were sure "The Mark" would be a tattoo. Now, it doesn't have to be visible. All the "crazy" things the paranoid used to fear and reasonable people used to laugh at are becoming real. It makes poking fun at conspiracy theory a lot less enjoyable.

By the way, I think peyeote is generally drunk like a tea, not smoked.

By the way, I think peyeote is generally drunk like a tea, not smoked.

As soon as I can find those buggers, I'm doing my whole house for personal security. All the government spying devices will be rendered useless. Take that, Big Brother!

AOL's customers are mostly technically illiterate morans who need to get a brain, and old people who had a computer pushed on them by their children or grandchildren. Some of them even fell for the 2 free months with no commitment promotion only to be driven insane.

What the article didn't reveal was that Toy Story 3 was full of adult jokes that the MPAA was going to have a fit over. Here is an example.

Using nuculer shit will definately provoke the Zhti Ti Kofft. They might even turn the dark side of the moon around to face us and use their death ray!

Bush had a tizzy, and insisted that America must return to the moon when he learned that the Chinese were planning to go. Now that the Russians are thinking the same thing and even want a permanent base, can he get to the green cheese in time?

If anyone is still wondering where the any key is, wonder no more!

William Smythe says "Leave my little buddy Scruffy alone, you dirty hackers!"

Don't forget about these gems:

Canada and Denmark at the Brink of War

Rumsfeld and Wolfowitz are Vampires, W Ketchup Contains Blood

Fed up with Huricanes, Miami Dolphins Moving to Wichita

Don't forget about these gems:

Canada and Denmark at the Brink of War

Rumsfeld and Wolfowitz are Vampires, W Ketchup Contains Blood

Fed up with Huricanes, Miami Dolphins Moving to Wichita

Don't forget about these gems:

Canada and Denmark at the Brink of War

Rumsfeld and Wolfowitz are Vampires, W Ketchup Contains Blood

Fed up with Huricanes, Miami Dolphins Moving to Wichita

They are trying all kinds of crazy stuff since the loss of Saskra Root ruined the taste of Coke Classic.

Forget about it! The underground ice is used by the Zhti Ti Kofft in their underground cities to keep their beer cold. They aren't going to let you melt it and evaporate it into the air!

Indeed! If you want a real tinfoil hat, you need tin. Aluminum will not do the job.

...And once machines can predict what will be popular, the labels will just have machines make the music. You don't have to pay robots.

People will refer to aluminum foil as tin foil, but they are not the same. Make sure you get the real McCoy. The Uncoveror reported thisquite some time ago. Tin foil hats work. Aluminum foil hats do not.

The term, "martian" is one they find offensive and will not answer to. They are the Zhti Ti Kofft. If the other planets have life on them, I doubt that they accept the names terrans made up for them either.

You will have to ask the Zhti Ti Kofft. They have a base there with a giant death ray, so the moon and all its green cheese are for all intents and purposes theirs unless someone is strong enough to take it from them.

You will have to ask the Zhti Ti Kofft. They have a base there with a giant death ray, so the moon and all its green cheese are for all intents and purposes theirs unless someone is strong enough to take it from them.

The feds have a new toy, and they insist on playing with it. Their promises about anti skimming technology are hollow. It won't stop terrorists from using an illicit RFID reader to pick out the Americans. They might as well just paint red white and blue targets on us! I have written about this and written about this.

The feds have a new toy, and they insist on playing with it. Their promises about anti skimming technology are hollow. It won't stop terrorists from using an illicit RFID reader to pick out the Americans. They might as well just paint red white and blue targets on us! I have written about this and written about this.

The Uncoveror predicted that this was coming when they did it to rats!

There is more wrong with the whole idea of a space elevator than the speed limit. The X-4000 Launch Apparatus is more likely to actually work.

Of course Mars was once a lot like earth. Martians lived on the surface then, but are now underground. Not only have they built underground cities on their planet, they even built a base and a death ray on our moon!

Of course Mars was once a lot like earth. Martians lived on the surface then, but are now underground. Not only have they built underground cities on their planet, they even built a base and a death ray on our moon!

The real reason that they are getting rid of everyone at the Jet Propulsion Lab is that they won't need jet propulsion any more with the X-4000 Launch Aparatus. They will be starting up the Spring Tension and Extention of Rope Laboratory, or STERL.

Solar flares may protect astronouts from cosmic rays, but will provide no defense against death rays or destructo-rays!

Solar flares may protect astronouts from cosmic rays, but will provide no defense against death rays or destructo-rays!

The whole reason he wants to go back to the moon is so Red China can't control all the green cheese.

Human labor producing the power to run computers instead of fossil fuel? That has been suggestd before. Read More.

Do you think they could get a payload to the ISS with this? It would sure be cheaper than the shuttle.

Here is another link that n00bs should find informative.

The X-4000 Launch Aparatus would be cheaper and easier to build than the Space Elevator. It would also be more likely to actually work.

Wow, yeah. And let me be the first to thank you for uncovering this explosive evidence. It rates right up there with your hard-hitting expose on the CULT TO SACRIFICE VIRGINS AT MOUNT SAINT HELENS piece.

Is there any chance that this is the guy who drinks quite a bit at Redmond area bars, then starts to talk about things like "kill code" to force upgrades and future versions of Windows? Stranger things have been true before.

Is there any chance that this is the guy who drinks quite a bit at Redmond area bars, then starts to talk about things like "kill code" to force upgrades and future versions of Windows? Stranger things have been true before.

In the paper 'picking virtual pockets using relay attacks on contactless smartcard systems' by Avishai Wool and Ziv Kfir, it has been shown that a simple relay attack on RFIDs is feasible, and the range of those cards can be maliciously extended.

Here's a link to the paper:
http://eprint.iacr.org/2005/052.pdf

and from http://www.uncoveror.com/rfid2.htm

...
The manufacturers of these devices insist that they have a limited range, but hackers have always been able to build antennas to extend the range of any wireless device. Sometimes a simple Pringles can, a coax connector and a soldering iron are all they need to rig one up. A similar home-brewed contraption was how they got Paris Hilton's address book. Also, if a hacker, mugger or terrorist's RFID reader is too far away from a chipped passport, it can always piggyback data from a legitimate reader, and no one will ever know. ...

Why does Bush want to go back to the moon? Why really? To keep Red China from controlling all the green cheese.

So, the Beast of Belgium will actually be in the Netherlands? I wonder if they got any of their ideas for this program from Total Information Awareness?

Instead of for transport, big baloons and dirigibles will be used for surveillance! Imagine a huge blimp using clouds as camouflage! It is watching us all more closely than any satellite, and we don't know they are there. They will be like floating death stars!