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Microsoft's iLoo Project A Hoax

minesweeper writes "It appears that the 'iLoo,' a portable toilet with Internet access designed by Microsoft, was actually just a hoax issued by its MSN division in the United Kingdom. In addition to receiving press here on Slashdot, the fake release was also covered by The Wall Street Journal, The Associated Press, and Reuters. See a diagram of the iLoo here."

214 of 311 comments (clear)

  1. load of crap by Cally · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...as I said at the time. Boom, boom!

    --
    "None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." -- Goethe
    1. Re:load of crap by squaretorus · · Score: 1

      no _shit_!

      ho ho ho - toilet joke _number two_, oops - was that the _turd_? I could _dump_ untold numbers of these on _slash_ dot. How _pish_!

    2. Re:load of crap by pkunzipper · · Score: 1

      If this concept ever becomes a relity, IT staff will have nowhere to hide from the helpless screaming employees.

    3. Re:load of crap by DyingBreed · · Score: 1

      iLoo + p0rn and IT staff will never leave the throne....

    4. Re:load of crap by jabailo · · Score: 1

      A m$ toilet does exist. It's called an Intel processor.

  2. a hoax? no crap.... by bchu · · Score: 1, Redundant

    did anyone really believe that?

    1. Re:a hoax? no crap.... by Old+Uncle+Bill · · Score: 1

      Yeah, I mean as soon as you see 6 channel surround sound... duh...

      --
      Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
    2. Re:a hoax? no crap.... by ChopsMIDI · · Score: 1

      "a hoax? no crap...."

      I love puns

      --

      How could I say to men: "Speak louder, shout! For I am deaf!"? -Ludwig van Beethoven
    3. Re:a hoax? no crap.... by Stalus · · Score: 1

      Apparently the guys that were actually working on it. In fact, no hoax at all. The claim of a hoax was apparently premature and uninformed. The project was real, but now it's just dead - obviously because of the poor PR it received. 'Uh, yeah.. we're not dumb enough to do that.. it was a hoax' *wink*.

  3. a hoax by greenalbatros · · Score: 5, Funny

    and if you were unfortunate enough to have fallen for it, your picture and whatever it was you did in there will soon be posted on the internet for the world to see. Trusted computing my arse

    --
    this sig steers like a cow. and i can prove it
    1. Re:a hoax by Fesh · · Score: 4, Funny

      I put some thought into it... I'd have called up goatse.cx as the last thing before exiting. Talk about leaving an unwelcome surprise in the toilet...

      --
      --Fesh
      Kill -9 'em all, let root@localhost sort 'em out.
  4. Yeah, but by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    unfortunately.. it turns out Longhorn wasn't a hoax. :(

    1. Re:Yeah, but by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      Still a joke nonetheless!

    2. Re:Yeah, but by Surak · · Score: 4, Funny

      Hmph. With no iLoo, where will users put there er, 'Longhorns'?

    3. Re:Yeah, but by CGP314 · · Score: 1

      Let's hope at least the new start bar that takes up a third of the screen is a hoax.

    4. Re:Yeah, but by Alien+Being · · Score: 1

      Bowels in motion
      Surak scores plus-five funny
      Blew my ass-gasket

  5. Well duh by Pingsmoth · · Score: 1, Interesting

    At the risk of a few karma points...

    seriously, a porta-potty with internet access? Come on. It was one of those things that's just too ridiculous to believe from the start.

    --
    http://www.walkingtaco.com
    1. Re:Well duh by ausgnome · · Score: 2, Interesting

      Well If i can have a fridge with internet access why not the toilet as well ??

      --

      I had a pet once
    2. Re:Well duh by POds · · Score: 2, Funny

      The fridge is usualy a clean place. Its supposed to preserve food. The toilet is a place you put food after its been digested. Something that germs like to cling too. Thats why you wash you hands after you've been. Its also why you should disinfect your tolite every once in a while.

      Its like the place to socialise, read the paper, or print out your stock reports on toilet paper.

      --


      Giving IE users a taste of their own medicine since 2005 - http://pods.-is-a-geek.net/
  6. Typical Microsoft by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    An April fool that's wayyy late.

    1. Re:Typical Microsoft by Dreetje · · Score: 2, Funny

      Duh, it was delayed cause it had some serious security bugs.

      Patches for this hoax can be downloaded at micro shit ;)

      --
      Dre
    2. Re:Typical Microsoft by banzai51 · · Score: 4, Funny

      Come on, when has MS ever hit a release date?

    3. Re:Typical Microsoft by Arielholic · · Score: 1

      Well in this case they shit a release date...

  7. dont read if you offend easily by daveatwork · · Score: 5, Funny

    sooo, not only do microsoft talk shit, they talk shit about making things that deal with shit, which end up being as useful as shit, because, in the end, its all shit... :-)

    1. Re:dont read if you offend easily by EvilTwinSkippy · · Score: 2, Funny
      ...its all shit...

      On that note, a quick comparive guide to religion:

      • Toaism: Shit Happens
      • Bhuddism: Bhudda Said, Shit Happens
      • Catholism: Shit happened because you are bad
      • Judiaism: Why does this shit keep happening to us?
      • Rhastafarianism: Let's smoke this shit
      --
      "Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
      --Dr.W.Edwards Deming
    2. Re:dont read if you offend easily by GNUman · · Score: 2, Informative

      And for an extended "shit happens" review:

      Shit Happens

    3. Re:dont read if you offend easily by Malcontent · · Score: 1

      Microsft lies. Honestly doesn't everybody already know this.

      --

      War is necrophilia.

    4. Re:dont read if you offend easily by EvilTwinSkippy · · Score: 1

      To be a slashdot admin, I'd have to repeat myself.

      --
      "Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
      --Dr.W.Edwards Deming
  8. First Post: I have new respect for Microsoft by Hiigara · · Score: 2, Funny

    They even say it to our faces "Your stupid, you believe everything we say, we can tell you this, and you'll still buy our OS for a hugely overpriced cost!". Well I guess at least the UK division has a sense of humor.

    I love you cowboy neal! Come back!

    1. Re:First Post: I have new respect for Microsoft by Hiigara · · Score: 1

      Thanks actually, I try to improve my grammer as best I can. I'll be sure to try and prevent that mistake again.

  9. Whoever's responsible... by worst_name_ever · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'm sure when they find out the name of the guy responsible for the hoax, his job will be flushed...

    --

    In Soviet Rush, today's Tom Sawyer gets high on you.
    1. Re:Whoever's responsible... by Daytura · · Score: 2, Funny

      Well, that's what happens if u-bend the rules.

      You can't beat the cistern.

    2. Re:Whoever's responsible... by SEWilco · · Score: 1

      Yeah, because now people might stop trusting what Microsoft says.

  10. Does that mean ... by dereklam · · Score: 4, Funny

    Does that mean the iLoo has gone down the toilet?

    1. Re:Does that mean ... by EvilTwinSkippy · · Score: 4, Funny
      No, just that the current marketing plans have been flushed.

      It will be all over the papers afterward.

      --
      "Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
      --Dr.W.Edwards Deming
    2. Re:Does that mean ... by SysadminFromHell · · Score: 1
      In 1000 years will this post be read as immortal wisdom or primitive ranting?

      Who gives a shit?

  11. Surround Sound by moonboy · · Score: 2, Funny

    Yeah, I thought the 6 channel surround sound was bit much.

    --

    Co-founder and designer at Music Nearby: http://musicnearby.com
    1. Re:Surround Sound by GNUman · · Score: 1

      Yeah, that'd work though, if you had complete plasma screen walls on the iLoo and you got a 360 degree view of a beach or something... then you'd feel you were way out of the city, in a very nice beach, away from the traffic and stress, with the sound of the waves, birds, the wind, and observing the horizon while... well, while you take a shit...

      Problem would be the smell thing... you'd need some heavy aromatizer (sp?) to give a beach impression...

  12. It is Fiction? by drwav · · Score: 3, Funny

    but... I thought reality was supposed to be stranger than fiction.

  13. Hrmmm.... by sdiver · · Score: 4, Insightful

    So what are the chances MicroSoft thought this was a legit idea upon releasing the concept, only to backpedal and say it was a "joke" a few days later? Seems like and odd joke to me...

    1. Re:Hrmmm.... by Lust · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Faked corporate press releases draw immediate attention (hence the /. article) but in the long-run only make publishers hesitant to post your legitimate stories. I suspect that upper management might be getting (or giving) an earful for this incident.

  14. so it turned out to be by ramzak2k · · Score: 1

    a poop dream....

    --

    Siggy Say, Siggy Do
  15. BSOD by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny
    Just imagine if they had made one and you had to
    take a 3-flusher. All of a sudden, BSOD. The bowl
    is full. You need to flush, but the flush control is a
    mouse click and you can't reboot (that's locked out
    by their new DRM controls so only the janitor
    can reboot). Stranded


    Or, could you imagine the germs on the mouse or
    trackpad. Or you were in New York where no one
    washes their hands. Or porn....

    1. Re:BSOD by Oddly_Drac · · Score: 2, Funny

      "Or, could you imagine the germs on the mouse or trackpad. Or you were in New York where no one washes their hands. Or porn...."

      I need to wash my porn?

      OD

      --
      Oddly Draconis
      Too cynical to live, too stubborn to die.
    2. Re:BSOD by zurab · · Score: 1

      Just imagine if they had made one and you had to take a 3-flusher. All of a sudden, BSOD. The bowl is full. You need to flush, but the flush control is a mouse click and you can't reboot (that's locked out by their new DRM controls so only the janitor can reboot).

      Fortunately this is easier than you have imagined. XP Pro would be running as a Guest account, so you would simply need to follow these steps:

      1. Close all windows (if any);
      2. Remove all shit from the bowl;
      3. Log out;
      4. Log back in;
      5. Put all the shit back in;
      6. Open windows (if any);
      7. Flush;
      8. If not successful, repeat from step 1.

  16. Also on CNN by TheMidget · · Score: 4, Informative

    click here (don't be afraid, it's not one of those links that are on-topic to this story in their own special way...)

  17. Not a totally bad idea. by Deathlizard · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Although having a Portable PC in a Porta-potty doesn't make much sense, it seems like a somewhat good idea in a permament environment.

    I mean realistically your going to be sitting down anyway and since your basicially a captive audience you might as well read up on the news or sports while your there. It's better than reading the writing on the wall.

    Of course a paper would be just as good, but something like this built into a wall would be more up to date. It doesn't really need to be interactive either. just run headlines, Sport Scores and Stock Market tickers.

    1. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by EvilTwinSkippy · · Score: 4, Insightful
      I just keep thinking of the study where computer keyboards were found to be dirtier than toilet seats...

      I mean, do you REALLY want to be handling a keyboard that was handled by the guy in front of you, who was ALSO in the process of cleaning feces off of his bottom. Hint, the sink and soap are NOT in the stall.

      --
      "Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
      --Dr.W.Edwards Deming
    2. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by POds · · Score: 1

      Dont know about you, but i like to spend as little time as possible in the loo. I know people who sit down and read the bloody paper. I dont understand why they do this. Whats so good about reading the paper in the crapa?

      --


      Giving IE users a taste of their own medicine since 2005 - http://pods.-is-a-geek.net/
    3. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by PhilHibbs · · Score: 1
      Of course a paper would be just as good, but something like this built into a wall would be more up to date.
      Or, combine the two, and have it print the info on the toilet paper. Sanitary concerns could be allayed by making it voice-activated, or maybe gesture-sensitive like the Heart of Gold's radio in H2G2.
    4. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      I've often wondered about this, and I think it is simply because some people take longer than others to drop a loaf. Some can force it out, but others have to let nature take it's course, so they have to sit there for ages and bring some reading material.
      In short, there are both passive and active shitters - to the active, the shitting is it's own reward. With passives, it is merely a distraction.

    5. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by Surreal_Streaker · · Score: 1
      Although having a Portable PC in a Porta-potty...

      That's a lot of PP.

    6. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by GutBomb · · Score: 2, Insightful

      hmm. i don't think people have that much of a habit of touching their own excreted solids and fluids. it reminds me of an old joke. a guy from colorado, a guy from nebraska, and a guy from utah are all in a bathroom peeing. the guy from wyoming finishes and goes to the sink. "In wyoming they teach us to wash our hands with warm water when we're done peeing." he then waits for the others at the doorway. The guy from nebraska finishes next, walks to the sink, and says "In nebraska they teach us to wash our hands with warm water and soap!" he washes then waits at the door. Finally the guy from colorado finishes and simply walks out without washing. He says to the other men "In colorado they teach us not to pee on our hands"

      Unless you think people are shitting and peeing on their hands (YUCK) why be worried about using the touch screen and keyboard?

    7. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by sisukapalli1 · · Score: 1

      This is a good place for speech interface or a touch keypad (one could always use some tissue to click on a link). Furthermore, bathroom reading may not need a lot of keyboard interactions.

      S

    8. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by Fear+the+Clam · · Score: 1

      Speech interface, huh? Quick, register "uuuuungh.com."

      Brings "cybersquatting" to a whole new level.

    9. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by Drakonian · · Score: 1

      Because sometimes shit happens man!

      --
      Random is the New Order.
    10. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by WeeLad · · Score: 1
      So what happened to the guy from Utah?

      --
      Seriously, Don't take anything I say seriously.
    11. Re:Not a totally bad idea. by jasonbw · · Score: 1

      The entire crotchal (is that a word?) area is a breeding ground for germs...its not really about dirt/feces/urine. Theres a great Straight Dope article about it

      http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a4_220.html

      that should explain why you should wash your hands.

      The second reason is, have you used a public bathroom? It's not like people are careful or anything (hell, they don't have to clean it up). Modern public toilets are all about remote sensors and the like...the less stuff you have to touch the better.

  18. ya know... by HBI · · Score: 1

    Microsoft really needs to get its shit together on PR.

    --
    HBI's Law: Frequency of calling others Nazis is directly correlated with the likelihood of the accuser being Communist.
    1. Re:ya know... by pkunzipper · · Score: 1

      No, PR doesn't matter, they rule the business OS world. They need to get their shit together on building future systems that are more stable with less DRM. Yesterday I spent all day staring at my desk because 2 servers that contain my DBs went to hell (Windows 2000 Server).

  19. So How Does This Affect by The+Dobber · · Score: 4, Funny


    The Open Source communities efforts to build a better shitter?

    1. Re:So How Does This Affect by aug24 · · Score: 4, Funny

      The OpenLoo project's stalled...

      --
      You're only jealous cos the little penguins are talking to me.
    2. Re:So How Does This Affect by MSBob · · Score: 2, Funny

      You mean blocked...

      --
      Your pizza just the way you ought to have it.
    3. Re:So How Does This Affect by sharkey · · Score: 2, Funny
      The OpenLoo project's stalled...

      However, KDE is still on track to provide Krapper 1.0 in their 3.1.2 release.

      --

      --
      "Outlook not so good." That magic 8-ball knows everything! I'll ask about Exchange Server next.
  20. Just a cover story they made up .... by selfsealingstembolt · · Score: 2, Informative

    ... after they realized everyone was making fun of their iLoo. So they just pulled it back.

    From the article:
    In an e-mail sent last week to The Associated Press, Red Consultancy's Ben Philipson wrote "MSN is really working on building a prototype for the Summer festivals, perhaps Glastonbury ... This is very much a 'toe in the water' experiment to gauge interest so we'll have to see how it goes, although judging from response so far it's really captured people's imagination!"

    Malina Bragg, who helps with MSN's account for Waggener Edstrom, also verified last week that the project was true.

    --
    Keep open minded - but not that open your brain falls out...
    1. Re:Just a cover story they made up .... by Zak3056 · · Score: 2, Funny

      This is very much a 'toe in the water' experiment

      There have been quite a few gross comments in this thread, but that takes the cake!

      --
      What part of "shall not be infringed" is so hard to understand?
  21. NPR has failed me. by InvaderSkooge · · Score: 1

    This was on NPR's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me last week. NPR got something wrong, now all my illusions are shattered. Next thing you know, it'll turn out that Click and Clack don't know exactly what's wrong with my car.

    --
    Erik
    YOU ARE SAYING IMPUDENCE TO ME! THAT IS IMPUDENCE!
  22. a hoax? surrrreee..... by rlthomps-1 · · Score: 1

    Yeah, the reaction of everyone laughing at it forced them to look for a way to back out of it. They're calling it a hoax after gettig a little free market research!

  23. Just me.... by jonnystiph · · Score: 2, Funny

    There seems to be some kind of coincednce here, XP in a portajohn.

    --

    If we don't make light of everything, we are just stumbling in the dark - Blank

  24. Thank God! by l0ungeb0y · · Score: 1

    I was starting to worry about getting a BSoD while trying to download my brownware.

    And don't even get me started about the built in DRM system to handle the secure "door locking" functionality and toilette paper access restrictions.

    1. Re:Thank God! by iapetus · · Score: 2, Funny

      Toilet paper? Didn't you realise that an integrated computer was the first step towards a paperless toilet?

      --
      ++ Say to Elrond "Hello.".
      Elrond says "No.". Elrond gives you some lunch.
    2. Re:Thank God! by No+Such+Agency · · Score: 1

      "trying to download my brownware"

      I assume you mean UPLOAD your brownware. If you like to "download" brownware, keep it to yourself, or write a letter to Savage Love. Don't tell us.

      --
      Freedom: "I won't!"
    3. Re:Thank God! by 0vi_king · · Score: 1

      ...Yeah, you have to use these three clam shells..

      It is kinda complicated..

      --
      - Life is what keeps you occupied while you are waiting to die
  25. Pretty obvious by Jeppe+Salvesen · · Score: 1

    Since when did Microsoft start making stuff named in British English? Good hoax, though.

    --

    Stop the brainwash

    1. Re:Pretty obvious by Gordonjcp · · Score: 2, Informative

      Yes, "Loo" from the company that *still* spells "colour" as "color" and "favourite" as "favorite" even when you select the UK English language settings? Come on guys, you're supposed to have this language thing sorted now.

  26. Perhaps a joke with a hidden message... by 192939495969798999 · · Score: 1

    Why would they want us to associate Microsoft and a toilet? Things that make you go "hmmm...."

    --
    stuff |
  27. My first clue was the release date... by Dave21212 · · Score: 2, Funny


    "due to be unveiled this summer"

    Since when has Micro$oft ever delivered a product in under 5 years ?

    It was obviously a hoax, just like Longhorn, .NET, MS Corporate IM, XML in Word, Server 2003 XML, Bob II....

    --
    "Whoever would overthrow the liberty of a nation must begin by subduing the freeness of speech."--Benjamin Franklin
    1. Re:My first clue was the release date... by afidel · · Score: 1

      Longhorn preview 1 has already been leaked, .Net framework is here and already in production at many site including microsoft.com, not sure about corporate IM, XML is in Word XP..it just really sucks balls, Server 2003 can do XML as well as any OS, and finally Clippy is Bob II and is just as freaking annoying as the origional (thank god he's dead in XP)

      --
      There are 4 boxes to use in the defense of liberty: soap, ballot, jury, ammo. Use in that order. Starting now.
    2. Re:My first clue was the release date... by iworm · · Score: 1

      In the context of this story I think we'd all prefer that the word "leaked" was left unused.

    3. Re:My first clue was the release date... by kzeddy · · Score: 1
  28. Your shitting me! by EvilTwinSkippy · · Score: 2, Funny
    I really think the "hoax" is PR's way of covering their ass. I think Bill was just pissed off about the reaction it recieved.

    This whole thing stinks, they knew it, and they wanted to wash their hands of the matter. Who wouldn't after the smear job it recieved. Talk about being caught with your pants down!

    --
    "Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
    --Dr.W.Edwards Deming
  29. Apple iTolete by POds · · Score: 3, Interesting

    i wonder if this was inspired by the Apple iToilet

    --


    Giving IE users a taste of their own medicine since 2005 - http://pods.-is-a-geek.net/
    1. Re:Apple iTolete by Shiranui · · Score: 1

      A Japanese guy made an image of iNax back in the old iMac days, which is even funnier.
      Since then, the site move away, but still some images can be found on Google.
      (INAX is a famous toilet company in Japan)

  30. It might have been a hoax, but this isn't! by Daath · · Score: 1

    Ish*t, is not active atm, but you can check out his setup, to let people flush his toilet from a browser ;)
    Here you can read a comparison of the internet and a toilet...
    Always amusing Onion, has an article on online sh*tting ;)

    Man, I gotta pull myself together and get some work done :P

    --
    Any technology distinguishable from magic, is insufficiently advanced.
  31. Imagine... by the_real_tigga · · Score: 1

    ... a beowulf cluster of those.

    No, seriously. Imagine that!

    --
    my .sig is better than yours.
  32. Microsoft BusinessPlan(tm) 2003 by KoolDude · · Score: 1


    1. Make news about some shitty product.
    2. Wait for all competitors to start similar projects.
    3. Call the project a hoax.
    4. Watch competitors go bankrupt.
    5. ???
    6. Profit!!!

    --
    getSexySig(); /* returns sexy signature */
  33. Shit by A+Proud+American · · Score: 5, Funny

    I guess this means I should cancel my GNUPoo project over at SourceForge.

    1. Re:Shit by lambwolf · · Score: 1

      I guess this means I should cancel my GNUPoo project over at SourceForge.

      GNUPoo, huh? Do you build with a "make in stall"?

    2. Re:Shit by Skevin · · Score: 1

      That was almost as bad as all the OS Nazis who will claim that the iLoo was first invented by Richard "Stall" Man.

      --
      "Twice half-assed makes an ass whole." --Solomon K. Chang
  34. Damn that 5ux0r5!! by Wo-Fat · · Score: 3, Funny

    I was looking forward to writing the W32/flusher.gen virus. I had all my plans in the works. Automatic flushing, and handwashing alarms....

  35. in another news by rasgefaanu · · Score: 1

    MSN internet division in UK announces that the announcement from MSN Redmond was a hoax as well.

    "This iLoo news which came out of the UK office was true and the project will go ahead as planned. It does not have to be Microsoft sanctioned communication and we apologize for any confusion or offense it may have caused."

  36. Really? by bigfatlamer · · Score: 2, Funny

    A hoax? No way! I already bought my plane tickets and passes to ever music festival in the UK this summer just so I could check my email from an shit covered keyboard in an outhouse.

    Damn...now what am I going to do?
    BFL

    --
    There's one thing computing teaches you, and that's that there's no point to remembering everything.
    --Doug Copland
  37. Excellent, now Apple can make one... by Ayandia · · Score: 1

    The iJohnny. It'll be twice the price but it'll have a voice activated flush, and a ganja scented air-freshener.

    [Insert bastardization of Ellen quote here]

  38. Not the first time by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Microsoft has been perpetrating hoaxes for ages. Look at their OS, for example.

  39. In other news by Joe+the+Lesser · · Score: 1

    Microsoft announces that .NET is actually a hoax. All things coded in .NET should disentegrate within hours.

    --
    "I only speak the truth"
    Karma: null(Mostly affected by an unassigned variable)
  40. No Shi+! by snatchitup · · Score: 1

    Literally. Thought I could get away from 'puter. Nope. Have to hold it in. Evercrack won't let me leave the world.

  41. Yes of course, they had to retract... by joto · · Score: 4, Funny

    After all, iLoo was already trademarked by Apple, the new toilet from Microsoft will be called Microsoft Shit 1.0.

    1. Re:Yes of course, they had to retract... by sprouty76 · · Score: 1

      But it won't work properly until version 3. Shit for Workgroups, anybody?

      --

      No, I don't want a free iPod

    2. Re:Yes of course, they had to retract... by mdielmann · · Score: 1

      And, as usual, it won't work until version 3, but early adopters will still get on board because it's shit from MS...

      --
      Sure I'm paranoid, but am I paranoid enough?
    3. Re:Yes of course, they had to retract... by griann · · Score: 1

      Because it only runs pee 2 pee software.

    4. Re:Yes of course, they had to retract... by UltimateZer0 · · Score: 1

      followed by subsequent versions of Shit95, Shit98, Shit2000, ShitME, and ShitXP. Shit Me sounds the best, tho

      --

      --- I'm going to get a score of -1 for this post because the mods are fuckers.

  42. Disappointment by tanveer1979 · · Score: 1

    hmmm, I was thinking about my new marketing project:
    Frag While you crap
    Never mind i will work on something else

    --
    My Aurora : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o91ZsGwJYyg
    FB : https://www.facebook.com/TanveersPhotography
    1. Re:Disappointment by The+Cydonian · · Score: 1

      Oh, Microsoft already has one. Where do you want to go today? :-)

  43. What took them so long? by NOCRic · · Score: 2, Informative

    So the UK office puts out a funny-gram on 30 April and it takes the headquarters over 10 days to say it was a joke? This after the "release" was carried by everyone from /. to major news carriers? Sure, it was amusing but it was obviously being taken seriously by the press. They should have come out with the laugh and the "oh, hey - they were just kidding" memo a lot sooner.

    1. Re:What took them so long? by will_die · · Score: 1

      Considering it has caused a few jokes to appear about microsoft on Jay Leno and david letterman you figured the corporate PR firm would of aleast flagged thoses.

  44. The Ultimate Test... by ayjay29 · · Score: 2, Informative

    "MSN is really working on building a prototype for the Summer festivals, perhaps Glastonbury ..."

    The Glasonbury Festival could be the ultimate test for a wired toilet. Problem is most of the users would be too stoned to notice, and who in their right mind is going to spend any longer than needed in a Glasto portaloo to check their hotmail, (that is if it doesn't get nicked by the skallies).

    This is how the Festival Organisers describe them...
    "The 'long drop' toilets are open stalls positioned above a large pit - looking down is not advised! The stall gates often don't lock, so it's advised to look under the gate for feet before entering a stall. But don't be surprised if you then do find someone inside - squatting with feet on the seat is a popular way of avoiding skin contact."

    --
    Offtopic, Inflammatory, Inappropriate, Illegal, or Offensive comments might be moderated up.
  45. Home use, maybe, common use, nope. by LittleGuy · · Score: 1

    (Believe it or not, I was pondering it on the loo/john just now, before heading back to my station. And yes, I washed my hands.)

    I'd tend to view common-use keyboards in toilets the same as gas station restrooms. Do your business, but don't let any part of your body touch anything if you can help it.

    But if your at home with a wi-fi and a portable laptop (with, say, a hamper to rest the laptop), then I consider it the 21st-Century equivalent of taking the newspaper in the morning.

    Just, um, disinfect the keyboard after you're done.

    --
    Mod Karma -1: I sed bad wurds. If I cep my mouf shut, I wud be at riyses.
    1. Re:Home use, maybe, common use, nope. by glesga_kiss · · Score: 1
      Why, am I shitting on the keyboard?

      No, but apparently it takes at least 7 sheets of ply loo roll before the crap stops seeping through onto your fingers as you wipe.

      Which is why you should always wash afterwards, even if you are not in the habit of visibly shitting on your hands.

    2. Re:Home use, maybe, common use, nope. by EvilTwinSkippy · · Score: 1
      consider it the 21st-Century equivalent of taking the newspaper in the morning.

      I don't feel so wierd for doing that anymore. Though I live in an apartment, and in the bathroom I cross over into my neighbor's wifi signal, and the jerk doesn't have DHCP running. I also run into the problem of the size of the laptop. A toilet in a 1 bedroom flat like I have buts right into the shower. I really don't have anywhere to put the laptop down when I'm finished that isn't a bathtub, sink, floor or catbox.

      You end up with that awkward "where can I put this" when it finally comes time to tidy up.

      Hmm, maybe a clip to hold the laptop on the wall? Or maybe just buy a laptop that is so cheap I don't care if it's accidentally dropped, soaked, or soiled.

      --
      "Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
      --Dr.W.Edwards Deming
  46. Re:Damn, by ftvcs · · Score: 2, Funny

    I was hoping to see Steve Ballmer jumping around some stage yelling 'Plumbers! Plumbers! Plumbers! Plumbers!'

    for those who don't have a clue, here is the video of the original.

  47. Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Brian_Ellenberger · · Score: 4, Insightful

    Here is the Google Cache for the iLoo.

    How can your own company hoax itself?!?! This wasn't just some Onion article or fake email everyone sent out. It was a bloody press release! And it was NOT an April Fools Trick as it dates May 2nd.

    Gee everybody was fooled into believing the iLoo was real because Microsoft issues a press release saying it was building the darn thing. Really pulled one over on us...

    MAYBE the truth is that Microsoft recieved so much bad press over it that they decided to pull the iLoo and pretend it was a joke. If that is the case, aren't there regulations against such things?

    Brian
    1. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Jarlsberg · · Score: 1
      MAYBE the truth is that Microsoft recieved so much bad press over it that they decided to pull the iLoo and pretend it was a joke. If that is the case, aren't there regulations against such things?
      I agree with your reasoning, but regulations? A press release does by no means constitute a contract.
    2. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by truthsearch · · Score: 3, Informative

      If that is the case, aren't there regulations against such things?

      In the US there are regulations against false advertising, but AFAIK press releases don't count. Press releases are released to the press (for those who couldn't figure that out) and not published by purchasing ad space. So it's my understanding a company can announce whatever they want and the press can report it. What they can't do is buy a billboard and post a picture of the iLoo on it saying "Contact your local plumber!"

    3. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Rich0 · · Score: 1

      You could argue that the release would have a material impact on their stock price and allege securities fraud. I don't think you'd get far though - how many folks out there ran out to buy MS stock because they decided to corner the porta-potty PC market?

    4. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Jugalator · · Score: 1

      I agree that they fooled parts of their own company.. lol

      I saw this in the CNN article:

      "Malina Bragg, who helps with MSN's account for Waggener Edstrom, also said last week that the project was real. "

      --
      Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
    5. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Kadagan+AU · · Score: 1

      MSN is also in talks with toilet paper manufacturers to produce special web paper for those in need of URL inspiration.

      Someone could contact the major toilet paper manufacturers and see if they were informed it was a hoax ;)

      ~Jon

      --
      This space for rent, inquire within.
    6. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Dossy · · Score: 3, Funny

      And it was NOT an April Fools Trick as it dates May 2nd.

      Uh, it would be very un-Microsoft-like for them to release something on time. It was probably intended for April 1st but release got delayed by 32 days.

      -- Dossy

    7. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by zvar · · Score: 1

      Please, plaes, please tell me you're not gullable enough to actually belive this was true. Heck, even the name of it was obviously a joke saying Apple's iApps suite is crap.

    8. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Malcontent · · Score: 1

      It's not a hoax but the journalists got suckered. They are stupid enough to get suckered again when MS announces some future product.

      --

      War is necrophilia.

    9. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by pyrrho · · Score: 1

      Message: don't believe Microsoft at any time of year.

      Yes I'm bitter. I was looking forward to the home version.

      --

      -pyrrho

    10. Re:Absolutely not a hoax, just a major screwup! by Jarlsberg · · Score: 1

      Ok, point taken. :)

  48. Ms does Vaporware? by linuxislandsucks · · Score: 2, Funny

    Since one of the DOC lawsuits that MS settle on had a clause about vapor ware does DOC now have the right to claim MS violated the settlement agreement?

    --
    Don't Tread on OpenSource
  49. Also on Saturday Night Live by Flamesplash · · Score: 1

    It's sad such a fine institution of news delivery was compromised as such

    --
    "Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door." - Emily Dickinson
  50. Hoax? by mbbac · · Score: 1

    Is it only a hoax because it wasn't received as well as they had anticipated? Isn't this something that Microsoft does? Shit something out and see if it floats?

    --

    mbbac

  51. Too bad by Seb+C. · · Score: 1

    I would have loved to hit CTRL-Alt-Suppr to flush down the toilets...

  52. Not in my lifetime... by pongo000 · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...would I have ever thought I would see /. ranked right up there with the big boys:

    In addition to receiving press here on Slashdot, the fake release was also covered by The Wall Street Journal, The Associated Press, and Reuters.

    What prestige! I bet my boss wouldn't even notice if I swapped out his beloved Journal with a copy of today's /. headlines. Hell, he might even stop bitching at me about wasting time reading all that geek drivel, now that he realizes he's been in good company all along.

    1. Re:Not in my lifetime... by farnsworth · · Score: 1
      It would be interesting to create a user stylesheet that made slashdot look exactly like the wsj (or the ny times, depending on your boss).

      the tricky part would be implementing a javascript spell checker to complete the masquerade.

      --

      There aint no pancake so thin it doesn't have two sides.

  53. imagine by POds · · Score: 1

    a beowulf custer...

    --


    Giving IE users a taste of their own medicine since 2005 - http://pods.-is-a-geek.net/
    1. Re:imagine by flamingnight · · Score: 1

      i'd rather not. that would smell _really_ bad.

  54. well.... by crimsontiger6 · · Score: 1

    duh! as if it was real. imagine iLoos at woodstock 2k (whatever) they would have been the first thing the wanna be hippies torched.

    --

    be vigilant, be pure, behave
  55. Someone has to say it by fgb · · Score: 1

    A Hoax! NO SHIT!

  56. This was not a hoax! by Black+Perl · · Score: 5, Informative

    This time, SFgate is wrong. It's not a hoax. Read the article. It's a legitimate experiment to build a prototype for the Glastonbury festival. It's just that it got so much attention that an embarrassed Microsoft had to say that it wasn't officially sanctioned communication. This does not mean it's a hoax. The SFgate chose a poor headline, especially after the reporter verified that the project was true.

    --
    bp
    1. Re:This was not a hoax! by JasonFleischer · · Score: 1
      First the NY Times, now the SF Chronicle. If this trend continues, there won't be any trusted left-wing newspapers left in the US.

      Oh well, good news for the international circulation department at The Guardian,, I suppose.

    2. Re:This was not a hoax! by Fishstick · · Score: 2, Funny

      Gawd, that's gotta be a PHE (pointy-haired editor/boss) move.

      editor: didja get the story on the iLoo?
      reporter: yeah, Redmond says it wasn't sanctioned (they sounded pretty embarassed), but the UK office says it is real.
      editor: ok, so it is a fake, right?
      reporter: well, not really, no.
      editor: so what's the by-line then?
      reporter: I dunno - iLoo not a Hoax?
      editor: but, you just said Microsoft said it was fake?
      reporter: *sigh* no, I said that the MS UK office confirmed that they really are building a prototype, but that the MS US people say they didn't know about it.
      editor: ok, just write the story and have it to me by 4:00

      (next day)
      reporter: WTF? *not again*

      --

      There is much cruelty in the universe, John.
      Yeah, we seem to have the tour map.

  57. whats this now... by boogy+nightmare · · Score: 1

    a micro$oft project thats a joke..

    where the novelty in that

    S

    --
    Kingdom of Loathing (www.kingdomofloathing.com) Addicted is me
  58. Frightnening thing is ... by kalidasa · · Score: 1

    If this had been on Mac Rumors, about Apple, most of the postings would have been in favor.

  59. $700 Toilet Seat by opusbuddy · · Score: 1

    Add a whole new dimension to the $700 toilet seat, doesn't it?



    Bet it's already got a milspec number and everything...

    --
    If this were easy, they wouldn't need us to do it!
  60. Non-touch Screen? by Heisenbug · · Score: 1

    So, right, obviously no one's sitting down to relax in a PortaPotty ... but there's a kind of interesting engineering problem here. How would you create a computer interface that didn't require physical contact -- since you obviously don't want your hands on the same keyboard as the last guy? Just to make it slightly more relavant, this could have application in hightech countries that have been hit by SARS, for example ...

    I'm thinking it would have to be like a touch-screen, but with some type of sensor that knows how far away your finger is from the screen. 1-2 inches away moves the mouse, 1 inches is a click. It would be mostly for navigating, since typing would be a pain, so you would have to have a portal-type system that would give access to most of the information anyone would want. Of course you could also put a touchscreen-type keyboard underneath -- it would just be a pain to gesture at those buttons one by one.

    So now I kind of want one of these. Does anyone know what sort of sensor could do this?

  61. ILoo and its meaning... by xynopsis · · Score: 1

    Ironically, in my native tounge which is Cebuano, one of the major dialects spoken here in the Philippines, "ILoo" actually means asswipe! It is pronounced "e-loo". Imagine the reaction of Filipinos if the product actually made it to the market. On the other hand, the product could turn into an instant hit here. People here associate "ILoo" with a old newspapers and banana leaves, I wonder what would be in their minds if going to the toilet means Windows and Internet Explorer!

  62. Oh no by The-Bus · · Score: 1

    Now without the iLoo where will I deposit my iPoo? I guess that's what I get for eating at iDonald's.

    --

    Small potatoes make the steak look bigger.

  63. Do we all believe it actually is a hoax ? by tmark · · Score: 4, Insightful

    It *could* be just P.R. damage control designed to counter how silly MS was looking. The CNN article I read indicated that the legitimacy of the toilet was attested to by several other MS staffers.

    1. Re:Do we all believe it actually is a hoax ? by Fishstick · · Score: 4, Interesting

      the headline claims it was a hoax, the article says the release was "false", but then later says

      The Associated Press received confirmation of the project from both Microsoft Corp.'s Waggener Edstrom public relations firm and London-based Red Consultancy, which handles such work for the software giant in England.

      In an e-mail sent last week to The Associated Press, Red Consultancy's Ben Philipson wrote "MSN is really working on building a prototype for the Summer festivals, perhaps Glastonbury ... This is very much a 'toe in the water' experiment to gauge interest so we'll have to see how it goes, although judging from response so far it's really captured people's imagination!"

      Malina Bragg, who helps with MSN's account for Waggener Edstrom, also verified last week that the project was true.


      Where did Microsoft say that this wasn't real? All they said was that it wasn't "sanctioned commuinication" and that they "apologized for any "confusion or offense". Sounds like they just are embarassed. They might get the UK office to pull the plug on the thing, but it doesn't sound like anyone "made this up".

      Sounds like somebody just really wanted to put "hoax" in the headline, regardless of the facts.

      --

      There is much cruelty in the universe, John.
      Yeah, we seem to have the tour map.

    2. Re:Do we all believe it actually is a hoax ? by rabbitfood · · Score: 1

      I'm sure it is. Us British are all for hoaxes. Although the British Annual Hoax Shipping Date is traditionally April 1st, Microsoft equally traditionally maintains a broad margin on shipping dates.

  64. Microsoft incapable of making toliets... by dcavanaugh · · Score: 3, Funny

    Who would think of trusting Microsoft with a device as important as the toilet? What would stop every script kiddie in the area from using your bathroom? How far from your computer does the toilet have to be in order to prevent Microsoft toilet viruses from reading your Outlook address book? How reliable would such a toilet be?

    So you upgrade to the Palladium toilet, but now you can only go to the bathroom when Microsoft says it's OK.

    Microsoft Flush 2003 offers very little improvment over Flush 2000, but you have to buy it because of "Potty Assurance (tm)." The new requirement of having each bathroom visitor sign the EULA looks annoying at first until you realize that the hardcopy EULAs are useful as toilet paper.

  65. moron rumours of the kingdumb going pottIE -1 by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1
    moron rumours of privacy returning to the pottIE (Score:-1, Offtopic)

    by Anonymous Coward
    on Tuesday May 13, @07:09AM (#5943445)

    REDMOND, Wash. (AP) -- Microsoft Corp. said a company news release
    that it was developing a portable toilet with Internet access, called
    an ``iLoo,'' was a hoax perpetrated by its British division.

    The
    April 30 release, issued by the company's MSN Internet division in the
    United Kingdom, said Microsoft was developing a portable toilet with a
    wireless keyboard and an extending height-adjustable plasma screen in
    front of the seat. The iLoo was to debut at festivals this summer in
    Britain.
    Advertisement

    ``This iLoo release came out of the UK
    office and was not a Microsoft sanctioned communication and we
    apologize for any confusion or offense it may have caused,'' Microsoft
    spokeswoman Bridgitt Arnold said late Monday.

    The fake release generated coverage by The Wall Street Journal, The Associated Press and Reuters.

    The
    Associated Press received confirmation of the project from both
    Microsoft Corp.'s Waggener Edstrom public relations firm and
    London-based Red Consultancy, which handles such work for the software
    giant in England.

    In an e-mail sent last week to The Associated
    Press, Red Consultancy's Ben Philipson wrote ``MSN is really working on
    building a prototype for the Summer festivals, perhaps Glastonbury ...
    This is very much a 'toe in the water' experiment to gauge interest so
    we'll have to see how it goes, although judging from response so far
    it's really captured people's imagination!''

    Malina Bragg, who
    helps with MSN's account for Waggener Edstrom, also verified last week
    that the project was true (or false, or true, whatever fuddles says it
    is).

    ------

    ^On the Net:

    http://www.trustworthycomputing.com

    [ Reply to This
    ]

  66. iDump by asr_man · · Score: 1

    ...would be a catchier name.

  67. And here by jhines0042 · · Score: 1

    MSN ZDNet even carried the story Here.

    --
    42 - So long and thanks for all the fish.
  68. And the signal-to-noise continues to shrink... by frenchgates · · Score: 1

    abetted by the corporations who stand to lose the most from the dilution of value of internet information, no less.

    Maybe someone like google can come up with a signal-to-noise map of the internet, or rating for each particular meme, sort of like a weather map.

    --
    Syntax error: loose != lose, affect != effect, then!=than
  69. MS up to their usual tricks... by ChrisPaget · · Score: 1

    From the article:
    "The April 30 release, issued by the company's MSN Internet division in the United Kingdom"

    Looks like Microsoft are redefining the standards again - releasing April Fools jokes on the last day of April rather than the first. Why can't they just stick to the damned specs? :)

  70. lawsuit possibility by moojin · · Score: 2, Interesting

    not that i can't take a good joke, but is their some legal precedence that would enable a person or entity to sue MSN UK? couldn't the media companies that took the time to research and publish (print, tv, internet media) this story could sue for lost revenue, lost wages, lost time, lost reputation (for printing a hoax? couldn't companies with analysts covering microsoft or the embedded devices market sue for lost revenue and lost time?

    not that i would sue, but shouldn't their be some legal ramifications for this hoax? what if somebody could prove that MS stock price actually increased in the time directly after the announcement?

    just my ramblings...

    --
    Why did I lurk so long before registering for a Slashdot account? I could have had a Slashdot ID of less than 100000.
    1. Re:lawsuit possibility by Icculus · · Score: 2, Insightful

      I don't mean to sound too harsh, but why does someone always have to be sued when something unexpected or strange happens?

    2. Re:lawsuit possibility by Violet+Null · · Score: 1

      Jesus, just that thought makes me sick.

      Look. This wasn't fraud. This wasn't Microsoft boosting their stock price, harming their competitors, or trying to gain market share.

      This was a _joke_. You know, ha ha, funny? You want to sue for April Fool's stunts, too? What a dry, humorless world you live in. Frankly, I wish more companies would lighten up, and I wish that more people's immediate response wasn't, "Huh. I wonder if I could sue them."

    3. Re:lawsuit possibility by moojin · · Score: 1

      it would have been a funny hoax if the company had taken the time to release another press release informing the public and the major news media that gave it coverage that i was a hoax. their hoax press release was released on April 30. the acknowledgement of the hoax was on May 12. so for two weeks, some I.T. analyst covering the story has been paid a salary to cover a hoax. so the wall street journal printed 1 million news papers covering this article (and now will probably have to write a retraction).

      this hoax would have been funnier if MSN UK had on May 1 said, it was a hoax, but not two weeks after the initial press release.

      "The Associated Press received confirmation of the project from both Microsoft Corp.'s Waggener Edstrom public relations firm and London-based Red Consultancy, which handles such work for the software giant in England."

      A fake press release is one thing, but then you have people verifying the material.

      Legal action may be harsh, but if i were the associated press, wall street journal or cnn or any other major news outlet that covered the story, i would not give MSN UK any coverage for a while. why should i waste my resources?

      --
      Why did I lurk so long before registering for a Slashdot account? I could have had a Slashdot ID of less than 100000.
  71. "Aiming for the low %" or "was this story needed?" by curtisk · · Score: 1
    Dear Slashdot Editors,

    On behalf of the iLoo Anticipation Society, we all(5 members) would like to thank you personally for showing us the light and clarifying that the iLoo is a hoax. We can now abandon our fruitless hopes and dreams of an iLoo future and try to continue on, strengthened by Slashdot's resolve to get "the truth out there, at any cost!"

    We're heartbroken, and a touch embarassed by having the proverbial wool pulled over our eyes, but we don't want to live a lie either.

    --

    Sehr geehrter Toilettenbenutzer!

  72. Investing by truthsearch · · Score: 1

    As an employee at an investment firm I can say analysts weren't running wild with the idea that there would be a huge market niche for potty PCs and that everyone should dump their money into MSFT to get in on the Next Big Thing. Although maybe they should patent the design so no one else will make it.

    1. Re:Investing by EvilTwinSkippy · · Score: 1
      ...dump their money info MSFT...

      Why is that phrase so appropriate in this context?

      --
      "Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
      --Dr.W.Edwards Deming
  73. give new meaning to Microsoft Bob by jsahol · · Score: 1

    ...doesn't it?

  74. Just a Hoax? by nathanh · · Score: 1

    No shit?

  75. Yeah, but it made you look anyway. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Interesting
    Yeah, but it made you look anyway. It made a good distraction from huge fines, this week's MSTD (Fizzer), more enlightened users, redistibution of wealth and probably a few more goodies...

    Kinda like when DanQuayle used to get sent out to publicly spell potato/potatoe/tomato/tomatoe to take the heat off of Big Bush. Or when Monica showed off her stained dress to let the DMCA have a little breathing room.

  76. Disposable Keyboard Covers by GillBates0 · · Score: 1

    Maybe somebody'll come up with disposable keyboard covers/membranes similar to the paper toilet seat covers that most public restrooms have right now.

    --
    An Indian-American Hindu committed to non-violent thought/speech/action alarmed by the global explosion of radical Islam
  77. Binary Elimination by photomic · · Score: 1

    The real problem was converting "#1" and "#2" to "ones and zeroes."

  78. Net is bad for me by marcushnk · · Score: 1

    When I first saw the headlines for this I passed it off as a hoax immediatly.. every time I saw the headlines or someone e-mailed it to me I dismissed it as a joke.. I didn't even have to read the story..

    Is the net making me cynical?? nah :-P

    --
    "Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far
  79. iLoo a hoax? by tvon · · Score: 1

    No shit.

  80. Who pays for the damage? by Advocadus+Diaboli · · Score: 1

    Just imagine the time wasted by the discussion about this hoax. Well ok, we know that Microsoft is a source for viruses, but that they now also begun to spread out hoaxes is a bit new.

  81. A whole new meaning to... by PSL · · Score: 1

    Log-in.... LOG-out

    --

    "Times may change, but standards must remain the same." - George Carlin.
  82. Coming soon by pkunzipper · · Score: 1

    Bill Gates rethinks his strategy: Introducing the Microsoft iUrinal Just For Men, (and women willing to experiment). Think

  83. This would have been the first... by Ballresin · · Score: 1

    This would have been the first time Microsoft embraced their ability to turn out shit products like crazy.

    --
    I got nothin'.
  84. conspiracy theories... by Jucius+Maximus · · Score: 2, Insightful

    Maybe this iLoo was created with the genuine intention of building such a product. But when it started to get press, the MSFT brass realised it was a 'stinky' idea. Why would MSFT UK just release something outrageous like this as a hoax? I think they didn't want to fess up and admit that they had a terrible idea so they just said it was a hoax.

  85. Why has it been confirmed? by lpret · · Score: 1

    I don't even understand why a company would create a hoax, but on top of that, why was it confirmed by an advertising company (that's doing the job for Microsoft) and another consulting firm? Perhaps you can enlighten me some.

    --
    This is my digital signature. 10011011001
  86. ya think?! by twitter · · Score: 1
    "This iLoo release came out of the UK office and was not a Microsoft sanctioned communication and we apologize for any confusion or offense it may have caused," Microsoft spokeswoman Bridgitt Arnold said late Monday.

    Is this what they call, "the vapors"? M$ seems to have a really bad case of them. Others have said they are simply full of shit. Nothing new here, who really trusts what M$ says anymore?

    I wish the Next Generation they talk about was an equally bad joke, but it's right in line with EULAs that force updates and demand the right to inspect all your files to remove those that might infringe on copyright. The only thing more Big Brother about Microsoft's direction would be to put their goofey computers everywhere, including the public toilet so that none of your thoughts would be missed. Oh dear, they just might.

    --

    Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.

  87. well well by jesperht · · Score: 1

    Yet another one of microsofts good idea's down the drain...

  88. MS left a sinker by Tokerat · · Score: 1


    Why do you think the market has been clogged with their shit for so long?

    --
    CAn'T CompreHend SARcaSm?
  89. Toilet from Warez is the Anywhere Terminal. by twitter · · Score: 1
    Shit just wants to be free. Put it where you like hoard it and give it to your friends. Dude, I've got 500 giga liters of stuff all cracked and ready to go.

    Warez. Songs and movies you can't get easily, I understand. Windoze and windoze software? That's like storing shit. Sharing such stuff is like shitting in your neighbor's yard or pissing on the street. The effort is better spent making free software. Yes, my subject spells twat.

    --

    Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.

  90. Darn! by neildiamond · · Score: 3, Funny

    I thought Microsoft was finally being innovative!

  91. I thought the "i"Loo part was a bit odd. by WeeLad · · Score: 2
    Doesn't Apple use the lowercase i convention in its naming schemes (iMac, iPod, etc)? Initially I thought it was odd that Microsoft would create a product with a name that sounded so much like an Apple product. When I heard someone at work mention the story about the iLoo, they didn't mention MicroSoft right away, and I assumed it was Apple.

    --
    Seriously, Don't take anything I say seriously.
  92. Heh.. by cmburns69 · · Score: 1

    Basically, the original story was just a load of crap!

    An online Starcraft RPG? Only at
    In Soviet Russia, all your us are belong to base!

    --
    Online Starcraft RPG? At
    Dietary fiber is like asynchronous IO-- Non-blocking!
  93. I doubt it was a hoax by Edmund+Blackadder · · Score: 2, Informative

    As the article states, the Associated press recieved confirmations that it was true from two of Microsoft's public relations agencies.

    It is believable that maybe some engineers or lower management will plant a false story as a joke, but the public relation firms deal with top management only ... there is no way they would have confirmed that unless they had microsoft corp's ok.

    It is much more likely that after realizing the whole thing just got turned into a bad joke in the media, Microsoft decided to pretend they never had anything to do with the whole project.

  94. Linuxloo by moc.tfosorcimgllib · · Score: 1

    Crap, and I aalmost finished my LinuxLoo to compete.

  95. Re:Really? by rkuris · · Score: 1

    Wow, me too! I wonder if we can file a class-action lawsuit for the costs incurred for this trip?

    --
    Get rid of everything Micro and Soft: Buy Viagra and/or Linux
  96. I thought that the Borg... by wizardmax · · Score: 1

    ...do not have a sence of humor!

    --


    Free speech is getting expensive...
  97. Wait A Minute by Pop+Top · · Score: 1

    They didn't mention the excellent coverage in Weekend Update on SNL.

    1. Re:Wait A Minute by pandrijeczko · · Score: 1

      Would that have been run on "Open Sluice" software?

      --
      Gentoo Linux - another day, another USE flag.
  98. Let's Face It... by pandrijeczko · · Score: 1

    If you were told that one of the statements below is a hoax:

    Microsoft to release the iLoo Internet Toilet

    and

    Microsoft to release secure, stable operating system

    which would YOU fall for?

    --
    Gentoo Linux - another day, another USE flag.
  99. HOAX??? by floydman · · Score: 1

    If its a hoax, then what is THIS doing in their site...

    /*Why is there a penguin on my desktop?!*/

    --
    The lunatic is in my head
  100. iLoo by smittyoneeach · · Score: 1

    Macerated vaporware.
    Atomized scatalogical software coming to you in particle form.
    Go, Mr. Softy!

    --
    Get thee glass eyes, and, like a scurvy politician, seem to see things thou dost not.--King Lear
  101. Not a Hoax, but market testing that.... by 3seas · · Score: 1

    went so bad that damage control stepped in with denial.

    It's not the first time MS has done Market testing and decided not to do something tested.

    Between this and other things, it should be clear as to how out of touch with reality MS is.

  102. hoax? by mattsucks · · Score: 1

    I think rather the project was cancelled and a cover story concocted when the shit hit the fan.

  103. Thought we already had it. by EvlOvrLrd · · Score: 1

    Why else was the 802.11a,b,g protocol ratified as a standard so quickly?

    "Where you going with your laptop, Mike?"

    "Wife made chilli last night. I may be a while."

    --


    Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear to be bright. Until you hear them speak.
  104. All this means... by kscguru · · Score: 1
    All this means is that we won't be checking back here in a month to find out the iLoo has been hacked to run Linux and serve up web pages.

    Mmm... perhaps the XBox was too much of an embarassment there?

    --

    A witty [sig] proves nothing. --Voltaire

  105. Late as always... by Dave21212 · · Score: 2, Funny


    A Microsoft spokesperson is now claiming that it was "an April's Fools joke"

    Leave it to M$ to delivery over a month late on a simply joke... WinFS in 2005, yeah right...

    --
    "Whoever would overthrow the liberty of a nation must begin by subduing the freeness of speech."--Benjamin Franklin
  106. So... by Interrobang · · Score: 1

    If they port it to Linux, will we have to use a urinal emulator, or will they build it from the bottom up to ensure full compatibility? ;)

  107. How is it a hoax? by derfla8 · · Score: 1

    Journalists are sure a confused bunch. How is it a hoax, if it is a "real" project and they are building and expecting to build a prototype?

    Is it me, or have journalism is a dying art?

  108. Whew! by Some+Dumbass... · · Score: 1

    I'm glad this iLoo thing turned out to be a hoax. I don't even want to think about the icon SlashDot would have come up with for that one...

  109. you just cant believe them by danZenie · · Score: 1

    you just can't believe anything those people say. first they say that have an operating system, now this whole iloo bizness.

    --
    You need people like me so you can point your fuckin fingers and say, "That's the bad guy." So what that make you? Good?
  110. (+0 Sig Comment) by pyrrho · · Score: 1

    >The best Requirements Document [constitution.org] ever written.

    it's a bitch to impliment.

    --

    -pyrrho

  111. Proof Microsoft stole the iLoo by Walt+Dismal · · Score: 1

    Microsoft stole the iLoo idea from a British guy named Andrew Cubitt. When he threatened to sue, Microsoft spun the whole thing as a joke. See proof here:

    http://www.theinquirer.net/?article=9442

    and

    http://www.theinquirer.net/?article=9461

    MS lies, as usual.

  112. Damn by Herkum01 · · Score: 1

    I was wondering what would happen when a script kiddie got all the toilets to flush at the same time! Now I will never find out... :(

  113. Re:BSOD- and other ailiamentary issues by way2trivial · · Score: 1
    suddenly, I was breaking out that acronym?
    the blue sh** of death
    couldn't help myself, sorry..

    --
    every day http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
  114. You were right by GFW · · Score: 1

    See http://www.bayarea.com/mld/mercurynews/news/585269 7.htm

    "The Internet-enabled Porta-Potty that has captured the world's attention has gone from being a hoot to being a hoax to being real again, but not a product Microsoft is going to pursue."
    ...
    "But after the iLoo was widely covered earlier this month, U.S. Microsoft executives became squeamish. `We didn't think the program supported our brand in the way we want to support our brand,' Gurry said."

    1. Re:You were right by Edmund+Blackadder · · Score: 1

      Wow, thanks for pointing it out. It does give you a little glimpse into how big corporations operate doesnt it.

  115. What's next? by Black+Jack+Hyde · · Score: 1
    Soon they'll tell us Vader was Luke's father.

    Jack

  116. iLoo is real! Microsoft flip-flops again! by grouchomarxist · · Score: 2, Informative

    According to this article Microsoft is now claiming that the iLoo is not a hoax, but was a concept being developed and has since been cancelled. "We jumped the gun basically yesterday in confirming that it was a hoax, and in fact it was not," said Lisa Gurry, MSN group product manager....On Tuesday, though, Microsoft said it had relied on bad information from a Microsoft employee in the United Kingdom who said it was a hoax, Gurry said. After more talks with people in London, the company determined it was a real project, after all.

    1. Re:iLoo is real! Microsoft flip-flops again! by Walt+Dismal · · Score: 1

      In latebreaking news, Microsoft accidently discovered that Passport was just a bad dream. Its entire PR team drank bad Kool-Aid. But nobody will get fired, honest.

  117. "Oh, It's Not a Hoax" by bobbozzo · · Score: 1
    Microsoft still can't get their story straight.

    According to Wired:

    "We jumped the gun basically yesterday in confirming that it was a hoax, and in fact it was not," said Lisa Gurry, MSN group product manager.
    --
    Nothing to see here; Move along.
  118. Wrong again! by flint · · Score: 1

    2 hours ago AP posted a story saying it is not a hoax.

    http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid= 52 8&ncid=528&e=2&u=/ap/20030513/ap_on_hi_te/microsof t_hoax

  119. Re:So... by Slack3r78 · · Score: 1

    You sure that wouldn't be from the bottom down? :)

  120. Re:Microsoft Deceit, the iLoo is No Hoax by jonathanhowell · · Score: 1

    Confirmed here of all places.

  121. Look closer by spooky_d · · Score: 1

    Did anyone noticed that the iLoo hoax came the day that Gates announced something like: 'nobody will be forced to use Longhorn, but you'll use it anyway'. I think the hoax was a distraction from the silly messages of microsoft that day

  122. wow... a hoax? really? didn't see that coming... by iamhassi · · Score: 1
    Microsoft making a wired toilet was a hoax? No kidding? Can't believe that, I mean a story about a software only company making a wired toilet is fake? Anyone see this coming?

    Sometimes I think reporters will believe anything...

    --
    my karma will be here long after I'm gone
  123. NOT A HOAX by matt_oj · · Score: 1
    Apparently twas true all along.

    Register Followup

  124. Aparently not a ... load of crap by Becquerel · · Score: 1

    El Reg has the story that MS USA got it wrong ... MS UK is building an Iloo

    An analysis of the situation and a letter from MS USA

    --
    My spelling isn't bad, I'm evolving the language
  125. Re:iLoo cancelled by knoware · · Score: 1

    Actually, today's (May 14, 03 Section D4) Wall Street Journal claims the Redmond Borg really had such a project and the claim of Hoax was erroneously reported Monday. "Lisa Gurry, director of marketing for MSN, chalked it up to 'internal miscommunication.'". Perhaps the reason for the "stability and security in Windows Server 2003", is external miscommunication.

  126. Where do you want to GO today? by revlee · · Score: 1

    This adds a whole new dimension to their advertising slogan.

  127. Userfriendly... by phorm · · Score: 1

    As stated on userfriendly... the iLoo concept was created by some of the most nefarious minds in the cosmos.

    Oh ok, maybe not by "Hastur", but MS is equally evil and seems to believe in their own divinity.

    I especially like the sign on the door... "where do you want to go today" - load of crap indeed