Slashdot Mirror

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/images/segsuck2.jpg

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns

WOOOOSH (scroll down to the end of the checklist)

Oh, and the parent post of my post above IS double negation/negative.

They *ignore* human rights *violations*.
= They *ignore* ... *violations*.
= They do not violate.

Else, they would ignore human rights. Or they would violate them.

Point still stands. BiTCH.

I second that, and if you haven't seen this, I recommend reading it now:
http://thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone
Old, but funny :D

From his post (warning: Strong Language):

"There you have it: the most objective comparison of two cellphones ever made. I think I'll take the rest of the afternoon off and copy and paste text on my cellphone because I can"

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone

Please read this.

Nobody cares about your pun.

Maddox had a terminal two years ago!

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone

If you don't know what Cmd-Shift-1 and Cmd-Shift-2 are for, YOU MUST HAVE A LIFE.
If you think Firefox is a decent Mac application, YOU DON'T USE SAFARI'S GOAT-PORN FEATURES TO THEIR FULLEST.
If you're still looking for the "maximize" button, YOU'VE FOUND THAT MACS AREN'T INTUITIVE.
If the name "Clarus" means nothing to you, YOU MUST NOT KNOW THE GUY WHO FUCKS ME IN THE ASS.

Bandwagon jumpers are not welcome among real Mac whiners. Keep your filthy PC fingers to yourself.

Perhaps they should focus their energies (pun not intended)

Dear Reader,

Please direct your attention towards my pun. Admittedly I do think it's clever, but I think that you think so highly of me, that I want you to know that I would never resort to using such a commonplace literary device in my prose. Therefore, I would like to formally renounce my attempt at humor and assure you that I am above making puns as a writer, as a pupil of language, and as citizen of Earth.

Sincerest apologies, D. Baggerson

P.S. - It was totally intended.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns

And yet, what have they got. A free (as in freely usable) iPhone. But still an iPhone. Who the fuck seriously wants that piece of shit (old but funny)?

I can't stand Pratchett or his work but he doesn't need friends like these:

he's sharper than Harlan Ellison and a lot more fun to chat with

Ellison's an outright kook.

much like Chris Reeve did for spinal injuries after breaking his neck

really? Reeve was a good actor whos arrogance ruined has Hollywood career long before his spinal injury (don't argue, read his autobiography).

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns

Why you'll never hear hippies bitch about Christmas

Time to vote for the Regressive party:
Against abortion, for killing babies.

I'm against abortion, but for killing babies.

QTF!

Break the deal, spin the wheel, this is Thunderdome.

Oops, sorry, wrong movie.

Yes Civil Disobedience is still Disobedience according to Maddox.

Why does everyone always sing the praises of civil disobedience? What good did it do for Gandhi? He's dead. What the hell is civil disobedience anyway? You can add the word "civil" to any crime (and yes, protesting is a crime, or will be if I'm elected in office), and suddenly it has a positive connotation? What next, civil first degree felony with aggravated assault? What's worse is that these black-foots stink up the streets with their VW bugs and harass the officers just trying to crack some skull. Which leads me to my next point:

No more police. Police officers will be replaced with a strike force with the ability to tap into your phone conversations, spy on your Internet connection, arrest you for no reason or any reason at all, and interrogate you behind closed doors during secret hearings. It'll be awesome, and if anyone complains, they will be labeled unpatriotic. The beauty of it is that people won't protest because protesters will be victims of police brutality. The reason I say victims is because the punishment for the crime of brutalizing police would be murder. It's the criminals who need to be brutalized, not the police.

You thought Bush was bad? Wait until Maddox is President in 2012? :)

Besides it is not like she spammed them with Viagra sales pitches, it was just some stupid protest that was part of the liberal agenda her liberal professor told her to do like a good little puppet. The Internet is full of such liberal puppets and they are on Slashdot as well.

Am I? I specifically added the

;) (Apple fans, stay with me! :)

to show that it was (at least partially) meant as a joke. :)
And a pretty good one actually. :P

I like good products. It does not matter where they come from, as long as the morality of the company is at least halfway ok.
But some products... well... read this for a whole lot of fun. :D

I find it annoying that the same people who demanded that Macs are not to be called "PCs" are now doing the opposite. Why don't you put your PC where the sun doesn't shine - like this webpage.

Previous adaptations include the misguided Will Smith feature I, Robot, the lame Bicentennial Man with Robin Williams, and two B-grade adaptations of Nightfall

So why should we be looking forward to the inevitably crappy Hollywood version of Foundation? Bonus link: Maddox reviews the 'I, Robot' movie.

I know that many people out there know about maddox, but I'd love to share his classic articles on PETA with anyone who hasn't. Links:

http://maddox.xmission.com/hatemail.cgi#PETA

and http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=grill

For Every animal you don't eat...

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=macs_cant

...there is no reason to try to characterize them as "underpeople" with absolutely no resemblance to any normal person.

maddox begs to differ.

Maybe it's just me, but there's something odd about someone smiling so happily holding so many worms... I can't really put my finger on it...

Here in the UK, we call pedos 'kiddie fiddlers'. Perhaps his smile is the 'worm fiddler's' equivalent of 'pedo-smile':

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=spot_the_pedo

I'd love to see maddox write a follow up to his article on the segway in regards to this "new method of herding.

Barbed wire is working fine. It uses abundant resources, and does not require a special chemical composition to continue doing its job. (i've run into century old barbed wire in forests which have since been designated protected wilderness)

We don't need poltergeist machines to whisper things in cow's ears.

We CERTAINLY don't want to make the simple control of livestock dependent on a 100% uptime on an electronic device.

Finally, we don't need to be consuming even more electricity when we're having numerous national campaigns, even by right-wing officials, trying to solve the nation-wide energy crisis.

Oblig:http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns

Insert funny smart-ass comment here.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns

> you can do anything on the PC that you can do on the Mac.

Huh, I can modify and compile my own Windows kernel? ... no? Can I boot up my PC into a target disk mode that lets other computers access it as an external hard drive via firewire? ... no? Mount a ZFS filesystem? ...no? Write programs that use a POSIX API? ... only if I use a fairly slow, buggy middle layer?

That's a surprising laundry list of features completely irrelevant to the needs of an average desktop computer user, and not a very accurate one.

And still, there remains that one thing that PC users can do that Mac users can't: shut the fuck up.

The competition honesty isn't up to scratch yet.

Not up to scratch?? Well... I guess it depends on your POV.

But I fully agree, that "The iPhone is a piece of shit, and
so is your face."! :D

They've been debunked countless times

Sometimes hilariously.

Unfastened coins. Truthiness factor 11!

Hi there - you are Maddox's new poster boy! http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns

This is NOT a net win (pun intended)

Save me.

I come to that conclusion by process of elimination because there is no other intelligent reason for this

Yeah, because nobody else in the geek community ever posts their hate mail.

It's funny, entertaining, and it's on idle. Get over it.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns springs to mind.

Nobody cares if your puns were intended.

There is absolutely nothing parents can do about kids' noise when they are up to it.

They can beat them!

Good for you

The hope (obligatory pun)...

Nobody cares if your puns were intended.

I think the editor and submitter both need to read this.

I trust (pun intended)....

Nobody cares if your puns were intended.

My reasoning is not flawed, all I did was call you on your bullshit and tell you that it was not funny.

Nobody cares if your puns were intended. Maddox, once again, is right about you. Please read that article carefully, your intelligence and reasoning are so flawed that you might miss the whole point of what trying to explain your puns that were intended really means.

I'm glad that I am a Pirate like Maddox, instead of a liberal like you. At least we Pirates are smart enough to learn from our mistakes and the mistakes of others, and do not blame scapegoats instead for our personal failures and mistakes like most liberals do. 50 years from now, you'll be in a nursing home and all you can talk about is what a crook Bush was, and have no proof of it. Maddox and I will be in a nursing home talking about our great achievements and how we actually contributed to society and the economy and solved problems and kicked butts and took names instead of like liberals like you wasting your time blaming politicians and smoking joints instead of taking responsibility for our own lives and actually making a difference in the world. I am sure that the nurses will love to hear about how Bush and the neocons contoled you via a chip implanted in your head that made you make bad decisions and bad choices and not save enough money for retirement or at least spend your money on useful things and stop being such a narcissist and fall in love and get married and have kids. Nope, Bush prevented you from doing all of that via that neocon chip in your head so you can use it as an excuse for being a complete and total loser and throwing your entire life away just to support some conspiracy theory and win the last argument over the Internet over if it is true or not despite not having any proof or evidence to back it up.

First, "Wrong!"

Also, this.

For those breathless in anticipation, please accept this as a bit of anti-hype.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone

The iPhone is a cool toy but I can't quite justify paying what they want for the data service. From talking to people in the industry, the innovation with the iPhone isn't so much with the device itself, it's with the kind of deal Apple was able to cut. The mobile market is fragmented with too many handsets, too many crappy versions of Java that work inconsistently, and the carriers eat too much of the profits. With the iPhone, developers get 70% of the take, it's a uniform environment to develop for, and Apple has beaten up AT&T to get better terms on a few other parts as well.

So, here's looking forward to what the future holds for the iPhone. Any significant success should hopefully foster some imitation and innovation from other manufacturers.

I don't pay money for Google. If I'm paying for a game it better not have any ads in it. It would be like paying to see Blade 3 or I, Robot or the new Casino Royale or paying for a copy of NFSU2. I'm not going to pay twice.

Oblig.

First of all, the E70 has a full keyboard, not some shitty stripped down, tap-and-pray smudgy piece of shit. Nokia uses a technology that's even more advanced than the iPhone's tap screen, allowing you to actually feel the keys you press as you're pressing them! The technology is called "tactile response," and it allows you to do things like dial a phone number without staring at your screen like a shit-chucking ape. In fact, every other cellphone ever made has this technology, sometimes called "buttons."

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=puns

Maddox? You have to realize that time passes between when a technology gets invented and when it gains market acceptance. Think of the internet:

ARPANET (1969).
First TCP/IP WAN (1983).
First commercial link (1989).
WWW project released (1991).
Public interest begins to grow (1994)
The word Internet becomes commonplace (1996)
Internet usage explodes (1996-1997 and later)

So one could argue that anyone trying to promote the internet in the mid-90's would encounter you saying: "What I'm saying is, it's been done already, you guys are so 1969."

I'm not judging the validity of how popular this will become (or not), just that your comment is useless.

Might want to rethink that.