Slashdot Mirror

And where to buy the equipment

My commendations on creating havoc. This pathetic discussion forum will now have four more years to gripe!

Perhaps you would like to check out the fine wares and warez at Villain Supply to further your future evil needs? If you've got the cash, we've got the evil! [TM]

* ( Posted anonymously to avoid those pesky agents who are after my WMDs! Silly federal agents, WMDs are for Evil Overlords! Offers void where legal, further restrictions may apply. See henchmen for details. WMDs may not be shipped to Iraq at this time. By purchasing one of our fine products, you agree to give us control of the world should you ever actually take control of it. This agreement is terminated whenever you are. )

Mwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

--
But this is the best part, this is when they... START RAPPING! Bwahahaha. "It's The Ledged Of Zelda and it's really rad. Those creatures from Gondorf are pretty bad." That is just a snippet from the rhyming prodigy's in this commercial. I don't really know what Nintendo was thinking when they thought up the idea for portraying their customers as hopeless dorks, but this is by far my favorite Nintendo commercial.

One of my favorite sites, www.villainsupply.com has everything an aspiring evil genius might need, from gear for your henchpeople to lairs to doomsday devices. Absolutely hilarious.

Villain Supply

This is where I personally find all of my super evil genius supplies!

You just need to shop around a bit - Villain Supply is currently offering $450,000,000/litre ;-)

Bah!

ADAMANTIUM STEEL EYES

Sure, you want adamantium steel bones -- who doesn't? The physical near-invulnerability, the cool snik-snik of those claws -- but who can afford the complicated, dangerous and painful bone-replacement procedure?

That's why Evil On A Budget, Inc. presents the cheaper, easier, quicker alternative; Adamantium Steel Eyeballs. They're cheap, any qualified evil opthamologist can install them, and your new eyes will be completely invincible!*

Price: US$49.99 per pair

* You'll be totally, permanently blind. Of course. But it's a small price to pay for INVINCIBLE EYES!

np: Yoko Kanno - Yakitori (Ghost In The Shell Stand Alone Complex OST 1)

Will the IPO allow Google to spring for a lair (http://www.villainsupply.com/lairs.html) without a convenient and obvious self-destruct button?

Villain Supply!

http://www.villiansupply.com/heavyarms.html look for ACCUKAK SYSTEMS NON-LETHAL ANTIPERSONNEL UNIT

But why would I purchase this easily traceable item on Ebay when I have a whole arsenal available at Villains Supply?

If you got it from VillainSupply.com then i suggest you get a refund. Their obvious and accessible self-destruct mechanism has been known to initiate by itself.

Moderators of Slashdot! How DARE you mark this post offtopic? Know you not that Mr. Ashcroft was our February 2003 Customer of the Month? We at World Domination LLC do not take lightly to being moderated down. Prepare to meet our blazing hot wrath, you peons!

Lord Seismodeus
Marketing Director, World Domination LLC

We have a few things that might help with your plans for world domination. Please take a look at our latest catalog. A man your age could use a nice exoskeleton, or some mutant super powers. We have great deals on lairs of all sorts this month, and I know how you love to hide out in a nice lair.

Yours in Evil,
Dr. Freidrich E. DeSpayr, MD, Ph.D, Ev.D
Chairman and Chief Evil Officer, World Domination LLC

I have some things for sale that might help your cause. Please visit my online catalog.

Sincerly,
Dr. Freidrich E. DeSpayr, MD, Ph.D, Ev.D
Chairman and Chief Evil Officer, World Domination LLC

Real Life Comics' Tony bought one of these beauties ages ago. You can buy them here for around $2,500,000, and I can personally vouch for VillainSupply's extremely consistent customer support. (None at all, ever.)

Its software is buggy, though. Read the warning there.

anyone else thinks ellison looks a look like a certain hank scorpio?

Unless the NOC was ordered at this place, I'm not impressed.

Nemesys-co? What, are they a division of the E-Ville Group or something?

I think you have the E-Ville group confused with these guys

Problem is, it's increasingly difficult to see where these new opportunities are going to open up.

There are numerous areas where American ingenuity is creating jobs for Americans (or Mexicans) in America. This list is far from exhaustive but gives you a good start in thinking about your future profession:

• Fashion trends are straining hair stylist skills. New highly skilled and educated hair stylists and barbers will be needed to maintain Americans' cutting edge looks.
• New trends in architecture are completely reshaping the American home. Factory and building site automation cannot keep up with this innovation curve. Only skills and education can fill this widening gap which is creating highly paid jobs in construction. Further, construction subsidies in many locations, such as Phoenix for example, are fueling this wage inflating frenzy.
• An ever increasing volume of ultra-confounding legislation is pouring out of state assemblies and congress every day. A new breed of highly educated attorney will be needed to keep the country running. Even as current legal professionals fill these roles, they leave highly paying run of the mill type legal positions vacant.
• While Indians may be getting lucrative jobs to program for embedded car systems, it is still up to the American mechanic to deal with these vehicles on American roads. Skills in de-compiling, re-coding and re-compiling machine code in today's advanced automobiles has completely revamped the wage structure of this profession
• American health care costs are skyrocketing. The government and corporations are handing over these costs to consumers at an unheard of rate. This has unlocked health care spending from its typically managed state and made desperate people's money available to this growing market. Everyone knows that doctors make a lot of money but there are many health care professionals that also earn a lot. The nation's nursing shortage can only be solved by the market dynamic of rising wages. Soon, Americans may be able to earn money hand over fist simply by taking care of themselves.
• The proliferation of patents and copyrights as well as their indefinite extensions and a new corporate vigor in enforcing these over individuals has added another strain on the already beleaguered legal industry.
• Demands for faster fast food have created service positions that can only be handled by those highly skilled in food service arts and educated in nutritional science. Today's fast food chains are buckling under new demands and restructuring their low skilled service labor force as never before. Today, these restaurants are often staffed by graduates of prestigious technical colleges and this trend is only just beginning to pick up steam.
• Corporate restructuring and state government budget crises have created a new industry in job placement. Today's placement firms cannot get by with yesterday's skills. A higher level of innovation is required.
• New corporate accounting standards have created the need for professions with liberal arts backgrounds. Professional accountants that are not constrained by yesterday's rules. Many existing accountants, comptrollers and finance professionals will need to re-educated and re-skill themselves just to keep up with their changing industry. This also creates a lot of new potential for high paying positions.
• Tax cuts for the wealthy have created luxury spending as never before. These items of ultra-status need care and maintenance. But unlike the gilded age of the past, where status symbols included yachts and palacial summer escapes, today's super rich are buying up super computer clusters and advanced world domination gear. These super tech toys require highly skilled and educated minions for support creating a vast new spring of high wage employment.
• With recent progress by the federal government to open up national wildlife refuges to resource extraction, and "save our forest" legislation restarting the US timber industry, many high skilled jobs in both of these industries will come online.

Or how pr0n sites figure out that you're legal: "Are you 18 or over? Click-here"

Are you a terrorist? Go here instead!

as many good chocies...and reasonable prices...

Mod the parent "informative." Thanks for saving me the trouble of trying to find radioactive spiders. I guess that I will cancel my order from here.

But seriously, if this were an everyday occurance, then they would not make a movie out of it. Suppose that there were a movie called "Bubba Attacks" where this guy can eat an entire pizza and drink a 6-pack in under an hour! Imagine the exciement! Picture the thrills!

Why will you never see this? Because you can drive to your local trailer park and see it. I go to a movie to see something that I cannot see in real live (maybe the same reason you like p0rn). By the way, I also know that fish cannot talk, and thing that go into the sewers get pulverized and chlorinated. But I still liked Finding Nemo.

First I want to make it clear that I'm not some card carrying ESR zealot. I think ESR is a really smart guy, but sometimes he's nuts. In this case, however, I think he was spot on. Specifically, he had a really cool line:
"To a manipulator, all behaviors are manipulation. To a conspirator, all opposition is conspiracy."

I think Gandalf said something similar regarding Saruman somewhere around the Voice of Saruman chapter. No big deal, just great art and reality reflecting in each other.

Some of ESR's other comments about Mr. McBride remind me that Mr. McBride should go here and pick up some cool gadgets for the enevitable last reel where a bunch of military types bust in on him.

Feh! Home Despot employs mostly part-time henchmen and won't accept government contracts (and don't let anyone tell you otherwise). Plus, their web site is little more than a home page with links to blank pages, and worst of all, they don't have a favicon.ico! How can you take a site seriously without a favicon?

But seriously, folks... I did *not* expect villainsupply.com to be a real link! Too cool... in an evil sort of way, that is. Wonder if Amazon.com knows about their "Evil Amazon.com" link?

Van Eck phreaking applies to CRTs, not LCDs. Unless you really *want* to use a Compaq portable to draft your plans for world domination...

Try http://www.villainsupply.com/

Amateurs, get yourselves a real plan

The Good folks at Villain Supply are selling a VAGUE, PANIC-PROVOKING COMMUNICABLE DISEASE for a mere US$149,999.99.

As the age of SARS has proven, nothing scares the gullible, scientifically illiterate population like a vague, panic-provoking communicable disease. Just tack a scary acronym onto any poorly-defined set of flu-like symptoms, and watch the fun begin.

Your Vague, Panic-Provoking Communicable Disease comes with several medical journal articles identifying the disease in the most non-specific terms possible, a batch of press releases, and 25% ownership of a face mask factory.

Mod me down if you must, but I couldn't resist.

The Good folks at Villain Supply are selling a VAGUE, PANIC-PROVOKING COMMUNICABLE DISEASE for a mere US$149,999.99.

As the age of SARS has proven, nothing scares the gullible, scientifically illiterate population like a vague, panic-provoking communicable disease. Just tack a scary acronym onto any poorly-defined set of flu-like symptoms, and watch the fun begin.

Your Vague, Panic-Provoking Communicable Disease comes with several medical journal articles identifying the disease in the most non-specific terms possible, a batch of press releases, and 25% ownership of a face mask factory.

Mod me down if you must, but I couldn't resist.

BUT IT'S AN AIRCRAFT CARRIER!!!
I'm sure theres some multi-millionare who thinks it would be cool to own an aircraft carrier. Perhaps those interested should also check out www.villainsupply.com

Naturally, you'd get it from Villian Supply.

Villain Supply

As a competent evil overlord, I will NOT create fearless troops. Troops that are fearless will not be afraid to try to overthrow ME.
--
Note - any henchman that thinks that this is insightful instead of funny is reading too much into it, and should be immediately sent for a session with my new zombification system.

Work on making real volcanoes. If you succeed you may be able to market your device at VillainSupply. They're not presently hiring, but you could send your rap sheet to the parent company in case they have need of an interned scientist soon. Make sure to mention any nefarious devices, unholy hobbies, or superpowers.

...until you can mount one of these on a shark's head... that would be frickin' cool!

And then you could sell it here...

Villain Supply is the answer

hmm... actually they seem quite a bit more expensive than a billion... damn what's a guy gotta do to destroy the universe man...

The home includes a movie theater that seats 20 and has a wine cellar accessible only by fingerprint scan.

Just keep an eye on villainsupply.com for your fanatic of the month :)

And if someone gets away with banning porn... Jesus, they'd half to block half the fucking internet...

Snicker!! Kudos, I could just picture that... maybe Jack and Hilary need to go shopping!!! ;-)

What a waste of taxpayer money

Need advice about your latest megalomaniacal scheme? If only you could ask history's greatest megalomaniac, "novelist" and "philosopher" Ayn Rand. Too bad she's dead. But wait! In 1963, a secret cabal of Objectivists intent on taking over the Student Union at MIT built the first robotic Ayn Rand, and now you can own a Randroid® based on their original design. Comes with stock phrases such as "Morality ends where the gun begins," "Pity for the guilty is treason to the innocent," and "Nathaniel! Bring me another gin and tonic!"

Price: US$50,000 includes software*
*software tends to be rather buggy. For instance, your Randroid may oppose immigration, yet be an immigrant herself. She may oppose infidelity, yet cheat on her husband. She may espouse individuality, yet believe that only those who follow her are individuals. She may oppose the control of individuals by organizations, yet laud corporate power. These bugs can not be repaired.

We are all safe from evil. The shopping cart is off-line. GW has once again made the world safe from evil doers...

For me, a person with an ideology cannot be pure evil.
Such people has targets for their missions, they're trying to make the world better by doing stuff.

Pure evil is one who destroys for the fun of it, for the joy of control. Thus Hank Scropio is my pick. Also the party from 1984.

The top 4 most evil people they have listed:

1. Adolf Hitler (69.4 % think he's pure evil)
2. Osama Bin Laden (55.1 %)
3. Bill Gates (51.5)
4. John Ashcroft (45.6)

This compares with the 20th Century castles site, which also has this item that would make a good lair.

and which is a real item