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Techno Jacket
Feersum Asura writes "Clothes equipped with fully integrated computer networks have been designed and developed in a joint venture between clothing company Levi's and electronics company Philips, following three years of intensive research. For more information visit the BBC website." I wouldn't be caught dead in one of these. Update: 08/16 11:11 AM by michael :More photos!
From the article:
"Clothes equipped with fully integrated computer networks have been designed and developed..."
Just think, 8 player Quake 3 games over your favourite anorak...
^_^
Go on, I've got to say it - Imagine a Beowulf cluster of these
Maran
THREE TO BEAM UP!!!!
admit defeat, live in decline, be the victim of our own design
someone needs to print this article out in colour, laminate it and save it.
you know those articles from the 60s we read where they predict a jetsons-like world with flying cars, et cetera, which make use fall on the ground and roll around with laughter?
well, in 30 years, this is the article people will read and die of laughter.
oh...my...god.
...dave
Think different? I'd be happy if most people would just think...
You're right - I should have said 'anonymnity,' which is different from 'privacy.'
much as some glasses guarantee that the wearer won't get anyone pregnant anytime soon
Heh. A friend in grad school used to call Birkenstock sandals "birth control shoes" for that reason...
Personally, I don't know how comfortable these could be. There would be bulges everywhere. How comfortable can it be to have a remote control attached to your arm, a cell phone at your side, and an mp3 player by your shoulder?
Admittedly, it's an interesting idea, but I honestly can't see people wearing them. Maybe something with a microphone in the collar for a cell phone, but I think anything much more than that would be too bulky or heavy.
Also, I disagree with the BBC's calling this "geek chic." Just because we're geeks and like technology doesn't mean that we want to look stupid and uncomfortable. These things just won't work IMHO.
mmm...physics...
"Honey, the washer isn't starting."
"Oh, you see, that's because our son's Novell pants won't wash in the same WinCE-powered appliance with that Philips jacket of yours... Here, I'll write a little perl script... hmm... hard-code the wash and rinse cycles... almost working... have to add the laundry detergent manually... ... *humm* Hey! It works! Isn't technology liberating!"
Wah!
Yeah, wait until it rains the first time. You might just get caught dead in one of those...
kwsNI
Wah!
Some smaller companies have been making jackets in the same vein, often out of Kevlar (now all it needs is thermoptic camouflage (okay, so I was watching Ghost in the Shell last night)).
And of course you can buy vests specifically designed for the many wearable computers out there.
Cool to see more minds thinking about it, though. Maybe someone will get it right eventually.
-----
Klactovedestene!
Forget the jacket, let me know when the Techno-Trousers are available -- as long as they haven't gone wrong!
www.ridiculopathy.com
today: democrats protest their own convention, shut themselves down
and the obvious one if you're a windows user : my shirt turned blue ... again.
Of course : asking a woman with a blue shirt if you may press alt-ctrl-del might get you a slap in the face
Nobody believes the official spokesman, but everybody trusts an unidentified source. -- Ron Nesen
I just heard on the news these jackets are available in the more expensive Dutch clothing shops. That's great. Now I still can't afford them, but at least I can't afford them around the corner!
If there is hope, it lies in the trolls.
Is it just me, or could they make this stuff hidden to make it more "cool" and less intrusive. I'm a full on geek, but I don't need to show it to everyone all the time. I rather like the James Bond approach, rather than looking like a some kind of super hero from a bad comic.
--Fac Iustum Nec Time-- --Veritas Prevalibit--
Printemps sometimes sends their skaters out to do webcasts. The last one was at the Cannes Film Festival.
Cell phones embedded in tennis shoes???
Bah! That's nothing new. Agent 86 had a shoe phone in the 60's.
-Kazir dc:
Hmm. A few days ago, an inattentive boob pulled out from a side street in front of me, totaling my motorcycle and sending me to the hospital. It would have been quite nice if my gear contained impact sensors and sent a message to my wife that there had been an incident, and whether to pick me up at the hospital or morgue based on lifesigns.
Given that I'm serious about integrating a bike-mounted GPS unit, radar detector, trip computer, and a small x86 system with a solid-state disk (for music, nav, communication) with display (mounted on the sleeve or upper thigh for visibility while riding) and other i/o (speaker/mic in helmet, minimal handlebar-based button input), it doesn't seem all that farfetched to add a couple of serial inputs such as impact, IR-based heartbeat, temp, and position. If you're wearing a big honkin' darth-vader-lookin' suit anyway (search for Aerostich or Cortech suits if you're unfamiliar with these) -- why not go to town with it?
I think not...(*poof*)
Underwear with a pager (or pocket for such) in the front. (Set it to vibrate)
"Does this jacket remind anyone else of the jacket Marty McFly wore in Back to the Future 2? he puts it on, it resizes to fit him, he get's wet, it blows him dry... "
I'd like a pair of boxers that could do that.
Bill Clinton: Pimp we can believe in. - The Shirt!!!
"Experts are predicting that this latest "geek chic" will lead to even further technological advances in the future."
Is it just me, or does big business have a really terrible track record of predicting "geek chic"? Such that, when they say (however obliquely) it's going to get adopted either by geeks or by those trying to look technologically savvy, it's a good signal to go short their stock? ;)
-TBHiX-
I was expecting, what...
A ball cap with monitor, speakers and microphone stitched in
Diapers with poop alarm
Stain detecting white shirts
Socks which zap foot fungii
Techno Trousers!
Ties that detect stupidity and strangle the wearer
Underwear which atomizes an odor neutralizer upon detection of methane
I mean, please use technology for something we can all benefit from, ok?
Vote Naked 2000
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
luckman
luckman
I don't involve myself with flames, much less know how to bait one.
DOH. And the answer would be.... "Yes" :)
For someone who regularly forgets to put his washing in this could be great news! I forsee remote clothing administration! Soon I will be able to assign my clothes IP addresses and wash them remotely, then get them to hang themselves out to dry.
I can't wait!
---------------------
%46%55%43%4B !
hehe, no more lost socks in the drier :o)
I mean really, it doesn't even have the essentials... Where are the holsters for your palm pilot? I mean if it doesn't have a PDA what good is it?
Just me, but it seems like a really silly idea to have this all integrated into clothing. What about other things like upgrading your current clothing? I'd like an extra few meg to hold more MP3's. Or I think I'd like a VR implant so I can play Quake III.
Norris/Palin 2012
Fact: We deserve leaders who can kick your ass and field dress your carcass.
Now the borg of the fashion industry become real borg. When does Tommy come out with his version.
We are the fashion borg, your chromatic and dimensional distinctiveness will be added to our own. From this day forward, you will dress like us.
Even the borg dress differently, but I wonder if greys are in?
Lowmag.net
Or something.
---- I'm going to lead you kicking and screaming, giggling and laughing into the future.
Mom: "Matthew! How many times have we told you?? Don't go over to Timmy's house, he's a bad influence!"
Kid: "But, but.."
Mom: "No excuses, we have the video surveillance and the GPS data to prove it. You're grounded!"
*Mom rips off speakers and game console arm, just like the borg her son has become*
Kid: "NooOOoOoOOoOoOoo!!! I've been cut off from the collective! Make the voices come back, Mommy!"
Better change that name, Old Navy might sue you for trademark infringement. Does anyone else think they have the most annoying commercials for those Technochino pants?
I just hope to someday get a 31 minute pizza...
Intolerant people should be shot.
I just hope they didn't put the cell phone next to your brain
I suppose there's nothing stopping me from making my own, aside from my lack of skill, and the poor availability of machine washable electronics...
Oh, yeah, that's why I have pockets. Never mind
What is the robbing of a bank, compared to the founding of a bank? -- Bertolt Brecht
Your best bet would be to get that kind of (army?)west they're using in the stargate movie... I guess you would'nt need it to bee bulletproof though... :)
Caller: Yeah, some script kiddies have hacked into my clothes and are running a recursion algorithm on the zipper of my pants. I've got tracks-marks on my penis from all the zipping and un-zipping. Can you get it to stop?
911: What OS are you running?
Caller: Debian 6.1.
911: Sorry, we only support Red Hat 9.3. Thank you for calling 911. [Click]
Shocking....
I definitely am waiting for the Victoria's Secret versions of these things. Imagine the possibilities..... the imagination runs riot. A sniffer?
On the flip side, maybe by overanalysis, you could find out things that you really just didn't wanna know!
I think my brain is dribbling out down the back of my legs
This would be great to take camping with you. Run out of toilet paper, just run a couple of printer tests, and voila!
what first comes in mind... washable at 30 degrees Celsius?
If my mom was right, these things could save your life. She always said wear clean underwear in case I got in an accident. Connect these to your self-driving car, and you'd never get in an accident if your underwear was dirty!
If it rains, you might be.
The best use for this would be to "accidentally" bump into someone wearing a technojacket turning the "network" of fine wires in the fabric into one big heating element. Lets see them try and claim on the warrenty for the melted mess they would have left.
"Honest, I was just walking along when it started raining!!!"
Bob.
most annoying commercials
Um.. don't know if I've seen them, I watch so little TV. Someone had some awful tech-vest commercials a while, back, no networking or anything fun like that. Just the kinds of vests the rural kids wore (probably because their fathers hunted in similar), remember blue jeans, before being fashionable were the clothing of laborers.
I guess this would make sense along that last thought, the Levis Techno-Jackets look like Airport Groundcrew outfits, how better to impress your friends than to look like a baggage handler?
Vote Naked 2000
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
"Hey baby, wanna cluster?"
--
How cool would it be to ping your laundry?
http://crummysocks.com
Great, but what will I wear during the summer? or if I ever go to the southwest?
Doesn't putting a laptop in a ski outfit seem a little silly? I mean, yes, I ski poorly and I imagine I'd wreck it in like - a bunny slope or two, but even experienced people crash and burn (ABC's "the agony of defeat" from the 80's scared me to not ski until very recently).
The only activewear worse than ski wear that I can imagine incorporating electronics in is a wetsuit.
You say you want a revolution?
The jacket looks fine as long as the earpieces are changed. I wouldn't mind one then.
It's a great concept, but I would have to say that this is still an alpha release.
The article didn't go very far into explaining what systems the jacket actually uses. I'd like to read up on those before I go and spend a lot of cash. Good concept, needs work...
What would happen in the rain?
I second that, nothing irritates me quite like
people prancing around showing off they're new
gadgets. And what gets me is that they're
always loud about it too. I wish that they'd
invent something that you have to be quiet
for it to work!
>"spoooon!!"
hahaha.. I loved the Tick. Too bad its
not on anymore..
trousers defragged while U wait
suits pressed and reformatted, 1 hour
This Week's Special: upgrade the memory in your UnderWare and receive a pair of USB socks
Mr. Ska
All I need is some computer pants. Then my girlfriend would see me and say, "Hey darlin', is that a hard drive in your pants or are ya' happy to see me?"
Mas vale cholo, que mal acompañado.
can you say hoaxs
tach315
Keeping track of the kids is easy in this smart kidswear concept which incorporates GPS-driven locators and miniature camera's allowing parents to ensure they're safe, while a computer game console worn on the sleeve keeps the kids happy.
That's my daughter in the silver jacket :-)
There are always 'rather more accurate' articles in the Guardian. The crosswords are better too.
:wq
As the years rolled by, my sheer hatred of Michael for what he had done to my family's name came to a crescendo. And then, he himself let me know how to get my revenge, albiet inadvertently.
I broke into his house and stole to his bedroom. There, sleeping in his four poster bed, was my enemy.
I pulled the pillow from the other side of the bed, gently, so gently! And then I leaped upon him, pressing the pillow to his face.
A mightly struggle ensued. He beat at me with his mighty fists, and thrashed against certainty. But, as the outcome must be in my favor, his hands were like the fluttering of moths, and then they were still.
I opened the box I had brought with me, and pulled out the Levis(R) brand Techno Jacket I bought for this occasion. It set me back about 600, but worth every penny for this humiliation.
I dressed his corpse in the jacket, grabbed the box and left the house. I drove to a 7-11, and from there, used the pay phone to call the police. I gave them the sparse details, and then hung up the phone.
Who knew that the instrument of my revenge would be something he had clued me in on..."I wouldn't be caught dead in one of these."
that before in Back to the Future 2 ;)
... and self-drying... that would be cool ;)
now if it was one-size fits all
/* Lobster Stick To Magnet!*/
There's some areas people are mugged for their old trainers.
I think i'd worry about walking round in a jacket that everyone knows has £600 worth of electronic stuff sewn into it.
PigPog.
Off hand I don't know of an online site with a full picture of the jacket, I'll post it if I find one.
Asher Hoskins
Philips Wearables Project
(not official PR person, yadda, yadda...)
When I was at Disney World in Florida a couple of months ago, they had a jean jacket that had a computer built into it. You push buttons that are made out of some kinda conductive thread and it plays piano notes. It had a battery pack that was sewn into the inside of the coat. I can't remember who they said invented it a couple of years ago, but the guy running the exhibit said there were a lot of people working on technology built around it. And yes, it could be washed, and no, you wouldn't be electricuted if you got caught in a rainstorm any more than if your amphibious Stomper (showing my age on that one) just happened to be in a pool with you.
Damn. Blew my one-liner in the subject field. Nothing left to say.
PigPog.
1. How long till they port Linux to this? [w/mods of course, maybe using those mini web server gadgets]
2. Imagine a beowulf cluster of these [again modded w/mini computers]
You may all now return to intelligent conversation.
-={(Astynax)}=-
-={(Astynax)}=-
"Darkness beyond Twilight"
you know, it might actuallyh be cheaper if they just made clothes with more pockets...
Opinionated Law Student Strikes Again!
Great! Now all we need is to get this thing running on human sweat (or motion) instead of battery power. Once we get apache running, I'll lose 20 pounds a week!
std::disclaimer<std::legalese> sig=new std::disclaimer; sig->dump(); delete sig;
Philippa Wagner, of Philips Design, said clothing was currently being developed which could be used to monitor people's health, with the fabric itself acting as the electricity conductor
Just what I have always wanted - a fully conductive outfit to wear around during lightning storms!!
WOO HOO
Did you dump core into them?
--
"When I grow up, I want to be a weirdo"
How would you tell if someone just had a mild nervous twitch from the embarrasment of wearing the thing or was suffering a DOS attack?
Any bets once these start selling (if?) they release a line of firewall over and underwear depending on whether you want to protect your clothes from the outside world or yourself from your clothes.
"Why are you walking funny?"
"I'm trying to defrag my underwear!"
Bob.
who cares, america won't get any of this stuff for another 5 years I'm sure, and then there will be so many different companies doing this and none of them would be compatible. we need to stop letting business majors control the technology in america.
== www.FreeBSD.org == The Power To Serve. ==
Could it be that my Michael Jackson jacket with the built in boom-box is coming back in style? well all right...
-- Hail Eris
.. to hack into Natalie Portman's G-String?
Your Working Boy,
Think they'd be GPL?
If someone rips a hole in their techie clothing they could download a patch for it *uuuugh*
You may buy a shirt to find its still under development and the pockets aren't implemented yet
Are the American Government going to restrict import/export of the firmware on these? Am I going to have to change my pants to get on the plane?
A couple of things do worry me a little, where do they propose I put the batteries? and forgetting to switch the fly-mounted USB compatible live crotch-cam off whilst watching a baywatch-esque tv program
==============================
==============================
PROUD to be GEEK
Gay, totally gay.
Liberace gay.
Praise the Force Field! Praise the Laser Project! Slackware Loon #19830573
Does this jacket remind anyone else of the jacket Marty McFly wore in Back to the Future 2? he puts it on, it resizes to fit him, he get's wet, it blows him dry... when this thing has THAT functionality, I want one. :)
---
I post links to stuff here
A _real_ geek would budget up to, maybe, $4.99 for clothes.
Web Wear...the thing every geek needs.
It's 10:30am and your boss tells you that you have an 11 o'clock with a vendor but you can't show up in t-shirt in jeans.
What do you do?
With Web Wear all you need to do is log into your clothes and with a few simple changes to the underlying HTML code, voila! Instant 3 piece suit with matching tie and matching socks.
Coming soon to a retailer near you!
Grei
Three years of intensive research? All they needed was a Gore-Tex jacket, a Nokia phone, a Palm Pilot, a Diamond Rio, and a roll of gaffa tape.
PigPog.
You to can be a gargoyle. Get our happy jacket and be able to trap everything you see and do for later input into the Library of Congress.
(Must have read Snow Crash to get this one.)
Just what is going to happen on a cool dry day when I walk across a shag rug and touch a doorknob?
"..don't you eat that yellow snow."
What if someone were to crack your clothes?? Just imagine the damage that could be done assuming one added certian...peripherals.
Well, if you add a heads-up overlay visor and a lightsaber you could have duals with similarly equipped strangers as you walk down the street (SCAdians and Marklanders will go apeshit for this). Or, if they are cute, you could swap romantic preferences and see if you have compatability without having to ask those embarrassing questions (think 'antiviral firewall' and "target rich enviroment" here ["Dave...I really think you should pork that one, Dave"]).
"..don't you eat that yellow snow."
COOL how long does the battery last?
I wonder if they were in sneakers so that they could establish a common ground. I find it hard to establish a communications link(something like serial transmission) with only one conductor. Maybe it's a weak rf link that uses your body as an antenna and only being strong enough to transmit information upon contact..
Haxoring someones clothes....
Remote undressing.....
Make the MP3 player insult them all day.....
From a social standpoint, I think many people would agree with me when I say that it is very rude to talk in a cellular phone while in public. Now imagine someone who is not only talking loudly on the phone, disturbing everyone around him or her; writing email while walking about, not looking where he or she is going; listening to a personal stereo, unable to hear important noises like emergency sirens, women screaming, etc. Besides, if you're wearing a jacket like this, it's obviously the winter-time, and I don't think you need to be outside writing wireless messages. Hell, if it's cold enough, the LAST thing you wanna me doing is exposing your digits to the elements (for comfort and safety purposes) so you can type/dial/whatnot. But that's just my theory, and don't get me wrong, I think wired clothes are a good idea, but I want something more along the lines of the jacket Michael J. Fox wore in Back the the Future II.
-- From my Best Friend (Written to me over ICQ): "i was gonna go to a party...but i had to reinstall windows"
I don't know about you, but I don't want my shoes that close to my nose...
Why yes, I AM a rocket scientist!
In all seriousness, I see some possibilities with little LANs integrated with clothing.
If I'm carrying around a Discman for music and a Palm anyway, and if I want the PDA to be more of a general-purpose computer rather than a specialized address thingie (I know some people don't want this, but I do want a portable general-purpose computer), then it brings up the question: why can't the PDA use the Discman as a CD-ROM? Or rather, why not replace the Discman with a USB or firewire CD-ROM (or DVD-ROM or CD-RW or Jaz or Orb or hard disk)? Might as well have some general-purpose mass storage to share between the MP3 player and the digital camera. Forget what I said about USB and firewire, because that's not really an external storage peripheral -- it's a file server. Gimme ethernet. Think in these terms, and pretty soon you're a gargoyle tied up in a mess of cables. No problem, just wear a coat and run the cables inside the lining, and .. well, you see where this is going.
It's hard to get my mind into this mode in August when I don't really feel like wearing anything extra, and only wear clothing at all out of modesty and society's expectations and the usual excuses. But in the Winter, I love having a big coat with lots of pockets full of toys. (There was a brief period in the 80s when my coat pocket contents rivaled Dr. Who's.) (I think one of the reasons I hate Spring so much is that's when I have to give up my coat.) If each of those pockets could have a RJ45 jack or two, so much the better. Also, that would let you spread bulky components around a little better ... maybe a mass storage device under one armpit and
a battery under the other.
---
As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
Seriously, if Info-Charms comes out with some ear-rings that have some useful gadget/feature I'd even get my ears pierced.
Mind you, all I'd like at the moment is a mixer for my MP3 player and mobile phone, so when I'm walking down the street listening to my music I don't have to rely on the vibrating alert to know that my phone's ringing. Aim big, start small.
For those with the Dead Kennedy's Give me convenience or give me death, would track 2 be a 500 error?
This would go nicely with the eHolster.
They don't call us webslingers for nothing.
Kevin Fox
Kevin Fox
Add to list of unnecessary/dangerous appliances sewn into ugly jacket:
1) Connector for a pair of I-glasses, so user can wander into busy streets while playing QuakeII.
2) Lightning rod and battery recharge unit.
-- Who, me? Not a chance, pal...
"...they may harpoon us, but they ain't gonna pick us up on no radar screen!"
If you want more info and not so geeky pictures, check out Philips Research
From what I read, the jacket just replaces your cell phone and mp3 player. Who has ever said, "Boy, if only I could combine my cell phone and mp3 player. Maybe it could be part of my jacket!" If the jacket had more of a purpose, I would be more interested. But as it is, I think the only people who will wear this will be those who just want to say, "Look, I'm wearing a computer!"
I've been seeing a lot of 'I wouldn't be caught dead in that' here, and I have to say, I don't think most of us need to worry about that. I got the feeling that this wasn't really meant for the average slashdoter out there. Kinda like it was targeted at more say, the teen cluber. I mean, if it was meant for the slashdot crowd, then they forgot the PDA, TransMeta Processor, DeCSS Code on the back, etc....
But it 's a step towards something that we might like. And when that comes, I'd be willing to bet that it'll come in a wide enough range of clothing that we'll all find something we like...
Many of us already plate ourselves in the armor of pagers, cellphones, PDAs, and other gadgetry. I'm all for having places to secure these devices, but I'm not about to go wearing chips on my shoulders and our parts on our sleeves. ;-)
403: Connection refused
All opinions are my own - until criticized
cynicism_mode=on
Why would anyone want to pay 600 quid for a jacket which has wires to connect their phone and mp3 player when every man and their dog will have bluetooth devices all over them `real soon now'?
Besides, I already have a phone and a smaller mp3 player, so why would I want one of these? To look `geek chic'? Please...
Less cynically: Does anyone actually _want_ one of these jackets?
I dunno -- one of the best things about being a nerd is the knowledge that if I go out of town and leave my phone, pager, Palm, laptop, and no phone number where I'm staying, the situation at work can degenerate into tight knots of people blaming each other as to why the DB server is down, they can't get their email, and nobody is getting any Quake time in.
I sure don't want people being able to beep my skivvies to let me know that they got a Word document with a macro virus.
I think we can file this under "Lamer". Just like those hilarious white-bread suburban boys who dress in some vaguely percieved "gangsta" style, thinking it gives them an "image". Think of the guy in the next department who has a Dual PIII at home running "Linux 6.0", but mostly uses it to surf the Web. There's the target market...
(But, I have to admit, I'd REALLY like to see some of those Victoria's Secret models doing the runway with these things on...)
Potato chips are a by-yourself food.
(And yes, I do know Bulova is a trade mark.)
The clothing with lots of pockets is great. The only problem is poor pocket placement and sizing. For example, I have a pair of paints where the watch pocket is 2" wide and 4" deep, making it fscking hard to reach my watch (yes I have a pocket watch).
Beware the penguins
That was Feathers Carruthers, Tux's evil twin.
Vote Naked 2000
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Can you imagine a bunch of these on a packed train setting each other off like a minefield that's been packed too dense - each one being flung into another when they touch? That's a pay-per-view event if I've ever heard of one...
(On a serious note, real photo-chromatic glasses rock, I'm never buying normal lenses again.)
Who remembers the scene in Back to the Future II where Marty's jacket gets wet and dries itself?
We are one step closer..
Trolls, it must be cool to be that bored.
--
--
tobam'i: foo for the masses.
um... would you really want to go outside in that thing during a rain shower. You'd turn up crispier than KFC's Extra Crispy chicken. The bad thing would be that you wouldn't taste as good. Jacket of wires ask, "would you wear it outside"? not in thunderstorms
Advanced technology could rob people of their privacy.
Forget technology; what will rob you of your privacy is looking like a freak in a suit like this.
I disagree: This suit will guarantee your privacy, much as some glasses guarantee that the wearer won't get anyone pregnant anytime soon.
The Weather radio isn't part of it, but you only need a small radio and listen to the weatherforecast.
Weather rulez ok !)
I bet you could get some nice distance sliding down the hallway in that shiny snowsuit.
Then again.. if you greas... erm nevermind.
-XtAt
- about me
Duh! Vanity isn't about comfort! ;-)
I know goths that wear leather year round and RPG/MtG addicts who wear trenchcoats even during California heatwaves.
Personally, I'd like to see Palm-like electronics (mapping, browsing, email, mp3, even cell phone) built into my sporty straightjacket from Lip Service.
---
https://www.accountkiller.com/removal-requested
Do they magically turn blue when something goes wrong?
Need Free Juniper/NetScreen Support? JuniperForum
GargoyleWare - Yes straight out of Snowcrash, a joint venture with Levis and Phillips, Neal Stephenson has....oh wait, that's not it...
Why?
Our secret is gamma-irradiated cow manure
Mitsubishi ad
We apologize for the inconvenience.
blessings,
"Only in their dreams can men truly be free 'twas always thus, and always thus will be."
--Tom Schulman
I remember reading about computers and circuits being embedded into clothing being developed at the MIT Media Lab a few years ago. They had, in fact, a Levi's jeans jacket that played music when you touched the buttons (which were actually just metallic thread). They might have had embedded networking, as well.
:)
If they used this technology, which it looks like they did, don't you think the students at MIT who did the original work should be given credit for it?
Then again, looking at the monstrosity Levis/Philips came up with, the students are probably happy not to have been associated with it.
If I forget to close a table tag and someone views me with Netscape, will they only see my head?
BilldaCat
I just did....
It looks like a pile of dorks tethered together and giggling while spouting annoyingly inane star trek quotes.
For some reason their riding public transit too...
Disadvantages of the jackets include the possible implications of network crashes and the effects of rainstorms on techno-clothing while being worn.
...mmrmmm, oil can!
The tin man in The Wizard of Oz comes to mind.
(note to non - UK readers and moderators on crack - Teh Grauniad holds the Guinness record for the newspaper with most typos on one page or something like that...)
Strong data typing is for those with weak minds.
Strong data typing is for those with weak minds.
... a solution desperately in need of a problem.
"...[treat] every man after his desert, and who should 'scape whipping?"
Naaah... fur might fly, if your network goes down because of static.
(Spudley Strikes Again!)
Warning! Pictures are > 500kb each!
(Bypasses pointless `registration' on research page)
Philips Rush mp3 player
Philips Xenium 939 mobile phone
The designers of this have totally missed the point of a good Gargoyle rig. People who do full-body mobile jacking are on the cutting edge of technology, and they want to look like it. Something like the cyclopes in "City of Lost Children" would be more appropriate.
The jacket that they have shown here will make true geeks feel like pathetic freaks with no style, and non-geeks like pathetic wireheads with no lives.
Mythological Beast
Wake up - the future is arriving faster than you think.
Oop, Feathers McGraw. I wonder why I saw Carruthers somewhere...
Vote Naked 2000
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Just don't forget any of it anywhere, or you'll be screwed :)
...which might also be the reason you forgot it there in the first place?
(Spudley Strikes Again!)
Now I can dress like the kiddies in the movie Hackers!
This information is great to hear, because it leads me to believe that I will fulfill my lifelong dream of having a fully functioning BeOS in my pants.
-in a fast german car im amazed that i survived... an airbag saved my life!-
Most of the world's population lives in a climate where it's warm in the summer, and therefore it wouldn't make sense to wear a coat every day. Also, many people I know also change their clothing on a regular basis.. Should each piece of clothing have a seperate IP? Should each cell phone in each jacket have a seperate number?
Another note--Living in NYC, the capital of label whoredom, has taught me that people dress so that other people will think they are 'cool'. What would make it catch on would be if Prada or Louis Vuitton made them....
-j
-sigs of the world unite
It's The Man's way of trying to identify us geeks! If they can ID us on sight, they think we'll be less of a threat! Watch for these suits to soon become mandatory dress at all tech houses!
Note to mortician: I wouldn't be caught dead in one of these.
To tell you if you're dropping packets,and when you need to launder them.
As for 'Disadvantages of the jackets include the possible implications of network crashes and the effects of rainstorms on techno-clothing while being worn.': the network in the current jackets is passive, and therefore there's nothing to crash, and the jackets are designed to be machine washed and so a little rain (or indeed a great deal of hot soapy rain) really isn't going to bother them...
There's a rather more accurate article in the Guardian online at: http://ww w.guardianunlimited.co.uk/Archive/Article/0,4273,4 051264,00.html
Asher Hoskins
Philips Wearables Project
(a engineer, not an official spokesman! go speak to Philips PR if you want one of those!)
If used in less "obtrusive" ways. The kid's jacket seems like it might be going in the right direction...but how about a jacket for climbers, skiers, or sailors with one of those GPS locators built-in.
The jacket could monitor movement and conditions. If the wearer doesn't move in a few hours or pulls on a strap (some sort of manual activation)...it would send out a signal. It would be a great idea to find skiers burried after an avalanche, or locating sailors lost at sea.
I could also see a sort of built-in weather radio (much like NOAA in the US uses) that would inform the wearer when severe weather conditions were expected. It should be relatively simple, but it could save alot of lives...
lay off the crack.
you are completely nuts.
if you're carrying around that much crap you need to sit down and reevaluate your priorities. i recently got a cell phone, but i have it clipped onto my pocket, so,.. i don't need to worry about it.
i don't even own a discman or anything anymore.
as for GPS... i can kind of understand it for the car, but,.. if you don't know where you are when you're walking around often enough that it would be good to have it on a PIECE OF CLOTHING, then,... again.. lay off the crack. i could see how GPS could be useful when hiking and such but, really.. that's kind of cheating. use a compass.
anyway... if you don't think those clothes are preposterous you need to get reconnected with reality.
...dave
...dave
Think different? I'd be happy if most people would just think...
Take permanent home internet connections.
:-))
And then add to this OnLine shopping, virtual sex, chat rooms, and OnLine Gaming... in a couple of years time nobody is ever going to need to leave the house so why would they need a coat?
"Geek Chic" has actully already been thrown around as a term for certain forms of high-end menswear since the mid-nineties. It consisted of high-water pants, somewhat tight-fitting jumpers, brown shoes, and having the gaunt male models wear black-rimmed glasses on the runway. It only works if you buy into the whole thing and if you have the body of a stick. Otherwise it looks like you are wearing very uncomfortable clothes. Prada especially had a total love-affair with the look for men for a long time.
I hated it. It was very expensive clothing that made you look like a dork from a dsitance.
FJ!!. .are you just glad to see me?
This is just silly, a network inside your clothes. Just what I need, a bunch of IRC bound script kiddies hacking my boxers to figure out my penis size, and then emailing it to my date. But hey, an MP3 player would be ok. Then the party might not necessarily be in my pants, but certainly my pants might be an integral part of the party.
Seriously, the possibilities for electronics embedded clothing are pretty endless. Imagine:
:)
- Cell phones embedded in tennis shoes
- Jacket-Fax
- a virtual 80" screen from your ball cap
- personal certificates in your undies ( who would want to steal an old pair of underwear?)
Just don't forget any of it anywhere, or you'll be screwed
XenoWolf The Original - Since 1993
Paranoia and Unjustified Privacy Restrictions != Responsible Parenting.
And, goddamnit, no one was going to force such things on me when I was a kid. I don't want to think about this. You've ruined my day.
I have a positive modifier on Troll. When I mod someone Troll their karma should go UP!
And you thought high water pants and pocket protectors were a fashion don't. What use is a cell phone built into a jacket? Who wears their jacket ALL the time?
- No matter how subtle the wizard, a knife between the shoulder blades really cramps his style.
Does this make my neighbor's dog a packet sniffer?
Forget technology; what will rob you of your privacy is looking like a freak in a suit like this.
This stuff will soon go the way of "Generra Hypercolor" and the like.
Blar.
Disadvantages of the jackets include the possible implications of network crashes and the effects of rainstorms on techno-clothing while being worn.
This sounds scary when you consider the fabric itself acting as the electricity conductor. A quick rain storm could fry you or what?! how much power would something like this take to run?
When did just keeping your mobile phone, a portable audio device, a remote control panel, a microphone and headphones in your pockets become passe?
YouTube & Google Video -> podcast http://castcluster.blogspot.com/
For the pranksters, you could include ultrasonic speakers to cause a little avalanche to eliminate the competition (in competitions of course!).
Then of course, there are night vision goggles... just because. And to put a Dune spin on things, lets add some gas collector/converter in your pants. Just think, everytime you fart, you recharge your gas powered burner (which is in your emergency kit). So burritos for everyone, before you mount up!
Actually, back to a more serious note, I can see this kind of technology being put into those folks' polar wear... you know, those guys that like to explore the North and South 'poles'. I could personally use some of that for diving.
However, I think most of those are silly, but I wouldn't be suprised at all if it caught on with some looser group that defines success as having the latest, not necessarily the greatest!
I seek not only to follow in the footsteps of the men of old, I seek the things they sought.
In Flames! Now do I get my 20 points? :)
I used my friends Minidisc player (with noise cancelation head phones) proper placement of its controller device, a palm III and a nokia cell phone, all in my trenchcoat. I never got around to networking, but I could of, since the nokia has IrDA on it.
Any my trenchcoat was teflon coated, so everything was waterproofed if kept inside the coat. I hide the cables on the inside, the remote ran down to the inside cuff of my left sleeve, and the earbuds were hidden by my hair. I was listening to pink floyd most of my creative writing class, and people didnt know it.
Real life gargoyles, a la SnowCrash by Neal Stephenson.
-- You can't idiot-proof anything, because they're always coming out with better idiots.
Oh no Gromit, its the wrong jacket! :->
I bet you can't steal diamonds with that
Paul Leader
Before I start my post, I would like to mention how one would need a set of gargoyles sunglasses while wearing this thing...
:) )
:)
(think snow crash... gargoyles... bad joke, but I had to say it
Anyways... what the hell are people so worried about here? Sure, the thing looks kinda goofy, but hell... what doesn't these days? Would you rather be caught wearing a shirt that says "Old Navy" on it?
Aside from the fact that you would have rampaging hordes of SUV drivers surfing the web in these jackets instead of driving, this sounds like a pretty damn good thing. I'd wear one. Of course, I'm pretty messed up in the head as it is anyways, but it sure beats the living hell out of sitting through class
Vorro
---------------------------
A wise man speaks because he has something to say.
A foolish man speaks because he has to say something.
____________________________
What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
"Make me one with everything."
One step closer to Neil Stephensons world. See you in the Black Sun. As the oriional contributor I felt that I had to reply.
-- Be careful what you say. Someone might remind you about it another day.
Nope, all they will see is the underlaying "hardwear" and I sure hope you did not use the "Hot Grits(TM)" plug-in while on the subway to work.
Hey! That's a great idea!
HardWear presents:
The plug-in of the millenium:
The N(athalie) P(ortman) Plug-In
Get your Hot Grits Where Yuo Want It And Get Them Now!
{squawk} Polly want a Cookie!
Don't forget: I thought of it FIRST!
---
Free ?! Does that mean I can't get a Discount ?!
This message was
Even the samurai
have teddy bears,
and even the teddy bears
Even the samurai
have teddy bears,
and even the teddy bears
get drunk
This brings a whole new meaning to calling someone an Anorak.
(Spudley Strikes Again!)
I think they missed all the real dangers...
The primative prototypes are not likely to be very dangerous, but if we get a real net-jacket with a wireless, always on i-net connection and some useful ware on the clothes (smart card, digital signatures, quicken-on-the-go) I'd hate to be wearing one in the same neighborhood as the local script kiddie, let alone someone mischiveous with real skills....
I can't wait until I can get a fax via my underwear.
Only days after this poll the winner was actually CmdrTaco?
"You'll die up there son, just like I did!" - Abe Simpson
There is no reasonable defense against an idiot with an agenda
:wq
Old man on steetcorner:
"What's that you got there? A barn coat?"
Young tech:
"No, actually it's an EIA/TIA-568B pullover!"
Cool, with one of these things I'll be able to play Counter-Strike on my way to school. Now, instead of laughed at just for being a geek, I can also be laughed at for being a freak! Just equip this thing with a Sidewinder Gamepad (the tilt enabled ones) and you'll see kids walking down the street tilting left and right, up and down, and screaming on the way "Die, BITCH! DIE! Fire in the hole, motherfucker!" That's what we REALLY like to see, right? :)
And can you imagine examinations where kids wear their Uber-UnderWare TM to school? :) Half the time they'll be looking down their pants to find their answers on the LCD attached to the bulge spot :) Soon, they'll have to strip-search kids before they're allowed to enter the exam room :)
...I am proof that intelligent beings are not always intelligent...
All I can think of are Wallace's Techno-Trousers .... :)
I'd rather be alive in them than be caught dead, actually. :-)
Even the samurai
have teddy bears,
and even the teddy bears
Even the samurai
have teddy bears,
and even the teddy bears
get drunk
These ppl put so much money and effort into R&D yet they still design stuff that looks gaudy, uncomfortable and waaaayyy to loud. K.I.S.S. (Keep It Simple Stupid)
"Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far
---it's not just for homeless guys anymore!
it's already annoying as hell when people walk around shouting into their status symbols (cell phones) just so poeple know they have one. i don't even want to know what will happen when those people get their hands on a jacket they can talk to. but i am sure we will all know about it. and do we even want to consider all the car accidents that will result? hmmm... natural selection can be a good thing...
melissa.
With this new jacket and my new CyberAngel (or whatever it was called) implant chips you can trace me wherever I go! I'll be soooo safe and secure...thanx uncle Sam!
Bringing you a CyberPunk tomorrow... TODAY!
-ParadoX-
"God I LOVE the smell of napalm in the morning!"
It'd be great to have some undergarments equiped as such so that it could control both my bladder and bowel movements. I suppose this would represent extreme operating conditions and would make for a good stress test of the equipment.
Praying for the end of your wide-awake nightmare.
Look out for the core dump....
Yes, but whats that got to do with the price of tea in D'ni?
Bite the hand.
Why do people still refer to cell phones as status symbols? Anything available for $10 at 7-11 can hardly be considered a status symbol. Face it, people have cell phones because they're damn usefull, not because they're trying to impress anyone.
Please pay no attention to the vocal but silly majority that is only coming up with dumb one-liners in reaction.
I think these look kinda cool. Between the cell I carry on my hip and the MiniDisc player with behind-the-head headphones hiding in my inside jacket pocket, I can assure you that some people would want these. I'm sure the prices will be pretty steep for at first, but who knows what might catch on, eh?
Check my Go-related blog for beginners: DGD
Here's a link to the high-resolution pictures on Philips' web site that bypasses the "Registeren nieuwe user" registration form. (What's that?--some kind of Jar Jar babble?)
--
Have fun: Join D.N.A. (National Dyslexics Association)
Experts are predicting that this latest "geek chic" will lead to even further technological advances in the future
How many of us are going to be fooled by the coming wave of "geek chic" fashion design? Blame it on the opening-up of Internet society to the average person, or whatever, but it's coming. The world will be barraged with semi-sentient 'designers' and fashion industry marketroids, telling everyone that they want to be geeks and they can be geeks by wearing these clothes. Think about these fashion people:
- They aren't geeks.
- They don't know any geeks.
- They have no idea how a geek really thinks.
How exactly are these people going to create geek clothing? Easy: They aren't. What's most unfortunate about this trend is the potential stampede of sheep...err, people...who think themselves geeks just because they're wearing the geek chic clothes. We certainly don't need Cherry Cheerleader and Joe FootballPlayer going around saying "Behold, I am geek"! The geek subsociety has traditionally been our refuge from those people. If we let this fad catch on, it will destroy our heritage. We aren't, and will never be, mainstream; anyone saying so is a liar.All of that IMHO. Or maybe I should calm down. :P)
Washington, DC: It's like Hollywood for ugly people.
>ping penis
penis is alive!
Brings a whole new meaning to the term, "crowd control". ...
;-)
Instead of batons and rubber bullets they use PDA's to crash the systems and render the crowd in a "Blue Scream Of Dearth".
Or maybe a public protast can really mean something if a hacker goes around making all the chameleon-jackets display their cry of indignation for 3 blocks round 'ground zero'.
How about getting a crowd to Beowulf an e-mail spamming attempt on their local representative?
What about
Ah the possibilities are near infinite
---
Free ?! Does that mean I can't get a Discount ?!
This message was
Bite the hand.
"Is that a kernel in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
Related jokes include:
You get the idea.
Forget these things, I want a taser jacket. A company in california used to make bomber jackets with a built in taser. The battery sat in the breast pocket and the jacket was woven with fine wires to carry electricity. You armed it by pressing a button in one sleeve and anyone that touched you got a nasty shock. Cool for feeling safe on a subway.
I remember seeing Richard Hart wearing one of these on the Next Step on Discovery channel back before he left for C|Net or whatever he is doing now.
So far I've gotten all my Karma from telling people they are wrong... :)
With Web Wear all you need to do is log into your clothes and with a few simple changes to the underlying HTML code, voila!
That worries me. I can already imagine perverts in the park taking advantage of the Flash plugin. Worse yet, what happens if you try to start a download and get a 404 Not Found, or 500 Internal Server Error?
What about Obsessive boyfriends/girlfriends/s.o.? Imagine -"Hey honey, you said that you were going out for some milk, but your coat shows that you were over at Bill's first for 2 hours and your clothes where left in the kitchen...".
What type of data is collected, and who collects it, etc. We really need to sit down and hash this one out.III.IIVIVIXIIVIVIIIVVIIIIXVIIIXIIIIIIIIVIIIIVVIII
I think I just crashed my pants!
Since when does having a mobile phone, a portable audio device, a remote control panel, a microphone and headphones make you connected to the web at all?
From the end of the article:
> Disadvantages of the jackets include the possible implications of network crashes and the effects of rainstorms on techno-clothing while being worn.
They must be joking! I think it would have been more accurate to write:
'Disadvantages of the jackets include the fact that you look like a complete prat and that the wearer will probably suffer fatal beatings by members of the public on account of their appalling clothing.'
"Techno Clothing"? "Totally Sad" clothing more like. Better to wear normal clothing and have people suspect you are a geek [0], rather than wear this jacket and confirm the fact.
best wishes,
Mike
[0] Not nerd.
Tales from behind the Lagom Curtain
The world's first commercially available electronic clothing is about to go on sale in high streets across Europe.
You might have to smoke a few to believe this jacket can access the internet.
Th
What measures would be taken to protect the security in these network boxes. I would consider getting one if it was cheap and ran linux
http://tomgould.com/
If not, well, why not?
I have no