Slashdot Mirror

Ok, I'll take you on.

I own all 3 systems. I play on them back and forth.

I've even tried out cross-platform games released for both consoles.

You want to know why having two analog sticks works for gaming? Because it makes sense. Intuitively, if I am in an FPS, I want an axis for forward/back motion, an axis for side-to-side motion, an axis for left/right turning, and an axis for up/down look control. Four axes = two sticks, easily controlled with two thumbs and leaving the fingers free for triggers.

Meanwhile, the Wiimote's controls - when used PROPERLY - can make for a good game. The problem is even in titles that aren't technically "shovelware", the developers constantly feel they have to "show off" the Wiimote by including some mechanic where instead of simply pressing a goddamn button, you shake the wiimote, or shimmy it, or turn it upside down, or whatever the hell else they can come up with. And with all of those mechanics, YOU DO NOT KNOW PRECISELY WHEN YOUR INPUT HAS BEEN TAKEN. With a button press, I know when I pressed the damn button. When I'm shaking the Wiimote up and down like mad trying to get it to react so that Donkey Kong will roll, or Spider-Man will do a special attack, or Captain America will throw his stupid shield, or something like that?

Let's face it. If I wanted to use a controller that reacted that poorly to controls, and where the motions made no fucking sense, I could just go back to using the UForce.

There's even a diagram on how to use them here.

But, considering what is seen here, I do believe that something along the lines of wash-dry-perfume bidet is actually the correct answer.
Or should be.

Please don't bring back the U-Force! It was the only peripheral worse than the Power Glove. Why don't you stay dead you bastard input device?

I do believe I've found the root of this problem. Please urge parliament to begin taxing all new NES games to put an end to this nightmare.

http://www.i-mockery.com/romhacks/knifeboy/

No NES ROM hacks?! They've been around since the late nineties.

I really didn't want to know, but the urge to google it was stronger: http://www.i-mockery.com/shorts/three-seashells/

If you knew how to use the three seashells I don't think you'd be laughing anymore. I'm sticking to toilet paper, thanks.

See you at the party, Richter! (not work safe!)

I think I know what inspired at least parts of Resident Evil 4:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089243/
http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/gymkata/

There's a lesbian sexual encounter early in Fallout 1, though I think you had to be a female character.

Where's the power of the internets now? There has to be a page somewhere detailing gays in video games...

(hmmm... ctr-t, type in search box...)

Voila! Should have known it'd be a wikipedia entry. Take with the usual wiki grain of salt.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay,_lesbian,_bisexua l,_and_transgender_characters_in_video_and_compute r_games

Plus...

http://www.games.net/features/100321_1.shtml

And for just sex in general (though the first page might be "disturbing" to some...

http://www.i-mockery.com/minimocks/sexual-games/10 .php

I guess Mad Tiger Balls is a game dynamic that didn't take off.

I've heard from my sources on the inside that a Ninja Golf remake is a launch title. Blows that Tennis game right out of the water...

They play a mean round of golf!

Fight the neo-cornflake empire!

*nerd sees article* "Noooooooooooo!"

Nintendo had taken over Saturday morning cartoons, cereal boxes, and the surface of commercial merchandise the world over.

If anybody is interested, there are numerous examples of this at Nintendo: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Personally, I think that the Super Mario Bros. ceiling fan best shows the complete grasp Nintendo had on many people's lives.

Nintendo had taken over Saturday morning cartoons, cereal boxes, and the surface of commercial merchandise the world over.

If anybody is interested, there are numerous examples of this at Nintendo: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Personally, I think that the Super Mario Bros. ceiling fan best shows the complete grasp Nintendo had on many people's lives.

Thank you for reminding me of Crossbows & Catapults. I hadn't thought of that game in *years*. I loved that thing! Geez, between that and stumbling across a M.U.S.C.L.E. link the other day, I'm not going to get anything done at work!

You might like Kill the Dog from Duck Hunt (SWF)

Clever. But not as clever as THIS!!
AAAHAHAHAHAA!!!

Funny how Sony shut this harmless thing down so quickly, but Nintendo doesn't seem to give a fuck about SUPER KKK BROTHERS being distributed all over the internet!!! Sony fucking sucks, Nintendo understands the phrase "don't feed the troll."

Never heard of super kkk bros? My point exactly.

And I too wish you could shoot the dog.

Then go shoot all the dogs you can.

ObTopic: Most NES emulators are compiled with GCC.

You can do just that here.

The infamous NES on a chip is far from pixel perfect. There are documented graphical and sound inaccuracies with regards to a real NES. Just because you use the original game ROM does not mean that the game is "pixel perfect". You also need to recreate the original system correctly (in software or hardware) or you could just burn ROMs to carts and use them on a real NES. The problem with the NES is that each cart has special memory mapper and co-processor chips. This means that making a universal flash cart (like the popular gameboy advance flash carts) is very difficult, which is why it has yet to be done.

HOWEVER, there is a guy, Kevin Horton aka Kevtris, that is currently recreating the NES (check out the pics), and not just a pixel perfect recreation, but also a sound perfect and even "cycle-perfect" recreation of the entire Nintendo Entertainment System and all of the mappers for the system!

Hence this re-created NES will be able to play any NES or Famicom game, and it will be exactly identical to the original... not just close to the original like software emulators of the NES. Compare a real NES and any software emulator of the NES. It doesn't take long to learn to be able to tell the difference, even ignoring the controllers you use to play the games.

Kevin's recreation of the NES will be just like the real thing down to the CPU-cycle and it will be able to use the original NES peripherials such as the original controllers, Zapper lightgun, paddles, spinners, power pad, power glove, and even R.O.B. the Robotic Operating Buddy! Kevin's recreation will be a must own for NES fans, as you will no longer have to worry about blowing on carts and managing a large library of carts: every game could be placed on a small flash card. You also won't have to worry about buggy, inaccurate software emulators running on a large noisy $2000 PC.

The casual NES gamer will be satisfied with the inaccurate software emulators, as they have probably never played a real NES or haven't done so in a decade. Hardcore NES fans will prefer to own Kevin's recreation... well, in addition to the real thing and a room full of real carts, but it will be allot easier to manage thousands of games stored on a postage stamp sized flash card.

so i can get my nintendo cereal while i watch captain N.

bs related entertaining link

Who else thinks of that cheesy horror flick The Gate When you see all of this amateur rocketry stuff show up on slashdot/etc.

In the movie the kid/main character fires off a Saturn V model rocket to vanquish the big bad guy. A memomorable moment and certainly one that must have gotten tons of kids into model rocketry :)

>I'd love to see the look on their faces after their windows get blown out ;)

"Woah!"

"It's so bad!"

LOL!!!!11 UR 1B00K IZ FUXOR3D L4M3R

Please, replace your keyboard and try again.

This is very bizarre.

I will deal with these people you call SCO as I dealt with the one you people have called Santa Claus

KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!

• a robot that could attend conferences in your behalf and allow you to communicate via video and audio applications - Asimo with a video camera.
• a software package that translates the sign language into readable English - A U-Force with a modified OCS.
• e-mailable identification documents - PGP signatures.
• some enhancements to Microsoft's operating systems - which usually either amounts to further cadging of features in other OSs or further restrictions on what you are allowed to do with your computer

Here is a guy who claims that cheap pink ladies' disposable razors are the best you can get. I'd love to see some empirical testing. In the meantime, I'll stick with my cheap electric shaver and learn to love stubble.

Of course, the googly eyes cost extra.

this thing is almost (not quite though, as i can see some uses for it...) as gimmicky and useless as the uforce i used to own for my nes. i got it for my birthday and it sure seemed like a good idea... however it was frustrating and unfun to use and ended up back in its box, only to be sold in a garage sale...

i suppose in this case, being an actual camera and not just some led's and the ps2 being a more flexible platform, there are some uses for it depending on how sony and 3rd parties decide to utilize it.

http://www.i-mockery.com/romhacks/superkkkbros/def ault.asp

I went to your site, and it showed that you are still a gaybo, and recently celebrated your 14th birthday.

A much better resource on gayboes. The previous link is still valuable and informative, but this one is the definitive article.

My theory is that it was hijacked by This Guy and from the looks of it He seems like a hard ass and we had Better start praying to him for forgivness!

My theory is that it was hijacked by This Guy and from the looks of it He seems like a hard ass and we had Better start praying to him for forgivness!

Suck my jumper cable!

-Us

Don't forget Super KKK Bros. 2, one of the most inherently wrong things I've seen in a while.

This isn't entirely a joke.

The review of Naked Lesbian Tennis for the NES.

Questions:

1. What is the relation between "free speech" and "copyright"? If a game is not free speech, can it still be copyrighted? According to this, "any original expression that is fixed in a tangible form" can be copyrighted.

2. Could a saved game-- which maybe would be considered a "performance" -- be considered free speech? I mean, if I play some 3d shooting game and kill only the politicians, isn't the saved game a kind of performance art?

3. What about hacked ROM games? Some of these must fall under "parody", no?

4. Surely games written by recognized literary greats, such as Douglas Adam's "Beaurocracy" is not only legitimate expression but social satire?

5. How do you draw the line between straight fiction, a choose-your-own-adventure book, and an Infocom interactive adventure?

6. If you printed out an Infocom game's text replacing the user's typed instructions with "Turn to page 7 to do xxxx" and published it as a book, would the video game suddenly become speech?

Maybe Dave Touretsky needs to set up another gallery.

W

That pretty much nails it.

Thanks for the query.

Please see the reviews here for more information, which hopefully will sway you in the direction of purchasing a most fabulous album.

Regards