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"Old Glory Insurance"
http://www.robotcombat.com/video_oldglory_lo.html

What about robots?
Oh! They're EVERYWHERE!
I don't even understand why the scientists MAKE them.

Well according to this, robots eat old people's medicine.

is it possible to make a robot that eats old peoples' medicine for fuel?

It won't be long before we all need this.

"And when they grab you with those metal claws, you can't break free.. because they're made of metal, and robots are strong."

Here ya go:
more specific link to parts

I think that giving robots to old people is a terrible solution!

Not only do we have to worry about them pushing old people down the stairs, but they are almost guaranteed to terrorize the elderly and consume their medicine for fuel!

Wait, I thought Robots stole old people's medicine.

I wonder if you can get this in Japan? They're gonna need it.

Old Glory Robot Insurance

Anything that gets robots out to the consumer is good - I am still suprised that robots have taken such a lot time to be sellable.

The reason robots are slow to make it out into the public is because previous versions were found to eat old-people's medicine for fuel.

ROBOT INSURANCE!!!!! Because robots have steel claws and they eat old peoples medicine for food!

Did anyone else catch that? Classic SNL skit for Old Glory Robot Insurance. How very appropriate.

Sounds like it is time to get some of that robot insure Sam Waterson was selling on Sat. Night not too long ago. Here's a link.

First they eat flies, next they will eat old people's medicine and eventually just feed on senior citizens. Better get your robot insurance asap!! http://www.robotcombat.com/video_oldglory_hi.html/

And you thought they were kidding...

"Many people are lonely. For the same reason that these people keep pets, having a humanoid robot would provide companionship. This is a bit dangerous however for elderly without relatives"

Not so. They'll just need Old Glory Robot Insurance!!!

Or if they want to be able to get help when the metal ones come for them.

Old glory...for when the metal ones come for you...and they will!

Check out the ad for Old Glory Robot Insurance here.

I've been using the astroflight 110D for a few years on my battlbot batteries(3 Ah NiCD and NiMH). Its worked great for me. Recentely I've gotten into small robots and am starting to use li poly batteries, so I went ahead and replaced it with the triton chargers...its worked great so far. You can get either one from robotcombat

Are these robots going to be powered by fish flatulence, by chance?

No way! Everyone knows that robots beat up old people and use their medicine for fuel. Hope you have enough robot insurance.

Cheers,
IT

go get my robot insurance policy renewed!

http://www.robotcombat.com/video_oldglory_hi.html

Here is one of their commercials

Old Lady #1: When my ex-husband passed away, the insurance company said his policy didn't cover him.
Old Lady #2: They didn't have enough money for the funeral.
Old Lady #3: It's so hard nowadays, with all the gangs and rap music..
Old Lady #1: What about the robots?
Old Lady #4: Oh, they're everywhere!
Old Lady #1: I don't even know why the scientists make them.
Old Lady #2: Darren and I have a policy with Old Glory Insurance, in case we're attacked by robots.
Old Lady #1: An insurance policy with a robot plan? Certainly, I'm too old.
Old Lady #2: Old Glory covers anyone over the age of 50 against robot attack, regardless of current health.
[ cut to Sam Waterston, Compensated Endorser ]
Sam Waterson: I'm Sam Waterston, of the popular TV series "Law & Order". As a senior citizen, you're probably aware of the threat robots pose. Robots are everywhere, and they eat old people's medicine for fuel. Well, now there's a company that offers coverage against the unfortunate event of robot attack, with Old Glory Insurance. Old Glory will cover you with no health check-up or age consideration. [ SUPER: Limitied Benefits First Two Years ] You need to feel safe. And that's harder and harder to do nowadays, because robots may strike at any time. [ show pie chart reading "Cause of Death in Persons Over 50 Years of Age": Heart Disease, 42% - Robots, 58% ] And when they grab you with those metal claws, you can't break free.. because they're made of metal, and robots are strong. Now, for only $4 a month, you can achieve peace of mind in a world full of grime and robots, with Old Glory Insurance. So, don't cower under your afghan any longer. Make a choice. [ SUPER: "WARNING: Persons denying the existence of Robots may be Robots themselves. ] Old Glory Insurance. For when the metal ones decide to come for you - and they will.

That episode was from 1995. That was hardly "the day."

But still, a very funny sketch. (Or technichally, fake ad.) A download is here.

Great, now my robot insurance is going to raise rates.

This article reminds me of the need, now more than ever, for insurance plans that cover robot attacks such as the Old Glory Robot Insurance plan.

See the video here

As a senior citizen you're probably aware of the threat robots pose. Robots are everywhere and they eat old peoples' medicine for fuel. Well now there's a company that offers coverage against the unfortunate event of a robot attack: Old Glory Insurance. Old Glory will cover you with no health check up or age consideration. You need to stay safe and that's harder and harder to do nowadays because robots may strike at any time. And when they grab you with those metal claws you can't break free, because they're made of metal and robots are strong. Now, for only for only four dollars a month you can achieve peace of mind in a world full of crime and robots, with Old Glory Insurance. So don't cower under your afghan any longer, make a choice. Old Glory insurance, for when the metal ones come for you... and they will.

Oh great, now my Robot Insurance premiums are going to go up!

Time to buy some Robot insurance from Old Glory insurance company. :)

Old Glory Insurance

Old Glory Robot Insurance. For when the metal ones come for you.

...against robot attack!

Again, I think it looks like it is time for some robot insurance!

Looks like it is time for some robot insurance!

That's right! the new robot workforce will open up lots of new jobs in the robot insurance industry.

It's not too late to invest in some Old Glory Robot Insurance, for when the metal ones come. And they will.

You only need to fear the robots if you don't have Robot Insurance.

Watch it here(10.7mb quicktime)

Assuming there's an answer to that, I didn't really anticipate the machines capturing full-grown human beings and placing them in the Matrix. This may be more of just a mistaken assumption on my part, but I always figured that the machines wouldn't even bother trying to insert humans used to the real world into the Matrix- that they would readily reject the simulation. If someone like Neo, who had been born inside the Matrix and had no idea of what the actual state of the world was until he woke up in a vat of pink goo, could exist in the Matrix (prior to being set free) and feel that there was something wrong with reality ("splinter in your mind"), then surely at least some adult humans who had lived in the bombed out hell of the real world, who had watched as the machines took over, who writhed and screamed as the machines drilled a dozen holes into their bodies, would perhaps have a difficult time accepting the sunny new version of "reality" that confronted them. Especially since, according to the film, Matrix ver. 1.0 wasn't terribly believable anyway.

I guess I just figured that if the robots have that swank artifical womb technology, they could just extract gametes from captured humans and use those to produce embryos, which at the appropriate size are hooked up to the powerplant. Given that a few captured humans could each provide enough gametes to potentially produce thousands of offspring, it would be possible to breed numerous large crops from a relatively small pool of humans, with plenty of sperm and ova tucked away in cold storage just in case of crop failure (which of course happened, according to the film). Attempting to place adult humans in the Matrix as the first generation would not only be difficult, it would be totally unnecessary. A better use for the humans that were captured (once an appropriate amount of genetic material was gathered) would be simply to liquefy them and feed them to their progeny. Admittedly, the idea of forcing captured humans into the Matrix does have the whole humiliation and subjugation thing working for it.

...warn me when the robots are coming!

-72

Here's a link to the aforementioned SNL sketch:

Old Glory Insurance

Looks like it's time to invest in Old Glory Robot Insurance
http://www.robotcombat.com/video_oldglory_hi.html

Don't forget to buy robot insurance! "To protect us from the metal ones".

Well, of course, so long as they have Old Glory Robot Insurance . Endorsed by Sam Waterston!

I'm all in favor of having cars that drive themselves, robots that can go down to quickie mart and do the shopping for me ect... But what insurance do I private joe citizen have...?

It's all well and fine now, but when they these robots finally get their metal claws you will need to get Old Glory Robot Insurance! It's for when the metal ones decide to come for you - and they will!

Hmmm. I guess they put that preview button there for a reason. Let's try this again:

Got to watch out for those robots. At least they sell Robot Insurance.

Got to watch out for those robots. At least they sell .

Elementary chaos theory tells us that all robots will eventually turn against their masters and run amok, in an orgy of blood and the kicking and the biting with the metal teeth and the hurting and shoving.

See the full Middleweight field here.
4 wins Jon, nice work!

I used to think the way you do, that RobotWars was great, and Battlebots a pale imitation. Two things changed my mind.

First, discovering something of the history behind the two. Battlebots was originally called RobotWars, but a promotion company stole the name and sold it to the Brits.

Second was watching them head to head one night. The RC "bots" on the show called RobotWars are pathetic, wimpy little things compared to the monsters on Battlebots. They have prettier paintjobs and grillwork, combined with "weapons" that can barely scratch tinfoil. If "functional" and "actually able to cause real carnage", and "shredded steel plate flying through the air" are "simple", then give me simple any day.

That said, the Comedy Central coverage of the Battlebot events is pretty bad, and getting worse. I'm a huge Craig Charles fan, and would rather listen to him than anyone who has ever worked for "Comedy Central Sports". But dismissing Battlebots because the coverage is lame is like dismissing the Olympics because NBC is lame -- it's missing the point. I think that Comedy Central dropping the show may be the best thing that could happen to the show.

Take a look at www.robotcombat.com