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nVidia/AMD Merger Announced
zombieking noted
that AMD is merging with nVidia. The new company will be called AmVidia, and will be
using non-MS operating systems exclusively to get around the problems they've
been having with getting support from tier one OEMs.
A fitting response to the "Wintel" merger. Unnoficial sure, but we all know intel is in MS' back pocket. _shudder_ Theres as ugly image
In Soviet Russia you dant have to put up with these crappy jokes
Yeah. This one is too easy to spot. I like the ones that keep you guessing.
How many April Fools stories do we need? Besides it's past noon here!
April Fool's
That we'll see new processors and chipsets that run even hotter and hotter, constantly under litigation, and have stability issues? I can't wait.
No sig is worth reading.
enough is enough.
sig
Or what? Not a bad one.
Lars T.
To the guy who modded me down from perfect to terrible Karma - Apple haters still suck
Hey, I've got a great bridge on sale for cheap.
Come on... you've got to make them harder to spot than that.
I looked at the front page and my jaw hung open for about 10 seconds, then I realised what todays date is.
Too bad this isn't true.
How does slashdot get these sites to put up these articles?
I guess that is why all the hardware reviews come from Tom.
Slashvertisements have begun.
Get your Unix fortune now!
I have not laughed that hard the whole day. Seriously. Yawn.
It's bad enough that everytime I look at my SlashApp when my boss is at my desk it says "Your Sexual Performance", but now my number one procrastination is making me actually want to do work to escape the jokes.
It's official These April fools have gotten.
You know traditionally Aprilfools ends at noon.
I know I'm going to hell, I'm just trying to get good seats.
and Microsoft if making a bid for the Vatican! (theonion.com)
mmmm and maybe the first post??
Thank you for the humor today, but after 4 or so stories, you've made a good prank into overkill (at best).
Enough already. Thanx.
I'm not a prophet or a stone-age man,
I'm just a mortal with potential of a super man.
Looks like the typical April 1 fake news story to me.
Now if it was an Intel+Micro$oft+IBM merger, i would bite :o)
This sig is intentionally left blank
How many April Fools posts can Slashdot make in one day?
-Note to admins, that's not a challenge.
This has got to be the funniest line today....
Bill Gates is believed to have told a gathering of his highest ranking officers, "Well, boys, I am really, really rich. This is your problem. Bye."
Bill Gates is believed to have told a gathering of his highest ranking officers, "Well, boys, I am really, really rich. This is your problem. Bye."
:)
how many more april fool's will we have to endure ?
This just SMACKS of april fools day. It's too weird tho, so maybe it is real.
oh why did i log onto slash today?
every year I try to get throug the whole day
without someone pulling an april fools joke
on me
(I also try and avoid the silly "See you next
year!" between Dec 20-Jan1 each year)
sigh
I almost made it this year, planning not to
leave me room the whole day. Then I log on
and I get fooled by a slash post.
aaaaaarrrrrrrrggggggg
I have yet to make it through this blasted day
Enough is enough. This is nto funny.
Just stupid enough to misspell "about", as well get hooked by an obvious April Fools ruse...
Stop by my site where I write about ERP systems & more
The link on Tom's site is slashdotted! :)
So much for April Fool's!
Now that was a hard one... What about Hercintel?
In related news, Debian and RedHat are getting along and producing a joint product called Red Planut Linux, Linus Torvalds won the lottery and donated 80% to the EFF and FSF, and Bill Gates' second and third personal jets collided into each other in a fatal accident.
A solution to the problem with music today
...now dammit, THIS one i wouldn't mind being true...
hmmm...
The idea of linux becoming a major desktop operating system is a pretty good april fools joke.
Tarsnap: Online backups for the truly paranoid
user: nytimes
password: nytimes
OK, OK, ENOUGH!!! I mean, now it's impossible to have a discussion about anything! NO ONE is going to bother reading down stories like this. NO ONE is going to moderate, NO ONE CARES ANYMORE! geez, i goin' back to bed.
on the THG pager ilfool-01.html
http://www.tomshardware.com/column/02q2/020401/ap
so it's easy to spot
"Science will win because it works." - Stephen Hawking
This is interesting.
I thought Nvidia was in the pocket of MS? (i.e. Graphics Engine Hardware for Xbox)
Then they want to use AMD as a method of exactly WHAT? Getting around the licensing and technology exclusion contracts they already have with MS on a different OS platform?
It almost makes sense for AMD now to start manufacturing chipset designs for its CPU/Graphics hardware. In essence, making thier own motherboard products.
I don't believe AMD makes thier own motherboards like iNTEL does.
Do they?
I have never used anything but intel CPU's and chipsets in all my server designs.
(Almost all of which are SuperMicro P4DC6 variety.)
Makes a hell of a Oracle server. Vrrrrroooooom!
-hack.
Got Geometrodynamics? Awe, too hard to figure out? Too bad.
You mean that now I will have a GeForce XP 600mhz actually running at 300 but faster than all other boards running at 1000?
Fabio - Sumare/Sao Paulo/Brazil/South America/Earth/Solar System/Milky Way/Universe
http://www.morroida.com.br
Here I am 3 hours from Chicago, and there are 3 inches of snow on the ground. I can't get anything resembling the truth from my favorite technical newsite, and our old SCO system in the accounting department finally died this morning.
What a lousy day.
Nuff Said.
Wow. The parade of geek hilarity never ends. I bet taco is a big hit at parties.
Andonyx www.andonyx.com
I forgot it was april 1st (coming back from an exam) and this one actually had me for a couple of seconds. Damn. /. got me again!. Just u wait till next year /.
Liberty.
Netscape announces its merger with Yahoo..
The new company will be headquartered in Israel and is expected to change its
name to Netanyahu within the next few weeks.
ARgggghh! I can't take it anymore. These have all been lame, lame, lame!
Overheard at an Intel meeting...
AMVidia or DAMN!Vidia??
-- everyones not everybody and neither is everybody like everyone.
Stop it >:O
Boy, I realllllllly wish I had long hair right now for today's April 1st performance of Slashdot.
"Pinky, you've left the lens cap of your mind on again." - P&TB
"I can see my house from here!" - ST:
Please. Stop.
Since Malda decided to turn off anonymous posting, I suppose I'll just have to log in ;> Please don't post any more April Fool's jokes. Any. They're not funny, they're predictable, both of which are contradictory to the word joke :P It wouldn't be bad if you actually posted one, semi-believable joke there, but flooding the whole page with them..well, it's just irritating. It wears out fast.
Censoring the AC's was a nice idea too. I suppose you weren't expecting the people with accounts to complain either? ;>
...fools in a row on the front page. Who's clever enough to post something that looks like a fool, smells like a fool, but is, in fact, the truth? These ones are too easy to spot.
"If you're thinking what I'm thinking, you're right." -
Slashdot has got to be the best place to find all the April fools jokes on the net. I don't even have to browse through story after story looking for a lame one to question as real or fake. They are all presented for me here to oggle and laugh at with millions of other /.ers. And I thought onion was America's finest news source.
ASCII tastes bad dude.
Binary it is then.
Microsoft is a closed-door session in an attempt to buy the United States Government and end the Anti-Trust suit against them.
There's no Freedom like UFP-dom
That's just too funny. I especially like the parts about "truckshardware.com", and buying out AMD with "excess nForce stock in the channel".
I think Mauve has the most RAM. --PHB (Dilbert Comic)
Damnit I hate this stupid day every damn year.
I finally get some moderator points, but it's on April 1. Damn it!
obviously no deficiencies vs. no obvious deficiencies
This company seems to good to be true for the /. crowd. Maybe if the story was "AOL/Time-Warner merges with Microsoft", then a good laugh would have been heard through the web...
------
Random, useless fact: I type in startx entirely with my left hand.
But I find this hard to believe coming at the same time as the retirement of AMD's long time CEO. If we could only get some real news today, posted by someone other than Rob, I'd be thrilled.
----
Jedimom.com, It ain't no summer sausage.
StrategyTalk.com, PC Game Forums
if it's funny. look into it.
Dear Slashdot: next time you want to mess with the site, add a rich-text editor for comments.
I remember when there was a prank or two on the Net and everyone got a good laugh out of it. But every site cranking out tedious joke after tedious joke -- enough already. Of course, I'm speaking to the audience that thinks recursive acronym project names and cutesy-stupid Gnome release names are funny.
Remember the post from "Linus" to the LKML demanding that the free software community practice better personal hygiene? That's the sort of thing I want to be seeing.
Whatever happened to Shoeboy anyway?
What I'm listening to now on Pandora...
so now Am_Vida will be in business of making space heaters for homes with added bonus of browsing interent and playing games. That would be Cool The whole family gathering around the Am_vidia 2000xp instead of fireplace or regular heater.
The slew of bogus press releases on april fools day made me think of a relatively evil business strategy.
Take a big, formerly im- or amoral company whose name has become associated with killing or otherwise harming consumers and investors. (Think a Phillip Morris or an Enron)
These companies routinely change their names to try to create a new image. Well, if I was {in charge, evil}, I would announce such a name change late on March 31st. The name change would get lost in a deluge of similar, pointless, april fools joke stories.
Hm... perhaps I should get a business methods patent on this one.
This is like reading segfault. Remember them? They died because THEY WEREN'T FUNNY EITHER.
Reading Slashdot on April Fool's Day is like watching my grandmother do "airline food" jokes. Just sad.
Note to submitters: If you start your story with "In a shocking move..." just shoot yourself instead of thinking you are funny. BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT!
Does this mean we'll be able to cook eggs on our graphics cards too?
"In a move that is bound to make Webmasters of sites that have AMD in the URL feeling frustrated and left out in the cold, Nvidia bought AMD today..."
Tomshardware could have at least said AMD was buying out Nvidia, since AMD has a lot more cash than Nvidia.
You can tell the editors do not read comments, or else they would know that most of the comments are saying to stop with the April Fool's jokes. It would be pretty amusing if they post a serious story right now, since I will not believe it.
I am into the copy and paste.
Notr very nice of Tom but funny none the less
L053R
They keep posting april fools too much... We should get back at them. Next year, the day after april fools, we should all get together, make up a real-sounding fake story and send it in by the masses, fool the editors into posting it, then laugh at them.
Liberty.
NOT! that's a pretty weak april fools joke.
the funniest part about this thread is that tomshardware is getting slashdotted!
He loves annoying others
Slave to a tradition that was never that funny in the first place
Fact checking on Slashdot has been so bad recently that he thought no one would notice the difference
CowboyNeal made him do it
Robotiq.com is heavily tested on animals
Joking about nVidia might not be a good idea today...
I am going to hell and I am going to take all of you with me.
This almost got me; a few lines into the article it lost me. Check out the stock pages for the two companies - no dice.
ATIntel
In other news, Red Hat, Inc (Nasdq:RHAT) has announced this morning it will buy a controlling stake in Microsoft (Nasdq:MSFT). red Hat executives, who wished to stay anonymous, explained that as a result of the merger the activities of Microsoft will be re-focused towards its core area of competence : the design and manufacturing of computer Mice.
Click on the link to get the second part og the story, and then check the URL... aprilfool-01.html yeah... Nice one...
All of the April Fools crap is getting out of hand. I can deal with 1 or 2, but every other story is getting a little crazy don't you think?
[Got Hosting?]
Of course, if this story influences the market you might get a knock on the door from Securities and Exchange Agents. And that won't be an April Fool's day joke.
Ummm... does reading this story count as a page view? :)
Enough, enough already.
I'm sure there's gonna be some day traders somewhere ready to jump on this one.
CmdTaco, get ready for a visit from the SEC jack-booted men in black at the Compound. They're coming !
Wow, amazing lack of a sense of humor among the posters here... Will a bit of silly news and fun kill you one day out of the year? Lighten up and have a laugh guys!
Hmm, and while I'm blathering, is it just me or is everyone posting at a starting rating of 2 in this thread? Another April fools gag?
--Won't that be grand? Computers and the programs will start thinking and the people will stop. - Dr. Walter Gibbs
Then where are all the RIAA or ICANN prank posts?
thelikesofwhich.com
I fell for it for half an hour. I give everyone at /. the right to laugh at me today ...
Up to this point, the April Fools jokes were pissing me. But for anyone who's just skipping this one over, read it! The article on Tom's Hardware is actually pretty funny (not theonion.com quality, but close). A few snippets:
Apparently, AMD foreseeing its inability to come up with anything as cool as the GeForce 4 werewolf demo, caved in immediately to Nvidia's demands, and an internal company task force is now working feverishly to come up with, as one source put it to us, "Really, really cool 3D stuff."
"Intel seems to be unconcerned about the possibility of AmVidia coming up with even cooler 3D demos. An Intel spokesperson told us, "Well, we still have those blue guys, and they have their own show in Vegas. That's really cool, and the kids just love it. We're thinking of buying the Moody Blues, too. I love that Things in White Satin song they do."
"ATi reacted by noting, "This does not have any impact on the value of our Canadian stock. We are going to have a really cool 3D demo using a cyborg moose that eats werewolves for lunch. So there." "
And my personal favorite...
"Bill Gates is believed to have told a gathering of his highest ranking officers, "Well, boys, I am really, really rich. This is your problem. Bye."
If you need to interpret my post, then you don't get it.
The best part of April Fool's day on slashdot is listening to all you clowns that fell for the joke and are whining about how stupid the jokes are and enough already.
C'mon folks, April Fool's on slashdot is a tradition. So what if they made you think twice today...
hecubas
Hecubas
I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm just completely unimpressed with the April Fools stories. It was funny the first couple of years, but it's so obvious and tired at this point that they really shouldn't even bother.
If you're going to do it, at least make the story believable. Writing stories about things that couldn't possibly be true is just way too obvious.
Tired of FB/Google censorship? Visit UNCENSORED!
Nothing but stupid, lame attempts at fake news stories.
Enough already.
Y'know, today would be a perfect day for Microsoft to buy Novell, or ZDNet to buy Andover, or some such other silly shit, because it would take an entire quarter before anybody read the SEC filings and figured out it wasn't a joke.
In other news, Bruce Springsteen found dead in Natalie Portman's condo of an overdose of hot grits. Police are holding a transient who goes by the name of Cowboy Neal as a material witness, but insist he isn't a suspect.
Anyone else find it slightly pathetic and annoying that all these April 1st 'jokes' are courtesy of none other than CmdrTaco himself and no others of the /. ed crowd?
Personally, I think that speaks volumes.
Mr. Taco: We don't care, actually it's getting really annoying now after the umpteenth 'newsworthy story' being posted today. Could you maybe next time try to get us just ONCE. One good joke on april fools is just fine, if not expected/anticipated. BUT a whole day of totally un-funny crap just pisses us of.
tx.
No Comment.
username: nytimes
password: nytimes
The mainstream media picks this one up, and AMD and nVidia deny everything. Secretly they like the idea and swap stocks.
My favourite website in the whole world (apart from sexmaxx.com ofcourse) has gone to hell, all this tom-foolery is driving me insane STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
Mod me down, fine with me, it's my real karma I try to keep up.
I am not sure if it's all official now, so I guess we have to wait for the announcement which could come any time soon.
Anyway, it should have been in the in the works for some time. There still seems to be some debate about which kernel to use, but so far it seems that people will get both kernels and be able to choose for themself upon installation, atleast in the Redhat and Mandrake dists.
On the light side, one could begin to think how they will manage to merge the two mascot's, a daemon penguin would be a fun choice. Can't wait to see what happens
"Oh I can't stand April Fool's Day, boo hoo!"
Oh get over it dudes. It's all in fun. Just enjoy it! Seriously. Besides, if any real news did break today, how many of you'd say "oh it's just an April Fool's Joke."
I can't believe how many whiners we have today. Never mind that somebody's trying to mae you laugh. Oohh no. No you'd prefer hearing about technology that won't affect us for years, anything that's anti-MS, and how Linux makes some minor improvement that should really have happened years ago.
Give me a break. "I'm going to whine about April Fools." Weenie.
"Derp de derp."
the complete lack of AC's and even the ability to have the 'post as AC' button kind gives it away. Perhaps by linking to some nice physics sites with very little relevance might help hide it... I dunno, I'm not good at this stuff
I seek not only to follow in the footsteps of the men of old, I seek the things they sought.
From a microsoft rep regarding the Xbox success being attributed to Nvidia:
"A lot of us had been hoping to get out of the whole Windows thing and start making really, really cool 3D games about chicks in bikinis fighting Ninjas. Now, all we have left is a big fat anti-trust lawsuit."
AMD's having a so-so day at the NYSE. But what's this?? a 40K volume spike and a $0.15 bump at about 1:30 EST (right after this story was posted)? Followed by a drop of all those gains? Looks like this was a $12K joke.
I wonder if the similar rise and fall at 10:30 corresponds to the first appearance of this story...
Hope the SEC thinks this stuff is funny.
Here's today's kernel mailing list joke.
Now that's an april fool's joke. Makes you laugh and scares the crap out of you at the same time.
--------
Bleah! Heh heh heh... BLEAH BLEAH!!! Ha ha ha ha...
You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are.
-- Colonel Adolphus Busch
It wouldn't actually be that bad of a move for either company. nvidia would get access to fabs, so they wouln't have to outsource chip production anymore, and AMD would get a company which knows how to make good chipsets. One thing that I have always felt that has held AMD back is there lack of a good stable chipset. Intel has always(well normally, lets not talk about the 820) had good solid stable chipsets, and that was what AMD needs. If AMD were to be merge with nvidia, then AMD would finally have a chipset of there own, that is actually good.
Bill Gates Admits Pay-Off For Easy DoJ Settlement. "We funneled campaign contributions through house-of-cards Enron", admits billionaire. Truth revealed from sole box of shreded documents Enron employee took home for packing material.
Quake 3 Arena masters traced to chimpanzees in animal research lab at University of Michigan. Lab staff stunned at finding, "No wonder they were so wiped out every morning," states unnamed intern, "we thought it was all the Caffeine we were giving them in their food." Primates found way out of cages and used networked research workstations to thrash "higher life forms." Conseling to be made available to several Ann Arbor and two Holland, Michigan residents
Tom Cruise and John Travolta admit they're going to marry each other. "The Church of Scientology brought us together", says Cruise. Penelope Cruz said to be seeking solace with Jenna Elfman.
Open Source Coding Makes You Virile. Closed Source coders make up bulk of on-line Viagara and herbal remedy purchasers, according to Department of Health and Human Services study. This, of course, comes as a complete surprise to no-one.
Spam actually pays big returns. In a totally ironic twist, Ernie Veeblefetzer or Wabash, Indiana, passes Larry Ellison on Forbes richest indivitual list. Veeblefetzer claims made it all by selling penny stocks within a day of receiving unsolicited email recommending 'Buy' "I've always been contrary", says Ernie, "but now I want to do good things, like give everyone in town a T1 connection so we can used AOL without any net lag."
User Friendly comic creator, Illiad, signs contract with Universal Press Syndicate. "We'll replace Cathy with it, since the drawing is a few notches better and it's actually funny", sais UPS spokesman.
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
Believe it or not, for us in Au, April fools is looooooooong over.
Still, keep em coming, the double takes that are required are somewhat amusing.
--proXy
...out of myself to my friends and stock broker.
"Our Nvidia stock is gonna be worth a lot! And they are using open source software toO! I told you AMD is a good company!!! SEE SEE!"
shoot.
Yeah, I have a great piece of land in downtown Kabul that I'll sell.
in the last year (365 day's previous to this one) i have heard that AMD wont last, that open source is circleing the drain, and that Bill Clinton was a good president. although the comment about Bill is off topic the others are not. the whole idea that linux, BSD, and other open source will cease to be is an idea not applicable. peopel who say that type of thing dont understand that with companys like AMD its not about getting maximum returns THIS PART OF THE YEAR. the willingness of such companys and PEOPLE to work together to get around problems and make something better is what is what made open source. you cant have something without the idea to back it up. more power to them. give me a better chipset to frag other guys with and im all for it.
Careful what you say around me.. I will assume you mean it.
Man, let me tell my Wicca friends that one, they are going to either go ballistic or roll on the floor laughing
No sig for the moment.
ITS not it's. Fucking typos.
sulli
RTFJ.
Can I have some too???
Seriously. A joke from slashdot is like a needle in the eyeball. STOP.
http://about.me/paultenny
Whats next Microsoft and Intel
... then i might find it funny. I think the good April Fools jokes are those that one believes in at first, and then only catches when paying attention to the details. All i've seen today are so outrageous that even someone who isn't aware what day it is remembers after glancing at the headline. The thing about April Fools jokes is: they don't work if they're announced as such.
The newssites are swamped with bogus information, and everyone knows they are (and because most of it is so obvious most people are immediately suspicious anyway, so it's even harder to catch them unawares). As you say, a side effect of this is, that it makes no sense to post real news today, since everyone doubts the integrity of the information. If a newssite made only one joke, and made it hard to find (by making the joke sound half reasonable and doing a lot of "hard to believe" articles (the last casemod article comes to mind) at the same time, then that might be fun.
Maybe we read about the better April Fools jokes (the ones that took some time to figure out) tomorrow.
"By the way if anyone here is in advertising or marketing... kill yourself." -- Bill Hicks
AMD is not merging with nVidia damn it! I have it on good authority that Intel and AMD are going to announce their merger some time this week. Additionally, they are filing to end all contracts with Microsoft, effective immediately. They have not announced a new partner yet, and with Linus' resignation, everyone is in doubt.
That i get a 5+ on mod points.
Shite! I'm off work today and I can't find a site on the Web without some halfass joke stories... on Inside Mac Games they're giving away a rocket launcher with id. I thought about weapons licensing for about two seconds and then shook my head.
But what if something really goes down? Israel kills Arafat, and the nukes start flying? HOW WILL WE KNOW WHAT TO DO? DEAR GOD I'M FRIGHTENED!
And I can so see that bastard Wil Wheaton on that shitty Star Trek show.
good thing you didn't check-out the url... there's a little hint of "a fool for april" in this.
even though nVidia is dominating the market, i dont belive that they could purchase AMD...
I must say I'm really looking forward to get that AmVidia GeHammer ClawForce 4 and the GeSledge StrongHammer 256 complete solutions. Finaly a completly built in solution that has EVERYTHING on board. No need for those annoying 3rd party motherboards or CPU, I can enjoy everything in one product! If it breaks, trash it, and buy a new one!
Hmmm, that does sound like a console... right?
It just too darn easy. But seriously, was anyone else's mouth watering for just a second? Just one second? Come on...
I'm determined to reclaim my karma. Now, if I can only find a groundbreaking article and something witty to say....
I can't do anything right these days.
sulli
RTFJ.
I have to admit, I fell for this until I was shortly into the actual article.
Normally I would have been suspicious of anything I saw here, but being tuesday the second here, I wasnt really thinking.
Stupid round earth, with its lousy timezones. I just cant wait until 2038, when the world is set to adopt Universal metric time, at least if I get my way.
I suppose the topic should be "To good to be true"
Score:+3, Sucker
c - a blessed +5 grain of salt
In another stunning development Bit Boys released their long awaited graphic board that is faster than 5 G-force 500 Ti's combined! The only catch is that the graphic board is only compatible with New Amiga "Phantom" computer which has been in development for quite a while and will be out "when its done" or shortly after Dukem Nukem Forever comes out.
maybe I'll buy an apple now...
at least I know the video card is made by a reputable company now.
-- This space for lease, low setup fee, inquire within!
It's pretty to really tell if those news stories are true or not. I actually have to think (gasp) while reading the news. In a related story, Bill Gates shocked the world by peeling back the skin on his face and revealed that he is indeed Satan. He then procedded to eat Linus Torvalds and Steve Jobs.
"I get my jollies building computers" Steve Jobs, 1983
Not because I am particularly offended, but because, boy, do I hate Slashdot and Tom's Hardware.
Know someone who is stealing cable? Report them!
...but aren't you whining too? Different gripe, same response.
Yay! FreeBSD will run really fast on Hammer.