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Train more to recognize pedo-smile.

Here, allow the Best Page in the Universe to help you spot a pedo.

Naw, he just had the Pedo Smile. ;)

I think this one would suffice for this story.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=macs_cant

I think this about sums it up.
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=compusa_sucks

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=compusa_sucks

Look the best way to rear your children can be found right here. If you follow those instructions TO THE LETTER. You'll never have any problems with. Application of number 7 is especially useful for inspiring confidence in yourself.

I cannot believe a company like sony did something stupid, that's _never_ happened before

Make it less ugly? Yeah because thats what its all about right? Sexy? What the heck ever happened to getting of your arse and doin it yourself.. why don't you put some wittle bitty stickers on it and get to the real point which is reading. Hey I just bought Moby Dick for $2.39 and got it delivered in less than a minute.. and I don't wanna hear about the stupid iPhone any more: http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone sheesh

See? He's right.

And yet, ironically, the fanboys create friction for the company too. No doubt it's less friction than forcing the developers to submerge all functionality in a sea of blinking, talking, bandwidth-sucking crap, but it's still a negative for the company.

Well, it's quite plainly more than 'just a phone'.

... I will now smoke an entire pipe full of Nat Sherman's in a preschool class just to spite these dickfucks. At least until the cops arrive.

And I don't even smoke.

Who else will sponsor a Bad Uncle event?

Pure FUD.

Sure they give you a discount on a phone. But over the life of the contract you end up paying them a MINIMUM of about $1,200. You can bet your ass they're not losing money over it. I once saw an add for a "FREE Blackberry!" where, if you looked at the terms and contract would actually cost you $2,160 over the life of the 2 year contact. Minimum!

And what does this article, or my post have to do with Apple? I never once mentioned apple. If you don't like what Apple did with the iPhone, DON'T BUY AN IPHONE.

--------- | iPhone | Nokia E70
Resolution: | 320x480 | 352x416
Storage: | 4 or 8 gigs (fixed). | Unlimited. The E70 can use hot-swappable 2 GB mini SD cards, so you can have as much storage as you want.
Can customize ringtones with your own mp3s: | NO | YES
Can record video: | NO | YES
Screen turns into a smudgy piece of shit after a few minutes of use: | YES | NO
Can send MMS messages: | NO | YES
You have to send your phone to Apple when the battery dies and risk getting your phone lost, stolen, or damaged in transit: Yes. No.
Plays MP3s: | YES | YES
Holds your phone hostage to Apple for new software updates because Apple won't allow everyone to develop applications for it: | YES | NO
Voice dialing: | NO | YES
Can record voice: | NO | YES
Instant messaging: No. Yes.
Can't do fundamental tasks like copy & paste text: Yes. No. Double negative, bitches!

Sadly big corporations don't always realize this and think that since it's just an individual they can push them around but thanks to the internet the little guy can stand up for himself sometimes. Look at what Maddox did to Orbitz over $94 dollars http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=orbitz_blows I know the next time a tech business gives me shit though I'm going to threaten /. you know best buy is regretting their decision now!

Great review here.. http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone Seriously though... when are the p2p encrypted wireless cells gonna take off?

Stop using the term "blogosphere," or any other vomit-inducing "blog-" based word.

"The 'blogosphere' is the new buzz word that has replaced 'information super highway.' It's what idiots like to call a collection of 'blogs,' otherwise known as a tragedy."

-- http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=banish

There are people who can help.

Funny, I watched that movie just yesterday evening. I'm sticking my debian machine in a cupboard and hopefully getting a mac mini on 26th. It'll be my first new computer in about 10 years, after countless cobbled-together win/lin dual-booters.

It's a bit annoying at first; This stereotypical machead spends about 15 minutes telling you about the super new transparent bar. But after that he's doing stuff that just made my jaw drop. Time machine in particular just left me in awe. Sure, I can setup an rsync job in cron and all that crap, but Time Machine made it ridiculously easy.

I urge anybody who thinks that Apples are overpriced to watch the movie. Just sit through the first ten minutes and try to ignore the nausiatingly mac-ish presenter, it's worth it.

I, Robot in a Nutshell

I saw the movie "I, Robot" recently, a film based loosely on a book written by science fiction author Isaac Asimov. In case you're not familiar with Asimov's writing, here's a list of things the movie had in common with the book:

I don't know why, but after the movie I came out of the theater wanting to buy a pair of Converse shoes (vintage 2004), have them delivered to my local FedEx station, drive my MV Augusta SPR motorcycle to pick them up, stop by the shop to have my new JVC CD player installed in my Audi, pick up a couple of Dos Equis on my way home, wash it down with an Ovaltine and then invest what money I have left into a mutual fund with Prudential Life Insurance.

I'm not exaggerating: this movie plugged 5 companies within a 10 minute block of time. That's roughly one advertisement every two minutes. Most whores don't see that kind of action. What makes a good movie good and a movie like this cunny waft is that in a good movie, every shot counts; every word uttered has a purpose. You won't find the characters saying things like "nice shoes" to which Smith replies "vintage 2004." Thanks for the update assholes, we couldn't have figured out that the products you're cramming down our throats actually exist in real life.

Speaking of sloppy story, they could have cut this movie down to 3 minutes and still said everything they said in its current form. Here's how I would have changed this film: start out with a shot of Will Smith in a grocery store buying a 6 pack of Dos Equis beer, except instead of paying, the cashier is a Dos Equis marketing rep who hands Smith a thick wad of bills. Next shot: Smith finishes the last of the beer, walks over to Isaac Asimov's grave and lets loose

  @
  W\/"\ ____
  I'.../RIP \
  LL..|ASIMOV|

Why not? Same message, none of the bullshit.

Other than giving creative control of the movie's content to advertisers, Will Smith stars as a nudist cyborg cop who has a prejudice against robots (seriously). The director had one tight shot on Smith's ass after another. It was enough to make women in the audience squirm. I even overheard a gay guy in front of me say to his partner "wow, this is pretty gay." Then they started making out, not because they necessarily wanted to, but because they wanted to remind people that they have the right, and a theater is a great place to make a political statement.

The only cool thing about the movie is that it has robots in it--or so I thought. They turned something as inherently cool as a master race of robots into a blubbering suck-fest of limp-dicked pussies wimpering endlessly about their feelings. Instead of running around beating women, children, and weaker men, the robots stood around baking cup cakes and talking about boys. It was like being in a candle store without a pipe bomb. Bad news.

Don't see this travesty.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone

Really, touch screens are cool and all that, but also have some disadvantages, as this page will tell you.

I hate to tell you this, but there are these huge stretches of land in the US called the "fly-over" states..perhaps you've heard of them. I doubt they will be ever saturated with anything, much less IPv6 networks. Maybe cows, I dunno. Whenever you get the impulse to imagine a technologically saturated western world where everything is so advanced that it doesn't matter to look anymore, always remember

IDAHO: FAMOUS POTATOES!

For further info:
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=idaho_blows

For those intrigued by the ads, here is where to get started for Nokia development. It is important to note that all applications must be signed (expounded on here), with the option (but not requirement) of doing things through a Symbian Signed certificate.

It should also be noted that Nokia's openness to development in comparison to the iPhone has been suitably documented previously.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=sponsor

Silly me, after paying $1500 for the damn thing, I was walking around under the mistaken impression it was my computer.

come on, fanboys. you can do better.

i do believe he has summed up my feelings on the matter..
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone

On top of that, he made that crack about stabbing Mac users in the eye with a pencil

That's really uncalled for. I always recommend a kick in the groin instead.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=macs_cant

I bet you this guy didn't quite expect that his name would be linked by one of the Internet's most busy web-pages, and not in a good way... I mean seriously, slashdot will accidentally DDoS news agencies due to the large number of visitors. Companies pay small fortunes for that kind of attention... They have now managed to get worldwide bad publicity TWICE due to this laptop. The words "the most expensive $94 Orbitz will ever make" springs to mind. For those of you who don't know what I mean, here's the link: http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=orbitz_blows

2clix were hassling me a while back with cold-calls trying to get me to buy their software. When asked what their software was/did, they described it in pure marketing terms - telling me all the positive effects they supposed it would have on the business, instead of what it's actually used for and what roles it fills. I got their URL so I could look into it when I had time... the use of obnoxious stock photos on every page (see http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=stock_photos) and the anonymous quote "Quite Simply The Best" turned me off from the start. Our brief business relationship ended before it began with me telling 'em to take me off the call list. After getting off the phone with their rep, I felt like I needed a shower... reading this news about 'em isn't really surprising at all.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=iphone

Or, as Maddox puts it:

[stupid lameness filter stupid]iPhone ___ Nokia E70
Screen turns into a smudgy
piece of shit after a few ----------Yes _______ No
minutes of use:

(Formatting fun!)

Holy crap. Assuming that wiki page isn't lying, which would be hard to pull off with some of the hawks watching political pages, that is pretty amazing. A politician with balls as big as maddox's.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=ip hone

Do those "significant gaps and compromises" that you mention include, for example...

Not allowing people to cut & paste text?
Not supporting video recording?
Not supporting the use of MP3s as ring tones?
Using a battery that won't last more than 24 hours?
Using a non-user-replaceable battery?
Not allowing users to add (and hot-swap) memory cards?
Not giving public access to your APIs and encouraging OSS development?
Not supporting 3G?
Not supporting MMS?

Because, you see... Nokia supports all that in most of their phones. The iPhone doesn't, despite being more expensive. And then there's all the free 3rd party software for Symbian, which you simply cannot get (or develop yourself) for the iPhone.

This page says it all, really.

And it's the "pinnacle of human achievement".

As an IT professional, I prefer the S60 series of devices over the iPhone hands down. Symbian has a whole slew of applications available for the platform, including Putty, Citrix, and RDP clients. My E61i has built in wifi, and Nokia has released a SCCP client (Cisco VoIP) that registers with my Cisco CallManager cluster as soon as I enter the building. Combine that with their full Intellisync package, and you've got the sexiest work phone ever. I'll grant you that the average cell phone user would have a better time with the iPhone, but for me it's Nokia all the way.

For a more humorous take on what I'm talking about, check out http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=ip hone">this review.

The Neo is neat and all, but you don't even have to be that open to do better than the iPhone.

The iPhone is explicitly designed to create vendor lock-in with AT&T. If you want a fully functional smartphone that is unlocked by default, you can get something like a Nokia Communicator.

In fact, there are great stacks of phones (all generally unavailable from carriers in the US) that are fully functional smart phones that run on industry-standard Symbian (some even on not-fully-open Linux; hell, even Windows Mobile is better than an iPhone) and have such amazing features as being unlocked and supporting 3rd party apps by default.

Here are some more phones to compare the iPhone to:

• Sony Ericsson P990
• Nokia E70
• Motorola MING

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=ip hone

Maddox covered this recently:

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=ip hone

Seems pretty persuasive...

Khasim, you have been sponsored

Have a nice day.

What about the NokiaE70 (this
links to Maddox's comparison between E70 & IPhone.

Good luck using that terminal and trying to type something more complicated than "cd" and "ls"

I agree with Maddox. The iPhone does nothing worth while that a Nokia E70 can't do better.

She get Maddox's phone... they don't lock down the device.

The iPhone is a piece of shit, and so is your face. Gotta love Maddox.

I've chosen a black background for most of my text because it's easier on the eyes than staring at a white screen. Think about it: your monitor is not a piece of paper, no matter how hard you try to make it one. Staring at a white background while you read is like staring at a light bulb (don't believe me? Try turning off the lights next time you use a word processor). Would you stare at a light bulb for hours at a time? Not if you want to keep your vision.