Slashdot Mirror
Pancake Physics to Cut Batter Splatter
Anonymous Coward writes "The headline just about says it all on this one. A physics grad student in the UK has come up with the mathematical formula for how to flip a pancake and have it land correctly back in the pan. The BBC
has the details."
I am more than capable of making an on topic post here, but I shan't. Instead I'd like to take a moment to talk about my cock, if I may, to familiarize you with the events that are about to take place. It resembles nothing in shape so much as a fire extinguisher; a red cylinder with a circumference about equal to a petri dish and as long as a regulation yardstick, networked with throbbing veins big enough to drive a Matchbox car through, and topped by a nearly luminescent magnificent red head, as big as a mid-size cantaloupe and covered in skin the consistency of #4 grain sandpaper. I could fit your little sister's arm in my urethra.
So I'll come over to your house, introduce yourself to your Mom and talk a little bit about what I'm going to do to your anus, lay down some tarps on the floor, and commence what will no doubt be the crowning achievement of your life, even better than watching your 'fans list' growing in size. I will sodomize you like God was riding on my shoulder whispering instructions into my ear, little miss $$$$$exyGal, and this is how it'll be done.
When i was dating a girl who rather enjoyed being fisted, the first thing I learned was how to 'make the ducky,' or shape your hand into a position that could slip into the vagina with the least resistance. Then, when entrance had been achieved, the position of the hand was changed to a fist to offer more stimulus. Unfortunately for you, my cock cannot make the ducky. It's just going to have to use brute pelvic force to stretch your brown-walled turd canal to it's utmost. You may wish to practice in the intervening hours with King Cobra malt beverage bottles, just to reduce the intense, searing pain a notch or two.
There will be pain, however, and I am not cruel. I will provide you with a damp rag to clutch between your teeth, muffling the grunts and lamentations from your mouth. One would think that my pleasure would be reduced from this measure, but I must confess that I find the sounds of your rupturing colon and the gases escaping sufficiently erotic to continue my explorations. Once my cock has reached it's limit, buried deep inside you like Grant in Grant's Tomb, the true sex will begin. You and I will bond like few people can, and I may finally come to know your affection for mindless fans, which I have never supported and never will, and you will begin to know the blinding joy of forced sodomy.
And, as few people know (well, actually, SexyKellyOsbourne knows, as my pimp, and WipoTroll of course before he killed himself, and John Katz from that time in the bunker when we both thought we were going to die, and PhysicsScholar and RealWorldStuff of course know in exchange for the free education, and CmdrTaco, Hemos, Jamie, Timothy and Pudge know as valued johns, and as Rusty knows because he's from the Kur0shin.org and I fucked him), my penis is covered in a number of barbs, much like a dog's, and during coitus, these prevent my unit from slipping out of the blood-lubricated hole and disrupting my tearing rhythm. Upon orgasm, as pints of spooge rocket out of my pee-hole, burning through whatever they encounter like that burny stuff in the Alien movies, the barms withdraw and my flaccid member can resume it's rightful place in my pants.
Unfortunately, $$$$$exyGal, once I had worked my monster cock all the way up your digestive system, your immense, fat-tittied disgustingness would make it impossible for me to ever have an orgasm again, and my penis would be stuck running parallel to your spinal column for the forseeable future. Of course, I'd cut your arms and legs off to lighten the load a bit, and have my Dad bring over the Makita power sander so I wouldn't have to look at your foolish face with the first little wisps of a female-moustache growing (and I've heard hair grows after you die, so I bet that thing'll look REALLY BITCHIN once you're super dessicated) and I'd just have to wait for you to rot yourself off of my dick, as I'll be damned if we're gonna do any cutting in there. Needless to say, this does not appeal to me.
Sadly, however, I see no other options. Best tell your mom I'm on my way. I'd like peanut butter sandwiches and a tall, cool glass of milk to be waiting for me. It's gonna be a long day.
Your daddy,
--TrollBurger
Must be a slow news day..
http://almostsmart.com
Eating a woman's pussy is about the most wonderful thing you can do for her. It makes her feel loved, admired, sexy, and of course it makes her cum like crazy. Many women prefer it to intercourse, and for most, it is the easiest way to cum with a man. You may have the littlest dick on the planet, but if you give great head, you will be appreciated as a fabulous lover. Yes, it's that important. Besides, lots of women expect it these days - you might as well know what you're doing.
First off, guys seem to have a strange love/hate relationship with women's genitalia. Guys that can't wait to get their dick into one are often reluctant to put their face "down there". For every guy who says he loves to eat pussy, there's another one who's squeamish. Women know this, and it affects their ability to lay back and enjoy the experience. There is nothing more exciting to a woman than to know that her partner finds her delicious. Don't be coy; tell her. When a guy fingers a lady and then smells, licks, sucks the juice off his finger and sighs as if in heaven, she knows this is her lucky day.
What if your sweet lady doesn't smell or taste very sweet? Don't suffer. (Don't complain, either.) Take a nice hot shower or bath together. Lather up both of your bodies and slide them together. It's like a whole body fuck. Soap up her vulva, washing between her outer and inner lips. Spread her lips apart and gently wash her clitoris. Hey, don't stop - this feels great! Run your soapy hand down the crack of her ass, and rub a finger all around her anus. You can stick one finger in and wash around inside too, if you anticipate any anal play, and I suggest you do. But don't put those soapy fingers up her vagina. Instead, rinse them off well and stick one or two inside, making a circular motion. Think about washing the inside of a tall glass - same thing. Now wasn't that fun? And now you can feel free to let your tongue wander anywhere it pleases...
So now what? You've found a comfy spot to play, you've been kissing passionately, your tongues darting around each other's mouths like playful otters. You've moved down to nibble one of her hardening nipples and she's starting to groan, grinding her pelvis against your stomach. STOP. I know it was just starting to get good. But was she really groaning and humping you, or was it your own excitement you were detecting? I strongly prefer to be excited before a guy starts plunging his tongue into my inner recesses. Use your judgement, and kiss, lick, and fondle your way down her stomach, up her thighs, until she's arching up her back trying to get you to eat her. Of course, if she really was groaning and grinding, go for it... I also don't particularly enjoy a guy endlessly nibbling my inner thigh while my clit is quivering in anticipation.
POSITIONS
If the woman you are with is somewhat hesitant about your going down on her, start off with her lying on her back, perhaps half-sitting. Lay down between her legs, with her legs over your shoulders. She may enjoy laying or sitting at the edge of the bed with you kneeling. She can also straddle your face, but be prepared to get very wet. There are endless varieties of positions where you can press your face up to her cunt, some of which strike me as more acrobatic than erotic, but feel free to experiment. And then there's 69...
69 is one of my favorite positions. On the plus side, you both get to enjoy the sublime sensations of getting head, simultaneously. The upside down positioning of a woman's pussy and your mouth is an easy fit and there's more room for your hands. On the negative side, it's a less than ideal position for a woman to give head. Plus, if you need to read this article, you may be better off concentrating your energies on pleasing her, without too much distraction. But even for experienced 69'ers, it's easy to short-change your partner. "It feels soooo good, I'm just gonna stop for a second and concentrate on what you're...aaaarrrgghhh". Get the picture? Some show of will-power is in order.
69 can be done male on top, female on top, or side by side. The latter two are easier, though it's more restful with both partners laying down. Some women love being licked on all fours, so if female-on-top 69 drives her wild, take the hint and find some other ways to eat her in this position. I happen to enjoy male on top, but for many women this is a sure choking position. If a woman can, or wants to try, to deep throat you, this is THE position. When her head is thrust back you can really slide your cock all the way down her throat. But don't forget what you're supposed to be doing!
So there you are staring at it - the mysterious hole from whence you came, and into which you hope to cum again... First, an anatomy lesson...
THE CLITORIS
Before I go any further, a few words about the clitoris, accent on the first syllable. Most of you know it, but for those who don't, it is THE woman's sex organ, period. It may feel great to be fucked vaginally, anally or otherwise, but if the stimulation is not right there, on the clitoris, you're ignoring the place that's going to make her cum, and presumably that's why you're reading this, right? It's right there at the top juncture of her inner lips, a small knob of pink flesh. This is where it's at boys, and don't forget it. Almost any licking and sucking of the labia or vaginal entrance is going to feel just dandy; just remember that this is pleasurable teasing, not the main event. I can't tell you how many guys have thrust their tongues up my vagina thinking that this was going to make me cum. They were wrong. Of course, with a little manual stimulation....but I'm getting ahead of myself.
Women feel differently about how much direct stimulation they can take on their clitoris. Some women will adore it if you suck hard on their exposed clits, others will shriek in pain. You may encounter a woman who is completely unable to take direct stimulation of her clit; the goal is still the same, but you'll have to stimulate it indirectly, such as through her labia. IMPORTANT NOTE: Often, what is unacceptably rough at first may be fine after she's very excited. The fact is, most women really need a good bit of stimulation before a targeted attack on their clitoris, but once they're there, that's where you want to devote your attention.
The key here is go slow, ask questions, and if she's comfortable with it, leave the lights on and really explore. Body language often does tell what feels best, but I promise, she will appreciate your attentiveness if you ask outright. If she seems shy, get her to guide your hands and mouth with her own hand, and pay attention. If she starts bucking up against your mouth and gasping in ragged little breaths, for God's sake, don't use this opportunity to try something different. Just keep doing exactly what you're doing.
THE TONGUE
I want to reiterate, there is almost nothing you can do that won't feel terrific, so relax! I promise, you may be confused and uncertain, but she's in heaven. Any licking and sucking of the labia, vaginal entrance, clitoris, or anal area is going to feel just great, and I'd no sooner tell guys to "do it exactly like this" than I would tell every chef to follow the same recipe. But for those who are compelled to RTFM, here are a few techniques that you might like to try:
Try lapping her pussy from vaginal entrance up to her clit, leaving your tongue soft and jaw relaxed. This is a good way to start your tonguing.
Run your tongue between the inner and outer labia on one side, while holding the two together with your lips. Good job, now do the other side.
Fuck her pussy with your tongue - in and out, around and around, etc. This feels nice. Not wonderful or incredible or earth-shaking; nice.
Spread her outer lips with your hand. Then, with your tongue pointed and stiff, gently flick here and there. Feel free to roam, but keep coming back to her clit. This drives some women wild, and others can't take it. Some may prefer that you always leave your tongue soft, so when you try this, pay attention to whether those moans are ecstacy or pain.
The following techniques should not be introduced until your partner is really hot (i.e. she's no longer coherent). These are very intense actions which may be "too much" for some women, even when nearing orgasm.
With her clit still exposed, give it a quick little suck - pulling it into your mouth briefly and letting it go. This is a lot like licking a bit of cake batter off of your pinky. This feels incredible, and is a fine thing to do if you feel like torturing her (see PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER below).
Take her exposed clit into your mouth and gently (at first, anyway) suck on it, simultaneously flicking your tongue over and around it. This can be done very lightly or very aggressively, and combined with fingering, will usually rapidly produce an intense orgasm.
Another choice technique involves rolling your tongue into a tube. If you can't do this with your tongue, you can't learn it - it's genetic. For those who can, this works best in an inverted or 69 position. Roll your tongue into a tube around the shaft of her clitoris. Slide it up and down; in effect, your tongue makes a tiny pussy for her clit to fuck. This also is likely to bring her over the edge.
FINGERS
Fingers are a valuable adjunct to eating pussy. Most women masturbate by pressing a finger or fingers over their clit, possibly "thru" the skin of their inner or outer lips, and vigorously rubbing in a circular or back-and-forth direction. You can do this too, and it is most helpful to ask, or better yet, have her show you how she likes it done. You will never be a good lover until you can bring your woman to climax with your hands. When you fuck her from behind, or up her ass, or really in any position which doesn't allow her to simultaneously rub her vulva against your body, reach down or around and rub her clit. I know it's distracting, but just do it anyway. One important point to note: make sure that your fingers are well lubricated. There is nothing more uncomfortable (and sometimes downright painful) than a dry finger roughly rubbed across one's clitoris.
Of course, that's not all you can do with your fingers. One technique which is very exciting is to spread her lips wide apart with one hand, and with your index finger straight like a pencil, flick the side of it rapidly across her clit. This motion alone will often bring a woman to orgasm. Combining this with the addition of some tongue action elsewhere is nothing short of bliss.
Sticking one or more fingers inside her vagina is also wonderful. You can simply move them in and out (this feels best with at least two or three fingers, pushed in hard), or wriggling them around. A particularly intense motion is to face your hand so that you have two fingers inside her with your palm facing the front of her body. Now move your fingers rapidly, as if waving hello. You are aiming to stimulate a particular part of the woman's vagina - namely the lower anterior (front) part. When combined with sucking her clit, this is nearly certain to bring her to a fast and intense climax.
An excellent way to begin manual stimulation is to stick one (and later two) fingers inside her, with your palm cupped over the mons area. I'm talking about that fleshy "mound" over her pubic bone. Your finger goes in and out and the ball of your hand is pressed hard against her vulva. You may want to rub or even shake the entire area with your palm.
Fingers also do nice things to tight little butt holes, but that's a whole other story...
ANAL PLAY
This stuff is purely optional. If anal play doesn't turn you on, don't do it. If you're uncomfortable, she'll pick up on your feelings and start wondering if it's her pussy that's turning you off. Don't feel that you can't be a good lover without anal play; you can.
Cleanliness is of the essence. (remember that nice soapy shower?) Scoop out some luscious juices (from a very wet pussy) with your finger and rub it around her anus. (If she isn't well lubricated, saliva works too.) If that's all you or she feels comfortable with, fine - it still feels great. But I think most women enjoy the feel of a finger pushed up their ass while they're being fucked or eaten. You need to be gentle, possibly even leaving your finger still. Try moving it in and out a little, or around in a circle. If she starts moaning, you know you're doing something right.
It's really fun to feel a woman's anus rhythmically squeezing your finger as she cums. (And it's great for her, too) You're probably thinking about what that would feel like around your dick, and it's something you should certainly explore. Ass-fucking is somewhat out of the scope of this article, but suffice to say, if she doesn't like a finger up her butt, she sure as hell won't want your big dick up there. Even if she does enjoy this sort of play, she may still be somewhat apprehensive about putting something so large up there. The keys to success are sufficient (i.e. copious amounts of) lubrication (a water-soluble type such as K-Y, which is safe for condoms), relaxation on her part, and a slow, gentle, approach. She'll certainly tell you if she wants you to thrust harder or deeper. And remember, if you want to feel that delicious squeezing around your cock, reach around and diddle that clit!
As for anallingus - why not? Don't feel like you HAVE to do it to satisfy your woman. But if the idea turns you on, great. Let your tongue rove as it pleases. It's not necessary to actually put your tongue inside her butt to stimulate the area. Back and forth, around and around, you get the picture.
One hygiene note: once that finger (or your penis) has been inside her ass, don't even think about putting it anywhere else. Carelessness in this regard can cause a horrendous infection.
MENSTRUATION
I haven't met a lot of men who are completely comfortable going down on a woman when she has her period. But some are. Most women are at their horniest before and sometimes during their period. You should definitely find a way to make her cum when she's bleeding, be it thru intercourse, manual, or oral stimulation. If you feel comfortable going down on her, great. It's perfectly safe. You may suggest that she insert a tampon, and then wash up. (As you now know, you don't need to get anywhere near her vagina to make her cum.) Or you could lay down a few old towels, turn out the lights, and forget about it.
PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER
I think variety is crucial. Some guy posted an article detailing a road map of kissing and licking (first here, then here, etc.) Much better to do the unexpected; sometimes a hungry, aggressive approach, other times a laid-back, leisurely one. You can even even include your nose, or your chin into the act. Start slow, that's the key, and let your lover guide the speed of the crescendo. In all cases, start gently. Roughness and clumsiness are big turn-offs. As she gets more and more excited, pay more attention to her clitoris. When she's three breathes away from cumming, moving your mouth off or away from her clit is agony. That's fine if you're intentionally torturing her, just understand that this is what you are doing. The only prohibition is to be reasonably gentle with her clit. Nibbling or biting is fine elsewhere, but we're talking about a sensitive spot.
Speaking of prolonging the agony... I think this is great fun. Bring your partner just to the edge of orgasm, and stop. This is not easy unless you really know your lover well. Instead, just have her help you. Say, "Grab my head and stop me just before you think you're gonna cum." Then take your sweet time. Blow on her clit, take it into your mouth just briefly, flick it just the very slightest bit. You will have this woman squirming and moaning like she's dying. Finger her deeply, enjoy the ecstasy you are imparting, and finally, have pity. Let the poor woman cum.
UUUUNNNNGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!! (or, I'M COMING!!!)
Okay, she's practically suffocating you, she's pressed so hard against your face; she's screaming and bucking up in the air; you feel her pussy contracting wildly - how long should you keep it up?? The simple answer is, until she makes you stop. Some women may stop you after five seconds from the start of their climax, others may be able to roll right into another orgasm if you keep going. Do come up for air, but remember, her excitement does not drop off as sharply as yours does. Play it safe by continuing the stimulation.
How many times does she need to cum? Some women are very content to have one orgasm. A whole lot of women would really like to cum again, but need about five minutes to recoup. Many women are so sensitive right after they cum that they may push your head violently away. This doesn't necessarily mean they've had enough, only that you need to stop for a few minutes. In fact most women, given a short rest between, are capable of cumming again and again. A smaller percentage of women are able to cum repeatedly with continued stimulation. This is the much-touted multiple-orgasm that is experienced by a minority of women. I know this makes it difficult to know when enough is enough, but there's a simple answer: ask her.
GODI'MSOEXCITEDITFEELSGREATBUTIJUSTCAN'TCOME
It happens to all of us sometimes - distraction, embarrassment, anxiety, or just an inability to "let go". What do you do about it? The first question is, can she easily bring herself to a climax in the privacy of her own home. If the answer is no - then she needs to do some homework. There are two books on the subject that I know of: For Yourself: The Fulfillment of Female Sexuality by Lonnie Barbach, and Sex for One: The Joy of Selfloving by Betty Dodson; pick up one. Then tell her to read it, study it, and practice, practice, practice!
Now if your partner is orgasmic only when alone - ask her point blank: "Is there something different I can do?" Many women are shy about criticizing their lovers, but if asked outright will surprise you with a very specific answer. It may be a simple matter of mechanics, like a little to right please, or not so rough, or more pressure and faster. Ah... perfect.
But suppose everything is wonderful. She says you're doing everything right but she just can't cum. There are two probable causes: selfconsciousness and/or self-loathing. For women who can't help watching themselves, the best approach is to eliminate anything that focuses her attention on what the two of you are doing. This is a "be here now" kind of thing - definitely not an introspective activity. Get that mirror off the ceiling. Dim the lights or turn them off completely. Put on some soft music. Share a glass of port. (I said A glass - getting drunk will definitely not help). Have her lay on her back, or propped up comfortably with some pillows. This is not the time for her to sit on your face, or the edge of the bed, or standing up against a wall. Arrange a time when you can devote a long period to eating her pussy, and then just keep it up. Forget everything I said about asking her questions - just close your eyes and get into it. I know this can be a difficult and exhausting exercise, but she will be extravagantly thankful for your efforts. It gets easier each time. If all else fails, get accustomed to masturbating together. Gradually begin to add your stimulation to her own, right before she's about to cum anyway. Over time, you can take over completely.
For women who themselves feel that their cunts are dirty or distasteful, all of the above methods may be helpful, but the underlying issue must also be addressed. I am amazed at how many women are ambivalent about their own genitals. They don't love "that part" of their body, and they can't believe that you would either. Yes, it is important to be clean. But clean means a daily shower which includes washing the vulva. It doesn't mean vainly attempting to remove every trace of smell or taste. The natural fragrance and secretions of a healthy woman are beautiful and erotic. Hopefully you agree (and if not, try hard to cultivate this attitude). When she learns to love her pussy, she will be infinitely more comfortable with your loving it too.
How to Eat Pussy
Hey, I have a lot of respect for all you guys who like to eat pussy because there are too few of you out there. And I'm not the only woman who says this. Furthermore, some of you guys who are giving it the old college try are not doing too well, so maybe this little lesson will help you out. When a woman finds a man who gives good head, she's found a treasure she's not going to let go of too quickly. This is one rare customer and she knows it. She won't even tell her girlfriends about it or that guy will become the most popular man in town. So, remember, most guys can fuck, and those who can usually do it satisfactorily, but the guy who gives good head, he's got it made.
Most women are shy about their bodies. Even if you've got the world's most gorgeous woman in bed with you, she's going to worry about how you like her body. Tell her it's beautiful, tell her which parts you like best, tell her anything, but get her to trust you enough to let you down between her legs.
Now stop and look at what you see. Beautiful, isn't it? There is nothing that makes a woman more unique than her pussy. I know. I've seen plenty of them. They come in all different sizes, colors and shapes; some are tucked inside like a little girl's cunnie and some have thick luscious lips that come out to greet you. Some are nested in brushes of fur and others are covered with transparent fuzz. Appreciate your woman's unique qualities and tell her what makes her special.
Women are a good deal more verbal than men, especially during love-making. They also respond more to verbal love, which means, the more you talk to her, the easier it will be to get her off. So all the time you're petting and stroking her beautiful pussy, talk to her about it.
Now look at it again. Gently pull the lips apart and look at her inner lips, even lick them if you want to. Now spread the tops of her pussy up until you can find her clit. Women have clits in all different sizes, just like you guys have different sized cocks. It doesn't mean a thing as far as her capacity for orgasm. All it means is more of her is hidden underneath her foreskin.
Whenever you touch a woman's pussy, make sure your finger is wet. You can lick it or moisten it with juices from inside her. Be sure, by all means, to wet it before you touch her clit because it doesn't have any juices of it's own and it's extremely sensitive. Your finger will stick to it if it's dry and that hurts. But you don't want to touch her clit anyway. You have to work up to that. Before she becomes aroused, her clit is too delicate to be handled.
Approach her pussy slowly. Women, even more so than men, love to be teased. The inner part of her thigh is her most tender spot. Lick it, kiss it, make designs on it with the tip of your tongue. Come dangerously close to her pussy, then float away. Make her anticipate it.
Now lick the crease where her leg joins her pussy. Nuzzle your face into her bush. Brush your lips over her slit without pressing down on it to further excite her. After you've done this to the point where your lady is bucking up from her seat and she's straining to get more of you closer to her, then put your lips right on top of her slit.
Kiss her, gently, then harder. Now use your tongue to separate her pussy lips and when she opens up, run your tongue up and down between the layers of pussy flesh. Gently spread her legs more with your hands. Everything you do with a woman you're about to eat must be done gently.
Tongue-fuck her. This feels define. It also teases the hell out of her because by now she wants some attention given to her clit. Check it out. See if her clit has gotten hard enough to peek out of it's covering. If so, lick it. If you can't see it, it might still be waiting for you underneath. So bring your tongue up tot he top of her slit and feel for her clit. You may barely experience it's presence. But even if you can't feel the tiny pearl, you can make it rise by licking the skin that covers it. Lick hard now and press into her skin.
Gently pull the pussy lips away and flick your tongue against the clit, hood covered or not. Do this quickly. This should cause her legs to shudder. When you sense she's getting up there toward orgasm, make your lips into an O and take the clit into your mouth. Start to suck gently and watch your lady's face for her reaction. If she can handle it, begin to suck harder. If she digs it, suck even harder. Go with her. If she lifts her pelvis into the air with the tension of her rising orgasm, move with her, don't fight her. Hang on, and keep your hot mouth on her clit. Don't let go. That's what she'll be saying too: 'Don't stop. Don't ever stop!'
There's a reason for that, most men stop too soon. Just like with cock sucking, this is something worth learning about and worth learning to do well. I know a man who's a lousy fuck, simply lousy, but he can eat pussy like nobody I know and he never has trouble getting a date. Girls are falling all over him.
But back to your pussy eating session...There's another thing you can do to intensify your woman's pleasure. You can finger-fuck her while she's enjoying your clit-licking talents. Before, curing or after. She'll really like it. In addition to the erogenous zones surrounding her clit, a woman has another extremely sensitive area at the roof of her vagina. This is what you rub up against when you're fucking her. Well, since your cock is pretty far away from your mouth, your fingers will have to do the fucking.
Take two fingers. One is too skinny and three is too wide and therefore can't get deep enough. Make sure they're wet so you don't irritate her skin. Slide them inside, slowly at first, then a little faster. Fuck her with them rhythmically. Speed up only when she does. Listen to her breathing.
She'll let you know what to do. If you're sucking her clit and finger-fucking her at the same time, you're giving her far more stimulation than you would be giving her with your cock alone. So you can count on it that she's getting high on this. If there's any doubt, check her out for symptoms. Each woman is unique. You may have one who's nipples get hard when she's excited or only when she's having an orgasm. Your girl might flush red or begin to tremble. Get to know her symptoms and you'll be a more sensitive lover.
When she starts to have an orgasm, for heaven's sakes, don't let go of that clit. Hang in there for the duration. When she starts to come down from the first orgasm, press your tongue along the underside of the clit, leaving your lips covering the top. Move your tongue in and out of her cunt. If your fingers are inside, move them a little too, gently though, things are extremely sensitive just now.
If you play your cards right, you'll get some multiple orgasms this way. A woman stays excited for a full hour after she's had an orgasm. Do you realize the full impact of that information? The potential? One woman was clocked at 56 orgasms at one sitting. Do you know what effect you would have on a woman you gave 56 orgasms to? She'd be yours as long as you wanted her.
The last advice I have for you is this: After you've made her come, make her your slave by giving her the best head she's ever had, don't leave her alone just yet. Talk to her, stroke her body, caress her breasts. Keep making love to her quietly until she's come all the way down. A man can get off and go to sleep in the same breath and feel no remorse, no sense of loss. But a woman by nature requires some sensitivity from her lover in those first few moments after sex.
Oral sex can be the most exciting sexual experiences you can have. But it's what you make it. Take your time, practice often, pay attention to your lover's signals, and most of all, enjoy yourself.
Female Oral Sex Techniques
TASTE:
In my experience, one of the main reasons that partners avoid female oral sex is due to a percieved or even experienced poor taste. While it is true that women run the range from pleasant (tasty!) to sour or uric tasting, there are easy steps to ensure that your partner will be tasting her sweetest.
First and most obviously, a good vigorous shower will do much to neutralize the taste of your partner. In fact, oral sex in the shower, while not a favorite method of mine, has a completely neutral taste if you stick to the upper regions of your partner's sex. If your partner has not showered recently, or has physically exerted herself recently, her taste will be much stronger. This, however, can be a good thing!
Secondly, foreplay will improve upon both the taste and the experience in general if your can get her juices flowing. I have never found an extremely aroused, wet woman to taste unpleasant. Quite the contrary!
FOREPLAY:
Do it! Take your time! Have fun! Experiment! A common male misunderstanding is that females are aroused most through physical contact. Not true. I have aroused women greatly simply by acting sexy. Tension is a wonderful tool, use it. If you can build tension to the point where the barest touch sends electric shivers through both of you, you can't lose! Similarly, even the best love techniques will not turn on a woman who isn't in the mood. (If you can get her in the mood, well then you're talking.)
Take your time, explore your partner (there's a lot more there than nipples and a clitoris!), build tension, have fun.
POSITIONS:
There are two basic positions that I have found very versitile and succesful. For a very comfortable session, have her lie on her back with legs spread and knees bent slightly. Lie on your stomach between her legs, put your right arm under her left leg and your left arm under her right - somewhat of an intimate hug. Now you should find your head situated conveniently and comfortably near the center of your attention.
Less comfortable, but a bit wilder is the following. Lie on your back, prop a couple of pillows (or fold one over) under your head. Have your partner kneel facing you with one knee on each side of your head, above your shoulders. The sexy part of this position (IMHO) is that your partner can look down at you and watch you eating her out. (Yum) Versatility and comfort are reduced for the giver, so I only occasionally partake in this position.
These are by no means the only positions. Again, experiment, have fun. If you can find a bed where your partner can lie down with her legs dangling off the bed and resting flat on the floor, you're in luck. Now you can have her sit just at the edge of the bed, lie back, and give you plenty of access while you kneel/sit in front of her sex.
GEOGRAPHY:
Woman are very different in some respects of their genitalia, but the major parts are the same. A woman's sex from the oral sex point of view consists of two sets of lips (outer and inner) that meet just below the vaginal opening and some variable distance above the clitoris; the vaginal opening (immediately above the nether meeting of above-mentioned lips), a smooth section of skin between the vaginal opening and the clitoris (I have no clue as to its technical name, hereafter it will be refered to as the "scav") and the clitoris and its surrounding folds.
If you get the chance, explore your partner in a location with decent lighting. Use your hand to spread her sex and explore her, find out what's where and what's what. Like I said earlier, women are different. Especially the location and shape of the clitoris. It can be buried, protruding, surrounded by many folds of flesh, or hanging out it the open. The best method I have found for finding your partner's clitoris (If all else fails, ask!), is to place a finger at the very base of her sex and gently run it up her scav until you feel a slight bump. That's it.
OK, ENOUGH OF THE DETAILS, NOW THE NITTY-GRITTY:
So your partner is showered, excited and f
Troll 92 of 209 from the annals of the Troll Library .
His secret is revealed: The angular velocity of the object equals the square root of Pi, times the gravity divided by the distance the pancake is from the elbow times four - that is how to get the pancake back in the pan.
Seriously, mimicing real life movement in mathematical forumla is a tough one (that's why we don't see any battlemechs walking around, or tons of popular robots in every house hold.
--------
Free your mind.
Americans should bear in mind that what are called "pancakes" in England are called "crepes" in America. What are called "pancakes" in America are called "Scotch pancakes" in the south of England, and "drop scones" in Scotland and the north of England. Meanwhile, "flapjacks" are a kind of oaty biscuit. Confused yet?
GROGGS: alive and well and living in
It will make sure the pancake will land back in the pan, as long as you understand the formula.
Understanding something does not equate to being able to do it.
I understand how a plane flies, but I can't fly one.
FOR A NIGGER!
Buttfuck!
MmMmm... Pancakes...
Nevrar
But then I use a spatula
Jason
ProfQuotes
But since most of us geeks are pretty inept when it comes to anything physical, I still think my pancakes gonna land on the floor, no matter what formulas I apply.
Now if we could only have some kind of a pancake flipping robot.....
"Entropy is the bad-guy, and he is everywhere"
It's true, Buttfuck!
1. Imagine a beowulf cluster of THOSE crepes!
...
2. In Soviet Russia, the pancake batter flips YOU!!
3. News for nerds, stuff that MATTERS???
4. Microsoft is evil, needs to stop trying to monopolize our pancakes!
5.
6. Profit!!!
"This is Zombo Com, and welcome to you who have come to Zombo Com" - www.zombo.com
I batter splattered in my trousers.
"A pancake in the UK has come up with the mathematical formula for how to flip a physics grad student and have him land correctly back in the pan. The BBC has the details."
I am British BTW, so that means I think pancakes are pancakes, not those HUGE dripping in syrup (I wonder why Americans are overweight) batter mountains that you in the US eat ;-)
p.s. I'm joking, taking a rise... I love US based pancakes although I've only ever eaten them in Haiti at the Villa Creole. But it's a statistical fact that the average American is overweight and I'm sure all this oversize stuff you do is the cause of it.
Conversion Rate Optimisation French / English consultant
It's true, splattered.
If you butter both sides, will it land on its edge?
A better question, what if you butter the edge as well?
Not sure about other countries but last Tuesday (4th) was Shrove Tuesday in the UK when we all make pancakes. For the religious amongst you the word 'Shrove' refers to the practice of confessing of sins, then afterwards the fast of Lent could be considered a penance of faults committed. Thats why the BBC ran the story on Tuesday. However, most of us just love eating the pancakes!
-- "Can't sleep, clowns will eat me!"
There is a serious game (with tournaments and all) which is somewhat similar to this. It's called tiddlywinks
So no problem for most geeks then...
Is that Hans Blix in the article's photo? I long have expected the UK to be in possession of a proscribed pancake making machine able of launching a pancake in excess of 150km. In other news, Rumsfeld demands accounting for 1.5 tons of missing pancake batter.
... is what I want to know. ... sportsmen. Um.
These guys wouldn't know their elbows from their asses, the way it sounds. "It's all in the wrist" is a rule well-known to tennis players, golfers, and come to think of it, other, uh
I'll stop my rant there, I think.
yes, we have no bananas
In Soviet Russia, Pancake flips you!
AFAIUI it simply means that the pancake needs to spin at such a rate that it will flip 180 degrees between leaving the pan and returning. Given that it will not fall back flat unless the flip is 180n degrees, n integral, this is pretty blindingly obvious.
Unfortunately, the equation is just that and doesn't tell you how to achieve flip rate nirvana. So here is my guide:
- First, use a nonstick pan with a gently sloping edge.
- Second, use just enough oil to ensure the crepe can slide around smoothly.
- Third, in order to flip, start by lowering the far edge of the pan so the crepe starts to slide towards the edge.
- Then, as the crepe reaches the edge, rotate the elbow upwards so that the crepe slides off the edge in an upward direction. This provides the spin. The speed doesn't need to be too high. As the crepe flips over, catch it with the pan horizontal.
- Start with small crepes and build up.
- When I was first shown this technique in a creperie in Normandy, by the end of the evening I could flip them up to ceiling height and still recover them.
Creperies that use precooked crepes made on industrial conveyor belts are of course beyond the pale.Panurge has posted for the last time. Thanks for the positive moderations.
I think you meant:
In Heaven, the police are British, the lovers are Italian, the cooks are French, the engineers are German, and it's all organized by the Swiss.
In Hell, the police are German, the lovers are Swiss, the cooks are British, the engineers are French, and it's all organized by the Italians.
They do research on pancakes, moon mining, curry (chicken tikka masala is the national dish) and other inane "foreign" things. But when it comes to making an Operating System or even choosing one for their schools, they simply turn to America and say, "Give us Microsoft". Amazing.
If you keep throwing chairs, one day you'll break windows....
Sure, knowing the formula is exactly the same things as being able to do is, but didn't anyone else notice that they didn't actually give this "formula" that they claim is so important?
I'm an American. I love this country and the freedoms that we used to have.
Please note that the parent post is infact, not funny at all. It should not be moderated as such. Thankyou.
Stop kidding yourself. Even I had a bigger cock than you do.
I'm a girl too! See naked chicks in my journal!
Shouldn't that be, "A pancake IN SOVIET RUSSIA..."? :)
They that would sacrifice their
Will IHOP use this new technology?
The following statement is false.
The previous statement is true.
Welcome to my world.
On shorve Tuesday I did try my best to flip pancakes the traditional way I found that I can't flip. What I really needed was something like the JML all american pancake maker. Bascially a frying pan with a lid that you can turn over. Now that would be cool
Rus
- Who really needs his first cup of coffee -
Cheap UK and US VPS
Bravo! Three cheers for Trollburger! Your anal spelunking should be seen by all slashdotters, and praised for its form, substance, and anatomical correctness. Please mod parent up!
...although less spectacular
l
http://web.mit.edu/newsoffice/nr/1995/40409.htm
Pancakes flip you!
dammit!
damn infomercials....
Chicago2600.net more than a lifestyle, its a survival trait.
ok this is geekland! Somebody provide a reference rather than "your nation stinks more than my nation!" (oh ok it is /. I spose).
Come on then, somebody dig up stats, are the good people of the US the fattest in the world? or at least how do they compare with UK, and Oz, and say the French and Italians, and err, I dunno, some other non Western country, Japan? Egypt?
I'd love to know where the USA is on an international scale, say of % of inhabitants overweight...
I tried flipping a pancake, Once.
The ensuing mess encouraged me not to try it again. (Nothing ruins the meal more than cleaning up a half-cooked pancake off the floor)
If these guys can come up with some sort of mess free "practice pancake" kit with detailed instructions that can be read without a degree in math. I would be very interested.
if I ever get another story rejected by slashdot, I'll shoot myself
The 'right' way?
Like everything else, the right way isn't defined by some sort of educational institution.
Does your method produce edible and tasty omlettes and pancakes?
Then it's the right way, and damned the line cooks.
It's not the oversized portions.
It's the fact that we're lazy pigs, waddling in our own mess. (Yeah, I'm an American, I'm allowed to say that.)
We sit at desk jobs from nine to five, then drive three blocks home from work in an SUV, and sit on the couch, or in front of the computer. Finally, we go directly to bed. Do not pass Exercise Bike. Do not burn 200 calories.
Finally physics research that has some practical use!
Apparently this guy isn't the only one interested in pancake flipping. Take a look at this paper entitled "Bounds for sorting by prefix reversal" (AKA Pancake flipping problem) co-published by one William H. Gates...
<Scotty>
.com/WIn/Xmas/blow.wav
I'm giving it all she's got, Captain. If I push it any harder, the whole thing'll blow!
<commic_relief>
http://www.stinsv.com/WIn/Xmas/blow.wav
</commic_relief>
</Scotty>
http://www.stinsv
...still no cure for cancer.
i can now finish my pancake simulator
fnord
Furry cows moo and decompress.
Oh yes, and if you look in your history books you'll find that C owes a lot to a certain language called BCPL developed by Martin Richards at Cambridge University in the 60's ...
How to help people to kill other people. Nothing personal, you understand. This is just for the money.
4 26 ,00.html
http://www.guardian.co.uk/Iraq/Story/0,2763,908
hmm . . . I notice that this formula does not factor in mass of the pancake. this makes me wonder, being not-so-smart in physics, would this formula apply for any size pancake?? and how about objects other than pancakes? could I flip say, a thanksgiving turkey and still have it land perfectly in the pan, using this formula??
and why do Scots like cheese in their pancakes?? don't they know the proper way to do anything is the American way, i.e. sugar and syrup??
Bored and tired minds want to know!!
All I ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work.
This is one of the least trollish comments I've read on this thread (though that isn't saying much). This guy just described my life spot on. I'm neither American nor fat, but in both cases I can only thank my parents. There but for the grace of god go I.
Considering this is an article about one of the many traditional annual face-stuffing days westerners celebrate, it's hardly trolling to point out how many people have, or think they have, no time to get any excercise.
Stressed-out, over-fed, under-excercised = early death. The solution is not to diet (=less food, but more stress and still no excercise), but to get plenty of excercise (helps with stress, and you can eat all you like because your body turns it into muscle or motion rather than fat).
In my final year at university, I quit smoking and started swimming just under a mile four times a week. It was the best six months of my life - I was relaxed, I had plenty of energy, muscles even started appearing! Then the exams came along, followed by life as a code-monkey, and here I am smoking, lazy, stressed and eating like a vacuum cleaner. Time to resurrect that lapsed gym membership, I think.
"The Milliard Gargantubrain? A mere abacus - mention it not."
Well, where I come from, we don't use no spatulas to toss pancakes... (Although some more cautious people do slip them out of the pan onto a plate, then drop them back in upside down.) English pancakes are so wide and thin that a spatula's likely to just tear them. Instead you have to use the showing-off-method.
;-)
First you make a circular movement with the pan to ensure that the pancake hasn't stuck and overcome static friction.
Then you tilt the end of the pan down slightly and make a short, sharp inward movement, to get the pancake sliding outwards.
Then you sharply flick the pan up, so that the pancake goes between one and two feet in the air (more if you're feeling cocky) and also spins enough that it lands in the pan the other way up.
I'll be very impressed if they invent a machine which can repeatably toss pancakes. There are an awful lot of variables, which he seems to ignore. But then he is a physicist, not an engineer.
I asked a (native) British collegue about it, and this was his reply:
Ahh the wonders of pancacke day or as the French call it Mardi Gras Fat tuesday. This is the day before the start of Lent (crazy Christian starvation festival, preparing mind and body for the Easter celebrations etc). Typically people used to use up all their fatty things on this day such as butter, eggs and lard etc, coz it was not the done thing to be eating lard cakes when everybody else was eating celery.
Thus the pancake tradition started. Of course, all the religous nonsense has largely disappeared but the pancakes remain in British Culture.
As far as the tossing equation goes, thats just the work of a whacked out English ale swilling academics, and is an essential part of British inventiveness and ingenuity. (You can't make great discoveries all of the time)
Hope that helps and thank you for your interest in Britain.
:-)
"Fix it? It has been disintegrated, by definition it cannot be fixed!" - Gru in Despicable Me.
I do believe it is time that someone introduced Europe to the concept of the 'spatula'. We sort a solved this whole pancakes on the floor dilehma a looooooooong time ago . . .
You know what? While we're at it, let's give China forks and spoons.
I mean, don't you have to factor in the surface of the frypan? What about teflon versus some tatty old iron pan? Did they butter or oil it first and if so, how much?
What about the consistency of the batter and the right moment at which to flip it? I'm no Pancake Scientist but I bet a realllllly runny pancake is more likely to splatter the ceiling than one with the fluid dynamics of week-old oatmeal
A "conundrum that has taxed pancake flippers since the dawn" (dawn of time, or yesterday morning?) needs a rigid set of controls in place!
Maybe they need to determine the perfect recipe before firing up that stove?
oh well, back to the chopping board...
I know this is really off topic, but it is on, if the topic is "reasonibly absurd science". In Nature last December, they decided to publish a short note about an Austrailian matehmatician's work on The Best Way To Lace Your Shoelaces
No joke.
BBC has something -- color commentary might be the best description. But to say that the linked BBC article has the details is just plain wrong.
...You really do need to use math every day.
Mmmmmm......
Go here to create your own Slashdot dis
He didn't calculate exactly how much butter and Canadian Maple Syrup to put on these pancakes when they have been flipped so exactingly. :D
*Hmm it's 5am here where I type this, maybe I should go make some 'cakes for breakfast!*
You must master your joystick like a fisherman masters bait! - Gimpy
I make my H-1Bs flip my pankakes for free! And if they don't I deport their asses!!!
And, as a pilot, I suggest that most people don't have a clue how a plane flies until they learn how to fly one -- even if they're familiar with the underlying physics. I spent several months reading about aircraft operation and theory before starting flying lessons. I could recite entire sections of the Aircraft Flying Handbook from memory, but my first hour of actual flight proved how little I knew.
Every day they sit and worship a device invented by John Logie Baird, a Brit.
"I am not bound to please thee with my answers" [William Shakespeare]
It's actually easier (unless you have a very heavy pan, or geeky small /.-muscels) to flip the entire pan _with_ the pancake still innit.
Of course we have spatulas. How else do you think we scrape the ice off our cars on cold winter mornings?
This post contains benzene, nitrosamines, formaldehyde and hydrogen cyanide.
But I'm not sure that we are convinced enough to make Spatula City successfull in Europe.
If you still think we should use spatulas, why don't you send a Virtual Spatula to prove your case.
Here's my rifle.
*Hands over the rifle*
*Boom*
*Picks up the rifle from ground*
You shouldn't use eggs for 95% of the training. Put a piece of toast in the pan and flip it until it lands gently. Also with good technique for eggs (over and omlettes), the first part out of the pan is coming back into about the middle of the pan before last part has left the pan. This avoids the impact onto the pan that can cause yolks to break and splatter of butter/margarine/etc.
A former line cook and now a software engineer.
Maybe these scientists would have been better off taking a couple classes in cooking and spending time with their families having dinner parties.
Ah hah! Now we know who has been posting as AC for all these years!
Everyone knows the best, and really the only way to eat a pancake is with maple syrup. And I'm talkin' pure 100% straight from a little indie sugar shack in Quebec kind of maple syrup. None of that store bought junk that's only 15%(sometimes 0%) maple syrup. What do they think we are? 15% kids? We want 100% syrup for 100% kids
And That's My 2 Cents, Eh!
Anthropic principle: We see the universe the way it is because if it were different we would not be here to see it.
There is something seriously wrong with the education system when a grad student gets a masters in physics for writing a thesis on flipping a pancake.
What's next? Maybe, for his doctoral thesis, he should write a formula for the proper amount of syrup to be used based on it's rate of obsorbtion by the pancake.
A pancake in SOVIET RUSSIA has come up with the mathematical formula for how to flip a physics grad student and have him land correctly back in the pan. Pravda has the details.
huh huh.... yeah that was cool.
My original post seems to have geerated a lot of interest - more than any other perhaps; yet, my post is rated 1 and many 'replies' at 3!! Amazing!! Where did I go wrong?? Atleast I should've got +3 Interesting?
If you keep throwing chairs, one day you'll break windows....
...but the english tend to use gallons of lard when cooking at home...
I'm English and (unsurprisingly, as I live in England) so are most of the people that I know. There isn't any lard in my house. Or, from what I've seen when eating at friends' houses, anywhere else.
The supermarket aisles devote about 50 times more space to butters and margarines than they do to lard, so that suggests that demand for lard isn't exactly huge.
Perhaps, like all Frenchmen having smelly breath or all Australians being called Bruce, this is one of another one of those urban myths that you Americans have bought into?
(BTW, "Lard! Eat this Shit and DIE!" is a reference to the late, great, Bill Hicks. Great comedian. Great loss.)
"Accept that some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue." - David Brent, Wernham Hogg
We just missed International Pancake day! This would have been great for the race!
His theoretical work laid the groundwork for students designing a pancake-tossing machine, which could one day become a feature in every home.
Or it makes it into the next edition of this.
Someone is wrong on the Internet!
I am happy to see that someone has finally put mathematics to good use! This is a helluvalot better than perfecting atomic bomb efficiency.
Yeah, but that means he will be more accurate by roughly 5% because he won't be assuming that pi is 'nearly' 3 ;-)
-WolfWithoutAClause
"Gravity is only a theory, not a fact!"thats some flippin impressive maths! :p
[DUCKS]
Karma: NaN
Sorry, but the dimension of "the square root of Pi, times the gravity divided by the distance the pancake is from the elbow times four" equals the angular_acceleration_and not the angular_velocity_! Do the math ;-)
Pakcake Flips You !
I've read this before and discarded it. Try this as a simple proof that this guy has missed the point. Take a sheet of normal paper, hold one edge just below your lips and blow. You will see the far end of the sheet rise up. This is without any pressure on the underside of the sheet. Now blow equally hard on the underside on the paper. You should see the paper rise but by a smaller amount. What the author of the article you quote missed was that the "sucking" force he explained as simply a difference in pressure between the upper and lower surface, is in fact the result of a partial vacuum on the upper surface caused by the innability of the air to expand fast enough. Clearly you have just proved this to be the case, as when you blew over the upper surface there was no additional pressure on the lower surface. OK technically there is no such thing as suction, just as is there is no such thing as centrigual force, but the upward force we call lift is greater than the change in momentum of the air beneath the wing. The author is correct that there is no such thing as suction, however he is wrong to suggest that the upward pressure comes from the motion of air under the wing. It comes from the expansive tendancy of air and the fact that air is a gas under pressure. Relieved of the weight of the atmosphere pressing down it will press outwards in all directions including back up under the wing, thus lifting the aircraft. It is worth noting that this effect is due to the compressibility of air, which is why aerofoils work differently to hydrofoils, as water is not compressible. One more thing, try explaining aerodynamic stall without assuming that the majority of lift is due to the shape of the upper surface.
You can't win Darth. If you mod me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine
I wouldn't exactly say the buffet line at a vegas casino is typical america ... think about it if your in really good physical shape are you going to be pigging out at a vegas buffet?
we'll be reading a PhD* dissertation on the physics of flipping hamburgers.
*piled higher and deeper
ObJoke! "I'll bet you guys are excited" said the cabbie as he drove the students to their graduation ceremony. "I know I was when I got my PhD".
try { do() || do_not(); } catch (JediException err) { yoda(err); }
I must patent this, as I've been doing it like that for years. Though my method also involves a webcam, a bowtie and some body lotion.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
And they say art is dead, they obviously haven't seen what concerns physics grads are having to delve into to find something that hasn't be rehashed a million times.
Pancake Algebra
not quite the same, but thoroughly enjoyable !
Francis.
Attitude by working it off(labor/exercise) or using dietary supplements
Respect by this means: you show me you care for me by looking physically attractive to me; so as a bonus to our friendship, other people want to hang with us and are attracted to us in public.
Yell & scream & rant & rave... it's no use... you need a shaaaave ~ Bugs Bunny
Try dropping a pancake (crpe to Yanks) and and a melon at the same time. Which one hit the floor first? Oops. try it in a vacuum next time.
So if you are cooking in a vacuum, the formula applies equally well to pancakes, melons, and thanksgiving turkeys.
If you are cooking at atmospheric pressure, you will have to correct for air resistance (quite significant for a pancake).
I for one LOVE splattered pancakes. They cook up so much crisper on the lower edge. In fact, I've been flipping early for years just to get this effect.
Hey freaks: now you're ju
What is "confectionary sugar"? Please translate in to en_GB for me. Thanks.
(sqrt(pi)*1g)/(d*4)
Where g is the accelleration due to gravity and d is the distance from the elbow to the pancake.
In addition to the rather obvious (or at least intuitive) flaw of not considering the size/mass of the pancake, this formula cannot possibly produce the value claimed. Dimensional analysis shows that it results in an answer measured in terms of radians per second squared, and angular velocity is always measured in just radians per second.
Of course, if they *meant* to say angular accelleration, they should have said so.
File under 'M' for 'Manic ranting'
Okay, I've got my robotic arm with elbow-joint, I've got my frying pan, and I've got my crepe sitting inside. I want to know how much force I should tell the arm to use to flip the thing, but I don't see that in the equation anywhere. Is it implicit somehow in the angular velocity term? Help me build my robotic pancake-flipper!
I'll be very impressed if they invent a machine which can repeatably toss pancakes. There are an awful lot of variables, which he seems to ignore. But then he is a physicist, not an engineer.
The formula as reported by the BBC cannot possibly be correct, since it claims that angular velocity is equal to a quantity that has dimensions of time^{-2}.
icing sugar?
Don't they call that "powdered sugar"?
I know all the digits to pi in binary. But I do admit the same problem - I do get the order mixed up a bit.
Icing sugar.
We used to just put TONS and TONS of regular granualted sugar on the pankace and roll it up.
No wonder I had so many cavities....
If you don't want to repeat the past, stop living in it.
...how you'ld ever use math in everyday life. Oh those crazy Brittish...
not in the uk we don't. ;)
I know that, I'm a Briton. I'm referring to the Americans ;)
Heck, England is where Professor Branestawm (sorry, Amazon doesn't list any of the original books) invented the pancake making machine. As I recall, it went awry and tossed 24-inch pancakes about 30 feet away.
https://app.box.com/WitthoftResume Code: https://github.com/cellocgw
In Soviet Russia, pancake flips YOU!
thanks
--- I am known for the ones who want to find me on the net. Is that a privacy risk or a privilege? One might wonder..
All the cool people are still using miles, at least! Even the British are still using miles per hour! Get a clue, you dumb fucking Canadians!
-ts
But then he is a physicist, not an engineer. ;-)
Assume a cylindrical pancake of uniform density...
- First you make a circular movement [...]
- Then you tilt the end of the pan down slightly
- and make a short, sharp inward movement [...]
- Then you sharply flick the pan up
- so that the pancake goes between one and two feet in the air [...]
Thank you, both for the pointers and an approximation of what they formula should be rearranged to give.
The formula expressed in the article purports to give you the angular velocity of the pancake. Perhaps useful as one step in the process of computing how to build a flipping machine, but NOT the whole story even for a machine design, and definitely not what you need for training a human.
And the formula is clearly wrong, since g shouldn't be in it if you're going for angular velocity - unless you're solving for the angular velocity needed at launch to get the pancake back into the pan (in which case r shouldn't be there). So something in the article's description is wrong (though perhaps the original research was correct).
What I'd like to see is a function giving the target height for the top of the pancake's arc in terms of the radius from pivot point (probably elbow) to the center of the pancake (and possibly also parameters for the mass and diameter of the pancake if air resistance is significant.
It's a lot easier to target a particular height-of-toss than some other control parameter (such as speed), and the height will vary with the individual flipper's arm-plus-pan length.
Since the pancake has to land back in the pan the toss has to be close to straight up, which puts the pan about horizontal at launch. There will be some small inward motion from the air resistance, because the up and down trip have the 'cake at opposite angles to the wind, which might be compensated for by outward motion from sliding on the pan during the angular swing of the launch.
Bantam Dominique roosters crow a four-note song. Once you've heard it as "Happy BIRTHday" you can't NOT hear it that way
Where is physicsgenius?
The Slashdot Effect: A new for
And the formula is clearly wrong, since g shouldn't be in it if you're going for angular velocity - unless you're solving for the angular velocity needed at launch to get the pancake back into the pan (in which case r shouldn't be there).
Oops. I take that back.
g, r and omega should all be there to let you solve for time-of-flight from angular velocity. So rearranging should let us solve first for circumferential velocity, then for flight time, and finally for height-of-throw, giving the formulation I was after.
Bantam Dominique roosters crow a four-note song. Once you've heard it as "Happy BIRTHday" you can't NOT hear it that way
Please, that has already been done. http://www.uwstout.edu/ur/np/2000/feaauto.html
Now getting a robot to play ping-pong (table tennis) is a real challenge. That feat, however, has already been done. See http://www.ifr.mavt.ethz.ch/photo/indrobotics/ as an example. I don't think that's the robot I remember seeing, but it is an example. Combines computer vision and robots. Also, because it is such a huge factor, the algorithms have to take the ball's spin into account.
What is "confectionary sugar"?
Powdered sugar as opposed to granulaged sugar.
About the consistency of flour as opposed to table salt.
Used to make icings and such.
In the US it's called powdered or confectioners sugar.
I guess it depends on your ancestory and region of upbringing.
For instance I eat my grits salty with cheese. A more Southern style then others from the north would eat, they enjoy them with syrup or sugar.
Yet I take my iced tea unsweetened like most northeners, meanwhile southerners like Iced tea to be sweetened to the point of pain.
Southern iced tea is like Thai iced tea but without the milk.
I blame my mother for this.
Is it the English or the French who put milk in hot tea? I ask because I have ancestors from both countrys and I enjoy it from time to time.
Does that make Chai a India thing or was it a British creation using Indian tea?
Well I've wrestled with reality for thirty five years doctor, and I'm happy to say I finally won out over it.
What are grits?
;) An Indian fella once told me they drink their tea hot with milk in India too, even in the middle of their steaming summer - it's supposed to be one of the most refreshing drinks. No sugar is added as that isn't so refreshing, and besides many of us find that revolting too!
The English drink their tea with milk. I think tea with cream is revolting, and many agree
I don't know much about the history of tea, but a summary can be found here. The only thing I know about Chai is that it's the fancy spiced stuff in Indian restaraunts. Oh, and some friends from northern England call ordinary tea "char", which I think is related to the Indian name.
1. Have no life
2. ???
3. First post.
Grits are a corn product.
This link should explain them better then I can. However, it is from the view of southern US cooking.
India and other countries along the more uncomfortable tempriture regions of the world tend to serve more spicy and phisicaly hot foods. They make you sweat, and when you sweat in that climate your body can ditch some heat from the evaporation of the water.
I usually take my hot tea with honey, but I don't usually drink black teas, I drink a lot of herbal mixtures and green teas.
Char is Chinese for tea.
Well I've wrestled with reality for thirty five years doctor, and I'm happy to say I finally won out over it.
1) Hang-time of the pancake:
2)Time for a 180 degree flip:
3)Starting spin condition:
4) I can substitute equation 3 into 2 to get:
5) The pancake radius cancels out!
6)Then, I set the two times equal to eachother, because we are looking for the time to flip to be exactly the hang-time:
7) Solve for angular velocity...
8) The condition at Launch is
9) So, by 7 and 8, (substituting V)..
10) which is the same as
This result is just a clean factor of two off from the article. I'm very suprised that I can put together enough physics to derive something that is apparently so newsworthy!
now someone help me find the mistake!
Raisinettes are my raison d'etre
of British Culinary Physics. In addition to this article, learn:t m
. stm
/ 62724340/ p1/article.jhtml
why a dunked biscuit falls apart in a cup of tea
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/462987.s
(Univ. of Bristol)
why tea dribbles down a teapot's spout
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/227572
(Univ of East Anglia)
and why bubbles rise in a pint of Guiness
http://www.findarticles.com/m1200/19_157
(o.k. the researchers are Aussies, and Guiness is Irish.... both were or are part of the British Commonwealth anyways).
Karma? mostly affected by posting to articles that are almost a day old. Danged time-zones
well, its about time that damn cook learned to do the math right.
Well, if learned your math in school, you wouldnt have to waste 100-200 eggs practicing how to flip eggs now, would you? All you'd have to do is learn that formula and filp it perfect everytime.