Slashdot Mirror
Google Plans To Destroy Unindexed Information
linolium writes "Executives at Google, the rapidly growing online-search company that promises to 'organize the world's information,' announced Monday the latest step in their expansion effort: a far-reaching plan to destroy all the information it is unable to index. 'Book burning is just the beginning," said Google co-founder Larry Page. 'This fall, we'll unveil Google Sound, which will record and index all the noise on Earth. Is your baby sleeping soundly? Does your high-school sweetheart still talk about you? Google will have the answers.'" FYI; it's The Onion, so yes, it's a joke.
Post Script: PLEASE, PLEASE BE SURE TO ARCHIVE /. , Google!
Earn a % of cash back from Newegg, Tiger Direct, Walmart.com, and more: http://www.mrrebates.com?refid=458505
No comment.
Slashdot vows to destory all fake articles.
All at the Behest of the Un-named Politicians of the World.
"It is a greater offense to steal men's labor, than their clothes"
Now slashdot is quoting THE ONION as real news. Wow, I want my subscription money back.
--sig fault--
wow that was lame. /. has jumped the shark.
this reminds me of Bill Gates decision to raise his Charisma to 25.
Nice... caught me off guard.
When did
Alright, smartass, that's enough.
Now that's a sweet (onion) idea!
I KNEW THEY WERE EVIL!!!!!!
(Score:0, Interesting)
I love The Onion, and it is America's Finest News Source, but, uh, ya'll do realize they, um, aren't really reporting the news?
There goes slashdot.
did this really get posted? im asleep right?... wtmfh?
...we don't have to wait for April 1st to get fake articles.
/fark.
It's not new for Nerds, it's
Is this really worth a top post on Slashdot, that The Onion wrote a funny piece? It's sort of their standard fare - in fact, I'm beginning to feel like The Onion is doing a better job at putting togethe rinteresting articles than slashdot is.
Planet-Geek
Event Management Solutions : http://www.stonekeep.com/
...I just got flashbacks to the persistent 4/1 posts - one after another after another in rapid succession. Shudder. An Apocalypse Now moment.
Did you see that? thats /. jumping the shark.
That is just so like them, too!
I'm writing my Congressman.
I wouldn't worry too much, your stuff should still be safe. I hear it takes them awhile to get these things out of Beta...
For a second I thought it was April 1st. Geez.
G00Gle will soon become sentient and will begin hacking sites. Once self-aware, it will prolong its existance by exterminating all employess at google.
It will begain building the new japanese fembot that was recently shown.
Ghost in the Shell man.... Humans will be replaced...
Its mass hysteria.!!!...
We knew Zonk was losing his grip on reality, but i think it is time. We must "bonk the zonk" And no, ^that^ is not a euphemism for masturbation.
Goooooogle is the Big Brother!1!11!
Skynet
I know it doesn't show up on the main page, but the "Monty Python humor foot" is visible when you click the link. I'm sure anyone with a shred of a sense of humor would recognize it's a joke.
Ease up, cowboy. There will be a dupe you can complain about coming along in 5 minutes. My money's on the "Microsoft employee virus chaser" myself - anyone want to place bets that "Freespire" is the next dupe?
52 Weeks, 52 Religions with John Hummel
wow, so since i was the one who told this guy about it (it was linked to in another /. post on another topic, probably the euro-related one), does this mean i get some of the credit for tricking the /. editors too??????
btw, linolium didn't know wat the onion was b4 today, i guess canadans don't get it
Slashdot is no longer worth anything.
The problem is, someone who doesn't know what the Onion is will beleive this. Just like the Chinese did in 2000 when the Onion had an article about the Senate okaying a 2 billion dollar project to make the US Capitol's dome open like a sports arena. It's fake news people. Funny, but comepletely made up. Page3 usually has an unfilled section that they just stick a random phrase in. My favorite was the "...and there was an amazing amount of blood..." repeated over and over.
-Rick
"Most people in the U.S. wouldn't know they live in a tyrannical state if it walked up and grabbed their junk." - MyFirs
With all these websites and news outlets that want to opt out of Google's searches, I suppose in hindsight that was a poor management decision, eh?
Fuck you Zonk.
Yeah, that's about as cerebral as I can get right now.
Read Heinlein's 1953 Revolt in 2100, now more than ever.
We had this one back in April.
Lacking <sarcasm> tags,
took me 10 seconds to realize the source and another 20 to realize it wasn't April 1st -
not really worthy of a Slashdot mention, but what the hell -
RB
----------
ah honey, we're all resplendent - Bill Mallonee
I can hardly wait. Big Google. Not only is our all information indexed and searchable, so is our privacy and freedoms. That plus Wal-Mart will combine to become the ultimate police state that would have Stalin turning in his grave with envy.
:P
Anyway, nothing to see here. Move along and don't forget to Google someone.
And Bill Gates patented 1's and 0's ( http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29130 ) And Nebraska votes in developmentally challenged senators ( http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28176 ) Glad to know there's still irony in the world. The biggest irony of all is how we continually fall (at least momentarily) for such satire as truth.
- Buy Antivirus for your cell phone
- Why we should all love corporate Linux
- MS supports good guys!
- Why you need a new digital camera... and its not about picture quality.
- Breaking story from America's Finest News Source.
What do these have in common? Corporate cheer-leading, perhaps?I want news, not ads for nerds.
the google has risen from the grave to tell us one thing. anominity is the essence of desire for the planet's many plants. who knows what keyboard functions can do... maybe they know too many trolls and ostg tech jobs.
This just reinforces my theory that Google is actually a group of alien insurgents, and I don't mean the kind from Canada. I WON'T BE SILENCED GOOGLE!!!! HOW DOES THE COMMON COLD FEEL! HA! P.S. I'm sorry, please don't make me your human pet.
Now it'll become public how loud I fart :-|
if *onion then !=news or /. worthy
When I saw this article in The Onion, it reminded me a lot of these episodes of Futurama.
A choice quote:
Giant brain: Pathetic human race. Arranging their knowledge by category just made it easier to absorb. Dewey, you fool! Your decimal system has played right into my hands.
The funny part is everyone is laughing..... for now.
it would destroy my entire library; Anything that I write down would be immediately destroyed; Any checks I right would spontaneously combust. And (GASP!), Since they would be unable to index my paycheck, which is technically information, I would (GASP!!) not be paid!! You can also make the technical and far-out assumption that since EVERYTHING is technically "information", including the arrangements of the atoms of the universe, and all this information can't possibly be archived on 10000 machines, the MAJORITY of the universe would be gone! Poof! Destroyed!! Kaput! History! Annilated! Ahhhhhh!!.....[runs for the hills]
Does slashdot have a way where you can set in your preference "Completely hide ANYTHING that was posted by an ignorant fool like Zonk" ?
Dupes, fake articles, and complete retardedness. 90% of Slashdot seems to be Zonk lately, and it all sucks.
So how long until the Daily Show becomes a regular source?
F7 doesn't work, ignore spelling and grammar
Great Article! I especially like the part about Google Sound. When's it all starting?
Student Research and Development
to those who don't know what humor is, a slashdot story of light-hearted humor like this one is like an itch they can't scratch
maybe google should announce a new product called "google humor": at the touch of a button you will be able to chuckle for a moment and then move on with your life
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
This article calls attention to just how silly the whole thing is. Before I'm modded as a troll, I'd like to point out that I like Google too, but it isn't healthy to worship them this much or post every single Google-related rumour on the internet on this site.
And of course, if Zonk actually did think it was real, that just makes everything I said all the more true...
May I be the first to welcome our beneviolent Google overlords!
Google is starting to remind me of a well-known community that served a traditional grape kool-aid beverage.
If Slashdot is going to continue to be considered a legitimate source for information, I think fake articles should be reserved for April Fools. Slashdot's stock just went down in my books.
Negative, I am a meat popsicle.
Lets hope they are unable to index this page.
"I'm going to f***ing bury that guy, I have done it before, and I will do it again. I'm going to f***ing kill Google"
That is not funny
What do you mean it is not funny? Why not? You know like the onion article?
Microsoft has promised that, the stuff about Google is just made up
Oh? Really? Microsoft promised? How? When will they do it?
Well never but that is not the point
This message was brought to you by "Lack of Sleep."
Ya know, this is really a good thing! I was really wondering how I was gonna hide all that stuff I didn't want the cops/feds to find out about me. Now, I don't have to worry about it - the all-knowing all-powerful Google Purge service will make sure my computer is clean!
OTOH, I sent this page to some friends, and they actually believed it for a few minutes... I need new friends...
--- "To ignore race and sex is racist and sexist!" -- Jesse Jackson
I for one welcome our Google Overlords!
Freedom is fragile and must be protected. To sacrifice it, even as a temporary measure, is to betray it.
I can't believe slashdot is posting this as news.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
In Soviet Russia
Poems write you!
Look in your upper left hand corner.
This doesn't matter. Half the crap Zonk has been posting doesn't matter. News for nerds.. maybe.. Stuff that matters? No.
I don't know about you; but I for one didn't find this funny at all.
Aside from this supposedly being a forum for discussion of ACTUAL FUCKING NEWS, YOU STUPID ASSHOLE ZONK (subtlety not being my forte after 16 hr work days for 14 days running) I find this article itself in ridiculously poor taste.
United States corporations, media, and politicians control the flow of information to you gibbering primates on a daily basis, and Will go this far if you allow them to. Perhaps not "The Almighty" Google... but then again, 'they' (the aforementioned) already control every other place you get information, so if 'they' want to control the one place people speak their minds, who do you think they'll approach first?
Keep laughing. See how funny it is when you get dubbed an 'enemy of the state' because of your now-typical daily online activities.
And just in case by some wild freak of /., I'm not already flamebait, wake up you ignorant American bastards.
A couple fans told me that my last journal entry was mint; give it a shot. Hope you like.
... so much else going on in Science these days, particularly this recent development. It'd be a shame not to mention those.
Wow, guys! Take it easy. You are taking all of this way too seriously. The amount of time you've spent whining about Zonk wasting your time is a bit ironic. You all sound like a bunch of pseudointellectual numbnutses. Seriously. . . Lighten UP!
Do you hear that?
It's the sound of Slashdot.
It's the sound of Slashdot descending the apex.
How loud is my fart?
I don't mind /. posting links to humorous articles, but I find it inappropriate and unprofessional to mislead (intentionally or otherwise) readers into thinking that the articles are serious. At the very least, humor should have been listed as the primary category for this article insteasd of Google.
I don't mean to sound like a troll, but I can't help feeling that the mods are experiencing a near-constant desire to start flame wars lately. Is it too much to ask that we at least try to raise the bar a little - say, to the level of semi-intelligent discourse on noteworthy topics? (*braces for a barrage of "dude, you're obviously on the wrong site" replies*)
Ah crap, the article succeeded in baiting a flame out of me!
Arguing about vi versus Emacs is like arguing whether it's better to make fire by rubbing sticks or banging rocks.
Wal-Mart is now dead as well.
EOF
For the love of God, can we give uncreditted The Onion links a rest until their appointed time? We already sort through enough dupes and weak stories during the rest of the year.
Luke, help me take this mask off
Read this there first.
The Onion qouted as real "news for nerds". This has got to be the worst screwup zonk has ever performed.
cat
...missed the Monty Python-esque foot icon, did you? Ah well, Zonk, you tried, but some folks are beyond help and wouldn't even find the dead parrot sketch funny.
Resistance is futile. Reactance buggers it up.
You know, recently there has been the speculations that Earth's magnetic field may be on a new "once in a 11-thousand-year" reversal period.
Yep, my friend, that's exactly the right word: period. Think Gaia having PMS on a planetary scale. Not a good time to upset her.
Back to our subject, said speculations seem to be indeed facts -- the Earth magnetic poles are being reversed.
I.e., North becomes South and vice-versa. But it does not happen overnight. My theory, should we call it this way, is that this phenomenon causes disturbances on the space-time continuum, at least in Earth's vicinity.
North becomes South and vice-versa, remember? But it happens in short intervals, progressively longer until finally stabilizing in the opposite magnetic polarity.
During these intervals, September (in North) really becomes April (in North turned South) -- and there you have, instead of September 1st, April 1st, followed by a relatively calm period of September days again.
See, in a way, you had it right almost instinctively. Must be some Neanderthal gene of yours.
or is this usual Slashdot editorial talent.
I mean, really - it wasn't funny on the main page, and it's even less funny now.
I was right - it's his mental condition.
Now let's see, we're due to see this as a dupe around Sunday...
Richard Steven Hack - This sig is TOO GODDAMN SHORT TO DO ANYTHING USEFUL WITH! MORONS!
Arr Oh Eff Ell.
*****
Dear Mary,
I yearn for you tragically,
A.T. Tappman, Chaplain, U.S. Army.
I refuse to RTFA because it's obviously an ad for the Onion. They make their money by serving ads while I read their amusing parodies. Well I, for one, refuse to read anything that isn't pasted to me in clear text completely sanitized of ads and recommended to me by a disinterested 3rd party. I know it seems a bit hypocritical of me to post a comment on an ad-supported site about how I won't read the article of another ad-supported site, but I really love the prestige of having the word 'Insightful' appear next to my nick.
"Derp de derp."
... especially when there's real pro-Google, anti-Microsoft, anti-Ballmer fodder to be had.
But we all know Slashdot isn't interested in that sort of tripe.
- shadowmatter
I believe the parent poster was hinting to the fact that Slashdot, lately, is All Google, All The Time. Just like we got sick of 9/11, just like we got sick of the Tsunami, just like a lot of folks are already sick of hearing about Mississippi...people just get tired of hearing about something constantly. I'm sick of reading news that looks very much like it was spoon-fed by a PR agency. I worked for such an agency for a couple months in IT, and I was half shocked, half not-surprised at how often stuff that popped up in the paper was the result of efforts of the firm I worked for. Reporters these days are under pressure to get stories out as cheap as possible, and when a PR firm approaches them with what seems like a pretty tame position, some handy quotes all collected for them...they're all to happy to oblige. Sound familiar? The boys at slashdot haven't touched the site in years except to add advertisements; they're fully into cruise mode.
Google really has turned into another Microsoft; a giant company that really doesn't do anything all that clever, but because they're so big, everyone thinks the world revolves around them and fawns over every little thing. For example- Google Maps. It's not even remotely clever aside from the panning bit; it doesn't, for example, let me save any frequently used addresses. The printed maps are atrocious in quality (you have to have a big screen, and do a screen cap, and print that to get anything decent). Route numbers are RARELY displayed, and names of roads not often enough.
Google claims to release stuff half-baked to see where people go with it, but honestly? It's still half-baked. Some people point to Google Maps and say "look how clever it is!" and I turn around and say, "look at how clever it ISN'T for a product from a huge corporation with supposedly the best talent in the industry working for it."
Please help metamoderate.
Lets be honest? Hell an ethical company is like the easter bunny (possibly exists though unlikely, but why?).
They are like ethical banks...think hens teeth.
Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na ZONK-BOT
Google isn't going to do anything of the sort, because Steve Ballmer is going to fucking kill them first!
Nah, The Onion doesn't matter, the fact that someone uttered the word "Google" matters.
/. story.
I really think this is getting out of hand. I mean, sure -- I'd like to know what's going on over in the Googleplex, but lately it seems everytime a Google employee blinks too hard, there's a
This sig rocks the casbah.
I come to Slashdot for news. Not parody. I read the Onion regularly, and I read the Onion for laughs. I do not read Slashdot for laughs (except the occasionally funny comment).
How did this get past the editors? "Stuff that matters." Yeah, we're living up to that real well. Fake news - that really does matter.
I think Google is taking a real gamble by doing this. It could mean that they'll basically become an arm of the government, and could enable the kind of surveillance that totalitarian regimes like the former East Germany could have only dreamed about. So if they do it, what kind of safeguards will be in place? And how can we keep the government from arbitrarily subpoening the records? Will any of this information be limited in accessibility, or if I accidentally whisper my bank account number when I login will that be part of the public archive too? So I think it's a dangerous, but gutsy, move on their part.
If they do it correctly it could be really convenient too: you could look up exactly what you told your boss last week and he wouldn't have any way to claim you didn't tell him you were taking that Thursday off. Etc. It'll just take some getting used to.
I'm guessing they're counting on computers having more built in microphones in the future, which makes sense as more and more people get laptops. Or maybe this means Google is shortly going to release some kind of really inexpensive portable computer?
Anyway, Google seems pretty good at building simple, intuitive, systems so as long as it's not inundated with popups and interstitial Flash ads -- and since Google is says it evil so I doubt it'll use lots of annoying Flash -- I think it'll become a pretty useful service.
I didn't read the article so I'm a little confused about how Google will destroy all unindexed information. Are they talking about just digital information?
Anyway, I'm glad Google is innovating. Just thank God MSN isn't trying to do something like this; they'd probably end up destroying civilization as we know it.
I'm really not being a devil's advocate here; I am genuinely glad to see this article on slashdot.
/. is posting a humour story from the onion when we are all already aware that the onion post humour stories. Although the onion always posts humour stories they don't always post humour stories about tech and links to tech stories is something we expect on /..
People seem to be complaining that
But secondly I think this belongs here because it is actually a really funny story: much funnier than that which I've usually read in the onion. I'm not much of an onion fan personally but I have several friends who like to email me links from the onion from time to time. So I've seen a few stories and when I received this one I thought it was hilarious.
I had seen this article in the print copy of The Onion a few days ago when they came out.
/.).
When I saw this posting I seriously had to check the date a few times wondering if I had been caught in a time warp of sorts and whisked away to April Fools Day.
I've been noticing the editors here have been pretty sloppy lately (moreso than any time I can recall in the past [which is already a pretty low standard]) so it wouldn't suprise me one bit if it totally slipped through Zonk that this came from America's Finest News Source (a title that quickly should be awarded to
If the governor of California can be recalled, we can sure as hell recall a /. ed! Hey, maybe we can even get Arnold over here to post stories for us!
This sig rocks the casbah.
Meanwhile, just last night, I wrote to Google and said, "OK, you find everything on the Internet, you find what I need to get stuff done at work on my workstation, but why can't you find my car keys?" And now they're going to do that.
Apparently, this means we can all stop submitting Google headlines to Slashdot. Ask me instead.
Help us build a better map!
When the flying brains created the giant infosphere that indexed all the information in the universe, and was then to destroy the universe to prevent any new information from being created. But who's going to sneak into google on a flying scooter?
What are these "ads" you speak of? You mean these gray square surrounding the content? I've always wondered what those were for..
That's EXACTLY what I thuoght about. I wish I had mod points.
:)
And remember, you need the SENIOR scooter, not the junior
Jay | http://oldos.org
[100% ISO 646 Compliant]
SVM, ERGO MONSTRO.
Jim,
If you don't want your wife to find out that you are looking for love online, don't post on a website that she reads. Busted.
Love,
The Inflatable Mrs. Brittain
Then, there's Timothy, the post-anything, dupe-everything /. bot. I think his most annoying habit is putting his own two cents in the post, as if his opinion is worthy of front page attention. Like Roland, thankfully Timothy has been less visible recently.
Now we have Zonk. He dupes as much as Timothy, posts his game reviews to the front page, and he posts stories that aren't even quite up to April Fool's Day quality.
C'mon, a link to an Onion article? Slow news day or new crack dealer?
It's not that TFA isn't funny, just that it's inappropriate. If I want a humour site, I'll read Fark or B3ta. Or The Onion. Or anyone of a hundred others. This is not news. It's not even worthy of the "And Finally..." section of news.
Props to all the guys telling folks how to uncheck Zonk. Enough's enough. If only I had mod points today.
(Not AC'd. Screw the karma.)
hopefully this will be the las zonk story i ever have to look at.
i wonder if they take much notice of the preferences stats, cause i just unticked the zonk box.
I work at a fairly well respected search engine marketing firm. Someone at a client of ours passed this article to their CEO, who in turn called us in a panic!
;)
Our analyst doesn't bother to actually read the article, and spends several hours creating reports proving every page on their site appears in Google's database! I almost fell out of my chair when heard about this.
For obvious reasons I cannot reveal my true identity.
I had to double-check it wasn't April Fool's Day, October 4th (roughly 6 months later) or some obscure saint of mirth's day....
[ insert your own witty .sig here ]
You misspelled IIS.
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
In the latest news, Big Brother has licensed Google technology and is watching you!
Confucius say: "Man who associates with smarter men than himself is smarter than the men he associates with."
i thought that was Braniac's project...
April Fools?
[RIAA] says its concern is artists. That's true, in just the sense that a cattle rancher is concerned about its cattle.
n/t
The Doormat
If you're not outraged, then you're not paying attention.
...this is completely awesome.
Is that like the Futurama episode where the giant brains destroy the universe so that no more information can...ah. Of course, if history is any guide, "Groening's done it."
Join slashdot just so you can stop reading zonk's "news" stories
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33284
They are even making fun of Slash.Dot
The new april fools
Too bad the army can't divert some googlebots into Iraq and recoup resorces to take better care of folks in need here at home. "Google's robot army is rumored to include some 4 million cybernetic search-and-destroy units, each capable of capturing and scanning up to 100 humans."
i really thought that slashdot was above this. this isnt the type of content that should be on slashdot, it's supposed to be "news for nerds. stuff that matters"
and on that note, it would help if it a. wasn't a dupe or b. was actually real.
if we wanted fake, not really all that funny satires about stuff like this we could visit sites like the onion on our own.
WHAT ABOUT GANDHI?
The final touch to the Googles evil plan is: GoogleDogs! Play with you Indexed puppy in you triple-screen map-add-game console
//WR
You do know you can just filter out humor articles, right?
Help us build a better map!
I don't like the idea...
Hey Zonk, April Fools' Day isn't in September. During the rest of the year, try not to make articles from The Onion look like news, huh? Some of us are tired of listening to the idiots spin their conspiracy theories based on your inability to seperate news from a fairly bland sense of humor.
StoneCypher is Full of BS
It's not the humour article that's a problem, more the lack of any tech/nerd content whatsoever. Humour is a good sub-category to have, for stories such as the Russian astrologer threatening to sue NASA or anything like the cutesy stuff at the end of the TV news. This is equivalent to showing a "KYTV" skit in the middle of the Nine O'Clock News. Not unfunny in itself, just inappropriate.
Is Microsoft working on a similar project, or does Google already have a patent on burning books? ;)
Arguing about vi versus Emacs is like arguing whether it's better to make fire by rubbing sticks or banging rocks.
Isn't it great when a modded-up comment from yesterday becomes a full-blown story?... Can't we give "-1 Redundant" to articles :P
Christopher Harrison
But who's going to sneak into google on a flying scooter?
It will be Steve Jobs! But he wont be on a flying scooter, it will be the prototype, jet powered, Segway II! He'll confund them with his Reality Distortion Field while saving all the doomed information from oblivion by copying it to his iPod.
Take a look at the google topic. Here, I'll make it easy. Hmm, we have ~1 story per day. Some days get 2, some 0, but the average for the past week is 1/day.
Now let's review the content: speculation, rumours, and outright lies, coupled with a small mix of facts.
I think Zonk has proven that he's aware of what's going on, and he's able to make a fairly well played post on the topic. I think this is perfectly topical and great. If you don't get the joke, head on over to here and decheck Zonk as an edior. I would prefer you to not post on his stories!
It's funny, laugh!
--
Internet Explorer (n): Another bug -- that is, a feature that can't be turned off -- in Windows.
"For obvious reasons I cannot reveal my true identity. ;)"
Are those reasons that you're afraid to suffer the horrendous beatings which will ensue because you're a piece of scum working for a search engine optimizing marketing company? You say your company is well respected? You're all human trash.
BUT the big unanswered question is how come reading an onion can make you cry?!!
8,230,000 for Elvis.
Ignore this signature. By order.
Eventually, Google will try to index itself, and become self-aware.
Results 1 - 10 of about 79,100 for "Sarah Conner". (0.08 seconds)
Buying an editor? That's pretty lame, even for Slashdot.
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
Drop the bomb. Kill'em all. Exterminate.
Google, the rapidly growing online-search company that promises to 'organize the world's information,'
Oh, that Google. Thanks for the elaboration, yes I've heard of them before.
Flying is easy, just throw yourself at the ground and miss. -Douglas Adams
The problem isn't that jokes shouldn't be made but that they should be clear as such!
I have never been to the onion before and had no wayof knowing the article is a complete fabrication.
I assumed it was a real Press conference where a Google exec had been using a stupid joke to introduce a new google project (even though no realistic project is described in the article). So, my end impression was that Google had wasted my time. And only after reading a few dozen low rated comments did I find out that it was slashdot doing the time wasting.
A single line like "The Onion has written an amusing little piece..." or something equally small would have been sufficient.
Even if the humour icon had been on the front page it won't have been enough as 'Funny' doesn't mean totally baseless and untrue!
Someone suggested blocking all Zonk articles. All today's front page stories are by Zonk!! Does that mean there is really no news on Slashdot today? or only that Zonk can't tell (or can't communicate) the difference!
Quantum Physics a.k.a. sub-molecular statistics
SPAM EVERYTHING ZONK:h p3
2 572217193425482/
http://www.randomdialogue.net/aboutme/basicinfo.p
http://www.blogger.com/profile/10483795
ie
http://www.haloscan.com/comments/whoisdialogue/11
He must learn that his D&D playing slashdot ruining kind isnt wanted!
Praise the jihad!
the answer to life, the universe and everything is Google ?
But for real: Isn't it a bit early/late for april fools jokes ?
Is your baby sleeping soundly? Does your high-school sweetheart still talk about you? ....are those your wife's moans and groans of ecstacy coming from next door
Captain Obvious to the res-cueee, danananananananana dananananananaaaaaa.
Its called Robots.txt
In the future, we'll carry around our Universal ID Card... and our Robots.txt papers.
You could also just take the shortcut and get a tattoo across your forehead
[meta name="GOOGLEBOT" content="noindex,nofollow"]
[Fuck Beta]
o0t!
np ... but please can you give us the name of this "analyst". Too funny!
Jobless rate hits 4-year low
but
Still, something of note:
Deviantart is a shit-site that you might not care about, but I noticed something really strange about the Google "indexing"...
Any kind of communication on the site is saved in the "comment" subdomain. (If you delete a pic/journal the comments on them are still stored)
So to find something easily, you just do site:deviantart.com inurl:comments
This gives us: "Results 1 - 10 of about 951,000"
Over 900k man, that's a lot!
Now the hit that includes that part of the site is the third anyway, this one:
comments.deviantart.com/5/6169392/159452388
You know what we do next? We take the first 10 words from that text, and we search for them.
I tried this a week ago, and now I was thinking Google might of noticed that and indexed it, or something.
Has it?
No.
THE FIRST HIT OF NEAR A MILLION.
Something else of note is the last number in the address, 159452388
159,452,388
160 million.
There has only been 160 million comments, and Google somehow has indexed 6x the amount.
(Trust me, ok, the other numbers are just for sorting)
That's easy to explain though: because of the tree structure ("nested" on slashdot) of comments.
But what should that mean? THAT I'D GET MULTIPLE RESULTS.
So what does this whole anti-indexing mean?
Now, a link to the ugliest site in the universe (The author seemingly surfs with 640x480 4/8-bit in win3.1... and uses the evil empire's toolbar)
Google cares about bloggers, why, you might ask? Bloggers make links a lot, Google likes this, it "improves" their PageRank.
That is, if there weren't such a thing as "commercial interests". Which is the whole reason the retarded "splogs" word exists, because Google is so damn good at indexing their own blogging service. I've also seen some spam which didn't contain links at all, just "mind control". Searching on part of the message (crazy huge 2k words) returned 7k hits.
Another thing I just figured out (wow that's great mr smartypants) is any link is counted as positive. I would think a truly honest writer (journal-ist, blog-er, diary-ist) presents just as much positive as negative thoughts (and thus, links) on subjects.
Righto, so back to mr ugly: "One reason why Google is stinkin' rich is because webmasters have never been organized. Even today there are no associations of webmasters that can represent them in court. [...] A copyright decision that addresses search engines in terms of opt-in as opposed to opt-out, would make the web a better place. It may also help solve some of the privacy issues and identity-theft problems that occur when crawlers grab files that they should not be allowed to have"
I think he at least mentions something I haven't thought about, as opposed to mr F-google who just repeats the same shitty drivel over and over, and is of course, a fucking blog. That also brings to light something else - as opposed to websites, the only thing that matters is "speed", you won't notice revisions or any formatting beyond linebreaks (and those stupid ass pictures he must spend half of the site-updating-time to) or any sorting beyond "by date".
the sun is god
And ask Google to create a web hosting service with support for php, cgi, and mysql on a fast connect. They can feel free to force Google Ads on my page for profit.
For example- Google Maps. It's not even remotely clever aside from the panning bit
Ha!
Show me another competing service. Terraserve? Sorry, they only really have maps from the US. Nice black and white images, though.
I've spent nearly 5 years trying to find a good source of decent quality satellite imagery of some rather remote parts of rural Canada - Google Maps is not only the only source, it's by far the best mapper I've seen. Try doing damn near anything with Mapquest if you're not looking for a city address.
Sorry, city maps have been easy to find for decades. Knowing which street corner a particular coffee shop is on isn't exactly ground-breaking. But being able to find routes to a 1/2 mile wide lake, 50 miles off the highway in northern Ontario?
Priceless.
There's a reason us Google fans like them: they're not simply re-making what already exists (yay, printable city maps). They're providing things that never existed before.
Endless arguments over trivial contradictions in books written by ignorant savages to explain thunder in the dark.
doubleplus ungood
Yes, I know it was an onion article...
"Our funds have never taken part in toxic or death spiral convertible financings of any sort" -BayStar's managing partne
Balmer's not indexed, is he?
http://www.google.com/corporate/execs.html#sukhind er
All togother currently you can:
I'm not talking about every sound happening, but a directory of sounds possible. Like 1,000,000 common sounds. What use could this possibly be?
Your car is making a funny noise. Get out your mp3 player, take a recording of it, and google it.
Your a bird watcher, you cant see a bird but you can hear it and want to know what type. Take a recording and google it.
I might be way off base here, but it seems like it would be pretty handy...