Slashdot Mirror
Will Your CD Player Tell on You?
An anonymous reader writes "Ever feel like not being a marketing statistic? Well just by playing certain store-bought compact discs in your home or office computer, your new music disc may be transmitting your listening habits in real time to the respective record company...." Charming. Read on for more...
Anonymous Continues: "A company by the name of Bandlink is providing technology to record companies that allows a cd played in a personal computer to contact their server and relate statistics such as what track you're listening to and when you're listening to them. This information is then compiled into customizable reports that allow the record company to develop "User Profiles". There are benefits listed for the consumer such as cd-specific chatrooms, concert information, etc but the question remains: What's your price for privacy? The only indication that the cd you're purchasing is Bandlink "enabled/disabled" is a small logo on the packaging. There is no mention of a opt in/opt out agreement when the cd is inserted on the website and none was displayed in a personal demonstration.
Favorite quote from their website: "Virtually any information you want to know about your fan or the quality of your release can be obtained.""
Hey, this is hardly music. Change the CAT to YRO!!!!
What sort of idiot has their firewall configured to let their CD player send packets out?
In Soviet Russia, YOU spy on MUSIC INDUSTRY!
The theory of relativity doesn't work right in Arkansas.
You know what? I think the law should start considering my computer desktop and my network connection as my personal property. Want to display a popup on my desktop? Sure, $5 a time. Want to send some bits on my behalf? Sure, $1 million a time. If you try and steal advertising space on my desktop, or steal some of the bits that I own, then you go to jail.
...from all those players (including WinAmp) that analyze your CD and download the songlist for you? And this applies to 99% of retail CDs, not only those that are enabled by this technology.
"What sort of idiot has their firewall configured to let their CD player send packets out?"
People who don't read Slashdot.
this may not be all bad.. "Virtually any information you want to know about your fan or the quality of your release can be obtained." maybe they'll finally realize that everyone knows that the quality of their releases is mostly TERRIBLE... and that most people buy cd's for more than 1 song... this may actually lead to entire CD's being quality once again...
So does this info go to the DOD to see if you're a terrorist? God help me if they know that I like Avril Lavigne!
I use Tiny Personal Firewall 2.0 to stop this sort of crap under Windows. It'll block any application from 'reporting' back home via the internet. It's a pro at keeping apps like Real Player or guys like this from tattling. It's not open source, but the 2.0 version was freeware. I'm not sure about the 4.0 version.
I strongly suspect that this won't even be an issue for most Linux users.
The next Slashdot story will be ready soon, but subscribers can beat the rush and slashdot the links early!
Buy a Mac? Use Linux?
:)
Uh... disable autoplay? Come on, not tricky, this one.
Is this USA only, or are these for sale in Canada or in Europe? Because if they are, Canada's PIPEDA and the EU DPD mean wake up and smell the lawsuits.
MHO. YMMV. Any resemblance between this post and real persons, or reality in general, was accidental.
Seal the device in several layers of shielding metals. No data's getting out then. And nobody's going to steal your new, portable, 500lb cd player.
Karma: Excellent^(-t/Tau), Tau=Wittiness/Trollishness
Maybe the record companies will finally realize that there's more to music than the crap they force feed us, courtesy of radio, and MTV! :P
Who knows, they might actually TRY to sign people with talent! LOL!
Join the TWIT army now!
to me, anyway; I gave up on the pre-recorded music somewhere back in the late 1980's. But I have to wonder what would iptables do with this? That could be, er, *interesting*
C|N>K
Does it transmit data when you rip a CD?
Or better yet. Use Linux which doesn't understand autoplay 'features'. Personally, CDs stay in my PC just long enough to turn into MP3s. The CD is then retired to a dusty bookshelf.
Bandlink Support
Bandlink is designed to be run simply by inserting the CD into a Windows Compatible PC. The first time you insert the CD you will need to agree to the Bandlink User License and download the remaining program files. Bandlink should do the rest from then on.
As you can see, there's a consumer agreement component here. It's not an unimpeded, unstoppable invasion of privacy, like what TiVO was doing. You have to agree as well. In which case, if you don't really care about your privacy (and you like push content, which some people do) it might actually be seen as pretty cool.
Statistically speaking, there's a 99.998% chance that my IQ is higher than yours. Get over it.
The obvious possibility is information on copying being reported. I can see it now... "Customer A burnt 6 copies and ripped to MP3." And one assumes a burnt copy will also report back to the data leaches...
I can't wait to get this technology with a "copy-protected" cd that won't play in computers. Unless they would do it to try to get information from the people who break the copy protection by using a sharpie...
I think my principles are reachin' an all time low
Can't you just disable "auto-run" for audio CDs in Windows? But I guess most average users don't know or care enough to do that. Ohh well, why do you need privacy anyways, unless you've got something to hide, you criminal :)
Disconnect your computer from the 'net (this CAN be done you know) then rip the CD, and play the MP3's. Now, that wasnt hard was it?
...if it can make your CD 'phone home' when playing it in a regular CD player (as mentioned in the article) that's not 'net connected!
In any case, this is seriously scary. While I don't think most Slashdotites (being technically literate) will be affected, think of your mom, little sister or brother (if any), peers at school (if any) - all those people who click "OK" mindlessly whenever a dialog box pops up. It's THOSE people that this kind of stuff targets - because those people don't know better. The only way to stop it is to TELL THEM ABOUT IT. Get the word out. Post flyers. Put it in your sig. Whenever you fix someone's computer, tell them about the new 'spy' CDs while you're digging around inside their case or (more likely) plugging in their eithernet cable.
I'm sure someone will come up with an anti-spy software for this soon, so give out as many copies (assuming the antispy software is freeware) as you can.
Look how well it worked for CD copy protection, at least for the first wave. We can do this.
This
Lets get as many /. readers as possible to coordinate a time to play the exact same track and see if we can crash the server with information overload. Better yet, someone figure out exactly what packets are sent so we can duplicate it without buying the CD and just continuously send worthless information to the servers so they give up.
With CD copy protection preventing people from listening to cds on their PCs, this shouldn't be a problem.
That would be incredibly easy to block, though. Aside from those of us not running Windows, all you would have to do is shut off any auto-execution features.
I doubt it will take long for a freeware program to emerge that disables this.
The fundamental principle underlying current privacy practices in the United States is: "It is perfectly acceptable for a company to violate your privacy so long as it is for the purpose of selling you things."
Obviously companies believe this, and on present evidence I'd say that most consumers believe this, too.
"How to Do Nothing," kids activities, back in print!
You would think that if they use slashdot in order to find software and techniques that crack their attempts at 'protecting investments,' that by now they would understand that 'user profiling' is not generally liked or condoned by informed users.. in my humble opinion the modern day equivalent of 'racial profiling'.. the initsself modern term for a commonly rampant tendency for humans to generalize and profit of those generalization and the fears that follow. In this case, push technology is their answer to piracy finance losses. When I say loss I say it loosely and in a 'predicted forecasted maybe finacial gains report' kinda way. So, Why can't they get a grip and let customers come to them (with their supposedly superior product)? Why must they collect info on already paying customers when its been written as a disliked idea in popular science fiction (and general fiction/ some nonfiction) forever?
I give up.. I'll never rant again
HEY IN ANYONE HERE IS THINKING OF STARTING A COMPANY..
respect privacy..
nevermind.. I'm wasting my breathe.
pm
** "It's not my job to stand between the people talking to me, and the ones listening to me." -- Pego the Jerk
There are few technical details on their web site, but it appears to just be a mixed mode (data and audio) CD, which when played using Bandlink's CD player software, will give the "benefits" described. Since I don't have any intention of using their software, it's not a problem. Until, of course, people start producing music that can only be played with their player. So far, record companies haven't been brave enough to test such a tactic in the market, although with copy protected CDs, they're getting awfully close to the line. The depressing thing is, I suspect the general public would just meekly go along with it :-(
"The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike." -- Delos B. McKown
Wow. How did this line of thinking go?
RIAA Exec #1: "Let's start spying on people. It's not like they have a real reason to steal music anyways."
RIAA Exec #2:"Yeah! And we can have pop-ups that tell them Big Brother is watching!"
RIAA Exec #1:"No... That would be stupid... right?"
RIAA Exec #2:"Perhaps... But surely this will make people want to buy music as opposed to downloading it. Right? Right?"
RIAA Exec #1:"..."
RIAA Exec #2:"RIGHT?!"
RIAA Exec #1:"Oops..."
Me: "Thanks guys. Now I have a morally sound reason to download Britney's newest album! MERRY CHRISTMAS!"
new alias for off-topic posts creates a "Jumbie"
Quit Slashdot Today!
Aren't CDs supposed to be replaced by SACD
and/or DVD Audio by now? If there's no way to
avoid copy protections and stuff like this, why
not buy a format that has better quality, and a protection that is not just some add-on that might even affect the sound?
Let's push the technology forward by buying
high-quality SACD/DVD-Audio, and leave all these
crappy (made so by the record companies) CDs behind.
Just a thought...
At home, my Windows box has no access to Internet (except for Mozilla): the firewall is setup not to let any packet from this particular IP address go through :o)
Mozilla may establish HTTP connections using the proxy.
I'd like to see how these smart guys cope with this situation...
But perhaps, I'm not exactly the kind of person they are looking for...
It is times like this I am glad I don't run a mainstream OS. First viruses, now spyCDware
So it's nothing more than some Auto-Run software. Which makes sense, I can't imagine any other way a CD would just magically contact a remote host.
Solution? Disable auto-run (which I do anyway), or in this particular case, don't accept the license agreement...
They also mention this a lot:
My first thought was that they could easily combine so-called "copy protection" with phoning-home, but at least with Bandlink this is not the case.
NGWave - Fast Sound Editor for Windows
duh!
CD Player listens to you!
(At least people in Soviet Russia can grin on this)
Every time you use a credit card, grocery store discount card, write a check they put through a reader, login to something, and so on and so you're are being profiled. I used to work for the second largest ISP, and everything you connected all your connection attempts and other info was beening uploaded during the connection. Many of the major corporation now run software that monitors your calls, and internet activity. We are being monitored, counted, tracked, profiled, and categoried so much does it even matter. All this is just business, if get into all the tracking the goverment does, and you'll really feel like a specimen under a microscope.
Actually in many way I feel there is safety in numbers. If they were only monitoring a we few people I would be nervous, but when the amount of data being collected we are people just numbers in a statisitc somewhere. Just another brick in the wall.
Although I use the free ZoneAlarm.. I'm also pretty restrictive about what programs I allow access, i.e. why oh bloody why does WMP require internet access when playing a media file when all the required codecs are installed (pile of crap it is).
But, the cynic in me keeps shouting out this idea... what is to stop the disc (well apart from disabling autoplay, unless MS has some other "backdoor" auto execution of something on new media) from opening up a browser window with a heavily customised piece of url every now and then? The default access permissions will allow any web browser to do it's stuff?
Just food for thought.
Are you local? There's nothing for you here!
When I used to use windoze, I used ZoneAlarm. It is also freeware. Just look for it on CNet. It had a handy feature of being able to run in the windoze 98 equivlant of an applet in a panel. (You'll see when you download) It allowed you to block ports and restrict which programs wanted access.
I also used Tine Personal Firewall, but found ZoneAlarm more convenient.
Can someone with one of these CD's report the addresses they try to write to, and we add a map to 127.0.0.0 in the HOSTS file? That works with all kinds of spyware (e.g., doubleclick, redsherriff).
Better yet, can someone distribute a universal HOSTS file of all known spyware and update often? I'd pay for the privilege. AdAware may be a good vehicle.
Do you play all the music that you want to listen to? Or did you just stop listening to music pretty much period.
(This isn't meant to sound arrogant, I'm just curious)
As someone else had posted earlier, it's not likely iptables would notice. It would probably look like a web page request on the client computer, which would be legitamate as far as the firewall is concerned.
If this IS the case, thats cool because you could log the packets while the app runs after inserting the CD, and see how they talk to the server. Then using the logged data as a model, you could seed the database with misinformation, or "support" certain bands that you are partial to.
THIS THING CAN TURN ON A DIME, MACROSSZERO STYLE ALSO FUCK BETA, ~NYORON
...a Snow White DVD that ruins your computer.
What's sick is that people will do this. Mostly because they don't know otherwise. It's like the people who install Kazaa WITH the spyware, even though there's a little box that you can UNcheck to not install the garbage (Kazaalite is another story). They just don't know the difference.
"Oo oo! Who wants to know what I'm listening too?! Oh, wait, you already do..."
Remember when certain vocal entities claimed that WORD would inventory your system and phone home to Redmond?
How can anyone be surprised when the topic of profiling via PC usage comes up?
Worrying about it gives offending parties too much cred. I doubt there is any real efficiency in how the data (if collected) is used, much less harvested.
I don't think this will affect you very much unless you actually listen to mainstream RIAA approved music. :-)
The smaller independent recordcompanies probably won't try to alienate their small base of customers by doing idiotic stuff like this.
"People aren't buying our records! What whould we do?"
"Hey, I've got an idea. Let make everyone hate our guts!"
/.Mattsson - My native language is not English, so please don't whine over linguistic errors. (That's lame anyway...)
I want to go park my truck (if I had one) in the driveway of the CEO of this company and refuse to let him out of the house in the morning until he tells me his social security number, date of birth and names of all the members of his family. Then I'll follow him around all day interrupting him and making pissy comments about his poor taste and how he really should subscribe to my newsletter.
Maybe that would give him a taste of the experience that his company is attempting to give to their "customers" by forcing unnecessary and stupid software on them when all they want to do is listen to a CD.
Anyway - I don't know about you but I never play my new CDs in the conventional sense anymore, unless it's in my car. I rip everything to OGG the first time I unwrap the disk, then it goes away for safekeeping.
As long as Enya ads don't start popping up on my TV after my wife uses my stereo
This is not a big deal now -- you have to install their software for the "feature" to work, etc. Therefore some of the people on this site are not concerned. After all, we listen to our cds on real cd players, and don't use their program, etc.
The problem arrives when you must install this software to listen to the cd on your computer. Remember, copy protected cds are out there, and adding this layer wouldn't be very hard.
The next step means loss of fair use. Maybe not for you or your friend who thought Napster was the greatest thing since a windows network on a university campus, but definitely for a lot of people.
Over the last couple of years the fire has seemed to have burned out. We used to get pissed about this shit, and now the highest rated comments don't seem to care about it all. We're letting our guard down.
use any of the available free firewalls so that you can control what goes and doesn't go out to the internet on your computer, the one i use is Zone Alarm at www.zonealarm.com. I block real media player from accessing the internet all the time
http://www.vanillaafro.com - take me seriously and I will shoot you
autorun.ini
Thats it. This amazing technology boils down to autorun installing a CD player on your computer that sends the data back to the label. Don't agree, don't install, and you just use your standard CD player, winamp or whatever, to play the CD. The concern would be if the music was encrypted or formated in some way that only by using their program could you play it. But then you wouldn't be able to play it in a standard CD player.
The vast majority of people I deal with (in the real world) are idiots. And no, I'm not in tech support/customer service.
First can you play disconnected?
Yes then just block that trafic.
Not, then we need to trick the system to think it is using the Internet to get no where fast.
Full excercise is left to the community at large.
It's a good thing none of their CDs play on PCs or this might be bad.
The global economy is a great thing until you feel it locally.
http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=4682 572 ;but i drunk.5 437m enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife :(
<bc> hehe
<bc> god I suck
<bc> hey FI
<First_Incision> I will not discout the possibility that you suck.
<bc> A wise move FI
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: if craig is as fucked up as he seemse
<abu_zeqqzeqq> that will push him to new extremes...
<bc> hehee
<First_Incision> I never understood the stone women thing. Is osm still perving around somewhere?
<momocrome> http://www.clusterlizard.org
<momocrome> osm's site ^^
<bc> yes, though who knows what he's up to
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: change your nick to "Abu'l Hayjeh "
<momocrome> he has a bunch of uninspired match.com pseudo-trolls
<momocrome> picking on hapless, lonely women
<bc> that irc log is hilarious
<dmg> that takest the biscuit
<bc> [bc] vlad... i'2 type 'mo
<dmg> I laughed
<momocrome> post the text to 20721
<momocrome> stir the pot a bit
<momocrome> I am going to rise to their baiting
<momocrome> even thoughI haven't been singled out
<bc> haha
<bc> I must read more now
<bc> county: http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=467
<ivan> Ignore the superfluous comma.
<bc> does that seem accurate to you?
<ivan> All of them =)
<ivan> thx
*** First_Incision is now known as fi-away
<ivan> I can't say, bc. I didn't read it.
<ivan> Should I?
<bc> Yes, you should
<ivan> Haha!
<abu_zeqqzeqq> http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_686841.html?
<ivan> It almost looks real.
<ivan> The one problem is that shoeboy is LOLing too much and Vladinator isn't doing it enough.
<bc> I'm kind of insulted. It represents me as a pathetic drunk with delusional fantasies that I'm liked by females, and that seems entirely untrue
<abu_zeqqzeqq> gratuituous kylie pictures. Proof Allah(SWT) and Mohammed (PBUH) are REAL
<ivan> It does seem entirely untrue that you're liked by females.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc at least you are worthy of parody
<bc> hehe
<abu_zeqqzeqq> some of us are become stalinesque non-persons.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> airbrushed out of trolling history
<ivan> abu and I didn't even get noticed
<bc> craig&osm&trollaxor prolly still like you, dmg
<ivan> "Where's the part where Barry Corrington slags on Jin Wicked for half an hour then kisses her ass when she logs in?"
<ivan> Has Jin ever been in here?
If a company wants to collect this kind of information I'd support it as long as it was purely entirely 100% anonymous. But what guarantee do I have that just the CD, track, and time of playing are sent?
How do you know that they aren't sending your IP address when they say they aren't? How do you know they aren't sending info about files in 'My Documents' or what files are listed in the 'add/remove' section of the registry? And don't tell me the privacy policy says they aren't so they aren't-privacy policies are changed more often than my underwear, and I change that everyday!
I don't mean to get all Mulder here, but I am so tired of companies trying to sneek things past me in a 10 page licence agreement for free software that exceeds the length of my deed if I buy a $300000 house!
[luisa|||] i don't know if i can ever be that weak and female ... So you had no Mr.Buck temptations .. :) .... my tongue feels funny and I like to lick things (people). I need a voice of reason to keep me out of trouble. ... :\/ 674/65#65 ;)3 .net) has joined #adequacy ... firefighters, police, nurses, teachers ;)t ml :-) :-) :-) lol ;P
[luisa|||] i.e. find a guy worth that loss
*** luisa|||| has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 300 seconds)
[county] Why is it weak to confess your feelings to the one you feel for?
[luisa|||] because then they've got you in the knees
[luisa|||] why should i always be the one who cares the most?
[luisa|||] and on top of that, have to cop to it?
[Linux] hey grewat, big cop bust outside
[county] Because, luisa, somebody has to, and if it's them, you'll reject them.
[county] I'm not seeing many other options. How about you?
[Linux] shouting and threatening tones
[Linux] I am going to go walk the dogs past the bust while drunk
[county] What bust?
[Linux] dunno
[Linux] they are shouting at drunks, I think
[county] Who?
[Linux] maybe there will be death
[Linux] cops
[Linux] many of them
[Linux] 8 cars at least
[luisa|||] eek
[Linux] maybe I'll get shot
[county] There are 8 cop-cars full of cops shouting at drunks?
[Linux] yes
[Linux] two drunks by the sound of things
[luisa|||] county, if i find a guy i consider my equal
[luisa|||] it would all work out
[Linux] they are right past the corner of my building
[luisa|||] wait
[luisa|||] eight cops, two drunks?
[luisa|||] that is Not Right.
[Linux] i think so
* luisa||| waits for a cool song to come on
[county] You've never met a guy who you consider your equal?
[Linux] luisa|||, are you actually listening to radio broadcasts of popualr music?
[county] I suppose that makes sense, actually. Most are probably your superior or inferior.
[county] I think it's fairly obvious which side I fall on.
[luisa|||] you could be inferior
[luisa|||] but you probably know lots of things i don't
[luisa|||] and you also are more productive in daily life
[county] I am so far beyond you, luisa.
[county] Come on.
[luisa|||] i love cheesy 80s music
[luisa|||] nah, you are just different
[luisa|||] the measure would be if i made you feel weak and helplessly resentful
[luisa|||] that's inferior
[luisa|||] and only assessable face to face
[Linux] luisa|||, you spin me twice 'round, baby.
[county] If you made me feel weak and helplessly resentful? Haha.
[luisa|||] well, anyone who feels like a lesser person probably is
[luisa|||] or at least is not worth bothering with
[em] you guys still going on about this? God.
[county] Only a few people have made me inferior, and none of them were at all like you.
[luisa|||] it is friday night and neither of us are out carousing, em
[luisa|||] whatever did you expect would occur?
[em] neither am I.
[luisa|||] but you are at uni
[county] em, have you been drinking?
[em] well, I went to a chamber chorale concert.
[em] county: not a drop
[em] maybe I should.
[county] Probably. It makes you more tolerant.
[luisa|||] anyhow, county, it is all moot
[luisa|||] i am not going to bed with you
[luisa|||] so the question of whether you are inferior or not will never come up
[county] I'm not going to bed with you. What of it?
[county] Anyway, it has come up, and it's been settled. I'm superior.
[luisa|||] if you feel that you are
[luisa|||] i do rather want to go to bed
[luisa|||] but i just finished supper
* em wonders if he has anything edible in the fridge.
[luisa|||] i have lovely soup i made from random ingredients
[Linux] katsup is a vegetable
[luisa|||] only for bachelors
[luisa|||] lord, it is four am rising
[county] It's "catsup" or "ketchup."
[luisa|||] okbed
*** luisa||| is now known as gurl
[Linux] night, wheesie
[Linux] I am really nothing like a viking, btw
[county] Oh, I'm sure.
*** Linux is now known as momocrome
*** county has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
*** momocrome has quit IRC (Quit: )
*** gurl has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 300 seconds)
*** bc (gallus@modem-3167.panther.dialup.pol.co.uk) has joined #adequacy
*** bc has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 180 seconds)
*** Marco` (nightfall@cloaked.tlv.netvision.net.il) has joined #adequacy
[Marco`] Hi
[Marco`] Anyone alive?
* Marco` 's off
*** Marco` has quit IRC (Quit: Going down now)
[me0w] g'morning
*** bc (gallus@modem-3080.monkey.dialup.pol.co.uk) has joined #adequacy
[bc] hello
[me0w] Hi bc
[bc] hellow me0wsy
* bc was just in the pub
[bc] and you know what?
[me0w] What?
[bc] a woman in her late forties started coming onto me something dreadful
[bc] unlike some, I wasn't in the least tempted
[me0w] Ahhh
[bc] certainly not
[me0w] Well done!
[bc] it's not a great achievement, I think these things are in your nature.
[bc] Either you adore OAP's, or you don't.
[bc] cool
[bc] scotland beat south africa at the rugby!
[me0w] I think though, in Mr. Buck's case, he may have been wearing some good quality Beer Goggles.
[bc] that's a point. Still, I did have 3 pints, I wasn't entirely sober, but probably not as many Mr Buck. I think alcohol just decreases your reserve, it doesn't make you suddenly find things attractive you don't while sober
[bc] I mean, if you wake up after a night out with a member of your own sex (for example), it prolly says something
* bc has some prawns
[me0w] This is why everyone needs a voice of reason when drinking. I take mine along whenever I am going to be consuming cast quantities of alcohol (the voice of reason is also known as the designated driver).
[bc] hehe
[me0w] cast = vast
[bc] strange, I don't have problems. In fact, I reject much more impressively and fullsomely when drunk than when sober. I don't need no stinkin' voice of reason!
[me0w] When I am intoxicated I run across a problem
[bc] haha! I remember you mentioning this before. That's an awful affliction, though prolly pretty amusing
[me0w] And apparently I become quite the mischevious girl and for this I also need the voice.
[bc] to stop you mixing it up too much? Playing tricks and pranks
[me0w] And the licking
[bc] this makes you sound like quite the handful when pissed
[me0w] A giggly handful, yes.
[me0w] That's why I need a voice of reason.
[bc] I don't think I'm too bad when drunk. In fact, I'm often the voice of reason for other people, despite that we have all drunk hideous amounts. I'm just the same as usual, but more exhuberantly, I suppose. I think I have a good head for booze by nature, that's prolly why
[bc] mm that was tasty
[bc] post-prandial smoke time
[me0w] enjoy
* bc wonders whether to watch "contact" on dvd, which he has, but hasn't watched, though he read the book years ago
[bc] which I liked, I liked the way it was all about revelation, and its validity
[bc] the woman in it was sort of like a hardcore kurobot at first, you know, utterly logical positivist and materialist and dismissive of anything that can't be proved utterly, of revelation, till it all comes back and bites her when she has her own revelatory experience
[me0w] I don't think I have ever seen this film.
[bc] it's supposed to be decent.
[bc] I think a lot of people hated it, and another lot of people loved it
[me0w] I will have to add it to my must see list of films.
[bc] it's a sort of SF thing, in a way, and I think a lot of the people who disliked it were expecting some usual guns'n'aliens shite
[me0w] I normally don't watch 'alien' movies.
[bc] it's not really like that. The book wasn't at least. It's set present day
[bc] they discover an alien signal
[bc] this woman does
[bc] and there's lots of politics and argument about it
[bc] and she is hardcore rationalist and dismissive of the religious people
[bc] but in the end, she ends up having an experience that everybody doubts she had, a revelation..
*** Captain_Tenille (Captain_Te@64-42-74-104.atgi.net) has joined #adequacy
[bc] hey ct
[me0w] Good Afternoon Captain
[bc] el capitano
[Captain_Tenille] Ahoy
[Captain_Tenille] What goes on in these parts?
* Captain_Tenille finally got some sleep last night
[bc] You are admirably offensive; you have won. I am offended, many times over. Now please, leave me the fuck alone. --infinitera
[Captain_Tenille] ?
[bc] I am not admirably offensive
* Captain_Tenille wades through the k5rap
[me0w] There was nothing interesting on K5 this morning
[Captain_Tenille] Nope. Doesn't look like it.
[Captain_Tenille] Yawn
[Captain_Tenille] All right, time to make breakfast, I think
[Captain_Tenille] I may be on later.
*** Captain_Tenille has quit IRC (Quit: Making breakfast)
[me0w] they leave so quickly
[bc] yes
[me0w] I made coffee, but now I find I'm too lazy to go and pour it.
[bc] Catch 22 then
[bc] you need some caffeine to rouse you to pour it
[me0w] I need to hire someone to make it for me.
[me0w] But this person must agree to be paid in post-it notes as I have no funds.
[me0w] My new site format seems to be coming along. I might actually like it.
[bc] hehe
* bc is writing a ranty comment
[me0w] Will it be exciting?
[bc] maybe if you like seeing infinitera being attacked, otherwise it's prolly not your thing
[bc] it will be 0ed though, as usual, by him
[bc] but shant be in the hidden wueue for long
[me0w] I will give it a 5 if it is exciting
[bc] yay
[bc] http://www.kuro5hin.org/comments/2002/11/15/17928
[bc] there you go me0w
[me0w] I am giving you a 5 for the number of words you used
[bc] woohoo!
[bc] I quite often start typing, and type and type and type in fury
[bc] and I don't really attack him personally till towards the end
[bc] infinitera is a twat
[me0w] Well, I think the "I think you a cunt" might be a bit insulting
[bc] it's possible
[me0w] For some anyway
[me0w] I might take that as a compliment.
[bc] I'd just laugh and respond in kind
[bc] I don't understand the people who get so worked up about lack of civility on the internet
[bc] it's all just a laugh
[me0w] It is all for my amusement
[bc] when ubu and I met, we were calling each other cunts immediately, and being dreadfully insulting. We knew instantly we liked the other
[me0w] That is when you know it is true love.
[bc] indeed. I don't love ubu like a brother, I love him like the homosexual partner I never had
[me0w] I should send flowers to celebrate your relationship.
[bc] that would be very nice of you. The anniversary is very soon, actually
[me0w] Brilliant!
*** gurl (~happy@dialup-64.152.253.58.Dial1.Houston1.Level
[bc] hi, gurrrrl
[gurl] hullo, you
[me0w] Hello
[gurl] christ i overslept
[bc] what time is it where you are? 11:30?
[gurl] twelve thirty
[bc] damn firemen
[bc] striking bastards, is what they are
[bc] there was a housefire here, the soldiers had to break the picketlines, and 6 people were injured due to smoke inhallation. The firemen deliberately tried to stop the aid going out to the fire
[me0w] That isn't good.
[me0w] I can understand the strike, but preventing aid is not ethical.
[bc] the fire service should be shut down and replaced with a nice big charity
[bc] they get £21,000 as a starting wage, the firemen, which is well above the national average wage, After a few years, it rises considerably further, and they have already been offered an 11% raise and rejected it - they are going for 30% (!)
[bc] for what? 99% of the time they are sitting about playing cards
[me0w] 21,000 is far too little
[bc] the fire service should be like the RNLI
[bc] me0w, that's a starting wage for a newly qualified fireman
[bc] the national average wage for everyone is £17,000
[bc] this isn't a rich country like America, with its closer embrace of capitalism, where the national average is more like £30,000
[me0w] I guess I just know people who make more than that.
[me0w] I still think 21,000 is rather low
[bc] £21,000 is perfectly decent as a starting wage
[bc] nurses get £14,000, soldiers £16000, as starting wages
[bc] policemen £17,000
[me0w] Nurses should get more, as well as police men
[me0w] The train people should get less.
[bc] well, ideally I'm sure everybody would be getting £1,000,000 annually, but I'm not willing to see the government take more than half my earnings away to give to these people. If they don't want to work for those wages, they can switch to the private sector.
[bc] and yes, the train sods especially suck
[bc] they went on strike at glasgow underground forcing me to walk 6 miles through highly dodgy parts of glasgow in the rain
[me0w] I think that there are certain professions that should be paid more
[bc] I think it is fine, as long as the money isn't stolen by threat of violence off others to do so.
[gurl] er, no.
[bc] a free market would sort them out, it is only ever public sector workers that strike anyway.
[gurl] nothing teachers do warrants more money
[bc] they'd pay fairly
[gurl] nurses get paid very well for their hours and labour
[me0w] nurses are underpaid
[gurl] at least, if the flooded nursing schools are any indication
[bc] also, funnily enough teachers in scotland just got a 25% increase a couple of years ago. There is now a big "brain drain" of the best teachers from england to scotland. heh!
[me0w] Which is why there are a shortage - they go places where they will be better paid
[gurl] yes, and that is the hospital down the road
[gurl] it is a highly paid but stressful job
[gurl] not everyone can hack it
[gurl] thus, the shortage
[bc] here, all the best doctors and nurses go to America
[bc] where they get paid decently
[me0w] A large number of nursing students in Canada go to the US, and the Middle East - they are usually paid more than double what they make here
[bc] we in turn import from India and scandinavia
[gurl] haha
[gurl] but scanadinavia is supposed to be the perfect country!
[gurl] all socialist paradise and whatnot
[gurl] well, the countries in that region
[bc] not judging by the delectable nurses at my local hospital, loads of whom are danish, norwegian, swedish
[gurl] well, being raised socialist apparently doesn't kill the desire to earn a fair wage for services and all that
[bc] norwegian especially, but I think that is because lots of norwegians come to scotland anyway, cos it is quite close
[gurl] lord, i don't want to go bed shopping
[bc] it certainly doesn't, gurl
[bc] shopping in bed, or shopping for a bed?
[gurl] for a bed
[bc] get one that doesn't creak or have annoying springs
[bc] the best bed I ever had was one that was a platform of wood planks, with a really thin mattress on top
[bc] that thing was great
[bc] prolly quite cheap, too
[gurl] i just want a futon
[bc] never tried one of those, are they good?
[me0w] Get a sturdy futon
[me0w] Over time the frame can bend
[gurl] i was thinking a metal one
[me0w] You'll want a thick mattress on it (if they give that option)
[bc] cool
* bc watches Only Fools and Horses
[gurl] actually, i will go tomorrow since i cannot carry the sodding thing home with me
[bc] hehe
[gurl] i think i'll just take the bed frame from my old bed
[gurl] and buy a new mattress
[bc] heh. Sounds good
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*** Sulla is now known as bc
[gurl] it's a gorgeous day
[gurl] but utterly cold and crystal clear out
[bc] I love that
[bc] cold and clear
[bc] and sunny
[bc] perfect weather as far as I'm concerned
[bc] gurl, how did it go with that chap?
[gurl] he friend zoned me
[bc] ah hah
[bc] I did that to a girl week last week after a date. It's surprisingly hard. Requires delicacy
[gurl] so i have a perfectly nice male friend
[bc] well that's something at least
[bc] I have a nice big fillet steak and some English mustard
[gurl] i have a hearty beef stew
[bc] oh splendid
[gurl] haha
[gurl] i am reading about the french foreign legion
[bc] oh yes. That's France's only *professional* section of the army eh?
[bc] I know someone who served in it for 21 years
[gurl] it is terribly intensive
[bc] yes
[bc] long marching through the desert and stuff
[gurl] and no girls allowed!
[bc] http://britishsas.8m.com/training.html
[bc] ^I think that is about the globally hardest training&selection for any regiment
[bc] they are insane
[bc] as part of it, they have the applicant (after a week of insane marching and activity) look after a pet rabbit in the mountains for a while. he is completely alone, and must forage for his own food and protect the rabbit for ages. Then, he recieves an order to kill and eat the rabbit
[bc] quite sadistic
[gurl] haha
[gurl] there's a kill house?!
[bc] they are special forces
[bc] anti-terrorist stuff is one of their duties
[bc] storming embassies, say, like when they stormed the Iranian embassy and freed all the hostages in London in the 80's
[bc] they were the first special forces unit in the world, created during WWII
[gurl] lordy
[bc] Delta Force in the US was founded in the 70's by an American officer who lobbied for it after seeing the SAS and serving in an exchange program in the UK army
[bc] but they aren't as good. They have a slightly different ethos. Delta Force peeps tend to be really big and brawny, and their modus operandi is to be flown in on a big helicopter and shoot everything up before being flown away again
[bc] the SAS are different, in that they believe in more traditional marching and approaching the target on foot. They tend to get dropped far away, sneak about hundreds of miles, attack, and sneak away. And they operate in teams of 8 generally
[bc] http://home.hccnet.nl/22.sas/Operation%20Nimrod.h
[bc] ^that was mad
[bc] I remember watching it on tv
[gurl] so the sas do it properlike
[gurl] well, more like people think such things work
[bc] of course! ie, no hostage deaths, all terrorists dead, seemingly miraculously
[bc] it's sort of amazing
[bc] another famous one was the scud stuff during the gulf war
[bc] one of their missions went wrong, they were given wrong maps
[bc] and they were euipped for desert conditions, but it was frequently -20C and snowing etc
[bc] and they got discovered and stormed by two lorry loads of iraqi tropps, tanks, etc, from a local base
[bc] so the 8 of them killed ALL of them, then walked 100km overnight carrying 80lb bergens in freezing conditions
[bc] they are sort of insane those people. Not qute normal, but very good at what they do (wholesale, efficient slaughter)
*** Captain_Tenille (~jeremy@216-210-218-82.atgi.net) has joined #adequacy
[gurl] damn
[bc] and also, cos it is UK army, it is not just UKians, they select from many countries in the commonwealth
[gurl] reminds me of stephen king's gunslinger
[bc] so canadians and australians and NZers and Nepalians can see the SAS as the peak of their career, if they are good enough to make it through selection
[Captain_Tenille] SAS?
[bc] yes
[gurl] british special forces
[Captain_Tenille] Aha
* Captain_Tenille always thought MI5 and MI6 were cool acronyms
[bc] hehe
[Captain_Tenille] Although for the longest time I thought it was M16
[Captain_Tenille] Which seemed odd
[bc] ct, during WWI it went from MI1 all the way to MI20
[bc] also, MI5 & MI6 didn't officially exist until very recently
[Captain_Tenille] I was just about to ask what happened to MI1-4
[gurl] heh
[bc] having no constitutional checks, the government is free to deny they exist at all
[gurl] haha
*** county (midas@cloaked.client.attbi.com) has joined #adequacy
[gurl] oh look@
[gurl] er, nevermind
[Captain_Tenille] The US gov denied the existence of the NSA forever.
[bc] same as SAS, which didn't officially exist till the 90's,, and is still v.secret
[Captain_Tenille] I don't think they officially acknowledge the Delta Force
[bc] the SAS are fun because they are the first special forces group, and most other western country's special forces groups were founded, usually much later, on that model, often by officers who saw the SAS in exchange programmes and thought it a jolly good idea
[bc] Delta Force being a case in point, in the 70's. Same with Germany's, france's. Greece's, Israel's, etc etc
[bc] but SAS are teh best!
[gurl] it is impressive what humans can be taught to do
[Captain_Tenille] Is SAS just Green Beret style special forces, or does it include PSYOPS and Civil Affairs type stuff
[Captain_Tenille] ?
[bc] that's the other thing with the SAS, the complete lack of traditional army discipline, which was very new
[bc] ct: it is mostly military and anti-terrorist
[bc] there is another group that specialises in civil intelligence
[bc] that sometimes work with the SAS, but the SAS are purely a military machine
[Captain_Tenille] Civil Affairs handles the military's relations with the governments of the countries they're in.
[Captain_Tenille] Should said government fall, they set up a caretaker government in it's place.
* Captain_Tenille 's dad did that for a long time
[bc] coo
[gurl] bc, my sibling is all rotting in the county jail
[bc] haha
[bc] what'd he do?
[gurl] his warrant caught up to him
[bc] damn
[gurl] he owes about 400£ in fines
[Captain_Tenille] I just found out yesterday, actually, what my dad did after he worked as a codebreaker during the Vietnam War.
[county] bc, you've millions, get gurl's brother out of the clink.
[bc] he deserves it, county
[bc] Contributing to the skill of the SAS is the Operations Research Unit which develops unique equipment for use by the SP team.
[county] That's beside the point. She'll be indebted to you.
[bc] ^^hehe, that's like "m" in james bond
[gurl] bc, he found a job
[gurl] and now he will lose it
[gurl] because of extended absence
[bc] damn it
[bc] what's he fined for?
[Captain_Tenille] Aren't you guys going to ask what my dad did?
[bc] isn't that classified, ct?
[Captain_Tenille] He didn't tell me much.
[gurl] speeding ticket, i think
[Captain_Tenille] Just enough to make me boggle.
[Captain_Tenille] zuul, he?
[zuul] he is not
[bc] but he was army, eh? mad
[Captain_Tenille] Wouldn't tell me what he did
[gurl] then why build us up so cruelly]?
[Captain_Tenille] NSA. That's all we would say.
[Captain_Tenille] er, he
[county] Come on, bc, give her brother a chance.
[county] He's trying to turn is life around!
[county] He's in jail because of ancient history.
[bc] you're right county. I will bail him right away.
[county] Good man.
[county] I'm sure gurl will be very grateful.
[gurl] some woman is presently trying to adopt me
[county] But you're too old for that.
[bc] is she older, and with grown up children who have flown the nest?
[gurl] yeah, pretty much
[gurl] except her grown kids are still in the nest
[county] And she wants more.
[gurl] she thinks i'm a unique snowflake
[gurl] and wants to feed and clothe me and all that
[bc] weird, gurl
[gurl] aye
[bc] weird weird weird
[gurl] and the annoying guy at work who kept trying to pay me to go out with him
[county] So are you going to take her up on it?
[gurl] he got in a horrible car wreck and was fired
[gurl] she is rather like mother
[gurl] except less manipulative and deceitful
[county] Did he get fired for getting in the car wreck?
[gurl] not quite
[gurl] he was fired for trying to come back to work
[gurl] with a broken neck
[bc] he offered you money? heh, how desperate
[gurl] well, he is married
[gurl] and also i don't want him
[gurl] but he just couldn't seem to accept that
[bc] "Please come out with me?" - "No." - "I'll give you £500."
[county] That's really harsh.
[bc] it's damned right, gurl
[county] He was so dedicated to his work that he wanted to come in, but he got fired instead!
[bc] I'm proud of you!
[county] Couldn't they just tell him to go home and sleep it off?
[gurl] he got in the accident whilst drunk
[gurl] and it was off duty anyhow
[gurl] so they can easily get him on inability to perform
[gurl] and he could hardly even sit down
[gurl] the doctor hadn't signed a release
[gurl] so however cruel it sounds, they had every reasonable right to fire him
[county] Still, to be unemployed and mangled in these times is difficult. He'll probably end up on the street.
[gurl] no, his wife is utterly devoted and loving
[gurl] and makes piles of money
[gurl] she wanted only to take care of him
[county] He has a devoted wife who makes lots of money, but wants a little on the side too?
[county] That seems risky.
[gurl] but he wanted to go drinking and sleep with other women
[county] I should find a rich, devoted wife.
[county] Having one could be convenient.
[gurl] it was the only thing that saved him
[county] Some guys have all the luck.
[bc] hehe
[gurl] i am sure bc would happily arrange for you to acquire a wealthy wife
[bc] it's true. There's a lucky sod I know who's wife is a civil engineer making tons of cash. All he does is footer about spending her money on computers and crap. They love each other very much and seem very happy. Sickening, it is.
[county] Yeah, I need someone to take care of me!
[county] I'm tired of being responsible.
[bc] BRB, mobile shop
[gurl] have a beer
[gurl] actually, have five or six
[county] What's a mobile shop?
[county] Anyway, that's too many beers.
[gurl] well, however many will intoxicate you
[gurl] women like to help men in that state
[county] Haha!
[county] What nonsense.
[county] Women hate drunks.
[gurl] depends on the drunk boy
[gurl] i find some of them endearing
[bc] damn it's cold
[county] Well, what do you expect? Your house was built before heat was invented
[county] What's a mobile shop, though?
[bc] I am an endearing drunk boy. My cold reserve melts away, revealing a vulnerable and heartbreakingly fascinating character. I find that women are much more interested in me when drunk, than when sober.
[county] uh huh
[bc] county, a shop on wheels that drives around selling things. It parks outside my front door
[county] What sort of things?
[bc] in this instance, I got dunhills and Irn Bru, and a bottle of Gin
[county] So you've gone back to the bottle.
[county] tsk tsk.
[bc] all sorts, county. There are many of them, in fact. Soem are mobile butchers, others mobile grocers and fishmongers. This one sells everyday necessities
[county] Like I said, though, some guys have all the luck. When sober, I'm undesirable. When intoxicated, I'm undesirable in a different way.
[county] Everyday necessities like dunhills, Irn Bru, and gin.
[bc] Yup.
[county] dunhills sound like cigarettes. What's Irn Bru?
[bc] they sell what's sold most in the local community
[bc] county: http://www.bevnet.com/reviews/irn-bru/index.asp
[gurl] what's a good poll topick before i hotfoot it elsewhere?
[bc] poll? hmmn
[county] I don't think I've ever seen any of that, bc.
[bc] favourite spirit?
[gurl] irn bru is only in scotland
[county] That would be all you can think of.
[bc] county, well, it is actually illegal in the US, the FDA won't allow it to be sold there
[bc] so it isn't surprising
[county] gurl, "Favorite condiment to lick off nipples?"
[bc] it contains too much iron, or something
[county] Be sure to include horseradish as an option.
[wsl3] county: Hot Thai Red Curry
[bc] it's very very popular in russia though
[Captain_Tenille] What on earth is it? And why is it illegal?
[bc] ct, it's just a soft drink. It's illegal cos the FDA don't like it's iron content
[wsl3] What is?
[Captain_Tenille] Ah
[gurl] man, i suppose i am not cut out for daytime drinking
[gurl] my tummy hurts now
[wsl3] gurl: Have some nice cock. That should solve the problem, but only if you get all the way down and get the protien suprise at the end.
[gurl] i don't see how
[gurl] protein makes my tummy hurt
[wsl3] They'll cancel each other out.
[gurl] i somehow doubt this.
[gurl] i love my diary.
[wsl3] Nah, I can show you if you want!
[county] Give up, wsl3. The fact is, you can only score with fatties.
[wsl3] give it up county, the fact is, I don't care what you think.
[county] That doesn't make any sense, idiot. I wasn't trying to influence your opinion.
[bc] I love your diary too, gurl =)))
[gurl] hehe
[wsl3] county: Uh huh.
[gurl] there is nothing wrong with fatties, if they have attractive features
[gurl] and don't look like useless lumps of crap
[wsl3] Bingo!
* wsl3 is a FFA
[gurl] fatty fucker anonymous?
[wsl3] LOL
[wsl3] FFA == Fullfigured Female Admirer
[gurl] oh god
[county] Vlad's fatties look like useless lumps of crap, gurl.
[gurl] i HATE those
[wsl3] county is a useless lump of crap
[county] These women aren't fat, gurl, they're disgustingly hyper-obese.
[wsl3] gurl - hate what? Voluptous women?
[county] 300lbs.
[gurl] a girl can be voluptuous without being heavy
[bc] FFA give BBWs TLC and have a GSOH
[county] A three hundred pound woman isn't voluptuous.
[county] She's hyper-obese.
[wsl3] county: I know lots of attractive 300lb women.
[gurl] no, that's a porker
[gurl] i don't know any.
[county] You don't know any!
[county] You're delusional.
[wsl3] Depends - what if she's like 6' tall?
[gurl] and i know some decent looking big girls
[gurl] then she shouldn't exceed 250
[wsl3] gurl: Top size?
[gurl] and that only if she is super muscular
[wsl3] gurl: Nah - I've seen women as high as 400lbs that I'd do.
[gurl] well, men are less picky about that
[county] I'm not.
[county] I'm not interested in girls much over 150.
[gurl] well, that leaves the taller ones out
[gurl] unless they are very slim
[Captain_Tenille] Tall girls are overrated
[wsl3] gurl: That depends - in general I don't find a woman attractive under 175 or so unless she is stunningly beautiful and has a personallity to match.
[Captain_Tenille] *under* 175?
[gurl] that is a shame for you, wsl3
[county] I don't much like taller girls, gurl.
[wsl3] under, yes.
[gurl] i personally think too many people are heavy
[county] Much beyond 5'6" is too tall, I think.
* Captain_Tenille 's gf is 5'
[wsl3] gurl: I don't find it a shame at all! I have a full, active, loving sex life, thank you very much.
[gurl] but that said, i don't mind heavy people who don't whine about it
[gurl] of course you do
* wsl3 doesn't whine - he has no cheese to go with it.
[gurl] i know lots of plain couples that can't get enough of each other
[Captain_Tenille] Off to get a hair cut.
[Captain_Tenille] Ta ta.
[gurl] which is great for them
[gurl] hasta
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[bc] woohoo
[bc] there's nothing wrong with plain people. Or even ugly people, if they are self confident enough and interesting and especially good natured enough
[gurl] ok, i have to fix someone's cd rom
[bc] happy hacking!
[gurl] well, that is true of anyone
[county] Aye, and there's the rub, bc.
[gurl] there is no hacking involved!
[county] It's easier to become beautiful than it is to become interesting or good natured.
[gurl] it's purely a mechanical issue
[county] If one isn't already.
[bc] you are fixing a technical computer device
[gurl] bof, i am fixing a thingy with serrated wheels
[bc] with what, you say?
[bc] that sounds complicated
[gurl] little wheels with chopped bits
[county] A serrated wheel? Isn't that a gear?
[bc] I'm a man, I don't understand technical things, I just leave it to women
[gurl] yeah, i guess
[gurl] two little gears that aren't spinning the drive out
[county] Well, get that cute little can of yours over there and start fixing things!
[county] Chop chop!
[gurl] i have to finish my beer
[gurl]
[county] bc, what should I do with myself today?
[bc] I think you should go to the pub
*** gurl is now known as cdromgurl
[county] It's kind of dismal out.
[bc] and drink beer, play darts, and watch the match
[cdromgurl] yes, do go, since i cannot
[cdromgurl] wave
[bc] that's why I didn't suggest the park, county
[bc] bye happy hackess!
[county] I don't know where any pubs are. In fact, I think they're illegal in Seattle.
[bc] http://www.nwbrewpage.com/wabpubs/WestSea.html
[bc] go there
[wsl3] lol
[bc] though I must say, the huge billboard sign at the front puts me off
[bc] here, they just have a tiny sign
[bc] I suppose Americans insist on the 25foot billboard treatment
[county] That's really far away.
[bc] get the metro then!
[county] Anyway, going to a pub is way too social.
[bc] you don't need to talk to anyone
[bc] clearly, you aren't very familiar with pubs at all
[bc] they can be profoundly antisocial
[county] Of course I don't, but I feel odd being out by myself.
[county] There isn't any point in going out to be anti-social.
[wsl3] Go nude. That will get some attention.
[county] Shut up.
[wsl3] no
[wsl3] You can forget about that.
[wsl3] If I'm in front of my computer, and I see something I want to respond to, I will - same as you.
[county] Shut up, really.
[wsl3] No.
[wsl3] really.
[bc] blargle
[wsl3] bc: What's new with Kip? Has anyone seen him?
[bc] heis in London, that's all I know
[county] I'm going to go shower.
[county] When I come back, I'm going to have some booze, a pastrami sandwich, and pour at my innermost hopes and dreams.
[county] "out"
[wsl3] ah
[bc] looking forward to it
[wsl3] Well, I'll be quite for that.
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[Sulla] hey momo
That latest one is too long to read... ...3 466
<wsl3> We need something new in there already...
<wsl3> Hey, I know...
<wsl3>
<county> Generally, yes, Sulla.
<wsl3> Much better.
<county> And when I do talk to women I'm attracted to, I'm just biting and cutting.
<wsl3> http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=468
http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=4682 572 ;but i drunk.5 437m enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife :(
<bc> hehe
<bc> god I suck
<bc> hey FI
<First_Incision> I will not discout the possibility that you suck.
<bc> A wise move FI
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: if craig is as fucked up as he seemse
<abu_zeqqzeqq> that will push him to new extremes...
<bc> hehee
<First_Incision> I never understood the stone women thing. Is osm still perving around somewhere?
<momocrome> http://www.clusterlizard.org
<momocrome> osm's site ^^
<bc> yes, though who knows what he's up to
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: change your nick to "Abu'l Hayjeh "
<momocrome> he has a bunch of uninspired match.com pseudo-trolls
<momocrome> picking on hapless, lonely women
<bc> that irc log is hilarious
<dmg> that takest the biscuit
<bc> [bc] vlad... i'2 type 'mo
<dmg> I laughed
<momocrome> post the text to 20721
<momocrome> stir the pot a bit
<momocrome> I am going to rise to their baiting
<momocrome> even thoughI haven't been singled out
<bc> haha
<bc> I must read more now
<bc> county: http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=467
<ivan> Ignore the superfluous comma.
<bc> does that seem accurate to you?
<ivan> All of them =)
<ivan> thx
*** First_Incision is now known as fi-away
<ivan> I can't say, bc. I didn't read it.
<ivan> Should I?
<bc> Yes, you should
<ivan> Haha!
<abu_zeqqzeqq> http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_686841.html?
<ivan> It almost looks real.
<ivan> The one problem is that shoeboy is LOLing too much and Vladinator isn't doing it enough.
<bc> I'm kind of insulted. It represents me as a pathetic drunk with delusional fantasies that I'm liked by females, and that seems entirely untrue
<abu_zeqqzeqq> gratuituous kylie pictures. Proof Allah(SWT) and Mohammed (PBUH) are REAL
<ivan> It does seem entirely untrue that you're liked by females.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc at least you are worthy of parody
<bc> hehe
<abu_zeqqzeqq> some of us are become stalinesque non-persons.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> airbrushed out of trolling history
<ivan> abu and I didn't even get noticed
<bc> craig&osm&trollaxor prolly still like you, dmg
<ivan> "Where's the part where Barry Corrington slags on Jin Wicked for half an hour then kisses her ass when she logs in?"
<ivan> Has Jin ever been in here?
I am a "Soviet Russia" Troll Blacklist. Please subscribe to me. Thanks.
[luisa|||] i don't know if i can ever be that weak and female ... So you had no Mr.Buck temptations .. :) .... my tongue feels funny and I like to lick things (people). I need a voice of reason to keep me out of trouble. ... :\/ 674/65#65 ;)3 .net) has joined #adequacy ... firefighters, police, nurses, teachers ;)t ml :-) :-) :-) lol ;P
[luisa|||] i.e. find a guy worth that loss
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[county] Why is it weak to confess your feelings to the one you feel for?
[luisa|||] because then they've got you in the knees
[luisa|||] why should i always be the one who cares the most?
[luisa|||] and on top of that, have to cop to it?
[Linux] hey grewat, big cop bust outside
[county] Because, luisa, somebody has to, and if it's them, you'll reject them.
[county] I'm not seeing many other options. How about you?
[Linux] shouting and threatening tones
[Linux] I am going to go walk the dogs past the bust while drunk
[county] What bust?
[Linux] dunno
[Linux] they are shouting at drunks, I think
[county] Who?
[Linux] maybe there will be death
[Linux] cops
[Linux] many of them
[Linux] 8 cars at least
[luisa|||] eek
[Linux] maybe I'll get shot
[county] There are 8 cop-cars full of cops shouting at drunks?
[Linux] yes
[Linux] two drunks by the sound of things
[luisa|||] county, if i find a guy i consider my equal
[luisa|||] it would all work out
[Linux] they are right past the corner of my building
[luisa|||] wait
[luisa|||] eight cops, two drunks?
[luisa|||] that is Not Right.
[Linux] i think so
* luisa||| waits for a cool song to come on
[county] You've never met a guy who you consider your equal?
[Linux] luisa|||, are you actually listening to radio broadcasts of popualr music?
[county] I suppose that makes sense, actually. Most are probably your superior or inferior.
[county] I think it's fairly obvious which side I fall on.
[luisa|||] you could be inferior
[luisa|||] but you probably know lots of things i don't
[luisa|||] and you also are more productive in daily life
[county] I am so far beyond you, luisa.
[county] Come on.
[luisa|||] i love cheesy 80s music
[luisa|||] nah, you are just different
[luisa|||] the measure would be if i made you feel weak and helplessly resentful
[luisa|||] that's inferior
[luisa|||] and only assessable face to face
[Linux] luisa|||, you spin me twice 'round, baby.
[county] If you made me feel weak and helplessly resentful? Haha.
[luisa|||] well, anyone who feels like a lesser person probably is
[luisa|||] or at least is not worth bothering with
[em] you guys still going on about this? God.
[county] Only a few people have made me inferior, and none of them were at all like you.
[luisa|||] it is friday night and neither of us are out carousing, em
[luisa|||] whatever did you expect would occur?
[em] neither am I.
[luisa|||] but you are at uni
[county] em, have you been drinking?
[em] well, I went to a chamber chorale concert.
[em] county: not a drop
[em] maybe I should.
[county] Probably. It makes you more tolerant.
[luisa|||] anyhow, county, it is all moot
[luisa|||] i am not going to bed with you
[luisa|||] so the question of whether you are inferior or not will never come up
[county] I'm not going to bed with you. What of it?
[county] Anyway, it has come up, and it's been settled. I'm superior.
[luisa|||] if you feel that you are
[luisa|||] i do rather want to go to bed
[luisa|||] but i just finished supper
* em wonders if he has anything edible in the fridge.
[luisa|||] i have lovely soup i made from random ingredients
[Linux] katsup is a vegetable
[luisa|||] only for bachelors
[luisa|||] lord, it is four am rising
[county] It's "catsup" or "ketchup."
[luisa|||] okbed
*** luisa||| is now known as gurl
[Linux] night, wheesie
[Linux] I am really nothing like a viking, btw
[county] Oh, I'm sure.
*** Linux is now known as momocrome
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[Marco`] Hi
[Marco`] Anyone alive?
* Marco` 's off
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[me0w] g'morning
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[bc] hello
[me0w] Hi bc
[bc] hellow me0wsy
* bc was just in the pub
[bc] and you know what?
[me0w] What?
[bc] a woman in her late forties started coming onto me something dreadful
[bc] unlike some, I wasn't in the least tempted
[me0w] Ahhh
[bc] certainly not
[me0w] Well done!
[bc] it's not a great achievement, I think these things are in your nature.
[bc] Either you adore OAP's, or you don't.
[bc] cool
[bc] scotland beat south africa at the rugby!
[me0w] I think though, in Mr. Buck's case, he may have been wearing some good quality Beer Goggles.
[bc] that's a point. Still, I did have 3 pints, I wasn't entirely sober, but probably not as many Mr Buck. I think alcohol just decreases your reserve, it doesn't make you suddenly find things attractive you don't while sober
[bc] I mean, if you wake up after a night out with a member of your own sex (for example), it prolly says something
* bc has some prawns
[me0w] This is why everyone needs a voice of reason when drinking. I take mine along whenever I am going to be consuming cast quantities of alcohol (the voice of reason is also known as the designated driver).
[bc] hehe
[me0w] cast = vast
[bc] strange, I don't have problems. In fact, I reject much more impressively and fullsomely when drunk than when sober. I don't need no stinkin' voice of reason!
[me0w] When I am intoxicated I run across a problem
[bc] haha! I remember you mentioning this before. That's an awful affliction, though prolly pretty amusing
[me0w] And apparently I become quite the mischevious girl and for this I also need the voice.
[bc] to stop you mixing it up too much? Playing tricks and pranks
[me0w] And the licking
[bc] this makes you sound like quite the handful when pissed
[me0w] A giggly handful, yes.
[me0w] That's why I need a voice of reason.
[bc] I don't think I'm too bad when drunk. In fact, I'm often the voice of reason for other people, despite that we have all drunk hideous amounts. I'm just the same as usual, but more exhuberantly, I suppose. I think I have a good head for booze by nature, that's prolly why
[bc] mm that was tasty
[bc] post-prandial smoke time
[me0w] enjoy
* bc wonders whether to watch "contact" on dvd, which he has, but hasn't watched, though he read the book years ago
[bc] which I liked, I liked the way it was all about revelation, and its validity
[bc] the woman in it was sort of like a hardcore kurobot at first, you know, utterly logical positivist and materialist and dismissive of anything that can't be proved utterly, of revelation, till it all comes back and bites her when she has her own revelatory experience
[me0w] I don't think I have ever seen this film.
[bc] it's supposed to be decent.
[bc] I think a lot of people hated it, and another lot of people loved it
[me0w] I will have to add it to my must see list of films.
[bc] it's a sort of SF thing, in a way, and I think a lot of the people who disliked it were expecting some usual guns'n'aliens shite
[me0w] I normally don't watch 'alien' movies.
[bc] it's not really like that. The book wasn't at least. It's set present day
[bc] they discover an alien signal
[bc] this woman does
[bc] and there's lots of politics and argument about it
[bc] and she is hardcore rationalist and dismissive of the religious people
[bc] but in the end, she ends up having an experience that everybody doubts she had, a revelation..
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[bc] hey ct
[me0w] Good Afternoon Captain
[bc] el capitano
[Captain_Tenille] Ahoy
[Captain_Tenille] What goes on in these parts?
* Captain_Tenille finally got some sleep last night
[bc] You are admirably offensive; you have won. I am offended, many times over. Now please, leave me the fuck alone. --infinitera
[Captain_Tenille] ?
[bc] I am not admirably offensive
* Captain_Tenille wades through the k5rap
[me0w] There was nothing interesting on K5 this morning
[Captain_Tenille] Nope. Doesn't look like it.
[Captain_Tenille] Yawn
[Captain_Tenille] All right, time to make breakfast, I think
[Captain_Tenille] I may be on later.
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[me0w] they leave so quickly
[bc] yes
[me0w] I made coffee, but now I find I'm too lazy to go and pour it.
[bc] Catch 22 then
[bc] you need some caffeine to rouse you to pour it
[me0w] I need to hire someone to make it for me.
[me0w] But this person must agree to be paid in post-it notes as I have no funds.
[me0w] My new site format seems to be coming along. I might actually like it.
[bc] hehe
* bc is writing a ranty comment
[me0w] Will it be exciting?
[bc] maybe if you like seeing infinitera being attacked, otherwise it's prolly not your thing
[bc] it will be 0ed though, as usual, by him
[bc] but shant be in the hidden wueue for long
[me0w] I will give it a 5 if it is exciting
[bc] yay
[bc] http://www.kuro5hin.org/comments/2002/11/15/17928
[bc] there you go me0w
[me0w] I am giving you a 5 for the number of words you used
[bc] woohoo!
[bc] I quite often start typing, and type and type and type in fury
[bc] and I don't really attack him personally till towards the end
[bc] infinitera is a twat
[me0w] Well, I think the "I think you a cunt" might be a bit insulting
[bc] it's possible
[me0w] For some anyway
[me0w] I might take that as a compliment.
[bc] I'd just laugh and respond in kind
[bc] I don't understand the people who get so worked up about lack of civility on the internet
[bc] it's all just a laugh
[me0w] It is all for my amusement
[bc] when ubu and I met, we were calling each other cunts immediately, and being dreadfully insulting. We knew instantly we liked the other
[me0w] That is when you know it is true love.
[bc] indeed. I don't love ubu like a brother, I love him like the homosexual partner I never had
[me0w] I should send flowers to celebrate your relationship.
[bc] that would be very nice of you. The anniversary is very soon, actually
[me0w] Brilliant!
*** gurl (~happy@dialup-64.152.253.58.Dial1.Houston1.Level
[bc] hi, gurrrrl
[gurl] hullo, you
[me0w] Hello
[gurl] christ i overslept
[bc] what time is it where you are? 11:30?
[gurl] twelve thirty
[bc] damn firemen
[bc] striking bastards, is what they are
[bc] there was a housefire here, the soldiers had to break the picketlines, and 6 people were injured due to smoke inhallation. The firemen deliberately tried to stop the aid going out to the fire
[me0w] That isn't good.
[me0w] I can understand the strike, but preventing aid is not ethical.
[bc] the fire service should be shut down and replaced with a nice big charity
[bc] they get £21,000 as a starting wage, the firemen, which is well above the national average wage, After a few years, it rises considerably further, and they have already been offered an 11% raise and rejected it - they are going for 30% (!)
[bc] for what? 99% of the time they are sitting about playing cards
[me0w] 21,000 is far too little
[bc] the fire service should be like the RNLI
[bc] me0w, that's a starting wage for a newly qualified fireman
[bc] the national average wage for everyone is £17,000
[bc] this isn't a rich country like America, with its closer embrace of capitalism, where the national average is more like £30,000
[me0w] I guess I just know people who make more than that.
[me0w] I still think 21,000 is rather low
[bc] £21,000 is perfectly decent as a starting wage
[bc] nurses get £14,000, soldiers £16000, as starting wages
[bc] policemen £17,000
[me0w] Nurses should get more, as well as police men
[me0w] The train people should get less.
[bc] well, ideally I'm sure everybody would be getting £1,000,000 annually, but I'm not willing to see the government take more than half my earnings away to give to these people. If they don't want to work for those wages, they can switch to the private sector.
[bc] and yes, the train sods especially suck
[bc] they went on strike at glasgow underground forcing me to walk 6 miles through highly dodgy parts of glasgow in the rain
[me0w] I think that there are certain professions that should be paid more
[bc] I think it is fine, as long as the money isn't stolen by threat of violence off others to do so.
[gurl] er, no.
[bc] a free market would sort them out, it is only ever public sector workers that strike anyway.
[gurl] nothing teachers do warrants more money
[bc] they'd pay fairly
[gurl] nurses get paid very well for their hours and labour
[me0w] nurses are underpaid
[gurl] at least, if the flooded nursing schools are any indication
[bc] also, funnily enough teachers in scotland just got a 25% increase a couple of years ago. There is now a big "brain drain" of the best teachers from england to scotland. heh!
[me0w] Which is why there are a shortage - they go places where they will be better paid
[gurl] yes, and that is the hospital down the road
[gurl] it is a highly paid but stressful job
[gurl] not everyone can hack it
[gurl] thus, the shortage
[bc] here, all the best doctors and nurses go to America
[bc] where they get paid decently
[me0w] A large number of nursing students in Canada go to the US, and the Middle East - they are usually paid more than double what they make here
[bc] we in turn import from India and scandinavia
[gurl] haha
[gurl] but scanadinavia is supposed to be the perfect country!
[gurl] all socialist paradise and whatnot
[gurl] well, the countries in that region
[bc] not judging by the delectable nurses at my local hospital, loads of whom are danish, norwegian, swedish
[gurl] well, being raised socialist apparently doesn't kill the desire to earn a fair wage for services and all that
[bc] norwegian especially, but I think that is because lots of norwegians come to scotland anyway, cos it is quite close
[gurl] lord, i don't want to go bed shopping
[bc] it certainly doesn't, gurl
[bc] shopping in bed, or shopping for a bed?
[gurl] for a bed
[bc] get one that doesn't creak or have annoying springs
[bc] the best bed I ever had was one that was a platform of wood planks, with a really thin mattress on top
[bc] that thing was great
[bc] prolly quite cheap, too
[gurl] i just want a futon
[bc] never tried one of those, are they good?
[me0w] Get a sturdy futon
[me0w] Over time the frame can bend
[gurl] i was thinking a metal one
[me0w] You'll want a thick mattress on it (if they give that option)
[bc] cool
* bc watches Only Fools and Horses
[gurl] actually, i will go tomorrow since i cannot carry the sodding thing home with me
[bc] hehe
[gurl] i think i'll just take the bed frame from my old bed
[gurl] and buy a new mattress
[bc] heh. Sounds good
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*** Sulla is now known as bc
[gurl] it's a gorgeous day
[gurl] but utterly cold and crystal clear out
[bc] I love that
[bc] cold and clear
[bc] and sunny
[bc] perfect weather as far as I'm concerned
[bc] gurl, how did it go with that chap?
[gurl] he friend zoned me
[bc] ah hah
[bc] I did that to a girl week last week after a date. It's surprisingly hard. Requires delicacy
[gurl] so i have a perfectly nice male friend
[bc] well that's something at least
[bc] I have a nice big fillet steak and some English mustard
[gurl] i have a hearty beef stew
[bc] oh splendid
[gurl] haha
[gurl] i am reading about the french foreign legion
[bc] oh yes. That's France's only *professional* section of the army eh?
[bc] I know someone who served in it for 21 years
[gurl] it is terribly intensive
[bc] yes
[bc] long marching through the desert and stuff
[gurl] and no girls allowed!
[bc] http://britishsas.8m.com/training.html
[bc] ^I think that is about the globally hardest training&selection for any regiment
[bc] they are insane
[bc] as part of it, they have the applicant (after a week of insane marching and activity) look after a pet rabbit in the mountains for a while. he is completely alone, and must forage for his own food and protect the rabbit for ages. Then, he recieves an order to kill and eat the rabbit
[bc] quite sadistic
[gurl] haha
[gurl] there's a kill house?!
[bc] they are special forces
[bc] anti-terrorist stuff is one of their duties
[bc] storming embassies, say, like when they stormed the Iranian embassy and freed all the hostages in London in the 80's
[bc] they were the first special forces unit in the world, created during WWII
[gurl] lordy
[bc] Delta Force in the US was founded in the 70's by an American officer who lobbied for it after seeing the SAS and serving in an exchange program in the UK army
[bc] but they aren't as good. They have a slightly different ethos. Delta Force peeps tend to be really big and brawny, and their modus operandi is to be flown in on a big helicopter and shoot everything up before being flown away again
[bc] the SAS are different, in that they believe in more traditional marching and approaching the target on foot. They tend to get dropped far away, sneak about hundreds of miles, attack, and sneak away. And they operate in teams of 8 generally
[bc] http://home.hccnet.nl/22.sas/Operation%20Nimrod.h
[bc] ^that was mad
[bc] I remember watching it on tv
[gurl] so the sas do it properlike
[gurl] well, more like people think such things work
[bc] of course! ie, no hostage deaths, all terrorists dead, seemingly miraculously
[bc] it's sort of amazing
[bc] another famous one was the scud stuff during the gulf war
[bc] one of their missions went wrong, they were given wrong maps
[bc] and they were euipped for desert conditions, but it was frequently -20C and snowing etc
[bc] and they got discovered and stormed by two lorry loads of iraqi tropps, tanks, etc, from a local base
[bc] so the 8 of them killed ALL of them, then walked 100km overnight carrying 80lb bergens in freezing conditions
[bc] they are sort of insane those people. Not qute normal, but very good at what they do (wholesale, efficient slaughter)
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[gurl] damn
[bc] and also, cos it is UK army, it is not just UKians, they select from many countries in the commonwealth
[gurl] reminds me of stephen king's gunslinger
[bc] so canadians and australians and NZers and Nepalians can see the SAS as the peak of their career, if they are good enough to make it through selection
[Captain_Tenille] SAS?
[bc] yes
[gurl] british special forces
[Captain_Tenille] Aha
* Captain_Tenille always thought MI5 and MI6 were cool acronyms
[bc] hehe
[Captain_Tenille] Although for the longest time I thought it was M16
[Captain_Tenille] Which seemed odd
[bc] ct, during WWI it went from MI1 all the way to MI20
[bc] also, MI5 & MI6 didn't officially exist until very recently
[Captain_Tenille] I was just about to ask what happened to MI1-4
[gurl] heh
[bc] having no constitutional checks, the government is free to deny they exist at all
[gurl] haha
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[gurl] oh look@
[gurl] er, nevermind
[Captain_Tenille] The US gov denied the existence of the NSA forever.
[bc] same as SAS, which didn't officially exist till the 90's,, and is still v.secret
[Captain_Tenille] I don't think they officially acknowledge the Delta Force
[bc] the SAS are fun because they are the first special forces group, and most other western country's special forces groups were founded, usually much later, on that model, often by officers who saw the SAS in exchange programmes and thought it a jolly good idea
[bc] Delta Force being a case in point, in the 70's. Same with Germany's, france's. Greece's, Israel's, etc etc
[bc] but SAS are teh best!
[gurl] it is impressive what humans can be taught to do
[Captain_Tenille] Is SAS just Green Beret style special forces, or does it include PSYOPS and Civil Affairs type stuff
[Captain_Tenille] ?
[bc] that's the other thing with the SAS, the complete lack of traditional army discipline, which was very new
[bc] ct: it is mostly military and anti-terrorist
[bc] there is another group that specialises in civil intelligence
[bc] that sometimes work with the SAS, but the SAS are purely a military machine
[Captain_Tenille] Civil Affairs handles the military's relations with the governments of the countries they're in.
[Captain_Tenille] Should said government fall, they set up a caretaker government in it's place.
* Captain_Tenille 's dad did that for a long time
[bc] coo
[gurl] bc, my sibling is all rotting in the county jail
[bc] haha
[bc] what'd he do?
[gurl] his warrant caught up to him
[bc] damn
[gurl] he owes about 400£ in fines
[Captain_Tenille] I just found out yesterday, actually, what my dad did after he worked as a codebreaker during the Vietnam War.
[county] bc, you've millions, get gurl's brother out of the clink.
[bc] he deserves it, county
[bc] Contributing to the skill of the SAS is the Operations Research Unit which develops unique equipment for use by the SP team.
[county] That's beside the point. She'll be indebted to you.
[bc] ^^hehe, that's like "m" in james bond
[gurl] bc, he found a job
[gurl] and now he will lose it
[gurl] because of extended absence
[bc] damn it
[bc] what's he fined for?
[Captain_Tenille] Aren't you guys going to ask what my dad did?
[bc] isn't that classified, ct?
[Captain_Tenille] He didn't tell me much.
[gurl] speeding ticket, i think
[Captain_Tenille] Just enough to make me boggle.
[Captain_Tenille] zuul, he?
[zuul] he is not
[bc] but he was army, eh? mad
[Captain_Tenille] Wouldn't tell me what he did
[gurl] then why build us up so cruelly]?
[Captain_Tenille] NSA. That's all we would say.
[Captain_Tenille] er, he
[county] Come on, bc, give her brother a chance.
[county] He's trying to turn is life around!
[county] He's in jail because of ancient history.
[bc] you're right county. I will bail him right away.
[county] Good man.
[county] I'm sure gurl will be very grateful.
[gurl] some woman is presently trying to adopt me
[county] But you're too old for that.
[bc] is she older, and with grown up children who have flown the nest?
[gurl] yeah, pretty much
[gurl] except her grown kids are still in the nest
[county] And she wants more.
[gurl] she thinks i'm a unique snowflake
[gurl] and wants to feed and clothe me and all that
[bc] weird, gurl
[gurl] aye
[bc] weird weird weird
[gurl] and the annoying guy at work who kept trying to pay me to go out with him
[county] So are you going to take her up on it?
[gurl] he got in a horrible car wreck and was fired
[gurl] she is rather like mother
[gurl] except less manipulative and deceitful
[county] Did he get fired for getting in the car wreck?
[gurl] not quite
[gurl] he was fired for trying to come back to work
[gurl] with a broken neck
[bc] he offered you money? heh, how desperate
[gurl] well, he is married
[gurl] and also i don't want him
[gurl] but he just couldn't seem to accept that
[bc] "Please come out with me?" - "No." - "I'll give you £500."
[county] That's really harsh.
[bc] it's damned right, gurl
[county] He was so dedicated to his work that he wanted to come in, but he got fired instead!
[bc] I'm proud of you!
[county] Couldn't they just tell him to go home and sleep it off?
[gurl] he got in the accident whilst drunk
[gurl] and it was off duty anyhow
[gurl] so they can easily get him on inability to perform
[gurl] and he could hardly even sit down
[gurl] the doctor hadn't signed a release
[gurl] so however cruel it sounds, they had every reasonable right to fire him
[county] Still, to be unemployed and mangled in these times is difficult. He'll probably end up on the street.
[gurl] no, his wife is utterly devoted and loving
[gurl] and makes piles of money
[gurl] she wanted only to take care of him
[county] He has a devoted wife who makes lots of money, but wants a little on the side too?
[county] That seems risky.
[gurl] but he wanted to go drinking and sleep with other women
[county] I should find a rich, devoted wife.
[county] Having one could be convenient.
[gurl] it was the only thing that saved him
[county] Some guys have all the luck.
[bc] hehe
[gurl] i am sure bc would happily arrange for you to acquire a wealthy wife
[bc] it's true. There's a lucky sod I know who's wife is a civil engineer making tons of cash. All he does is footer about spending her money on computers and crap. They love each other very much and seem very happy. Sickening, it is.
[county] Yeah, I need someone to take care of me!
[county] I'm tired of being responsible.
[bc] BRB, mobile shop
[gurl] have a beer
[gurl] actually, have five or six
[county] What's a mobile shop?
[county] Anyway, that's too many beers.
[gurl] well, however many will intoxicate you
[gurl] women like to help men in that state
[county] Haha!
[county] What nonsense.
[county] Women hate drunks.
[gurl] depends on the drunk boy
[gurl] i find some of them endearing
[bc] damn it's cold
[county] Well, what do you expect? Your house was built before heat was invented
[county] What's a mobile shop, though?
[bc] I am an endearing drunk boy. My cold reserve melts away, revealing a vulnerable and heartbreakingly fascinating character. I find that women are much more interested in me when drunk, than when sober.
[county] uh huh
[bc] county, a shop on wheels that drives around selling things. It parks outside my front door
[county] What sort of things?
[bc] in this instance, I got dunhills and Irn Bru, and a bottle of Gin
[county] So you've gone back to the bottle.
[county] tsk tsk.
[bc] all sorts, county. There are many of them, in fact. Soem are mobile butchers, others mobile grocers and fishmongers. This one sells everyday necessities
[county] Like I said, though, some guys have all the luck. When sober, I'm undesirable. When intoxicated, I'm undesirable in a different way.
[county] Everyday necessities like dunhills, Irn Bru, and gin.
[bc] Yup.
[county] dunhills sound like cigarettes. What's Irn Bru?
[bc] they sell what's sold most in the local community
[bc] county: http://www.bevnet.com/reviews/irn-bru/index.asp
[gurl] what's a good poll topick before i hotfoot it elsewhere?
[bc] poll? hmmn
[county] I don't think I've ever seen any of that, bc.
[bc] favourite spirit?
[gurl] irn bru is only in scotland
[county] That would be all you can think of.
[bc] county, well, it is actually illegal in the US, the FDA won't allow it to be sold there
[bc] so it isn't surprising
[county] gurl, "Favorite condiment to lick off nipples?"
[bc] it contains too much iron, or something
[county] Be sure to include horseradish as an option.
[wsl3] county: Hot Thai Red Curry
[bc] it's very very popular in russia though
[Captain_Tenille] What on earth is it? And why is it illegal?
[bc] ct, it's just a soft drink. It's illegal cos the FDA don't like it's iron content
[wsl3] What is?
[Captain_Tenille] Ah
[gurl] man, i suppose i am not cut out for daytime drinking
[gurl] my tummy hurts now
[wsl3] gurl: Have some nice cock. That should solve the problem, but only if you get all the way down and get the protien suprise at the end.
[gurl] i don't see how
[gurl] protein makes my tummy hurt
[wsl3] They'll cancel each other out.
[gurl] i somehow doubt this.
[gurl] i love my diary.
[wsl3] Nah, I can show you if you want!
[county] Give up, wsl3. The fact is, you can only score with fatties.
[wsl3] give it up county, the fact is, I don't care what you think.
[county] That doesn't make any sense, idiot. I wasn't trying to influence your opinion.
[bc] I love your diary too, gurl =)))
[gurl] hehe
[wsl3] county: Uh huh.
[gurl] there is nothing wrong with fatties, if they have attractive features
[gurl] and don't look like useless lumps of crap
[wsl3] Bingo!
* wsl3 is a FFA
[gurl] fatty fucker anonymous?
[wsl3] LOL
[wsl3] FFA == Fullfigured Female Admirer
[gurl] oh god
[county] Vlad's fatties look like useless lumps of crap, gurl.
[gurl] i HATE those
[wsl3] county is a useless lump of crap
[county] These women aren't fat, gurl, they're disgustingly hyper-obese.
[wsl3] gurl - hate what? Voluptous women?
[county] 300lbs.
[gurl] a girl can be voluptuous without being heavy
[bc] FFA give BBWs TLC and have a GSOH
[county] A three hundred pound woman isn't voluptuous.
[county] She's hyper-obese.
[wsl3] county: I know lots of attractive 300lb women.
[gurl] no, that's a porker
[gurl] i don't know any.
[county] You don't know any!
[county] You're delusional.
[wsl3] Depends - what if she's like 6' tall?
[gurl] and i know some decent looking big girls
[gurl] then she shouldn't exceed 250
[wsl3] gurl: Top size?
[gurl] and that only if she is super muscular
[wsl3] gurl: Nah - I've seen women as high as 400lbs that I'd do.
[gurl] well, men are less picky about that
[county] I'm not.
[county] I'm not interested in girls much over 150.
[gurl] well, that leaves the taller ones out
[gurl] unless they are very slim
[Captain_Tenille] Tall girls are overrated
[wsl3] gurl: That depends - in general I don't find a woman attractive under 175 or so unless she is stunningly beautiful and has a personallity to match.
[Captain_Tenille] *under* 175?
[gurl] that is a shame for you, wsl3
[county] I don't much like taller girls, gurl.
[wsl3] under, yes.
[gurl] i personally think too many people are heavy
[county] Much beyond 5'6" is too tall, I think.
* Captain_Tenille 's gf is 5'
[wsl3] gurl: I don't find it a shame at all! I have a full, active, loving sex life, thank you very much.
[gurl] but that said, i don't mind heavy people who don't whine about it
[gurl] of course you do
* wsl3 doesn't whine - he has no cheese to go with it.
[gurl] i know lots of plain couples that can't get enough of each other
[Captain_Tenille] Off to get a hair cut.
[Captain_Tenille] Ta ta.
[gurl] which is great for them
[gurl] hasta
*** Captain_Tenille has quit IRC (Quit: Off to get hair cut)
[bc] woohoo
[bc] there's nothing wrong with plain people. Or even ugly people, if they are self confident enough and interesting and especially good natured enough
[gurl] ok, i have to fix someone's cd rom
[bc] happy hacking!
[gurl] well, that is true of anyone
[county] Aye, and there's the rub, bc.
[gurl] there is no hacking involved!
[county] It's easier to become beautiful than it is to become interesting or good natured.
[gurl] it's purely a mechanical issue
[county] If one isn't already.
[bc] you are fixing a technical computer device
[gurl] bof, i am fixing a thingy with serrated wheels
[bc] with what, you say?
[bc] that sounds complicated
[gurl] little wheels with chopped bits
[county] A serrated wheel? Isn't that a gear?
[bc] I'm a man, I don't understand technical things, I just leave it to women
[gurl] yeah, i guess
[gurl] two little gears that aren't spinning the drive out
[county] Well, get that cute little can of yours over there and start fixing things!
[county] Chop chop!
[gurl] i have to finish my beer
[gurl]
[county] bc, what should I do with myself today?
[bc] I think you should go to the pub
*** gurl is now known as cdromgurl
[county] It's kind of dismal out.
[bc] and drink beer, play darts, and watch the match
[cdromgurl] yes, do go, since i cannot
[cdromgurl] wave
[bc] that's why I didn't suggest the park, county
[bc] bye happy hackess!
[county] I don't know where any pubs are. In fact, I think they're illegal in Seattle.
[bc] http://www.nwbrewpage.com/wabpubs/WestSea.html
[bc] go there
[wsl3] lol
[bc] though I must say, the huge billboard sign at the front puts me off
[bc] here, they just have a tiny sign
[bc] I suppose Americans insist on the 25foot billboard treatment
[county] That's really far away.
[bc] get the metro then!
[county] Anyway, going to a pub is way too social.
[bc] you don't need to talk to anyone
[bc] clearly, you aren't very familiar with pubs at all
[bc] they can be profoundly antisocial
[county] Of course I don't, but I feel odd being out by myself.
[county] There isn't any point in going out to be anti-social.
[wsl3] Go nude. That will get some attention.
[county] Shut up.
[wsl3] no
[wsl3] You can forget about that.
[wsl3] If I'm in front of my computer, and I see something I want to respond to, I will - same as you.
[county] Shut up, really.
[wsl3] No.
[wsl3] really.
[bc] blargle
[wsl3] bc: What's new with Kip? Has anyone seen him?
[bc] heis in London, that's all I know
[county] I'm going to go shower.
[county] When I come back, I'm going to have some booze, a pastrami sandwich, and pour at my innermost hopes and dreams.
[county] "out"
[wsl3] ah
[bc] looking forward to it
[wsl3] Well, I'll be quite for that.
*** Sulla (gallus@modem-2383.lemur.dialup.pol.co.uk) has joined #adequacy
*** bc has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 180 seconds)
*** momocrome (~momocrome@cloaked.client.attbi.com) has joined #adequacy
[Sulla] hey momo
I listen to anything I want on my Powerbook, and nobody knows but my girlfriend.
You get what you pay for. Except if it's Windows.
http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=4682 572 ;but i drunk.5 437m enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife :(
<bc> hehe
<bc> god I suck
<bc> hey FI
<First_Incision> I will not discout the possibility that you suck.
<bc> A wise move FI
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: if craig is as fucked up as he seemse
<abu_zeqqzeqq> that will push him to new extremes...
<bc> hehee
<First_Incision> I never understood the stone women thing. Is osm still perving around somewhere?
<momocrome> http://www.clusterlizard.org
<momocrome> osm's site ^^
<bc> yes, though who knows what he's up to
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: change your nick to "Abu'l Hayjeh "
<momocrome> he has a bunch of uninspired match.com pseudo-trolls
<momocrome> picking on hapless, lonely women
<bc> that irc log is hilarious
<dmg> that takest the biscuit
<bc> [bc] vlad... i'2 type 'mo
<dmg> I laughed
<momocrome> post the text to 20721
<momocrome> stir the pot a bit
<momocrome> I am going to rise to their baiting
<momocrome> even thoughI haven't been singled out
<bc> haha
<bc> I must read more now
<bc> county: http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=467
<ivan> Ignore the superfluous comma.
<bc> does that seem accurate to you?
<ivan> All of them =)
<ivan> thx
*** First_Incision is now known as fi-away
<ivan> I can't say, bc. I didn't read it.
<ivan> Should I?
<bc> Yes, you should
<ivan> Haha!
<abu_zeqqzeqq> http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_686841.html?
<ivan> It almost looks real.
<ivan> The one problem is that shoeboy is LOLing too much and Vladinator isn't doing it enough.
<bc> I'm kind of insulted. It represents me as a pathetic drunk with delusional fantasies that I'm liked by females, and that seems entirely untrue
<abu_zeqqzeqq> gratuituous kylie pictures. Proof Allah(SWT) and Mohammed (PBUH) are REAL
<ivan> It does seem entirely untrue that you're liked by females.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc at least you are worthy of parody
<bc> hehe
<abu_zeqqzeqq> some of us are become stalinesque non-persons.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> airbrushed out of trolling history
<ivan> abu and I didn't even get noticed
<bc> craig&osm&trollaxor prolly still like you, dmg
<ivan> "Where's the part where Barry Corrington slags on Jin Wicked for half an hour then kisses her ass when she logs in?"
<ivan> Has Jin ever been in here?
LA VIE BOHEME
Restaurant Man: No please no, not tonight please no, mister - can't you go - not tonight - can't have a scene!
Roger: What?
Restaurant Man: Go, please go; You - hello, sir - I said, "No", Important customer!
Mark: What am I - just a blur?
Restaurant Man: You sit all night - you never buy!
Mark: That's a lie - that's a lie, I had a tea the other day
Restaurant Man: You couldn't pay!
Mark: Oh yeah.
Collins: Benjamin Coffin III -- here?
Restaurant Man: Oh no!
All: Wine and beer!
Maureen: The enemy of Avenue A. We'll stay.
Restaurant Man: Oiy vey!
Collins: What brings the mogul in his own mind to the Life Cafe?
Benny: I would like to propose a toast, to Maureen's noble try. It went well.
Maureen: Go to hell!
Benny: Was the yuppie scum stomped? Not counting the homeless, how many tickets weren't comped?
Roger: Why did Muffy --
Benny: Alison!
Roger: Miss the show?
Benny: There was a death in the family if you must know.
Angel: Who died?
Benny: Our Akita--
All: Evita!
Benny: Mimi - I'm surprised, a bright and charming girl like you, hangs out with these slackers, (who don't adhere to deals). They make fun - yet I'm the one attempting to do some good, or do you really want a neighborhood where people piss on your stoop every night? Bohemia, Bohemia is a fallacy in your head. This is Calcutta; Bohemia is dead.
Mark: Dearly beloved we gather here to say our goodbyes Here she lies, no one knew her worth, the late great daughter of mother earth, on this night when we celebrate the birth, in that little town of Bethlehem, we raise our glass - you bet your ass to - La vie Boheme
All: La vie Boheme, La vie Boheme, La vie Boheme, La vie Boheme.
Mark: To days of inspiration, playing hookey, making something out of nothing, the need to express - to communicate, to going against the grain, going insane, going mad. To loving tension, no pension, to more than one dimension, to starving for attention, hating convention, hating pretension, not to mention of course, hating dear old mom and dad! To riding your bike, midday past the three piece suits, to fruits - to no absolutes - to Absolut - to choice - to the Village Voice - to any passing fad!
Maureen: Is the equipment in a pyramid?
Joanne: It is, Maureen
Maureen: The mixer doesn't have a case. Don't give me that face!
Mr. Grey: Ahhemm.
Maureen: Hey Mister - she's my sister!
Restaurant Man: So that's five miso soup, four seaweed salad, three soy burger dinner, two tofu dog platter and one pasta with meatless balls.
Boy: Ugh!
Collins: It tastes the same
Mimi: If you close your eyes
Restaurant Man: And thirteen orders of fries. Is that it here?
All: Wine and beer!
Mimi & Angel: To hand-crafted beers made in local breweries, to yoga, to yogurt, to rice and beans and cheese, to leather, to dildos, to curry vindaloo, to huevos rancheros and Maya Angelou.
Maureen & Collins: Emotion, devotion, to causing a commotion. Creation, vacation--
Mark: Mucho masturbation!
Maureen & Collins: Compassion, to fashion, to passion when it's new
Various: To Sontag, to Sondheim, to anything taboo. Ginsberg, Dylan, Cunningham and Cage, Lenny Bruce, Langston Hughes, to the stage! To Uta, to Buddha, Pablo Neruda, too. Why Dorothy and Toto went over the rainbow to blow off Auntie Em. La vie Boheme!
Maureen: And wipe the speakers off before you pack!
Joanne: Yes, Maureen
Maureen: Well - hurry back!
Mr. Grey: Sisters?
Maureen: We're close.
Various: Brothers! Bisexuals, trisexuals, homo sapiens, carcinogens, hallucinogens, men, Pee Wee Herman, German wine, turpentine, Gertrude Stein, Antonioni, Bertolucci, Kurosawa, Carmina Burana. To apathy, to entropy, to empathy, ecstasy
Vaclav Havel - The Sex Pistols, 8BC, to no shame - never playing the Fame Game-- to marijuana! To sodomy, it's between God and me... to S & M.
Benny: Waiter...Waiter...Waiter
All: La vie Boheme!
Collins: In honor of the death of Bohemia an impromptu salon will commence immediately following dinner... Mimi Marquez, clad only in bubble wrap, will perform her famous lawn chair-handcuff dance to the sounds of iced tea being stirred.
Roger: Mark Cohen will preview his new documentary about his inability to hold an erection on high holy days.
Mark: Maureen Johnson, back from her spectacular one-night engagement at the eleventh street lot, will sing Mative American tribal chants backwards through her vocoder, while accompanying herself on the electric cello - which she has never studied.
Benny: Your new boyfriend doesn't know about us?
Mimi: There's nothing to know.
Benny: Don't you think that we should discuss --
Mimi: It was three months ago.
Benny: He doesn't act like he's with you.
Mimi: We're taking it slow.
Benny: Where is he now?
Mimi: He's right -- hmm. Where'd he go?
Mark: Roger will attempt to write a bittersweet, evocative song. That doesn't remind us of "Musetta's Waltz"
Collins: Angel Dumott Schunard will now model the latest fall fashions from Paris while accompanying herself on the 10 gallon plastic pickle tub.
Angel: And Collins will recount his exploits as an anarchist - including the successful reprogramming of the M.I.T. virtual reality equipment to self-destruct, as it broadcast the words: "Actual reality - Act Up - Fight AIDS"
Benny: Check!!
Mimi: Excuse me - did I do something wrong? I get invited - then ignored - all night long.
Roger: I've been trying - I'm not lying, no one's perfect. I've got baggage!
Mimi: Life's too short, babe, time is flying. I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine
Roger: I should tell you --
Mimi: I've got baggage too --
Roger: I should tell you --
Mimi: I got baggage too --
Roger: I should tell you --
Both: Baggage - wine --
Others: And beer!
Mimi: AZT break
Roger: You?
Mimi: Me. You?
Roger: Mimi...
http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=4682 572 ;but i drunk.5 437m enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife :(
<bc> hehe
<bc> god I suck
<bc> hey FI
<First_Incision> I will not discout the possibility that you suck.
<bc> A wise move FI
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: if craig is as fucked up as he seemse
<abu_zeqqzeqq> that will push him to new extremes...
<bc> hehee
<First_Incision> I never understood the stone women thing. Is osm still perving around somewhere?
<momocrome> http://www.clusterlizard.org
<momocrome> osm's site ^^
<bc> yes, though who knows what he's up to
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: change your nick to "Abu'l Hayjeh "
<momocrome> he has a bunch of uninspired match.com pseudo-trolls
<momocrome> picking on hapless, lonely women
<bc> that irc log is hilarious
<dmg> that takest the biscuit
<bc> [bc] vlad... i'2 type 'mo
<dmg> I laughed
<momocrome> post the text to 20721
<momocrome> stir the pot a bit
<momocrome> I am going to rise to their baiting
<momocrome> even thoughI haven't been singled out
<bc> haha
<bc> I must read more now
<bc> county: http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=467
<ivan> Ignore the superfluous comma.
<bc> does that seem accurate to you?
<ivan> All of them =)
<ivan> thx
*** First_Incision is now known as fi-away
<ivan> I can't say, bc. I didn't read it.
<ivan> Should I?
<bc> Yes, you should
<ivan> Haha!
<abu_zeqqzeqq> http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_686841.html?
<ivan> It almost looks real.
<ivan> The one problem is that shoeboy is LOLing too much and Vladinator isn't doing it enough.
<bc> I'm kind of insulted. It represents me as a pathetic drunk with delusional fantasies that I'm liked by females, and that seems entirely untrue
<abu_zeqqzeqq> gratuituous kylie pictures. Proof Allah(SWT) and Mohammed (PBUH) are REAL
<ivan> It does seem entirely untrue that you're liked by females.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc at least you are worthy of parody
<bc> hehe
<abu_zeqqzeqq> some of us are become stalinesque non-persons.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> airbrushed out of trolling history
<ivan> abu and I didn't even get noticed
<bc> craig&osm&trollaxor prolly still like you, dmg
<ivan> "Where's the part where Barry Corrington slags on Jin Wicked for half an hour then kisses her ass when she logs in?"
<ivan> Has Jin ever been in here?
* * * *
God help us all
by Anonymous Coward on 05:15 AM March 16th, 2000 CST (#810)
But mainly help me. I had a long, dull business trip Tues. and Wed., and as a result I wrote the following (5000 words and still unfinished) Slashdot Troll FAQ. I haven't been able to build on 80md's original due to lack of connection, but the doct. below still needs revised. Specifically, it needs to be made more entertaining. See whatcha think.
jsm
Slashdot troll FAQ
We post inflammatory, satirical or just plain weird comments on slashdot, aiming to draw attention to ourselves and to distract discussion away from the matter at hand. We use satire, wit, art and other cultural weapons to give fun to the clueful and embarrass the clueless.
A good troll is a statement designed to inflame the passions of a certain type of reader. A troll is a contrary or controversial statement, which attacks a preconception of someone who is likely to read it, causing them to suspend their normal standards of critical thinking, and to fire off a combative response, without thinking that they are being had. This is the "classic" troll, aimed at enticing someone to make a fool of themself.
Yes. The "surrealistic" troll is a piece of prose, rambling, comic or just downright weird, inserted into a discussion where it seems at once utterly irrelevant and curiously in place. The common thread linking the types of trolls is that a certain kind of personality (read - far too uptight) gets irrationally annoyed by them.
Some kinds of trollish statement have been proven to work again and again, so naturally, some trolls have taken advantage of this fact to repeat them again and again. Certain individual trolls are more or less identified with certain types of trollish statement, and thus we have the idea of a "character" - a fictitious entity which is supposed to actually hold the views which are expressed in the troll's posts. Some of these characters have distinct personalities and maintain narrative coherence from troll to troll (see the "Microsoft Linux" episode between streetlawyer and DMG); some of them show up expressing the same or similar points of view again and again (the RWM and derivatives).
The number one maximally 1337 troll character is the RWM; the most established troll, with the most solid track record behind him. Opensource man and his creations is the oldest surreal troll; gnarphlager and auntfloyd also adopt this style. Paranoid Man is getting off the ground, and DMG and streetlawyer have their fans. Mindless Bastard is more of a style of trolling than a character per se. There are lots more people posting trolls than are listed here; these are just the repeating characters.
RWM is the Right Wing Maniac, a character with a hotch-potch of (often mutually incompatible) libertarian, Christian, and Objectivist views, who typically (mis)applies the general principles of his world-view to various slashdot topics. He tends to be keen on referring to people as "socialists", particularly if they consider themselves to be conservatives. Sometimes he's more of a religious nut; sometimes it's more the free market which rings his bell. There is also a Left Wing Maniac with a yen for spouting dialectical materialism, but he hasn't done much recently. It's worth noting that it is very rare to find a RWM troll thread in which at least one participant doesn't agree with most of RWM's views.
DMG is the Dumb Marketing Guy. He claims to have been involved in Linux for "at least four years, since the very beginning", and offers unsolicited "open source" marketing advice on Linux advocacy to the members of the community. He often takes a rather hurt tone in response to the welter of abuse which is the usual response to his advice.
For crying out loud, they ought to be self-explanatory, surely to heck?
Buggered if I know. Lots of trolls mention cheese, and seem to indicate that cheese has some sort of significance. Maybe it does.
Because he had a hard life, dragging himself up from the streets to get his fucken law degree from fucken Hah-vud, OK?
Well, sorry. But really, nobody cares (see below). You're too easily offended. Now purge the post from your board, log our IP address and go back to drawing your "After Y2K" comic (which is shit, by the way).
We don't do boring, uncreative shit which just makes slashdot harder to read. We're not into denial of service attacks - they aren't very funny. We're probably harsher opponents of the spam bunch than you are, because anything which encourages people to browse at levels above -1 makes our work harder.
Nope. Nezh.
Nope. Nada.
Errrr, well actually yes we have. Both of those ongoing trolls were written by regulars on the troll forum, and you're not going to find condemnation of them in this FAQ.
Read them. Untwist your underwear, stop fulminating over the momentary interruption to your terribly important discussion about Slackware and have a look at some of these posts. Open source Natalie Portman was a fine piece of Burroughsian prose and if you don't agree that it was, then you're wrong. The whole "Naked and petrified" thing was an absolute triumph - it provoked a huge amount of reaction, entertainingly interfered with a few people's heads by sexualising the context of slashdot and is still talked about, several months after the original author stopped bothering.
Sick to you, but that was actually the guy's genuinely held sexual fantasy. He was erotically excited by the thought of women turned to stone, and was letting the world know about it. Don't pretend that you weren't interested - it's absolutely fascinating.
Nope. I was taken aback myself, but there are several sites on the Net with active discussion boards on this very subject. It's not that very different from the subject of "The Fermata" by Nicholson Baker, where the hero has the power to stop time, effectively turning women into statues. And that is quite a common paraphilia.
No, it was a petrification fantasy. Which is something rather less threatening, because harder to act out (how many people really believed that anyone could actually turn Natalie Portman to stone?)
I'm sure she's not wonderfully happy about being the subject of someone else's tawdry sexual fantasies, but it kind of comes with the job. I doubt she loses much sleep.
Opensourceman's works (including the Star Wars series and Fat-time Charlie) are available online at: Craig MacPherson has a website at: , which probably has a few things on it to do with the petrification thing.
Wellllll
Why, for God's sake?
For a variety of reasons, but mainly to puncture the self-importance of a few people who deeply deserve it. Slashdot has a lot of very clever people posting, but vastly more individuals with a serious perception/reality gap with regard to their own intelligence. People who believe themselves to be perceptive, clueful, even deep thinkers while merely reciting lists of conventional wisdom deserve to be taken for a ride. And there's the sheer Skinnerian joy of it - if somebody, or some group of people have buttons, it's inhuman not to take delight in pushing them.
In order to do it properly.
No problem. Whining about moderation is for the moderation thread. Several trolls moderate more or less frequently (and meta-moderate - be very afraid), and there is very little genuine complaint about moderation on the troll threads. Any remarks about $3 crack are meant in a spirit of fun and affection, and are usually merely cris de coeur when a finely crafted troll has been rumbled in the first few seconds and down-modded.
That was funny.
Where is there? We've had a token go or two at Nitrozac and kuro5hin, and an abortive attempt to troll some of the statuephilia discussion boards with discussions about technology, but it just doesn't feel right. If you ain't on slashdot, you ain't, basically, trolling.
That isn't even true. Several of the troll regulars have enough Karma to post with the +1 bonus when they use their regular identities, which puts them in the top decile, according to Rob Malda. And there is a definite audience for quality trolls. Have you just been trolled? Is that why you're so angry? Calm down, it'll be someone else's turn in the barrel on Friday.
To paraphrase gnarphlager, yes, we have many better things to do, but we're not going to do them.
How can I recognise a troll?
If you want to spot a troll, then you're basically entering into a game, played against us. You have to keep your guard up, adopt a critical attitude to what you read and decide whether it is plausible that someone is actually posting that view. For our part, we will intermingle fact and fiction, invent plausible-sounding references and (always) attempt to attack your emotional involvement in a topic in order to make you drop your guard. The more ridiculous the proposition we sneak under your guard, the more we win. The angrier you get, the more we win. And you? As the computer said in War Games "The only way to win is not to play".
Usually, a troll will resemble a normal slashdot post, but will contain at least one thing which is not true. A good troll will contain material which obviously couldn't possibly be true, and would not fool anyone who gave it a moment's thought. The troll will also contain an inflammatory or controversial statement, designed to make sure that nobody does give it a moment's thought. Criticism of Linux, strong or offensive political views, mockery of "computer geeks", claims about the inferiority of women/Canadians/Perl, all of that stuff. Interestingly, having experimented with using outright, Bell-Curve-like racist statements to act as the controversial part of the troll, I've found that they never offend anyone, which I guess shows what a lily-white place slashdot is.
Obviously these rules apply more to the classic satirical model of a troll, but there is a strong family resemblance in the surrealist model. Looking at the best work of osm, gnarphlager, auntfloyd et al., you pick up a strong sense of the underlying form. There is the (often highly tenuous) link to the subject matter, the building sense of cognitive dissonance and then the denouement in which the troll moves into the realm of pure surrealist prose (or "gets silly", depending on how you look at it). Typically, when reading such a troll for the first time, and in the context of the thread, the reader's reaction goes through stages.
At the opening of the troll, in which the technological subject matter is being obliquely referred to, the reader is curious. There is an unconscious assumption that what is being used is a metaphor, which appears opaque but will actually make an argument clear (in such a way the surrealist trolls subvert the category of metaphor as used in scientific discussions). Then, the tension between the what the reader wants to read and what he/she sees on the page grows, but the reader still tries to hang on to the idea that he/she is reading "News for Nerds". Finally, when the reality (that is, the unreality) of the troll is revealed, the reader is outraged at having been tricked.
Thus, we can see that the distinction between the classical and surrealist trolls is one of inversion; metaphor versus metonymy. The classical troll traps the reader in metaphor, creating the "character" or authorial fiction, which the reader takes as a metonymy for "The Other" - the fictional creature on the screen is espousing Microsoft, or Libertarianism, or something else which must be ritually reacted to, rather than read as if it were a metaphorical text. The surrealist troll appears to use metaphor, but creates no authorial fiction. The piling up of the metonymic symbols of trolldom (cheese, Natalie Portman, the Troll itself) draws the reader into the pure text, looking for a meaning (or metaphor) which is always deferred. The reader wants to create an authorial fiction, but this is denied - and it is this denial which is the source of his/her rage. The surrealist troll lets the reader down with a bump - the satirical troll, in its purest form, never lets the reader out at all, leaving him/her stuck in a world which is false, because he/she is being manipulated by the authorial fiction. Classical trolling is about the use of metaphor to create metonymy; surrealist trolling is using metonymy to create metapor.
YHBT. YHL. HAND. (Ha ha, only serious)
Pretty much so, yeah. There's been "trolltalk", "trolltalk2", "31337troll" and a bunch of others. It's good to be able to see other people's work, to discuss trolling, and on occasion to have a way of proving for sure that something you wrote was a troll, to a particularly persistent mark.
If I could tell you, I'd have to kill you. There have been a few problems with people stalking some of the trolls, and spamming the troll forums with whitespace to make them unusable. There's no big secret or anything, it's just that we'd like to think that finding the troll forum requires a modicum of commitment and ingenuity. There's one pretty well-trafficked troll forum which is listed in most of the usual indices. Look, fuck it, you used to be able to find BBSes, didn't you? This is no different.
Yada yada yada.
Welllllll
Write a nice, long post, beginning with the phrase "I'm sure this is a troll, but
The only approved, correct, 1337 way to deal with a troll is not to reply at all. Don't say anything. Just sit back and feel smugly self-satisfied that you caught the troll. Go on. People always seem to say the word "smug" as if it were a bad thing, but how can something that feels so good be wrong? Smirk. Once the troll is "dead" (once the author has taken credit for it and admitted the troll), you might want to post a message about it. You'll probably get a nice reply.
Wellllll
Then you should be prepared to live with being a laughing stock. We live off people like you, who simply can't stop themselves from pouring out conventional wisdom, even when they know they are being made monkeys of. And no, the "I'm pretty sure
Well, fundamentally, it lacks class. For one thing, you're feeding the troll while pretending not to feed it, which is dishonest. For another, you're encouraging lots of enraged people to visit the troll forum. This means that the troll forum gets spammed, the trolls move, and you now will be forced to spot trolls for yourself rather than reading them off the list, lamer. Also, the trolls can't tell who it was who brought the spammer there, so all the other people who used to enjoy reading the daily trolls don't find out where the new forum is.
How can I start trolling for myself?
"Just do it", as that noted provider of employment to Indonesian children once said. Your first trolls are unlikely to be offensive enough to draw many responses, but once you lose your disinclination to be unpleasant, results will follow. Of course, you may incipiently be a natural trolling genius like dmg, who got huge pops from the get-go. Choose a story which will get a lot of traffic, try to get an early, top-level post, etc, etc (here might follow a whole load of shit from the Karma HOWTO which I'm not going to reproduce). And, offend. You might want to start off with a right-wing maniac troll.
RWM is the source from which it all flows. Like an origami master building everything from a folded base, or a woodworker turning a chair-leg, the entirety of the art is encapsulated in this one element. It is possible to dedicate your entire trolling career to the perfection of the RWM (troll gods 80md and 70% more or less have done). If you can't write an RWM troll, you can't write a troll.
The key to the RWM troll is to realise its heritage from Usenet. Usenet trolling was all about cross-posting controversial statements to start flame-wars between different newsgroups. On slashdot, you can't cross-post, so you have to identify people who can be brought into conflict where you are. The beauty of the RWM troll is not so much that he sets rightwingers against leftwingers, but that he creates cognitive dissonance in rightwing readers, because they want to agree with his conclusions (or at least, his less obviously mad ones), but can't bring themselves to accept his reasoning (or simulation thereof). RWM also exploits the fact that a lot of people with right-wing views haven't necessarily thought out those views very comprehensively, and so are vulnerable to cognitive dissonance caused by the inconsistency of what they believe. Among the elements of right-wing mania are:
Obviously, everyone who disagrees with a RWM is a socialist, even if they don't think they are.
Further information
What's your price for privacy?
With a price point in the 15-17 dollar range, you'd be a sucker not to! Folks, you haven't seen deals like this since the 50s!
Keep your packets off my GNU/Girlfriend!
This is TealMicrodot again, still filling in for my friend, the original Microdot, who is having some trouble with an IP-Ban at the moment. He was right about the rampant censorship happening here. Deleted accounts, IP bans, comments being entirely deleted rather than just hidden, weird stuff going on so that certain comments are visible when not logged in but invisible to logged in users -- this is Democracy? We have proof of all of this, and we're compiling all the evidence we get.
Anyway, here's the hyena information you requested:
Female hyenas are virtually indistinguishable from males. Their clitoris is enlarged and extended to form an organ of the same size, shape, and position as the male penis. It can also be erected. Their labia have folded up and fused to form a false scrotum that is not discernibly different in external form or location from the true scrotum of males.
It even contains fatty tissue forming two swellings easily mistaken for testicles. Authors of the most recent paper on spotted hyenas found the appearance of males and females so close that sex could only be determined with certainty by palpation of the scrotum. Testes could be located in the scrotum of the male compared with soft adipose tissue in the false scrotum of the female.
Hi. My name is Theodore "Teddy" Devon, and I'm a 32 year old single gay
white male, who just happens to be an Aquarius/Pisces cusp. If you know
anything about astrology, it fits me perfectly. I'm 6'1" (without my heels),
and 160 pounds. I have (for now) kinda short pink hair. But the style and
color are always changing!!! I am origionaly from Detroit, MI. But I moved
here to Joliet from Missouri. I've lived all over the Chicago area in
general. You get the picture. Oh, and just for all you ignorant bastards out
there who don't like "femme" guys, you won't like me. If you couldn't tell
by the pic above, yes, I act like a fag. I'm a queen, The Queen to be exact,
a flamer, you name it, I've been called it. I am who I am, and I'm not
ashamed or embarassed. And I will not censor or change myself for anyone or
anything. So if you can't deal with that, I'm sure you can't deal with me.
Cher, Cher, and more Cher. Cher is my idol, my hero, my god, my everthing. I
love her so much. She has had such an impact on my life. Along with Linda
Hamilton. They are beyond fierce. So yes, music and movies are a big part of
what I'm about. I'm a pop princess when it comes to music. Cher of course,
Geri Halliwell (ex Ginger Spice), Madonna, the A*Teens, and Tina Turner.
When it comes to movies, I worked at a video rental store for three years so
I've seen just about every one. But I usually see movies for who is in them,
not what they are about. You see some pretty bad movies that way, but a lot
of really amazing, interesting ones that you wouldn't have seen otherwise.
My best friend, my other half, my life, my soul, my everthing, William Scott
Lockwood. I love you more than you will ever know.
Very nice analysis! An "A-"
... The appearance of scholarship is as important as its fact.
It would have been an A+ had you included some gratuitous footnotes or hyperlinks
Also, this Yakov shtick was dead a long, long time ago. I thought we'd deported Yakov to Russia in exchange for dismantling some nukes. But if you look at his personal site, it looks as though he is actually nailing some gigs.
In Soviet Russia, GIGS nail YOU! Har-har-har.
http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=4682 572 ;but i drunk.5 437m enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife :(
<bc> hehe
<bc> god I suck
<bc> hey FI
<First_Incision> I will not discout the possibility that you suck.
<bc> A wise move FI
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: if craig is as fucked up as he seemse
<abu_zeqqzeqq> that will push him to new extremes...
<bc> hehee
<First_Incision> I never understood the stone women thing. Is osm still perving around somewhere?
<momocrome> http://www.clusterlizard.org
<momocrome> osm's site ^^
<bc> yes, though who knows what he's up to
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: change your nick to "Abu'l Hayjeh "
<momocrome> he has a bunch of uninspired match.com pseudo-trolls
<momocrome> picking on hapless, lonely women
<bc> that irc log is hilarious
<dmg> that takest the biscuit
<bc> [bc] vlad... i'2 type 'mo
<dmg> I laughed
<momocrome> post the text to 20721
<momocrome> stir the pot a bit
<momocrome> I am going to rise to their baiting
<momocrome> even thoughI haven't been singled out
<bc> haha
<bc> I must read more now
<bc> county: http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=467
<ivan> Ignore the superfluous comma.
<bc> does that seem accurate to you?
<ivan> All of them =)
<ivan> thx
*** First_Incision is now known as fi-away
<ivan> I can't say, bc. I didn't read it.
<ivan> Should I?
<bc> Yes, you should
<ivan> Haha!
<abu_zeqqzeqq> http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_686841.html?
<ivan> It almost looks real.
<ivan> The one problem is that shoeboy is LOLing too much and Vladinator isn't doing it enough.
<bc> I'm kind of insulted. It represents me as a pathetic drunk with delusional fantasies that I'm liked by females, and that seems entirely untrue
<abu_zeqqzeqq> gratuituous kylie pictures. Proof Allah(SWT) and Mohammed (PBUH) are REAL
<ivan> It does seem entirely untrue that you're liked by females.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc at least you are worthy of parody
<bc> hehe
<abu_zeqqzeqq> some of us are become stalinesque non-persons.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> airbrushed out of trolling history
<ivan> abu and I didn't even get noticed
<bc> craig&osm&trollaxor prolly still like you, dmg
<ivan> "Where's the part where Barry Corrington slags on Jin Wicked for half an hour then kisses her ass when she logs in?"
<ivan> Has Jin ever been in here?
* * * *
God help us all
by Anonymous Coward on 05:15 AM March 16th, 2000 CST (#810)
But mainly help me. I had a long, dull business trip Tues. and Wed., and as a result I wrote the following (5000 words and still unfinished) Slashdot Troll FAQ. I haven't been able to build on 80md's original due to lack of connection, but the doct. below still needs revised. Specifically, it needs to be made more entertaining. See whatcha think.
jsm
Slashdot troll FAQ
We post inflammatory, satirical or just plain weird comments on slashdot, aiming to draw attention to ourselves and to distract discussion away from the matter at hand. We use satire, wit, art and other cultural weapons to give fun to the clueful and embarrass the clueless.
A good troll is a statement designed to inflame the passions of a certain type of reader. A troll is a contrary or controversial statement, which attacks a preconception of someone who is likely to read it, causing them to suspend their normal standards of critical thinking, and to fire off a combative response, without thinking that they are being had. This is the "classic" troll, aimed at enticing someone to make a fool of themself.
Yes. The "surrealistic" troll is a piece of prose, rambling, comic or just downright weird, inserted into a discussion where it seems at once utterly irrelevant and curiously in place. The common thread linking the types of trolls is that a certain kind of personality (read - far too uptight) gets irrationally annoyed by them.
Some kinds of trollish statement have been proven to work again and again, so naturally, some trolls have taken advantage of this fact to repeat them again and again. Certain individual trolls are more or less identified with certain types of trollish statement, and thus we have the idea of a "character" - a fictitious entity which is supposed to actually hold the views which are expressed in the troll's posts. Some of these characters have distinct personalities and maintain narrative coherence from troll to troll (see the "Microsoft Linux" episode between streetlawyer and DMG); some of them show up expressing the same or similar points of view again and again (the RWM and derivatives).
The number one maximally 1337 troll character is the RWM; the most established troll, with the most solid track record behind him. Opensource man and his creations is the oldest surreal troll; gnarphlager and auntfloyd also adopt this style. Paranoid Man is getting off the ground, and DMG and streetlawyer have their fans. Mindless Bastard is more of a style of trolling than a character per se. There are lots more people posting trolls than are listed here; these are just the repeating characters.
RWM is the Right Wing Maniac, a character with a hotch-potch of (often mutually incompatible) libertarian, Christian, and Objectivist views, who typically (mis)applies the general principles of his world-view to various slashdot topics. He tends to be keen on referring to people as "socialists", particularly if they consider themselves to be conservatives. Sometimes he's more of a religious nut; sometimes it's more the free market which rings his bell. There is also a Left Wing Maniac with a yen for spouting dialectical materialism, but he hasn't done much recently. It's worth noting that it is very rare to find a RWM troll thread in which at least one participant doesn't agree with most of RWM's views.
DMG is the Dumb Marketing Guy. He claims to have been involved in Linux for "at least four years, since the very beginning", and offers unsolicited "open source" marketing advice on Linux advocacy to the members of the community. He often takes a rather hurt tone in response to the welter of abuse which is the usual response to his advice.
For crying out loud, they ought to be self-explanatory, surely to heck?
Buggered if I know. Lots of trolls mention cheese, and seem to indicate that cheese has some sort of significance. Maybe it does.
Because he had a hard life, dragging himself up from the streets to get his fucken law degree from fucken Hah-vud, OK?
Well, sorry. But really, nobody cares (see below). You're too easily offended. Now purge the post from your board, log our IP address and go back to drawing your "After Y2K" comic (which is shit, by the way).
We don't do boring, uncreative shit which just makes slashdot harder to read. We're not into denial of service attacks - they aren't very funny. We're probably harsher opponents of the spam bunch than you are, because anything which encourages people to browse at levels above -1 makes our work harder.
Nope. Nezh.
Nope. Nada.
Errrr, well actually yes we have. Both of those ongoing trolls were written by regulars on the troll forum, and you're not going to find condemnation of them in this FAQ.
Read them. Untwist your underwear, stop fulminating over the momentary interruption to your terribly important discussion about Slackware and have a look at some of these posts. Open source Natalie Portman was a fine piece of Burroughsian prose and if you don't agree that it was, then you're wrong. The whole "Naked and petrified" thing was an absolute triumph - it provoked a huge amount of reaction, entertainingly interfered with a few people's heads by sexualising the context of slashdot and is still talked about, several months after the original author stopped bothering.
Sick to you, but that was actually the guy's genuinely held sexual fantasy. He was erotically excited by the thought of women turned to stone, and was letting the world know about it. Don't pretend that you weren't interested - it's absolutely fascinating.
Nope. I was taken aback myself, but there are several sites on the Net with active discussion boards on this very subject. It's not that very different from the subject of "The Fermata" by Nicholson Baker, where the hero has the power to stop time, effectively turning women into statues. And that is quite a common paraphilia.
No, it was a petrification fantasy. Which is something rather less threatening, because harder to act out (how many people really believed that anyone could actually turn Natalie Portman to stone?)
I'm sure she's not wonderfully happy about being the subject of someone else's tawdry sexual fantasies, but it kind of comes with the job. I doubt she loses much sleep.
Opensourceman's works (including the Star Wars series and Fat-time Charlie) are available online at: Craig MacPherson has a website at: , which probably has a few things on it to do with the petrification thing.
Wellllll
Why, for God's sake?
For a variety of reasons, but mainly to puncture the self-importance of a few people who deeply deserve it. Slashdot has a lot of very clever people posting, but vastly more individuals with a serious perception/reality gap with regard to their own intelligence. People who believe themselves to be perceptive, clueful, even deep thinkers while merely reciting lists of conventional wisdom deserve to be taken for a ride. And there's the sheer Skinnerian joy of it - if somebody, or some group of people have buttons, it's inhuman not to take delight in pushing them.
In order to do it properly.
No problem. Whining about moderation is for the moderation thread. Several trolls moderate more or less frequently (and meta-moderate - be very afraid), and there is very little genuine complaint about moderation on the troll threads. Any remarks about $3 crack are meant in a spirit of fun and affection, and are usually merely cris de coeur when a finely crafted troll has been rumbled in the first few seconds and down-modded.
That was funny.
Where is there? We've had a token go or two at Nitrozac and kuro5hin, and an abortive attempt to troll some of the statuephilia discussion boards with discussions about technology, but it just doesn't feel right. If you ain't on slashdot, you ain't, basically, trolling.
That isn't even true. Several of the troll regulars have enough Karma to post with the +1 bonus when they use their regular identities, which puts them in the top decile, according to Rob Malda. And there is a definite audience for quality trolls. Have you just been trolled? Is that why you're so angry? Calm down, it'll be someone else's turn in the barrel on Friday.
To paraphrase gnarphlager, yes, we have many better things to do, but we're not going to do them.
How can I recognise a troll?
If you want to spot a troll, then you're basically entering into a game, played against us. You have to keep your guard up, adopt a critical attitude to what you read and decide whether it is plausible that someone is actually posting that view. For our part, we will intermingle fact and fiction, invent plausible-sounding references and (always) attempt to attack your emotional involvement in a topic in order to make you drop your guard. The more ridiculous the proposition we sneak under your guard, the more we win. The angrier you get, the more we win. And you? As the computer said in War Games "The only way to win is not to play".
Usually, a troll will resemble a normal slashdot post, but will contain at least one thing which is not true. A good troll will contain material which obviously couldn't possibly be true, and would not fool anyone who gave it a moment's thought. The troll will also contain an inflammatory or controversial statement, designed to make sure that nobody does give it a moment's thought. Criticism of Linux, strong or offensive political views, mockery of "computer geeks", claims about the inferiority of women/Canadians/Perl, all of that stuff. Interestingly, having experimented with using outright, Bell-Curve-like racist statements to act as the controversial part of the troll, I've found that they never offend anyone, which I guess shows what a lily-white place slashdot is.
Obviously these rules apply more to the classic satirical model of a troll, but there is a strong family resemblance in the surrealist model. Looking at the best work of osm, gnarphlager, auntfloyd et al., you pick up a strong sense of the underlying form. There is the (often highly tenuous) link to the subject matter, the building sense of cognitive dissonance and then the denouement in which the troll moves into the realm of pure surrealist prose (or "gets silly", depending on how you look at it). Typically, when reading such a troll for the first time, and in the context of the thread, the reader's reaction goes through stages.
At the opening of the troll, in which the technological subject matter is being obliquely referred to, the reader is curious. There is an unconscious assumption that what is being used is a metaphor, which appears opaque but will actually make an argument clear (in such a way the surrealist trolls subvert the category of metaphor as used in scientific discussions). Then, the tension between the what the reader wants to read and what he/she sees on the page grows, but the reader still tries to hang on to the idea that he/she is reading "News for Nerds". Finally, when the reality (that is, the unreality) of the troll is revealed, the reader is outraged at having been tricked.
Thus, we can see that the distinction between the classical and surrealist trolls is one of inversion; metaphor versus metonymy. The classical troll traps the reader in metaphor, creating the "character" or authorial fiction, which the reader takes as a metonymy for "The Other" - the fictional creature on the screen is espousing Microsoft, or Libertarianism, or something else which must be ritually reacted to, rather than read as if it were a metaphorical text. The surrealist troll appears to use metaphor, but creates no authorial fiction. The piling up of the metonymic symbols of trolldom (cheese, Natalie Portman, the Troll itself) draws the reader into the pure text, looking for a meaning (or metaphor) which is always deferred. The reader wants to create an authorial fiction, but this is denied - and it is this denial which is the source of his/her rage. The surrealist troll lets the reader down with a bump - the satirical troll, in its purest form, never lets the reader out at all, leaving him/her stuck in a world which is false, because he/she is being manipulated by the authorial fiction. Classical trolling is about the use of metaphor to create metonymy; surrealist trolling is using metonymy to create metapor.
YHBT. YHL. HAND. (Ha ha, only serious)
Pretty much so, yeah. There's been "trolltalk", "trolltalk2", "31337troll" and a bunch of others. It's good to be able to see other people's work, to discuss trolling, and on occasion to have a way of proving for sure that something you wrote was a troll, to a particularly persistent mark.
If I could tell you, I'd have to kill you. There have been a few problems with people stalking some of the trolls, and spamming the troll forums with whitespace to make them unusable. There's no big secret or anything, it's just that we'd like to think that finding the troll forum requires a modicum of commitment and ingenuity. There's one pretty well-trafficked troll forum which is listed in most of the usual indices. Look, fuck it, you used to be able to find BBSes, didn't you? This is no different.
Yada yada yada.
Welllllll
Write a nice, long post, beginning with the phrase "I'm sure this is a troll, but
The only approved, correct, 1337 way to deal with a troll is not to reply at all. Don't say anything. Just sit back and feel smugly self-satisfied that you caught the troll. Go on. People always seem to say the word "smug" as if it were a bad thing, but how can something that feels so good be wrong? Smirk. Once the troll is "dead" (once the author has taken credit for it and admitted the troll), you might want to post a message about it. You'll probably get a nice reply.
Wellllll
Then you should be prepared to live with being a laughing stock. We live off people like you, who simply can't stop themselves from pouring out conventional wisdom, even when they know they are being made monkeys of. And no, the "I'm pretty sure
Well, fundamentally, it lacks class. For one thing, you're feeding the troll while pretending not to feed it, which is dishonest. For another, you're encouraging lots of enraged people to visit the troll forum. This means that the troll forum gets spammed, the trolls move, and you now will be forced to spot trolls for yourself rather than reading them off the list, lamer. Also, the trolls can't tell who it was who brought the spammer there, so all the other people who used to enjoy reading the daily trolls don't find out where the new forum is.
How can I start trolling for myself?
"Just do it", as that noted provider of employment to Indonesian children once said. Your first trolls are unlikely to be offensive enough to draw many responses, but once you lose your disinclination to be unpleasant, results will follow. Of course, you may incipiently be a natural trolling genius like dmg, who got huge pops from the get-go. Choose a story which will get a lot of traffic, try to get an early, top-level post, etc, etc (here might follow a whole load of shit from the Karma HOWTO which I'm not going to reproduce). And, offend. You might want to start off with a right-wing maniac troll.
RWM is the source from which it all flows. Like an origami master building everything from a folded base, or a woodworker turning a chair-leg, the entirety of the art is encapsulated in this one element. It is possible to dedicate your entire trolling career to the perfection of the RWM (troll gods 80md and 70% more or less have done). If you can't write an RWM troll, you can't write a troll.
The key to the RWM troll is to realise its heritage from Usenet. Usenet trolling was all about cross-posting controversial statements to start flame-wars between different newsgroups. On slashdot, you can't cross-post, so you have to identify people who can be brought into conflict where you are. The beauty of the RWM troll is not so much that he sets rightwingers against leftwingers, but that he creates cognitive dissonance in rightwing readers, because they want to agree with his conclusions (or at least, his less obviously mad ones), but can't bring themselves to accept his reasoning (or simulation thereof). RWM also exploits the fact that a lot of people with right-wing views haven't necessarily thought out those views very comprehensively, and so are vulnerable to cognitive dissonance caused by the inconsistency of what they believe. Among the elements of right-wing mania are:
Obviously, everyone who disagrees with a RWM is a socialist, even if they don't think they are.
Further information
And some who do.
I browse Slashdot at +3, Funny
Kicked Vlad's Ass On Trolltalk by the AV3
(To the tune of Cleaning Out My Closet by Eminem)
I'm sorry Lockwood!
I really meant to hurt you!
I'm glad that I could make you cry, and tonight
I kicked your ass on Trolltalk.
I said I'm sorry Scotty!
It's really fun to flame you!
It's not real hard to make you cry, and tonight
I called you out on Trolltalk.
Vlad's got some skeletons in his closet
And I think that everyone knows it
There's so much shit in his mouth that he can't close it
I'ma expose him; I'll take you back to '69
Before he started crapflooding Slashdot all the time
He was a baby, maybe just a couple of months
The Priest at his church bit off his penis for lunch
Now he's grown up, and he likes to fuck kids in the eye
No person would love him; we all wish he would die
He's got a hippo for a wife who'd never leave his side
She WANTS to leave, though, but she's too fat to try
To squeeze her ass out the door, so her life's a mistake
She and Scott should both die, for their own Vlad-damn sake
But Vlad's a behemoth, and might not get out of bed today
We all know that he's stupid; no doubt that he's dumb
And the dumbest shit he did was not shoot himself with that gun
He shoulda killed himself, him and Theresa both
They've got no life, so just call them "The Crapflooder Show"
I'm sorry Vladdy!
It's so tempting to flame you!
You really want to make me hurl, and tonight
I kicked Vlad's ass on Trolltalk.
I said I'm sorry Lockwood!
It's easy shit to hurt him!
It's mighty fun to ream him good, and tonight
I called him out on Trolltalk.
Now I would never diss Scott just to get recognition
Take a second to listen to why it's him that I'm dissin'
But put yourself in my position, just try to envision
Witnessing a man being an asshole for a livin'
Crying and moaning about others when his own civility's missin'
DoSing and spamming, practicing Asshole-Jerk Syndrome
His whole life he's been a Nazi to others
Now he grew up, got no friends, and a really huge stomach
Isn't it? Isn't that the reason he's even hated by his own Ma?
He cries in his bathtub and he has to wear a bra
But guess what, Scott's getting older, and he's going to die lonely
He's been divorced three times, and they all think he's a phony
He's so evil now, he could never know something beautiful
Nobody likes him, he'll be the only one at his funeral!
See what sucks about him most is he won't admit he's a dick
Everybody who knows him thinks he should be beat with a stick
What he doesn't know is what you give, you will get
That selfish punk, now it's time for him to drown in his own shit
Remember when he was dumped by wives #1 2 and 3?
Well guess what, everyone hates him; that's the way it should be!
I'm sorry William!
It's so much fun to hurt you!
I know you're gunna go and cry, and tonight
Scott's crying in his bathtub.
I said I'm sorry Scotty!
Too bad that you're unstable!
Maybe you should see a shrink, but tonight
I'll shred your ass on Trolltalk.
I'm sorry Lockwood!
Too bad I have to hurt you!
You're responsible for what you do, and tonight
You're hereby banned from Trolltalk.
I said I'm sorry Cockface!
I only try to help you!
You need to reasses your life, and for now,
Stay fuck away from Trolltalk.
Continuing the tradition of unearthing historical documents that have, until now, been lost to the mists of time, I present you with the original replies to the original Slashdot Troll FAQ, all from the previous millennium. I will be working hard to unearth, collect, and archive historical documents for the sake of preserving them for future generations of trollers.
:)
:) (ask 70%), and (b) I just don't think of it as an adversarian relationship; they may sometimes be a bit clueless, but they're helping to make my troll a success and I'm grateful for that. Much of what I write is a "what's wrong with this picture" puzzle, and if so, I can hardly fault people for solving it, can I?
:) who respond to my trolls, and most of them are good sports about it when I tell them I'm a troll.
:)
:)
... (Troll FAQ) (Score:0)
;-) Much giggling was heard from my desk.
/., we can pass around maybe sid=trollfaq or even the more arrogant sid=faq ;-) Of course, we'd have to "refresh" it every two weeks, but it's better than nothing ;-)
:)
* * * *
Dear God! (Score:0)
by Anonymous Coward on 09:05 AM March 16th, 2000 CST (#817)
You're more verbose than I am! I never knew that about you
I'd like to get my two cents in; mainly, I don't agree with your characterization of those who get trolled, for two reasons: (a) I've been trolled myself more than once
Another thing is that responders don't always spout conventional wisdom; in fact, I'd describe the libertarian/capitalist and misogynist RWMs as an exaggeration of conventional wisdom, at least the kind on Slashdot. The goal there IMHO is to get people to agree! You've also got people like the ones who explained the Quaker faith and the AFSC in my recent FBI troll: How many Slashbots know the AFSC from their elbow? Not many. There was a real need to inform people there, and I was hoping somebody would. The fact is, I meet a lot of nice, sensible people (nicer and more sensible than me, anyhow
I'm also not comfortable with the "elite" thing. IMHO we should try not to congratulate ourselves too much. This gets back to the "adversarial relationship" thing, I guess. I'd like the tone of the FAQ to be more "letting them in on the joke" than "ha ha, sucker".
Next: Cri de coeur should be italicized, dammit!
Lastly: I dig the "ritual reaction" thing, but I couldn't parse the rest of that riff about metaphor and metonymy at all. IHBT?
--80md
* * * *
Re:God help us all
by Anonymous Coward on 08:11 AM March 16th, 2000 CST (#815)
destined to become a classic. when this is completed, i would post it nice and prominently on a few innocent, unsuspecting stories. with a link to it, wherever it finds a home. i can put it on my server... just email me the exact html you want to use and be sure to sign it.
-osm
* * * *
teeheehee (Score:2)
by gnarphlager on 06:46 AM March 16th, 2000 CST (#812)
(User Info)
God I needed something this morning. This works
Anyway; give me some time, I'm sure I can add my two cents. I'm sure we're ALL going to mirror it on some webpage somewhere, but as for here on
I feel the desire to use the expression "gateway drug".
* * * *
Excellent! (Score:0)
by Anonymous Coward on 05:37 AM March 16th, 2000 CST (#811)
Now that rules! It needs to be posted somewhere where people can see it once it's completed. I'll definitely keep a copy on my website. Anyway, some more points to add:
Should I "feed" my trolls?
Feeding trolls needs to be done to people who outright flame your troll or who ask loads of dumb questions in an attempt to be reasonable. The longer their reply is, the better it is to reply to them. And if they get moderated up for their vacuous party-line response, troll them again
Anyway thanks for an amusing and (5, Insightful) read (or is it (-1, Offtopic)?) and I'll look foward to the finished version.
-- spiralx
Another one of the many benefits of listening to vinyl :)
I'm getting closer and closer to just taking my system off the net. Reading slashdot, penny arcade and looking up movie showtimes is really not worth the hassle of every tom dick and harry knowing all there is to know about me. No, I don't have anything to hide. But, its my decision who I let know things about me. If that means get off the net, then fine.
-
It's been my experience that people who cry "whaaa, whaaa, I'm going to sue you!" or "whaaa, whaaa, I'm going to come to your house and kick your ass!" or "whaaa, whaaa, I'm going to call the police and have them arrest you for being mean to me" whenever they feel personally offended on the Internet tend to be terribly immature and have serious emotional problems. People who aren't confident with themselves and feel inferior about their own abilities try to boost their own self-esteem by making empty threats of lawsuits or physical assault whenever they're on the losing end of a flamewar.
His face will turn red, he'll start to wheeze and stutter, and he will angrily type, "Yeah, well, just wait until I tell my uncle at the CIA about how rude you've been to me! He'll come and arrest you and you'll go to jail and I'll sue you for everything you have! Then I'll kick your ass, and have sex with your girlfriend!"
He will then drag his corpulent, out-of-shape, virginal body across the basement to bed and drift off to slumber thinking "Wow, I'm sure I really scared those bastards! I'm sure they'll think twice before disagreeing with ME again!" He'll feel only a slight twinge of hollow emptiness the next day when he sees his uncle, who rather than working for the CIA, is actually the assistant janitor at the local McDonald's.
A few people who seem to fit the stereotype quite well of being absolute assholes on the Internet and then threatening to sue or call the FBI, CIA, and KGB when anyone who calls them on it:
Bernard Shifman
Robert Novak
Scott Lockwood
Were these three people long-lost triplets, seperated at birth? Why do they behave in exactly the same way? Do they share a common mental disease? Or are they all actually the same person? We may never know.
I really get Irked by this kind of BS..apparently there are supposed to be a bunch of hackers on this site..why dont you guys tear up places like this? I'm not playing to the largerthanlife hacker stereotype either..I know what geeks/hackers are like..I am one..I just wish you guys would use your powers to improve life for the whole of the internet more often..hope I dont lose points for this post..
"I feel it is my duty to look at the porn that kids download before I delete it, to be sure what it is."--School Admin
Dear Trolls,
It has occured to me that you think that chainrust is me. I have received replies for emails I did not write, and other nonsense.
Thankfully, Chainrust (aka Pumpernickel and other nicks according to you) has contacted me to make the situation clear. Let me clear it further for the challenged of us out there:
Chainrust's name is not Jared Stattlemeyer. You have hardly any chance of finding his real identity (no, I will not tell you).
I am not Chainrust of Adequacy or Slashdot or K5.
The phone numbers you have published are not mine, but they may be of some other Jared Stattlemeyer, an Astroglide user in Jerusalem. The same goes for the email addresses.
In short, you are dumb. Very very dumb. The next time you decide that you can come to the right conclusions based on an incomplete evidence, please remember the above.
Oh, and by the way. I have your IPs. You visited my site, after all, didn't you? Does 64.94.151.187 look familiar? I have more. Think about that if you decide to harass that fellow in Jerusalem via phone. I will be the first to consult him on how to file a formal complaint with the police (I happen to volunteer in the Civil Guard). The "Jewish country" and US have signed agreements just for such cases.
Best regards,
Jared Stattlemeyer
You were fun when you were intelligent, now you are just stupid.
Wow, ohmyGOD, Pumpernickel told me to FOAD. I guess I'd better do what he says!! Oh, wait. There's absolutely no reason for me to do what he says, now that I think about it.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material.
Confidential material.
Confidential material.
Confidentail material.
That's just scratching the surface. I could go back further, if you like.
If you actually look, you'll see that 90% of the real spam (multiple identical messages posted minute apart in an attempt to push our messages off the page) is posted by our enemies, Lockwood and his VladeKua5y minions. Maybe you just don't read carefully.
We generate more original material than evaryone else here COMBINED, and we generate BETTER stuff, too. We ARE Trolltalk. We are what's keeping it alive despite all attempts to destroy it. YOU are one of those attempts.
Music CDs with a EULA, coming to a CD-ROM near you.
to download Britney's newest album.
"All animals are created equal, but some animals are more equal than others." - George Orwell
[dmg] "http://www.jang-group.com/thenews/sep2002-weekly/ iqra-20-09-2002/#3" ;but i drunk.2 572m enu=news.quirkiesm enu=news.weirdworld.sexlifem enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife5 437m enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife :( :-) :(m enu=news.weirdworld.badtaste :\
[dmg] "The Holy Prophet (Sall Allaho alaihe wasallam) used to joke, but he never said anything but the truth in his jokes. "
[dmg] "trolling with the truth" is a halal Islamic technique....
[dmg] there we have it.
[dmg] Trolling is sanctioned by Allah (swt(
[momocrome] wonderful
[bc] haha-haaa
[bc] that irc log is hilarious
[dmg] that takest the biscuit
[bc] [bc] vlad... i'2 type 'mo
[dmg] I laughed
[momocrome] post the text to 20721
[momocrome] stir the pot a bit
[momocrome] I am going to rise to their baiting
[momocrome] even thoughI haven't been singled out
[bc] haha
[bc] I must read more now
[dmg] "In "al-Adab al-Mufrad", Bukhari reports from Bakr bin Abdullah, who said: "The Companions of the Holy Prophet (Sall Allaho alaihe wasallam) used to throw melon-rinds at one another, but when the matter was serious, they were the only true men."
[dmg]
[dmg] "
[dmg] So its OK to throw melon rinds at people ?
[momocrome] it is comical, in fact
[dmg] The more I read about Islam, the less it makes sense.
[dmg] that sounds like slapstick humor.
[dmg] do you think custard pies would be ok ?
[momocrome] God Willing, I will get you with this melon rind!
[dmg] are there any hadith on this ?
[momocrome] No you shall not, God Willing!
[dmg] LOL
[momocrome] I like the way they can become the only true men at a moment's notice
[bc] it's amazing how they STILL go on about perdida
[dmg] http://www.world-sex-records.com/sex-076.htm "The Hardy Cocks of Upper Egypt"
[shoeboy] I need to go home
*** dmg is now known as abu_zeqqzeqq
[shoeboy] but I haven't put in 8 hours
[abu_zeqqzeqq] "In the Kinsey survey of more than 5000 men, three or four were found who could ejaculate by deliberately concentrating on sexual fantasies, without any genital manipulation - "In such a case the psychic stimulation is entirely responsible for the result." Two or three males in a thousand are able to suck their own penises to achieve orgasm and ejaculation. "
*** cyndrekit is now known as cyn-away
[abu_zeqqzeqq] http://www.world-sex-records.com/sex-054.htm
[bc] Contemplating suicide everyday, Barry someday hopes to either grow the testicles to off himself or to fall in love with some fat-ankled trash-eating Scottish sow. I don't see a difference between the two fates, but anything is better than not being to tell a dirty joke.
[bc] hahaha
[bc] oh god
[bc] trollaxor is great
[abu_zeqqzeqq] "Masturbation is said to be so widespread among both married and unmarried Muslim females throughout Africa and the East that "it is commonly regarded by the menfolk as customary and matter-of-fact" (A. Edwards & R. E. L. Masters, "The Cradle of Erotica"). "Rubbing" or "pounding" is considered a natural manifestation of feminine nature - for "women's passion is ten times greater than man's." In this spirit it has been suggested
[abu_zeqqzeqq] http://www.world-sex-records.com/sex-040.htm
[bc] hehe
[abu_zeqqzeqq] I feel abused and left out.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] nobody cares enough to parody me.
[bc] wow, and actual troll on listed on trolltalk, only after I've read 200 posts
[bc] 200 posts bashing perdida, adequacy, and everyone in here (but dmg)
[bc] dmg: I never used to get bashed, then I banned trollaxor from here and put him on ignore
[momocrome] I get no love neither
[bc] so that's what's prolly sparked off the names and shite
[abu_zeqqzeqq] I actually like trollaxor's stuff.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] especially the LGC
[abu_zeqqzeqq] momocrome: its just not fair.
[bc] SIR!!! (Score:0)
[bc] by Anonymous Coward on Wednesday November 13, @11:12AM (#4660016)
[bc] I apologize for revealing your personal information. I try very hard, I truly do, but sometimes my overzealous urges take the better of me. Jesus will not be pleased. I have much contemplating to do regarding Christ and sitting in front of Slashdot all day being a prick.
[bc] SIR, I AM SARRY!!!
[bc] Have a nice day,
[bc] Craig McPherson
[bc] LOL
[abu_zeqqzeqq] tee hee
* bc decides to post a comment
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Did you see my repsonse ?
[abu_zeqqzeqq] about the 10" cocks ?
[bc] I guessed that was you! it was fun
[abu_zeqqzeqq] We need to post a load of ludicrous links to people with the same names.
* bc writes post designed to provoke craig
[bc] Is this a good idea? prolly not, but I don't care
*** First_Incision (~First_Inc@66.168.225.239) has joined #adequacy
[abu_zeqqzeqq] hey First Incision
[First_Incision] hello
[First_Incision] who be ye?
[abu_zeqqzeqq] i am dmg
[First_Incision] ok
[abu_zeqqzeqq] abu zeqqzeqq is an Islamic name
[abu_zeqqzeqq] meaning "the father of thrusters"
[First_Incision] haha
[bc] http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=468
[bc] hehe
[bc] god I suck
[bc] hey FI
[First_Incision] I will not discout the possibility that you suck.
[bc] A wise move FI
[abu_zeqqzeqq] bc: if craig is as fucked up as he seemse
[abu_zeqqzeqq] that will push him to new extremes...
[bc] hehee
[bc] I like the idea of adding together his fetish for stone women, and his religomania
[momocrome] heh
[First_Incision] I never understood the stone women thing. Is osm still perving around somewhere?
[momocrome] http://www.clusterlizard.org
[momocrome] osm's site ^^
[bc] yes, though who knows what he's up to
[abu_zeqqzeqq] bc: change your nick to "Abu'l Hayjeh "
[momocrome] he has a bunch of uninspired match.com pseudo-trolls
[momocrome] picking on hapless, lonely women
[First_Incision] clusterlizard, that sounds familiar for some reason. Is that from that "lexx show"?
[momocrome] yes
[momocrome] he has a thing for the first female lead
[abu_zeqqzeqq] http://www.world-sex-records.com/sex-105.htm
[momocrome] it is one of the sections
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Abu'l Hayjeh who deflowered eighty virgins in a single night,
[shoeboy] I shouldn't follow your links, bc
[shoeboy] Click the really excited choir boy!
*** county (midas@cloaked.client.attbi.com) has joined #adequacy
[bc] hehe shoeboy
[county] hey folks
[abu_zeqqzeqq] hey county
*** bc is now known as Abu
*** Abu is now known as Abul_Hayjeh
*** Abul_Hayjeh is now known as Abu`l_Hayjeh
[Abu`l_Hayjeh] that works
[Abu`l_Hayjeh] hi county!
[county] fuckin muslim
[Abu`l_Hayjeh] ]:(
[county] what
[Abu`l_Hayjeh] I did deflower 80 virgins in a single night, county
[Abu`l_Hayjeh] I am due some respect
[abu_zeqqzeqq] fuck off, infidel
[abu_zeqqzeqq] I am the "father of thrusters"
[county] i bet
[abu_zeqqzeqq] #adequacy is teh Islamic IRC channel
[abu_zeqqzeqq] no INFIDELS ALLOWED
[abu_zeqqzeqq] pick an islamic name, or piss off.
[county] well its luky that im a muslim tehn
*** shoeboy is now known as Mohammed_Iqbal
[county] then
[Mohammed_Iqbal] I went to middle school with a Mohammed Iqbal
[Mohammed_Iqbal] don't think he set any sex records
[Mohammed_Iqbal] but then again, I didn't ask
[Abu`l_Hayjeh] hehe
*** Abu`l_Hayjeh is now known as badmash
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Mohammed Iqbal is one of the best URDU poets
*** First_Incision is now known as Abdullah
[abu_zeqqzeqq] but it probably wasn't the same guy you were at school with.
*** Abdullah is now known as Abdullah_Camel
*** county is now known as ivan
*** Abdullah_Camel is now known as First_Incision
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Al-Quaida, Infidels, Zionist, Dirty Bomb, Great Satan etc etc etc
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Did you know that Saddam Hussain's favorite sweets are "quality street" ?
[ivan] i wouldve marked him as an m&m man
[abu_zeqqzeqq] http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_672471.html?
[abu_zeqqzeqq] there you go.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] !Tariq Aziz puts HP Sauce on every dinner!
[ivan] are muslims allowed to have sex?
[abu_zeqqzeqq] "After returning from a meeting with Saddam last month Labour MP George Galloway revealed the dictator offered him Quality Street chocolates and spoke of his admiration for British buses."
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Saddam has obviously never been on a British bus in his life...
[abu_zeqqzeqq] http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_709336.html?
[abu_zeqqzeqq] "Oral sex is not adultery"
[ivan] ive noticed that here in seatlte an awful lot of carsw ant to get hit by a bus
[ivan] theyre utterly stupid around them
[abu_zeqqzeqq] http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_700505.html?
[abu_zeqqzeqq] "
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Some male lawmakers are demanding rights to sex be guaranteed in the domestic violence legislation.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] "
[abu_zeqqzeqq] The Minister claimed that some people turned into gays and lesbians because they did not get enough heterosexual sex.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] "It is all because of sexual denial. As a biology teacher, I know how the body functions," he added
*** cyn-away is now known as cyndrekit
[ivan] That's brilliant. Men beat their wives because they refuse sex, so make giving sex required by law!
[badmash] genius indeed
[ivan] What about those of us who can't manage to get married?
[ivan] Aren't we entitled to sex?
[ivan] I should hope so.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] that would be sinful
[abu_zeqqzeqq] and against Allah (SWT)
[ivan] Well, in an abstract sense I would hope so.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] The penalty is stoning to death.
[ivan] I'm terribly afraid of sex, so I don't think it would matter if I were legally entitled to it.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] I suggest you substitute your sexual urges with the urge to pray...
[abu_zeqqzeqq] until you are married.
[ivan] Substitute the urges... How obvious!
*** badmash is now known as bc
[ivan] "Man, do I ever want some sex." "No. You want to pray instead." "Oh, OK."
[ivan] I think one of the secrets of Islam's success must be its keen grasp of psychology.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] Islam rules.
[ivan] No, kidding. Go Islam!
[ivan] woohoo
[abu_zeqqzeqq] you can deny it all you like, but it is the only religion truly in touch with human nature
[bc] county: http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=467
[ivan] Ignore the superfluous comma.
[bc] does that seem accurate to you?
[ivan] All of them =)
[ivan] thx
*** First_Incision is now known as fi-away
[ivan] I can't say, bc. I didn't read it.
[ivan] Should I?
[bc] Yes, you should
[ivan] Haha!
[abu_zeqqzeqq] http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_686841.html?
[ivan] It almost looks real.
[ivan] The one problem is that shoeboy is LOLing too much and Vladinator isn't doing it enough.
[bc] I'm kind of insulted. It represents me as a pathetic drunk with delusional fantasies that I'm liked by females, and that seems entirely untrue
[abu_zeqqzeqq] gratuituous kylie pictures. Proof Allah(SWT) and Mohammed (PBUH) are REAL
[ivan] It does seem entirely untrue that you're liked by females.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] bc at least you are worthy of parody
[bc] hehe
[abu_zeqqzeqq] some of us are become stalinesque non-persons.
[abu_zeqqzeqq] airbrushed out of trolling history
[ivan] abu and I didn't even get noticed
[bc] craig&osm&trollaxor prolly still like you, dmg
[ivan] "Where's the part where Barry Corrington slags on Jin Wicked for half an hour then kisses her ass when she logs in?
[ivan] "
[ivan] Has Jin ever been in here?
[bc] not afaik
*** abu_zeqqzeqq is now known as Abu_Zeqqzeqq
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] bc: don't lie
[bc] ?
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] "she" is here right now
[cyndrekit] oh my god this is hallarious
[bc] is she?!?
[ivan] Abu is Jin Wicked!
[ivan] I knew it.
[ivan] I always told you guys, but you wouldn't listen.
[bc] Abu has a UKian IP address
[bc] has Jin moved to UKia?
[ivan] Yeah, for better or worse, Jin is a real person.
[ivan] And she's not here.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] Jin is BC
[bc] I didn't see you there Jin. I just wanted you to know, I love your site
[ivan] She is one of those girls you've attracted, though, bc.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] everyone knows that
[ivan] Everyone is wrong.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] jin, stop playing around and attention seeking.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] you are fooling noone
[ivan] Right, everyone is fooling themself.
[bc]
[ivan] bc isn't Jin.
[ivan] bc isn't luisa, either.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] yeah, like I am going to believe a troll on #adequacy
[ivan] It's easy to spot bc's real alternate identities, because they're all exactly the same.
[ivan] UE talked exactly like LAT, who talked exactly like KTB, who talked exactly like HW.
[ivan] HW, with a Scottish accent!
[ivan] Well, that was quite the sight.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_691682.html?
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] The apartment where suicide pilot Mohammad Atta lived and plotted the September 11 attacks is to be turned into an "art happening
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] what about Paget-Paget ?
[ivan] Forgot about that one.
[bc] they were all subtly different
[bc] I can't help it if you have no reading skills
[ivan] HW constantly saying "realise" was the best.
*** Lumpen (guest@cloaked.sea1.dsl.speakeasy.net) has joined #adequacy
[bc] eh?
[ivan] Howdy, Lumpen.
[Lumpen] Hasn't the joke gone on long enough?
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] what joke ?
[ivan] Likely. Which joke, though?
[bc] what joke?
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] *BSD is dying ?
[Lumpen] The blank page
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] what blank page ?
*** cyndrekit is now known as cyn-away
[Lumpen] http://www.adequacy.org
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] thats not blank
[Lumpen] Looks blank to me.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] it is actually RGB value #D7D7D7
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] which is patented by adequacy.org
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] and if you wait long enough
[Lumpen] Yeah, yeah.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] you will see some content
[bc] no dmg, it is more
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] I assure you
[Lumpen] So how long do I have to wait?
[bc] the grey colour varies between values #D6D6D6 and #D8D8D8
[bc] encoding a binary string of information
[ivan] Nerd talk alert.
[Lumpen] I think two months is long enough pretending you're gone.
[bc] that holds the entire adequacy site, accessible to the chosen few
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] who is pretending ?
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] keeping a quality site like adequacy going was never easy
[Lumpen] Ha, ha, ha.
[Lumpen] Very funny.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] adequacy is dead. Fact.
[ivan] Well, unfortunately, Lumpen, the Adequacy editors were so damn lazy that even between the forty or fifty of them, they couldn't produce one article a week.
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] dead as BSD
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] ivan: I no longer work for free.
[ivan] Yeah, but do you work it for free?
[Abu_Zeqqzeqq] what ? speak English.
[momocrome] Towards More Powerful Porn: Psychology, CGI and Gradients of Stimulation
[momocrome] sound like a compelling article?
[momocrome] great!
[Lumpen] So Adequacy is just an irc channel now?
[ivan] Is it completed?
[momocrome] no
[momocrome] I just thought of it
[ivan] This channel shouldn't even be called #adequacy, really.
[momocrome] maybe I can use the QPT Editorial Service
[ivan] Mostly it's just bitching at, about, and by women.
[Lumpen] Because it isn't?
*** fi-away is now known as First_Incision
[First_Incision] I think adequacy is a great name for this channel
[First_Incision] Since it is now mostly about people contemplating their (in)adequacies
[ivan] Yeah, "people."
[ivan] Why don't you just say "ivan." We all knew what you meant, anyway.
The cd is a mixed mode cd, 2 sessions.
The first is standard cd-da format.
The second has the bandlink software - 2 mb.
There's an autorun that pops up saying "You must agree to this to listen to this cd"
However... when I open windows media player 8, select Play > Cd-audio, then the cd plays just like any other.
-- You can't give it, you can't even buy it, and you just don't get it!
Thank god they can't equip vinyls with copy protection. Stuff released on vinyls is better and sounds better... (well, in most of the cases. I dont want to summon a war "analog vs.digital". Several other people already did that ;))
The analog medium and transfer mechanism, albeit out-dated, is still my prefered method for listening to _good_ music (and NO! I'm not listening to classical music).
But... wait a second! They could equip every vinyl with a tiny microchip you have to put over a scanner unit to be allowed to play on you "digitally enhanced" turntable.
OMG!! O_O I found a new marketing idea....
"All you have to do is be fragile and grateful. So stay the underdog." Chuck Palahniuk, Choke
Whilst that's something that iptables/chains just can't cope with (sadly) I have Norton Internet Firewall, for my remaining Windows PC, which is application based. ie, you can accept/deny any connection for each application.
:-) )
I believe you refer to process name matching, which was added to iptables-1.2.7.
Of course, iptables doesn't have a pretty GUI interface like NIF, but there are plenty of people that have made front ends for it.
I don't like the approach much, as there are lots of ways for a programmer to get around it -- I mean, process name/(application name under Windows) is not some immutable thing, and worst case, the program copies itself to a file of a different name and executes itself.
I suppose if the OS's loader SHA-fingerprinted binaries at load time (expensive, but secure) and granted rights based on said SHAsum, you might manage to securely pull something off like this. Then said application couldn't support "components" or plugins, as MSIE unfortunately relies upon rather heavily. However, in general the "security" provided by NIF/ZA is pretty much an illusion, though it makes end users feel good. You really need lower-level OS support to build a "secure" environment like this.
Mostly, the point of NIF/ZA is to make the sort of people that read Maximum PC and impress people with their framerates in FPSes feel that their system is "secure".
No insult intended...(see "mostly"
May we never see th
perhaps you are just full of yourself and have a narrow view of the world where you are king shit and everyone else "just doesn't get it"? 99% of the time thats the case - especially with nerds.
There is a way to deal with this: Just pirate every track. Their policy encourages piracy.
Dedicated to teaching quality Trolling skillz
STEP 1 : Pick a story and search through for a highly-rated or otherwise prominent comment in which someone uses a nubmered list. For example, you want to find something like this:
EXAMPLE:
- Blah!
- Blah!
- Blah!
For example, I selected this post as a prime target. There are only a few things to keep in mind: pick an active story and a comment that'll be seen by a lot of people as the target of your troll. The comment MUST contain a numbered list, similar to the above, although the exact style of numbering can vary. Also, try to pick a comment that hasn't already been trolled this way. Every comment with a numbered list will eventually get hit, so you want to be quick.STEP 2 : Take careful note of the method of numbering that your target post is using. It really doesn't matter, as long as it's numbered. For example, in this post I use text like "STEP 1", "STEP 2", etc. Note this carefully. This method of trolling makes the most sense when the list is a list of ordered steps (such as this vary document you are reading), BUT if the numbered list is something different, such as "REASON 1:", "REASON 2:", etc., hit it anyway! Your troll will be more esoetric and non-sequitur, but all the better: trolling doesn't always HAVE to make sense. Sometimes it's fun to confuse people.
STEP 3 : Now you'll put the information gained from step 2 to good use, as you attack the target you selected. This is where it gets complicated, so pay attention. This is easiest to explain with a couple of examples. Let's say your target looks like this:
TARGET POST:
Now, to pull off your masterfult act of trollage, you'll want to sneak in, post a reply, and do this:
TROLL REPLY:
- 4. ???
- 5. PROFIT!
Let's say that the post you're replying to is a bit more complex:TARGET POST:
Reasons Linix is so great!
*REASON 1: My allowance won't cover expensive software.
*REASON 2: Completely off-topic rant about Microsoft.
*REASON 3: I love Linix!!
Now you want to come in and do this:
TROLL REPLY:
*REASON 4: ???
*REASON 5: PROFIT!
Note what I did there: I emulated the exact style of his numbered list, and then added to it in order to cleverly troll him. THAT is the key. If he numbers his list using bold, use bold. If your target uses all caps, use all caps. If he uses Roman Numerals, use Roman Numerals (hint: I II III IV V VI VII VII IX X, then everything repeats from there), etc. Make YOUR list seem like an naturally-flowing conclusion to your TARGET's list. Then give him HELL! Here's the general key:
TARGET POST:
...
1. Blah!
2. Blah!
3. Blah!
X. Blah!
TROLL REPLY
X+1. ???
X+2. PROFIT!
I know it gets complicated when you throw in the algebra, but you should be able to do it. Keep track of the numbers on a piece of paper if you have to. It's vary difficult, but once you try it out, you'll get the hang of it. It's an aquired skill that can only be improved through hard work and practice. So get out there and troll!
Here's a summary:
STEP 1 : Pick your target (active, contains numbered list)
STEP 2 : Gather information (style of the numbered list)
STEP 3 : Nail the target by adding on to his own list!
STEP 4 : ???
STEP 5 : PROFIT!
See, I even did it to my own damn list! That's how easy it is once you become a master at this discipline of trolling! Good luck, young Jedi!!! Go out and troll the world, you motherfucking cuntrag bitches!!
[momocrome] hmmc ion/categories/men/adventure/pages/classic1.htm :( :( :| :(/ 674/46#46 :(( :-( :-)3 368 :( :( ...3 466 :-)3 512. net) has joined #adequacy. net) has joined #adequacy :(i celess_reduced.jpg
[Sulla] I've had enough of subtlety, county
[dmg] hey tarque
[Sulla] I've had a long week
[dmg] you seem to be in belgium
[dmg] or is that brazil ?
[Sulla] isn't br brazil?
[dmg] i think so
[momocrome] microsoft MSN has parental controls with age-specific settings like 'preteen' and 'teen'.
[momocrome] it is like a menu system for pederasts
[momocrome] I guess it would work for the FBI just as well
[First_Incision] have you ever wondered who is the narc on #adequacy?
[momocrome] the two groups will be the only ones in the chatrooms marked 'safe'
[momocrome] certainly
[momocrome] it could be me!
[Mohammed_Iqbal] I WANT TO GO HOME!
*** Mohammed_Iqbal is now known as shoeboy
[shoeboy] I don't want to be at work anymore
[momocrome] take a deep breath
[momocrome] they are ripping on you in trolltalk, shoeboy
[momocrome] perhaps you can strike back and burn off a little steam
[dmg] #adequacy is not what it seems First Incision.
[dmg] You are dealing with powers that you cannot begin to comprehend.
[shoeboy] why should I care?
[Lumpen] Where is trolltalk?
[momocrome] I don't think you should 'care', per se, just a way to blow off steam I thought I'd suggest
[momocrome] http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721
[dmg] momocrome, that is top secret information.
[dmg] don't just spread it around like that.
[momocrome] gahsp!
[momocrome] my apologies. Lumpen, looks like you lucked out
[Lumpen] Oh. It's a slashdot thing. Blah.
[shoeboy] someone's been viewing my amazon.com user page
[shoeboy] hrm.. stockton's got 4 turnovers at the half
[shoeboy] fuck
[dmg] night all. Off to do some Top Secret MI6 work
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[shoeboy] oh yeah, some little nigger was ridiculing my shoes on the bus this morning
[shoeboy] that was obnoxious
[Sulla] what are your shoes like?
[shoeboy] New Ballance running shoes
[Sulla] trainers?
[shoeboy] yeah
[First_Incision] riding the bus, how communist
[Sulla] I don't blame him
[shoeboy] bah
[First_Incision] "trainers", there's a UKism for you.
[shoeboy] he was dressed like your typical urban black
[Sulla] anyone who wears trainers anywhere, though especially on a bus, deserves all they get
[First_Incision] they're sneakers, dammit. For sneaking up on the redcoats
[shoeboy] and looked like a clown college dropout
[Sulla] locally they get called sanshoes, FI, I actually thought I was using a USianism so you'd understand
[First_Incision] haha. I've actually never heard a non-UK person say trainers before.
[Lumpen] I call them "nigger boots."
[county] I think I'd just break down if some little nigger ridiculed my shoes.
[Sulla] you lot are acomplete disgrace
[county] Are we?
[First_Incision] somebody needs to ridicule my shoes. I deserve it.
[First_Incision] http://www.converse.com/shop/shop.asp?cat=sc
[county] I like my shoes.
[Sulla] Yes, county
[county] I wear black leather boots.
[First_Incision] My shoes are ugly as shit, but comfortable as heaven
[county] Mine look mighty sharp.
[Sulla] my shoes are black, leather, and constricting. They punish my feet, covering them in blisters and blood. I deserve it, though, and it is morally improving
*** Lumpen has quit IRC (Quit: Please turn www.adequacy.org back on!)
[county] Mine are similar, Sulla, but they don't draw blood.
*** Sulla is now known as bc
[county] Or cause blisters, really.
[county] They're stern, though.
[bc] mine really do
[bc] fucking agony, they are
[First_Incision] mine are like walking on pillows
[county] I've walked over five miles a day in mine without blisters, just soreness.
[county] When they were brand new, though, they caused blisters.
[county] I had to break them, though! And they had to break me.
[county] It was very sexual.
[bc] I do more than 5 miles usually, and by God, every step is pain
[bc] every step sends shockwaves of sheer agony around my foot and up my leg
[county] Why don't you get more comfortable shoes?
[bc] and after my ritual 5000 steps every day, I feel like a new man. I feel improved. I feel like the sin has been flushed out.
[bc] because I deserve the agony, county
[bc] I'm a bad fellow, and this is my self imposed cross
[First_Incision] http://www.panama-jack.com/havanajoe/INGLES/colec
[county] Anyway, I'm going to tell my story about female cruelty on the bus.
[bc] to bear
[county] I get on the bus with four other girls, three of them are together.
[county] I mean with four girls.
[First_Incision] I also have a pair of these that are 3 years old, I trust they will last my whole life.
[county] I'm a guy, of course. Heh.
[county] The lone girl tries to be friendly with the three, and they're quite terse and rude, and then when she gets off, they spend the next five minutes mocking her.
[county] It made me weep.
[bc] Yes. You'd never do something like that, of course.
[county] I wouldn't.
[county] She was quite pretty, too.
[county] Her face had a strange, intense look to it.
[bc] perhaps you should have recorded the conversation the girl had and slipped it into her pocket anonymously come monday
[bc] girl/girls
[county] Her voice and attitude were intoxicating in their simplicity and ingenuousness!
[county] And I will never see her again
[county] The other girls were ill-formed masses of pimpled, greasy, misshapen flesh.
[county] The soul truly is reflected in the face and body.
*** momocrome is now known as Yanni
[shoeboy] indeed
[bc] Fascinating county, but, considering that you have shown your capcity for malice here many times, I suspect that while you doubtless thought this girl pure and interesting, you in fact liked her because she was similar to yourself (the usual reason for attraction) - full of malice. I suspect the criticism of the other girls (who were likely good, and therefore opposed to you, and quite alien) was justified.
[shoeboy] this is why I can't wipe the smirk off my face no matter how hard I try
[county] I didn't see any reason to suppose this girl courted malice, bc.
[county] Anyway, I think it's been well-established that I can't take it, at all.
[county] I wouldn't be attracted to a cruel person.
* Yanni is the man for you, county
[county] Sorry, Yanni, I don't like fatties.
[Yanni] I will sooth your soul.
[Yanni] I am not fat!
[county] 225 lbs is pretty damn fat.
[Yanni] http://www.physics.drexel.edu/~kim/yanni.GIF
[bc] marry me?
[Yanni] I am intensely well muscled, by nature.
[Yanni] and at a firm 6'2", can hardly be counted amongst the fatties
[county] I'm 6'2", though.
[Yanni] you are a bean pole
[Yanni] 160 lbs?
[county] bc, I feel like such a wretched fool for not talking to this girl and getting rejected!
[county] No, more like 170-175.
[Yanni] hey, you guys want to know a secret?
[Yanni] Luisa is a man. a cowboy, no less.
[bc] The value of work is socially defined, and usually done so for the benefit of those in charge; those with the most power and influence. --Infinitera
[bc] Is he retarded????????
[county] No, he's correct.
[bc] Shut up.
[county] Also, I'd like to point out the Gun N' Roses is the best band ever.
[county] Would you hit it? http://www.cyborgasmatrix.com/
[First_Incision] that's anatomically correct? No, I would not hit it. Not even a real woman that looked like that.
[county] The face made me laugh.
[Yanni] be sure to visit the torso gallery
[county] I didn't get past the front page.
[county] I figured it couldn't get any better!
[Yanni] this is horrifying
[First_Incision] when's the Internet going to bring about the downfall of western civillization. It seems to be about time now.
[Yanni] Available
[Yanni] Now!
[Yanni] Torso with head starts at $920
[Yanni] no arms or legs with that
[county] Oh, no!
[county] It's wrong that they would sell that.
[county] The whole idea of a fake woman is ridiculous.
[Yanni] you can buy just the upper torso
[Yanni] $395 for breasts and shoulders only
[county] I wonder if they've had any takers at all.
[First_Incision] yes, county, that is why we are ridiculing it
[county] I can't imagine anyone would want it.
[Yanni] see MPG
[Yanni] video of breasts
[Yanni] being kneeded
[Yanni] 1.4 MB ]
[county] Frankly, I'm just not seeing a niche market between masturbation and actual women.
[county] Those two seem to have the demand pretty much satisfied.
[Yanni] perhaps it will become an appliance as common as a refrigerator or microwave oven
[county] For $920, you could have a girlfriend for a month or two.
[Yanni] reading into a little, these dolls talk, have articulated skeletons
[county] For $920, you could masturbate for decades!
[First_Incision] the e-conomy is all about inventing niche markets that don't exist.
[Yanni] $920 would get you 2 hours with a clean-ish whore
[county] For $920 I could buy a fancy hat that would get that wonderful bus girl to notice me.
[county] I'm having scads of fun falling in infatuation with girls from the bus. I hadn't anticipated this at all, but it's immensely enjoyable.
[Yanni] for $920 / month, you could afford a fancy enough car to get a bell town beauty
[county] Oh boy!
[Yanni] Final warning to Vladequacy. (Score:0)
[Yanni] by Anonymous Coward on 11-15-02 07:28 PM (#4683239)
[county] I hope that little feud doesn't end bloodlessly.
[First_Incision] 01,9904 01I hate it when I forget about dinner and get hungry late at night01,99
[county] Have some beans.
[First_Incision] I don't keep food stocked. I suppose I must go get some food from a local muslim late-nite eatery
[county] Why don't you keep food stocked?
[First_Incision] because I live off of fast food.
[county] Oh.
[Yanni] a med student
[Yanni] perhaps fat
[county] I buy a pre-prepared meal once each week.
[First_Incision] I have put on 15 pounds since I started.
[Yanni] Margeret Thatcher has ingested my semen. _five times_.
[county] Every Sunday, I purchase a gyro.
[First_Incision] I shall return with hommos
*** First_Incision (~First_Inc@66.168.225.239) has left #adequacy
[county] It seems that buying one's meals would get expensive.
[Yanni] (snicker). he said homos
[county] Do you have the Mrs. cook for you, Yanni?
[Yanni] mostly
[Yanni] i sometimes prefer to get a beef-based product though
[Yanni] she'll only do chicken if she's cooking for us
[county] Do you two ever compromise on pork?
[Yanni] Vladequacy
[Yanni] no. she doesn't like to eat mammals
[Yanni] trollaxor is gone berserk
[county] I don't eat much beef.
[county] Chicken and pork, mostly, and some lamb.
[shoeboy] cock!
[county] Don't eat much of that, no.
[shoeboy] sulla does
* shoeboy is going home
*** shoeboy has quit IRC (Quit: [BX] Tabardation - the inability to master use of the [Tab] key. See: retardati )
[wsl3] Jesus H Christ, what the fuck is going on in trolltalk???
[county] Why not read it and find out?
[Yanni] I am about to post a doozy
*** Yanni is now known as momocrome
[county] What's trolltalk's URL, by the way?
[momocrome] what would be a slick way of 'proclaiming a royal blacklist' for the phoneboy cabal?
[momocrome] http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721
[county] Tell them that Vladinator is now officially displeased with them.
[momocrome] I am coming at them as the rightful King of trolltalk
[bc] ha! I got 0ed
[momocrome] because years ago, I won the battle of the sids
[bc] my post is invisible
[momocrome]
[county] =)
[county] I 0ed you.
[wsl3] heh
[bc] bastard, county
[bc] unzero me!
[county] I can't!
[momocrome] bah!
[bc] why not?
[wsl3] Yeah, tell them that Vlad's going to unleash the full power of Vladiquacy on thier asses.
[momocrome] county is hardly the 'trusted user'! ! !
[wsl3] LOL
[county] Because your post deserved a 0.
[bc] why?
[wsl3] Why on earth did they lump you guys in with me anyway?
[county] Actually, momocrome, I have a quite famous account that's trusted.
[county] I'm just telling stories, bc
[wsl3] bc - url? I'll 5 it for ballance.
[county] I haven't 0 anything in ages.
[bc] http://www.kuro5hin.org/comments/2002/11/15/17928
[bc] there
[bc] invisible
[bc] I always get picked on
[county] You were trolled by infinitera?
[county] Oh man.
[bc] who 0ed me anyway, vlad?
[wsl3] bc - I don't know - I'm no longer TU it seems thanks to those assholes.
[bc] heh
[county] I stand stride the storm, untouched by it! I will never be robbed of trustedness!
[wsl3] I shall now have to start yet another k5 account with which to gain TU back.
[county] "astride"
*** First_Incision (~First_Inc@66.168.225.239) has joined #adequacy
[wsl3] Or rather, have Dave do it since I'm on K5 restriction.
[First_Incision] praise Allah, hommos!
[wsl3] So seriously, when did this bullshit "Vladiquacy" malarky start poping up?
[county] You're spelling it incorrectly, big guy.
[wsl3] Oh, Vladaquacy?
[wsl3] s/Vladiquacy/Vladaquacy then.
[momocrome] here, I will post my post
[county] That spelling still doesn't make sense.
[county] "Vladequacy" is the only reasonable spelling.
[momocrome] vladequacy
[county] I should know, too, for I am osm.
[wsl3] Well well well. Hello Phone Boy.
[momocrome] http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=468
[county] Hello, Vlad.
[wsl3] So it was you.
[momocrome] it will just get flooded off the page, judging by recent activity
[wsl3] Why?
[momocrome] but I have cast my lot
[wsl3] Sweet! You even posted it loged in!
[county] Why? Be more specific.
[momocrome] oh yes
[momocrome] I left you out of it
[momocrome] vlad,
[wsl3] Why did you do this? I don't recall ever even pissing you off directly. You've always been around, but we've never really bumped into one another so to speak.
[wsl3] momocrome: I'm talking to county actually.
[momocrome] bah
[momocrome] I know, and I think you are getting your chain pulled
[county] Vladinator, you're just really, really irritating. I don't know how else to put it.
[momocrome] if county is osm, I am spiralx
[wsl3] lol
[momocrome] corpus memento
[wsl3] hard to tell, he's on attbi and is cloaked (like me).
[wsl3] county: I'm not suprised that you would say that... That still doesn't prove you're OSM.
[county] Just like momocrome.
[momocrome] aww.
[wsl3] momo I know and can vouch for.
[county] I don't feel the need to prove anything. Anyway, why are you not surprised? Are you aware that most people find you extremely obnoxious?
[wsl3] county == qpt much more likely.
[wsl3] You sound like him/her/it anyway
[wsl3] momo - that was great.
[county] momocrome, you're getting hit on.
[momocrome] it is too weak
[momocrome] knee jerk
[momocrome] I have to go through the frozen lasagna in the oven. bbiab
[First_Incision] I like how Fox News doesn't respect Godwin's Law
[First_Incision] The INS is letting in illegal immigrants. They are following orders from Congress and the President. "Just like Nazi Germany"
[First_Incision] letting in immigrants, like Nazi Germany?
*** First_Incision (~First_Inc@66.168.225.239) has left #adequacy
[county] I really need to work up the courage to talk to one of these bus babes.
[county] They really are fantastic.
*** Sulla (gallus@modem-2446.porcupine.dialup.pol.co.uk) has joined #adequacy
[Sulla] blh
[county] In fact, entirely apart from the bus, I'm surrounded by babes, none of whom I talk to
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[county] What's wrong with me?
[Sulla] are you shy?
[county] I blame society.
[county] And bc.
[county] Am I shy.
[county] That's an interesting question.
[Sulla] I'm not in society?
[county] Yes and no, really.
[momocrome] ah, the real hit to my post has appeared
[county] I'm mostly just shy around women I'm attracted to.
[Sulla] so reserved rather than inhibited?
[wsl3] That latest one is too long to read...
[wsl3] We need something new in there already...
[wsl3] Hey, I know...
[wsl3]
[county] Generally, yes, Sulla.
[wsl3] Much better.
[county] And when I do talk to women I'm attracted to, I'm just biting and cutting.
[wsl3] http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=468
[county] Boy, do they have your number! ==] William Scott "Pinkrectum Floyd" Lockwood III
[wsl3] That was a dodge anyway - I've been very careful not to violate the terms of the agreement with that account.
[wsl3] It worked VERY well.
[momocrome] vlad, I'd bet you could get taco to release log data regarding these current posts
[wsl3] Nope.
[wsl3] Tried.
[wsl3] Was told they don't keep those details, and to talk to their lawyer.
[momocrome] write him again, just with the links
[momocrome] and say, look man. these are actual crimes
[momocrome] slander, harassment, etc
[momocrome] it will at least get taco into the mix
[momocrome] it would be fun to see him post to trolltalk again
[wsl3] Been there, done that. His only response was "I know it sucks, but they've done it to me too."
*** spectacular_events (pxxx@cloaked.mn.client2.attbi.com) has joined #adequacy
[wsl3] http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=468
*** Sulla has quit IRC (Quit: bed)
*** spectacular_events is now known as yap
[yap] can i spill some rap in here
[wsl3] sURE
[wsl3] Why not?
[yap] maybe later
[yap] im thinking i should read up on a subject
[yap] to impress people i will meet
[yap] in the future
[wsl3] taxonomy.
[wsl3] That's a good one.
[yap] hold on
[yap] httP://www.yourdictionary.com
[wsl3] bbiab
* wsl3 &
[yap] och
*** First_Incision (~First_Inc@66.168.225.239) has joined #adequacy
*** sleeep (~happy@dialup-65.59.59.170.Dial1.Houston1.Level3
*** sleeep is now known as luisa|||
[First_Incision] luisa awakens?
[luisa|||] no.
[county] Enter the luisa.
[First_Incision] this commercial really makes me want to go to Bermuda. It's truly effective advertising.
*** yap has quit IRC (Connection reset by peer)
[momocrome] county, so harsh!
*** sleepingurl (~happy@dialup-65.59.56.220.Dial1.Houston1.Level3
*** luisa||| has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 300 seconds)
[First_Incision] Edmund Hilary? Pitching SUVs?
[county] Harsh, momocrome? When? How?
[momocrome] coy?
[momocrome] i see how it is!
[momocrome] you are the only person who knows I might have used to have a mustqang automobile!
[county] I'm really confused!
[momocrome] of course I realize it isn't a mustqang
[momocrome] and I suppose you aren't the only person
[county] I don't have any idea what you're talking about
[momocrome] there is a mean post in trolltalk telling me to 'go peel out in your mustang and shut the fuck up'
[momocrome] and I was being so nice.
[county] Oh.
[county] That isn't me.
[momocrome] of course
[county] However, I get the feeling that someone who hangs out in here is being nasty in trolltalk.
[momocrome] I was just hoping to drag this silly drama into slashnet. or not.
[county] I take out all my aggression on on darling little luisa.
[momocrome] it must be 70% or em!
[momocrome] you guys please don't suck like that. thanks in advance.
[momocrome] oh dear. If I am going to play in trolltalk, drink and chat in here, I really aught to pick only two.
[sleepingurl] drinking is silly
[momocrome] my apologies
*** sleepingurl is now known as luisa||||
[county] Drinking is essential.
[luisa||||] i wish i hadn't gotten home so late
[county] Why?
[luisa||||] now i can't go out carousing
[county] What were you out doing before?
[luisa||||] hanging out at a friend's house
[First_Incision] haha, I'm watching a thing on police snipers. They are shooting at baloons pulled by remote control toy trucks
[county] I am engaging in mental and emotional flagellation.
[luisa||||] my brother's in jail
[county] For what?
[luisa||||] which means he is unemployed again
[First_Incision] luisa||||: seriously? what did he do, or what is he acused of?
[luisa||||] he had a warrant
[county] If he would just go to prison, he could have a job making license plates.
[luisa||||] because he was stupid and failed to sort a prior ticket
[momocrome] a warrant for love.
[luisa||||] nah, it was a moving violation, not criminal stuff
[luisa||||] that's what makes it so stupid
[First_Incision] but failure to appear in court?
[luisa||||] yeah, but they took their time issuing the warrant
[luisa||||] like months
[First_Incision] yeah, it's an overworked/overcrowded system
[luisa||||] so he figured he could coast until he saved enough to pay it off
[luisa||||] no, small towns are slow to issue, big cities are quick to
[First_Incision] do you live with your brother?
[luisa||||] god, no
[luisa||||] i moved out last month
[First_Incision] ok
[First_Incision] are they gonna set a bail?
[First_Incision] I could see luisa|||| getting a romantic involvement with a bounty hunter from all of this. It would make a good movie.
[luisa||||] haha
[luisa||||] most bounty hunters are not Extremely Attractive
[First_Incision] I've never known any
[county] I happen to hunt bounties.
[luisa||||] stop lying
[First_Incision] his lies are always worth telling
[luisa||||] haha
[First_Incision] heh, secret service snipers shooting at grassy knolls
[luisa||||] christ i'm hungry
[First_Incision] you should visit your local all-nite muslim eatery, and get some hommos. It worked for me.
[luisa||||] hummus, darling
[luisa||||] and the nearby all night ethnic place is greek here
[luisa||||] so it would be gyros
[First_Incision] that's how they spell it on the menu at my local restaurant. I think Usamah has taught us that u's and o's are the same thing
[county] I'll post your brother's bail, luisa, if you'll make me something with lamb while wearing a too-short skirt.
[county] Deal?
[luisa||||] i would do that for no charge whatsoever
[First_Incision] hey, you're Texan. I'll post his bail if you introduce me to a Bush daughter
[luisa||||] hahaha
[luisa||||] those girls are hard-drinking hussies
[luisa||||] whatever would you want with them?
[county] First_Incision needs a hard-drinking hussy.
[First_Incision] Republican beeotches. Irresistable
[luisa||||] heheh
[First_Incision] They have political connections!
[First_Incision] "Meeting the parents" would entail meeting the most powerful man in the world!
[luisa||||] uh, he's a figurehead
[county] For who?
[county] Please don't say the Illuminati.
[First_Incision] and that's a reason not to date his daughter?
[county] Are his daughters attractive?
[First_Incision] The Illuminati are irrelavant. It's all Al Quaeda now.
[First_Incision] county: yes.
[county] The more vowels that can be included in the spelling of "Al Quaeiedaa," the better, I say.
[First_Incision] http://www.newsrebel.com/Images/bush_daughters_pr
[First_Incision] Al Quaeda is the real-life world conspiracy.
[county] Is that them?
[county] They look drunk.
[First_Incision] yeah
[First_Incision] they are always drunk.
[county] I don't find hard-drinking women appealing.
[momocrome] those girls have caused untold suffering and terror?
[First_Incision] I find it reassuring that when Western Civilization finally implodes, it will be replaced by a global Caliphate, and not some lame Asian thing.
[First_Incision] or, E. Asian, I should say.
[momocrome] I think China is in the lead
[momocrome] they just hired a new guy to capitalize things
[First_Incision] China=COMMUNISM. There's no way.
[momocrome] nope
[momocrome] Zemin just retired and they put an MBA in place
is that pesky thing still around? Short of locking myself in a cage, I honestly cannot escape every trap that exists to try and take it.
Not an Anonymous Coward, just tired of all those annoying registration forms
...
I think I'll Copyright the contents of my hard drive, then I can sue their asses for copyright infringement.
They can tell who you call on the phone, where you travel (and with a bit of deduction who you might be visiting and what you might be doing there).
So what?
Time for a new job. Are they going to hire you? Better check you out first.
You like (insert anything-but-vanilla-heterosexual-paraphilia here). Strike one. You go to the wrong church. Tsk Tsk. You enjoy wilderness snowboarding - risky sport that, might result in you being injured and not able to work. Uh oh. You take prescription X - an indication of icky chronic disease. Hmmmm Your grocery card indicates you eat too much unhealthy food. Hmmm again. Your grocery card indicates you drink too much alcohol. Snort. Your email indicates an affinity for the Republican party. Democrats only welcome here You seem to be a linux user. We're a microsoft shop here. Looks like travel to Rainbow Gathering here. No hippies wanted. Gnutella usage indicated. We support the RIAA in every possible way.
Maybe some of the information is about things that are protected (religion, say). But someone can always point to something else in the list and say that that was the crucial bit of information.
Or it might not even be your possible new boss, but the health insurance providers who are going to set wonderfully high rates for you (that broken leg after climbing in the 'Gunks cost a whole lot of money remember).
Small pieces of information might by themselves indicate little, but aggregate them and focus your attention on one or a few people and all kinds of information can be deduced. Accurately. Or Not So Accurately. That may not matter after the fact. This is (I'd bet) the basis for that DARPA Information Awareness Thinggummy.
You're in luck, because I've obtained a rare and wonderful bit of trolling history: complete e-mail logs of the K22320inchfan mailing list! Yes, that's right: when Scott Lockwood's inanity forced the elite of the Slashdot trollers (who later went on to form the popular and controversial news site Adequacy.org) off of their hidden sids, they migrated to a secret mailing list known as K22320inchfan, behind closed doors, where they conducted their trolling out of the public eye. The general public has never been privy to these secret machinations: until now!!!
Yes, that's right, ladies and gentlemen! In the vary near future, the entire e-mail history of the K22320inchfan mailing list will be posted to the teh Intarweb and revealed to the world! The secrets of the elite trollers will finally be available to the common man, and to evaryone else!
Features include:
Over 8 megabytes of text!
Over 3000 messages!
Secrets you won't find anywhere else!
The true identities of all your Adequacy favorites!
Learn where they live, work, and play!
Learn who they like, and who they hate!
Totally raw and uncensored!
???
PROFIT!!
;). If someone had created a 'KTB' character on k5 before I had, I would probably have been annoyed, but only because I may want to extend the character, insofar as I have developed it, onto k5 as well. The thing is, *I* am not really on the internet much at all. It seems that Siggy is, though, from what I can tell. He seems to be really into writing those torrid diaries, and exploring rather private parts of his personality in the most public of places - such as his sexuality, as 'Going For -100 Karma' publicised on /. If he really is exposing his true self to the k5 audience, this may be why he has become so defensive about the 'Bojay Iverson' thing - I would certainly be in a panic in his situation, if I thought the online world could reach into the real world and give me a kicking. I don't think I'll ever write diaries on k5, or if I do, they won't be about me, thats for sure. It freaks me out a little how easy it is to get information about someone on the internet, and the last thing I want want is an online diary, that will never expire, being accessible to all and sundry. I don't know, I just find the idea of posting your personal thoughts for all the world to see rather strange, if not a little ;)
2 0/21124/277&cid=4#4
All this, and more, will be available to you soon online, as part of the most revolutionary project in the history of trolling. Learn all the secrets that Vladequacy does not want you to know. All 3000+ messages are coming your way soon!
Here's a preview!
* * * *
From: Barry Corrigan <barry@bjcorrigan.fsnet.co.uk>
To: k22320inchfan@lists.io.com
Subject: Re: [k22320inchfan] talk about smoking crack...
Date sent: Fri, 22 Dec 2000 07:41:16 +0000
Send reply to: k22320inchfan@lists.io.com
I find it interesting that it is possible to extend your ego to the internet to the degree that siggy seems to have done. I haven't used the
internet for very long (thats the UK for you), but I can certainly see how its possible to end up actually caring about some online persona.
Personally, I don't give a shit, but thats because I don't have an online persona that is actually me (does this post negate that? I'm not telling you
creepy. Perhaps its a Britain-America thing, I've heard that Americans are not shy, in fact sometimes I think they have never heard of the concept of embarrassment. So there you go
Sorry for this bollocks.
On Fri, 22 Dec 2000, you wrote:
> Hi. I couldn't stay away, so I scrounged up some 'net
> access. Hi.
>
> I was talking with rusty indirectly about this, last
> night. He was asking me why I wanted k5 Anne Marie's
> nick -- that is, why I wanted to carry that "slashdot
> baggage" over with me to k5, the same way siggy did.
> It's funny, that way. I wanted k5 Anne Marie because
> it's a lovely character troll of mine. Siggy wanted
> "Signal 11" because it's the only way he's ever gotten
> a lot of (any) attention. He's afraid to be just
> Bojay Iverson, and it really comes across.
>
> --- Barry Corrigan
> wrote:
> >
> > Wow. I think I understand now why everyone seems to
> > dislike Signal 11 so much.
> > I mean, that has to be one of the most arrogant
> > things I've read, ohhh, all
> > week!
> > It was also extremely funny. Does he think he is an
> > internet celebrity or
> > something? In that post he came across as a jaded
> > Hollywood star.
> > Oh well, back to the horribleness of Java...
> >
> >
> >
> > On Fri, 22 Dec 2000, you wrote:
> > >
> >
> http://www.kuro5hin.org/?op=comments&sid=2000/12/
> > >
> > > "Most of the best trolls on slashdot, I suspect,
> > were inspired by me. "
> > >
> > > i actually feel sorry for the guy. he needs some
> attention.
The chase is better the the catch.
.. Everybody!! .. C'mon!! Together!!
Transforming the tunes we need your support
if you've got the breath back.
It's the first page of the second chapter!
I want you back for the rhythm-attack coming down on the floor like a maniac.
I want you back for the rhythm-attack. Get down in full effect!
I want you back for the rhythm-attack coming down on the floor like a maniac.
I want you back so clean up the dish.
By the way, how much is the fish?!!
How much is the fish?!!
Here we go, here we go, here we go again!!
Yeeah!!
Sunshine in the air!!
We're breaking the rules. Ignore the machine.
You won't ever stop this.
The chase is better than the catch!
I want you back for the rhythm-attack coming down on the floor like a maniac.
I want you back for the rhythm-attack. Get down in full effect!
I want you back for the rhythm-attack coming down on the floor like a maniac.
I want you back so clean up the dish.
By the way, how much is the fish?!!
How much is the fish?!!
Yeeehaah!!
Sunshine in the air!!
C'mon!!!
Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na
Yeeaaah!!!
How much is the fish?!!
How much is the fish?!!
Yeeaaah!!!
C'mon, c'mon!! Aaaah!
Resurrection!
hum... define idiot?
Why Evil is Good
I hate victims. Victims are the albatross hung from the neck of society. The
term is not even acknowledged by any other species. I am certain if there are
intelligent beings elsewhere in the universe, they follow the strict principle
of Natural Selection. Only the Strong shall survive. Mankind cannot survive
as long as its virility is diluted by the weak.
Peace-and-Love hippies, retards, cripples, depressives, sickling, addicts
and whiners are all victims of one kind or another. Larger examples of victims
can also be found: the entire nations of Israel and Englund, for example, are
constantly victimized and/or whining about their lack of power in the world. In
fact, the entire continent of Europe is nothing but a festering sewer of whiners
and welfare states. If we, the strongest nation on Earth, had a decent Ruler,
the entire junk-heap of Eurotrash would be burned to create a cloud of such lethal
density it would waft over to Asia and take out the victims that were left over from
World War II. The great black column of suffocating smoke would rise high into the
atmosphere, reaching for the very edges of outer space - a giant, living monument
to our strength. The unviable ashes of the once living garbage would orbit the Earth,
forever reminding future generations of the price of weakness.
World War II. Probably the greatest single era in the history of the planet, barring
the time before Man and Man's distorted, unnatural philosophies of "common good" and
"protecting the innocent". The time of Germany and its rule by a man of great vision.
A man who saw the virtue of evil. Every single class of victim described above was
dealt with in the harshest possible manner. Most people focus on the genocidal aspect
of Hitler's activities but his vision was much wider, encompassing every brand of
weakling from ethnic victims to sexual deviants. Unfortunately the United States,
led by a cripple, had to involve our great military might on the wrong side of the
war. The least Roosevelt could have done was to allow Germany to finish raping
France and reduce Englund to rubble.
We paid for our mistake in World War II. We were punished for choosing the wrong
side in the Great War by a period of non-violent "Cold War". The term "Cold War"
itself is the mark of the true Beast: the peace lover. A true leader - a Ruler -
would have unleashed the full might of our nuclear arsenal upon every nation on the
Earth, banishing them forever to particles of glowing dust blowing through the winds
of history. And look what our lack of action has gotten us: A planet filled with
human garbage, eternal sufferers suckling from the breast of the Mighty.
It is beyond my comprehension. Not only am I forced to allow the weak to survive,
but I - we - are forced to subsidize their pathetic existence. Every cripple
creeping along the sidewalk. Every degenerate elderly woman with osteoporosis who
parks in the handicap parking spot. Every worthless, lazy hippy who cries for peace
and marches on a public university. Every sickling child perpetually hospitalized
because its fetid welfare mother smoked too many drugs during her pregnancy. Every
30 year old retard wiping its nose all over its Scooby Doo coloring book. Every
drunk little whore seeking "justice" in our courts for her rape. All of them,
and more, deserve nothing but death. In the Natural World, every single one of these
leeches would be lion fodder.
Even the "Good Book", the Bible - which is actually nothing more than the sick fantasies
of opium addicts - predicts the outcome of Nature: "The meek shall inherit the Earth".
Yes, I know what you're saying, but you are wrong. This phrase has been twisted by the
weak, the cripple, the Jew to give their pathetic lives some ray of hope. This phrase
does not mean that the Victim will Rule the world. That is laughable. That is impossible.
The meek shall inherit the Earth for the one and only reason that they will be buried in
it.
To the strong who have read this: Thank you. Together, we will conquer. To the weak who
will whine in the comments below: Your days are numbered, trash.
Dedicated to teaching quality Trolling skillz
STEP 1 : Pick a story and search through for a highly-rated or otherwise prominent comment in which someone uses a nubmered list. For example, you want to find something like this:
EXAMPLE:
- Blah!
- Blah!
- Blah!
For example, I selected this post as a prime target. There are only a few things to keep in mind: pick an active story and a comment that'll be seen by a lot of people as the target of your troll. The comment MUST contain a numbered list, similar to the above, although the exact style of numbering can vary. Also, try to pick a comment that hasn't already been trolled this way. Every comment with a numbered list will eventually get hit, so you want to be quick.STEP 2 : Take careful note of the method of numbering that your target post is using. It really doesn't matter, as long as it's numbered. For example, in this post I use text like "STEP 1", "STEP 2", etc. Note this carefully. This method of trolling makes the most sense when the list is a list of ordered steps (such as this vary document you are reading), BUT if the numbered list is something different, such as "REASON 1:", "REASON 2:", etc., hit it anyway! Your troll will be more esoetric and non-sequitur, but all the better: trolling doesn't always HAVE to make sense. Sometimes it's fun to confuse people.
STEP 3 : Now you'll put the information gained from step 2 to good use, as you attack the target you selected. This is where it gets complicated, so pay attention. This is easiest to explain with a couple of examples. Let's say your target looks like this:
TARGET POST:
Now, to pull off your masterfult act of trollage, you'll want to sneak in, post a reply, and do this:
TROLL REPLY:
- 4. ???
- 5. PROFIT!
Let's say that the post you're replying to is a bit more complex:TARGET POST:
Reasons Linix is so great!
*REASON 1: My allowance won't cover expensive software.
*REASON 2: Completely off-topic rant about Microsoft.
*REASON 3: I love Linix!!
Now you want to come in and do this:
TROLL REPLY:
*REASON 4: ???
*REASON 5: PROFIT!
Note what I did there: I emulated the exact style of his numbered list, and then added to it in order to cleverly troll him. THAT is the key. If he numbers his list using bold, use bold. If your target uses all caps, use all caps. If he uses Roman Numerals, use Roman Numerals (hint: I II III IV V VI VII VII IX X, then everything repeats from there), etc. Make YOUR list seem like an naturally-flowing conclusion to your TARGET's list. Then give him HELL! Here's the general key:
TARGET POST:
...
1. Blah!
2. Blah!
3. Blah!
X. Blah!
TROLL REPLY
X+1. ???
X+2. PROFIT!
I know it gets complicated when you throw in the algebra, but you should be able to do it. Keep track of the numbers on a piece of paper if you have to. It's vary difficult, but once you try it out, you'll get the hang of it. It's an aquired skill that can only be improved through hard work and practice. So get out there and troll!
Here's a summary:
STEP 1 : Pick your target (active, contains numbered list)
STEP 2 : Gather information (style of the numbered list)
STEP 3 : Nail the target by adding on to his own list!
STEP 4 : ???
STEP 5 : PROFIT!
See, I even did it to my own damn list! That's how easy it is once you become a master at this discipline of trolling! Good luck, young Jedi!!! Go out and troll the world, you motherfucking cuntrag bitches!!
LA VIE BOHEME
Restaurant Man: No please no, not tonight please no, mister - can't you go - not tonight - can't have a scene!
Roger: What?
Restaurant Man: Go, please go; You - hello, sir - I said, "No", Important customer!
Mark: What am I - just a blur?
Restaurant Man: You sit all night - you never buy!
Mark: That's a lie - that's a lie, I had a tea the other day
Restaurant Man: You couldn't pay!
Mark: Oh yeah.
Collins: Benjamin Coffin III -- here?
Restaurant Man: Oh no!
All: Wine and beer!
Maureen: The enemy of Avenue A. We'll stay.
Restaurant Man: Oiy vey!
Collins: What brings the mogul in his own mind to the Life Cafe?
Benny: I would like to propose a toast, to Maureen's noble try. It went well.
Maureen: Go to hell!
Benny: Was the yuppie scum stomped? Not counting the homeless, how many tickets weren't comped?
Roger: Why did Muffy --
Benny: Alison!
Roger: Miss the show?
Benny: There was a death in the family if you must know.
Angel: Who died?
Benny: Our Akita--
All: Evita!
Benny: Mimi - I'm surprised, a bright and charming girl like you, hangs out with these slackers, (who don't adhere to deals). They make fun - yet I'm the one attempting to do some good, or do you really want a neighborhood where people piss on your stoop every night? Bohemia, Bohemia is a fallacy in your head. This is Calcutta; Bohemia is dead.
Mark: Dearly beloved we gather here to say our goodbyes Here she lies, no one knew her worth, the late great daughter of mother earth, on this night when we celebrate the birth, in that little town of Bethlehem, we raise our glass - you bet your ass to - La vie Boheme
All: La vie Boheme, La vie Boheme, La vie Boheme, La vie Boheme.
Mark: To days of inspiration, playing hookey, making something out of nothing, the need to express - to communicate, to going against the grain, going insane, going mad. To loving tension, no pension, to more than one dimension, to starving for attention, hating convention, hating pretension, not to mention of course, hating dear old mom and dad! To riding your bike, midday past the three piece suits, to fruits - to no absolutes - to Absolut - to choice - to the Village Voice - to any passing fad!
Maureen: Is the equipment in a pyramid?
Joanne: It is, Maureen
Maureen: The mixer doesn't have a case. Don't give me that face!
Mr. Grey: Ahhemm.
Maureen: Hey Mister - she's my sister!
Restaurant Man: So that's five miso soup, four seaweed salad, three soy burger dinner, two tofu dog platter and one pasta with meatless balls.
Boy: Ugh!
Collins: It tastes the same
Mimi: If you close your eyes
Restaurant Man: And thirteen orders of fries. Is that it here?
All: Wine and beer!
Mimi & Angel: To hand-crafted beers made in local breweries, to yoga, to yogurt, to rice and beans and cheese, to leather, to dildos, to curry vindaloo, to huevos rancheros and Maya Angelou.
Maureen & Collins: Emotion, devotion, to causing a commotion. Creation, vacation--
Mark: Mucho masturbation!
Maureen & Collins: Compassion, to fashion, to passion when it's new
Various: To Sontag, to Sondheim, to anything taboo. Ginsberg, Dylan, Cunningham and Cage, Lenny Bruce, Langston Hughes, to the stage! To Uta, to Buddha, Pablo Neruda, too. Why Dorothy and Toto went over the rainbow to blow off Auntie Em. La vie Boheme!
Maureen: And wipe the speakers off before you pack!
Joanne: Yes, Maureen
Maureen: Well - hurry back!
Mr. Grey: Sisters?
Maureen: We're close.
Various: Brothers! Bisexuals, trisexuals, homo sapiens, carcinogens, hallucinogens, men, Pee Wee Herman, German wine, turpentine, Gertrude Stein, Antonioni, Bertolucci, Kurosawa, Carmina Burana. To apathy, to entropy, to empathy, ecstasy
Vaclav Havel - The Sex Pistols, 8BC, to no shame - never playing the Fame Game-- to marijuana! To sodomy, it's between God and me... to S & M.
Benny: Waiter...Waiter...Waiter
All: La vie Boheme!
Collins: In honor of the death of Bohemia an impromptu salon will commence immediately following dinner... Mimi Marquez, clad only in bubble wrap, will perform her famous lawn chair-handcuff dance to the sounds of iced tea being stirred.
Roger: Mark Cohen will preview his new documentary about his inability to hold an erection on high holy days.
Mark: Maureen Johnson, back from her spectacular one-night engagement at the eleventh street lot, will sing Mative American tribal chants backwards through her vocoder, while accompanying herself on the electric cello - which she has never studied.
Benny: Your new boyfriend doesn't know about us?
Mimi: There's nothing to know.
Benny: Don't you think that we should discuss --
Mimi: It was three months ago.
Benny: He doesn't act like he's with you.
Mimi: We're taking it slow.
Benny: Where is he now?
Mimi: He's right -- hmm. Where'd he go?
Mark: Roger will attempt to write a bittersweet, evocative song. That doesn't remind us of "Musetta's Waltz"
Collins: Angel Dumott Schunard will now model the latest fall fashions from Paris while accompanying herself on the 10 gallon plastic pickle tub.
Angel: And Collins will recount his exploits as an anarchist - including the successful reprogramming of the M.I.T. virtual reality equipment to self-destruct, as it broadcast the words: "Actual reality - Act Up - Fight AIDS"
Benny: Check!!
Mimi: Excuse me - did I do something wrong? I get invited - then ignored - all night long.
Roger: I've been trying - I'm not lying, no one's perfect. I've got baggage!
Mimi: Life's too short, babe, time is flying. I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine
Roger: I should tell you --
Mimi: I've got baggage too --
Roger: I should tell you --
Mimi: I got baggage too --
Roger: I should tell you --
Both: Baggage - wine --
Others: And beer!
Mimi: AZT break
Roger: You?
Mimi: Me. You?
Roger: Mimi...
The most important thing to bear in mind concerning idiots is this. Consider how dumb the median idiot is. Half of them are dumber than that.
Wh47 d1d j00 541, 31337 15n't t3h r0xor5 ne m0r3???
a good, old-fashioned boycott? Maybe you should tell your favorite band that although you like their music, you refuse to spend another dime on their latest hit until they force this shit off of their CDs. But what do I know?
Attach standard phone line to rear of CD player"
Hmm... why would my CD player need a phone line... oh well. *click*.
first
But I'm all for tracking people's CD usage. That allows companies to market more targetable CD's. Instead of producing CD's that people buy because they "heard" they were good, and then listened to only a few times before getting disgusted with it, it lets them find out what music people listen to over and over again.
-BrentThis isn't just limited to music CDs. I used to work for a company that did a lot of multimedia CDs for some very large clients, and this had to be the top requested feature. Everything from mom and pops to Fortune 100s wanted to see who was using their CDs and when. It's usually just done with an HTTP request (or multiple requests) and a little bit of XML data or something similar.
I would say this was on at least 50% of the CDs we produced.
About 3 or less percent of the computing public
on the average uses any firewall at all. Crooked
businesses know this.
Personally I feel that this kind of predatory data
mining is treacherous and should be illegal if it
is not already so. Bet these same folks just cover their CDs with 'FBI' warnings and dire threats in case their crap is copied even for fair
home use.
http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=4682 572 ;but i drunk.5 437m enu=news.weirdworld.sexlife :(
<bc> hehe
<bc> god I suck
<bc> hey FI
<First_Incision> I will not discout the possibility that you suck.
<bc> A wise move FI
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: if craig is as fucked up as he seemse
<abu_zeqqzeqq> that will push him to new extremes...
<bc> hehee
<First_Incision> I never understood the stone women thing. Is osm still perving around somewhere?
<momocrome> http://www.clusterlizard.org
<momocrome> osm's site ^^
<bc> yes, though who knows what he's up to
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc: change your nick to "Abu'l Hayjeh "
<momocrome> he has a bunch of uninspired match.com pseudo-trolls
<momocrome> picking on hapless, lonely women
<bc> that irc log is hilarious
<dmg> that takest the biscuit
<bc> [bc] vlad... i'2 type 'mo
<dmg> I laughed
<momocrome> post the text to 20721
<momocrome> stir the pot a bit
<momocrome> I am going to rise to their baiting
<momocrome> even thoughI haven't been singled out
<bc> haha
<bc> I must read more now
<bc> county: http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=467
<ivan> Ignore the superfluous comma.
<bc> does that seem accurate to you?
<ivan> All of them =)
<ivan> thx
*** First_Incision is now known as fi-away
<ivan> I can't say, bc. I didn't read it.
<ivan> Should I?
<bc> Yes, you should
<ivan> Haha!
<abu_zeqqzeqq> http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_686841.html?
<ivan> It almost looks real.
<ivan> The one problem is that shoeboy is LOLing too much and Vladinator isn't doing it enough.
<bc> I'm kind of insulted. It represents me as a pathetic drunk with delusional fantasies that I'm liked by females, and that seems entirely untrue
<abu_zeqqzeqq> gratuituous kylie pictures. Proof Allah(SWT) and Mohammed (PBUH) are REAL
<ivan> It does seem entirely untrue that you're liked by females.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> bc at least you are worthy of parody
<bc> hehe
<abu_zeqqzeqq> some of us are become stalinesque non-persons.
<abu_zeqqzeqq> airbrushed out of trolling history
<ivan> abu and I didn't even get noticed
<bc> craig&osm&trollaxor prolly still like you, dmg
<ivan> "Where's the part where Barry Corrington slags on Jin Wicked for half an hour then kisses her ass when she logs in?"
<ivan> Has Jin ever been in here?
The public has already gone along with it in a few areas-- the DVD CCA, for instance. An industry consortium (cartel) that sets the price and standards for content scrambling systems. I'm really suprised they haven't branched out their system to the audio industry yet, probably because research indicates consumers wouldn't buy all new equipment, or they would have done it by now. So instead, we have a few "DRM" type CDs that have come out recently but are backward compatible with home/car CD players and windows PCs. It would be much more convenient for the music industry to have a new format come along like DVD-Audio so they could start from scratch with the scrambling system as DVD did several years ago. What I see happening is that the music industry will encourage more sales of DVD players and drives so that gradually fewer and fewer regular CD drives will be sold, and people will be able to play CSS-encrypted CDs in their DVD players. A far cry indeed from the earliest days of CDs when a simple ISO "don't copy" flag on the disc was supposed to prevent people from ripping CDs to DAT in the mid 1980s.
I am waiting for the day when my toilet will tell the local store what I like to eat.
:(
Right now the only feedback I get from the toilet is when it backs up and spills on to the floor.
*** Sulla is now known as bc_dvd :) ;)1 115/168/2oxdj.html ... .. :\ :( :( :\ :-)e d_par.html :\ :\ :\ ... a little thick at timesi ctures/xxxpics/i ctures/xxxpics/4ladies/0208.jpgi ctures/xxxpics/BonkSeries/bonk054.jpgi ctures/xxxpics/BonkSeries/bonk070.jpg :( :( :\ :( ... ... do you like that format or this one: http://violate.me.uk/blog/ :( :(0 3653/05
[bc_dvd] bye
[momocrome] hi
*** cdromgurl has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 300 seconds)
[county] Hi and bye to all of you, as appropriate.
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*** ChanServ sets mode: +o cyndrekit
[county] cyndrekit, hello.
[cyndrekit] hello county
[cyndrekit] did bc actually get a dvd?
[cyndrekit] I am shocked.
[cyndrekit]
[county] I wonder what it is.
[me0w] Hello
[county] Greetings, me0w.
[me0w] Good day
[cyndrekit] hi hi
[em] http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&u=/02
[cyndrekit] is there a story to go with it?
[em] yes
[cyndrekit] oh cool, found it
[em] the photo is just too cool.
* momocrome moans
[momocrome] too much drunk for one night
[county] It's not night!
[me0w] Soon it will be.
[momocrome] oh last night's what I mean
[county] You didn't seem that drunk.
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[wsl3] Has anyone in here actually had a child?
*** Sylvain (~martinez@bombillo.Stanford.EDU) has joined #adequacy
*** ChanServ sets mode: +o Sylvain
[wsl3] Has anyone in here actually had a child?
[me0w] I have a cat
[me0w] She's kind of like a child.
[bc] hello!
[me0w] hi!
[bc] damn, missed cyn
[bc] that film was great
[county] What was it?
[bc] it was "Contact", county
[bc] I liked the way it explored revelatory experiences
[county] Have I mentioned that I've nursed an infatuation for Jodie Foster?
[bc] and scepticism as opposed to faith
[bc] you know what? I was just thinking about that
[county] About what?
[bc] I never really used to like her, because she seems quite sharp nosed and hard faced, in that way
[bc] but now, well, now I see. She seemed so vulnerable in that film
[county] I like well-defined faces.
[county] I can see why her's might be too sharp for you, though.
[bc] and you just wanted to protect her against the world
[momocrome] i hate kitten, but I am hung over and foggy headed
[bc] it is quite sharp, but I see beyond that now
[county] I like faces with character, not just formless fleshy masses, that so many other girls seem to have.
[county] Don't hate kitten, momocrome.
[county] There's no point.
[county] I just don't understand how he thinks he's different than the people he's always railing on.
[county] It's really funny, actually.
[bc] hehe
[bc] it's true, county
[bc] he constantly moans about people being "arrogant", or "narrow minded"
[county] I try to point it out now and then, but he just doesn't see it.
[bc] and you think "whaaa?"
[county] I think stouts are my favorite.
[bc] kitten is the most narrow minded & arrogant chap on the internet
[me0w] I am going out drinking tonight.
[county] One of my bus infatuations, the one who was being picked on, has a somewhat sharp face.
[county] Actually, I love her face.
[bc] I hope you have a voice of reason, me0w
[county] It's pretty, but not beautiful, by normal standards.
[county] But it just looks so carefully crafted, somehow.
[bc] is the sharp faced bus infatuation the same girl as the one with the limp?
[county] It looks like someone wanted her face to look just like that, and they invested endless time in carefully crafting it.
[county] You know what I mean?
[me0w] bc: I do, although this voice of reason is a little suspect
[county] (No, the limping girl is someone else, and she doesn't generally limp.)
[bc] why me0w, is this voice of reason American or something? I know you hate Americans. An American Voice of Reason would probably advice you to lick the most repugnant people in the room, as retaliation.
[bc] county: yes, I do know
[bc] interesting faces are nice
[county] When I see her, I want to hold her face in my hands and kiss it.
[county] But that's not a polite thing to do on a bus.
[county] You're wrong about us American's, bc. An American voice of reason wouldn't feel any ill will toward me0w, despite her hatred.
[bc] get to know her first, and do it later. Have her melt
[county] It would just feel sadness and hurt.
[county] "Americans"
[Sylvain] hey bc
[bc] county, my impression of Americans is that they are friendly and kind, and idealistic, but that if you cross them they take a just vengeance
[bc] hey em
[county] Cross us, yes. Simply hating us but doing nothing about it is not crossing us.
[bc] that seems fair enough
[bc] though who knows, me0w yank-hatred is such that it wouldn't surprise me to find she has crossed the line
[me0w] bc: this voice of reason has been my friend since HS, and on several occasions, while I was not quite in the right fram of mind, he got me to do silly things.
[county] It's mean and hurtful, yes, but that's not enough. We Americans only retaliate when actual harm is done.
[me0w] I do not have individual-yank hatred.
[county] I hope she hasn't crossed the line. America's wrath is great toward those who hurt her.
[bc] he sounds like a splendid chap, me0w. He should tell you to lick a lovely, yooung 16yo with lots of acne
[me0w] bc: He would tell me to go and make out with girls.
[bc] what?? That's only because he gets off on it himself, the weirdo perv
[county] Lesbian sex must be the least arousing thing in existence.
[bc] agreed, county, but I understand many chaps find it appealing
[county] But oh, man.
[county] This is nice.
[bc] generally ones with supressed homosexual urges themselves, I understand
[county] I have that warm, content feeling that comes with a few boozes and just finishing a delicious salami and pepper jack sandwich.
[bc] I want to have faith in something
[bc] I don't know what, but it seems to make people happy
[bc] so it must be worth a shot
[me0w] He likes to make me do these things and take pictures
[bc] he's sounding more&more sick
[county] What sort of things?
[me0w] He teases my SO with the pictures.
[county] I'm only asking so we can get a good idea of how sick he is.
[bc] "teases"? If I had a gf who french kissed girls in strange clubs, and a friend who took pictures of this and then showed them to me, I'd be jolly well angry, and likely explode in anger and start shouting at people
[bc] It takes all sorts, eh county
[county] I wouldn't want a girl that french kisses other girls.
[Sylvain] is it just me, or has this channel become too serious?
[county] This channel is a joke, Sylvain.
[bc] Sylvain, it's great. Since the regulars left, the channel has become more&more&more fun
[county] I like this channel. It's a lot of bullshit, a lot of heartfelt confession, and a lot of fighting.
[county] I can't think how it could be improved.
[bc] that's pretty much why I like it. What makes it tolerable is that a lot of the time, you can't really tell which is which
[county] For example, I quite like my online relationship with luisa.
[bc] serious? or bullshit? serious fight? bullshit fight? confession or or bullshit? fight? mixing it up to cause a fight? Who can tell.
[county] It's all fighting mixed with lies and truths.
[bc] I hope ubu has extensive logs of #kuro5hin
[bc] actually, do you, county?
[bc] going back a year or so?
[county] Well, I log whenever I'm in there.
[bc] I wish to find something
[county] I should point out that I've only been online for a month or so.
[bc] yes, but I understand you are friendly with someone who was here before, it was just on the offchance he gave you his logs
[county] Well, I have #k5 logs going back over a year, yes.
[bc] what size are they when zipped up would you guess?
[bc] nothing vast, right? not 50mb or something absurd?
*** dmg (~dmg@cloaked.in-addr.btopenworld.com) has joined #adequacy
[bc] hello dmg
[dmg] whassup bc
[Sylvain] hey dmg
[bc] not much
[dmg] hey sylvain
[bc] I just watched "contact" dmg, which has led me to believe I need faith in my life.
[county] I have a bit over 100mb of #k5 logs, bc.
[bc] em probably hates that film, for its inclusion of arecibo and the airbrushing out of native 'Ricans, only mentioned in passing for their superstitious beliefs about the telescope
[bc] crap, that's loads county
[bc] bugger it
[dmg] contact ? Is that with whatshername from silence of th e lambs
[Sylvain] superstitious beliefs indeed
[bc] yes dmg
[dmg] I dont like her voice
[Sylvain] the visiting scientists don't leave ALL that much money as they think
[county] Silence, dmg.
[county] She is my infatuation of the moment.
[bc] yes. She was mine first though
[bc] I spent the film marvelling at her vulnerability
[county] I liked her before you watched the film, bastard!
[dmg] you would like "the accused" then...
[dmg] she is more vulnerable in that.
[dmg] I just cannot stand her voice
[bc] She only came to my notice during the film, really. She fits the archetype that I like in women, so it can be said that I have always liked her, as long as I have been alive.
[dmg] eurrgh
[county] Her voice, or her accent?
[dmg] her voive
[dmg] voice
[dmg] it just annoysh me
[county] I never found it annoying.
[county] hmm.
[dmg] itsh sho annoying
[bc] I like it. It seems to have a nice burr
[me0w] My SO's drunken sister keeps messaging me. =/
[bc] she's like a female sean connery
[dmg] bc: exactly
[dmg] she shertainly ish
[bc] me0w, give her my aim and tell her to msg me
[county] Have her msg me.
[bc] I think I'd enjoy talking to a drunken woman!
[me0w] bc: She is on Y!
[dmg] get her on #adequacy
[county] I want a drunk girl to torment.
[county] ARGH
[bc] that's okay, I'm on yahoo too me0w
[me0w] I don't think she knows how to irc.
[county] I WANT A DRUNK GIRL TO TORMENT SO MUCH
[me0w] She does use that horrible habbo hotel junk
[county] Huh?
[bc] trillian just connected me to aim, yahoo, msn and icq. Now tell her to msg me! My ID on yahoo is tinyp3a. DO IT.
[bc] I WANT TO TORMENT COUNTY SO MUCH
[county] ]:(
[me0w] Be nice
[county] I am a fragile angel.
[me0w] she is my future sister-in-law
[bc] I'm always nice
[dmg] trillian can connect to msn ?
[dmg] wow!
[dmg] I never realised that.
[county] bc steals every woman I want.
[county] Every one
[me0w] bc, I gave her your id
[bc] wow!
[bc] she really is drunk
[Sylvain] paste example
[dmg] bc is from www.girlfriendstealers.com
[county] dmg, he did steal my girlfriend.
[county] Actually.
[dmg] http://www.girlfriendstealer.com/
[bc] [censored]: helloo?1
[bc] tinyp3a: hello!
[bc] [censored]: howw s u?
[county] I can't believe I forgave him for that.
[me0w] bc, please keep in mind that she is only 17
[dmg] women come and go.
[county] dmg, I loved her!
[county] And bc stole her
[dmg] those are the breaks.
[dmg] bc is irresistible to women.
[dmg] he is like Sam Sloan in that respect
* Sylvain looks at a list of ebay sections, notices "charity"
[county] Yeah. And when I cut his hands and feet of, burn his face off with acide, and leave him to die, those will be the breaks, eh?
[dmg] well yes.
[county] "acid"
[dmg] bc takes full responsibility for his actions.
[bc] [censored]: LoL AWW U SHOULDA!!
[dmg] he is an anarcho-capitalist libertarian
* bc ROFL
[dmg] who was this woman anyway ?
[dmg] she cannot have been in love with you if she let bc steal her away
[county] me0w's SO's sister.
[bc] county, I asked to speak to her first
[bc] so I didn't steal her at all
[bc] she is verrry drunk
[county] I thought of it first, bc, but my intoxication is slowing down my typing.
[Sylvain] bc: i don't think that will appease county's perception of entitledness.
[county] Ask her for naked pictures of Jin Wicked, bc.
[dmg] I have some of those
[county] Yeah? Lucky you.
[dmg] she keeps crapflooding my mailbox with them
[dmg] attention-seeker.
[county] She's a pain, in that respect.
[county] And every other respect.
[dmg] its like,
[county] With no respect.
[dmg] stop spamming me with nude photos.
[dmg] If I wanted to see that sort of thing I would get a girlfriend.
[county] I want to see it, and I can't get a girlfriend.
[county] You're attractive, confident, and wordly.
[Sylvain] dmg: you'd get a girlfriend to see nude *photos*?
[county] I'm a geeky pud.
[dmg] no if I wanted to see nude women
[dmg] Id get a girlfriend
[county] Or you'd just sleep around. Slut.
[dmg] aha the old double standard
[county] Not all nude women were created equal, though.
[dmg] we are all equal in the eyes of Allah (SWT) apart from the Infidels
*** dmg is now known as Abu_Nidal
[county] There's only one girl I want to see naked, actually.
[bc] damn
[bc] she's too drunk to realise that when I say I'm living under a glacier, I'm joking
* me0w giggles
*** Abu_Nidal is now known as dmg
[dmg] Scotland is an icy barren wasteland though, bc
[me0w] time for showering
[dmg] she could be forgiven
[Sylvain] bc maybe that's not drunkenness.
[bc] also, she speaks like a black Londoner with hyper estuary english
[Sylvain] it's perhaps stupidity augmented by adolescence and drunkenness.
[dmg] hold on one moment. if she is 17 and drunk, is she not guilty of an offence ????
[Sylvain] nope.
[dmg] Should not we be reporting her to the authorities
[dmg] ???
[dmg] or the person who supplied the alcohol
[bc] LOL
[Sylvain] somebody else is
[dmg] In the UK the alcohol age is 5
[dmg] for consumption in the home
[county] You must be kidding.
[dmg] how enlightened compared to our other stupid laws.
[dmg] no, its 5
[dmg] seriously
[county] Why have an age at all?
[dmg] Ill find a web page if I can to PROVE it
[county] Yeah, because web pages are always right!
[bc] she's away now
[bc] [censored]: BywebYE!!
[bc] which is sort of a relief
[bc] hehe
[county] I bet you got lots of fantastic drunken cybersex ]:(
[bc] don't be revolting county
[bc] I am a people person
[dmg] http://www.icap.org/pdf/report4updated.pdf
[bc] people interest me, and I like to find out all about them
[bc] there is no other motivation
[county] I'm not going to try to read through a pdf in this condition.
[dmg] one moment
[dmg] fucking cut-n-paste doesn't work
[county] I think I'd like another salami sandwish
[dmg] In bars and off-licensed premises the MDA and MPA are 18. The MPA for
[dmg] beer and cider is 16 when purchased for consumption with meals
[dmg] (except when in a bar). Children over five may consume alcoholic
[dmg] beverages at home with their parent's consent.
[bc] pdf sucks
[dmg] basically if you have cool parents you can get pissed once you start infant school
[dmg] but if you are over 18 and want to drink after 11pm, you are shit out of luck
[dmg] its a contradiction to be sure...
[Sylvain] there are some exceptions to alcohol laws here in USia IIRC
[Sylvain] e.g. it's allowed to give a child some wine if required by a religious ritual
[dmg] * In 19 states alcohol consumption by youth under 21 is not specifically
[dmg] illegal.
[dmg] ** Exceptions to the 21 law in some states include possession for
[dmg] religious purposes when accompanied by a parent, spouse or legal
[dmg] guardian; medical reasons; in private clubs or establishments; in the
[dmg] course of lawful employment by a duly licensed manufac
[Sylvain] e.g. catholic communion frequently involves a bit of wine.
[bc] I remember when I first got drunk
[bc] I thought "I want to spend the rest of my days in this condition"
[bc] it was a revelation
[bc] I think I have found my faith already
[dmg] I was about four when I first got drunk. on Babycham believe it or not. My mum did not realise it was alcoholic
*** Sylvain changes topic to '[ bc] I remember when I first got drunk || [ bc] I thought "I want to spend the rest of my days in this condition"'
[bc] I had a good swig of scotdch when I was 6 months old and got drunk
[bc] that was quite impressive. I saw the glass of double scotch, grasped it in two hands, and swigged it right down
[bc] well, I can't in truth remember if it got be drunk, or anything about it at all, but I'm sure it must've
[dmg] thats pretty funny
[dmg] you could have died however.
[Sylvain] he wouldn't have understood it.
[bc] nah, I took it like a baby
[Sylvain] no trauma for him
[Sylvain] what's the problem with dying when you're a perfectly innocent being?
[Sylvain] it's only when we grow old and come to appreciate that life is valuable that we have a problem with it
[county] I am a perfectly innocent being.
[dmg] what about original sin ?
[Sylvain] 16:31 [ county] I WANT A DRUNK GIRL TO TORMENT SO MUCH
[bc] you'll note he didn't actually do it, em
[bc] county has control of his desires
[county] I actually don't even think I wrote that.
* Sylvain sings: Nwel a rive pou nou pa pedi lespwa nou!
[county] The wind has really picked up here.
[county] It's almost violent.
[dmg] im going to bed
[dmg] its past my bedtime
* bc bought a bottle of Appleston Estate 40 year old today,Sylvain
[dmg] bloody IRC
[bc] night dmg!
[dmg] night night everyone
*** dmg has quit IRC (Quit: Trillian (http://www.ceruleanstudios.com))
[county] What's that, bc?
[Sylvain] bc: wow.
[bc] it's an excellent rum
[Sylvain] how much was it?
[bc] a bloody fortune
[Sylvain] fuck. the oldest rum i've ever had is 12 years.
[county] Ah, a rum.
[Sylvain] any words on how good it is beyond "excellent"?
[county] The oldest rum I've had was also 12 years.
[bc] it tastes nice. Older rums seem to become more whiskyish, somehow, it is hard to explain
[bc] much more complex
[county] Now you just need some forty year old coke.
[bc] it is aged in the tropics, too
[bc] apparantly that means it ages more rapidly
[bc] at about 3x the rate of a spirit aged in, say, canada
[bc] anyway, I don't know. It tastes very nutty, somehow
[Sylvain] but how expensive was it?
[bc] em: £10,000
[bc] http://www.canoe.ca/LifewiseFoodWine01/0314_winew
[Sylvain] yeah, right, like you have 15,795.99 USD
[bc]
[bc] it's really nice with coke though!
*** Sylvain sets mode: +b *!*gallus@*.orangutan.dialup.pol.co.uk
*** bc was kicked by Sylvain (Trolling is strictly forbidden in this channel.)
*** Sylvain sets mode: -b *!*gallus@*.orangutan.dialup.pol.co.uk
*** bc (gallus@modem-1926.orangutan.dialup.pol.co.uk) has joined #adequacy
*** ChanServ sets mode: +o bc
[bc]
[bc] wouldn't that be lovely though?
*** iat (iat@cloaked.bear.dialup.pol.co.uk) has joined #adequacy
*** ChanServ sets mode: +o iat
[bc] I'd be scared to drink it
[bc] hey iat!
[iat] hey bc
[iat] whassup bc?
[bc] not much
[bc] how's the online dating scene going? =)
[iat] i finally got rid of my woman. she came to get rid of her shit from my flat this evening. i'm getting pissed and then tomorrow im gonna get on with my life
* county sighs
[bc] dmg was telling me about it, er, your troubles with her
* county weeps
[iat] dmg said you're coming to london next month
[iat] heh, someone gave her rohypnol last night!
[county] That's horrible.
[iat] i don't know who would be fucked up enough to waste good rohypnol on her
[bc] did he? He's wrong. I was going to, but something disastrous happened. I may come in January, but not december, that's been off for ages due to commitments
[iat] bah, we all want to meet you
[iat] what did dmg say about me/it/her?
[bc] hehe. I'll come down sooner or later
[bc] he was talking about how you met her on match.com (!)
[bc] which reminds me, I have to search march.com insanely to find her
[iat] yeah, it's either that or start fucking my secretary. i saw it as the lesser of two evils
[me0w] bc, And how was she?
[bc] there really can't be that many overweight, red headed, goth girls from london on mach.com
[iat] you'd be surprised
[county] No more than twenty or so, I'd guess.
[bc] me0w: very drunk. Spoke in estuary english. Seemed good natured though, through the disgraceful mists of her underage drinking
[iat] btw, you forgot moustachiod
[iat] otoh, there are no biologists with pds living in edinburgh on match
[bc]
[county] Why on earth did you even have anything to do with her, iat?
[bc] I found one I liked on match.com
[me0w] bc, She is a nice girl
[iat] county: i wanted to get my redhead fetish out of the way
[bc] but I'm not showing her to you iat, you'd steal her
[iat] i wasn;t sure if the "ginger pubes" thing was a liberal myth
[me0w] bc, I think there is a picture of her in my gallery
[iat] of course i'd steal her, i'm a stud
[bc] heh me0w. She seemed nice. Drunk for sure, drunk as a Lord, it was terrifically amusing
[me0w] bc, Unfortunately her typing doesn't get much better
[iat] bc: where's your bondage pr0n collection stored on aq?
[county] A stud? You seem like a poorer middle class fellow, somewhat on the ugly side.
[iat] upper middle class, only slightly ugly thank you
[iat] but, i am hung like a mouse
[iat] emr, moose
*** Sulla (gallus@modem-2093.python.dialup.pol.co.uk) has joined #adequacy
[Sulla] me0w, are you trying to say that she mayn't have been drunk at all, or was only tipsy, and that she isn't really too different when sober?
[Sulla] iat: I forget. I never look at it, and it isn't "my collection"
[me0w] bc, She was drunk.
[iat] whose collection is it then?
[me0w] bc, But when she is sober I often have a dificult time understanding what she is saying.
[Sulla] it is me0ws and I put it there cos perdida wanted it for some story relating to 80's bdsm pornography for her site
[me0w] bc, she likes to type in some sort of sms speak
[Sulla] hehe
[Sulla] that would explain whey she says "da" for "the"
[me0w] bc, ahaha you still have those pictures?
[iat] who is me0w anyway? there's all these new faces since i last frewuented #aq?
[Sulla] me0w yes, and embrassingly, someone posted the link into my diary and made all sorts of insinuations
[Sulla] mind you, since I've claimed to be a rapist on k5 before it isn't like I can sink much lower
*** bc has quit IRC (Ping timeout: 180 seconds)
[iat] anyway bc, you never told me where you keep it
[me0w] bc, and they weren't even good pictures
[Sulla] iat, me0w is this bird wot came here from #k5 who is quite nice and stuff, though canadian (french)
[county] Does me0w speak french?
[Sulla] iat, I'll look out the url
[iat] i work with a REAL french canadian, her mother's french and her father's canadian. she's never been near "french candian" territory
[county] Sulla, so you really do have a bondage porn collection?
[county] I thought that was myth.
[Sulla] http://www.adequacy.org/images/bc/violate.me.uk/p
[Sulla] it's not my fucking collection!
[Sulla] jesus H christ
[me0w] bc, you know, I've never actually looked at all of them
[county] Yeah, whatever.
[iat] it appears to be quite a copmorehensive collection bc
[Sulla] there are perfectly legitimate reasons the pics are there
[county] So you find this appealing, bc? http://www.adequacy.org/images/bc/violate.me.uk/p
[Sulla] me0w, neither have I
[Sulla] I just looked at some funny 80's ones
[me0w] bc, I looked at the ones that perdida pointed out
[Sulla] http://www.adequacy.org/images/bc/violate.me.uk/p
[Sulla] I'm sorry, that makes me laugh and laugh
[county] These are amusing and sexy at the same time. I love it!
[Sulla] anyway, when I can be bothered, I'll delete the whole lot
[me0w] bc, was there a series of hunchback pictures?
[Sulla] yes me0w
[Sulla] the "bonk" series
[Sulla] http://www.adequacy.org/images/bc/violate.me.uk/p
[Sulla] that's also pretty damned hilarious
[county] I'll give you $728 for all these pictures, Sulla.
[Sulla] some of them are funny, but all the rest are just crude and nasty
[Sulla] county, it's a deal!
*** Sulla is now known as bc
[county] Fantastic!
[bc] I love the leer on the guy's face
[bc] so cheesy
[me0w] county, I could just mail you the cd they came from
[bc] that's a nice offer, eh county? You should accept
[county] The truth is, I like nothing more than pictures of bound and tormented women.
[county] However, I prefer not to post my mailing address in the channel.
[bc] then msg it to me0w
[county] Msg? I don't know what you mean by that.
[bc] liar
[county] Oh, that hurts
[bc] iat has gone quite quiet since I posted the link, eh?
[bc] I wonder what he is doing?
[iat] heh
[me0w] Wanking?
[iat] smoking and drinking
[county] I'm wanking.
[county] How could I not?
[county] All these photographs of naked women tied up!
[county] It's paradise, from my perspective.
[iat] i love smoking
[iat] i just wish it didn't cost so much
[bc] I thought you were a health freak?
[iat] not these days
[bc] good move
[bc] welcome to the "cool set"
[iat] the pressures of work have turned me into a nicotine-fuelled anorexic
[county] I have never, ever smoked.
[county] I probably should.
[bc] you'd like it
[iat] i have never, ever smoked crack
[bc] everybody with an addictive personality should have many addictions
[county] I don't have an addictive personality.
[bc] You do. Oh god you do.
[bc] You are always looking for a hit
[county] Explain!
[county] I'm addicted to little.
[county] Just alcohol and that girl from work's ass.
[bc] you don't just talk to people. You have angles, you attack and duck and weave, you seek the high of torture and humiliation of others in everything you say
[county] No
[county] Not others, women.
[county] I only want to hurt females.
[county] Please keep that straight.
[bc] You do it to vlad often enough, phoneboy
[me0w] I dunno what to wear
[county] Oh, that's different.
[iat] bc: will you stop saying "humiliation"? the "iat" bit interrupts my mp3s by making acidmax make sounds
[bc] hehe, okay iat, I didn't realise I said humiliation so often
[county] My motivation for tormenting vlad is entriely different than my motivation for tormenting, say, luisa.
[bc] me0w, wear leather and stuff
[bc] I don't know
[county] me0w, dress chastly.
[county] It's incredibly sexy.
[bc] me0w, wear a denim skirt with a sort of white lacery around the pockets that looks lovely and homely, and a black t-shirt above that is slinky and just has strap things over the shoulders so it is more of a dress, really.
[bc] let your hair hang down forward over your bosom, to each side, following the contours perfectly
[me0w] bc, I don't own any denim skirts
[me0w] and I only have a leather corset
[bc] hmmmn
[county] I told you, me0w.
[iat] bc: what happened to your general knwoledge bot?
[county] Dress chastly.
[county] It will draw guys like you can't believe.
[bc] wear a turqoise top, that is very close fitting and very slightly see-through, revealing a white bra underneath on the edge of awareness, and making men think you are less calculating and more genuine than those other dolled up girls. Underneath, wear black trousers that are practical looking though ladylike, covered in pockets
*** iat sets mode: +o bc
[bc] iat: It's on my hard drive. I got bored with it and moved onto other things
[county] The white bra is a good idea.
[iat] what are you coding now, j00 1337 hax0r j00?
[me0w] bc, I don't own a turqoise top
[county] When I see a white bra, my instinct is to assume it was displayed on accident, becuause my tendancy is to feel white-bra-clad people are pure and innocent.
[me0w] and I don't know if I have a white bra
[county] ]:(
[me0w] wait wait
[me0w] I found a white bra
[bc] I'm writing a new peer2peer filesharing system that will specialise in text, pdf and html documents that the man would like to keep down. it will allow you to search for strings inside the text body, and return results, google like, that show the context
[bc] zool me0w!
[county] she had a blue bra, it was lovely. I hate it now, though I loved it then!
[bc] okay, do you have any slightly see-through tops at all?
[county] Oh god, she looked lovely in it.
[bc] what we are going for here is the thrown-on, unsophisticated but lovely look
[me0w] I have a whole collection of see through wear
[me0w] but I don't think it would be appropriate for the places I'm going this evening
[county] "see-through" should be hyphenated.
[iat] bc "the man" doensn't care about text files
[bc] bugger appropriate. Look like a lost fawn in the wilderness
[bc] he does, iat, more than any other media
[iat] approprIATe interrupts my mp3s. plz stop tnx
[me0w] these pants require a thong
[bc] my filesharing network will have terrorist plans, blueprints, and government leaks and such
[bc] and books
[iat] no-one will use it for anything other than war3zing books
[bc] I will provide that service. It's more than a filesharing network, I intend it to be a peer-2-peer knowledge base sort of deal
[bc] you can do context searches and it will return a few paeges or a chapter from a book say
[bc] and it will allow a wikipedia type self editing bit
[iat] how long have you been programming?
[bc] but everything will be peer-2-peer, the whole encyclopaedia
[iat] aargh, not wikipedia!
[bc] not like that, but that's the model. Imagine a wikipaedia not located on any machine, but spread across a peer-2-peer netowrk. it could hold the Truth, regardless of what government or corporate law tries
[bc] it's a powerful concept for political and informational insurgency
[iat] there is no TRUTH
[bc] you state that like it is a truth
[bc] well, it's not!
[iat] of course
[iat] there is not truth... even to say that is not true... but to say its not true is also not true
[bc] it won't hold any particular truth, many truths and narratives
[bc] it shall be thoroughly decentralised and beyond the control of anyone, that is the point
[county] Quite right, bc. There are many truths, in this modern age.
[bc] must smoke
[iat] why not smoke then?
[bc] I'm ahead of you, iat
[iat] i've smoked 19 since 7:30 and have just 1 left
[bc] wow that's lots
[county] are there just 20 in a pack/:?
[iat] yeah, how many did you think there were?
[bc] yes, unless you get Rothman's Royals
[iat] oh yeah
[bc] which have 24, for some reason
[county] iat, I've never smoked.
[iat] or 10 packs, but you can't get those in usia
[bc] just think iat, if you had got Royals, you'd have 5 left now
[iat] heh
[me0w] I have a favour to ask
[iat] but they wouldn't taste half as nice as mmy marlboro lights
[bc] what's that me0w?
[bc] yuk
[me0w] bc, I need an opinion
[bc] I don't like Marlboro lights. I'm a Dunhill man
[me0w] bc, you know what my site currently looks like right?
[bc] yes
[bc] yes I do
[iat] dunhill?
[me0w] bc, ok
[bc] I browse it every 20 minutes
[iat] dunhill are for poor people, eight?
[iat] erm, right even
[bc] they are not for poor people
[bc] just the opposite
[iat] heh
[iat] my marlboro light costs me 4.70 a pack
[iat] beat that
[bc] this one has a more traditional bloggy feel me0w, but won't it mean the front page won't change as radically so often? I suppose I like it better in that you can see the previous articles, but less in that the front page doesn't periodically change radically, so that you don't know what will appear. It's prolly more sensible though
[bc] also, the right hand side seems wider somehow
[bc] mine cost £4.95
[bc] suck it!
[bc] and that's without inflated london prices
[iat] bah
[bc] it must be the pics making the right wider
[iat] that's stupid
[me0w] bc, the pics do make it wider
[iat] are dunhills those ones that have the wide packets that don't fit in your pocket?
[me0w] bc, this new system is a modifed blogger
[bc] those are dunhill internationals, iat, which I often get too, and are about £5.40
[iat] i know a gay guy who smokes the methol ones of those
[iat] draw your own conclusions
[bc] I see. Well, me0w, it makes the site less characterful and "homebrew", but probably more sensible and easier to navigate
[bc] depends what you want I suppose
[bc] iat, menthols of any stripe are for the less manly
[iat] heh. yeah
[bc] same as marlboro lights
[bc] female student's smoke, that
[iat] bah
[iat] marlboro lights are for those people who smoke but dont want to admit it to themselves
* momocrome has a crush on Siân Phillips
[iat] which does cover many female students i guess
[bc] you should have a commenting system me0w
[bc] what an ego-site then!
[bc] who, momocrome?
[bc] she sounds suspiciously welsh
[bc] I hope you haven't started liking welsh people
[momocrome] welch
[bc] I might have known it
[bc] poor momocrome
[iat] "mr blue sky, please tell us why you had to hide away for so long!"
[bc] ??
[iat] i'm singing
[bc] I thought it was some sort of prayer
[iat] no, it's ELO
[bc] oh
[bc] Electric Light Orchestra?
[iat] bah, i'm in danger of losing my lightweightedness
[iat] i've had 8 bottles of stella and am not feeling tired
[iat] yeah, electric light orchestra
[iat] i've always wondered how the words fit togeth in that phrase
[bc] you should try yourself spirits now that beer doesn't provide the kick it once did
[iat] is it: electric... light orchestra, or electric light.... orchestra?
[bc] look at county, he was drinking spirits insanely, now he is probably unconscious
[iat] i don't like spirits, they give me a hangover
[bc] try a clean ethanol-only spirit then
[bc] like vodka
*** Lumpen (~guest@cloaked.sea1.dsl.speakeasy.net) has joined #adequacy
[iat] an "ethanol only" spirit is surely pure ethanol
[bc] I mean, a spirit without any methanol
[bc] methanol is bad for hangovers
[bc] wine has loads of it
[iat] do they normally put methanol in spirits?
[bc] especially red wine
[bc] and the murkier spirits
[bc] iat, methanol is a natual alcohol of the fermentation process
[bc] there's usually much less of it than ethanol, but most drinks have it to varying amounts
[iat] is it? methanol is just a shorter carbon chain right?
[iat] can you get pissed off methanol?
[bc] I think so. Maybe longer, damned if I know
[bc] yes you can
[bc] it's an alcohol
[bc] but it gives you a much worse hangover
[momocrome] you'll go blind instantly when you get drunk off methanol
[iat] methanol is CH2OH from memory
[bc] which is why booze that has more of it gives you a worse hangover
[iat] ethanl is CH3CH20H
[bc] but generally they have little, but still enough for headaches
[bc] wine for example, I think only 5% of the alcohol in it is methanol
[bc] I forget, but a small amount
[iat] i'm fine off white wine, but red wine gives me shokcing headaches the morning after, as does guiness
[iat] oh dear, craig's gone mad again
[bc] red wine is the worst
[bc] iat: where?
[iat] 20721
[bc] I must look
[bc] I sort of provoked him
[iat] was it you stirring shit bc?
[momocrome] i have done my part as well
[iat] shame on you, vlad must be eliminated
[bc] I did a post attacking craig, yes
[bc] saying he should fantasise about he petrified virgin mary
[bc] and iat, goddamnit, phoning up vlad and stuff is totally over the line
[bc] and he's an insane fucker!
[iat] heh, what about garden gnomes?
[bc] no not me
[momocrome] it is actually illegal behaviour
[momocrome] but more than that, it is supid
[momocrome] suuupid
[momocrome] stupid
[bc] damned right
[bc] and not only that, the fucker posted all our names to the sid
[momocrome] this isn't trolling, it is thug-like cruelty
[bc] fuck him!
[iat] informal #adequacy poll. should iat have another drink?
[bc] yes momocrome
[bc] and yes iat
[iat] 1) no, he should sleep
[momocrome] yes, iat
[momocrome] 2) yes, iat
[iat] 2) no, he has no more fags, and booze with no fage makes iat sad
*** Lumpen is now known as FcmfAC
[iat] 2) yes, he still has too much booze to fit it into his cupboards
[iat] 4) yes, he's still not pissed
[iat] 5) yes, why not:?
[momocrome] pop up to the corner chop and procure a acket of fags
[iat] which one?
[iat] corner shop is not only closed. but it's on the common council estate
[momocrome] do you have a crowbar?
[FcmfAC] Ah, well.
[iat] if i had some rizlas, i could smoke my fag butts again
[FcmfAC] It's going to go down in flames.
[iat] more booze it is then
[FcmfAC] http://www.kuro5hin.org/displaystory/2002/11/16/2
[iat] bc, can you dcc me some fags?
*** bc sets mode: +b *!*tarque@*.telesp.net.br
Session Close: Sat Nov 16 20:16:23 2002
Session Start: Sun Nov 17 23:05:59 2002
*** Now talking in #adequacy
*** Topic is ' I remember when I first got drunk || I thought "I want to spend the rest of my days in this condition"'
*** Set by Sylvain on Sat Nov 16 18:51:55
shhhh
*** ChanServ sets mode: +b ws13!*@*
Session Close: Sun Nov 17 23:06:59 2002
It wouldn't take much work for them to make the autorun program eject the disc upon declining to the license agreement. To the average user who doesn't know how to disable autorun this would be really frustrating and annoying.
I pop the CD in my box and play it. The CD is a "dead" media, it's not something that magically comes to life and starts transmitting information.
Seriously, how stupid can people be? Ok, so the CD will buffer-overflow my player, and figure out how to access the outside world by executing it's malicious (processor and OS independent) code... You know what? No it won't!
Shit like that doesn't just happen.
So maybe *some* people run a player that facilitates said information gathering and transmission - that's their problem. Get a life, get a real player, get a real OS.
But CD's magically coming to life and transmitting my listening habits (which I guess it stored in the big secret database facility on the moon, which is by the way run by aliens under contract with the government - which is again why they had to fake the moon landing, but that's another story) - no, please, just forget about it...
I use Linux at home and Solaris at work. Will this affect me? It sounds like it is entirely dependant on which CD-playing program you use. If that's right, then surely it won't affect many people?
Follow me
This software, if it is decently written, looks like it isn't nearly as bad as the article says it is. First, as many have pointed out, you don't have to install it. But notice what it does in addition to sending out your personal information: it lets artists give you access to bonus tracks, artwork related to the music, tour info (and discounts), contests etc etc. It lets you chat (and synch music) with people listening to the same thing, which, although I wouldn't do it, would be considered a perk by a lot of listeners out there.
Furthermore, their privacy policy says they will not hand out required personal info, but only aggregate info. They do say that they will use your personal info to "contact you about services in which you have expressed interest," which may or may not mean spam. Really, "expressed" should mean a check box, but you never know. It looks like a loophole though. And of course, the artists can require your personal info to log in to their sites, but you can just refuse to give it and not log in if you think that's a problem.
All in all, I the article is bullshit. If this system is what it says it is, it's just an above-average media player that comes with the CD (although possibly at the cost of, say, a quarter to the buyer). Nothing to bitch about, invoking "privacy" and all that. If you're a privacy zealot, firewall it. If not, there are still a zillion other programs that are more likely to spy on you.
I hereby place the above post in the public domain.
Perhaps we'll see Microsoft buys or "borrows" the idea from Bandlink and incorporates this "nice" feature to the OS. More "added value" to Windows.
Good thing I turn my cds in to MP3s. I assume this removes the threat entirely.
Some drink at the fountain of knowledge. Others just gargle.
There is no mention of a opt in/opt out agreement when the cd is inserted on the website
Duh, there's your problem, you should insert the cd in your cd player, not a website!
I am tired of my email address being whored out
I am tired of companies thinking my phone number is necessary for a cash purchase
I am tired of marketers
I am tired of all the invasions that happen by companies
You know if my governemnt wants to know something about me that's one thing, I can vote those pricks out, but when fucking Radio Shack does that pisses me off. Sometimes I need a tralfaz emulator!
This
ANATOMY OF AN ASSHOLE
And you thought this was just going to be another
goats.cx link. Close. During
this bloody war with Mr. Lockwood, several interested lookers-on have commented,
"Yeah, Vlad is a fat, disgusting piece of shit, but why do you hate him that
much?? Do you berate your own feces before you flush it??" This is a question
which must be answered. Here, I will present to you just a few reasons for despising
William Scott Lockwood III. Read these with an open mind and an eye toward moral
clarity and I am certain you will reach the same conclusion that I and others have:
Lardinator Has To Go.
This is the face of a
child-molestor. It is no coincidence that Lockwood 3's children live all the
way on the other side of the country. His wife at the time (just one in a
continuous stream of buffalo), could not get her brood far enough away from the
cold clammy probing fingers of Lardinator. And knowing what a low-life piece of
white-trash her ex-husband is, she knew that Lardo would not spring for so much
as a ride in a 67 Mercury Comet to "see" his hell-spawn. Child molestors are
generally sexually abused in their own youth.
Take a long look at
the tortured echos of a deprived childhood.
Crapflooder Extraordinaire (note: I
know these are some big words, Scottie. Don't worry your little head about it.
Just rest assured you are being exposed for the worthless fuck you are).
William Scott Lockwood III used his third-rate troll site
Geekizoid to encourage the crap-flooding
and general assault of websites he deemed inappropriate. This included a tech site
oriented toward females, an animal rights site, child abuse sites (see above
paragraph for why Scotty found that one inappropriate), a site aimed at giving
advice to troubled teens and various other sites where people generally minded
their own business, blissfully unaware of the stinking mound of manure who had
eyed them for destruction only to sate his own appetite for power. When the
admin of one of those sites (yeah, it was mine) decided to give little Pecker-head
a taste of his own shit, it was suddenly a bad thing! Why, he was going to involve
the law! He was sending his server logs to EVERYONE in order to figure out who
was spanking his little butt good (he never did).
Idiot Supreme.
Yep, you read that right, folks. Fatty can't even read his own server logs!
And he wants YOU to buy a scoop "server" from him!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! We can see from
this old post that Fatty
dropped out of high-school. That would explain quite a bit.
Hypocrite Extreme.
Mr. Lardinator has a nasty habit of complaining to those who run message boards. He
constantly accused Rob Malda of being a hypocrite (a word Mr. Lardinator can't even
spell properly). He has also complained incessantly about K5's Rusty and others. Of
course, you now know from the Crapflooding paragraph, that Mr. Lardinator is the
biggest (in more ways than one) H Y P O C R I T E of them all.
Well, that's it for now. I can and will post more later, but I will let
you digest this in pieces. And please, join the crusade. It is the only way.
Dedicated to teaching quality Trolling skillz
STEP 1 : Pick a story and search through for a highly-rated or otherwise prominent comment in which someone uses a nubmered list. For example, you want to find something like this:
EXAMPLE:
- Blah!
- Blah!
- Blah!
For example, I selected this post as a prime target. There are only a few things to keep in mind: pick an active story and a comment that'll be seen by a lot of people as the target of your troll. The comment MUST contain a numbered list, similar to the above, although the exact style of numbering can vary. Also, try to pick a comment that hasn't already been trolled this way. Every comment with a numbered list will eventually get hit, so you want to be quick.STEP 2 : Take careful note of the method of numbering that your target post is using. It really doesn't matter, as long as it's numbered. For example, in this post I use text like "STEP 1", "STEP 2", etc. Note this carefully. This method of trolling makes the most sense when the list is a list of ordered steps (such as this vary document you are reading), BUT if the numbered list is something different, such as "REASON 1:", "REASON 2:", etc., hit it anyway! Your troll will be more esoetric and non-sequitur, but all the better: trolling doesn't always HAVE to make sense. Sometimes it's fun to confuse people.
STEP 3 : Now you'll put the information gained from step 2 to good use, as you attack the target you selected. This is where it gets complicated, so pay attention. This is easiest to explain with a couple of examples. Let's say your target looks like this:
TARGET POST:
Now, to pull off your masterfult act of trollage, you'll want to sneak in, post a reply, and do this:
TROLL REPLY:
- 4. ???
- 5. PROFIT!
Let's say that the post you're replying to is a bit more complex:TARGET POST:
Reasons Linix is so great!
*REASON 1: My allowance won't cover expensive software.
*REASON 2: Completely off-topic rant about Microsoft.
*REASON 3: I love Linix!!
Now you want to come in and do this:
TROLL REPLY:
*REASON 4: ???
*REASON 5: PROFIT!
Note what I did there: I emulated the exact style of his numbered list, and then added to it in order to cleverly troll him. THAT is the key. If he numbers his list using bold, use bold. If your target uses all caps, use all caps. If he uses Roman Numerals, use Roman Numerals (hint: I II III IV V VI VII VII IX X, then everything repeats from there), etc. Make YOUR list seem like an naturally-flowing conclusion to your TARGET's list. Then give him HELL! Here's the general key:
TARGET POST:
...
1. Blah!
2. Blah!
3. Blah!
X. Blah!
TROLL REPLY
X+1. ???
X+2. PROFIT!
I know it gets complicated when you throw in the algebra, but you should be able to do it. Keep track of the numbers on a piece of paper if you have to. It's vary difficult, but once you try it out, you'll get the hang of it. It's an aquired skill that can only be improved through hard work and practice. So get out there and troll!
Here's a summary:
STEP 1 : Pick your target (active, contains numbered list)
STEP 2 : Gather information (style of the numbered list)
STEP 3 : Nail the target by adding on to his own list!
STEP 4 : ???
STEP 5 : PROFIT!
See, I even did it to my own damn list! That's how easy it is once you become a master at this discipline of trolling! Good luck, young Jedi!!! Go out and troll the world, you motherfucking cuntrag bitches!!
WSL throughout the ages!
William Scott Lockwood 1 - Born 1924 to unknown parents. Abandoned in a trash can in New Orleans by his opium-addicted prostitute mother just minutes after birth. Raised in a Catholic orphanage staffed by pedophile priests. Named himself "William Scott Lockwood 1", combining the names of his three favorite Priests/lovers at the orphanage. After puberty, the priests started to ignore him in favor of the younger boys, and he felt jealous and alienated. He ran away at age 14 and lived in the gayest part of the French Quarter, sucking cocks for spare change. At age 17, his first and only sexual encounter with a female (a woman on Bourbon Street during Mardi Gras who claimed she was actually a male Drag Queen) resulted in the conception of a child. The woman, Fannie Sassaman, quickly left town and gave birth to the child in secret, without telling WSL1 that they had conceived a son together. WSL1 died in 1949 when his herpes infection migrated to his brain.
William Scott Lockwood 2 - Born 1942 to Fannie Sassaman by WSL1. Originally named Ezekiel Sassaman and raised as a good Jewish boy. A botched circumcision by a drunken Mohil left him with an almost nonfunctional penis. From the ages of 3 to 8, he was forced by his mother to shovel coal on a railroad for a living. At age 8, he learned of the true identity of his father, converted to Catholicism, and went to New Orleans to search for his father. (Fannie Sassaman's story doesn't end there, but we'll save it for a later date.) Ezekiel Sassaman renamed himself William Scott Lockwood 2 after his father, who he found lying dead in a gutter when he reached New Orleans. He joined up with a railroad hobo gang, and spent the next two decades riding the rails and carrying out a string of brutal rapes and murders around the country. His damaged penis kept him from conceiving any children, but in 1969, God blessed him with a miracle: one of the women he raped conceived a child. He married her, and shortly thereafter, WSL3 was born. WSL2 quit the railroad gang after his son's birth and settled down with his victim/wife. He is still wanted by the FBI as one of the most notorious serial killers of this century. He is considered heavily armed, extremely dangerous, and morbidly obese. Let the FBI know if you have seen this man. They have offered a $1,000,000 reward for any information leading to his arrest, capture, or death. After a recent sighting at an Illinois hospital, he is once again at large.
William Scott Lockwood 3 - Born 1969 to a nondescript obese housewife by WSL2. Much has already been written about the life of this man, so I won't cover territory that has already been excellently covered by others before me. Oh, and he runs an obscure website, but only about 5 people actually visit it. Currently struggling with AIDS, heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, chronic stress, liver disease, herpes, genital warts, crabs, the Clap, bad acne, morbid obesity, hypertension, and several unidentified illnesses.
William Scott Lockwood 4 - Born 1992 to Wife #2 by WSL3. Mentally scarred by the abuse and molestation he suffered at the hands of his father at a young age. At age 3, he convinced his mother to divorce WSL3, but that didn't stop the abuse, as WSL3 began a campaign of stalking against Wife #2 and WSL4. WSL4 holds the world record as the youngest person to independently get a restraining order issued against his own father, in 1996 at the age of 4. WSL3 lost interest in WSL4 on his sixth birthday, reportedly saying "they're just not sexy anymore when they get that old." His father left him with an AIDS infection, though, and he isn't expected to last much longer.
William Scott Lockwood 5 - ???
William Scott Lockwood 6 - PROFIT!!!
Fraudativeras!!
As quite possibly the only member of the old-school Slashdot trolls to ever actually attempt a serious and meaningful conversation with Mr. Lockwood (it worked, briefly), I feel compelled to comment on this.
That Geekizoid is an inanity is beyond dispute. That it is what it is almost entirely because of Mr. Lockwood is also beyond dispute. That Mr. Lockwood has, furthermore, contributed substantially to the deterioration of every site to which he has ever posted, save only those which were beyond redemption before he ever saw them (a category which arguably includes Slashdot), I will not dispute. That all of this, along with the other charges leveled against him, proves that Mr. Lockwood sucks, I will not dispute.
The real question behind all this, though, is not whether Mr. Lockwood sucks, but why Mr. Lockwood sucks. One might say that it does not matter, noting, by analogy, that one does not psychoanalyze a rabid dog, but instead simply puts it out of its misery. But it does matter, for in his own odd and frightening way, Scott Lockwood is Everyman. If you do not understand him, you do not understand anyone, probably including yourself.
Everyone, seemingly, detests Mr. Lockwood. Given that he had been married four times before he turned 30, this "everyone" may well include three ex-wives (last I heard, we're still waiting for his inevitable fourth divorce). From various anecdotes he has let drop over the years, there are a variety of real-life acquaintances, co-workers, and blood relatives in this category as well. So clearly, this is not just an online phenomenon; Mr. Lockwood is not a caring, sensitive man who lets off steam late at night by flaming people on weblogs. He is like this all the time. It is not a pose. It is the real Scott Lockwood, at 200 proof.
Mr. Lockwood himself is not unaware of this. He knows (and wishes it were not so) that dislike follows him around like the odor of alcohol trails after a drunk. But he has no idea why this is so. He knows it has to do with his abrasive and temperamental demeanor; he knows that his argumentative and self-righteous comments, and his complaints of being mistreated, win him no friends. But the connection between the cause and the effect, and the difference between his conduct and most other people's, escapes him. He has given up hope of understanding or improving the situation; he expects that it will continue, without change, for the rest of his life.
Mr. Lockwood does not understand that all of these things are symptomatic of a malaise that underlies his entire life. It is a condition that he was very nearly born with, and one which victimizes nearly all people to some degree. Most of us are not nearly as bad off as Mr. Lockwood; but there are some that have much more severe cases than him. Many rapists, murderers, and other violent criminals fall into that latter category. But even those of us who merely think ourselves better or smarter than everyone else, or who consider ourselves fit to decide what is right for everyone else, or who mock others for what they believe, are victims of this condition to some degree. I include myself in this; I do not claim (yet) to be speaking from a perspective completely outside the state of disease.
Mr. Lockwood's problem, to put it simply, is that he perceives the universe to be antagonistic to him. He has divided the universe into Self and Other, and decided that these two are eternal antagonists. Everything is his enemy; every action that anyone takes (other than to praise him), he perceives as some sort of attack, and he retaliates accordingly. He is convinced, although probably only subconsciously, that his life is a war in which he stands alone against all the forces of the universe. It is, in essence, the ultimate in paranoia.
As I wrote above, nearly everyone shares this condition to some extent. Many serial killers operate on the principle that, life being a never-ending battle that they will ultimately lose, they should take as many of the "enemy" with them as they can before they fall. But even ordinary people mostly act on analogous principles. Many people exploit the world around them in destructive or insensitive ways, or mistreat their fellow humans needlessly. This is all a consequence of defining the Other as an enemy; and this, in turn, is based on the fundamental error of dividing the universe into Self and Other.
What we all (Mr. Lockwood included) should strive for is an end to this division, which is really only a matter of mental habits, not an a priori property of existence. It derives from the infant's perception that part of what he perceives obeys his will and sends him sensory input (Self), and the rest does not (Other). The antagonism between these two hypothesized entities derives from the instinctive desire on the child's part to impose his will on everything; Other does not do what he wants, and is therefore the enemy. And so the infant makes the fundamental error that haunts him, in most cases, for the rest of his life.
This is what makes Mr. Lockwood tick. It is probably also what makes you tick. Think about that carefully before flaming him simply because his case is a bit worse than yours -- if indeed you are better off.
--mv
...enough said.
-- Slashdot: When Public Access TV Says "No"
As quite possibly the only member of the old-school Slashdot trolls to ever actually attempt a serious and meaningful conversation with Mr. Lockwood (it worked, briefly), I feel compelled to comment on this.
That Geekizoid is an inanity is beyond dispute. That it is what it is almost entirely because of Mr. Lockwood is also beyond dispute. That Mr. Lockwood has, furthermore, contributed substantially to the deterioration of every site to which he has ever posted, save only those which were beyond redemption before he ever saw them (a category which arguably includes Slashdot), I will not dispute. That all of this, along with the other charges leveled against him, proves that Mr. Lockwood sucks, I will not dispute.
The real question behind all this, though, is not whether Mr. Lockwood sucks, but why Mr. Lockwood sucks. One might say that it does not matter, noting, by analogy, that one does not psychoanalyze a rabid dog, but instead simply puts it out of its misery. But it does matter, for in his own odd and frightening way, Scott Lockwood is Everyman. If you do not understand him, you do not understand anyone, probably including yourself.
Everyone, seemingly, detests Mr. Lockwood. Given that he had been married four times before he turned 30, this "everyone" may well include three ex-wives (last I heard, we're still waiting for his inevitable fourth divorce). From various anecdotes he has let drop over the years, there are a variety of real-life acquaintances, co-workers, and blood relatives in this category as well. So clearly, this is not just an online phenomenon; Mr. Lockwood is not a caring, sensitive man who lets off steam late at night by flaming people on weblogs. He is like this all the time. It is not a pose. It is the real Scott Lockwood, at 200 proof.
Mr. Lockwood himself is not unaware of this. He knows (and wishes it were not so) that dislike follows him around like the odor of alcohol trails after a drunk. But he has no idea why this is so. He knows it has to do with his abrasive and temperamental demeanor; he knows that his argumentative and self-righteous comments, and his complaints of being mistreated, win him no friends. But the connection between the cause and the effect, and the difference between his conduct and most other people's, escapes him. He has given up hope of understanding or improving the situation; he expects that it will continue, without change, for the rest of his life.
Mr. Lockwood does not understand that all of these things are symptomatic of a malaise that underlies his entire life. It is a condition that he was very nearly born with, and one which victimizes nearly all people to some degree. Most of us are not nearly as bad off as Mr. Lockwood; but there are some that have much more severe cases than him. Many rapists, murderers, and other violent criminals fall into that latter category. But even those of us who merely think ourselves better or smarter than everyone else, or who consider ourselves fit to decide what is right for everyone else, or who mock others for what they believe, are victims of this condition to some degree. I include myself in this; I do not claim (yet) to be speaking from a perspective completely outside the state of disease.
Mr. Lockwood's problem, to put it simply, is that he perceives the universe to be antagonistic to him. He has divided the universe into Self and Other, and decided that these two are eternal antagonists. Everything is his enemy; every action that anyone takes (other than to praise him), he perceives as some sort of attack, and he retaliates accordingly. He is convinced, although probably only subconsciously, that his life is a war in which he stands alone against all the forces of the universe. It is, in essence, the ultimate in paranoia.
As I wrote above, nearly everyone shares this condition to some extent. Many serial killers operate on the principle that, life being a never-ending battle that they will ultimately lose, they should take as many of the "enemy" with them as they can before they fall. But even ordinary people mostly act on analogous principles. Many people exploit the world around them in destructive or insensitive ways, or mistreat their fellow humans needlessly. This is all a consequence of defining the Other as an enemy; and this, in turn, is based on the fundamental error of dividing the universe into Self and Other.
What we all (Mr. Lockwood included) should strive for is an end to this division, which is really only a matter of mental habits, not an a priori property of existence. It derives from the infant's perception that part of what he perceives obeys his will and sends him sensory input (Self), and the rest does not (Other). The antagonism between these two hypothesized entities derives from the instinctive desire on the child's part to impose his will on everything; Other does not do what he wants, and is therefore the enemy. And so the infant makes the fundamental error that haunts him, in most cases, for the rest of his life.
This is what makes Mr. Lockwood tick. It is probably also what makes you tick. Think about that carefully before flaming him simply because his case is a bit worse than yours -- if indeed you are better off.
--mv
against unauthorized access. Perhaps if the "average Joe" started to insist they apply to *his* computer as well the corporate server things would get, ummmmmmm, interesting.
Of course if your computer software comes attached with an offensive EULA in which you "agree" to have no rights to your own system/network you might well be hosed. I'd like to see someone challange this in court *on the basis that you can't be coerced into signing away a basic property right, even by contract.*
To my knowledge this hasn't been tried yet in America ( in some other countries the EULA is already considered invalid prima facie). All it takes is someone devoted to the cause with $50,000 American and five years of their life to devote to it.
Of course there's another option. *Don't use EULAed software.*
In that case the assumption of having to give some sort of explicit permission to enter your system ought to hold just as much for the personally computer as it does for the corporate/government computer.
Hacking is a crime. Do your homework, secure your system, and then insist on *prosocuting* any "hacking" of you system, no matter who the "hacker" is.
Laws are double edged swords that can cut the person who "bought" the law just as well as those it was intended to be a weapon against if the intended victim learns how to use the "weapon."
KFG
Why Evil is Good
I hate victims. Victims are the albatross hung from the neck of society. The
term is not even acknowledged by any other species. I am certain if there are
intelligent beings elsewhere in the universe, they follow the strict principle
of Natural Selection. Only the Strong shall survive. Mankind cannot survive
as long as its virility is diluted by the weak.
Peace-and-Love hippies, retards, cripples, depressives, sickling, addicts
and whiners are all victims of one kind or another. Larger examples of victims
can also be found: the entire nations of Israel and Englund, for example, are
constantly victimized and/or whining about their lack of power in the world. In
fact, the entire continent of Europe is nothing but a festering sewer of whiners
and welfare states. If we, the strongest nation on Earth, had a decent Ruler,
the entire junk-heap of Eurotrash would be burned to create a cloud of such lethal
density it would waft over to Asia and take out the victims that were left over from
World War II. The great black column of suffocating smoke would rise high into the
atmosphere, reaching for the very edges of outer space - a giant, living monument
to our strength. The unviable ashes of the once living garbage would orbit the Earth,
forever reminding future generations of the price of weakness.
World War II. Probably the greatest single era in the history of the planet, barring
the time before Man and Man's distorted, unnatural philosophies of "common good" and
"protecting the innocent". The time of Germany and its rule by a man of great vision.
A man who saw the virtue of evil. Every single class of victim described above was
dealt with in the harshest possible manner. Most people focus on the genocidal aspect
of Hitler's activities but his vision was much wider, encompassing every brand of
weakling from ethnic victims to sexual deviants. Unfortunately the United States,
led by a cripple, had to involve our great military might on the wrong side of the
war. The least Roosevelt could have done was to allow Germany to finish raping
France and reduce Englund to rubble.
We paid for our mistake in World War II. We were punished for choosing the wrong
side in the Great War by a period of non-violent "Cold War". The term "Cold War"
itself is the mark of the true Beast: the peace lover. A true leader - a Ruler -
would have unleashed the full might of our nuclear arsenal upon every nation on the
Earth, banishing them forever to particles of glowing dust blowing through the winds
of history. And look what our lack of action has gotten us: A planet filled with
human garbage, eternal sufferers suckling from the breast of the Mighty.
It is beyond my comprehension. Not only am I forced to allow the weak to survive,
but I - we - are forced to subsidize their pathetic existence. Every cripple
creeping along the sidewalk. Every degenerate elderly woman with osteoporosis who
parks in the handicap parking spot. Every worthless, lazy hippy who cries for peace
and marches on a public university. Every sickling child perpetually hospitalized
because its fetid welfare mother smoked too many drugs during her pregnancy. Every
30 year old retard wiping its nose all over its Scooby Doo coloring book. Every
drunk little whore seeking "justice" in our courts for her rape. All of them,
and more, deserve nothing but death. In the Natural World, every single one of these
leeches would be lion fodder.
Even the "Good Book", the Bible - which is actually nothing more than the sick fantasies
of opium addicts - predicts the outcome of Nature: "The meek shall inherit the Earth".
Yes, I know what you're saying, but you are wrong. This phrase has been twisted by the
weak, the cripple, the Jew to give their pathetic lives some ray of hope. This phrase
does not mean that the Victim will Rule the world. That is laughable. That is impossible.
The meek shall inherit the Earth for the one and only reason that they will be buried in
it.
To the strong who have read this: Thank you. Together, we will conquer. To the weak who
will whine in the comments below: Your days are numbered, trash.
You were fun when you were intelligent, now you are just stupid.
Wow, ohmyGOD, Pumpernickel told me to FOAD. I guess I'd better do what he says!! Oh, wait. There's absolutely no reason for me to do what he says, now that I think about it.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material.
Confidential material.
Confidential material.
Confidentail material.
That's just scratching the surface. I could go back further, if you like.
If you actually look, you'll see that 90% of the real spam (multiple identical messages posted minute apart in an attempt to push our messages off the page) is posted by our enemies, Lockwood and his VladeKua5y minions. Maybe you just don't read carefully.
We generate more original material than evaryone else here COMBINED, and we generate BETTER stuff, too. We ARE Trolltalk. We are what's keeping it alive despite all attempts to destroy it. YOU are one of those attempts.
Mr. "Quick Star" and Mr. Fake "Scott Lockwood", I have a message for you: get ready for a world of hurt. The first lesson is free.
Have you ever seen the movies Where the Heart Is and Anywhere but Here starring Natalie Portman? How about the classic Meg Ryan romantic comedies When Harry Met Sally and Sleepless in Seattle? Well, THAT'S the style of Martial Arts I practice. I've perfected the ruthless and efficient OLSEN TWINS FASH-SLAP STANCE!
How about the the classic Sci-Fi cult hits Plan 9 from Outer Space and The Rocky Horror Picture Show? Well, I know the martial arts from THOSE movies too! Let me show you THE PATHETIC TRANSVESTITE ALIEN STANCE!
I've also recently started to learn the martial arts from several new movies such as Jackass: the Movie, My Big Fat Greek Wedding, and Jonah: A VeggieTales Movie. I really look forward to learning the martial arts from the upcoming movie Eight Mile starring my FAVORITE HERO EVAR, Eminem (a.k.a. Slim Shady & Marshall Mathers), so you'd better watch out for my ANGRY WHITE NIGGER STANCE!!!!
I'm also learning even more martial arts from this web page [realultimatepower.net], including the deadly KUNG-FU NINJA JESUS ATTACK STANCE! Hi-YAH!!!
I'm working to improve my rythm [klerck.org], flexibility [rotten.com], stealth skills [fartbuster.com], self-confidence [yahoo.com], and critical thinking [timecube.com] skills, so you'd better watch out, because very soon I will perfect my ultimate attack, THE LARD-LIKE ANTISOCIAL DEPRESSIVE ASSHOLE SPAMMER IMPOTENT PAEDOPHILE FELCHING FLATULENT WIGGER SUMO-SAMURAI CHILD-ABUSE RESTRAINING-ORDER UNWASHED BASTARDIZED ANAL IMMATURE CATHOLIC GOATFUCKER STANCE!!!!
If that doesn't scare you... just wait and see. You'll get yours soon enough.
As Nietzsche said, "If you stare too long into my ass [klerck.org], beware, for my ass [klerck.org] might start to stare back into you."
-- Vlad
I just LOVE Vladinator's site [olsentwins.com]. Especially the "flab" [olsentwins.com] section, where I learned to use a fold of my own stomach-flab as a Martial Arts weapon. Oh and the "aborted fetus" photos!
Of course, don't forget to read Vladinator's entrails [olsentwins.com]. Here you will find how truly difficult it is to decide what to do on the weekends... have an orgy party? A faggot party? Go to the the mall naked and get arrested for public indecency? Have a sleepover and get woken up by Nigerians on the phone?
In short, if you haven't seen Vladinator's site [olsentwins.com], you don't know what you're missing!
I just LOVE Vladinator's site [olsentwins.com]. Especially the "flab" [olsentwins.com] section, where I learned to use a fold of my own stomach-flab as a Martial Arts weapon. Oh and the "aborted fetus" photos!
Of course, don't forget to read Vladinator's entrails [olsentwins.com]. Here you will find how truly difficult it is to decide what to do on the weekends... have an orgy party? A faggot party? Go to the the mall naked and get arrested for public indecency? Try to sleep but get woken up by Nigerians on the phone?
In short, if you haven't seen Vladinator's site [olsentwins.com], you don't know what you're missing!
I just LOVE The Anti-Vlad Triad's site! Especially the "fash" section, where I learned to cut the bottom off of an old shirt to use as a hair enhancement! Oh, and the "dance party" photos!
Of course, don't forget to read The Anti-Vlad Triad's emails! Here you will discover how truly difficult it is to decide what to do on the weekends... have a LAN party? A hash party? Go to the mall to look at underage girls? Have a sleepover and call Scott Lockwood at midnight?
In short, if you haven't checked out The Anti-Vlad Triad's site, you don't know what you're missing!
That latest one is too long to read... ...3 466
<wsl3> We need something new in there already...
<wsl3> Hey, I know...
<wsl3>
<county> Generally, yes, Sulla.
<wsl3> Much better.
<county> And when I do talk to women I'm attracted to, I'm just biting and cutting.
<wsl3> http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=20721&cid=468
NT
It's time to add Rusty Foster to "the list" of people who shouldn't be breathing.
Kuro5hin, "the democratic news site", has abandoned all pretenses of Democracy and has gone into full Fascist/Censorship mode.
These are the recent deeds of Kuro5hin.org:
1. Deleting numerous comments entirely, circumventing the site's established ratings procedure. Many of the comments deleted were highly rated at the time of deletion, indicating that THE PEOPLE wanted them to stay.
2. Disabling numerous user accounts. Many of these accounts were disabled before they even posted anything.
3. Enacting IP bans against several users, and adding additional IP bans as these persecuted people kept changing IPs to avoid censorship.
4. Deleting many diaries, including several that contained no abusive/offensive content, for no reason and with no warning or notice.
5. Keeping all this secret, because Rusty Foster knows he would be lynched by his readership if his Nazi-like practices were evar revealed.
Disabling dozens of accounts... deleting dozens of comments... banning dozens of IPs and several entire subnets... is this Democracy??
Rusty Foster is going to be second against the wall when the revolution comes, right behind his gay lovebuddy William Scott Lockwood III.
(Applies only to windows users)
:
:
v ic es\CDRom
The scumware installer appearing when you insert the CD is located on the first partition of the disc, which contains CD-rom data with win32 code. This partition has an autorun.inf file with a link to the installer.
So far I've not encountered any installers actually installing anything without first prompting for permission to do so (legal mumbo jumbo as mentioned in the discussed scheme nothing more than chaff to confuse and dissuade sheeple from clicking the 'No - I disagree with these terms. Do not install' button, which should be the preferred choice.)
However, following trends from the ever more aggressive piranha feeding frenzy world of ruthless cyber marketeers, it's a matter of certainty that we shall soon see automatically running installers delivering their nasty payloads with cunning stealth, pausing neither to seek permission or to announce that such an installation actually took place. Perhaps this has already happened. How would you know?
Stealth deployment of viral spyware is commonplace with the parasitic ridealong schemes seen infecting the installers of "free" ad-supported software such as KaZaa, and many others. This is the crack in the floorboards from where things like the Bonzi Buddy creep out at night.
To prevent exposing yourself to the risk of CD-deployed malware installation, either hold down the shift key each time you insert such a potentially infected hybrid music CD, or simply disable the autorun feature entirely - much safer, easy to do and fully reversible
Locate this key in your windows Registry - use regedit
HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\System\CurrentControlSet\Ser
Set value of Autorun parameter to zero. Then reboot. In the future when you insert software installer CDs you will then have to hunt down and manually execute the installer yourself; if the location and name of the installer is not obvious, examine the now disregarded autorun.inf file at the CD-Rom drive root.
By the way, if you have one such infected CD in your collection, and you have already ripped the tracks and burned them to a 'clean' CD for listening to sans spyware and data partitions, why not mail the original disc to Mr. Ralsky at 6747 MINNOW POND DR, WEST BLOOMFIELD, MI 48322
So what? ::gasp:: give me more of the products I want! They'll be able to see what kinds of music I think are not crap and make more of it so I'll buy music, stock the grocery stores with goods I'd rather buy to entice me into larger purchases, and even make it easier for me to buy the things I'd be buying anyway.
Now corporations will be able to
For all of this talk about how our privacy is being eroded, nobody ever actually steps up and gives a really good reason why that's a bad thing. It's just as arguably a good thing, and in the end there is no hope of reversing this stuff anyway.
Might as well let it go and stop holding off on the benfits of the future. This resistance is hurting us all more than the actual erosion ever could.
Scott Lockwood whines just to hear himself.
"You know, I'd stay retired if these fools would just find another target."
We did. We had an agreement. We moved on to other things. Scott Lockwood didn't. Scott Lockwood couldn't STAND being left alone. He can't live without negative attention, and he's willing to do whatever it takes to atract it. He had, and still does, have the chance to be left alone FOREVAR, just by shutting the hell up. We gave him once chance, and he flat-out lied to us. We left him alone, and he couldn't stand it, so he started spamming himself all over the Internet and goading us to pay attention to him again.
We put up with it for quite a while, but the frequency and volume of his attention-seeking continued to increase. Well, if he wants attention, he'll get it.
Scott Lockwood, it's all up to you. You can stop it any time you like. You know that VladeKua5y is doomed. Stop fucking yourself over. You can end it any time, if you have willpower and honest. The problem is that you don't. You have no morality as a person.
Is this Scott Lockwood? No, Scott Lockwood is much wider than that. Is this Scott Lockwood, or is this? There are so many that seem to fit him, I just can't decide.
Oh well. On to the future. There's much to be done, and little time to do it.
I like your trolls.
Whaddabout
Xbo.cx!
YHBT YHL HAND
Hey Mister CEO, how 'bout you invite me to your house?
When you guide me to the door at the end of my visit do you mind if I leave wireless web cams scattered thoughout your house? Like say in your living room and kitchen? Or how about your bedrooms and bathrooms? It would really help me to understand you better.
Honestly (and sarcasm aside now) - I would just like to know where these people come up with these ideas. Do they not realize it's invasive? Then again thay probably have the same undertsnading impairment of Mr. Ralsky
***Blackholes are where the gods divided by zero.***
You were fun when you were intelligent, now you are just stupid.
Wow, ohmyGOD, Pumpernickel told me to FOAD. I guess I'd better do what he says!! Oh, wait. There's absolutely no reason for me to do what he says, now that I think about it.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material. Creative material.
Creative material. Creative material.
Confidential material.
Confidential material.
Confidentail material.
That's just scratching the surface. I could go back further, if you like.
If you actually look, you'll see that 90% of the real spam (multiple identical messages posted minute apart in an attempt to push our messages off the page) is posted by our enemies, Lockwood and his VladeKua5y minions. Maybe you just don't read carefully.
We generate more original material than evaryone else here COMBINED, and we generate BETTER stuff, too. We ARE Trolltalk. We are what's keeping it alive despite all attempts to destroy it. YOU are one of those attempts.
one of your points, ZoneAlarm (at least) does checksum all the apps and compares them when they request a connection.
Wow, I would have thought that that would have been prohibitively expensive performancewise, which is why I would assume that only a "trusted OS" would do that. Interesting. So I'd assume (since Google fails to turn up a detailed whitepaper on the first few hits) that ZA MD5s the binary at the first socket access the app tries during an invocation (it certainly can't be every time the app tries to do something, or performance would be completely unbearable).
But you really don't have to go to all this work. Copy (or contain) a copy of a trusted binary. Drop it into a directory somewhere. Drop a modified msvcrt.dll in the same directory, and let the program link to said DLL, and you've easily got untrusted code running within your "trusted" application.
Frankly, as long as the OS doesn't have pretty low level support for this, you're going to be able to bypass it.
I wonder what ZA could do to fix this? MD5summing linked to DLLs would be kind of expensive, and wouldn't work at all if there was application-initiated (rather than load-time OS-initiated) dynamic linking going on. I guess you could do that, take the performance hit...then ZA could hook LoadLibrary() and handle application-initiated linking....
Still, as you and I mentioned, the monolithic design of IE, providing application-level services and using components left and right, is pretty much an unstoppable impediment to securing a Windows-based system.
May we never see th
Yay... narcware!
This is even dumber because if record companies wanted me to send them the play counts from my MP3 program so that they could make more of the kind of music I like, I would gladly do it. Just use an open source program so that we know exactly what it's doing, and make sure users are asked if they want to participate.
"Reality is just a convenient measure of complexity" -Alvy Ray Smith
The company's privacy policy is listed on their site. From a quick read, the only thing that upsets me is that they pass along your info to the recording groups. It appears that only basic contact info is gathered and there is a fairly easy opt out approach. Of course, they can publish a rosy policy and blatantly ignore it.
From what I can tell, they are trying to impress recording labels with an avenue to add value to the CD. I read a lot of ranting about how the music industry is clueless and could leverage the Internet better. Maybe this is a positive more in that direction. It is hard to tell.
I'm a bit paranoid about it as well, but since I use Mac OS X I'll let the Windows people cut their teeth on this one.
-- Solaris Central - http://w
Creating a profile of your customers isnt really anything wrong and its advisable for those companies interested in providing good services. If I owned a record company I would like to have my customers profiled. The problem arises when you dont have the choice wheter to be profiled or not. So far bandlink asks for your permission. So the only thing that can be done is to expect that this information turns back to us in the form of better music. At least, i think, we should try not to think that record companies are evil by nature.
I can imagine a few bored hacker types writing something to flood Bandlink with bogus data. "Wow, a million people a day are playing 'Baby Got Back' every hour on the hour!"
I can imagine really, really bored hackers writing a virus to have infected computers spoof data. A new world-wide phenonmena: Polka Love songs!
I bought Santana's Shaman last month and it has the wonderful tracking technology built in. I was curious as to what the "Bandlink" thing did when I bought the cd (never heard of it before). Luckily, I went to their website first and saw the usage statistics crap and decided against installing it.
... but I don't want to have to give up personal privacy for those extras. If I just had to install and register I wouldn't mind, tracking is going too far IMHO.
... for text file!.
I read part way through the EULA (which is apparently available on their website but I couldn't find it) but I didn't see anything about allowing them access to all information.
I support the idea of adding content to cd's to make them more attractive to purchase
Since I couldn't find the EULA online (as promised) i've taken the liberty of posting it online (hopefully its not illegal but oh well).
Its available here
It weighs in at a hefty 12.8kB
Hmmm...
wonder how careful they were in programming the server app that listens for these "tattle-tale" CDs.
Just a thought
Tim
The best way to stop this kind of thing is to figure out what it is sending and then to generate reports about things we are not listening to. It will make the marketing reports useless.
Just don't buy the CDs. I stopped buying CDs over a year ago. I'm not worried about it, nor do I care. I haven't heard anything released since then that I'd want to spend my cash on anyway. If I hear anything that I really like, I'll download it. If the RIAA is sucessful in stopping me from doing that then I just don't listen to new music any more. I have enough music in my collection that I've legally purchaed to keep me happy for a long, long time -- especially at the rate good music is coming out these days.
Really, who cares? Let them bankrupt themselves.
I wouldn't mind this software - though a bit extended - running in music shops. If I would want to buy a cd and listen to it before I buy, I would like to have a touch screen with a 1-10 score for each song. That way I - the customer can express what I feel for each song so the Record Companies may actually see that they publish Bad Stuff (tm). Include two buttons on the screen saying "good music, will buy" and "crap again, will download favourite songs from P2P though" and they can get a legit sense of the consumers' viewpoints. This will be perfectly anonymous (yeehaw for paranoia) and optional.
They can use this scheme for the downloaded software too, and privacy issues aside, both the consumer and the industry may benefit from this.
The best weapon of a dictatorship is secrecy, but the best weapon of a democracy should be the weapon of openness.
The CD player watches YOU
Oh wait... that's whats happening here.
"And we have seen and do testify that the Father sent the Son to be the Savior of the World"
1 John 4:14
with all this spyware a 3gig cap on broadband in australia doesnt sound so bad... NOT.
This country has only existed for a little over two hundred years, afterall. Time will tell how it will at play out. Let's just hope that we don't end up like SOVIET RUSSIA.
This may have merit, but as a nerd, I shudder at the entire nauseating concept of such an invasion.
I just don't like how they don't ask. If they said it clearly, released two versions, and/or popped up a dialog requester with a simple "May I," it wouldn't be a problem. But the fact that it's so subtle and silent indicates to me that this company knows that this misfeature is not going to make it popular.
On the flip side, it will show artists what music is popular, and what we like to hear, so more of it will be made.
On the flip side's flip side, said artists will just create the same type of music, remixed a bit, and rereleased- it's the new stuff that I like, the odd and offbeat. If it's cloned, it sort of loses that.
It's sort of like a survey about your music preferences. Except they don't ask if you want to take it.
I can also see a DDoS attack on the system myseriously slowing down your comptuer (if you don't know this is happening) if their server gets overloaded by a whole bunch of music listeners, or just a good old ping flood, as your system tries again and again to send. I bet this could cause a good bit of net.congestion, too.
Not to mention that modem users will hate its guts.
Warning: Poster of this comment is a nerd. Just like everybody else here.
So what? ::gasp:: give me more of the products I want! They'll be able to see what kinds of music I think are not crap and make more of it so I'll buy music, stock the grocery stores with goods I'd rather buy to entice me into larger purchases, and even make it easier for me to buy the things I'd be buying anyway.
Now corporations will be able to
For all of this talk about how our privacy is being eroded, nobody ever actually steps up and gives a really good reason why that's a bad thing. It's just as arguably a good thing, and in the end there is no hope of reversing this stuff anyway.
Might as well let it go and stop holding off on the benfits of the future, right? This resistance is hurting us all more than the actual erosion ever could.
Can someone work out EXACTLY what this software does, so we can fake it and pollute their data.
:-)
Once the record companies see that the service they are buying from these people is compromised.
What we need is a distributed DOS tool that we can all run and make Greensleeves the most popular tune of the millenium. Or better yet, Britney (you didn't really believe that she was that popular did you ?).
Let's see, I pay for the dial-up service. I pay for the cd. They use my cd, my computer, and my bandwidth. Therefore they owe the user. Before you laugh, I believe it was Georgia Tech that successfully sued an employee for computer time and bandwidth because he loaded the SETI program (or something similiar) and had lab computers doing computations during screen saving. If they did win, there is then precidence for this type of a law suit.
In a place beyond time and space, in a land far better than this, look for me there...
Now, does this mean I can make a copy of only the software on this disk, or the entire disk? Seems to me that this would give a "fair use" type argument for making that copy. However, you'd have to use an average speed CD player or less, otherwise you'd be making too many copies.
I care about privacy, but when somebody else asks me about it, I don't know how to respond. How do you reply to people who say, "But I have nothing to hide!"
BD Phone Home!
Shameless plug. Like you weren't expecting it.
I just now figured out some of the recent emails that have come my way from Slashdot.
I speak on behalf of Bandlink so you can please respond to Support@bandlink.com with any questions you have about the software.
Jump to Conclusion:
Essentially, we always get mixed in with the ominous nature of the Recording
Industry in terms of the Napster litigations and other bad press. We don't offer any encryption software and we are not "Spyware".
What is it?
Bandlink is pretty basic in its technology. Designed to make Music "Bigger"
by providing actual CD owners access to Online Bonus content and other extras. The Online content is served
from a webserver which, like all webservers, provide "Webtrends" style
analysis for what files are interacted with or downloaded.
(This makes up the bulk of our reports and all websites from Amazon, to the NY Times does this.)
When users interact, with the bonus content, the "Aggregate" information is
compiled in reports. Also, if the music listener "Ranks" a specific song from the CD or
from the web based Bonus Content section, then that too is added to the reports which go directly to the musician or record label who most needs to know.
In terms of personal information, and like most websites, we don't know who is viewing our web content, we just know that someone is.
All of this information, as most Internet savvy users will know can be obtained via a "Web Server Log". If a user fills out a survey which requests personal information than that is the users choice, and that information will be sent directly to the artists themselves. (Personal info is pretty much limited to mailing lists and other opt-in services.)
Other than that, Bandlink is pretty mundane. I have seen some of the things that the music industry is considering in terms of encryption, and believe me that this is much much better in that it gives the fans extra content, and lets the artists know more about their fans.
Please feel free to ask us any further questions about the software directly.
I have read through most of your posts and you guys are kind of going down a technical path that gives Bandlink waaaaay too much credit. But you are giving some good ideas! (kidding)
Support@bandlink.com
a decentralized internet protocol...perhaps imbedded into a freenet-ish decentralized OS. I advocate a complete abandonment of any protocol that traffics advertisements. Yeah that's a bit extreme, but at this point its only going to get worse. A geek-supported protocol that forbids such waste of bandwidth is the perfect way to fight back. "...even though we die, La Resistance lives on!"
What's to keep people from finding out the data format of the outgoing packets and seeding their database with a couple of terabytes of bogus statistics? Say every couple seconds a few thousand users send out packets stating that everyone is listening to the best of the 700 club or something? This seems relatively east to make useless, as there can't be too much authentication going on here...
then why are you wearing clothes?"
This list came from PeerGuardian's blocking list. I'm guessing the BSA IP block at the end. If you really want to keep from reporting data to said parties, just add these (and whatever other beneficiaries of your private data) to your iptables, ipfilter, ZoneAlarm, Tiny, etc. blocked zones. Note that, if for any reason, you want to go to these parties' websites, you won't be able to; your firewall will block access.
...but it just feels so good!
. 160.127.255
R anger:204.92.244.0-204.92.244.2551 92.0.0-65.192.0.255. 255.255e fender:66.79.0.0-66.79.255.255- 208.225.90.255
MPAA:63.199.57.96-63.199.57.1281 28-64.166.187.1925 51 28.0-207.155.255.2555 5.2552 7 .155.128.0-207.155.255.2559 .0-64.94.89.2553 5.247.255. 255I AA:208.192.0.0-208.192.255.2556 .32.50
Or, to be perfectly safe, you could borrow a page from our current administration's sex ed book and abstain from downloading.
OverPeer:65.174.255.255
OverPeer:65.160.0.0-65
Ranger:216.122.0.0-216.122.255.255
MediaForce:65.
MediaForce:65.223.0.0-65.223
MediaForce:4.43.96.0-4.43.96.255
MediaD
RIAA:208.225.90.0
RIAA:12.150.191.0-12.150.191.255
MPAA:64.166.187.
MPAA:198.70.114.0-198.70.114.2
MPAA:209.67.0.0-209.67.255.255
NetPD:207.155.
NetPD:128.241.0.0-128.241.2
UnknownC&DCop:64.106.170.128-64.106.170.19
BayTSP:209.204.128.0-209.204.191.255
Vidius:20
GAIN(spyware):64.94.8
GAINCME(spyware):66.35.247.0-66.
GAINCME(spyware):66.35.229.0-66.35.229
MediaDefender:64.225.292.0-64.225.292.127
R
Xupiter.com:63.23
Xupiter.com(mirror):63.208.235.30
BSA (?) 208.121.215.0-208.121.215.255 (Not sure)
PC emulation software: http://bochs.sf.net/
PC virtualisation software: www.plex86.org
plex86.org seems to be down at the moment
Many DVD disks include "InterActual" (previously known as "PC Friendly") software which is autorun upon DVD insertion on Windows machines. To the typical home consumer, the message presented appears as if it originated from the PC itself, prompting the user to install the software in order to view the DVD content.
There are several issues with this, and relavent to the topic of "illegitimacy of spyware":
1. "InterActual" doesn't actually install an MPEG2 decoder filter, it merely uses the existing filter provided with a new PC
2. "InterActual" software attempts to redirect the user to whatever content is available online relating (or not) to the title being viewed - spam essentially
3. "InterActual" assigns itself as the default DVD playback application in Windows, and thus the user is subjected to the inferior quality of the DVD navigation software
4. "InterActual", if the user performs the standard "click-thru" agreement to watch their DVD content, broadcasts information about what DVD content the user views
Suffice to say, these points are easily discovered with a Google search, so I'll refrain from excessive linking and leave further research to the reader.
Now, for the more-than-capable user (read: most of you reading this), an explanation for preventing/disabling/uninstalling this spyware is obviated. But as the initiated, it's our duty to explain this to those who may not understand (read: friends, neighbors, family) what happens with spyware such as "InterActual" software.
On a personal note: After purchasing my last PC from Dell (please no "Dude" jokes) and inserting a DVD disk, it presented me with a dialog informing me that "InterActual" software was attempting to install and overwrite my settings, and gave me the option to block "InterActual" from installing on my machine. As expected, content is played through the standard DVD software provided by the OEM and I don't have to see that annoying banner anymore when I insert an "InterActual" or "PC Friendly Enabled!" disk.
Cheers!
J. Esterhaus
If you're got problems with pop-ups or advertising on your desktop, you don't own it. Microsoft or Apple owns it and they leased it to you.
So, quit your bitching and download an operating system of your very own already. As long as you're borrowing someone elses' why should you expect to control what it does?
If tits were wings it'd be flying around.
First they say we can't play CDs in our computers (evil pirates that we are), then they want us to play them in our computers so that they can track what we are(not) buying.
If "everyone gets their music from {insert current trendy P2P app here}", then who is going to buy these CDs so they can get more advertising fodder?
Won't my Microsoft Windows "Palladium" PC stop my 13 year old son from installing garbage like this on the home PC, saving our household from having our privacy viloated.
Microsoft legally can do this because they own the software but not my hardware. Very cleaver workaround. My guess is the this company has a similiar saying claiming that its their software and god given right to do whatever they want because of it. If you do not like then don't use it!
I agree that something needs to be done. Pallidium will be very chilling since ms will now own the cpu and all the hardware as well as the software.
http://saveie6.com/
Besides, I don't take any of that garbage. Both of my home networks, which are physically separated for paranoia purposes, must pass through a two-stage firewall system powered by four separate OpenBSD boxen (two for each network's firewall). The configuration of these firewalls has evolved over three years' time, but suffice it to say that I feel relatively comfortable knowing that any site that is not specifically white-listed will NOT get accessed by any of my machines, nor will any whitelisted machines get accessed for protocols which I have not specifically allowed. The advantage here is that NO software is going to report JACK SCHITT about my behavior to NO marketer.
One final note: I am a marketer by profession. B2B, specifically. And I refuse to employ any big-brother techniques in my work. This may be more difficult when marketing to enormous herds of stupid, technologically illiterate masses of IDIOTS, where you need to be stupid like that to make any sales. But I don't give a damn. I'm doing my part to avoid world-wide slavery by not doing that garbage myself.
WAR IS PEACE.
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY.
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH.
If the record companies make CD to be defective on normal users' PCs, users who don't know how to circumvent copy protection and firewall themselves, then they put in spyware on it hoping to gather statistics on them each time they play it on their PCs... Sounds rather catch-22 to me...
Sometimes I wish I was a plumber, then I'd know how to deal with other people's shit.
Go to Options - Preferences - Setup. The last checkbox is "Allow Winamp to report basic, anonymous program usage information".
Most mp3 players have something like this, to a greater or lesser extent.
I'm also amazed that the allegedly technical slashdot audience has not yet figured out that in order for these "bandlink" CDs to work, the user would need to install special software on their machine. I mean, read the fucking site. These "bandlink" CDs don't do squat unless the user specially and deliberately installs the software.
It is very clear that this is not some sort of behind the seems privacy invasion but an above board trading of information for privacy. (Which, indeed, has issues of its own, but...) Other companies (Real, Musicmatch, etc.) do worse right now.
The cake is a pie
Receantly, they have rather changed teh focus of their firewall,a nd I feel the new versions aren't as good as the old ones. However another company, Kerio, is now making Kerio Personal Firewall which seems ot be just like the old Tiny. www.kerio.com.
Don't like this bandlink crap?
Write a distributed denial of accuracy program (DDOAP) so that anyone who wants to corrupt the bandlink statistics can download and run your program in the background and every hour or so it will send out information to bandlink telling them you are listening to some high-brow band nobody's ever heard of.
Next thing you know, They Might Be Giants will get a record deal for $30M an album...
"Geez, how many times can one guy listen to CowboyNeal Sings Manilow?"
<Troy McClure Voice>Shhhh! Let's just let that one be our little secret, shall we?</Troy McClure Voice>
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
"Microsoft legally can do this because they own the software but not my hardware. Very cleaver workaround. My guess is the this company has a similiar saying claiming that its their software and god given right to do whatever they want because of it. If you do not like then don't use it!"
You'll find that this was my point, *and* my solution. Don't use windows. Don't use Palladium. Resist.
Of course you are the only one that can determine the extent to which you consider *your* system your property, and to what extent you are willing to accept certain *percieved* deprivations for forsaking Windows.
Me, I consider freedom and functional ownership of my own system and data a *feature.* One which MS cannot, and will not, match.
If this means I can't play the latest game with latest invasive EULA, well, there *are* other games.
For that matter Linux can do nearly anything Windows can ( And the odd holes are being filled with amazing rapidity),BUT - you have to be willing to make the step of being willing to realize that Linux does so *differently.*
This is the step that many are not willing to make. In fact, many are so tied to the Windows way of doing things that they believe that if Linux doesn't accomplish the *same end* in the *same way* it doesn't do it at all.
There really is a "Windows way" and a "Unix philosophy." When in Rome you'll get along better if you do as the Romans. Life really is just as livable in other cultures, even computer cultures.
KFG
format C:
"Some fight for law. Some fight for justice. What will you fight for? One day, you will see."
the CD player knows too much...
It seems to me that if you are running a non-windows operating system or if you just don't install their software that it is just a normal cd with a useless filesystem on it filled with useless files.
The Farewell Tour II
Don't block its packet with a firewall. Rather, set up a clone on each machine you own and start sending fake information. We might get rid of Britney Spears and the like if the spyware tells them that 80% of consumers listen to Classical and Progressive Rock.
Users don't have to sign any eulas or sign any agreements...the thing can probably install invisibly and quickly without the user even noticing, especially on todays uber-machines.
You know, I think I was right to buy this router...I may be needing it (as supposed to being glad it's there) within the coming year or 2.
Candy-Coated Knowledge
--OOOOh! i'm being FUCKED by the recording industry -- atleast i'm still loosened up thanks to the motion picture biz.
\\vectorhead\\
The CD is a "dead" media, it's not something that magically comes to life and starts transmitting information.
You know, that's just what I used to tell people about email. Remember the Good Times "virus"? I don't know how many emails I sent to people in the mid-nineties explaining to them that emails were just text and weren't "executed" in any way and thus were incapable of harming your computer. Just like (as my example went at the time) no audio CD, no matter how malicious, could contain instructions that could break your CD player.
Well, guess what? Now everyone* uses an email client that defaults to executing, without notification, code embedded in received emails. By changing the rules, they made a liar out of me in less than six years (the "Good Times" hoax first appeared in December of 1994; the "Love Letter" email worm appeared in May of 2000).
And in five or ten years, who knows? Maybe everyone* will be running CD player applications that default to "facilitating said information gathering and transmission".
You and I know better, and this doesn't personally affect us. But that doesn't change the fact that the estimated economic impact of the Love Bug was over $8 billion. Mind you, this is from something I thought was patently impossible a few years earlier.
Never say never.
* not everyone
Graham "Teach" Mitchell, computer science teacher, Leander HS
Someone said it best in a previous reply to this topic. Yall are some "Tin foil hat wearing" idiots.
This software is tracking little more then aggregate web hits but already you guys are arranging bus boycotts and software exploits.
Does Slashdot count user hits? Does every website count hits?
You guys bitch when they take away music (napster), you bitch when they threaten to restrict your CD (encryption), and you bitch when they give you a bonus CD extra to collect some feedback about which songs are crap.
Did it ever occur to you that "It ain't about you" but maybe, just maybe about selling more CDs?
Does anyone care what the "tin foil brigade" is bitching about?
Damn, I am a musician and the idea that I might even have a clue about my fans is not a "BAD" thing.
You guys could go back to reading comic books in the relatively secure environment of "under your blanket with just a flashlight.
okay, so I was bored tonight...
It appears this software is from: Javakitty Media Inc. in Atlanta, GA.
The terms of usage clearly state the aggregation of information including machine specs, etc.
The 'blink.exe' program appears to use libexpat.dll for XML parse functionality and for chatting with users using Jabber.
Oddly enough, when the program starts it first tries port 80 (HTTP) on www.microsoft.com and if that fails, it tried www.amazon.com. I guess to verify a valid HTTP connection.
Then it sends XML info back to uma.javakitty.com:8080 with various user content and song info. It logs in with username 'jared' and a trivially encrypted passwd.
Finally, there appears to be some funky access with an MFC42 (ordinal 0x0219) call with a file 'C:\temp.dat' first with www.chironexsoftware.com and then with www.google.com.
But wait there's more...
the final twist is that chironexsoftware.com is registered to the author of this software...
Registrant:
jared allen
65 Koola st , wishart
Brisbane NA 4122
Brisbane, NA 4122
AU
33432174
I wonder if he's using this software to pump hits to google for his own website? Hmmm
Now, time to remove this crap from my computer....
whoah. dude.
dig this excerpt, emphasis added:
so...let's just say for a moment that the softrware is _not_ intrusive, and they have - let's be charitable for a moment - taken measures to prevent data mining. they can foist a modified version on me, along with a modified EULA, or just tell me that a modified version is available, and i have to either (a) bend over and take it, and say i like it, or (b) stop using it.
staying with the previous version is not an option.
I wonder who their alleged lawyers are. They should know that it's not legal to read microsoft's mail.
united states nuclear device terrorist bioweapon encryption cocaine korea syria iran iraq columbia cuba
Claim copyright on your playlist and then prosecute 'em for piracy of your IP.
Unless the CD indicates it sends data back to a server, this is in clear violation of U.S. Privacy laws (which anyone who works in the software industry should know all about).
What really cracks me up is how this "holier-than-thou" sentiment is lavashed in a forum where we think it is important to be the bigger nerd but what I'd really like to know is how many of you tell your grandma/mother/aunt/girlfriend/whatever that they're an idiot for not keeping up with PC security, or for not patching their OS (what?!?! your grandma doesn't use Linux! What a fucking moron! I'm glad she's not related to me...). Gimme a break folks. How many of you immediately turned around and issued a security bulletin to your family about this horrid new CD technology. I can see it now..."I repeat, DO NOT INSERT THE CD INTO YOUR COMPUTER'S CD DRIVE!!! If you feel unsafe or unsure whether or not you are using one of these new CDs, please contact my secretary, er answering machine and schedule an appoint, er leave a message and I'll set a time for me to do a security visit with you to ensure you are not in any DANGER. I repeat you morons, DO NOT INSERT THE CD INTO YOUR COMPUTER'S CD DRIVE!!!! (yes grandma, this means you too)." Get real guys.
Perhaps. But on the other hand, it could just be that most people are incompetent at their jobs, driving, and whatever else.
To wit: the left lane on a road is for passing. Most states have laws that restrict the distance that a driver can drive in the left lane before moving over. If you've ever driven long-distance, you know that there are those who insist on indefinately going limit plus 5 (or worse yet: limit) in the left lane. And no, I'm not breaking the law if I try to pass, I live in a prima facie state.
Second: Examine for a moment a Motorola v60c. The earlier versions are the best example of this. The antenna easily bends in one's pocket. (They've fixed this with new antenna revs.) Worse, when extended, the antenna acts as a lever for the (bulky) antenna tip to use to exert massive force against the rest of the antenna. Net result: three antenna breaks in 6 months, two in-pocket.
Third: Went to a fast food place looking for food and directions to a gas station. Someone (A) is trying to help me out by asking someone else (B). A: "you familiar with (cityname)?" B: "yeah, kinda" A: "are there any gas stations near here?" B: "whatcha looking for?" A: "gas"
There's far, far more. These are the easy examples. But if you can honestly say you have not run across any stupidity in the past week, good for you! You're a far more patient being than I.
Incidentally, I don't mean to disparage those who can't use computers. I can't perform brain surgery; just because others have no expertise in my area doesn't make them idiots. But when people cannot do their jobs or comprehend basic English (where English is their native language)...
Life is good.
it looks as if most have not used the software, so I will add my two cents as a user.
The software plays the CD, displays content about each song as it plays, and you can chat with other fans. Not Great, but not bad.
I would imagine without being too technical, that in order to show the lyrics for the "current song playing" that they are at least submitting a request for information.
In terms of personal information, I have seen only a user profile for the chat, and a mailing list option.
Seems pretty benign since you don't need to use the software to play the CD. But if you agree to the terms of the EULA then what is the problem?
Didn't anybody read the link ?? (Now *that* was a stupid question !!!)
There is a small data partition on the CD and MS Windows will "autorun" a program on it. This program will present the user with the Bandlink license and the install the monitoring software on the user's PC. (Windows only).
Now take a look at the Slashdot story : your new music disc may be transmitting your listening habits in real time to the respective record company.
Bullshit !
echo '[q]sa[ln0=aln80~Psnlbx]16isb572CCB9AE9DB03273snlbxq' |dc
When I first saw this, I thought there was some kind of "Magic" CD technology which defeats a users option to say no.
Total and complete bullshit. This is some enhanced CD software with auto-run (which can easily be disabledd) and you idiots are yelling "FIRE" in a crowded theatre.
Slow night in the news room.
While I agree the music industry is out of control, I really don't see what the issure is here. If I understand correctly it tracks, 1) what cd/tracks you listen to, and 2) when you listen to them. And I would assume it does this by IP, platform, etc.
How is this any diffrent than when I log onto netscape or google, they track when I log on, and various other information? Such CD tracking seems only a natural progression in information networking.
And to say nothing about the massive amounts of information a credit card or 'preffered buyer' card can track, knowing what I buy when, and my age. And music CD's are no less optional to consume than a credit card.
I don't see why this is a problem. If the program accesses data asside from my IP, or information I directly give it, there is a problem.
But if the company knows my name and what CD I listen to when... I don't care. Such information cannot be used against me, it only shows that my computer was indeed playing the CD, and not that I was. And hey if they can verify it was indeed you it would make a great aliby in court...
Copy protection blocking access to my files to make MP3s is wrong, but I really don't see how this is. It would seem to be part of the information age.
Anyone up for packet-sniffing the protocol and sending me the results? I'd be more than happy to write a Python and/or Ocaml client to spout random statistics back. Maybe we could set up a website with teams and stuff, keeping track of the total number of fake listening hours reported. (Of course, there'd be lots of cheating on those stats, but what do you expect when you're trying to keep track of self-reported cheating stats?)
Copyright Violation:"theft, piracy"::Anti-Trust Violation:"thermonuclear price terrorism"<-Overly dramatic language.
Well,
"Half of them are dumber than that."
actally, some of that half could be equally dumb.
But i agree on using the median and not the average.
(because of the uneaqual distribution.)
Why are other peoples sig's always more witty ???
Don't know what you're smoking, but "basic property rights" are signed away by contract every day, and there's nothing illegal about it. Sale, lease, rent...
Maybe your "common sense" is a non-sens for some other people. I guess all of those you find stupid think the same thing of you. Maybe it's just people don't have the same priorities and values. Just a question of perception.
Ok. So, right now you don't see the need for privacy. Can you be sure that it will stay that way for ever? Can you vouch for every future government in your lifetime?
I don't see any reason why we should help build an infrastructure that would be every despotic governments wet dream. Like that Ben Franklin chap said; "He who gives up basic freedom for a little temporary safety deserves neither liberty nor safety".
Btw, this is way off-topic. I don't care about industries trying to get usage statistics. If people really want to worry, there are more important things to worry about.
How small a thought it takes to fill a whole life
I think the problem is not that poeple don't have a firewall or poeple don't know what they are doing it's the fact that 90% of dumb fucks using a computer are also using MS shitty products wich in turn loves to install other shitty products. I think it's time for everybody to stop crying like bitches an spend some time getting a real OS on their pc's. Good luck
make: warning clock skew detected
Bandlink is designed to be run simply by inserting the CD into a Windows Compatible PC
My PC is a Windows Compatible PC.
I installed it once.
Do Bandlink works inserting the CD into my Suse 8.0?
I think not.
Exactly. And just because someone doesn't know how to set up, or even obtain a firewall which can stop outgoing packets from certian hardware/software, it doesn't mean they don't deserve the same privacy rights as us
The only time a music CD spends in my PC is to get converted to MP3. This file goes into my jukebox, which does not have an external connection anywhere.
The original CD is played in my HiFi, as required. Sounds much better there anyway - and guess what, it doesn't have an outside connection, either.
Ciao,
Klaus
Free PC version of ChipWits at http://www.breueronline.de/klaus/chipwits/
The 10 page license agreement is a product of the flawed and money-oriented law(yer) system of the US. That made it necessary, because americans believe they have a "right" to sue anyone over anything. It is only a matter of self-protection.
:)
Companies only use that to their advantage to sneak in extra stuff, since they need those ten pages anyways. Now this is bad, but the license preceeds this abuse, just as the lawsuit abuse preceeds the licenses.
Hell, it is almost impossible to make heads or tails out of even the simplest of the free licenses, because they need to cover all possible holes.
Can't someone come up with a "Common sense license", or even better a "Common sense law". Of course, that would imply that there is such a thing as "Common sense", which I am starting to seriously doubt.
Just disable auto-insert notification in Windows, or disable the CD-autorun using a program like TweakUI.
Ofcourse this won't work if the CD has a copy protection scheme which forces you to run a program from the disc in order to play it..
Slashdot community, please notice: I am looking for a girlfriend.
Nave H. Weiss
Just how many people have their PCs online ALL THE TIME?? I have mine on for a few minutes , download my email , surf slashdot then disconnect. Then I do some work and maybe play a CD. If you keep your PC online the whole time you'll have far worse problems to worry about than some spyware CD program phoning home. For crying out loud , the solution is so simple , switch off your modems! Jeez...
Send them messages as executables/javascript. They have to click OK to read your messages to them.
Have fun thinking up EULAs.
I think FreeBSD's ipfw can do that too.
Actually, InterActual has bettered its ways a lot with 2.04 (maybe earlier, haven't seen 2.01 to 2.03 myself) -- it is perfectly clear to anyone with half a brain now that the InterActual player is _only_ for the additional features.
It no longer by default takes over as your standard DVD player, and the uninstall now cleans up all its mess.
A huge step up from IAplayer 2.0 and PC Friendly.
I hit "submit." Preview doesn't help if your brain is simply out to lunch. Perhaps I need an editor.
Book authors don't typically have this problem because they've got people to tell them they're being a "doofus" *before* they publish.
KFG
Of course there's another option. *Don't use EULAed software.*
good idea, but that rules out the bigger of the linux distros then.
redhat- HAS EULA on the cd pouch when you buy it.
SuSe - EULA
Lindows - well it really isnt a big distro.. slackware users outnumber this one 5 to 1.
licoris - well yeah... same as above....
Basicaly as linux users we should have a ZERO tolerance to Eula's on anything that is linux. and yes that meant taking a direct shot at redhat.
REDHAT makers... why do you have a eula? why did I have to return the package to the store? I wanted to buy it, but I refused to agree to your eula printed on the install discs envelope..
I loved redhat very much, it's great for the newbie and corperate... but the Eula makes me want to stay away from it.
Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
...with strange sets of numbers as names.
Would those start with S1 and contain a lot of dashes? That would be the Computer Security Identifier, and you can (and probably should) alter it to a random string by using NewSID.
**Everytime**, your computer makes a tcp/ip connection to anyother network device, your IP address is sent (baring intentional spoofing by you). That is part of why tcp is better than udp. Are you new or what?
Of course there's another option. *Don't use EULAed software.*
Hey Taco, how about a Im/practical subject mod?
That way I could mod the above post, +5 Impractical
"Teachers leave us kids alone
Fair enough -- I haven't used ZA.
Try this, though.
Modify PATH to be prefixed with directory foo, owned by you. Drop that modified msvcrt.dll into said directory. Execute a trusted app, which uses the original binary. One way or another, it's going to be possible to force ZA to deal with libraries. This is actually easier than the first thing I suggested.
May we never see th
no, the left lane is for going faster than the right lane. At any time.
The only rule you and everyone else needs to worry about is: if you are blocking left lane traffic, get the FUCK over into the right lane until that traffic passes.
no one gives a shit about some bullshit driving-distance law. cops certainly don't.
MSDN says that PATH is searched well after the others.
There is a quite possible exploit, though...we just need an unregistered library that's been dumped in the system or windows dir that a trusted app links against.
The linking search order for unregistered libraries is:
1) executable dir. This is safe -- we assume that the admin set up this system so that the user doesn't have write perms here.
2) The current directory -- that's going to tear things. All we have to do is leave a modified unregistered dll in the current dir, and execute a trusted app using its full path from there. *That* will link against the evil code and get full network access unless the ZA people are doing a lot more loader-level crap that I'd suspect they are.
3, 4, 5)...
Who at Microsoft came up with the idea of using the *current directory* before the system dir and windows dir, anyway? I can't think if any scenerio where that would be particularly justified...
May we never see th
Linux is imune , tada tada .Oww yes linux is Immune .weee dont get spyware---no wee dont get spyware .
*The Linux Song*
How are they going to use this? Since there new goal is to make cd's unplayable on computers.. sounds like something only a record company would do..
They can try and get there statistics thru my Security.
Try this one, i havent seen an advert in months, blocks spyware,adverts,dialer droppers
its massive (16,000 entries i think)
http://www.remember.mine.nu/
oh and put your checkbook away cos its free
systrace seems like a good solution for Unix-like OS's.
Forgive me for being cynical, but I think the recording industry's concern with what happens to music CDs that wind up in computers has nothing to do with listening habits. Given that most CDs are probably not played in computers, and that a particular sort of customer listens to CDs in their computer, you will probably not get valid marketing information from such a technology.
If you want to catch someone ripping MP3z, however, this is a pretty good way to do it.
The median IS a form of average.
== Jez ==
Do you miss Firefox? Try Pale Moon.
Yeah, but it's very unlikely that you will be able to *legally* view DVD content using Linux.
== Jez ==
Do you miss Firefox? Try Pale Moon.
Not surprising. Cops in America don't seem to prosecute ANY drivers. If you're in a car, you're virtually immune from the law. Hell, when I went over there, half the cars didn't even have numberplates!!! If you didn't have numberplates at the front and rear of the car here (UK), you'd be stopped by the police in 5 seconds.
== Jez ==
Do you miss Firefox? Try Pale Moon.
No wonder InterActual won't install on My machine. My firewall doesn't allow it. And I jsut thought it was the budget motherboard that wasn't compatible.
Given 10 IQs:
80, 90, 90, 120, 130, 140, 150, 160, 170, 180
The median is 90, and only one person has a lower IQ.
The mean is 131, and in this case exactly half are below that and half are above.
I can't believe there are so many people saying that it's not a big deal. It's not the loss of anything, it's the principle of the thing. We all know that if if you give em an inch... they'll take a mile. If you happily agree to give them stats for FREE, they will push it and pretty soon they'll be selling your stats to someone somewhere, making money off of you not only from the CD you bought, but from your stats.
I think the least they could do is GIVE you the CD and they make their money off of the stats.
The big deal is that you're just a number to them, you're just an income source and by participating, you're encouraging the process. This process is not in your favor, why help it?
Personally, I don't play many cd's on the computer. I buy a cd, make a cd backup, make mp3s and transfer to MD, from there the CD goes on the shelf. If I find spyware on my computer I rip out all traces, put in blocks for future, and write a nasty-gram to the owners.
A lot of people are too willing to give up their privacy for some little or never used benefit (like "chatting" about a cd). Is that worth it?
The price we pay for immortality... is death. Narnia The Great Fall
Nope, the mode is 90. The median is 135.
This is my World Wide Web of Whatever
...And no, I'm not breaking the law if I try to pass, I live in a prima facie state.
What's that, Latin for "Speeding allowed?"
I notice that there needs to be some kind of agreement by the user for the activity that takes place on the computer. This due to the fact that many countries have privacy laws that 'should' protect privacy of it's inhabitants. Usually this agreement with the user is gained by large user agreements in a language that is only understood by lawyers, so it's what they are doing is totally legal. So will we now also get license agreements when buying CDs..where we allow the record labels to execute code on our machine and track our habbits. And I've a feeling that they will try to hide more spyware that for example searches your computer for mp3's and sends that information to the record label or RIAA ..
Or possibly deletes all the MP3s of your computer?
I know one thing ... as soon as CD's will be guided with license agreements I will not buy any cd anymore!
and exactly what state were you visiting? Also, try showing up near the END of the month.. cops gotta make they're quotas after all, and will happily pull you over for doing stupid crap on the road. I've yet to see cars without license plates that weren't stolen.. or maybe you were just attending a demolition derby?
Oh god... not again.
There really isn't a big reason to be paranoid about it, they already have the biggest usage statistic they want: SALES! What more do they really care about?
"We shall party like the Greeks of old! You know the ones I mean." - HedonismBot
Badlink (and likely other companies like them) are exploring the landscape looking for viable ways to get this demographic data. They may succeed. Here on
On the other hand, as an artist, I would like to see some availability of tracking in a macro sense. Nothing personally identifying (perhaps have a standard that dictates that you can gather data, but not tie it to a human), but it would be nice to see if people listen to a specific track on a CD in it's entirety; whether it's more popular in one region than in an other.
Again, tying such data to a specific person is scummy. Perhaps someone could dig up the medical records for the CEO / President of BadLink and mail 7000 boxes of photocopies of it to the company receptionist for distribution to all their business partners. Not that I'd do such a thing...
www.dedserius.com
VB != VisualBasic
Again, I am glad this is happening. All Nsync fans should be spyed on. The "biggest" record label I listen to is Warp records. Gotta say the new squarepusher is brilliant.
M$ loves this kind of thing. So do many other software creators in that camp. They (and the companies backing them, driven by stockholders seeking cash revenues) think that they will learn how to draw more interest from you, by learning what you like to do when online and when on PC (but not online). In their licenses, the users usually give permission for information to be transmitted, if, in fact, you click to accept the terms of the license. Doesn't matter if can you read and understand the obfuscation of terms. So no matter who is above or below average, if you don't read the license, you are likely going to grant permission for this to happen.... so why whine about it? If you do not like this tactic, learn to ask questions before you download or install the thieving boogers. And remember: M$ never tells you you fly is down, you have to learn to prohibit open ports, learn to block unwanted transmission of data. Every time someone clicks ok without knowing what, exactly, the software is going to do, they are placing blind trust that the provider of the software is not malicious. We all hear that this is not true, but the next answer will surprise you: 'What can I do about it.... this is all there is!'. 'Resistance is futile'. 'FUD'. Call it what you want, but people are convinced there is nothing they can do about it, they do not know there is an alternative, and from my perspective, I agree that the common M$ user would need an asociates degree in system administration to void such junk research. But the are defeatists by TRAINING. The family which is not Computer administration savvy is a popular entity, not as rare as you'd think. I'd conclude that the commercial $$$ driven developers are simply capitalizing on the ignorance of the consumer. But you knew that.
I'm not talking about (stateful) firewalls; I wouldn't expect my family, friends, or other average users to understand those concepts. I was talking in a somewhat more general sense (the thread was about "average idiots", no?).
What I was referring to is the sheer number of people who routinely do stupid things. Be it work-related, traffic, personal (social), or other; people do not think things through. People who use hair dryers in the shower, who apply make-up, eat, read a newspaper, use their laptop, etc. while driving 100KM/h on the freeway, or those who can't understand that smoking while filling their car's gas tank isn't a terribly good idea, and that creating personal rocket projection systems to propell themselves into their cottage lake is probably inadviseable, or that standing in the middle of a doorway, contemplating life and their surroundings in a busy hallway isn't quite considerate or practical, or that speaking loudly on a cell phone in a movie theatre, exclaiming things like "Sorry, the sound is too loud, I can't hear you!" will probably incite rage in the other movie goers, or all the ladies (term used loosely, if you'll pardon the pun) who get surprised that, after having unprotected sex with several men and find themselves either sporting a child or an STD (nb; it's entirely common that the surprise child will be the second, third, or fourth), or the people who don't 'get' that drinking a pair of 40oz bottles of [insert favourite alcoholic beverage here] will quite possibly find them in the hospital spitting up blood and fragments of their stomach.
There are, of course, infinitely more examples, but I think they limit the upper size of these comments somewhere (and $DEITY forbid I should create a database size overflow or something. ;) )
But to get back to this thread - people who do not understand [cars|computers|electronics|mechanical devices] yet who insist upon taking them apart and/or servicing themselves, then blaming the manufacturer/retailer for selling them defective equipment. Or worse - people who don't understand these things and go against the advise of a trained professional and cause serious detriment for themselves and/or others around them.
As to the above references to my parents/grandparents; I do tell them what I think when they try to crack their computers and/or administer the installed software. It took me about five years, but my family finally understands that when they do something to the computer, it generally goes wrong and they need my help to fix it. When I do something to the computer, it works, because I do this for a living and know what I'm doing. Generally they feed me and keep my [coffee|beer] [cup|glass] full for my trouble, and everybody's happy.
The difference being, of course, my family smartened up - other people don't.
One of the higher standards I try to hold people to, and I realize it sounds horribly cliche, is to know one's limitations. For example, I know that I can change my oil (and filter), top up my fluids, and perform other small routine maintainance tasks on my car. I probably could figure my way through brakes or other aspects, but I don't. Instead, I leave it up to the trained mechanics who have years of experience and industry certifications that say they can do the job properly.
Another standard I hold people to, for those who are definately literate, is to read atleast the basic instructions before desperately phoning for help. I can't count the times I've had to help people (or been asked and refused) because they wouldn't open the fold-out "Step By Step" instruction set that came with their new purchase. The fact that many of the installations I've performed were insultingly simple is beside the point; the instructions spelled it out so clearly that a child could figure it out. This excuse adults use that technology is so complex that only the younger generations have a chance is complete rhetoric, and complete nonsense. If a University educated individual can't figure out how to connect something with colour-coded, size-differentiated connectors that are labelled at both ends and comes with a step-by-step instruction manual; something's wrong.
So no, I don't expect that people will understand stateful packet inspection, ingres/egres filtering, bogon filters, application versus network versus physical layer differentiation, or any of the other industry specific jargon I could name; but I do expect people to be able to perform in real life without their hands being held, lest they should manage to kill or maim themselves or someone around them in the process.
BD Phone Home!
Shameless plug. Like you weren't expecting it.
So what? Just because there are *legal* implications doesn't mean people won't do it.
I loved redhat very much, it's great for the newbie and corperate... but the Eula makes me want to stay away from it.
Could you be so kind as to briefly summarize what you don't like about the EULA for those of us who avoid Red Hat?
The price of freedom is eternal litigation.
Wow...I actually get to see the "Slashdot Math Effect" in action. Sweet...
Restaraunt experience: Waitress: Hi there, have you decided on what you would like to eat? Cust1: Yes, I'll have the Phil's Mix please. Waitress: Pancakes, Waffles or French toast? Cust1: French toast please. Waitress: And how would you like your eggs? Cust1: Over easy please. Waitress: Thank you. And what can I get for you? Cust2: Exactly the same thing please. Waitress: Same thing? Cust2: Yes please. Waitress: French toast as well? Cust2: Yes please. Waitress: How would you like your eggs? Cust2: Over easy please. Waitress: Thank you.
Here are some of the more prominent cases dealing with Eulas
ProCd v. Zeidenbeg, 86 F.3d 1447
Hill v. GateWay 2000, 105 F.3d 1147
Klocek v. Gateway, 104 F.Supp.2d 1332
I included the citation if anyone has access to Westlaw or Lexisnexus. But these cases give an idea of how courts Translate Eulas. There is inconsistency across Regions, so eventually I am sure there will be some Supreme court case on it. I have not researched cases in the last two years though. This are from 2000 and before. But interesting nonetheless
A point whic is very unlikely to actually matter to anyone.
Until attempts are made to catch, arrest, and charge people with the "crime" of watching a DVD on their Linux box, the question over whether it is legal or not is a moot point.
Someone pointed out to me the other day an old military maxim... Never give an order that you know wont be followed, it only undermines your authority.
-Steve
"I opened my eyes, and everything went dark again"
Every CD player that conntacts the CDDB or Freedb submits information about what you are listening to. All websites track what links you click.
None of the companies can do so without your user activity so if it bothers you, don't do it.
Besides, what information can be accessed from your computer? Credit Card numbers? Photos of Teenage boys? Tax Records.... wait a minute... teenage boys? Is that what has you all down?
I'm thinking that hosts file listings of servers that are often targets of this sort of thing might be a good idea. I'd love to see a web site where I could download the latest list of hosts that privacy advocates would prefer to see denied.
It was a joke! When you give me that look it was a joke.
In the agreement they say that
In the event that CD Intelligence terminates this EULA, you must immediately stop using the SOFTWARE and destroy all copies of the SOFTWARE and all of its component parts.
We have come to destroy all copies of the SOFTWARE. Resistance is futile!
...so long as the record company starts sending me compensation for the bandwidth they utilized.
Darn post key...
It was a joke! When you give me that look it was a joke.
Having not read the Bandlink website, if I were going to design something like this, I'd do it thusly, assuming a Win32 (9x/ME/NT/2K/XP) machine:
* The data track would be the last track on the disk, not the first as most combination CDs are, so playing in a normal CD player wouldn't alert the user. Al Yankovic's Running With Scissors CD is one such disk.
* The autorun program would launch the default CD player (either by doing a "start (trackno).cda" or by poking in the Registry to find out what the player is), thereby not triggering any installation monitors.
* The program would then monitor the CD-ROM device somehow, through ASPI or a similar interface (NT SCSI direct like NTBACKUP uses?) so it knows what tracks are being played regardless of what software's playing them.
* Phone home to a host answering on Port 80, which no one blocks anyway.
It could be defeated by using a digital read/playback CD player as the default, like Windows Media Player's, but WMP's so abusable it's not funny. And even then a CD-ROM monitor could pick up what track is being read if not played.
Use Evolution instead of Outlook? Bewa
The grinning face of corporate techno-fascism
shines throughout the whole website of this
web spy.
Some of those cars probably did have numberplates (license plates), but they were only on the back. Different states have different rules. I know that Illinois and Pennsylvania only require plates on the back. In my home state of New Jersey, you must have them on both sides and a tax disc (actually a square) on your inner windshield. If you're a New Jersey resident with only one license plate on, you are very likely to get pulled over.
Bill Clinton: Pimp we can believe in. - The Shirt!!!
"To wit: the left lane on a road is for passing. Most states have laws that restrict the distance that a driver can drive in the left lane before moving over. If you've ever driven long-distance, you know that there are those who insist on indefinately going limit plus 5 (or worse yet: limit) in the left lane. And no, I'm not breaking the law if I try to pass, I live in a prima facie state."
If you drive over the speed limit, you ARE breaking the law. Even if you're passing. Go to a driver's ed. class and ask if you don't believe me.
It seems to me that Windows, especially in the consumer domain, is becoming much more like TV. That is, television isn't a service provided to the viewers, it's a service provided to the marketers. The viewer's attention is the actual product which is being sold. The content on the television is not the primary business of television networks, selling advertisments is.
It seems like Windows is becoming the same way. The fact that a Windows computer can actually do useful things for the owner is becoming secondary to it's use as a vehicle for advertising and gathering marketing information. I think it's one of the things that turns me off the most about Windows, that constant feeling that you can't trust "your" computer at all, because you really can't. Every other program is co-opting "your" computer for the purpose of advertising to you. And it's not even just "free as in beer" software that does it, even stuff you paid good money for feels the need to steal your attention for advertisements. And they all, uniformly, require you to agree to EULA's.
It's one of the main reasons why I hope Linux never takes off on the desktop, because I don't want to have to deal with all that crap. Fortunately, one of Linux's strengths is that even if some distro does take over the desktop from Microsoft and inherits all the spy-ware and ad-ware, I can just run some other distro that doesn't suck. Not an option with Windows: they all suck.
So, if it's a separate application, why not just look at the task monitor in Windows and kill it?
Unless, of course, this is a "protected" CD which has its own built-in player and which wouldn't work with any other CD playing app. In which case it's going right back to the store for a refund...
My guess is if you don't install the software you can still use the CD just fine but the web page does not even seem to mention this possibility (after a breif look). I'm sure they can't imagine anyone not wanting to install this software.
Um, it's even harded to find out about eros-os when the site is down.
Lose essential liberties to get temporary safety = get only hassles and security theater.
What's the point of that post?
When their numbers dwindled from 50 to 8, the dwarves began to suspect Hungry.
Net result: three antenna breaks in 6 months, two in-pocket.
And you still haven't learned not to sit on your phone when it's in your pocket? Good example of incompetence.
clearly you've never been a waitron... what you've got posted here isn't evidence of idiocy, it's a transcript of an error correction algorithm
from the other side of the order pad (so to speak), the issue is that customers are the idoits...More often than not, "exactly the same" means "exactly the same, except...."
I can't even count the number of times somebody has ordered "exactly the same thing" and then sent it back their mind hadn't been read properly....
Errr, I don't know about you, but I live in a world that has little warning stickers that tell people not to put their hands or toes under lawn mowers while it is running. There are little signs on metal ladders that warn people not to lean them up against power lines. There is a sticker on the radiator cap on cars that warn people not to remove the cap when the radiator is hot.
This list goes on and on and on... and what this tells me is that not only have people been stupid enough to remove their own fingers and toes, electrocute themselves while trying to clean thier own gutters and scald themselves badly by opening a cap that has gallons of more than boiling hot water under pressure, but that they have then successfully sued the manufacturer of the product for their own stupidity and won the law suit.
Personally, I think that we should make things as deadly as possible to weed out the idiots. Hopefully before they breed. I think we should remove all warning signs and teach people how to think before they act.
Think of it as evolution in action.
Hell, do one better: Don't buy the CD with the stupid privacy idiocy on it, wait a day, and download the songs you want from P2P networks. The sooner the major music publishers go under, the sooner one of them will be forced to figure out a workable economic model that doesn't rely on legal strongarming and gives customers what they want instead of what the major labels think they SHOULD want.
Hey, we're the smart crowd. Why don't WE think up a good model, and sell it to them?
My idea is a rights-based model, where we buy a lifetime right to own a copy of a Copyrighted Work (for a bit less than the current going rate) and we're more or less left to our own devices to get that copy. If we want to brave P2P, great. If we want to pay the CD-press $5 for the CD, even better.
Sure, it's a potential loss of privacy--but I think we, as humans, can stand for a business to know who its customers are.
The point of my original reply was to show that a great many of the people we are calling idiots because they will likely fall for this evil market research scheme (or whatever the hell you wanna call it) will be those same people we hold dear and love -- our parents, grandparents, girlfriends and other friends & family that are not technically savy enough to keep up with the evil goings-on in the world of computers.
I'm sorry if you took my original reply as an attack on your post, somehow I doubt the people I really wanted to read my post will ever see it. Oh well.
not true. Arkansas and Indiana require only back plates, but Illinois requires both.
But you're missing the point... As technology becomes ever more integrated with our lives, the option of "just turn it off" becomes increasingly less possible. No, not from a technical perspective, but from a *social* perspective.
I think you're correct, this is not really a technological issue, it's a social one. A lot of the "privacy" and anonymity we imagine we have is an artifact of years of impersonal service and crude automation.
Three or four decades ago, all of the functions you name were handled by people. If you wanted to make a long-distance phone call you talked to an operator who took your information and connected you with the remote number. If you bought something, you usually dealt with a person across the counter, and if you lived in a small town or frequented the same shops that person probably recognized you, knew your family, your social standing, and what you liked to buy.
Now things are swinging back in that direction again. That kind of personal knowledge, since lost in the underflow of automation, is being extracted again by the current providers of those services. Is this a bad thing? Maybe, not not necessarily. I can't help but think that part of the reason that most people don't get too upset about losing thier pseudo-anonymity is because they never really cared that much to begin with.
Prima Facie Speed Limits: Numerical speed limits (statutory and posted) that, if exceeded, justify enforcement action. However, if the accused motorist's actions can be proven to be safe, reasonable and prudent for the prevailing conditions, the charge of speeding shall be dismissed by the court of jurisdiction.
h tm l
http://www.motorists.org/issues/speed/ModelLaw.
I actually read my state law out of law.cornell.edu.
On the contrary, some do.
http://www.bandlink.com/blink/players.cfm
Evidentally, you DON'T need to use their software to play the CD. Just another enhanced cd sounds like.
Just to fill you in, the left hand lane is not for passing. They are usually put in so that the people slowing for right hand turns don't impede the flow of traffic. You should probably be in the left lane unless you have a right hand turn coming up. On a freeway people driving slower than the traffic behind them, should move to the right. In fact it is probably difficult to drive in the right lane on most freeways since they usually require trucks to drive 55 (10 to 15 miles an hour lower than what a car is allowed to do) in the right hand lane.
Strange... my RedHat discs didn't have a EULA. Of course, I know how to download isos and burn them to disc (with my iBook, no less). There wasn't any EULA on the redhat ftp mirror I used.
"There is no mention of a opt in/opt out agreement when the cd is inserted on the website and none was displayed in a personal demonstration."
Then what do you call this:
Installation:
1. Insert you Bandlink CD into your Internet
Connected PC. (Bandlink should autostart on Windows).
2. Agree to the Bandlink License and
select "Connect" to install Bandlink.
3. Bandlink should detect your CD, begin CD
playback, and display artist content.
Vote for Pedro
This is just a pretty simple enhanced cd crap. you guys get worked up over nothing.
What chance does an unaugmented human have against such an apparatus?
Scientists restrict study to entire physical universe; creationist
You must have gone to a different America than the one I live in. People here get pulled over all the time, often for no good reason at all. And in the 20+ years I've lived here I've yet to see a single car on the road without a license plate.
Everyone thinks of themselves, and their own social groupings, as above average.
...Also, I didn't know Buggalo could fly.
To wit: the left lane on a road is for passing. Most states have laws that restrict the distance that a driver can drive in the left lane before moving over. If yu've ever driven long-distance, you know that there are those who insist on indefinately going limit plus 5 (or worse yet: limit) in the left lane. And no, I'm not breaking the law if I try to pass, I live in a prima facie state.
Highways are like socialism: they both work only in theory.
UNIX: Find it, fsck it, forget it.
So no, I don't expect that people will understand stateful packet inspection, ingres/egres filtering, bogon filters, application versus network versus physical layer differentiation, or any of the other industry specific jargon I could name...
:)
I think that with some thought, even a VB coder like myself can figure out most of those terms. But I knew I'd spent too much time online when the first one that my mind clearly identified was the Bogon Filter!
Yikes... have I spent so much time following random links in the Jargon File, that I've lost touch with the actual jargon of my chosen profession?
Moderators: I know, I'm straying off topic... I'm not using the +1, so please don't hurt me!
Stressed? Me? Of course not. Stress is what a rubber band feels before it breaks, silly.
It's also unlikely that families will be purchasing multiple copies of ms operating systems or ms office, or other ms applications, instead of copying them from one computer.
Once families are prevented from copying or "pirating" copies of ms os/applications through product activation and other methods, everyone will be running Gnu/Linux, and therefore, everyone will not be able to legally view DVDs on their Gnu/Linux systems, or something will change. Care to guess which?
Dude (just to spite you) Its about time manufacturers started looking out for the interests of their customers. That is very encouraging from Dell . .
Once families are prevented from copying or "pirating" copies of ms os/applications through product activation and other methods, everyone will be running Gnu/Linux, and therefore, everyone will not be able to legally view DVDs on their Gnu/Linux systems, or something will change. Care to guess which?
Actually, I beg to differ on your first point. I don't think the fact that they have to pay for 2 copies of Windows instead of 1 (actually many families only have 1 computer so nothing will change, and Windows/Office usually comes pre-installed on a 'joe sixpack' computer) will cause people to suddenly 'jump ship' to GNU/Linux. Most people don't even know what Linux is!!! They'll grumble but pay up, and MS knows that. I really don't think they'd be dumb enough to do something which would lose them their OS monopoly.
== Jez ==
Do you miss Firefox? Try Pale Moon.
Just ask where their sign is. http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/heresign.htm and for the record, sometimes, I am amazed at the levels of stupidity that run rampant through my large company. Whats even more amazing is the lack of patience for those perceived as "stupid". Yes stupid is funny (the link cracks me up), but it takes far more effort to ridicule someone than it does to teach them a thing or 3. I'd hate to see how people react when kids mess up...
I don't want the record industry to know which CD I play and at what time.
I believe they get enough info from the retailers anyway, there's no need for this.
The day Microsoft creates a product that doesn't suck, it will be known as the Microsoft Vaccuum Cleaner!
There are a number of tools available for removing spy-ware. just search download.com for something like spybot.... ....or move to linux.......
Elitism of one form or another is completely natural in any forum. Mechanics scoff at those who can't flush a radiator before their morning coffee, accountants laugh at people who can't balance their cheque books (letalone balance a company's budget), etc.. The geek community happens to harbour intelectual elitism.
It's a natural progression, too, since those attracted to the 'geeky' IT type professions tend to be of above average intellect (and quite often that results in sub-par social prowess; hence the stereotypes us hellishly cool geeks have to tolerate {cough} ), and many geeks take that for granted, some even get quite high and mighty over it. Hell, sometimes I've even been guilty of it. I doubt any of us are completely immune.
Now, as to whether the "Slashdot Community" is any form a representation of the true geek, or are somehow in a remarkable intellectual or career bracket; that's highly debateable. Slashdot has a definite reputation in the real (and even the uber-geek) world, and to a great extent it deserves it. This is an inflammatory forum frequented by many hot-tempered, lightening-tongue types who are quick to Google and use the dictionary and thesaurus in order to scald their opponants, and it puts forth a lot of arrogance. You'll never get an argument from me on that front. That's one reason for my philosophy of taking online forums with a very large particle of NaCl; Slashdot especially.
I tend to judge people on an independant basis; their Slashdot user ID is probably the furthest thing from my mind when doing so, let me assure you.
If they do stupid things, yes. Thankfully they don't often do stupid things (thanks in part to years of goading and conditioning, but I digress) so I don't have to.
Case in point; a friend of mine (who, incidentally, has about a decade more IT experience than I) recently was solicited by his father for some ISP advise. His father, upon hearing his advice, promptly went his own way. Havnig been a somewhat ongoing trend, he confronted his father about it, who had no response other than one to the effect of a shrug. See, my friend is the one who'll have to deal with his parents when their new ISP ("They're cheaper" was the justification) starts having technical difficulties - or worse - shuts down.
Much like mechanics will toss you a jug of water and a bag of cat litter, it's our job to educate those around us with the basic skillset that will help keep them safe out here in our turf. I try to keep my family abreast of the things they should watch out for, and as a result they no longer reply to "unsubscribe@spamemail.com" addresses, delete mail they know to be SPAM, don't forward chain letters or virus warnings, etc.
I don't teach them the OSI model or the structure of a TCP packet, I teach them the safeguards they should watch out for, and teach them the skills they need to answer questions they have on their own so they can broaden their knowledge and be more effective technologians.
</CORN>
BD Phone Home!
Shameless plug. Like you weren't expecting it.
How about not installing it in the first place that way you don't have to worry about removing it.
Who actually *uses* these though, besides twits hunting for warez/pr0n and people who are there to talk about anything but the on-topic stuff?
Has anyone been on MSN or AOL lately? The chatrooms there have failed. They attract idiots like iron filings to a magnet. Who's to say that this newer venture isn't doomed to live out the same fate?
And what kind of moron allows this profiling software to be installed/enabled in the first place? Yeah yeah, I know it involves ignoring EULAs and assuming far too much . . . but if they're that stupid to begin with, it is only fair that we let them have whatever's coming.
Wow I remember when Slashdot had cool nerds on it. Now It seems to be filled with nothing but Dale Gribble wannabes.
Holded up in their basements, bragging about how they cannot be tracked. How all of their packets cannot be tracked. While ironically their ISP logs every single request they make from behind there triple redundant firewalls. How when they go to Radio Shack they give a fake name.
This Bandlink thing is a non issue. But how about this. This is not some roving monster that sniffs out ever packet sent out by your CD player... (Since CD players can't send packets that would seem obvious)
This is not a Carnivore reaping all of the public's email.
If you want to install it do it. If not don't. But if you do it's nothing more threatening than a marketing survey. Since it only tracks what happens with Bandlink CDs and in the Bandlink Player, there are tons of ways to remain "hidden" from this "terror".
I find it sad really that so many people are trying to avoid marketers but feel free to place ads for "the best" firewall solution. I wonder how many of those posts come from zone alarm reps.
Anyway the site is really clear about how the software works, but if you don't wanna use it they tell you how to use your own player.
I've seen bigger issues such as, well, I don't know
AOL patents instant messaging
Where were all of the slashdot watchdogs on this one??? I guess to catch something this HUGE you would have to do some research and not just fire off a flaming post.
Get over yourselves. Get back to the big stuff. More posts about nextgen tech.
thanks.
(At least free cards like the Safeway[tm] Club Card.)
Mine says Emanual Goldstein.
Winston Smith might be more appropriate. I'm not sure.
Act like nothing's wrong.
(Of course now that I've posted this on the internet they can find out who I really am. I'm sure I'm the only one in the whole world to ever think of this.)
This signature used to contain a cute kitty virus with ansii art. Please set the slashdot editors on fire. Thank you
/* /usr/src/linux/net/inet/tcp.c, concerning RTT [round trip time]
* [...] Note that 120 sec is defined in the protocol as the maximum
* possible RTT. I guess we'll have to use something other than TCP
* to talk to the University of Mars.
* PAWS allows us longer timeouts and large windows, so once implemented
* ftp to mars will work nicely.
*/
-- from
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