Slashdot Mirror
Apple Patented by Microsoft
An anonymous reader writes "C|net is reporting that Microsoft received a patent on Tuesday for a new variety of apple tree. U.S. Plant Patent 14,757, granted to Robert Burchinal of East Wenatchee, Wash., and assigned to Microsoft, covers a new type of tree discovered in the early 1990s in the Wenatchee area, a major commercial apple-growing region. Dubbed the 'Burchinal Red Delicious,' the tree is notable for producing fruit that achieves a deep red color significantly earlier than other varieties. It is sold commercially as the 'Adams Apple.'" Apparently, the assignation of the patent to Microsoft was an error. Or so they would have us believe ...
MS Air, the most breatheable air you can find arround. Decreased cost on large volume orders of our EULAir licences.
...this is a joke, right? Seriously, if the patent office is given out patents for naturally growing TREES, something is wrong.
Speaking of plant patents: Which patented plant are they smoking at the patent office.
Remember Apple Records' suing Apple Computer for selling music-related products? I bet they REALLY won't like this!
Props to GNAA!
OK, I give up. I see where this is going. Let's skip to the end move now: "Hey, M$, Take my DNA and patent it and put me out of my misery now."
Truth is stranger than fiction.
Good for him/her, if you spend all your time scowling at Microsoft your face will freeze that way. Ya gotta smile from time to time. :)
Just in, Microsoft has now patented it's users ! The Copyright Department of the US Gov. issued this copyright after it's head offical recieved an "anonymus" gift of 25,000,000,000. Microsoft claims patenet on it's users due to the fact it has integrated idiots across the nation into it's system, and they can't fuction without it :P
Slashdot: News for botanists. Stuff that makes you wonder what plant-derived illegal substances the editors are abusing.
*runs out to patent fungus on his toes*
Sun patents the Moon, news at 11...
Unfortunately, in order to eat this apple you're going to have to have two mouths, 350 teeth, and the stomach the size of a small child.
The Human Cow - bringing you scrumtrelescence since 1995
Bobby Burchinal apparently has forgotten that I discovered his genetic code and have patented him so I assume ownership of any of his patents (whether they're of other life or not).
Interesting that you can patent a tree you 'discovered', and did not create. Perhaps I'll patent air.
Hey, if this is a good enough stunt for Lindows to pull on Microsoft... why can't Microsoft do it too?
(But this time do it right by getting patents)
Maybe Apple can retaliate by getting a patent on a particular type of four-paned window.....
READY.
PRINT ""+-0
...this goes under the 'Apple' slashdot section?!?
A Microsoft spokesman refused to comment on the substance of the error, but alluded to a secret project named "Money Tree". When corrected that money does not in fact grow on trees, but rather on bushes and shrubs, the Microsoft spokesman paused in contemplation, then ran quickly to his car shouting "Eureka!". Microsoft stock finished up 1/4 to land at 26.30.
Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress at this period in history.
Betcha that Microsoft apple gets attacked by a lot of worms called Sasser. Blue Seeds of Death?
Props to GNAA!
A Microsoft representative confirmed that the assigning of the patent to the company was a mistake..
The article does go on to discuss the huge inventory of legitimate tech patents that Microsoft has and how they plan to license more of same.
But the software giant has been a prolific patent generator in other areas. The company embarked on a campaign late last year to generate more revenue from its patent portfolio, offering to license widely used inventions such as its ClearType font technology and FAT storage format.
I think that the writer thought "Microsoft patenting Apple" was a humorous intro to Microsofts rather deep pile of patents.
Happy Trails!
Erick
http://www.busyweather.com/
"Apple patented by Microsoft."
"sold commercially as the 'Adams Apple'"
We need some more, like...
"Just some more worms for Microsoft"
"Do they have plans for authentication?"
"Microsoft shows the softer side of a monopoly"
...and so on...
webpage
I knew the patent office was slow, but dang. April Fools day was over a month ago...
Apparently the apple has been mistakenly assigned to Microsoft.
This is clearly a Microsoft plot to install their propreitary software on produce world wide.
Apple (AAPL) registered a patent for a new device designed to transmit radient energy from the sun from outside houses to the interior of the house, using 4 glass pieces affixed in a wooden frame. Apple calls their new development a "Window". Apple stock finished up 1/2 to wind up at 26.65
Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under considerable economic stress at this period in history.
Kinda funny, but it highlights the stupidity of our patent system. I wonder if I should patent the mold in my shower as a lethal weapon. Perhaps I'll name it SporediferousBillGatesium.
Kind thoughts do not change the world
What kind of (tree based) data structure is this? How would one go about making it AVL? ...and I thought B-Tree was bad.
$cat
Steve Jobs must be very, very, relieved.
Free Software: Like love, it grows best when given away.
Why should Microsoft have to file a certificate of correction? The process is wrong - What if Microsoft decided 'Hey, we are going to keep the patent. You just try to take it back'. It is the patent office's mistake.
<tinfoilhat place="on">What if the copies of Microsoft Office that were sold to the Patent Office were given a hidden feature of inserting Microsoft into patents that matched specific keywords?</tinfoilhat>
--jeff++
ipv6 is my vpn
Hmmm....Adam's apple, the apple taken from the tree of wisdom. Joy. Just remember, God hath commanded that all ye who tasteth of the forbidden fruit be condemned to hell. Say hi to Billy when you get there.
Said an unnamed representative from the USPTO, "Oops, sorry, that one was supposed to go to Monsanto. Honestly, keeping track of evil amoral corporations these days is a real Pain-in-the-Ass(R)."
Schwab
Editor, A1-AAA AmeriCaptions
I believe this could be a mistake.
But will it be a mistake when Microsoft patents all our other favorite foods.
"Triple Fudge Cake, By McCain in partnership with Microsoft Foods Inc."
With the moo and the cow and the fish. Minesweeper Record: 7 sec
The fact that anyone could patent an apple just goes to show you that the patent system needs to be redone. How this was even passed on to anyone, given prior 'art' is beyond me.
Even though Microsoft supposedly didn't get the patent; I wonder if the true patent holder will now sue all apple farmers, saying it infringes on their patent.
did I think I'd see my home town on Slashdot.
First SCO says it owns Linux, then Microsoft says it owns Apple... oh the horror!
it's just a linked list, some people will patent anything.
thank God the internet isn't a human right.
Does this mean I should expect the blue sky of death?
This is exactly why we should take a serious look at whether the United States should have a patent office at all.) required something governmental to effectively reward the researcher.
The original concept of the patent system was fine in an era or rural agriculture and home shops. The economics of Perfect Competition (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfect_competition
Today that is quite different.
The small, lone inventor is now a myth because 1) research on technical things (Software Patents aside, those are just bad period.) is done now by large universities and businesses who only can license other technologies and pay the research. 2) the patent application system is prohibitively expensive for any small player. Furthermore, so many applications are filed a year, the office spends about 17 hours an application. 17 hours is not enough to have a generally education person (not even necessarily someone in the field) to take a serious look at the invention. The only way one can compete with a patent is through cross-licensing one technology for another which allows the companies in competition to produce the same product. That makes the patent system moot to all but those entering the market, who get screwed.
The argument goes on, but for the sake of briefness I'll cut it off there at a gross generalization.
Why, for the sake of God's Green Earth, can anybody claim a patent on something that has grown in the ground, DISCOVERED (not invented), and not researched. I don't care, quite frankly, who discovered it, I want to know if there was any human invention in its creation. If there isn't, the patent system has failed on a fundamental level because it's. Not. An. Invention.
Are there any nations with sane copyright, patent, and other laws?
The kind of apple one discovers (and the kind Microsoft should patent) is a hineapple.
It'll be Burchinal Red Delicious version 3.1 before you'd want to bake a pie with one.
Rumors are going wild about Microsoft thinking seriously to throw the towel and rename it's invention Aspire.
Achille Talon
Hop!
And to think how worried I was when I first read the title
Too bad their isn't a microsoft tree that Apple accidentally be given a patent on:-)
Why in the world is this frontpage news?
imagine a beowulf cluster of these!
I would like to contest that it was I and I alone who invented the apple tree and as such I will be suing.
-God
Esoteric reference.
Patent deep red colored Apples and sue Job's & company out of existence! =-o If only there was some prior art!
Heh...
Cwm, fjord-bank glyphs vext quiz
Do you get a patent on flora by finding it growing in a field?
:wq
But subscribers can read it early.
...and ye shall receive. Two mouths (sorry Ebaum).
What I want to know why a patent was granted for something that was discovered? I thought patents were for invented stuff...
If I recall correctly, around 1998 or 1999 Washington apple growers were going bankrupt and ended up buldozing their orchards while refusing government bailouts. The problem didn't come from having bad trees or blights or whatever. The problem came from years of misguided selective breeding. Apple farmers were so caught up on making perfect looking red delicious apples that had that beautiful waxy red look on its own. The only problem with these apples was that they were completely flavorless and resulted in low sales. Bet this discovery is just result of this bad breeding. Maybe this is the future for M$. Wishful thinking anyway...
...but then I got hungry.
Am I the only one who finds prominent adam's apples (the one on your throat) unsettling? As a name for a food, it strikes me as utterly unappealing. Even more unappealing than Red Delicious apples normally are.
What I'm listening to now on Pandora...
Try selling that one on eBay. Whoops! I guess you can't.
Oh...you mean like a fruit apple...
With 800,000,000 patents day they just assume it's for MS and then sort it out after, it actually saves money that way.
Here is Microsoft's apple pricing:
Apples XP are $3/lb
Costumers who have previously purchased Apples 95 or Apples 98 can get Apples XP for $2.50/lb. A valid license, um, I mean receipt, is needed
Apples Longhorn will likely be available sometime in 2008. They will likely be very tasty, but they will also have very high digestive system requirements.
Asuming these apples are good and delicious, I guess Microsoft can now say "So get a mac, We invented what make apples good"
As if it must be some marketing ploy.
Your comment could not be validated, a closing sarcasam tag was detected without a matching opening tag or valid doctype please edit your document and try again.
Variety of cannibus sativa that is favored by Jamaicans with purple hairs; often used to lower blood pressure ("loosen up") causing loss of concentration and apathy ("high"), often incapacitating said Jamaicans. ...
Profit!!!
Apparently, the assignation of the patent to Microsoft was an error.
So there's a twist to the tryst?
Perhaps you meant assignment.
I RTFMed, but I haven't a clue what assignation is being discussed. But it would be like the folks at Redmond to deny it. Hell, even Clinton denied his assignation.
I think it's just Microsofts way of saying "Apple, we 0wn j00"
Microsoft also denied financing the snake, but after mankind multiplied, asserted its orginal IPee on the apple to own all of them. (Ok, mixed metophors.)
h _prote cting_bodily_waste/
Just for fun:
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2004/03/09/bof
(remove any spaces in the URL)
It would be an Orchard and can you imagine how expensive it would be to handle the worms and still get productivity?
to eat it, you must press the stem and pick "peel"
if you hit a worm, the apple mumbles "exception error"
...drumroll... If you press control-cloverleaf, the Microsoft Apple turns into a MACINTOSH!
Stay tuned.
Web2.0: I love when people Flickr my cuil and digg my boingboing until my google is reddit and I start to yahoo
All of it has either been eaten or rotten
we should have patented atoms or quarks when they were firsn discovered. Talk about monopoly!
Don't waste your vote! Vote for whoever you want, unless you live in a swing state it won't matter anyways
Its being a little pudgy around the midsection...
Royalties from farmers growing these Burchinal Red Delicious are going to pay Bill's electric bill every month.
These aren't edible...they will be consumed by fast spreading worms within days anyway. Stick to Granny Smiths.
"We at microsoft believe us as the tree, and our programs, the apples, are adequately described as falling, or being picked[pirated] by 'h4x0r5.' Please note that, much like an apple, most microsoft items go bad within 10 minutes of being opened (or turn a nasty brown color)"
--------- let's go steal some lunchboxes!
Beware - I've heard that eating Microsoft apples leads to endless core dumps...
I think God has prior art on this one..
Before you get into bed with a company, first check to see if it has an Adam's apple. If so, choose an alternative.
yeah
What in hell is wrong with this site? Why in the world would this ever be posted as news? Is this site so blatently anti-Microsoft that when a stupid patent is accidently falsely attribtued to Microsoft it's worthy of a fucking news story? You don't honesty think stupid shit like this happens all the time? Oh no, some asshole in the patent office made a mistake, hurry, let's post a fucking story on Slashdot!
Mod me down all you want. This is totally fucking stupid. No wonder Slashdot is quickly becoming a fucking laughing stock. What a waste of time. You people and your anti-Microsoft, anti-Goverment, left wing bull shit! What a fucking crock. Who exactly do you think owns Slashdot anyway, huh? You're just as beholden to corporations as people who buy Windows. You fucking dolts just don't realize it. Take a quick look into who owns and funds this site if you think your shit doesn't stink. Trust me, if they ever found themselves in the position Microsoft was in, they would do exactly what Microsoft has done.
You fucking sheep make me laugh out loud. Say what you will about me, at least I know who and what I support. You fucking idoits are working for the man just like I am, the differnce being I know what I'm doing and you idoits think your on some crusade against "the man". Well I've got news for you tools, we both serve the same master. The differnce being I have no delusions about what I'm doing and you peope think your movement is the second coming. You delude yourselves.
From the PTO website
Minor nitpick, plant patents are for 20 years accoriding to the site -truth
I had a steady B+ in my AI class until I failed the Turing test...
It means your going to be spending a lot of money from now on just to use Windows. But that was already the case
...Steve Ballmer or Larry Ellison?
Re:It isn't even april...: :)
I thought that it is worth noting that patenting things you create is entirely legal and even profitable. Hybrids such as those apple tree can sold earlier in the season! Which means healthier snacks for people in the spring time
Happy Cinco de Mayo!
A good link for debunking the ever present "Patents can only be afforded by huge megacorps" is the fee schedule. (link will change next time they update it)
Slashdot is why I got interested in the law. Interest in the law is why I'll leave slashdot.
-truth
I had a steady B+ in my AI class until I failed the Turing test...
eom
Oh Come on, at least I didnt say "Imagine a beowolf cluster of these"
This sig intentionally left blank
Would have a few grand and a lawyer handy to make a joke.
Trees v2.0
by Joyce Kilmer
I think that I shall never see
A poem as lovely as a patented tree.
A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the earth's sweet flowing breast;
A tree that looks to God all day,
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;
A tree that may in summer wear
A nest of Adams Apples [TM] in her hair;
Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.
Poems are made by fools like me,
But only inventors can make a tree.
Yet another deceiving slashdot headline.
ok, fine, make a headline that catches my attention, i even had NO problem with it being "apple patented by microsoft", but the fact is that it is in the "Apple" section, which is just... plain... deceptive.
This has nothing to do with the apple section, but an apple trre, unrelated to technology, and is not even "news for nerds"... I dont want to hear about an apple tree, and we all know that microsoft patents everything, we going to put all of those as headlines too?
At best, this is Microsoft news, not Apple.
This type of apple is apparently very susceptible to worms.
Microsoft released a patch, which basically involves cutting out the core and replacing it with a Macintosh core.
So this is a patent filling, right from the USPTO - it isn't mine, e-mailed the law firm, no response. I am assuming sometime before it issues, but who knows. I would rather believe that the government screwed up rather than Microsoft is busy buying up patents on apple trees
I have mod points and I am not afraid to use them
but I understand he's got a senior partner in Killin Burnhamm and Hech on retainer in perpetuity.
Before you get into bed with a company, first check to see if it has an Adam's apple. If so, choose an alternative.
Which would have been perfect advice for those who invested in the Twenty-First Century Motor Car Corporation, a novel, if not notorious, 1970s stock fraud featuring a "female" CEO/con. "Her" LA company showed radical prototypes of an economical 3-wheeled car, just as Detroit was reeling from the first oil crisis. The charming CEO sold lots of stock and "dealerships" before the scam was uncovered and "she" left town, leaving behind -- as the press delicately reported it -- "a trail of protheses and wigs"!
Perhaps you should look into patenting this Adam's Apple Test of yours!
i think someone with a sense of humor at the patent office is responsible for this one.
You tried your best, & you failed miserably,
The lesson is:
Never Try
Microsoft still doesn't know how to make a produce not susceptible to worms... *sigh*
Does that mean that if I spread my 'seed' I get to patent any babies/foetuses as a result? (ducks)Of course, since I am a slashdotter, I doubt I'd get to spread my seed in the appropriate bushes...(ducks again!)
My Favourite Meme
Life forms should NEVER be patented.
This includes whole species, DNA strands, theoretical life forms, THE LOT.
Companies have NO RIGHT to be patenting life itself, which should be held sacred above all else, for philosophical, ecological and societal reasons.
THAT MEANS YOU, MONSANTO!
Some of us aren't as nerdy as we'd like to be.
I like how this was posted in the apple section. The editors must be so busy they don't even have time to read more than the title.
Can't resist urge....
I'm going to patent your ass!
...when you buy MS apples and MS air you get a free MS toaster*
*Please note MS toaster can only be used with MS butter and MS bread
"WebTV: bringing the Internet into the shallow end of the gene pool since 1995" - Martin Bishop
How about:
Dark Helmet: (low tone) The way Microsoft manages things it won't last six months.
-JemBut such shortsightedness soon comes home to roost, and now the Washington red delicious is a much maligned fruit, with more flavorful varieties on the ascendency. So did Microsoft really get anything worthwhile with this patent? Hardly. The new sub-variety's main claim to fame is that it turns red sooner. Big deal! That merely reinforces already-discredited thinking.
...between a rotten apple and Windows XP?
One's probably infested with worms,
and the other one's a rotten apple.
"Would you like to eat this apple? Yes/No"
....
"To complete digestion, your intestines must be restarted. Click Yes to restart now, or No if you intend to empty your intestines manually."
"Are you sure you wish to move apple core to the recycle bin?"
one for linux:
"core dumped"
*groan*
What's the frequency, Kenneth?
For SCO to come up with a patent on life.
Then finally we could all be forced to pay for the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to live. Can you imagine the termination clauses?
Imagine my surprise tonight...I take my girlfriend to dinner @ Applebees in Wenatchee, WA, go back to her place in East Wenatchee, WA, spend some good quality time with her and come home, fire up /. and lo and behold my hometown is in the news....heh heh heh....it's a small world after all ;)
If you can Patent an apple tree could i breed a new variaty of cattle and patent the livestock?
Saying Apple is better than MS is like saying Botulism is better than rabies.
Genesis 3
1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:
3 But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.
4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.
...fuck can you patent something which you just happened to notice was growing in your backyard?
I've just applied for a patent on toenails, so all of you had better get your cash ready.
To be honest, I wasn't really surprised. If you've read /. in the past, you've seen how many idiotic and stupendous patents are issued by the american patent office. I really wonder if noone bothers to check these things, like (not relevant to this case) prior art, validity of a patent, ...
OK, they have a lot of work. True. But still, if the USA values its patent office so much as they say they do, maybe they should invest a bit more in more personnell that actually knows what they're doing and less in pulling muscle all around the globe.
I wouldn't be amazed if they actually manage to patent air, or water, someday to someone.
STEVE: What happen?
MECHANIC: Somebody set up us the patent.
OPERATOR: We get signal.
STEVE: What!
OPERATOR: Main screen turn on.
STEVE: It's you!!
BILL: How are you gentlemen?
BILL: All your patent are belong to us.
BILL: You are on your way to destruction.
STEVE: What you say!!
BILL: You have no chance to survive make your time.
BILL: HA HA HA HA...
* * *
It is a dada story -- it has no moral.
Imagine the product: Microsoft Apple 2004
Looks shiny, everyone's eating them, so you take a bite then notice it's full of worms and you have a pain for the next few hours.
... does that apple contain Palladium?
The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
You cant patent it, its a fucking TREE!!!
Mad Americans!
Wake the fuck up!!!
I'm beginning to like the feller's down at USPTO. They're having a ball.
"Oh let them fuckers handle it later. We'll be long dead by then."
In The Godfather, when you want to send a message, you drop a severed horse-head in your target's bed.
In the modern software world, you file an otherwise useless botanical patent that bears a strong iconic resemblance to your competitor. It's a corporate-geek threat.
Yeah, but you can patent particular genes by patenting the nucleic acid strings used to find/identify them. So it may not be possible to patent a dodo bird, but you can patent "the act of looking at a dodo bird" apparently, at least on the genetic level.
___
It's the end of my comment as I know it and I feel fine.
Everyone knows the M$ is now seeking to using genetically manufacturing to "grow" the code base for the next generate OS!
In the past, the existance of a thing prior to the patent seeker's discovery invalidates the patent. You can't patent somthing if there is prior art, i.e. "if it's been done before". If you find somthing occuring naturally in nature, it's been 'done before.' The purpose of a patent is to move information related to such things as fabrications or industrial processes into the public domain. As someone else mentioned 'there are no transistors in nature', and scientific laws cannot be patented just because they're discovered. You have to apply them for a particular application in a new way.
___
It's the end of my comment as I know it and I feel fine.
1. Patent a strain of Marijuana plants. 2. Follow news on growhouse takedowns. 3. Sue the operators in civil court for patent infringement. 4. Profit!
Do not look into the laser with remaining eye.
Red Delicious apples are like grocery store tomatoes, bred to look pretty but having neither the taste nor the consistency of the real fruit.
"Who controls the past controls the future. Who controls the present controls the past." -- George Orwell
I'm glad I got out of there when I did! Next thing you know, MS will start buying up land to create MS Apple orchards. I guess this is their way of branching into control of the food supply as well as the software supply.
Eat, Drink, Be Merry. Join the
I don't think that word means what you think it means.
Who cares if Microsoft patented it? The fact is, who-ever allowed there to ever be patents on trees is totally fucked in the head! Now looking at most politicians i dont know if they were just very old and should have retired, ill, insane, corrupt or totally fucked out of their mind on acid. At what level of sanity can you justify patenting a tree? Please someone enlighten me?
This comment does not represent the views or opinions of the user.
when will the slash dot kiddies grow up and drop this vendetta???
is it the slashdot manifesto to create things to bash MS over????
I just checked the patent... and it's a patent on a circular saw. CIRCULAR SAW!"
I hate grammar Nazi's.
How on earth do you assign a patent to the wrong party?
And how often has this occurred in the past i wonder?
---- Booth was a patriot ----
Print it on the apple, ' by biting thru this, you agree ... '
---- Booth was a patriot ----
Patent Hijacking
Sounds great, but where can I get a driver? Or does XP have an abstraction for it already?
Here in Australia you don't patent plant varieties, you obtain Plant Breeders Rights (PBR) basically it's the same thing. It protects the horticulturalist who came up with the plant from others breeding the plant without permission and without paying royalties.
I read a comment here that you shouldn't be able to do this to plants that were not interbred - plants that grew in nature. What would you say about what happened in our (my family runs a production nursery) place - my late grandfather discovered a mutant plant that had an advantage over what was currently being grown. It was the only one in the lot. Should we have not been able to get PBR on that?
What happened with that plant occurs often in nature, however it rarely gets a chance to be propagated. The plants are all grafted, and it just so happened that this one was a sport (a mutated bud). In the wild, plants do not get grafted. Humans graft trees because it allows us to maintain consistency and grow a plant with certain characteristics as the choice of rootstock has a bearing on how the plant grows and what conditions it can grow in. If you take two plants and cross-pollinate them, the plants that grow from the resulting seeds will all be genetically different - just like humans having babies.
But back to the PBR debate. As you may guess, it takes many years to develop or discover new varieties of plants - it is a very labour intensive and drawn-out process inherent with risks. Should a plant breeder not be afforded protection from unscrupulous operators moving in on his new variety and flooding the market to make a quick buck?
For those that are interested, that mutant plant that my grandfather found was a Kaffir Lime. When we brought the Kaffir to Australia we could only obtain a very limited amount of budwood. We were under an agreement that we could not sell them for a few years whilst we ramped up production (using budwood from the previous years' lot for the next years lot.) because they were a tree that was in such demand that other nurserys would have bought the trees and propagated them, which would have denied the originator their royalties. The variety we grew was the best one to use for cooking - it had an extremely high concentration of volatile oils in the leaves - only problem was that it had big bastard thorns and the damn trees would scratch your arms to shreds (even through a jumper) when handling them. The mutant we found was the same, except it had no thorns! After keeping that tree under lock and key and giving it lots of TLC we took budwood and propagated it, repeating the process over a few years until we had enough to replace the volume of the original variety. The other main variety of Kaffir Lime sold in Australia is a fast-growing variety with large, light leaves and no thorns - only problem is that there's no flavour in the leaves. Go into an Asian grocery store and look at the Kaffir Lime leaves - they're all like the sort that we grow.
Oh Come on, at least I didnt say "Imagine a beowolf cluster of these"
Perhaps you mean out loud? And don't think of Blue Elephants either.. crap.
Too bad there wasn't something called "microsoft" like in William Gibson's Neuromancer that Apple could invent and patent. Then we could have the equally disconcerting headline as this article!
While this apple is simple to eat it is worth noting that it is extremely susceptible to worms and viruses.
Perhaps Microsoft is trying to protect itself against Linux. If the windooze goes down, they will be happily running a gardening business :) Always have something to fall back upon. Though Farmer Billy sounds a little sily :) An apple could easily be used to break windows :)
"Discovered?" Shouldn't you, like, have to *invent* something in order to get a patent? You know, do some work to call it into existence? It may be legal but it seems wrong.
I'm a bit worried to hear that Microsoft is having assignations with patents. That is just too kinky for words.
1. Microsoft founded
:)
2. Almost monopoly on desktop computers
3. ????
4. PROFIT!!!
Now I definitely now where the 3 stands for!
'Patent Apple'
sig(h)
... Steven Jobs just patented the appearance of his male muscle.
The purpose of the thorns, of course, are the apple tree's DRM, invented to prevent the neighbor's kids from pirating its apples...
Do I have to be the expert on EVERYTHING?
Okay, here we go. There are two important facts about apple genetics. The first is, apple trees do not 'breed true' to their subspecies. That is to say, take an apple seed from a green granny smith apple tree. Pollenate it with pollen from another green granny smith apple tree. Plant it, water it, take care of it (for several years) until it matures enough to bear fruit. What are the chances that it produces green granny smith apples?
Answer: roughly the same chances that you have of winning the lottery with one ticket. I don't remember the exact number but it is in the range of one in a million or worse.
What are the chances that the apples are any more edible than your average crab-apple tree's apples? I don't remember this number either, but I believe it was between one in a thousand and one in ten thousand. Which, incidentally, are pretty much the same odds as you have for any of the seeds from the crab apple tree in your back yard producing a tree that yields desirable fruit.
So where do all these green granny smiths actually come from? They're basically clones (grown from cuttings) of the One Original Green Granny Smith tree.
So how does a person make new apple variants? Simple... he plants a WHOLE LOT of seeds, grows them to fruit-bearing, and checks each one to see if the apples taste good. If he gets something really good, then he stands to make a boodle. If he's not very lucky, every single one of the trees produces crab apples or otherwise inedible variants and he ends up with several acres of cordwood. And he tries again.
Now, to say that patents aren't the way to reward someone that plants ten thousand apple trees is a perfectly valid argument. But it's hard to protect your intellectual property with just a contract... if you license someone to grow the 'big boy' apple, which you invented, and he sells it to seventy people, thus breaking his contract, you can sue him, but the seventy people not only can grow the apples legally but can resell the cuttings and you can't do anything about it. Unless, of course, you have a patent.
Basically, it requires a lot of work, a lot of money, and a lot of luck to make a new apple variety, and without a patent it is hard to protect it when you're done. It differs from other patentable endeavors not a lot in this way.
-fred
Sign #11 of Slashdot overdose: You see the phrase 'moderate Republican' and you wonder if that would be a +1 or a -1.
Fark had this at least a day before you guys :)
This is the only post all day that I laughed out loud after reading it. My account is still to new to have Mod points.
This is a fair warning. I have just received a patent for "small pointy things growing off the end of an arm". I have decided to call them fingers. The "fingers" were discovered in 1987 at a grateful dead concert. Granted they seemed a lot more significant that night, but that does not matter...
In short, I now have the patent on these and if you are using them without my permission then you are in violation. My legal advisors Mr. Riaa and Mr. Sco have advised me that anyone sending typed correspondance must be using "fingers" and can be named on a mass supeana and sued.
(that counts for mod'ng me down also)
It ain't just Monsanto. Seminis Vegetable Seeds does R&D for Monsanto and other biotech firms. As much as we may really, really think it's wrong to patent life, the fact is money talks and Monsanto has plenty. Want to do something about it? Tough, if you live in the US: GE firms have a lobby almost as large as the pharmaceutical industry and any letter-writing campaign will be hopelessly adrift in the sea of cash surrounding this issue. The US administration and congress listen to campaign contributions, not to "luddite tree-huggers".
As far as backbone, I have to give the EU credit. They stood up to blackmail by the US's bitching to the WTO about their ban on GM foods, and even though the WTO did levy sanctions, the EU gave both the US and the WTO the finger. Still, Seminis maintains GM R&D plants in Holland, France and Italy. Though they can't sell GM stuff there, there's nothing says they can't develop it.
One other small note regarding Terminator Technology (C): Monsanto has said they're not using it, but they're testing it in Roundup Ready crops. Problem is these tests go unmonitored by the FDA, although GM watchdogs have shown that plants using TT genes can infect other plants downwind during pollen season, at worst rendering those plants' offspring sterile, or at least infecting them with copyrighted genetic sequences. Sounds like someone's trying to monopolize human food sources, or does that have a 'conspiracy theorist' ring to it? I guess we'll just have to take their word that they're not using TT genes...
I can't say I'm surprised to see Micro$oft, with their army of rabid patent lawyers hop on the Genetic Engineering train. Who knows what's next?
GOD BLESS AMERICA! Land of the Free Market and home of the Brave Investor.
--Mekkis, self-admitted troll.
What happens when the Microsoft Apple gets a Virus, or worse, a worm??
Microsoft's recent pending patent's have just been leaked:
Water - because they thought up h2o first, damnit!
Air - legally sold to the masses in convenient aluminum cans (i.e. Spaceballs)
Those sticky plastic tabs on new CD's - because obviously, only a true bastard (like Microsoft) could think up shit like that!
Computers are useless. They can only give answers. --Pablo Picasso
Apple Files Patent for Translucent Windows