Slashdot Mirror
Death Star Subwoofer
bmfs writes "A subwoofer so powerful it could loosen fillings, shake out the cholesterol from arteries and generally make a lot of noise. It seems that the Death Star, ignoring the weakness that ultimately lead to its complete destruction, was a pretty good design... so someone made his own (with a lot of help from a housemate). The Death Star Subwoofer is currently up for sale on Ebay."
Let's see how you handle it...
Q: I am short, useless and provide no value. What am I? A: a sig
Just like George Lucas' legal team!
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
It's a subwoofer
I never spellcheck and I freely admit it. Save your karma for more worthwhile "lol erorrs" replies
looks more like a "deaf" star, yo.
*pauses to pour out a 40 for my fallen homies who have joined the force*
Are the construction photos of the Death Star Subwoofer. He won't ship it due to size and weight so you need to be local to Reading, UK to pick it up. These photos betray enough of the design to build your own fully armed and operational battle station.
Urge to post... fading... fading... RISING!... fading... fading... gone.
"Now witness the FULL POWER
of this fully armed and operational BASS STATION"
Fear will keep the other speakers in line!
-darth voice begins- Now you will feel the power of the Dark Side! -darth voice ends-
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. - Martin Luther King, Jr.
This isn't the bass you are looking for...
I'll turn into a supernova and burn up everything. Well I'll turn into a black little hole and you'll turn into string.
Wish I could get my auctions posted on slashdot...
Can it run Linux?
from the eBay listing:
"a subwoofer so powerful it could loosen fillings, shake out the colesteral from my arteries and generally make a lot of noise. It seemed to me that the Death Star, ignoring the weakness that ultimately lead to it's complete destruction, was a pretty good design... so I made my own (with a lot of help from my then housemate)."
from the post:
"A subwoofer so powerful it could loosen fillings, shake out the cholesterol from arteries and generally make a lot of noise. It seems that the Death Star, ignoring the weakness that ultimately lead to its complete destruction, was a pretty good design... so someone made his own (with a lot of help from a housemate). The Death Star Subwoofer is currently up for sale on Ebay."
Hmmm...the copy and paste is strong in this one. At least he fixed a couple spelling/grammar errors.
Who's going to build the Bass-tille?
Striking fear in the authors of godawful fanfiction, I am here, appearing in darkness, Tuxedo Jack!
The Q&A section alone is worth reading TFA.
Q: Look at the size of that thing!
A: Cut the chatter Red 2.
. . . Nobody can hear you . . .
Pretty Pictures!
All they need now is one I can attach my car stereo to so people can hear me coming from 30 miles away.
Voice your opinion!
I think Jar Jar Weasley dies when the Dark Lord Vadermort blows up Hogobah... oh never mind.
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
The subwoofer installed is an Alpine 12" SWS-1242D, rated at 900W peak power, 300W rms. The enclosure is filled with foam wadding and ported. The ports are vented directly out the bottom of the subwoofer. The design was modelled on WinISD to calculate the port lengths... it's proper stuff :) There are two 4mm binding posts at the back for connection to a power amplifier. I'll be adding the amplifier to e-bay as soon as I type out a description, but any amplifier will work.
These suckers have put in yet another thermal exhaust port that would be the prefect fit for a couple of proton torpedoes. Idiots never learn from history. The Bose alliance is going to have a field day with this.
Compared to my ghetto computer (in full Soul Train mode), my ghetto computer can bset your whimpy death star.
you just quoted the subtitle on the ebay ad.
Look sir... Floyds.
Reportedly, the force was with it.
-Rob
Biblical fiscal responsibility
Who dies in the new Harry Potter?
Whathisname, the token black kid.
A subwoofer so powerful it could loosen fillings, shake out the cholesterol from arteries and generally make a lot of noise.
Just like many of the chavs who drive past my office every day.
I'm about 250 yards from the road, and mini-roundabout they have to stop at. There are doubled glazed windows, and insulated timber walls between too.
Some of these chavs have bass so loud and powerful, it physically hurts even when sat at my desk, or is low enough to give people headaches, or pop ear drums like when leaving a tunnel.
Deathstar has nothing on these people, if you can call them people anymore... Zombies probably covers it better, what with their pickled brains and all.
"I find your lack of bass disturbing."
Who do you pay to get your ebay auctions posted on slashdot!?!? He'll be having a very nice christmas I'll bet...
1, 2, 3, 4, 5... That's the combination on my luggage!
So, this would be "stuff that matters", right? :)
1. Make silly Star Wars / Star Trek gadget.
2. Put it up on eBay
3. Notify Slashdot
4. Profit!
He should have thought about it more. Even if the shipping was a hundred or so, I'm sure he could have found people that would be willing to pay much more for it even with shipping since some Star Wars fans can be rather rabid and obsessive... *cough* Time to return to my homemade Star Trek bridge.....
In undeveloped countries, the consumer controls the market. In capitalist America, the market controls you.
... it will still be insignificant when compared to the power of the Force.
Bryan R.
The price of freedom is eternal vigilance, or $12.50 as seen on eBay.....
All your BASS are belong to us!
Why yes, I *AM* new here. Why?
But still powerfully weak. While I'm sure the bass output from it is strong, that thing just doesn't have the sheer wattage or box design, or even a speaker worth a damn. Its minimally interesting only because the guy made a purty looking box, but for real home theatre you are better off with something ported and tuned for low frequencies (however low you consider "low").
And a better speaker would probably be good too.
I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly drowned out by the noise.
--Mike Boos
I think this guy is going to get a lot of money for this thing because of some huge Star Wars fan out there... It will be interesting to check back later today to see where the bid is at.
to bring us this link...
You mean Boromir, right? The guy killed by the Cylons because he entered a stargate during a Wraith attack.
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
I happened to check out the listing when there were only 3 comments posted on Slashdot about this. The ebay counter was around 4000 at the time and now it's up to 11000+ about 5 minutes later! Behold, the power of Slashdot!
THIS is a subwoofer.
TODO: Something witty here...
...and together we can rule the home cinema, as subwoofer and centre speaker. Together we have the power to play the sound effects of Jurassic Park^H^H^H^H^H^H^HReturn of the Sith as they were destined to be...
DV: I am your Father. LS: Pardon? DV: Doesn't matter.
Just let us know when you build your Imperial Car Destroyer. Put the plans up here (slashdotting be damned). I bet it would be a real babe magnet.
"Hey, baby! Anyone ever tell you look just like Natalie Portman? Come over here and check out my ride. It's got 385 Tauntauns under the hood. Maybe we can go over to my apartment. I've got hot grits and Death Star loudspeakers. Yeah, baby."
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
I was expecting some 18-inch, multi-kilowatt monster, but instead I find some low-end Alpine (!?) and a mere 300 watts. Oh, and a big enclosure made to look like the Death Star. Meh.
can it emit the brown note?
An Indian-American Hindu committed to non-violent thought/speech/action alarmed by the global explosion of radical Islam
...a bad feeling about this."
One ring to bind them - should probably have more fiber and less rings in their diet.
James Earl Jones has never sounded so... Verizon.
Let's watch the number of bids augment as the auction is being slashdotted. Free advertising anyone ?
\u262D = \u5350
First look at this hack reminded me of the Bowers & Wilkins PV1. IMHO, a much much better deathstar subwoofer.
Sigh. If only i could afford one of these babies.
I got a 19" TV I'm trying to get rid of! Maybe /. will help me net $20,000 for it?
I've got a Weber propane BBQ painted to look like Jabba's barge. If I put it on eBay, can you make it a Slashdot news item tomorrow?
Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
From TFA:
Quotes
"Jesus Christ, what's that!"... Colin
"I can feel my trousers vibrating"... Steve
"Turn your bass down"... My neighbours
"That won't fit in our apartment"... My Girlfriend
Time is comparison of movement to other movement.
In other news...The officials said all of the candidates on Bush's short list are male and female judges What an insensitive clod! No hermaphrodites on the list AGAIN!
I sell Jar Jar Binx piñata.
- shadowmatter
The weight for this thing is given in kilos, while its size is given in inches.... seems strange to this Yank.... shouldn't the measurements be given in cm's? Is this mixing of measurements common? Anyways, good excuse for using my unit conversion widget... whoa.... 65 kilos = 143.30047 lbs
all your vibes are belong to us
It'd be great if us firefox users could, you know, *see it*?
Glad i'm not actually thinking of buying it, since I can't see it.
C'mon Ebay.
-- Note: If you don't agree with me, don't bother replying. I won't read it.
Damn trolls.
Information wants to be free.
Entertainment wants to be paid.
You just want to be cheap.
Q: If I can't collect, can it fly through space to me instead?
A: That would require a pilot of considerable skill.
Yes, yes it would.
In another funny auction someone is selling the domain name for Brewster Jennings & Associates, which has been in the news a lot recently as it was the CIA front company that Valerie Plame supposedly worked for.
I aspire to reach your level of trolling greatness.
+1 for successfully baiting the mod.
+1 for delivery.
I doff my hat to you!
-TrollKin
From TFA: "That won't fit in our apartment"... My Girlfriend
Obviously, the power of this deathstar pales in comparison to the power of the Wife Acceptance Factor (OK girlfriend, same thing basically in this case) How about Wife Acceptance Force?
WAF -Bane of audiophiles, pretenders and geeks in general
"Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but not their own facts." ~The Honorable Daniel Patrick Moynihan
- /jealous - of seeing your overly proud audio-geek neighbor house collapse into rubble... - /jealous -
I really hope for him he cancelled the harmonic at which his house resonates 8)
Also, I really would have had a look at his jacuzzi 8)
It takes 40+ muscles to frown, but only four to extend your arm and bitchslap the motherfucker
Is it THX compliant?
...for using the official Slashvertisement system!
Linkie found at the bottom of the eBay listing... http://www.objectreality.co.uk/DeathStarPlans/
This should really get appended to the article text.
But I think you can find out if you read the book.
See, this is the first thing that women do when they get their hooks into you - make you get rid of something you put hundreds of hours and pounds into, just because "it won't fit into the apartment". It's not about that, it's about her controlling him with sex, just seeing how high she can make him jump.
Next she's slowly going to start getting rid of his bachelor friends, the better to control him. This is why any reasonable man should steer clear of "modern" women. Start your own business, invest well, buy and build cool stuff, and always keep women at arm's length - lest you become a pussywhipped fool who replaces his brilliantly engineered subwoofers, motorcycle, and sports car with window treatments, no sex, and a minivan.
Dumbass.
'Be always mindful, even when ditch-digging.' --D. T. Suzuki
The guy has his plans posted on how he built this thing.
Now is see why it weighs 65Kilos.
640YB ought to be enough for anybody.
How about a translation for us stupid Americans?
I find your lack of faith...disturbing.
> A subwoofer so powerful it could loosen fillings, shake out the cholesterol from arteries and generally make a lot of noise.
Not quite. It's only a 300Watt RMS 12 inch woofer. I have more power than that in my car and a similar one as part of my home theater. If it was an 15 or some sort of advanced tech I might start to get impressed. But this thing won't do much in the subsonic range.
It has been statistically shown that helmets increase the risk of head injury.
I'd bid if it could produce a sound that would make me shit my pants.
Your speakers are weak old man.
It's actually quite interesting to see how much time people have available to quarrel... These people didn't like metric - and faced the music.
who are jeering about having too much time on your hands... son, if _you_ lived in Reading, you too would end up constructing novelty furnishings and home equipment in the form of spacecraft from 1970s movies. Indeed, my 'Dark Star' security light is particularly effective at making burglars wonder how they can know they exist...
"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." -- Goethe
Slashdot:
Ads for Nerds - Stuff that's Shiny!
But with my luck, my neighbors will buy this overpowered and loud subwoofer.
If the subwoofer is this big, imagine how big the SPEAKERS are!!!
if (!sig) { printf("Signature Unavailable\n"); }
"All your bass are belong to us"
I like to listen to DJ Magic Mike with this thing! Not to mention video games would be so cool with this.
As badly as I'd like a girl friend at this point, I wouldn't want one who would make me give this thing up, especially if I'd been the one to build it. The man put a huge amount of effort into it's construction...
Of SW modding continues. Lucas, be warned.
Just say'n
Death Star Plans
Wow...that bad boy is robust!
Content Management System: A pretentious way of saying "text editor."
Of all the things that could be picked up from American culture, this has to be the worst.
Some would say the truck-driving redneck is worse than the ricer, but that's because they don't understand how vile these people really are.
So, from me to you, I deeply apologize for having not exterminated the infestations over here before it could spread to the rest of the world.
Worthless junk. Designed to be more than everyone else's lesser worthless junk. This sort of exagerated useless tech should be shunned not celebrated its a waste of resources.
This isn't a "death star subwoofer" any more than a traditional speaker box is an "empire state building" subwoofer.
It's a spherical enclosure, with some (very) minor additions. A reasonable facsimile of the Death Star? Not even close.
When will you star wars nerds stop falling all over yourselves about this stuff?
I think his name is Token.....
Do not be so proud of this technological terror you have constructed.
*** Where are we going? And what's with this handbasket?
This Death Star or a Cylon Bass Star?
Your seller wanted to have this when he was old enough, but is wife wouldn't allow it.
Here is the link he provided on the ebay listing of him building the speaker.
I heard that the death star subwoofer was created in an attempt to produce the dreaded brown noise frequency.
TODO: come up with a clever sig
"We'll give you two thousand now, plus fifteen, when it reaches [my house]."
Bidder's question to seller: "Why would you ever get rid of this? It's so cool, who cares what the wife says."
Seller's Answer: "She's rich... with more wealth than YOU could image!"
Don't be too proud of this technological terror you've constructed. The ability to pump up the bass is insignificant next to the power of the Force.
Oh, and watch out for Rebel scum seeking to blow it up.
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy notes that Disaster Area, a plutonium rock band from the Gagrakacka Mind Zones, are generally held to be not only the loudest rock band in the Galaxy, but in fact the loudest noise of any kind at all.
Regular concert goers judge that the best sound balance is usually to be heard from within large concrete bunkers some thirty-seven miles from the stage, while the musicians themselves play their instruments by remote control from within a heavily insulated spaceship which stays in orbit around the planet - or more frequently around a completely different planet.
Technoli
If someone were to make these in the US, I'm sure they could sell as many as they could make for $500 a pop.
I'd buy one for $150, but it's worth more than that just for the labor.
Star Wars, yet useful. Not something you see very often.
I just got some major 70's flashbacks looking at those pictures :)
Speaker Diameter: 12 inches
Weight: ~ 65Kilos.... I did say it was over engineered!"
wtf? Is the guy British or not? I mean, ebay.co.uk, but measuring in inches? I think my head is gonna explode...
No trespassing. Violators will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.
12 inch driver, big whoop. get'cha an EV 30W organ/reinforcement woofer someplace, 30 inch diameter and something like only 25 watts drive power, and build something that will crush that little clock-radio sub on eBay.
some notes. excellent article in a 1960s popular electronics on building it. you need a reflex or exponential horn cabinet, depending on how many mcf of room you want to rattle. cutoff frequency is 80 HZ, don't drive it any higher. you will need to use at least 1-1/4 plywood with stout internal bracing, screws, and glue to put the cabinet together, and 1-1/2 inch is better. "stout internal bracing" means clear hardwood 2x4 or larger.
this speaker was also used in the EV Patrician speaker system back in the day, as well as electric organs for churches and halls. they are very easily damaged in transit, and should be shipped in either the factory box or the original cabinet it was found it.
last ones I saw on eBay were $3500 each. they used to be $125 drivers back in the day. shipping of the speaker alone is over 100 pounds.
make a tennis-ball woofer with one of THOSE puppies, and write if your confuser survived turning it up. long been a dream of mine to whip one up, but never had the money or room....
if this is supposed to be a new economy, how come they still want my old fashioned money?
May the Base be with you!
Linux sucks. It is an underground OS that is completely unstandardized. Linux geeks, get the fuck over yourselves.
Pffft. Doesn't compare to Doc's speaker in "Back to the Future".
a nice tuned horn will always deliver more music. you're screwed if you move with this one, though.
if this is supposed to be a new economy, how come they still want my old fashioned money?
no more custom auto TV programs for you. enjoy the commute.
if this is supposed to be a new economy, how come they still want my old fashioned money?
That's nothing. This is a serious subwoofer.
This basstation isn't fully operational until you mount some green led's in the bracket of the woofer attached to a Non-mercury Vibration Switch (or color organ).
For over a thousand generations, the Jedi Knights were the gaurdians of peace in the galaxy.... before the dark times, before some bloke decided to make a mockery of my empire and put personal musical satisfaction above world domination.
"Hey Gary, why are we wearing bras on our heads?"
I think linking to eBay auctions is silly. You don't care about the things I have for sale do you?
Best Buy can have you arrested
For people who live in their own house, far far away in a distant galaxy, I bet this is fun. But how about all those people who use those subwoofers in a quiet neighborhood, or those folks who drive with their cars and big subwoofers through the apartment blocks and terrorize everybody with their noise? At traffic lights these mindless people turn up their subwoofers and make everybody feel sick. It hurts, it is an assault.
That damn thing better have a brown note filter, or we're in a world of shit.
--
make install -not war
A deathstar subwoofer would have been cool in '77.
Well first of all that's a bit off topic as this is a 12" (30.48cm) subwoofer packaged in a heavy object. I'll assume that people actually want to know how much Helium they will need to dangle it fron a cord behind their car.
Given the weight on the page, and assuming the baloon's weight is compensated for by you NOT doing this at 0c you would need around 242 250L of helium that's a sphere about 7m across, at 0c...
That's about £183 of helium. Plus balloon and cord. This is MUCH larger than a weather balloon.
A sphere will have one big resonance - one note bass here we come !
Seriously, that's the funniest damn thing I've ever read on here. +10 Funny needs to be invented just for this one post!
This item is in the same town as me... this makes me want to buy it.
5 ,00.asp...
I have seen Tie Fighter computer case mods too.. http://www.extremetech.com/article2/0,1558,182367
Imagine the look of this on it.
Beautiful.
-
Warfire
"And now, your highness, we will discuss the location of your hidden rebel bass."
Item title: Death Star Home Cinema Subwoofer
Time left: 18 hours 25 minutes 38 seconds
OMG!! It's coming!
isn't a sphere the worst possible shape for a loudspeaker due to standing wave problems?
No no no.... with the awesome power of this battlestation,
All your bass are belong to the empire.
-- "This world is a comedy to those who think, a tragedy to those who feel."
-using my subwoofer? ten thousand, all in advance.
-10 thousand!? we could buy our own subwoofer for that much!
-sure kid but who's gonna install it? You?
-You bet, i'm not such a bad installer myself!
Oops, my nerd is showing. *zip*
Inventive and hilarious*. I haven't laughed so much since someone confused Unsolicited Bulk Email with a can of spiced ham.*
* Not.
Many Bose died to bring us this information
I've got some photographs, I'd like to show them to you. Though you don't know the girls You'll recognise the view..
It shows your lack of commercial nous that you didn't think "somewhere out there are a bunch of 'Max Power' readers willing to fork out their stolen^w hard-earned cash for a piece of crap gimmick like that".
:)
Or maybe it shows your sense of social responsibility that you didn't put it into production
In this case it's actually a pretty cool Star Wars gadget even if you're not a fan of the movies.
You have to be a nerd not to realise that this is an oxymoron.
Hmm... Not sure if I want plaques being ablated away from my arterial walls in an uncontrolled, medically unsupervised fashion
He could even have Vader mind-choke the environmentalists.
Art imitates life. Or, in this case, death.
So I guess at least eBay (hopefully) should be able to handle the Slashdotting! I mean, it would be pretty funny if we brought down eBay (even if it is just the UK portion).
Homer no function beer well without.
I love the questions to the seller, but I'm not registering for ebay, so here's my contribution to "Ask the seller a question":
Evacuate? In our moment of triumph?
I think his name is Token.....
That's it! Now I remember. His name is J.R.R. Token.
This is A|_A|_A all the way down.
Except for me that is.
I'm smarter than the average bear.
Or at least smaller one.
A smaller sphere could be built with a 10" or 12" sub. completely enclosed inside, with a port (at about 6" diameter) for the Death stars "Ultimate Weapon/indent"
If you could reason with religious people, there would be no religious people
Yeah, but those stupid Bothans botched the mission and wasted their lives. After all, didn't the new Death Star turn out to be nothing more than a big trap for the Rebel Fleet? I mean, talk about bad WMD intelligence! If I were a Rebel Fleet commander who lost a few capital ships to that trap, I'd want to string up a few of those Bothans myself! But not until the day after the Rebel victory party, of course...
I know I am.
[SIGH]
"A great democracy must be progressive or it will soon cease to be a great democracy." --Theodore Roosevelt
...because it makes it impossible for the sides to flex with variations in air pressure. Incredibly important factor in a ported sub box if you are trying to load the driver optimally. The enclosure volume is alread at a maximum for a given surface area. That said, I notice a *lot* of internal bracing was used. Definitely useful in a box, but probably not here.
either funny or redundant. whatever.