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Advice You Would Give to Your 12 Year-Old Self?
urbazewski asks: "If you could send a message back to your nerdy
unpopular 12 year old self, what would you say? I've been asking this one for several years, and the replies sound suspiciously like the lame advice I got from adults at that age ('just be yourself, dear'). The most creative answer was from an American-born Buddhist monk, who didn't think his 12 year old self would
listen to a message along the lines of 'Hey, what you're doing is kind of making things suck for me right now' --- he would send
a message to himself by adding extra lyrics to a song he really liked when he was in junior high school. I got the best replies from a large class at
UC Santa Cruz. The modal answer was 'Buy Microsoft.' About 7% of the class said 'Enjoy yourself in high school because college is really hard.' Another 7% said "Study harder in high school because college is really hard.' (The
best variant on that theme: 'Try to figure out what "studying" is'). In the hindsight-is-20/20 dept. there was a girl who said 'Do not date the
following people...' and then listed six names and a guy who said 'You know how you're thinking about trying to drive your dad's car? Don't!.' My personal favorite: 'You're a dork now, but don't worry, you'll be cool when
you're in college.'"
Drugs are bad...mmmkay
Did I get the first post on /. ?
If not, I would tell my 12 y/o self to get the first post.
If at first you don't succeed... How does that go again? Ah, forget it.
Oh god, the itching, the itching!
USE A CONDOM!!!
Stay away from computers. They ruin your social life.
register slashdot.org
I'd say "Don't go into IT! Be an engineer like Mom and Dad want!!" ;)
Be very, very careful what you put into that head, because you will never, ever get it out. -Thomas Cardinal Wolsey
"You know what, just forget it, you won't listen to anything i say anyway..."
Don't post so much lame stuff on /.
Brice, work hard to convince mom & dad to move out of the Midwest ... at least to the southwest, northwest, or abroad. That way, you'll have a chance of making GOOD money AND working on interesting projects for a long amount of time.
Yeah, that's right, kill yourself, you heard me.
I want to find out if a fundamental paradox really causes the universe to end! I mean, suicide is not my bag, but if I had the chance to take all of you with me...
It Is the Nature of Information to Transgress Artificial Boundaries
Train your left hand for next year.
Don't let Christy Wilson go :)
Religion is a gateway psychosis. -- Dave Foley
First one to reply :?
Learn : what is important in life.
That girl you're going to meet your second year of college? Marry her.
Two bits of advice:
1) Don't go to college until you're ready to study hard, because if you don't study hard at undergrad, other options are not as easily accessible to you in the future. (Graduate school, doctoral study, etc...)
2) Play sports. If you're any good, it'll get you laid, and no matter what will make you a well-rounded person who can fight like hell for something, but accept defeat if you must.
Who did what now?
more chickn
Never turn down a chance to get laid.
Oh, and buy Cisco stock in 1998 and sell it in Jan 2000.
Period.
Karma: The shiznight, mostly because I am the Drizzle.
"Self, in 4 years you're going to meet a really nice girl at a party. This time guy some fucking condoms!"
Trolling is a art,
never visit slashdot.org... hardest addiction to break
Go to church, become a boy scout, and listen to Rush Limbaugh to counteract the left-wing brainwashing given by the public school system.
don't waste your time reading slashdot; do something useful instead.
don't pass up the best years of your life. get laid, over and over and over again. there will be time enough for slashdot/computers/programming when you're older and impotent.
err, wait, not that this has happened to me....
We're like rats, in some experiment! -- George Costanza
I would have no advise to give. I ended up exactly where I wanted to be when I started planning my life out at age 12. More nookie would have been nice, but girls only take up your time nad spend your money
Start saving. Now. Put 15-20% of every penny your earn in the bank (or IRA, or other investments). You'll be debt free and have enough to retire on by the time you're 45.
Sadly, I don't have a time machine, so I'm on the "work until I'm 65" route.
-S
--- What parts of "shall make no law", "shall not be infringed", and "shall not be violated" don't you understand?
if anybody even looks at you crosseyed, stick a knife in them right away, or word will get around that you're a patsy and it will take you a whole lifetime to live it down.
You're dumb, but that shouldn't be too surprising since you're 12. When you get the chance to enter a running start program as a sophomore, do it. With high school comes stupid heartache, and an early exit will save you lots of heartache.
But, in order to accomplish that, you must ignore your evil best friend, Adam. He will bring you Warcraft II, which will consume an inordinate amount of your time and eventually lead you to Diablo and Starcraft. Which is like heroin to you.
In summary: Get away from high school and addictive Blizzard products.
Lose some weight fatty.
Never, ever, ever click a goatse.cx link. That image will forever be burned on my retina...shudder....
I wonder how many of us would send a warning about catastrohpic events...and try and avoid them.. Or perhaps we would all give ourselves a few betting tips for maybe the superbowl?
But get out in Y2K.
... you insensitive clod!
Play more sports. You won't learn anything in high school anyway, so you might as well not get picked on while you are there.
"Just do it. You know the smart thing to do and say, don't hold back."
and: "Next Thursdays winning lotto numbers are:..."
-Matt
--- Need web hosting?
science is a religion
What makes you think I was a nerdy ... oh, never mind.
"Liquor before beer."
"No, you don't want to find out if the Pop-Rocks-and-Pepsi urban legend is rooted in reality or not."
"Skip the prequels."
"Mod trolls down."
-/-
Mikey-San
Mikey-San
Karma: +Eleventy billion (mostly affected by watching Celebrity Jeopardy)
Buy Microsoft. ;-)
You might as well mark this as flamebait!
I was just thinking the other day about how if I hadn't be so shy in HS, I would have been knee deep in the girls. I found out years later that many girls had crushes on me. It eventually occured to me that my low-self esteme was silly. But that wasn't until I was in my early twenties. I think sitting my 12 y.o. self down and explaining a thing or two on this subject would have completely changed my life...
Dear 12 year old me,
Someday your mom is gonna want to "get rid of some of your old junk" by which she means baseball cards, your first gen Transformers, and probably those really nice old school metal Tonka trucks. Do NOT let her!
Thanks,
your 24 year old self
do not read this line twice.
Let's see here, I'd tell myself to pay more attention to school and not be so lazy, so that in the future I wouldn't have to relearn everything when I start being interested in this stuff... buuuut... like the Monk said I wouldn't listen to THAT so... hmmmm...
:o)
I think "Stop being an ass, make people feel good when they talk to you" might have an effect on me, took me long enough to figure it out!
-Don.
Cwm, fjord-bank glyphs vext quiz
Oh, and I'd probably tell myself to go on that bike ride with katie, she might be a bit wierd but she's also damn hot, and that kind of thing doesn't happen as often as TV makes you think it will.
s/guy/buy/g
Trolling is a art,
Dear Self: You know all those things that you're hiding from your parents (report cards, alcohol, drugs, women) so they won't find out? Well, they already know. Have a good day!
"This food is problematic."
I know I'd ignore me, but I'd tell myself to get a life and hope that I wouldnt ignore me like I know I would
Perhaps, since I know I'd ignore me, I would force myself to go to a club or something and meet other people who had their future selves telling them to go to clubs aswell
Hmmm - come to think of it, I'm supprised that the first post wasnt relating to the south park episode "My future self and I" - ah well, I'm sure there will be plenty more opertunities
All your age are belong to us.
You're just an incompetent lazy fuck.
1. Get in shape - I started lifting weights too late in life and ended up hurting myself.
2. Invest in Intel, Microsoft, Apple and Cisco - 100 bucks in each company
3. Learn spanish
4. When you have that desire to drive 120 mph out on Highway 212 - don't, there might be a South Dakota Highway Patrolman there in the dark
5. Take more math classes
6. Take more automotive, welding and shop classes
7. Work to get out of high school in 3 years.
8. Girls come and go, don't get to wound up in a 17 year old chick
9. Don't buy a bunch of tapes or CDs now, Napster will come along someday
"Skip the computers -- play some football or something. And start chasing the girls *now*."
-b
If I wanted a sig I would have filled in that stupid box.
Beer then liquor, sicker, quicker.
Liquor then beer, never Fear.
I am become Troll, destroyer of threads
Wait, what did you think I meant?
Ask her out.
Duck.
Buy Microsoft shares
......
And Intel
And Yahoo
And whatever you do, don't marry that girl
Do not spread "09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0" over the internet, thank you.
In all honesty, that's what I'd say. Rather shallow, I know.
Hakunamatata....It doesn't matter, it's in the past.
I am who I am today because of the trials and tribulations of "growing up." To make any changes to that would result in a completly different person.
I needed to be a nerd in High School to learn self pride and relaince...I needed to get my heart broken once in college to learn my alcohol tolerances.. After that you pick up your pieces and move on to bigger and better things.
--Should work--
Go run over this dork named Bill. Don't ask, just do it.
It's had more affect on my life than I thought it would...
It will increase the odds of being "rescued" from you boring home life.
"I have an odd craving to whisper about those few frightful hours in that ill-rumored and evilly shadowed seaport of dea
Give him last week's Lottery numbers.
Why stop there? Give him all of last month's as well!
-Mark
1: Stay away from the girl up the street, she really is a tramp.
2: Smoke more pot... or is that less
3: Dont invest in Enron or Worldcom.
Seriously, nothing. I didnt make bad choices nor do I regret anything Ive done (except maybe item number 1). Without the life experiences Ive had, I wouldnt be where I am today, which is to say maybe not all that wealthy, but definitly happy. Now if I could give all my knowledge to my 12 year old self it would be a different story...
I lost out I feel on a good 6years of not being allowed net access due to pr0n fears my folks had. When I finaly did get it at age 17 I lernt at such a rapid pace I feel if I had pressured my folks more I could have got a better head start in the industry.
So I would tell myself to beg for the love of god for net access.
moo
Heres the list of winning Lotto numbers and here is the list of stocks you should buy...
Learn to love yourself, and everyone around you. It will give you great power in your life.
You shouldn't worry about what you could have done differently in the past. If you could send yourself a message and actually change something, there would be a whole new branch of problem and mistakes that you would most likely want to change again, and again... and again.
If you don't like something about yourself, don't fret over it. Change it starting now.
Then I would say the people who were popular at high school weren't actually investing in a skill... And that it didn't matter if I sucked at something when I was 12, the fact that I would start that early would make me phenomenal by the time I was 18 (I distincly remember thinking I couldn't start playing guitar at 15 because I thought I was too old -- WHATEVER).
Apart from that, any advice I'd have to give would be useless (regarding work and girls) because I really think I needed to go through all of that shit for myself - in any case, my father already told me what I would say now.
NT
All that jerking off does in fact make you go blind!
1. I'd send back one tip for sports betting so I could get my 12 year old self to win a nice chunk of change.
2. Tell myself to go get laid and buy a car.
Logic? Well, with those two out of the way, I could concentrate on the rest of my life without any distractions.
I don't think I'd offer a younger me any advice. 1) I doubt I'd even listen to the older me and 2) The person that I am now is a result of all my previous experiences both good and bad. I'm happy with where I'm at and where I'm going so I don't think I'd want to change that.
INVEST in Micro$oft!
Spend some of that money you're saving for college and do Spring Break right when you're a freshman or sophmore. You'll never get another chance.
Or go to Europe right out of school. Screw that idea of a job right away. They can wait a couple months.
Design for Use, not Construction!
Here's a newspaper from February 21, 2003. When all of these stocks are flying high in 1999-2000 SELL SHORT, SELL SHORT, SELL SHORT!!!
You should also bet to win on these horses on February 19th 2003.
Ever dream you could fly? Get up from the Flight Sim. I Fly
1. Most importantly, you are not always right, contrary to how you feel about most things. Make sure you research things thoroughly before you start to tell other people what you believe is right. There are many arguments you'll win and lose that you'll look back at and smack yourself for being such a wiseass, especially since you were completely wrong.
2. Girls are not worth your time. They are fun while you have them but man you regret it when they are gone. Plus, after you have one, you're hooked.
3. Go to Victoria School of Visual and Performing Arts as soon as you can. You'll be very happy there.
4. Don't drop piano lessons. You'll regret it when all of your friends are cool pianists and you are just starting again.
5. Listen to your father, play cards more often with your father, go out and play sports more with your father. When you leave for university, you'll really miss the few good times you did have with him.
6. Save your money. Don't buy stuff on a whim, make sure you want it first. There are lots of stuff you'll think is cool to own, but later on you'll kick yourself for spending so much on it.
7. Star Trek is not as cool as you think it is.
8. Be nice to your sisters, especially Peggy. You may not approve of her ways, but you can learn a lot from her.
9. Get rid of your damn huge glasses, and get smaller ones or contacts.
10. Stop watching TV, if need be, just use the computer. Full House isn't that good of a series.
11. Exercise more, or do more physical activity. It's worth it.
12. Get involved in the community more. At Vic, get involved in the arts scene more. You'll miss it when you are gone.
That should be enough I think.
But most importantly.
13. Don't fight all the time. You are not right 100% of the time, and it's not worth the stress of the arguments and the loss of friendships when you fight.
That's about it. Plus, you know the usual. Invest in Microsoft, etc.
~ kjrose
Because all adults will tell you is what they wished _they_ had done.
An Eye for an Eye will make the whole world blind - Gandhi
In high school you make fun of the dorks, and in college you make friends with them.
Apparently somewhere after graduation they figure out that we can help them do well on tests/homework.
Screw microsoft stock... I'd just tell my 12yr old self who won the major sporting events for the following few years... Money would compound exponentially... Oh.. possibly throw out the idea of patenting anything and everything related to "one click"...
Code, by Charles Petzold is what I'd give my 12 year old self. At that time 1984, my dad gave me the C Programming Language, the Unix Programming Environmnet, and a new computer loaded with a copy of Microsoft's XENIX operating system.
Geez, what was I thinking! While I was riding boats my friends set sail in ships to Silicon Valley.
I guess I'm programming now so I can't complain too much.
-Lucas
Given that, at 12, I was entering that period of life where I would do pretty much exactly the opposite of what anyone advised:
1. Don't take algebra, there's no practical use for that stuff.
2. Do all the cocaine you can get your hands on. The eighties will be much more fun that way...
3. Rush out and get laid by the first girl who will do it.
That's a pretty good start...
Trouble making decisions? Just flip for it.
In the future, you are going to write to your nerdy, unpopular self.
In the meantime, think of something witty, cuz this sucks!
Later!
"This food is problematic."
...because in about 10 years, you're going to be incredibly disappointed.
Either
Find a guy called bill gates, and let him borrow your pencils to bribe him to be your best friend
Or if I didnt want myself to sell my soul...
Register 100 accounts on icq, slashdot, and several others as soon as they are released - I saw an icq account go for $200 because it had a low UID!
Don't spend so much time worrying about and planning for the future--no matter how smart you think you are at 12, or 16, or 20, your plans never work out the way you expect them to--you can only control yourself--not the world around you.
Within reason, enjoy the present, make sensible decisions, and enjoy the time you have, since in the future, you'll look back and wish you had.
sig--we don't need no goddamn sig
Twelve... that would have been about 1989...
I'd tell me to get all the money I could, and when Dell goes public, buy all I can. Tell me to sell around 1999...
I can't say that I'd really tell my 12 year old self anything really...While I was in high school I maintained a nerd status but I also got involved in a lot of things like Band(percussion), Newspaper, and Theatre.
In my newspaper class I was the only one who knew anything about the macs in the calss so everybody started to really like me for the most part because I told them how to do stuff on the Macs.
I would have, if anything, told him that you can wait on girls, and that when you turn 17 you'll find the one that you'll eventually be married to for the rest of your life and love long after that =]
Play the following lottery number in the powerball on the following date: (list would go here)
I don't need no instructions to know how to rock!!!!
My favorite: claim frost pist w00t!
George Bush Jr.
Otherwise, he will start World War III
Because no matter how good a techie you are, if you can't convince the boss/customer/whoever, you lose.
(actually, this is to my 16-year-old self)
Buy lots of Microsoft stock and retire early.
... that I really would go blind if I kept doing *that*.
"Sex isn't a reason to live, just the reason you're alive."
Learn kung fu early..
Have more sex.. girls are not as easy after highschool..
Drop out of highschool..
ignore college..
start a dot com..
sell all your stock in 1999..
never listen to your parents.. what the fsck do they know..
At what price learning? At what cost wisdom? The price is a man's peace of mind, and the cost is his life.
I wanted to be cool when I was 12. I wanted to be accepted. So if my nerdy 23 year old self gave my nerdy 12 year old self advice...I'm not sure I would have listened. You don't become cool by listening to a nerd.
Remember the bell curve and where you are on it. That's why most people will not know what the hell you're talking about, and that's why you should cherish the people who do.
-- Fratz, human
In many ways 12 is too young - the best advice in the world is worthless if you don't have the ability to do anything about it.
But a few years later, I have some advice that I would give to my younger self - and that I'm still trying to follow past 40:
1. it's far better to regret things that you've done than things that you didn't risk. (Okay, maybe this isn't the best advice for a teenager...)
2. your PE teacher is an idiot, but time spent on physical fitness is not wasted. Get to the gym. Lift weights. Run. You'll get back the time spent today in increased productivity for years to come.
For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong. -- H L Mencken
lottery numbers, etc. pretty easy, next...
I didn't, and I wish I had. (don't we all?)
..."Stop masturbating so much. My eyesight is terrible 10 years from now.."
why run from Vincenzo?
Than you can decide whether I'm worth listening to.
My other sig is extremely clever...
I'd say, "Don't worry about getting shot down by girls. You'll never be able to have sex with high school girls again without serious legal consequences. Go for it. Time spent not having sex is time wasted."
Aside from that... life became excellent for me, starting exactly at the end of seventh grade. So I turned things around for myself at the age of 12. It just took the beginnings of some self confidence.
There are no trails. There are no trees out here.
FYI: Inflammable means flammable...
Buy MSFT as soon as it goes public.
The cake is a pie
...sell out, money really can make you happy.
--Keeping the flame wars alive, one post at a time
What if I tell myself something that gets me killed? Since I no longer exist, did I ever really give the advice? Will space time completley collapse? Will I get a version of 'Life, The Universe, and Everything: The home game'? Will I ever stop asking stupid questions?
There's a growing sense that even if The Future comes,
most of us won't be able to afford it.
-- Lemmy
Ask for an electric violin instead of a bass in four years; your fingers will never get long enough to play a bass comfortably. Don't get too infatuated with an English girl you'll meet in college; just enjoy her company and any kisses she throws your way. And be careful not to open up your PC around kittycats with big green eyes and puffy tails.
First off, I'd tell myself to appreciate how worry free life can be when you have no bills to pay. I would tell myself to take advantage of that.
Then I would say the people who were popular at high school weren't actually investing in a skill... And that it didn't matter if I sucked at something when I was 12, the fact that I would start that early would make me phenomenal by the time I was 18 (I distincly remember thinking I couldn't start playing guitar at 15 because I thought I was too old - WHATEVER).
Apart from that, any advice I'd have to give would be useless (regarding work and girls) because I really think I needed to go through all of that shit for myself - in any case, my father already told me what I would say now.
"Enjoy the beatings. When your step dad is done beating the shit out of you, everyone else is going to have a turn over the next few decades."
Im 30, i have a 15 year old neice. Im her uncle whos a bad influence. She has a very chauvanitsic dad, and an old fashoned mom who goes along with it. SO my sister and I have taken to buying her science related presents, advising her on how to start drinking in college, I taught her how to sharpen a knife properly for the girl scouts, and have basically told her all the stuff that i wish i had known at 15. Sex hasnt come up yet, but she hasnt asked.
All Troll + "offtopic" mods are meta moderated as "Unfair", because you abused the system.
It gets better.
This sig is not the Zahir. Lucky for you.
42 to 1 odds underdog Douglas is going to knockout Iron Mike Tyson in the 10th.
The above post is an editorial, the poster cannot and will not be held responsible for all or in part for it's contents
The next few years of your life will hurt, but live normally; things will turn out for the better over time, and eventually you will get to another place where you can, at last, stop being somebody you're not.
If I was telling this to a 12 year old guy, I would encourage him to surround himself with girls at all times. That's right, get laughed at when you take Home Economics in high school, are in marching band and work at a Flower shop. You'll always get the last laugh when you're going for a ride on the bone rollercoaster ;)
Not programming languages, but real (verbal/written) langugaes.. .. I've been struggling learning French, Japanese and German over the past 6 years, and wishing I had started at an earlier age..
Don't be afraid to ask for oral sex.
You are about to start the hardest 9 years of your life. Just remember that women will come and go, and jobs will come and go. Stick with your friends, because they will be with you through all of it.
;)
Oh, and in about 7 years you're gonna be out training on your bike, and you're gonna see a car come out of a driveway.... Trouble is, she isn't gonna see you. So slow down if you don't want some expensive dental work
It's not a bug, it's a feature
Bears win Superbowl in '85, they suck for many years to follow, so make the most of it while you can. Talk smack, all day, all year, then hide in shame until you hear the name "Urlacher".
I think we'd all enjoy a nice cold beverage. -David Letterman
learn c. it's not as hard as it looks.
My advice to my past self: "If you ever travel back in time, don't step on anything."
Especially if you are at work. Not a good thing for sure. ARG
Der Tod ist der einzige Weg hier raus!
a few years from now, there will be a website (you'll know this when you need to) going suspiciously under the name of "slashdot". Stay away from this place.
Send a Red Hat 8.0 CD back.
M@
Krispy Cream is people
LISTER: So, listen, man. You've lived my life for the last five years.
So, what's the single most important piece of advice that you can give
me?
FUTURE LISTER: (thinks hard) Erm. Oh, yeah. Three years from now,
you'll go through a cosmic storm and end up in a parallel universe.
You'll materialise on an exact replica of Earth in the year 1989.
You'll want to go to the theatre. Whatever you do, don't go and see
"Run For Your Wife."
Go to the top of the WTC on September 9, 2001. LEAVE NEW YORK THE NEXT DAY.
Fight back for Christ sakes and don't distinguish between children and adults, and the big people don't know everything but believe often they do.
Stay at home after school ...
At around between 6 and 7 PM I had a rather severe accident on my bike resulting in my brain damage, loss of my near photographic memory, my rather good ability to concentrate (like being able to do difficult homework when surrounded by 5 crying and screaming kids and their parrents) and got a rather nasty black eye as well.
That's the ONE day I'd want to change in my entire life. Period.
Of course, I'd kinda like to see how I'd end up before actually going though with it - there are some people that I'd rather not have to be without.
Other than that - no good advice, no "buy Microsoft" or anything. Just "stay at home that day - trust me".
We do not live in the 21st century. We live in the 20 second century.
s''$/=\2048;while(<>){G=29;R=142;if((@a=unqT="C*", _)[20]&48){D=89;_=unqb24,qT,@2 5,_;H=73;O=$b[4]<<9& (Q>>12^Q>>4^Q/8^Q))<<17,O=O>>8^(E&(F=(S=O>>14&7^O) T ,"\xb\ntd\xbz\x14d")[_/16%8]);EG ^=12*(U-2?0:S&17)),H^=_%64?12:0,@z)[_%8]}(16..271) )[_]^((D>>=8T ,@a}';s/[D-HO-U_]/\$$&/g;s/q/pack+/g;eval
b=map{ord qB8,unqb8,qT,_^$a[--D]}@INC;s/...$/1$&/;Q=unqV,qb
|256|$b[3];Q=Q>>8^(P=(E=255)
^S*8^S<<6))<<9,_=(map{U=_%16orE^=R^=110&(S=(unq
^=(72,@z=(64,72,
)+=P+(~F&E))for@a[128..$#a]}print+q
GO OUTSIDE!!!!
Seriously though, I'd tell myself that sports, looks, and things like that (all the superficial stuff) really does matter, and that being pretty and in shape will help you in life just as much as writing your own encryption program. Maybe also point out that spending a little less time in front of the computer and a little more time outside really wouldnt adversely affect my tech skills as much as I was afraid it would.
Considering how much time I spent playing games in my youth and how much school I skipped as a result, I'd probably tell my 12 year old self this...
"You're going to lose the Quake match that you skipped your High School graduation dance to play in, and you're going to feel like a big dork for doing so. Go to the dance dumbass."
Twenty-five years from now, when you post on slashdot, read the whole article rather then responding to the title, so you don't look like a putz, responding with a "joke" that's in the article itself.
The cake is a pie
"Hey, who gives a crap what your life is like now, how f'ing cool is this going to be when you're 31?!"
Trolls lurk everywhere. Mod them down.
but not too much!
Emacs: for people who just never know when to
Psudo-serious: "Do not go out with that girl your senior year in HS! She will ruin the next ten years for you WRT women."
Totally-serious: "Tell your dad you love him more often and spend more time with him. You will not have him around as long as you think."
--
If I actually could spell I'd have spelled it right in the first place.
Start learning Kung Fu, ASAP.
More importantly, make sure there is something you can learn from them. It's always better to work with people more experienced than you are who teach you things.
All those time you do it when yer out of college- make sure you only do it with that chick, no one else.
Oh, and do more programming when yer in HS, it's the only time you ever really had to learn.
And read more books.
And when you fall in love with yer best friend, tell her soon, or prepare for a ruined life.
...spike
Ewwwwww, coconut...
I proberly wouldnt say much, as I feel even with the crappy debts Im in, and crappy places Ive lived.. Im content with life.. and that just isnt worth risking.
Its funny, life; like that.
moo
Sports Almanac, and if some kid or crazy old man comes around asking questions...
I've learned that any embaressment incurred in Jr. High and High School don't really matter later on. So take the chance when you are afraid of being embaressed, in the long run you only have something to gain.
"Not knowing when the dawn will come, I open every door." - Emily Dickinson
...given that, at 12, I was entering that period of life where I would do pretty much exactly the opposite of what anyone advised:
1. Don't take algebra, there's no practical use for that stuff.
2. Do all the cocaine you can get your hands on. The eighties will be much more fun that way...
3. Rush out and get laid by the first girl who will do it."
That's a pretty good start!
What about
"You're a dork now, but don't worry. You'll be getting paid well for it in a few years."
...all the kids who make fun of you now because you are a geek will later have jobs in the tech industry or the fast food industry.
Spend the next couple of years learning some C, and a bit of OS theory - you're already thinking about those kinds of things anyway (when you're not arguing with your mates about lord of the rings). In '91, drop an email to torvalds@klaava.Helsinki.FI (get yourself an email account, you'll need one), and ask if there's anything you can do to help on that minix project.
Then when the Red Hat IPO happens, take the shares, but remember to SELL!!
Learn to start dealing with it now.
Oh, just come out now. You play the flute, everyone already knows...
1) The nerdy girl in your morning science class is going to be beautiful at 22 when you run into her in college. The hot little girl in your homeroom will be neither.
2) Don't, don't, don't think it'll be a good idea to use the dog clippers to trim the top of your head. You'll miss and need to make up some excuse that you were checking for 666.
3) Don't use silicone spray to lubricate the lawnmower. The gases are very flammable and you'll singe your lungs.
4) Have absolutely no moral dillemma about having fun with your girlfriend's hot little friend. Your girlfriend will dump you a week later for the SWAT sergeant.
5) Late at night, when everything is dark, do not blindly drink from the 1/2 gallon plastic jug in the back of the fridge. It will *look* like lemonade, but....
6) Have fun. Have lots of fun. Take lots of classes, even ones you don't need.
What I want to know is
Where did you grow up and why did I miss out on the action?!?!?!?
We do not live in the 21st century. We live in the 20 second century.
Being the father a several teenagers I can tell with a certainty that this discussion is all moot. There isn't a 12-year old alive that would listen to anything that someone older had to say. Keep thinking those happy thoughts.
-- Dave Johnston, WD6AOE Networking/Telecom Consultant Ukiah, CA
"Don't worry, you're on the right path. BTW, you might as well start martial arts now. Trust me, you'll love it."
"At times, you'll have the urge to regret the past (er, future - you know) and wonder what you could have done differently, what you might have told yourself to change the way things went. Ignore that urge. What matters is what you're about to do next, regardless of where you're currently hanging on the thread of your life. Focus on that instead of pointless second-guessing like 'what would I tell my 6 year-old self?'"
"Oh hell, just memorise the names of these stocks..."
My 12 year old self would not listen to my 24 year old self. My younger self would consider my older self either unimportant or an idiot.
At the age of 22, you will be offered a chance to send the 12-year-old self an advice. do send one smarter than the one you have been sent right now!
Judging from the quantity of "first post!/natalie portman!" comments, I thought most Slashdot readers were 12 years old right now!
;-)
\me ducks
I really think I'd just tease my 12 year old self who'd be sitting there playing NES, with fantastic tales of the Gamecube and PS2, and then disappear into the night.
Never ever, take your best friend's girlfriend.
(Modified my original post)
Trolls lurk everywhere. Mod them down.
Bet that in 2000, someone would lose the election by half a million votes and still become president (yes, I know the vote was in 99)
Bet that the Bucs would win a game where the temp was under 40 degrees.
Short Eron stock. (remember, the stock market is just legalized gambling =)
Department of Homeland Security: Removing the rights real patriots fought and died for since 2001
I suppose I'd also say something about studying more, but it'd have little effect, since I have known that for a long time, without doing much about it. So I think that instead of giving me some "useful" advice I'd try with this:
"Learn programming properly in C and stay away from BASIC." I started with computers a bit late, and some of my skills are getting somewhat useless. Sure writing code in qbasic was fun, and I even got a few games done in it, but learning C would have been far more valuable.
I'd give my 12 year old self an envelope to open when I hit 18 that says... you FOOL date every woman you can get your hands on, have lots and lots and lots of fun... 18-25 year old women are dynamite and you'll hate yourself when you see how great they look compared to the 35 year old women you date now....
basically get as much tail (safely) as you can get because you aren't going to get any when you are older.
Oh and how to get all that tail? simple.. just fricking talk to them. Women like to be talked to and usually date the guys that walk up and say "hi, I'm _____." and they always ignore the idiots with pickup lines.
finally.... dont waste any time in bars.. you get way more tail opportunities at the mall/work/school..
Ok it's sexist, and downright wrong... but I find myself too many times today noticing a group and mentioning to whomever I am eating lunch with.. " I sure wish I was 21 again but with the knowlege I have now.. I'd do things VERY different.
rule #1... have fun (good fun) make it a point to date as many people as you can, and stay in the education arena as long as you can... getting married at 20 just as you are finishing your bachelors is pure stupidity... get married after you are all done with school and running around the planet because you wont get to do it until you get to 60 otherwise.
Do not look at laser with remaining good eye.
To leave on a happy ending, that changed when I was 16, a junior in high school and running the computer lab (literally -- they paid me a salary). All the kids a year older than me (my brother's crowd) figured that they had to pass the computer requirement to graduate, so they all made friends with me. And not in a "do my homework for me" kind of way, but in a way that actually made me feel like they appreciated my help. Of course it also helped that all the hot girls knew how to work the situation, too. And my popularity with the older kids gave me confidence to face my peers and not be intimidated. In a way that too was competition, because I was basically exuding the vibe to kids my own age that I was better than them because all the other kids were talking about how important I was.
www.HearMySoulSpeak.com
Our society's glamorization of high school is sickening to me. All these movies and tv shows portray high school as the apex of one's life. This is simply a lie. If high school is the highlight of your life then something is very very sad and/or wrong.
Other than that I wouldn't tell myself too much. It would ruin the surprises. I certainly wouldn't tell myself who I was going to marry for instance. In fact doing so would probably prevent it from happening.
Lasers Controlled Games!
But more than 'Buy X', it would be something like:
'93 Buy AOL, 2/96 SELL, 4/96 BUY, 7/98 SELL, 10/98 BUY, 12/98 SELL SELL SELL (then SHORT)
But, then, I guess I'd need to deal with all those taxes after the sells.
Oh, well...
I have a couple of things I'd say to 12-year-old self:
-Turkey
Don't let mom throw away that Commodore 64!
Note to 12 yr old self:
You know that copy of Borland C++ your father just bought you? It's not a monitor-stand! You might consider learning that now, and not listening to the fool of a teacher who said that PASCAL would be the root of all future programming. She's a divy!
I would send me my brand new sig. and shout it to my professor when they ask about my homeworks!
Prof: DanyBoy, have you finished your homeworks?
Me: F$*# that...Punt it to Longhorn!
Explaining to her that this will be how the biggest software company will do things in the future!
I'd rather be sailing...
dear 12 year old self: just let it die
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
...instead, turn down all those RELATIONSHIPS. Stick to random banging.
Also, stick with track and football through high school, and stop with that fairy orchestra nonsense.
Get contacts as early as possible.
When you get to Michigan, f*cking STUDY! And pay attention to your GOD DAMN bills! Full scholarship does NOT mean everything is paid for, asshat! And QUIT using credit cards that you can't pay the bills on! Then we can get a f*cking CAR before we're NINETY! Oh, and don't tell Candice you like her, just stick your d*ck in her. Repeat with various other females.
*pant pant*
Sorry. Got carried away.
El riesgo vive siempre!
omg pND 4eva
Don't waste your time and energy fighting unnecessary battles...decide what positive things you want to do and focus on them.
Don't worry about the way people are treating you right now...only a few years and you'll be out from under them.
Think (HARD) about the actions you're about to take. You can really screw things up for yourself for a long, long time if you do stupid things.
You will find love.
Don't worry...everything'll work out fine.
Being as I was born with heavy metals poisoning that wasn't discovered until I 36 years old, I'd tell myself to have a red blood cell mineral assay with heavy metals to save me an ungodly amount of trouble.
man you look good and wear this shirt, girls love it
a te .jpg
http://www.badlandsgames.com/priv_media/first_d
(warning: bad language on shirt)
- MOSKIE
and sell it all about the time redhat stock goes IPO.
Me at 12: Uh-huh.
Me: Then you append to that curse-word a noun or or verb-plus-"er" at the end of it.
Me at 12: Okay...
Me: And the bigger-sounding that last word is, the cooler the put-down will be. Like "ass-master".
Me at 12: Ass-master.
Me: Cool. Butt-lord.
Me at 12: Butt-lord!
Me: Now those kids won't have any put-downs better than yours.
Hey, I would have had a much smoother time in junior high. :)
And for Gord's sake, stay in college until they kick you out, because once you hit the real world, that's it, party's over.
The cake is a pie
All your base are belong to us. :)
Or, by changing the paths and actions you took in life, you might inadvertently cause your past self to end up in the wrong place at the worst possible time... like in the path of a runaway bread truck, f'rinstance.
So, advice is out of the question. I'd probably just limit my activities to finding other kids who tried their damndest to make me miserable at that age, and summarily beating the tar out of them. ;-)
take the blue pill.
1- Pacifism is good, but you still need to defend your self.
2- Kick that bully in the balls.
3- Repeat 2.
Buy the following stocks and sell them all in January 2000 then do whatever the hell you want to do. DELL MSFT NSCP JDSU AMZN YHOO
My note to my 12 year old self would be relatively simple. "Dance lessons were not the way to get girls that you thought they were. It is one hell of a way to get your arse kicked around the play ground"
1. Holly is not as smart as you make her out to be...go after her and get her to dump that other guy...
2. Get your parents to talk to the school and get you into the gifted classes so you have some fun inschool and are with people you can actually get along with.
3. Renee is a slut don't waste your time...
4. Buy Yahoo, Red Hat, Microsoft
5. When you meet Heather don't be an idiot and waste 10 years she likes you, be more agressive and get things rolling earlier
6. High Technology job get into it earlier
7. Don't resist the web
Power Corrupts,Absolute Power Corrupts Absolutely, leaving one person(group)in charge is absolutely corrupt.
Ok, first I would inform myself that I should stick with programming on the apple IIe at school, as this is will help me stick to computers, and not have that 10 year hyatis I took.
Second, I'd tell myself to get back to my grandparents' house. Live with them. That way I'd be the only child at home, and I'd have the computer in my room.
Oh, and to never EVER say 'no' to a girl. Stupid stupid stupid me....
They stuck me in an institution, said it was the only solution, to...protect me from the enemy, myself
Get Laid!
The next two years or so will really suck, but people will eventually mature and life gets better, and then college will be incredible.
When I was twelve years old, I didn't have the slightest interest in having sex with anyone, and yet almost every comment here runs along the lines of: "have as much sex as you can!"
This is pretty crummy advice. Meaningless sex seems great to people who don't get any, but it kinda sucks in the long run. You don't develop real relationships with girls and tend to treat them as inferior. This is the worst preparation you can get for college and later on - you'll be one of the guys that can't stay in a lasting relationship and ends up not getting married for a long time, if ever.
I was a 6th grader at Trinity Elementary as a twelve year old. I didn't worry about girls, like lots of other people; I played lots of basketball, baseball, and golf, read lots of books (and computer magazines... *sigh*), and went to as many Braves games as I could. The one thing I would say to twelve-year-old Kyle is this: In the coming years, you will fail. Small and large, failure is inevitable. Don't be afraid! If you want something or someone pursue your goal with tenacity and without fear; if you fail, dust yourself off, get back up and keep trying.
And if that doesn't work, sell your xerox now and put it all in Amazon. Then sell Amazon and buy a ferrari.
beware the jabberwock, my son! the jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Advice I'd give to my 12 year old self:
Call social services, get the bitch put away, move to Florida, and start figuring out why you feel so weird all the time. Oh, and convince Dad to invest everything in Microsoft, at least until 97, then dump it. Finally, use this contact to prove that reality doesn't behave like everybody thinks it does, and parley that into a degree.
That's what I'd say.
and introduce him to girls and beer in high school. He'll never get anything done.
Buy Microsoft and then try to throw Gates out.
The advice I would give to myself:
1. Work hard, because, while hard work may not always pay off, laziness will always catch up to you.
2. Don't be afraid to try something different.
3. Don't feel afraid to say "no" when asked to do something; don't put pleasing others above your needs.
4. Strive to find a common ground with your parents; they can be your most valuable allies.
5. Everything will one day become dust; permanence is a lie.
6. Distinguish yourself in school, as it will make you more successful later.
7. Develop intimate relationships with a few people, and casual friendships with everybody. Your intimate relationships will provide emotional support and your casual friendships will provide opportunities.
I want to find out if a fundamental paradox really causes the universe to end! I mean, suicide is not my bag, but if I had the chance to take all of you with me...
But the chances are that you will simply horrify your 12 year old self by imploding as soon as the 12 year old understands who you are. Meeting yourself is generally embarassing, but altering your life would obviously invalidate your existance and you would dissapear in a puff of logic.
He didn't know the gun was loaded!
Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.
Hey man in a few months Al Gore is going to invent the internet. That doenst mean much to you now but some day your going to make alot of money off of it. But in 2000 sell it all and retire. The investment guys dont know what they are talking about sell it pay the taxes and retire.
First, I would remind myself to turn off javascript when javascript becomes available. Then, I would tell myself not to click at http://superfun.30e.com(because javascript is worse than the goatsex thing).
I wouldn't say a damn thing to the little snot nosed moron. The school of hard knocks got me where I am today and it'll do him some good to toughen up a little.
The same goes for my future self. Screw him! I know I hate my 2 weeks ago self for laceing the code with idiotic bugs that I HAVE TO FIX! My future self can just hate me for putting off doing this refactoring and procrastinating about working-out.
HA, take that bastard!
=Shreak
(I was 12 in 1977)
1) Start learning Tae Kwon Do - it's a better fit than Karate.
2) As soon as you are old enough, buy lots of AR-15's and street sweepers. Hold them until the Democrats get into power. Sell for big profit.
3) Save as much money as you can - on your first job, put all your overtime pay into investments (see #2, above).
4) Don't do business with United Engines Specialists in Wichita - they don't understand how to connect an oil pump.
5) Get Mom to stop smoking. Failing that, after her first bought with cancer, insist she be checked every six months by a competent oncologist.
6) Don't go to the hospital in Ark City (see #5).
7) Learn Z80 assembly, write a BASIC interpreter, release it to all who wish to use it, with the proviso that they have to give others the same distribution rights you gave them.
www.eFax.com are spammers
KILL Bill Gates!!!!
KILL Bill Gates!!!!
KILL Bill Gates!!!!
Buy RedHat.
Stay out of the arcade.
Work out.
Sell everything you own, buy four boxes of M:TG Beta. Do NOT open them.
Prepare for the divorce.
Exercise.
Study in school. That 65 average will fuck you like you'd never believe.
Black clothing is OK as long as there's something else in the drawer.
Did I mention exercise?
Am I the only one who heard Roxette to sing "I'm gonna get blitzed for some sex"?
If I said anything to me I would have learned and now I would want to say something different but If I said anything to me I would have learned and now I would want to say something different but If I said anything to me I would have learned and now I would want to say something different but If I said anything to me I would have learned and now I would want to say something different but
Everything you do to your parents now, your offspring are going to do to you in 25 years time
My first thought was I would tell myself...when you break up with her STAY AWAY...but then I thought if I did that I would be in a very different place right now. So even though I had a bad time for a while. I like who I am now. Instead I would tell myself to make sure I lived with NO REGRETS...I've found that even when you make a mistake that way you chalk it up to ignorance and don't make it again and don't spend the next 3 months crying over it.
ME: Pssst. Wake up!
YOUNG ME: What is it? Who are you?
ME: Look, don't be afraid. I'm going to make you rich.
(In the bed behind the young me, Thickie HOLDEN stirs. At the word "rich" he sits
up and pays attention.)
ME: All you've got to do is listen very, very carefully.
(YOUNG ME would nod dutifully.)
ME: Right, this is the plan. You're going to invent a thing called
"The Tension Sheet."
HOLDEN: Pension Sheet?
ME: T! T! T! Tension, TENsion sheet! Will you shut up? I'm
trying to talk to the kid! (Turns back to Young ME.) Are you
listening? They're little sheets of paper with lots of air bubbles in
them.
HOLDEN: Like you get in packing paper?
ME: Look, do you mind, Holden? This is a private conversation. Go
back to sleep! (Turns back to his younger self.) They're exactly the
same as the ones you get in (Glares at HOLDEN) packing paper, but you
paint them red.
HOLDEN: Why red?
ME: Because it helps people relax! Will you shut up, I'm trying to
make the kid rich! (He notices that YOUNG ME is having great
difficulty writing.) You'd write better if you took off your boxing
gloves. Now, have you got all that?
YOUNG ME: (Taking off his boxing gloves) I fink so.
ME: First thing tomorrow, take the idea down to the patent office.
YOUNG ME: I can't. Not first fing in the morning. I've got extra
rugby practice because I'm so wet.
And I think we all know the rest
...you should vote for the Democrats.
every other piece of advice is crap.
Cuz "Tasty-Wheat" is not all that it is cracked up to be...
...in college. Accept it.
Blar.
1) Finish highschool. Yea buddy, you know that staying up to late nights playing that game team fortress and running your clan is going to be a contributing factor to failing highschool. Don't do it. Not finishing highschool causes you to slum around until your 20 and not get started on life until late, even if everything pans out in the end.
2) You know that whole computer thing you got going, yea. programming and building computers is a neat and fun, but listen it makes you awkward socially, so stop it play sports, cause you're going to hate computers when it becomes your career anyway. Sports will never be your career, so do it while you can.
3) dont quit sports because you're too much of a pussy to do some laps. yeah, football practice as a freshman is tough, but you're going to miss alot of competitive fun, and lose what friends you had because of your focus on computers and other geeky shit.
4) yeah, uhm, you know that game everquest... yeah, don't do it.
I'd tell myself to find out who I am and from that understanding, trust myself and not be swayed so easily by the masses. Truly look inside for peace and then once that's done, work on my relationships with others.
Also, get involved more. Join clubs and try to befriend everyone you meet, it'll make life more interesting.
Of course, such general advice can apply whether your 12, 32, or 72...
I would tell myself "The winners of the next 20 Kentucky Derbies are...".
Never argue with a man carrying a water buffalo
Watch out for that car you're gonna ride your bike into two years from now.
"I only speak the truth"
Karma: null(Mostly affected by an unassigned variable)
a fag
Don't EVER voluntarily commit yourself to a mental hospital! You are not that crazy but everyone from then on will think you are.
I'd tell myself more than one thing:
DOn't stop: beat Kevin's ass into the ground so he can't get back up. EVER.
Don't quit football.
DO NOT BOTHER WITH ALEXA.
get laid. Often.
The advice you should give your 12-year-old self is obvious. "Don't submit stupid questions to Ask Slashdot. Just because everybody else does something doesn't mean you have to do it, too."
Beware, Nugget is watching... See?
What if I did go back and tell my 12-year-old self something and that my life wouldn't have been even worse if I hadn't. What if what I told myself set off a chain of events that caused something even worse to happen. My head hurts.
Yoda of Borg am I! Assimilated shall you be! Futile resistance is, hmm?
Spend more time with your dad because he's going to get cancer and die when you're 21. You'll really miss him and the rift that you've created between the two of you will make you wish you'd spent more time with him while he was alive.
You might also try to get him to see a doctor and screen him for cancer when you're 19. Maybe you can prevent his having to go through chemotherapy and all those surgeries.
nt
Buy AT&T stock
Patent Gui interface, operating system for personal computer, graphical interface assembled from text tags, one-click shopping, auction over a network, business over a network, sound and video over a network and then don't enforce them, saying the world is free to do with these as they please.
Don't spend so much time reading slashdot.
Get a summer job in a national park, to meet girls!
Spend at least a year travelling overseas.
Read Watership Down every spring.
Do not trade in your vinyl records for CDs
Set a doctor appointment on June 19th, 1986
Don't stress it, you'll survive.
Invest in a better bicycle.
Spend more time in the glow of the sun and moon, less in the glow of a CRT
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
When Mary Lou (real first name) talks you into driving to her house at lunch in high school and takes you up to her parents bed room and drags you onto the bed you do NOT get up and start playing the piano...
What an idiot!
That and sell the options. Ouch...
idealord music
1. Stay away from girls. All teenage girls can do is sap your time and energy. Wait until you're older and the women have their shit together.
2. Don't question authority. Teenagers, especially when in school, are rarely taken seriously and will just get into trouble when questioning authority. It isn't worth the bother, and will just waste time you could spend on something fun. Save the protests for when you are older, wiser, and can afford a lawyer.
3. Stay as far away from drugs as possible.
4. Learn your math. All of the other stuff you can learn in school is easy to pick up at any time in life. Getting the fundamentals of mathematics down when you are young and have the time will make learning many other things much, much easier.
5. Don't get a job. Teenagers will only be exploited at work. Live cheap, beg rides from friends, and use your time wisely. Don't waste your youth slaving away for a retail salary.
6. Get into a private school. Beg family, get scholarships, do whatever it takes, get yourself out of public schools and into a good one. Get a useful education, not the standardized crap the state provides.
TO 12 YEAR OLD SELF: I can tell you for a fact that you will live to see 20 years of age and be getting decent grades at a decent college. Go out and have some sex and do drugs or something.
12 YEAR OLD SELF: sweet....
I stressed about sex all through High School. I think If I was getting some I would have been more receptive to the advice "Just be yourself".
That and, "Don't worry about getting in trouble, Knock out the next guy who makes fun of your name. Show some back bone, life will be much easier."
I would tell him to start thinking about what to tell his 12 year old self when he was my age.
Surprised I haven't seen this one.
I would tell myself the winning lottery numbers to some mega huge jackpot.
I would tell myself that I would find the love of my life 3 years from then, and that to preserve my own sanity, I should find a way to save her from herself that didn't include breaking up with her 3 years after that. (it worked.. she's still alive... but I've lived a miserable time w/o her)
I would tell myself that if I continued hacking on Linux 0.98, instead of giving it up for more mature systems (OS/2), I could have a really kick ass job doing something in Linux, and use my current retail job to gain extra holiday income.. lol
I would tell myself NOT to abandon the killer software project that I was working on that would likely have been a LOT better than the WWW, simply beacuse Windows was the dominant operating system and Windows '95 didn't have the multi-threaded ness that it was promised to have brought in, which Linux and OS/2 had, and I wanted to go for a market share.
I would tell myself to find a better way to keep my best friend from joining the Air Force than just begging incessantly. Maybe shooting him in the foot or something.
"Champagne for my real friends - and real pain for my sham friends!" http://ericblade.postalboard.com/
"Read the book, Body For Life ASAP, and eat tons of protein.. In 6 years you'll be the star quarterback of the football team, instead of spending study hall crying in the bathroom."
It is too bad it took me until half way through college to really focus my passion in life. I've been with computers since i was 4 years old, but mostly until college I was a serious gamer and didn't have a clue as to how things actually worked. I would tell myself as a 12 year old, to keep reading the BASIC book i started and never finished. Take more math courses and try harder in them, read more books that are good for you not crappy science fiction.
in short I wish i'd just gotten seriously into computing earlier in life.
other than that...
do more drugs while you can't be convicted as an adult!
- "Never let a computer tell me shit." - DelTron Zero
-- @rjamestaylor on Ello
i would send my old p3 500 512 meg sdram with a 10 gig hd. and say: "Have Fun dude and learn c++ right now" (maybe with a slowdown software!)
Overuse of the Pumping Lemma causes blindness
I can message myself 20 years in the past! Weee! Weee! Oh, and give this message to a guy named Bill Gates who works for a company named Microsoft: "Linux Rulez, MS sux0rz!"
Watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow.
As good advice as any from Frank Zappa.
In walking, just walk. In sitting, just sit. Above all, don't wobble.
-- Yun-Men
your video game systems, your C-64 and drives or your Star Wars toys.
because nothing says "i kick ass" like a "skinny-head" Han Solo on top of a Vectrex and Racing Construction Set running on original equipment.
oh yeah, and don't be a wuss, go get contact leses sooner.
guns kill people like spoons make Rosie O'Donnell fat.
1) try pants
2) men in trenchcoats... not your friends
There are some odd things afoot now, in the Villa Straylight.
"If you ever go back in time, don't step on anything."
best web host ever
I like my life. Given various statics on jobs/money/education etc in this country I think I ended up in the better half.
Then again 74% of these statistics were made up.
1. Stop goofing off and take school seriously. Take college-prep track in high school with as many math courses as possible.
2. Do not take a break between high school and college.
3. Get a degree in engineering instead of computer science.
4. Get married and start making babies as soon as you have that first job out of college.
Now, in terms of practical advice, that's a whole other story. Buy Microsoft, always check the expiration date on all dairy products, and sell Microsoft in 1999 all come to mind.
Life is too important to be taken seriously - Oscar Wilde
My advice would be "Get the hell out of your bedroom, off of the damned computers, and go play some ball with the other neighbor's kids! You know you always wanted to, so, DO IT!"
Also, "Don't be afraid to ask out those cute girls, most of the time they're single because nobody has the balls to ask them out!" (Which I learned, unfortunately, senior year of high school!)
That, and also to avoid ever eating Chik-fil-A, which has started a dangerous, downhill obsession ever since my first bite....
Mmm, buttery bun... Mmmm, two immaculate pickles.... Mmmmm, plump, juicy fresh boneless chicken breast fried to perfection!
I could probably blame some of my excess baggage on chicken sandwiches and waffle fries...
-- Hey, what the hell, it's only slashdot..
....to go to a Community College......so at 16, dump high school and take tests at a local College and start prepping for a 2 year transfer to a University! Do it now, cause everything else is just gonna suck for way too long.....but even if you dont.....everything will work out one way or another.
Snippet 2: Career advisory service and ALL punditry you will hear at school on the subject of career choices will give you a bum steer if you are in the top 1% and listen to it. It is made up for the middle 90% who might actually find satisfaction in an environment with a clean-desk policy. I have never worn a tie to a job interview where I actually got the job. The interview process is as much a filter for you as it is for them. No, I tell a lie: I did it once and left the job on acrimonious terms in about 9 months. The shirt-tie-and-and-nice-cardy look just screams Goober with no self-confidence and will only be of interest people who want to employ you on those terms. Demonstrating self-confidence in your own intellect (as well as evidence of having it in the first place) is the best way of impressing a potential employer.
Snippet 3: Get used to hard problems as young as possible. If school doesn't provide them (as is more and more the case today), find somewhere else. This aspect of my upbringing alone significantly stunted my intellectual development until I finally went to university at 26.
All those books you hate because you _have_ to read them are actually pretty good when you _want_ to read them.
and kill it now. Those hours would have been better spent playing marbles or just about anything else. Hang out in the library more.
Friends don't help friends install M$ junk.
Don't drop the soap.... For God's sakes, don't drop the soap little Digi'... Don't drop the damn soap... It will render you senseless until the day you die!
Oh yea: Invest in stocks like Amazon, Yahoo, Apple, Sun, just pull out by the year 2000.
Oh - and also buy amazon stock when it goes public, but be sure to dump in after several months as it will drop like a rock down the road
i have to remember what i told my 12-year-old self:
never put salt in your eyes . . . never put salt in your eyes . . . never put salt in your eyes . . . never put salt in your eyes . . . put salt in your eyes . . . always put salt in your eyes . . . AAAAAUUUUUGH!!!!!!
(if you know what this is from then you are cool, and i'm sorry i can't remember quite how it goes)
track7.org has all kinds of interesting stuff!
Don't worry about the bullies. In the future, you'll be making more money than all of them combined. DJCC
...is 12-22-29-42-50,11
And you probably want to avoid the World Trade Center, the Pentagon, and any planes on 9/11/01.
-- Boycott Shell
Why bother even thinking about this problem? It could never happen based on the grandfathers paradox. There is no logic in asking this question. lets get a question thats at least logically possible...
take every chance you get to increase your karma through slashdot topics...esp. those ones where every comment gets a 5 of funny =]
Here are the outcomes of various sporting events and here is how to bet....
Here are a list of stocks....... bail by mid 2000 for God's sake!
Lottery numbers for the biggest jackpot I can find....
And of course.... Date the following people who you didn't think you could, and don't date the following people who you could.....
And lastly, write all this down and go back in time when you are older and tell yourself all this.
At least, that is what I have written in my notebook, damn me for not telling me how I'm supposed to do time travel, very important detail to omit here. Now I'll create a universe destroying paradox...
XML is like violence. If it doesn't solve the problem, use more.
The only thing I really wish I'd known when I was twelve is that Aikido has what I was looking for and didn't find in Karate classes. It has helped me build a strong body and spirit in the supportive and friendly environment that I really needed back then. (Not to mention that it would have been cool to lay waste to the jerks who picked on me in junior high. Oh wait, that's not the true spirit of Aikido...)
:)
And besides, if I'd started back then, I'd be shodan by now.
TTFN
Vote Libertarian.
1. Your dad is not a dope. Tell him that what you want more than anything in the world is to be able to spend more time with him. He will be dead before you are thirty and it will be too late.
2. You're not as smart as you think you are. Coasting through jr high/high school will make college a LOT harder. Learn how to learn now because you will need those skills the rest of your life, and largely your ability to earn a living is directly correlated to assimilation of technical information and people skills.
3. Most importantly, being a Christian is NOT about going to church or getting a "get out of hell free card." Jesus Christ wants you to serve Him with all of your heart, soul, mind, and strength.
Your current approach of "how much can I get away with and still go to heaven" doesn't work now, and won't work for the rest of your life.
Peace, contentment, and real/deep/meaningful relationships are found when your greatest desire is to please God and serve Him.
But Herr Heisenberg, how does the electron know when I'm looking?
Calm down, kid. Don't take everything so goddamned seriously. The vast majority of the people in the world are not out to get you.
1) Buy Microsoft stock. Even though they work on things like DOS they will be big.
2) Buy the Corona IBM compatible and not the Commodore 128. Don't listen to the guys on the BBS that say CPM is the future.
3) Choose football camp over computer camp. Seriously.
4) Keep your friends. Good, long lasting friends are hard to find. Especially that guy that goes onto to become a general contractor.
5) You know that system you saw during your trip to CompuServe? The one run by the government? Learn everything about it especially the protocols.
6) Wear the condom. Always.
7) Cherry vodka and jack daniels do not mix. Especially if you are going to jump on a trampoline after drinking them.
8) Ask her to the dance. Just do it.
9) You cannot get rich quick unless you heed rule number one.
10) Enjoy life. When you're in your thirties there are things you cannot do that you could do when you were a teenaged.
Go tell the police to watch for Arabs taking flying lessons in Florida and Arizona"
...and sell them in 1999.
I would tell myself that girls are more fun than computers and that I should change priorities.
:-)
Maybe some investment tips too
-- Make software not war
Sit still! Behave! Dammit, don't make me get the hose!
Emacs: for people who just never know when to
This is an easy one. You are going to meet a girl in your freshman english class that is the freakiest girl you'll ever meet. Stay with her longer than 2 weeks.
----
Squirrel
I know exactly what I would have told myself. I was a typical dorky tall skinny geek, and I barely ever made an attempt to try any sports.
The few times I did, I was pretty bad, and pretty self-consious but I DID get better. I could have easily played basketball or track, but I was too introverted to try....
If I had tried, I probably would have been in better physical shape, and met more people.
But who knows what else it might have changed? Being dorky and out of shape is what steered me from college to the military and subsequently my wife.
I would tell myself to not register slashdot.org as doing so would mean there is no slashdot to ask this question and thus I couldn't have made the initial change thus causing a paradox.
Oh... and stay away from the airport ( especially the guy with the blonde wig and sunglasses )
To: All students in RIT housing From: Resnet There are many ways that students can lose their network connection in the RIT Residence Halls and Apartments. Here are the most common: 1. Do you use DirectConnect, KaZaA, or other file-sharing programs to share copyright protected material (MP3, movies, games)? then you may lose your network connection because you have been turned in for copyright violations. ITS regularly receives reports of copyright violations from the Business Software Alliance, MediaForce, and even from your fellow students. Follow this link to learn how to disable your applications sharing feature: http://resnet.rit.edu/modules.php?name=News&file=a rticle&sid=99>
2. Do you have a computer or other device on the network that is not
registered for network access?
then you may lose your network connection for "stealing" an IP
address and preventing a
student who did register their computer from getting on the network.
All devices connected
to the Residential Network MUST BE REGISTERED.
3. Do you have a computer without a password or accounts on your
computer that do not have a password?
then you may lose your network connection because a "hacker" has
taken control of your system and is serving illegal material,
attacking other computers on campus, or consuming massive amounts
of RIT's bandwidth. Follow this link for tips
on securing your Windows computer:
http://resnet.rit.edu/modules.php?name=News&file=a rticle&sid=107>
and
http://resnet.rit.edu/modules.php?name=News&file=a rticle&sid=106>
4. Did you install the FREE Virus software available to all RIT
Students? No?
then you may lose your network connection because you are sending
viruses
to everyone in your address book.
Follow this link for FREE SOFTWARE:
http://www.rit.edu/~wwwits/services/security/>
5. Are you running a server on your computer that facilitates the
theft of copyright protected material or
Commercial Use of the RIT network?
Such as exams, solution guides, serial numbers, MP3's, Movies, Warez,
SPAM MailServer, etc.
then you may lose your network connection for violations of the
RIT Code of Conduct:
http://www.rit.edu/computerconduct/>
Residential Computing
1034 Nathaniel Rochester Hall
Rochester Institute of Technology
716.475.2600 voice
716.475.4927 tty
resnet@rit.edu
http://resnet.rit.edu/
http://www.rit.edu/~resnet/
besides the oblig. switch hands more often and that mom and dad know what running water means!!!, i'd say nothing. why? well, we are the sum of our experiences and even a small thing might mean huge changes.
i have two kids. and there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING IN THE WORLD i would do differently if it means not having my son and daughter. i am not trying to be sappy. i was offered several tecahing jobs right after i accepted my current job, chances for good coaching positions, etc., seven years ago. easily could've taken them, it was the summer, and all. no big deal, except i signed a contract, easy to get out of, but i'm not that sort of person. met my wife on the job, and we have two beautiful children.
who knows, maybe i say, look, do this or do that. maybe something inconsequential, but it matters. maybe i get into computers at 13 rather than 23, great. i am uber hacker, maybe!! maybe i am on linus' submitter list. great. am i don't have megan and nathan. no thanks. sorry, i suck, but it's true.
My problem? I was perfectly gruntled, until some numbnuts came by and dissed me.
1. You're OK. You don't have to tear other people down to try to make yourself feel better. You don't have to be an asshole.
2. You'll play football a lot better if you get contacts.
3. Personal hygiene matters more than you think. (Yeah, my mom tried to tell me...) So does fashion, for that matter.
2. Sleep with everything that moves, knowing that as you make more money, the women get prettier. If you dont like the girls who like you, make more money!
3. STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY! STUDY!
4. Under no circumstances ever consider marriage unless you reach 30 and make less than 150K a year. If you are younger and/or make more, your options for trim are too good to settle for just one chick regardless of what you look like.
5. Dont buy a Mac.
6. Just because you will love Java, doesn't mean you can ever do anything productive with it. Stick with C++ and dont be afraid of garbage collection and pointers.
7. Everyone you think is cool, will be washing your car, turning down your hotel bed, and bringing you meals in 20 years, if you refuse to be like them now.
8. Those big tits you love so much right now, will be hanging around her navel in 25 years. Learn to like the flat girls.
9. Once you make decent money, you will forget all that crap about the environment, compassion and helping others, so why waste your time now?
10. Everyone does it, anyone who says they dont is lying.
What would your future self (10 years from now) want to tell you? I'd wager that it boils down to what you would tell your 12 year-old self.
Have more fun be Happy! Be positive!
Be proactive and make things happen.
Make lots of Friends.
Go on adventures so you can tell cool stories.
Do what you love! It's not worth it to do anything else.
Take care of your body.
People expect to much of a year and not enough from a decade. - Neil Armstrong
I don't know, I'm only eleven.
(kidding)
The most intellegent thing I've ever heard on this topic was in "Tom the Dancing Bug" cartoon.
Coz by the time high school is over (1984), there's gonna be this incurable STD that KILLS. Wear a condom--just to be on the safe side.
something I would point out to my 12 year old self is that one girl who in class who was kind of quiet but still liked sports ends up looking super hot by the time shes 18
This is how you send messages back in time. Always remember this, and you can use this to make tons of money and fix any mistakes you may have made. If you don't like how things are going... send another message!
P.S. Keanu Reeves stays just as cool as he was in Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. Too bad the rest of us grew up...
pb Reply or e-mail; don't vaguely moderate.
Hey, you know all those girls who think they're hot shit right now? in four years, they'll all be skanky sluts who still think they're hot shit--treat them like the skanks they are and they'll be putty in your hands. They'll stay that way until they're about 25. Then you can be nice to girls again.
1. Patent all software concepts and make them public domain. 2. Create Linux. And since my last name is Lim, call it Limux. 3. Buy properties and sell them duringthe economic boom. 3. Create SlashDot, hire CowboyNeal, and remind him to do a post on "Giving advice to your 12 year old self" on February 21, 2003.
1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly n33d t0 g37 l41d
Go to college as soon as possible. It sucks much less than high school. And, oh yeah ... when you are offered that Job at Yahoo, TAKE IT!
1. Buy lots of stock in Qualcomm in 1999 for $50/share and sell it all in 2000 for $600/share.
2. Don't have sex with the weird chick with the really short hair.
3. DO have sex with the blonde that drives an Audi
4. Learn to do calculus before the calc midterm.
5. Don't drive through a certain intersection on May 4th 2001.
6. Get in lots of trouble with the cops before you turn 18 so that it stays on your juvenile record. Remember kids - after 18, it stays on your rap sheet for life.
I'd rather be a conservative nutjob than a liberal with no nuts and no job.
"Put 15-20% of every penny your earn in the bank"
Maybe so you you don't have to shave/cut your pennies and nickels, you could put 15-20% of every dollar you earn in the bank. I'd hate to deal with all those pennies...
You should SUE girl A for not breaking up with you sooner!
the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff
I'm married too, but Leykis is the man. I learned to rediscover my inner A-hole right quick.
Just remember, she has a psychotic overprotecive uncle with an axe.
goatse.cx .. Please young version of me, register that domain and save me from having an image imprinted on my mind forever.
...avoid bad whiskey and stick to premium brands.
Thanks Cerebus
I was so uncool when I was twelve, if I could go back in time I'd probably beat myself up...
Statistically speaking, there's a 99.998% chance that my IQ is higher than yours. Get over it.
May be you should STOP quitting whatever thing you do once you understand it. Sometimes, it pays to finish what you start... and dont worry being unemployed it's cool too!
P.S.: Could you also buy an almach with the lottery winning numbers BEFORE the 2003-02-01 and keep it ALWAYS with you, i dont know where i left mine and after all you never know if someone will ask you "Advice You Would Give to Your 12 Year-Old Self?".
-- search the web
Embrace your dorkdom because you will continue the rest of your life challenging a beautiful dork who greets you ever time you get home with a smile.
Don't smoke that whacky tabacy when your around 18/19 and quit your Kenpo Karate classes... Listen to this advice and you'll be a handsome, intellegent badass instead of wielding a spare tire around your waste and making it a pain in my ass to try and enjoy exercise...
Start earlier and buy some Legends and Arabian Nights boosters. Fallen Empires was the worst expansion for a new player to start in.
. . . you will get laid eventually.
Twelve was too late to change anything.
Ok, maybe not. But in truth, I look at where I got in life, and even though there were some awful years between 12 and 18, I think if I somehow dodged them then the great things that happened in the 12 years after that wouldn't have happened.
I would love to see an alternate universe where my teenage self made different decisions. I'd like to observe -- if I had done this differently, would a certain relationship have ended differently? Would I have done as well in school? Would I have made more friends, or diferent friends?
But, I hold no illusions that making those decisions would still leave me the person I am today. I find the idea of reversing them interesting in an intellectual sense, but I'd never ask my past self to do reverse them, for fear of losing the core of "me" that makes me everything I am today.
Not representing or approved by my company or anybody else.
Don't invest in VA.
(I'm sure CmdrTaco and ESR are wishing that.)
On the other hand, I suppose a 30 year old man taking a 12 year old boy into the corner to talk about orgasm generates its own awkward situations.
... are all full of shit. Don't put your faith in any of them, cuz none of them will be there for you when the shit hits the fan. Study the bible and other religious texts, start your own family, and get politically active, but make sure your faith is in God alone, and no other people/person.
Don't buy Kurt Saxon books, the guys a retard. Don't listen to Rush Limbaugh, he's full of shit. Don't work in the computer industry, because after 5 years in the industry, you'll lose your love of them and it will take you another 6 years of soul searching to find it again(although you still won't have found your love of gaming again).
Don't believe in any corp you work for, just do your job, keep your mouth shut, and be expecting them to try to screw you and everyone else who pours their lives into their mission. They don't give a damn about you, it doesn't matter what your charismatic CEOs have to say. You are nothing more than human fuel, and when they've gotten what they need from you, you will be discarded like human debris. No, it won't matter how good you are or how hard you work. Remember, ask for the sky, and while you won't get it, you'll do a lot better than asking them for what you think is fair, because they won't give you that if you do.
Show me an effect without cause and then I'll believe in chaos.
"Do not under-estimate the importance of the 'prestige' of the university you attend. I know you can get a good education at State-U but you are smart enough to get into an Ivy League school and it will vastly impact your earnings potential in later life."
I'd give my 12 year old self a cd set of gentoo linux. I could get my name changed to Linus. THEN I'd become very popular!
That would be a message to my NINE year old self, not my twelve year old self... thank goodness for all those weird friends I had who wanted to "mess around". Though the one that first showed me how to do it actually told me how to do it the wrong way. I didn't finally do it the normal way until a good year or two later.
Although I suppose training my left hand may have been a good idea about that time... the right one gets tired after awhile.
GET MARRIED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!!
Cause you ain't getting any Prettier!
Trust me, I am truly hideous.
BWAHAHAHAHA AHAHA AHAHAHAHA!
and vote for Nader!
the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff
To which 12yr old me would say:
What the hell does register mean, and what is slashdot.org?
33yroldme: It is a website
12yroldme: What the hell is a website?
33yroldme: You know the internet.
12yroldme: What the hell is the internet?
33yroldme: A bunch of computers hooked up together to share information.
12yroldme: What the hell is a computer?
33yroldme: You know, a personal computer.
12yroldme: No, I have no idea what you are talking about.
33yroldme: It is a screen, like a TV, and you can do all kinds of things on it, like playing games.
12yroldme: Oh, in your house, like an Atari?
33yroldme: Yeah, sort of, but they are all over the world too.
12yroldme: Oh, you mean in the arcade like a Pac-Man machine? And that new game, Pole Position? That game is cool. It is so realistic! Or Joust, that game is fun because two people can play at once. I have only played it a couple of times because it is brand new. There is always a line for it.
33yroldme: Dude, nevermind. Have fun.
My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.
And save yourslef some time by not falling for that Laurie chick. It'll never happen, no matter how nice a guy you think you are.
And what's even sadder, my 12-year-old self would listen. Sigh.
> back in the days when I was 12 years old, I went traveling during those summer-holidays, together with my brother(14) from the netherlands like going the UK. No parents or >20 years old around. Great vacations and a lot of experience then. And the feeling of this 12 years old person that is wondering around in a strange city and country and still can survive somehow, made me feel so much stronger. All about this coding/relationships/money/etc start that when you`re 15/16.
The information on how I managed to send a message to myself in the past. This way my 12 year old self can send a message to his 5 year old self, and create an endless loop up self improvement, creating the ultimate human being to rule all.... .. Excellent ...
..There's a-dooin's a-transpirin'
When you hit 18 years old, your metabolism will slow down. Lay off the bar-b-que corn chips and chocolate milk around that time, ok? And stop wearing baggy pants. Trust me, if you don't, you will gain 40 pounds by the time you are done college (and those pants will actually fit!).
Everyone seems to be obsessed with money. I'm more concerned about my health, so that's what I would say.
Robots are everywhere, and they eat old people's medicine for fuel.
You're 12 freaking years old-- You are *NOT* responsible for everything you think you're responsible. If someone tells you to grow up, tell them "fuck you, I'm still a kid"...
Because you blew years 3-11 acting as the man of the house, doesn't mean you can't have a childhood. Play games. Hang out with friends. Talk about dumb stuff. Watch those movies you know are just dumb, with friends, it's all worth it.
Public school doesn't count for shit. Graduate early.
You're right, just keep on keepin' on.
Fuck college. The classes are a joke, you won't learn anything, and thus, being bored, you'll end up becoming a Counterstrike/TFC/Day of Defeat addict, thereby ruining yer GPA.
.com (I'll name it not, but it's one of the few that's still in existance), take it, sell stock when it's high, and retire by the age of 25.
:P
A waste of money.
Thus, when your friend offers you the chance to move to CA and get hired by a
*snort* Oh, those lovely people who insisted on degrees back in the day. Would that I weren't suckered in by their rational thought.
Nowadays, a degree and $1.00 will get you a cup of coffee and some very stiff toilet paper.
Flip answers - lotto numbers, stock advice. Oh, and regardless of the trend, do not wear those rainbow suspenders. (Braces, to you UK types)
Serious answers - ask the girls out - rejection is never as bad as you think, and after you get used to it, you can ask anyone out.
- exercise more
- compliment the girls more
Mom is right. You will miss her when she's gone.
...when you're studying Operating Systems by Tannenbaum and feel the itch to make an OS based on Minix, do it. Don't give up.
Don't brag to anyone when you get the administrative password to your school.
You're a nerd. There's not a damn thing you can do about it. I'll, err.. 'we'll' take care of Marc Jones later. Don't worry.
Yes, those coaches really are what they seem.
Sorry, no sex for at least another 16 years, start learning Russian now.
Don't touch that damn neon transformer.
Hold your breath until mom&dad buy you, err.. 'us' the following:
(insert all winning lotto numbers for FL here)
msft
wallstreet.com, sex.com domain registrations. You don't know what a domain name is right now. Find out.
I had a sucky sig.
Start smoking now... you're gonna do it in college anyway, you might as well be a cool kid now! And buy a whole bunch of cigarettes now because someday they're gonna be $5.50/pack! Oh, and don't sign up for cross-country. Especially if you're gonna smoke.
I really hate signatures, but go to my website.
Of course, I'd say "buy microsoft, and sell it before 2000; same with AOL; buy RedHat and sell early." Having money is better than poverty.
After telling myself that engineering would be a waste of time, especially since I'm going to get rich on the stock market, I'd tell myself that in 20 years there would be lots of really cool Japanese stuff available in America, and if I don't take a Japanese major, I'd have to depend on ROM hackers, scanslators, and fansub groups, which would suck.
But most importantly, I'd tell myself that in college and beyond, I would have a few opportunities to trust people. DON'T! I'd tell myself to remember that everyone is an enemy and give myself a list of names of people to not even talk to.
If you wait for the right time for everything, you'll spend your whole life waiting.
You should sue your parents!
Dad hides those magazines under a loose floorboard in the closet, not under the bed where you keep looking *just in case*.
While you're at it, hang on to the Battlestar Galactica ones, too. That Ceylon Raider that actually fires the missiles will one day be extremely rare. And that Land Rover, too.
Other than that, just carry on.
"You cannot simultaneously prevent and prepare for war." -- Albert Einstein
Two words. "Hit It". Seriously, would have made my high school and college years much more fun and carefree :).
buy some now
The more you want, the less you have.
And, of course, take a sports almanac.
Nail as many women as possible because you don't get the young pootang for long.
...And when they came for me, there was no one left to speak out for me." - Martin Niemoeller (1892-1984)
...I'd finally know what it's like to give MYSELF oral sex!! And anal sex... and so forth..
Enjoy your life, don't doubt yourself, Things are better then you think, and choose a school closer to home.
GTA3 is like the Sims to me - MC Hawking
about this internet thingy... now...
1> Start a site, call it slashdot, post repetitive stories about the same thing over and over again... people will bitch, but they'll keep coming back
2> Start another site, call it yahoo, offer a bunch of stuff for free, and have a huge index of all the other cool sites that you thought of first...
3> register business.com
4> buy aol stock... that little bbs out of virginia has something with those fancy graphics and all...
5> Don't marry that first chick...
Snooze and you lose your sushi.
actually, better advice for me would be "smoking all that pot will make you very stupid"
The advice I'd give is advice I actually got from our church minister (yes, I know that's pathetic) when I was 12: it's wonderful when you are different, but you don't have try to be even more different just to get attention.
To that, I'd add not to act as if things you're not good at (like sports) are less important than things you are good at.
You won't go blind. Let 'er rip.
Also, you'll come upon a question on a test that will knock you on your head. You'll know it when you see it. The answer is "Steve Ballmer's sweat".
..I wasn't nerdy or unpopular at 12. Which is more than I can say 17 years later. Sheesh...it all went wrong when i discovered C++...
Sure, the further back you go, the more drastic an intervention might be, but all I really needed at 12 was some encouragement and a boost to my self esteem. If I could really go back and give myself advice, I'd aim more for myself at 18 or 19-- my career choices, my relationships-- those were truly pivotal years and I'd give myself an earful. Come to think of it, there are things I did yesterday that I wish I'd listened to that inner voice of mine (surely my 50-year-old self sending brain waves from the future).
Oh, and take the red pill..
So long, and thanks for all the Phish
...some of this may not make sense, but trust me. I'm older and wiser than you.
At age 15: Yeah, we suck at foreign languages, big-time. If you can just get through 3 years of Spanish with C's, it'll all be fine.
At age 16: Brush your teeth and stop drinking all those sodas. I'm dead serious. Don't make that face at me, young man.
At age 17: Yes, you've just learned an important lesson -- you can be a real asshole sometimes.
At age 19: That girl in the bookstore, flirting with you? Run. Run like the wind and never look back.
At age 22: Oh, for the love of Jebus, apply to more than 7 grad schools!
At age 24: Don't drift apart from Meg just because you're both busy. She's one of the good ones; the kind worth keeping.
At age 26: Dude, it looks bad now, but things will get better within two years. Just hang on.
Sincerely,
Yourself
Convice mom and dad to put their loan money
in microsoft stocks.
Do *NOT* go to college. It was really pointless because a president gets installed right as you finish college who proceeds to ruin the economy. This so called great degree doesn't help you get a job, the degree would be better served as toilet paper in the new century. Go to work for a dot com company and keep selling off those options. Put that money into a mutual fund until the year 2000, at that point sell it off and put that money in a good old savings account. I have no advice for high school, that was fine. It was boring but worked out just fine. I can't advise you on women because I still haven't figured them out.
Visit www.seriouslythough.com
If past me saw me, he would know that the only reason I would go back in time was to kill him. So his natural reaction would be to kill me first. So I'd probably tell him not to kill me... then I'd kill him. Damn bastard, he ate all my cheese.
"Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil." -Philips
Get yourself a decent haircut
Shag that bird when you are 15
Go out more
Take that job you get offered when you are 17
and wait for the profits!! or dontt confess to: xxx girl, xx girl, xxx girl, xxxx girl, get condoms and start programming!
i have found, you can find,happiness in slavery!
Apple too, while you're at it (at least until the early 90s).
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein
Dear self,
On March 30, 1981, a man named John Hinckley will assassinate President Reagan as he leaves the Washington Hilton Hotel in Washington, D.C.
It's up to you to stop him.
I'd tell my 12 year old self, that it's very important to remember - everybody is a little fucked up one way or another, even if they seem perfect in every way. There's always something thats a problem to someone - and not to worry if you have some seemingly big problem, somebody somewhere has a bigger one than you.
Derive from this that you should NEVER never feel that you're lower than someone else in any way.
Everyone has issues.
Simple life philosophy: Problems happen. Deal with it, head on even. Keep moving.
Oh,and never take yourself too seriously.
No matter how interested you become in linguistics while in college, drop it after college and don't waste our money on grad school. We'll be much better off if you spend those two years earning income rather than accumulating debt.
Oh, one more thing, out down that damn cigarette! I'm going broke feeding that habit now.
I'd be tempted to say "Don't go to Penn State" but that will still be six years off and I would forget by then anyway. Plus I met all my friends there.
Jon Acheson
All opinions expressed herein are my own, and not those of my employers, who are appalled.
Stop masturbating so much. In a few years there will be unlimited porn available - just remember to tell you parents you need a 'high speed connection' to thin thing we call the "Internet"
When the bitch says, "I can't use birth control, and I don't like condems." just walk away boy, just walk away. She WILL get pregnant, you then leave you, and then you will pay child support for 18 years.
Learn from this: in 20 years from right now, what advice do you think you would want to go back and give to your "now" (current age) self? "Stop buying so much stuff." "Get married already." "Start saving money for the future!" "Stop smoking." "Eat better." "Get some exercise." "Sell your Microsoft stock!"
Is there advice that you get from your elders now that you're ignoring because it sounds suspiciously lame?
_______
2B1ASK1
dear 12-year-old self, know how everyone says your extremely fast metabolism will one day wear out, and how you thought they said that just cause they were jealous?
THEY'RE RIGHT, BEWARE OF CHEESESTEAKS AND COLLEGE.
I think it would be difficult to post something here that hasn't already been covered... but here goes:
First, I would be leary of breaking the temporal prime directive... I am who I am now because of my sufferings in the past. I have a wonderful girlfriend, a good job, am in college, don't feel the need to drink or do drugs, have very few health problems, haven't suffered many deaths or losses/etc. Overall, I'm pretty happy with the outcome so far.
If I could be sure somehow that I wouldn't ruin everything, I would probably try to convince myself to eat better.
I would tell myself that there are no easy answers, and the only way to get out from under a pile of shit is to start digging - procrastinating just makes it smell worse.
While I find myself always thinking "if only I'd known _this_ or done _that_ I could have slept with or not screwed it up... but I'm pretty sure sharing that info would ruin what I have now.
Finally, my biggest advice: The computer industry isn't going to turn out how it seems. Sure, stick to it but keep your options open - follow physics as well, or some other engineering field
I'd also give some higene advice... sometimes ya just need a slap in the face to make you realize some stuff, maybe it would be better welcomed coming from yourself
no comment
Self, someday you will meet a man who calls himself "Mucko". Have him drawn and quartered asap.
Oh, and on Sept. 11 2001, pull as many fire-alarms in the WTC in NewYork as you can before 10:00AM.
"Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge"
- Charles Darwin
I would tell my 12 year old self to register for a slashdot ID as soon as possible, so when they switch on UID displays you could look really l33t. Yep.
Yup.. when I was 12, the old guy across the street that would let me come over and build model airplanes with him died. Some relatives cleaned out the garage. I went over to the heap of garbage on the curb and took out a plane and some boxes of MAD magazine. There I was, sitting on the porch in my Atari t-shirt (which I wish I still had) reading the MAD magazines... they were so funny! I thought it was especially cool since they were all in good shape and from the 50's, 60's and 70's!
Well, it was no time at all for my mom to see them and sneak that 'filth' into the trashcan.... gone forever. I would have loved to be able to have read all of them before she did that... and I would be curious what the auction price for that collection would have been.... Oh, well.
Hobbies:
When you get to college, listen to Monk, Miles, Sarah Vaughn, Joe Williams, and Clifford Brown. Find a jazz trio and sing with them non-stop.
Work:
Take more computer classes in college. Try to learn C before all that beer kills your brain cells.
Forget about biology grad school. It wasn't worth it.
When someone mentions SGML to you in 1990, you should say "I'd like to learn more about that".
When you move to Chicago, you should try to become a fireman.
Love:
You should be more outgoing with cute girls in High School. You were not as goofy as you thought you were.
Breaking up with Carole in college was an extremely dumb idea.
Do not go to Europe with Kathleen.
That woman with the faux leopard skin shoes is the love of your life. Do not f*** it up.
My father is a blogger.
to New Mexico, stay in Vermont while looking to find a place to settle down. Also, sell your land in New Mexico long before dubya takes office.
read more.
At age 12 you didn't know what a computer was? Are you sure you're on the right site? This is "News for Nerds". :)
I do not have a signature
That's the reason why most time travellers get caught.
the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff
...south through the woods. The cops come in from the north. Good luck.
However, if Martha Stewart would have used that excuse instead of "I told my broker and he wrote it on a napkin", maybe she would have been ignored.
Although who knows. Everyone loves it when a bitch gets it in the end.
I'd say:
"You smart ass little 12 year old shit, you think you know everything. You know jack shit!"
I would tell myself not to look at $$$$$exyGal's journal at work!
Geez, that could have gotten me fired.
My advice? Get all the sex you can while you can get some easily. It's much easier to pick when you're 12 than when you're 40...
Forget Pascal learn C.
I'd actually gone there less than 3 weeks before 9/11 with my g/f. And umm, advice so that I stay somewhat on-topic, uh, travel when you can, it's better than shunning it for time on a computer.
This has been a test. Had this been a real emergency, we would have fled in terror and you would not have been informed.
Low self-esteem? Learn some self-defense. A little athleticism and a little self-confidence will do wonderful things.
Music school? What the fuck are you thinking?
Skip the math and physics classes, because you don't want to be an engineer.
Don't go to college, considering how you're not the type to party, it'll rip away all the creativity from your mind and happyness from your heart, and replace it with uniformity, bitterness, and hatred. You've learned more on your own, that's how you learn, that's how you'll always learn.
And dangit, go to an art school if you simply MUST go to college.
Listen to yourself, you're incredibly mature for your age.
And avoid vivianne, she's evil.
"Hey, kid: you know that inexplicable and unsubstantiated conviction you have in your bones that school is a pointless atrocity and your parents only care whether you live or die on the basis of whether it makes them look bad to the neighbors?
Well, you're right.
You need to get out of your school, your family and your neighborhood. Here's how to go about doing that.
You need to find some residental educational program far away. "Residental" here is a power word, with which "to conjure with". (1a. Find a piece of paper and carry it with you at all time. Write powerful useful words on it so you won't forget them.) To find such a residental program, you are going to need to do some research at the Library. The one downtown.
Basically "residental educaitonal program" means "boarding school" -- but there might be some useful leads out there which aren't really schools or which don't call themselves schools. Apprenticeship programs, perhaps.
If you don't know where to start, go to the reference librarian and tell her that you are doing a report for school on boarding schools, and ask how she might recommend you search for information. Be sure to tell her you're interested in finding out what programs currently exist, because you're supposed to write letters to them to ask them questions.
Do tons of research. Find a program which sounds good. Small schools are good. Avoid places which bill themselves as "academic" in theme or focus, because at the time you are searching that was the buzz-word schools which didn't have any focus at all used to justify their existence. Schools which specialize in science, engineering (which you will love), music, the arts, philosophy, and/or rhetoric are good bets for you. Most trade schools and military academies however are not so good. That said, it is better that you get into *any* program, rather than stay put. Do not worry about the cost.
Make a list of your top five choices. I trust you have kept all this secret. For the next step to work you must never let on that there are alternatives which please you almost as well. It is only if the next step fails utterly -- or some force invites you to negotiate -- that maybe you reveal that.
Go to your father. He's the one with the big bucks, and the loser in the custody battle. "Confide" in him that your bestest dream is to go to that program you picked, but that you're sure your mother would never ever let you attend a residental program, and that she would be so upset by the idea of you leaving, that you don't even dare bring it up with her.
Then, go to your mother. Ideally before your father gets to her, but not necessarily. Ask her if she had ever lived away from her parents to go to school. You will have piqued her interest, and she'll ask you why you ask. "Admit" as if reluctant to say so, that you're interested in the idea of boarding schools.
In both situations, it is *imperative* that you never EVER explain why -- neither true nor false reasons. Any reason you give can be argued with, quibbled with. Just keep maintaining, when they ask you why you are interested, why you want to go, "I don't know, it just seems really cool to me." They can't argue with that, and won't try.
They won't cave immediately. You're going to have to bring it up about every 15 days. I recommend keeping a calender and tracking how often you bring up the topic with each of them. (Tell your mom you want the calendar for recording friends' birthdays.) Don't pick the same day each week or every other week; too obvious. 15 days is good.
You may have to keep it up for a year or two. But unlikely even that long. Eventually your father will bring you the brochures of some school which is not residental, or otherwise a "compromise". If it's not what you want, say "it's nice, but the program I want to go to is...." He is impressed by people who stick to their guns. Remember, that's how you got the loft.
Eventually, he will probably take you on a trip to the program of your choice, for a tour. Be sure when you are in an interview situation, especially if you feel you are getting weepy, that you ask to speak to the interviewer without your father present. It's OK to burst into tears -- so long as you flat out say "I'm so scared you won't take me, and I want to go here so much!" Tell them it's your dream (they like hearing that).
Good luck, and enjoy your new life."
"P.S. Don't look back."
-*- Any technology indistinguishable from magic is insufficiently advanced -*-
$_='while(read+STDIN,$_,2048){$a=29;$b=73;$c=142;$ t=255;@t=map{$_%16or$t^=$c^=( $m=(11,10,116,100,11,122,20,100)[$_/16%8])$t^=(72, @z=(64,72,$a^=12*($_%16 -2?0:$m&17)),$b^=$_%64?12:0,@z)[$_%8]}(16..271);if ((@a=unx"C*",$_)[20]&48){$h =5;$_=unxb24,join"",@b=map{xB8,unxb8,chr($_^$a[--$ h+84])}@ARGV;s/...$/1$&/;$ d=unxV,xb25,$_;$e=256|(ord$b[4])9|ord$b[3];$d=$d8^ ($f=$t&($d12^$d4^ $d^$d/8))17,$e=$e8^($t&($g=($q=$e14&7^$e)^$q*8^$q6 ))9,$_=$t[$_]^ (($h=8)+=$f+(~$g&$t))for@a[128..$#a]}print+x"C*",@ a}';s/x/pack+/g;eval
"Win treats sysadmins better than users. Mac treats users better than sysadmins. Linux treats everyone like sysadmins."
telling myself to invent collectible card games? Or at least to buy loads and loads of Magic the Gathering cards (Alpha and Beta decks particularly). Decks going for $20 a piece....yum. No I don't play, but I kicked myself for not buying when I had the chance.
I thought this was a Jon Katz article, and we'd all be subjected to more misty-eyed Hellmouth sob-stories.
Whew.
...because when you tell someone you are a 34 year old virgin, they tend to laugh. :-(
I'm going to get drunk now.
....what makes you think that your future self (50 years from now) isn't trying to send you a message right now? Are you even listening? Could you guess what it might be?
You're going to live to at least 23...
Th
Then, when I become a few years older (graduated high school in 1978), I'd market these products agressively.
Best Buy can have you arrested
pics?
Fuck karma.
Let's see. Going back in time to give myself advise. I have three words for you.
SLOW
NEWS
DAY
"Population 1,656"
computer engineering is a great major, and will lead you to some exciting jobs. However, you need to isntead major in fashion design, which will lead you to a lot of puntang. This, in the end, is all that matters.
~ now you know
I don't know what to tell my 12 year old self... This guy came up to me when I was 12 and said he had something to tell me, but forgot what it was. I'll probably just tell him that.
"Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil." -Philips
Pull out that .com stock money in about...oh 1998!
Hang in there through high school, college is much better.
Forget the journalism degree--go for computer science. P.S. get a math tutor NOW!
In high school, be sure and make notes about the people you like and hate in your yearbook. If they were jerks then, they'll probably be jerks later. Maybe this will keep you from marrying the one you meet at your 10 year reunion!
If you've never been modded as "flamebait" or "troll," you've never tried to argue a minority viewpoint here!
Register business.com and you will make 8 million dollars selling it to a .bomb company!!!!
Oh... and Pie Bill Gates on national TV and you will be a celebrity!! haha
Mike @ The Geek Pub. Let's Make Stuff!
The girl in HS who kept visiting you and you couldn't figure out why...she wanted to fuck you.
The girls who were making out and you chose to just fuck one of them...you should have done them at the same time and made them do some crazy lesbian shit.
The girl who you considered your best friend...she wanted to fuck you, but you were too much of an idiot
The girl in German class with the tongue piercing and huge boobs...should have slipper her the sausage. What were you thinking???
You're going to marry a wonderful woman when you're 27, but for god's sake, fuck those chicks!!!!
"It's a tarp!" -- Dyslexic Admiral Ackbar
What do you think you'd like your future self to tell you now?
Unable to read configuration file '/bigassraid/htdig//conf/14229.conf'
Geocrawler error message.
Hey asshead, this guy was 12 in 1982. The only people who had computers in 82 were rich geeky college kids and big companies. Just because you were 12 in 1998 doesn't mean everyone was.
-B
i just keep telling myself, the older i get, the closer i am to moving at the speed of light.
Your foot, sebastian "seb the asshole" coover's
balls, kick him really really hard, I mean
AS HARD AS YOU CAN, and do it right
around 3rd period..... oh yea..... and then run....
Trust me, youll never be picked on again....
--Idiots, Every single one of YOU, A flaming mass of conglomerated morons, hey wait a second, isnt that how RAID works?
1. Dont take life seriously. No one gets out of it alive. 2. Live this life to the fullest. It isnt a dress rehearsal.
If I could send a message back to my nieve 12-yearold self I would first send much information about why Microsoft is evil. I would tell myself to start researching Unix and try to find and meet people like Linux Trovalds and R.M.S.
I have been interested in programming for a long time, since before I was 12. However, in my early days I was totally ignorant and thought Microsoft was the best thing in the world (I always wished I could see the code for MS-DOS and Windows, I had been brain-washed into thinking that it was normal and acceptable for a company like Microsoft to hide all their source code).
I would also tell myself to research and start using Unix so that when Linux came around I'd be more prepared.
Also, I would tell myself to invest in Red Hat when they came out and probably IBM too.
Girls want sex as much as guys do.
Purchase a baseball bat and take out your french teacher... yep, you know which one. I would have been out of jail by now.
The only thing that limits your possibilities is you.
Well, they're going to college too, on sports "scholarships". Get used to the idea now and when you get there you can skip the disappointment phase and enjoy your freshman year a lot more.
If you do that you'll discover that college professors ( at least the good ones) aren't authority figures. They're actually *teachers,* and are quite willing to be your friend as well. Even when things get rocky. Find the good ones and cultivate them.
You aren't really socially inept. You've matured early. This puts you about 20 to 30 years ahead of the curve. When you hit 40 or so people will suddenly think you're "cool" not because of any change in you, but because they've finally caught up. So don't sweat not fitting in with people who are, essentially, still savages.
KFG
send a message to yourself in the past by the time you reach a certain age (i.e. 24).
1. Avoid Christianity and religion in general. You'll waste a lot of time over the next 10 years trying to resolve doctrinal and traditional conflicts in Christianity. Remember how stupid you felt at 7 when you caught your parents putting presents under the tree and realized that you should have put all of the clues about Santa Clause together much sooner? Ditto on Christianity, religion, belief in God, and belief in the paranormal. It's all total crap that people believe because they want to. Learn about more about science and skepticism as soon as you can. They'll be the rocks that you can depend upon to tell you about the nature of reality after the illusion of God fades away.
:)
2. Avoid television and video games. You'll look back at the time you spent on them, and not really feel like you have anything to show for it. Play basketball, tennis, racquetball, etc. instead for recreation. Better yet, get started in flying remote control airplanes... what a kick!
3. Develop the software you want to, and go for it all the way. Do it by yourself, the way you want to, and never lose control of your pet projects until they've matured. Doing so will cost you big time.
4. Wait until you're at least 35 or so to get married, and don't do it at all unless it feels completely right. Don't get married because your friends are all married, or because some girl loves you, or because you're horny. Lots of your friends will be divorced before too much time, and it takes a lot more than that initial love to keep a marriage going. Don't marry a woman because she loves you. Marry her because you respect her completely, and she completes you. As for being horny: Hookers are much cheaper in the long run.
5. Travel travel travel. Learn new languages and new cultures. By the same token, don't be afraid to pack up all your crap and move to another part of the country or even the world. As you grow older, you'll treasure the things that you've learned about different people and different places.
Why are you letting these clowns ruin our country?
Oh, and practice more soccer during the summer and go to Neosho County Community College to play, your not goin to miss anything important in those 2 years.
I do security
...don't buy Beta.
I was going to put a sig here, but I had already submitted the message.
Know how your thinking of killing yourself? Please do me a favor and go ahead. Try something quick like jumping off a tall building or take some sleeping pills, borrow the car, a hose and some blankets and go park in the field near the airport. It'll save me a lot of pain, time, aggrevation, and bullshit. (Oh, and give up all hope you ever had on getting laid, graduating college, having a decent job, or becomming anything other than a computer programmer fanboy wannabe.) Trust me, you think it's bad now? It only gets worse.
1. invest...(stock) sell...(stock) ... ... ...
2. get a job when you start college you will be better off.
3.
4.
5.
6. when you get the opportunity to send your 12 year old self a message send this!
...But do not fear, later you will be their chief.
C. Sagan : A demon haunted world:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0345409469/
visit randi.org
I'm suprised I didn't see anybody post "Don't start smoking cigarettes dumbass". That's the biggest regret I carry forward with me from my teenaged years. In fact, it might be the only regret I still carry. It's certainly the only mistake that I'm still significantly effected by.
Plus, there's always the greatest sports movie ever!
Stop by my site where I write about ERP systems & more
Get into therapy.
lardass
Patent Everything
"Probably the toughest time in anyone's life is when you have to murder a loved one because they're the devil." -Philips
Tiffany has a crush on you too!
I AM, therefore I THINK!
If I'd've told my twelve-year-old self my 29-year-old self's mantra for dealing with other people, be they cow-orkers, other students, instructors, authority figures:
"There's an easy way to do things and a hard way to do things. Someone else usually gets to choose which way, my job is to make it more so for him than it is for me."
-JDF
don't drop out of college to get married at 19 don't get married again at 23 don't get married at all. be gay if you have to. just don't get married until you're old and boring.
Oh, and some clear and concise advice about women, of course...
"Research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing." -- Wernher von Braun
In 10 years you're going to graduate from college. Assuming that you still pretty much refuse to practice the oboe, you're gonna be a CS Engineer.
Do yourself a favor. It's 1997. Put off grad school, and move to California for two years. Maybe three.
Then go to grad school, but skip the Ph.D, and get your Masters. You're going to wind up bailing anyway.
don't worry, it's going to be HUGE!!!!
~ now you know
I would have brought myself a sports almanac, and told myself to bet on these teams. By the time I would have gotten to where I am now, I'd be rich!
Oh yeah, I'd also tell myself that if some pesky kid came along to try to stop me, bust a cap in his ass!
-- I am. Therefore, I think!
Hey dude,
You know that error you have in your text game you've been puzzling over? The problem is
2500 POKE 49152,34
should be
2500 POKE 49152,31
Hope that helps!
Me
Lift weights!!!!! I started weight lifting in college, if I had started when I was skinny and that young, I would have actual muscles!!!! Oh, and ask that girl michelle out who you will meet in the next 3 years...she will go out with you!!!
Programming is simply the application of logic to creativity
Pussy you don't ask for is pussy you don't get
Start lifting weights now, you scrawny shrimp. You'll be fat later. And try out for football
Don't smoke. You don't look cool doing it. It will make you miserable in the end
Study. Try to make good grades. It really is important
The rich girls aren't harder to get along with than the poor ones. So go after them
If you aren't part of the solution, there is good money to be made prolonging the problem
Just for your information. My parents are both public school teachers, meaning they make nearly nothing (they're nearing retirement now, and I make about as much as either of them with the same education but 25+ years less experience).
My parents bought the first family computer in '82, I was 9.
Also, Apple was all over the news with these incredibly new "home computers." If you were 12, American and didn't know what a computer was, you had other problems.
Keep that BBS running, by the time your 18 you can have your own ISP! then buy some Cisco, Intel, & Microsoft Stock...and would it kill you to start saving for a car now? That '84 Fiero sucked ass! By the way: Fridays lotto numbers will be....
Blue pill! ...wait no! ... Which one was it!!? aww crap... take all the pills you're bound to find the right one sometime.
"no one knows how to fill in the void called america" --the discovery channel
No matter who you meet, or how you feel about that person do not get married until you are over 30.
Don't let anyone prevent you from doing the things you have an affinity for.
Do alot of traveling.
Learn to fly.
Buy Microsoft stock.
go and find yahoo.com & ebay.com and give them all your money in return for stocks! Do it now you little red-headed punk... Just sit on them don't ever sell them or rather when you are me then you err.. I will sell them.
Get a decent haircut so girls will be more attracted to you. Grow your hair out longer, earlier.
I don't necessarily recommend anyone else skip classes, but I'm an autodidact and it would have saved me a lot of time.
Take the time to read. It's well worth the effort.
Stop by my site where I write about ERP systems & more
Stop being such a fucking nice guy to these girls. They all WANT nice guys, but they have sex with assholes. Learn this and have fun in High School!
I'd probably tell myself how Jesus died for my sins... that it is through faith alone that I can have eternal life through Christ. But that's just me... I wish I had made that decision a lot sooner.
(pre-flame disclaimer)
Yes I am serious, no I'm not going to respond to negativeness about this because it's what I would have told me and arguing on the internet won't get us anywhere anyhow.
You've watched Back to the Future a few too many times.
Aside from the lottery numbers, I'd probably say
I know you're hungry, I know you're drunk, and I know it smells appetising, but seriously, you don't want to eat the cat food... Oh, and go drag your buddy back inside, he wandered out into the street and passed out while you were MICROWAVING A BOWL OF CAT FOOD.
Come to think of it, can I give me a slap too?
Tell your mom to have the blood tested before she has her second hip replacement so they find the hepatitus C before they give it to her and not 10 years after the fact.
~~ Behold the flying cow with a rail gun! ~~
- Junior High and High School are going to suck. But just keep reminding yourself it will be over eventually. And college will be a lot more fun.
- By the way, you do in fact have what it takes to succeed in college. In fact, you'll have more fun if you actually pick a very competitive school. Just because most of the people in our high school aren't even going to college doesn't mean you shouldn't.
- Stick with math. I know your math teachers will be uniquely awful in all the world, but you will benefit greatly from developing some serious algebra, trig, and calculus skills. At some point, you will pretty much abandon math because of the abysmally poor teaching available to you. Don't; teach yourself.
- Getting laid by the time you're sixteen should not really be your primary goal at the present time. It won't do anything for your future to get some girl pregnant. Constant masturbation does not make you a loser at the present time. Obsessing mournfully about not getting laid, however, does.
- Start working now on skipping a grade or two, particularly your senior year in high school. Some smart people with smart parents are able to do that. Just a thought. You could save yourself a considerable amount of boredom.
- Save that twenty-page poem you wrote. Save copies of everything you write. Your thirty-five-year-old self wants to read them. It's OK that they aren't that good.
- Get some exercise. I know gym class has almost soured you on physical acivity for life, but you're going to regret not developing some exercise habits doing solo or non-competitive things that you actually like, such as biking hiking, and weightlifting.
- Lay off the high-fructose corn syrup and hydrogenated fats. One day we'll realize that putting these in just about every food item available was in fact a bad idea.
- It's really true -- none of the adults in your life do know quite what to do with you. Your parents don't know what to do with you, your teachers doen't know what to do with you, and no one is giving you much in the way of support or valuable advice for how to prepare for your future. Here are some additional miscellaneous tips:
- get more sleep. you can finish that book in a day or two.
- don't put so much effort into your part-time job. you're not getting any real benefits from working at a grocery store 35 hours a week while in high school.
- keep writing. in fact, write more.
- work on developing some actual social skills. these will prove to be far more valuable in college than the brains; sheer brains you've got covered.
- most of the biggest mistakes in your life up until the age of 35 will revolve around a lack of social maturity and self-confidence. work on that confidence thing.
- be careful: Jimmy Northrop and Edwin are both not going to be good friends; they are, in fact, both going to beat you up.
- give up the church youth groups and camps. these poor experiences with small-minded, bigoted people will sour you on spirituality and religion for the next twenty years. follow the spirituality and religious traditions that actually mean something to you.
- those chicks you'll be lusting after at the age of 19 are actually a deeply disturbed woman who will not age well at all. her problems are far beyond your ability to help with, so don't get sucked in. you deserve to date someone who is NOT psychotic once in a while. weird is OK... psychotic is not.
Last, but not least:
- hey, you at 35 doesn't suck. you're not obsese, you're good-looking, you've had some great relationships, you've got a great family, and you've done some great work. What does this imply about you at 12? Duh... think about it...
If you invest money instead of paying it to go to college, you'll make more money in the long run.
Also you'll learn more about programing, and prolly make quite a few dollars there too.
God spoke to me
You'll place a bet with her 5 years from now. If you're alive and you're both single by 33, you'll get married.
Scrap that. Make it 25 otherwise you'll lose contact forever...
/. Where the truth
Just do it until you needs coke bottles!
My advice to my twelve year old self would be to masturbate all you want. It won't make you blind.
With Peek and Poke you can do something more than unlimited lives
-If its got wheels or tits, is all just trouble (except below); ignore both, play w/the TRS-80 instead
-Get a 486 & do it now!
-n=+1
-Exchange students are worth it; work on your Japanese and/or Finnish
"Good, bad, I'm the guy with the gun."
Learn to love who you are.
If you are comfortable with yourself then you can be comfortable with other people.
Treat yourself and others with respect.
If you are comfortable with other people they will realize that you have it together and they will treat you with respect. People pick up easily on how others expect them to act... if you expect people to treat you with respect, chances are they will.
Those that lose your respect, ignore. Not in the sense that you pretend they don't exist, just don't waste energy dealing with them. You have much better things to do with your time than be mad at other people. It usually doesn't accomplish anything except to raise your blood pressure and give you ulcers and heart attacks.
Angry people are too focused on what is wrong and miss out on many things that are good. Don't be angry. If you need to work out some agression then get some exercise and think happy thoughts.
If you make someones day better there is a good chance that they will make somebody elses day better and the world will get better bit by bit. If you go around making other people's days worse then eventually the whole world will be filled with angry people.
One person can make a difference.
42 - So long and thanks for all the fish.
In a few years on DO NOT stop off to get gas on your way to 's house. You'll get there about 5 min to late.....and you'll blame yourself for her death for a LONG time........
Don't wait until you're too old. Take chances. Dream big. Do stuff. Don't be 'safe'.
CrazyLegs
"Pork!!" said the Fish, and we all laughed.
....Because you can ruin them before you even knew what happened. And pester your parents to get you braces now, no matter how much you think they will hurt.
Also....dont try to be cool. Dont change yourself to impress other people...
I lost my concept of community when my community lost all concept of me.
Look out for that Janeway chick. She's gonna try and ruin this whole thing by ramming our timeship.
Get a low ID on Slashdot, get excellent Karma, sell it in EBay.
Yo Grark
Canadian Bred with American Buttering
Canadian Bred with American Buttering
Bide your time, for someday you will rule them all with an iron fist!
Take everything you got and bet on Buster Douglas when he fights Tyson.
-- A computer without COBOL and Fortran is like a piece of chocolate cake without ketchup and mustard
As opposed to what other kind of condom?
Stop by my site where I write about ERP systems & more
Big Bill: Hey kid wake up...
Big Bill: No..no..no you dont need you're glasses. Just listen to me
Little Bill: OK.
Big Bill: Comes 1990, go to Helsinki, find a guy named Linus Torvolds.
Little Bill: Line Who?
Big Bill: Listen kid trust me NO questions, just find This Linus guy, and give him all the software
Little Bill: Soft what?
Big Bill: Better find your glasses and take notes kid. Now wright this down!
Go find this Linus Torvolds guy in Helsinki and give him all the software he needs and even don't need.
Buy him a huge computer and pay his college fees. And give him a job after you fired Steve Ballmer. OK? Got that?
And trust me DO IT!!
1. Start going to the gym you lazy bastard. And put down the cheetos. Or you'll end up a flabby out-of-shape wimp in about 10 years. (did I just say that??)
2. Work harder in school! Study dammit! Or you'll be pretty dissappointed in about 10 years.
3. Get laid at every chance you get. Seize the day! Or you'll be pretty dissappointed with yourself in about 10 years.
Am I sensing a theme here??
I'd rather be a conservative nutjob than a liberal with no nuts and no job.
In the future (1995), you and Larry will be using Slackware, more specifically the nslookup command at work. Send in the damn registrations on all those domain names this time stupid, they are only $100 each for two years!!!
Bad boys rape our young girls but Violet gives willingly.
Better thing would be to register .coms related to sex.
"squat like a pro"
This place is going downhill fast...
1. Women always know everything. Don't bother trying to fight them. The battle has already taken place, you've lost, and you're in their hands without a hint of what's going on around you. Just remember to enjoy the rides.
2. Everything is recorded. Even though it might not jump out at you now, human experiences are also recorded, and through history and literature many lessons of life can be learned. Put down the Grisham, read "The American Scholar", find "The Autobiography of Malcolm X", find out who Claude Debussy was, and never look back.
...and sak yourself "how do they work?" "can I make my own?", and ooh, "about that internet thing your dad brought home in that black box. Learn html and write stupid pages to companies which you sell for many and many of $"
Hey! That's my sig you're smoking there!
DUCK!!!
*Splort*
Make sure girls know you're NOT gay.
Dear me,
Don't play Ultima Online!
Had it right in their song "20 Minutes of Oxygen":
If I had a brain, here's what I'd do
Build a time door, and visit my youth
This cigar burn is for effect
in the future, you won't forget:
When you're trapped in that airtight room
Flick the RED switch, but not the BLUE
Be patient with yourself.
1) leave high school early -- the last two years are a waste of time
1a) in a few years, you're gonna wanna leave home; it'll be hard, the alternative would be nice, but you gotta do what you gotta do
1b) learn guitar earlier
2) waiting to go to college is fine -- it worked out
3) be sure to be at the right party on the right day in the right year, for the woman you will meet and marry is truly the right one
4) being a boom and bust guy is just fine
you insensitive clod
Don't sit so damn close to the tv and computer monitor, you WILL go blind from it.
When you go back, ask Her to marry you. You'll never see Her again otherwise.
don't date guys that compare you to anime characters.anyone who prefers pixels to flesh is not worth it.
Oh wait, last time I had the oportunity to go back and tell myself something was June of 2001.
Should have waited longer...
Bad boys rape our young girls but Violet gives willingly.
If I could get through the gloom and misery caused by my father having just died:
1. You're a boy made from girl parts. Look into the whole transgender thing. You'll be much happier, much earlier.
2. Buy Microsoft stock.
3. Draw more.
4. Lottery numbers starting around my 18th birthday.
I'd tell myself a few things, but not necessarily at 12 years old.
At 12, I'd tell myself to join the wrestling team in junior high as the guidance counselor suggested. It would have boosted my confidence and self-image.
At 15, I'd tell myself that I'm gay, as to stop all the damn confusion about why I wasn't attracted to girls yet. Find that youth group and make some friends who can relate to you.
At 17, I'd tell myself to apply to a different university and major in computer science, history, and/or political science. You'll decide in about two years that working in broadcasting sucks major ass.
At 20, I'd tell myself to not even try to get back into a relationship with my first boyfriend. It'll just end again two years later. Doing so will have kept you in college, for sure.
At 24, I'd tell myself that you'll hopefully meet Devin and that you should have moved to New York City. I'd also tell myself not to get a job in or around the World Trade Center.
That's about it.
You will be one of it's early users. When they go public BUY THE HE11 OUT OF IT. Follow these directions and you could have retired at 26.
Alternate: same rule applies to mid 90's Cisco, or early 80's Microsoft.
Ever feel like you are driving the getaway car?
. . . to find out who you really are. Don't listen to what your father or mother, or neighbors, aunts or uncles think you should become. Sure, you might be good at computers -- but maybe you'd make a better social worker. Which leads to the second point:
#2 Don't base your life around money. If living at your mom's house a few extra years means you're happier with your life in the long run -- do it. Being rich is no good if all you do is work and never have time to enjoy it.
#3 Be yourself early on in life, because when you're 40 it's a hell of a lot harder to go back and change things. Experiment enough and TRY DIFFERENT THINGS very early on -- as early as possible. Take a middle approach to everything -- don't rule anything out, but don't blindly accept it either. If you find something that attracts your heart, and it feels right, then follow it until you find out it's not for you; you've lost nothing, and gained the experience of doing it.
#4 Education IS NOT WHAT YOU LEARN IN SCHOOL: Take enough from school to become functional in society (i.e. learn to read, learn basic mathematics). Ignore all culture aspects of your education. Contrary to what you think you are not inherently a citizen of any country; boundaries are false. Instead of learning American history there's no reason you shouldn't be learning Egyptian or Chinese history on your own. School makes you into a conformist, and a consumer. Pimp education enough to get your degree, and find work to progress in society -- but don't take it to heart. Don't be a blind follower. Look to role models outside of your closest circle. When you leave the world, leave something positive behind, otherwise you haven't accomplished anything.
#5 Before you try to love the opposite sex and get married, or find a girlfriend -- learn to deal with people NOT close to you in a loving manner, otherwise you're destined for failure.
#6 Don't be afraid to just BE. When you throw out society's norms you're going to face rejection -- LOVE IT. You'll be most despised during your High School years, and maybe even during college. It's OKAY. It's better to live your life believing in something, and trying to make it happen; in the end you'll think much more highly of yourself, especially when you see the results amongst your peers who took another path.
#7 Be moral. When someone does a favor for you, remember it. When you borrow money from someone, pay it back. Do acts of kindness to those you love the most. What goes around comes around; try to be an overall good person -- especially to those you love the most. If you love someone let them always know it, because they might not be around tomorrow.
Dear past self:
... for week two of 1996 they are ....... up to the present. Yeah, I'd be a billionaire. I could also tell my past self which stock to invest in each day that I know now grew the most on that day. Hmmm, I could be a trillionaire :-)
The winning Powerball lottery numbers for week one, 1996 are 23 53 27 06 28 12
Cyde Weys Musings - Scrutinizing the inscrutable
Never visit this site. Its a good way to kill your IQ points, make you retarded, and set you up for a future in selling fast food.
1) Stop being so self-conscious. None of the stuff you're worrying about right now matters in the long run.
2) Don't even think about going into academics. Find something that you like doing and that pays a decent amount of money.
3) Brush your teeth and floss regularly.
This is basically the same thing as, "You're screwing up, dude." But the difference is that it's delivered in a way that:
I'd *like* to think that if I thought an adult wasn't trying to control me, that I'd have a better shot at actually hearing what they were trying to say. Which is, "You're the primary one who's going to enjoy or suffer from your decisions, so choose wisely. If you have any questions, I'll be happy to take a run at them. If not, that's cool, too. Good luck." I'd like to think that this sort of message would get me to think about what I was doing instead of just blindly reacting to what an authority figure was telling me.
But who knows? In retrospect my parents were *MUCH* smarter than they seemed at the time, and they weren't able to get through.
Key to financial independence: Spend less than you earn. Save and invest the difference. Do it for a long time.
.. because he wouldn't hear it over the Nintendo.
.. because he thought he knew everything anyway.
.. because I don't remember what I had for lunch yesterday, forget what some creepy dude told me while I was trying to peek down girls' shirts.
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups... especially in Washington.
get this straight, pot is NOT addictive. It is fun however. Same goes for alcohol, drink lots. You can still get A's even doing that shit, I know from experience.
What signature defines me as a person?
Don't go along with the dumb guidance counselor who insisted that you follow the "normal" course progression through the Math department. It doesn't matter if you are kicking everyone else in the area at math and science, there are other fishes in bigger ponds. Start working at it now so you don't have to play catch up all your life. BTW, trust your instincts when you pick a PhD program someday, you'll like it.
My 12yo self could probably give me some insight that comes harder now. Things are much cloudier now, like Solomon said.
Either that or, "Don't quick skating! Hardcore, RAHH!"
Try my nuts to your fist style!
It would be different if I got to go back and 'posess' my 12 year old body because I wouldn't have to deal with my own stupidity and bull headedness.
For those of you wondering... It does still exist... Screw the 12 year old I wish I could send something back 10 min ago!!!
1. Many of the things you suspect are true.
2. School is even less important than you think it is. Turns out you really didn't need calculus. Or French.
3. Don't follow any trends. Music, fashion, films. They're bogus, and they just want your money.
4. It is actually true that there are some cool adults. Seriously. But you won't likely find them in your teachers or parents friends.
5. Sell the Amiga; it ain't going anywhere."
If Jesus wants me it knows where to find me.
I mean, maybe I could avoid some embarising moments, or improve on areas of my life that I am currently not happy with, but if my earlier self were to take my advise I absolutely would NOT be the same person now. While my personality is more or less intact my beliefs, attitudes, and ability to appreciate the events in my life are completely different now from what they were only a few years ago, let alone from when I was in highschool. And it is the events in my life, both good and bad, that have shaped these parts of my self.
Humans rarely learn anything, let alone change their behavior based on what they've learned, unless they've somehow suffered personally. Even our ability to learn from the misfortune of others is derived from our having screwed up and suffered the consequences often enough to realize on something more than an abstract or academic level that it can happen to us too.
I quess what I'm getting at is that if you were to go back in time and inform your earlier self about how great Tamarind Nectar tastes or that he shouldn't waste his time on New Coke then you've probably saved your self a few bucks with no harm done. If you go back and start sorting out your problems with the benifit of hind-site derived from what you learned from the problems then you're cheating your former self out of a learning experience. If you solve enough of your problems this way you'll end up cheating your former self out of learning how to learn from others.
I know that were I to do this my former self would end up an unempathetic jerk who absolutely would not appreciate the activities that I enjoy.
Anyway, just a thought.
Dosent mean growing up.
adventure-today.com
is going to die on . Pop her tires or something the night before...in fact, pop all the tires on all the cars/trucks at the house.
A modern day witchhunt.
Being told you were above average in intelligence in grade school isn't going to get you by in high school or college. Get serious about school, and do it NOW, or you'll end up taking way too long to get your degree.
You *will* find the right girl, and she *will* be worth all the "sufffering".
Your grandparentss love to tell stories. Don't wait until "next time" to ask them about when they were younger, because soon enough, there won't be a next time.
Come to the University of Mars! Classes starting soon!
you will start to think you are goofing off too much in high school. You're WRONG! Goof off as much as you possibly can, you'll thank me in the long run.
Nice guys finish last.
White-collar crime pays when you're still a minor.
If you think she likes you she probably does.
Don't let you parents send you to the all male school.
Invest all your college money in the NASDAQ stock with ticker symbol MSFT.
or you tell him to register it and sell it on ebay for lots of money...
please me, have no regrets.
I know its easy to go the "+1 Funny" route here and tell everyone to get ready to jerk off a lot and buy stock in [some company that will explode with profits], but after thinking about this for awhile, I've deduced my advice to a sentence:
Don't take shit.
My life from 12-17 generally consisted of me putting up with bullying, putting up with being put down, putting up with people who had no business trying to tell me what to do, and even when they had that right, they did it all the wrong way. A little standing up for yourself goes a long way.
What would I tell myself? When that bully picks on you, punch him in the face as hard as you can. Go Ender on him--don't stop until they pull you off of him. I guarantee that he'll never try it again, yet this amazing fact eluded me, and I just assumed that no matter what I did, and that included fighting back, that I would be stuck in my little hole of miserableness forever.
Don't let your boss walk all over you. When I entered the "corporate world," also known as the Full Time Job, my little "Computer Operator" job got me nothing but headaches and more miserableness. Just when I thought I had escaped the clutches of bullies and put downs, here comes Office Politics to screw it all up again. Suddenly my boss would take credit for all my work and leave me hung out to dry when I made a mistake, holding myself up to the whole place as an example of How To Screw Up Rightly. The more I think about it, the more it hurts in the futility of it all.
Did I ever finally grow some gumption and let it fly? Sure. But it was far too late. The damage had been done, and this fantastic article rang so true my ears are still ringing. I told off my old boss, let the higher ups know what was going on, and moved on to greener pastures. I settled down, found a wonderful wife and now have a gorgeous 8 month old daughter who I value more than my own life. And I'll be sure to let her know, when she turns 12, that life isn't about the microcosm of high school, or the inmates, er, students in it.
My greatest hope would be that my 12 year old self would be, at the very least, left alone. And that's more than most depressed, repressed teenagers get.
Why even bother with this useless exercise, you cant do it...
Just a slow news day?
---- Booth was a patriot ----
You know those girls in the 7th grade who are saying nice and embarrasing things about you, and you don't even know their names? Don't run from them; if you do, you'll never get a date in high school... and I'm tired of living alone at age 32. Also, stop admiring the girls you like from afar.
Yep, 7th grade is where it all went wrong for me.
Oh, and in 9th grade, you'll discover Ultima IV. See if you can get Mom and Dad to spring for a store bought version, it's much better and easier with the manual!
"Common Sense Ain't" -Unknown
I was 7 in 1982. And on welfare. We got a trash-80 for christmas.
I'd give myself a book that covers the events and trends of the 90's.
"Mom, Dad, we need to start investing. NOW.
"Don't worry, school may seem like hell now, but it all works out in the end. And get used to not being understood by everyone. The gap gets wider the older you get."
Perhaps things like the obligatory "Buy $Company" or so on. Something fun like "No, your parents will never understand you, give up trying, and keep doing it."
I think the best thing I could tell myself that a 12 year old me would understand and value, "Don't worry, no matter what, it will all be okay."
WTF is the "wrong" way? Twisting?
Spend the next 15 years thinking of something really smart to tell your 12-year-old self.
RMN
~~~
If you see a guy who looks like you on a flying skateboard, stay out of his way.
... don't be stingy.
Hey what? You sure you're a nerd yourself? The first Macintosh was released in 1984. Before that there was Commodore Pet, Vic-20, and C-64, TRS-80, Sinclairs, Apple II(e), Apple IIgs, and a host of other very general purpose home computers. Many of my friends had one, as did we. And before I had a computer at home I played with everything from a teletype to a card-based system to a Pet. In 5th grade I was changing the BASIC code to a little game called "Oregon Trails" so that I wouldn't lose. That would have been before I was 12 and before 1982 (considering I turned 12 in 1981).
I do not have a signature
I just want to say one word to you... ''plastics''.
Open source development is my way of competing with the low-cost programmers in India...
Register immediately. Get ID #001.
Wait until 2003. Go to a site called 'ebay'. Sell said slashdot ID. Let your mind boggle that you now have $81.
My advice? Stop blowing things up so I don't go to prison. Oh, how prison sucked.
"You know that feeling you have deep down inside that life's gonna suck when you grow up? You're absolutely right, but you wouldn't want to miss a single moment of it." ... and here's an archive of Motley Fool columns from 1992-2003 ...
The bitter lessons of a veteran coder: http://bitterprogrammer.blogspot.com
Mine is simple enough...
Drugs are overrated.
Your mind is screwed up enough already, why fuck with it?
when a whole bunch of nerdy 12-year-olds suddenly start chasing ya, keep running! :)
I would tell myself to run more, go outside more, and to get contacts asap!
Or at least get some non-dorky glasses....My poor pre-teen self.
Fitness:
Get in shape now... don't give me that smaht@$$ crap, do it or you will regret it you little snot nosed brat.
General:
Crash and burn to live and learn, repeat as necesarry when dealing with Women.
Women:
Find someone with a cluebat and ask them to apply it liberally as often as possible and pray for the day you actually develope a clue.
In the meantime dtich the trumpet for the Guitar now instead of later.
Learn to dance, sure you feel stupid but it pays off... truuuust me.
Job:
Your right, the computer job market will go to shit when you graduate, don't worry you will be happy with where you wind up and you wouldn't belive me if I told you. Besides I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise.
I don't ask you to be me. I only ask you not expect me to be you.
i don't know where you live, but in my state, public school teachers make a ton of money...
please me, have no regrets.
you'd think "wouldn't the entire internet hate me if I...." and end up with something worse, if such a thing is possible
You can't judge a book by the way it wears its hair.
"In almost three years, you'll be advising your 12 year old self"
That'd probably make one wonder, if you got such a message, when you were 12 years old
Girls like it too
Despite the fact that its grossly overbudget and you think Celine Dion sucks, when your uncle comes at you with an offer to jump in and help refinance that fucked up Titanic movie venture for a percentage of profit, sell the house and everything you have and toss it in.
Dude, I had two computers on my desk in '80 (well, somewhere on the desk buried amidst all the other electronics junk) when I was twelve. No, I wasn't rich, either - 3 paper routes, mowed lawns and farm work.
Boo hoo; so go cry your eyes out.
Nah na na na na na
SB
It's old. The more humans I meet, the more I like my cats. At least they are honest.
- You know how you like computers? Don't let anything else distract you from that; keep learning!
- Convince your mom and dad to let you learn a martial art. You should know how to defend yourself, but also how to control your temper.
- Don't ride down the hill so fast, you really will hurt yourself someday.
Have you read the Moderation Guidelines Addendum?
Anything you want to do, just go ahead and do it. Don't worry about the others, there will always be some people who hate you no matter what.
I'd say,
;)
"Here is a copy of the Wall Street Journal from each month between then and now.
Now, give these to Dad and Grandpa, and get _them_ to use the information and leverage _their_ savings."
Always consider the advantages of helping others help you.
The people you think know what they are doing, don't
`There are better things to do with your time than read slashdot articles.'
ID-10-T is a way of life
Don't read or watch the news.
Even more so when they start talking about OJ, and before you ask it is not the drink I am refering to.
I think my general advice would be best taken from C.S. Lewis's The Magician's Nephew:
"Make your choice, adventurous stranger, strike the bell and bide the danger; or wonder, till it drives you mad, what would have followed if you had."
This sig no verb.
When I was 12, I was looking at girls. I win!
If I could tell myself something and actually have me listen to it, then I'd tell myself to be more outspoken about my religious convictions.
However, other than that I'm not sure how much I would tell me... Because on the flip side, if I changed things in the past I would have lost experiences I value now, even though at the time they may have sucked. So I tend to think that for most people you'd be better off not changing things, because even horrible events in your life can have positive outcomes you never would have considered beforehand.
That's just my $0.02, not meant to be inflammatory or anything.
myself the score of every Super Bowl, World Series, and World Cup. Man I'd be rich as hell! Just like Marty McFly thought of in B2TF part 2. :)
When all else fails, piss on it. At least you will feel better in some kind of way.
Do you see how dorky your parents are?
Even they found each other, fell in love, and got married somehow. There are better things to stress out about than your lack of a {girl,boy}friend.
You won't find her, but you will find some of her friends. They will let you sleep on the floor in their hotel room
The next morning, you will be in a car with her friends. You will have your head out the window in the back letting the wind dry your hair.
When the driver of the car asks you if you have a job because "we need more people like you", don't think about the fact that you know nothing about Computer Graphics.....take the job.
I rarely read replies, it's my opinion and if you thought about your opinion a little more, I'm OK with that.
Hey there, self. I've come here to tell you two things. First, you turn out okay. Second, I'm not going to tell you anymore because you need to take the same roads I took, make the same decisions, make the same mistakes as I did. You need to do that because you are going to have children someday and they are going to be the greatest joy of your life, the center of your universe, and you are going to be the best father ever. So just keep doing what you're doing. It won't always be happy times but trust me, they are worth it.
I live ze unknown. I love ze unknown. I am ze unknown.
"Here you are at twice your age... and you still aren't rich from your extensive Garbage Pail Kids collection."
Go to that "Spin The Bottle" party with foxy Kathy Sherwood!
Hey self,
Romantic relationships are gonna fuck you up and fuck you over. Really badly. Big time.
Spill hot McDonald's coffee on yourself before anyone else does, but make sure you don't hit any "vitals."
You won't go blind and you won't go to hell. Everyone does it.
I would tell myself to alternate my grip, so as to avoid "it" leaning to the left.
and have a real job.
If I sent a message to my 12 year old former self, it wouldn't be advice. The message would be something on the order of "Hey, future self here. Good job, Charles; well done." and I wouldn't worry a damn bit about missed opportunity.
so just keep wasting it you little bastard!
Canthros
Dear self:
Religion is a myth devised to keep the masses in line. Avoid anyone calling themselves 'brother' or 'elder' or wanting money to teach you what god wants. If it brings guilt instead of happiness, it WRONG.
Don't be so arrogant as to think that just because the average wasp believes that some guy hung up on a cross is going to save them that other forms of spirituality aren't valid.
Moreover, if you don't innately believe it, don't try to convince yourself it's true. Have faith in your own inner voice.
Don't feel guilty about sex. . . . . it's natural.
Give all of yourself in you relationships and expect the same. Be completely honest w/everyone. Everyone is responsible for their own emotions.
Most of all, divorce is not the end of the world.
...EVERY time! oh yeah, and....
20yr old self: "You see, 12yr old self, in SOVIET RUSSIA Beowulf Clusters Imagine You!"
12yr old self: "Russia has clusters of Beo Wolves that imagine me?
Probably something along the lines of "You're okay, so just relax. Lighten up a bit."
Save every damn dime I get until the age of 25, and then put it all into Starnet stock when it's at $.60. Then sell when it hits $25 8 months later.
Then take all of that, and throw it into Nvidia's stock and sell off all that when that quintuples.
Then get completely out of the stock market, and instead buy a bunch of income properties, and do that as my "job".
And also, I'd tell me before I found out the hard way that I am allergic to car body filler.
Don't go to the grocery store with your mother on July 16th, 1990. The car will get hit from the passanger side while crossing the intersection in front of Lincoln Plaza. Although Mom survives the accident regardless, you will be killed a split second after impact. So yeah, just stay home and play on your Atari 7800 that day.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
[PowerPoint] is a tool for capitalist presentation
"If you could send a message back to your nerdy unpopular 12 year old self, what would you say?"
1. Buy Microsoft, Dell, and EMC.
2. When Jill tries to get busy with you, don't let your morals get in the way.
3. Go short the Nasdaq on March 1, 2000.
GF.
Lots of petrified grits
Funny, I seem to remember having a Texas Instruments computer in 1982. I think it was a ti99/4a. I was 9 and not particularly rich.
-- Give me ambiguity or give me something else!
You're 7th grade band teacher is borking the band girls. Grab him by the balls your first day of band and let him know you know, things will be a lot easier after that.
Life gets much much much better after high school. Do whatever you can to get through it until then.
When your 25 year old hottie boss leans back in the jeep and says, "This would make a great makeout place", follow your insticts, don't be a pussy!
Casca
I think my new advice would be to start using the word "asshead"! That's awesome!
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one " -Albert Einstein
Was that a 12 Monkeys reference? If so, nice.
Wer mit Ungeheuern kämpft, mag zusehn, dass er nicht dabei zum Ungeheuer wird. --Nietzsche
Note to 12-year old self:
People who look and act confident most often haven't the slightest clue what they are doing.
You do. Act confident.
Assuming that the goal of the question is to actually give advice to real kids as if we were giving it to ourselves (that is, lottery numbers, patent descriptions and stock tips from 12 years ago won't benefit kids today), here's what I can say:
1) Don't be a poser -- other kids won't be genuinely impressed, so it's just not worth the effort. Besides...
2) After you graduate from HS and go off to college, there will be very few people from your home town that you will ever see again -- and they'll all have personal issues (and one of them will be utterly stoned), so it's not an entirely bad thing.
3) Get over your mental block and get your driver's license. This will allow you to go to CC and take Japanese classes (so you won't have to rely on subtitles) instead of wasting time learning Spanish in High School.
4) Don't bother chasing a job to pay for college. There's plenty of scholarship funding for people who study hard and do debate, neither of which require mind-numbing manual labor with shallow co-workers. Sports are also well funded, but not well enough to keep up with the amount of kids trying for them.
5) Don't bother chasing or pining for women -- inclusive of The Redhead (or the Japanese collector you'll meet in a couple of years). The ones you need will be inexplicably drawn to you. You'll know who they are because you'll be able to talk to them almost as naturally as you converse with the voices in your head. (And the one you finally end up with will be, ah, "happier" because you didn't spend your early years womanizing...)
6) The little redneck town you're growing up in... sucks. Your world-view is horribly skewed because of it. Sorry. It'll get better. (Though your parents won't move until you've gone away to college -- then they'll buy a larger house in a nicer town... with a hot tub! Don't hold it against them; the ladies who go home with you like hot tubs.)
7) Aardvarks are good animal totems. Cats are better. Stop wishing for a dumb servile dog.
8) Don't collect -- especially anything that comes in card format. Learn to draw instead.
9) Don't waste time with arcade games. Learn martial arts (Kung-Fu or Akido come to mind) instead.
10) Caffeine is power. Power corrupts. Power is also a whole lot of fun. Use it cautiously. But don't start on an empty stomach!
11) Eat well and excercise well. You'll generally feel better and more up to do what you want (but are generally lacking the inertia) to do. I know that this is particularly difficult for you, but trust me on it.
12) When you are offered drugs in a nice social college setting, just politely decline and pass them on. Everybody else will be too busy getting stoned to care or notice. (Besides, caffeine is perfectly legal, what more do you want?)
12) In the future, you will wear big black boots, contact lenses or really small-framed glasses, a wool sweater with either a mock-turtleneck or t-shirt underneath, boxer shorts, comfortable -- not trendy -- jeans or green corduroys, and a soft and open flowing trenchcoat. Your hair will be in a ponytail. You will have sideburns that show the red flashings in your hair. Your eyes will glow with a wild intensity. You will be both clean and comfortable. Women will -- Surprise! -- find you mind-numbingly sexy. And the best part is that you can get started on this list now...
... despite the fact that my youth was pure f***ing midwestern hell. I want everything EXACTLY the way it is. I'm livin' the life in Cali, and those jerks in Iowa KNOW IT! Whenever I go back to visit my Dad, the same people who made my life in high school a living hell spend all of their time sucking up to the visiting "rock star". In short, if my youth hadn't sucked so much, my adult life would never have been so satisfying.
It isn't a memory leak. It's an object life-span issue.
After reading over the majority of the higher rated posts, does anyone else notice that almost everyone mentions something about girls? This either proves that 95% of us are all guys or there are a lot of lesbians out there.
Beware of Monosodium Glutamate! It is evil !
The years of suffering I went through because of that fucking additive...
You can't take the sky from me...
Ditch the proto-Elvis Costello glasses and the polyester slacks. Wear jeans and t-shirts. It's easy, and while it probably won't make you popular, it will make you less unpopular. For god's sake, fight the battles that matter: it doesn't matter if you look like the herd, as long as you don't think like them.
Later on, when you get to college, you can go back to looking as geeky as you want, because by then Elvis Costello will actually exist, and people will assume you're some kind of trendy post punk.
My 12-year-old self would know who I was talking about. One of my big regrets is that I never took the chance with girls when I was younger. Even getting painfully rejected would have possibly made me that much mre comfortable in the meantime.
Instead, I spent the next five years in fear of girls, then dated a girl for 1.5 months, then nothing for years, until this past summer.
Oh well, all's well that ends well!
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one " -Albert Einstein
That's the one thing from my childhood I want, and can never get back... all the things I wrote as a Kid. My mom has some of it, and I have some, but there is very little. I kept a journal through probably the toughest 2 years of my life, and I didn't make a backup of it when I sold that computer. What was I thinking?!
I don't think you could afford a macintosh in 1984 if you were 12 in 1982.... unless you made $3000 selling lemonade at 5 cents a cup.
What does every 12 year old need more than advice???? *MONEY*
Hey kid, here is my life's savings. Go nuts.
Take big risks now, they might not be as big as you think, and even if you fail, if its something worth while it says a lot about you.
-Rob
But often I envision going happily along until about 1983, then Microsoft goes out of business. A voice booms down from the sky: "Did you think I was going to put you back down in the same timeline???"
Miko O'Sullivan
I wasn't going to respond, but then here's a chance to get it off my chest
Note to 12 year old self:
Along will come the most beautiful woman in the world. Don't *ever* let her go. *Ever*
So rise up, all ye lost ones, as one, we'll claw the clouds.
When you buy Comparator stock at $0.06 and it goes up to $1.25, SELL IT BEFORE YOU GET BURNED!
Seriously though, I'd tell me to relax-- nothing is as important as I thought when I was 12-- And talk to more girls in school.
Wer mit Ungeheuern kämpft, mag zusehn, dass er nicht dabei zum Ungeheuer wird. --Nietzsche
1. In about a year or two, your parents marriage will begin to dissolve before your eyes. It will be ugly, but IT IS NOT YOUR PROBLEM!
2. Take more computer science classes in University, and learn C. And its worth learning as much as you can about emacs.
Even heroes have the right to dream
Don't play EverQuest. Resist the urge. Just don't.
If you don't have your health... you don't have anything.
Find out what you're about. Start now, 'cause you'll spend a lot of time figuring it out. There's a lot more to life than just a career.
Think about finding a woman you would want to be in your family instead of someone you want to have sex with.
Pick one of the following: Salsa, Swing, Argentine Tango 2 classes a week for at least 6 months should do it. Learning any of these dances will turn a nerdy boy into a cool man (and popular with a lot of sexy women). Not only will your social life will turn around, you will be healthier, and you will enjoy life more. People will be impressed by your skills, and think you are more than just a brain. (I did not start until I was 30, but I made up for lost time.)
excitingthingstodo.blogspot.com
and you can't make yourself concentrate by trying harder. You have attention deficit disorder.
After you buy Microsoft, make all those millions, sock them away in the bank, and need to access those funds...
...don't use your ATM card.
Everyone will start to cheer when you put on your sailin' shoes.
... that could take so much time in 2002 are all useless.
Read and post on Slashdot to fill your time in a more constructive way.
Get a haircut... and NO, that does NOT mean that you should shave your head, especially in the middle of winter. And, um, get a girlfriend or something.
- Lord loves a workin' man.
- Don't trust whitey.
- See a doctor and get rid of it.
But honestly, I GOT the best advice in the world, from my parents, before I went to college. They said,"College is not about grades, and it's not about classes. It's all about getting to know people that you wouldn't otherwise have gotten to know."
Education is the silver bullet.
really. drugs are bad.
Go into the kitchen and drink everything under the sink. Completely. Even the stuff that burns your mouth.
It will uh... raise your Charisma to 18!
-----
Keep bugging your school shrink to look into something called Asperger's Syndrome. It's the real name for nerdy kid. This is important. Some of us do kill ourselves before we escape high school. I just squeeked by.
Posted this question on my journal about a year ago and got some very thoughtful answers from my readers.
Also - if I go and grab a bunch of domains, make sure that after I register sex.com, I make sure to keep it from getting ganked from underneath me.
The Pjammer Chronicles --
ZX-80, built it from a kit, was ~11 or 12
NOW!!
Eat at Joe's.
1) Everyone has been, and will keep telling you, to turn the other cheek.
Everyone is full of shit.
Trust yourself and stand up for yourself--even if it gets you in trouble. Nobody else cares more about your life than they do about their own. Challenge everything, especially those who challenge you.
2) Don't be afraid to piss people off.
Not everyone understands the same concepts of right and wrong that you do; not everyone shares your goals or respects your rights to them. If you wait for handouts, you get leftovers; if you wait for respect, you get pity. Trust your heart to tell you what you want, and don't let other people's agendas impede your progress (this includes your family) (see #1).
3) Everyone is bluffing. Nobody is really as cool or put-together or powerful as you think they are--or at the very least, you are a match for them. Never question your ability to compete.
4) You should bluff, too. Act like you have a right to what you want, and people will believe you (most people don't realize #3). And if someone tries to call your bluff, never back down. Herein lies the power to do and be whatever you want in life. Try it, it works.
5) Your parents are lousy role models or I wouldn't have to be telling you these things. You're going to have to go outside of your family to find the inspiration and support you need to be successful in life.
I would say "The following are good times to have protection on hand"
I'd tell myself to go fishing with Grandpa more. He likes it, and he won't be around forever. And he won't even mind when you tell him to put the fish back...
And for Jebus' sake, don't be so freakin' self conscious! You're perfectly fine the way you are.
mah na mah na.
"You're going to be lonely for a long time. But by understanding this condition that makes everyone else behave so inexplicably, it may be a shorter time than I have suffered."
"Kill yourself now"
Follow your dreams early in life...they are easier to achieve when you start earlier.
What about those of us who don't have any dreams? We're always told to do what we love and we don't love anything*.
I don't know if there's anything I'd tell my 12 year old self from this point in time, but I sure wish a future self would come back and tell me what to dream, or at least assure me that there is something.
* I used to love programming and all other things computery, but now I don't like anything and I don't know why. (No, I didn't have a bad job burn me out, I haven't even graduated high school. Yes, I have explored things outside computers and am unable to find a reason to care.)
acutalyl the other guy was right the PC as in personal computers and not teh big blocky expensive things that colleges and governments/businesses used was first introduced in 1975 with the Altair
then 1976 with the Apple 1..
both sold extremely well and were meant for the general market and not the rich geeky college kids.
Hold it down to one message per post. We'll send your younger self 10 of the highest-moderated questions and post your answers as soon as we get them back.
I think I would and go and tell myself try and learn some music - it is such a useful tool to get laid...
Otherwise I think I did all the right things soo....
Comment removed based on user account deletion
1) Don't worry about highschool, your doing all right.
2) Follow the pastors advice and go to Southern Adventist Univeristy.
3) Do have the guts to date that beautiful red head that works in the caf.
4) Do marry that beautiful redhead!
If you do that you'll be as happy as I am ( being married to a redhead!)
digitalLoki
Mastrubation won't make you go blind.
Stay the fuck away from women; in the year 1995, you'll have access to more pornography than you can possibly view in your lifetime, free.
These are my friends, See how they glisten. See this one shine, how he smiles in the light.
Harlan Ellison wrote a really marvelous speculative fiction tale about just this topic, so for his response to this, hunt up a copy of the short story "One Life, Furnished In Early Poverty."
You are right: most things you learn in school do turn out to be irrelevant for you later in life. But you are totally wrong about which ones.
And you are also right about this one: The teacher who always gets needlessly upset about stuff will in fact die from a heart attack.
Marklar: marklar
1) your mother is in a cult, don't let her brainwash you and destroy your sense of self/ego
2) at age 16, avoid that odd girl in your summer school class but not for reasons you suspect
3) go to art school even if the parents refuse to pay, computers will lead to a lifetime of unsatisfying wageslavery
4) don't worry so damn much
5) you don't need to be normal
Zero tolerance equals zero intelligence
I'd tell myself to take Math class more seriously, to have screwed (name withheld) when I had the chance instead of worrying if her parents would come home and finally to start saving money. Actually I'm 33 and still haven't started that last one.
I've hit Karma 50 and gotten a Score:5, Troll... I win!
I do not understand people who think engineering is such a great job, because I am studying it and it is a lot of work. While other people are having fun I am staying a wake sometimes 2-3 days a week without sleep completing work, working hard to pull a GPA higher than 3. The liberal arts people have incredibly high GPAs without the work. Not to mention they get jobs out of school that quote unquote "a trained monkey could do" making $40,000-50,000 while most engineers are working hard to make money like that. Yeah the only reason I do it is because it intrests me and I do not think I will work as an engineer. Lets say was a good job until suits decided they could work us to death and pay us less.
Buy Microsoft Stock!
1) Learn to speak Inuit. It has become the international language.
2) Don't become an airplane pilot. Airplanes became obsolete when the aliens gave us teleportation.
3) Sell Microsoft.
4) Stop reading Slashdot. The FBI is profiling everyone who reads Slashdot.
Oh damn... sorry wrong message board. I am from 2030 trying to warn my 20 year old self...
- For the complete works of Shakespeare: cat
... take the blue pill!
Don't wait for Duke Nukem Forever.
The title is more suitable than you'll ever comprehend.
Tall and skinny now is an ASSET.
Your mother's dying will make you stronger. But cry now & get the grieving over with BEFORE college.
Do not let your stepmonster bother you. She's little and petty; she will change after a house fire in 1999.
GET SOME SELF-CONFIDENCE! Go for it! Don't be afraid of engineering! You're smarter than everyone says you are!
Pierce stuff in college before marrying someone who hates it. Trust me on this one.
You look GOOD with black hair--goth is you!
Oh, and so much more...
Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily this is not difficult. -Whitton
.. is normally dangerous, not because you know what bad things will happen, but because you changed with that knowledge, and the future will not be the same.
Even knowing that I will live till now would change my life, and maybe in a way the actual reality, and the final result could be far worse than actual one. What puts a little problem: should I say that I'm myself older? if not would my younger me follow my advice?
Also I could not follow the safe way, and take the risk, but this must worth it, and probably could be only one shot, if its big all could change.
In this case my best try would be checking what happened a bit after I would contact myself, and take advantage of it, like giving a paper with lotto numbers, or say something like "be there, avoid that and be a hero", and pray that what I changed on my life don't put me in Twin Towers when the attack, or in a plane that will crash, or whatever thing that make things worse, not better, that are now.
Ask Marijke D. out on a date, please, she likes you too. She's the one your meant to be with
(1) don't stay in a relationship that's anything less than euphoric for at least the first 3 months and
(2) don't stay with anyone you (majorly) fight with more than twice a year. (yes it is possible).
i'm thinking that the reason there's so little advice to give is that by 25 there's a good chance that you have learned not to have regrets. and once you have no regrets, its difficult to say that you would have changed anything.
the real evil is not what people think - its how people think
You can always regret it later, if you like.
"In 7 years, Andrew Wood, the lead singer of a band called Mother Love Bone is going to O.D. on heroin. The rest of the band is going to look for a new lead singer, and they're going to call themselves 'Pearl Jam'. Do everything you can to be that new lead singer. Here's the sheet music to the songs, 'Once', 'Even Flow', 'Alive', 'Why Go', 'Black', 'Jeremy', 'Oceans', 'Porch', 'Garden', Deep', and 'Release.' Learn them well!"
Education is the silver bullet.
You penis will be normal sized.
Don't start smoking pot next year.
You have no musical talent.
Go to med school.
Never date girls named Liz.
-- www.globaltics.net
Political discussion for a new world
Wear a condom, or avoid sex altogether.
I was a teenage parent at 16, and believe me, it made my life much more difficult. I'm doing well now, and I'm quite happy with my life, but ages 16-24 were hell.
FTW!
- The word is a virus.
christy wilson ??
I had a really good female friend in junior-highschool by that exact name.
I was in Minneapolis, MN at that time.
Any connection ????
Kyle
stop drinking beer and watching pornos
Dear Chris,
When you turn 19 you will, for some really stupid reason, decide that long hair is cool and looks good on you.
It doesn't. Your passport photo is an embarassment that you will live with for 10 years.
Get a dog.
Someone hates these cans.
"Hi 12 year old self, here's a list of people you'll meet, the ones to avoid are highlighted. Also, here is a list of the winners of several sporting events that had high odds against them."
There are no tiger attacks in my area and it's all because this rock I'm holding keeps the tigers away.
And don't you eat that yellow snow!
Eat at Joe's.
And if you MUST insist on joining that cult, leave when the youth pastor does. Then get laid.
Your parents will not kick you out, and your friends will not all reject you.
Hey, I loaded up IE and typed "about:Mozilla" in the address bar. I got a special page (res://mshtml.dll/about.moz) but it was just blank and blue. The contents were:
<HTML>
<HEAD>
<BODY bgcolor="#000080" text="#FFFFFF">
</BODY>
</HTML>
That was in IE 6.0.2800.1106.
I'm guessing that since you put it in your sig, there's some other version that has something better... What was it?
Don't worry about it... it will get bigger.
Yes, she really does like you. You will realize this in another ten years and kick yourself that you did not ask her out. So go do it.
(this advice multiplied by 3 or 4...)
Mine'd be something like:
1. Be extra nice to your mother, she won't be around forever. (I don't think I'd really want to tell my 12-year-old self that she had only four years left, though.)
2. Don't just work around the agoraphobia, get help.
3. When you get to college and start having outright panic attacks, don't go whinging about your childhood to a bunch of counselors for nine years. See a doctor. Maybe by 1987 they'll have some idea how to treat psychiatric problems like anxiety and depression. By the time you graduate they DEFINITELY will have some idea.
4. Hey, on the "I'm not gonna drink 'cause it's easier not to start than it is to stop" thing--good thinking, kid. Still sticking to that plan at 33.
6. Less sugar and junk food, more protein and veggies.
7. You're gonna turn out great. Really.
I think, among other things, I would give my 12 year-old self the lyrics to Five Iron Frenzy's "Sucker Punch":
Coke bottle glasses,
I'm sitting in the corner with my finger up my nose,
And my shoelaces untied again,
Another day of school with no friends.
A social outcast,
Two grades ahead in math, with my highwater pants,
Giving meaning to pencil-necked-geek,
A dork or so to speak, tongue-in-cheek.
They're all sucker-punching me,
Get in line for a wedgie.
All I want and all I need,
Is someone who believes in me.
A song sung for underdogs, for all the left out.
A flag flying for losers, somewhere in the Heavens.
The God of ever-lasting comfort, believed in me,
Loved me when I was faithless, he still died for me.
Junior High schooler
With pencils in my pockets, and my Trapper Keeper busted,
Spilling papers and books on the floor,
Not wanting seventh grade anymore.
Another class-clown,
Acting like a goof to be accepted by my peers,
Giving meaning to pencil-necked-geek,
a dork or so to speak, tongue in cheek.
They're all sucker-punching me,
Get in line for a wedgie.
All I want and all I need,
Is someone who believes in me.
A song sung for underdogs, for all the left out.
A flag flying for losers, somewhere in the Heavens.
The God of ever-lasting comfort, believed in me,
Loved me when I was faithless, he still died for--
A song sung for underdogs, for all the left out.
A flag flying for losers, somewhere in the Heavens.
The God of ever-lasting comfort, believed in me,
Loved me when I was faithless, he still died for me.
(posted without permission)
"And there be unix which have made themselves unix for the kingdom of heaven's sake." - Matt. 19:12
Skip the art classes take computer science.
get parents to invest in modem.
Prepare my self for the geek that I would become
madness takes its toll please have exact change
I just figured out a way to send a message back in time to myself when I was 12. Yes, that's YOU I'm talking about. I'm you. I mean I was. You are me. I mean you will be me. Anyway here's the point, attached are the plans for the device so you can send a message to yourself when you were 6. Use it wisely!
- For the complete works of Shakespeare: cat
You'll know what I'm talking about when the time arrives.
It's rare that you're presented with a knob whose only two positions are Make History and Flee Your Glorious Destiny.
When you are 30 and you are alone in the mountains with your wife's boss, fucking kill him and bury him in the snow.
He's screwing your wife.
8. Learn to count... (or is that 5?)
Don't get married. She'll destroy your life.
You might think right now that you're never going to get laid. You might be desperate and think that you should give it away to the first skank that comes along. You might be one horny mofo.
KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS, JACKASS!
And here, use lotion. It's almost as good as the nasty chicks you'd end up with and believe me, you'll feel better about yourself in a few years.
Oh yeah, and next year on halloween, don't skateboard on the bayou. You'll get your leg broken, dumbass!
And another thing, I love you. You're a good kid. Don't listen to all those fuckers who'll tell you otherwise.
Hey asshead, this guy was 12 in 1982. The only people who had computers in 82 were rich geeky college kids and big companies. Just because you were 12 in 1998 doesn't mean everyone was.
No need to call someone an asshead. There are many instances of folks who owned computers back then and they were not rich or part of a big company. I mowed lawns for two years and purchased my first computer, an Apple ][+ in 1981. At the time, we were definately not well to do. That computer got me my first job ( at age 12 in 1982) at our local school of medicine as the tech support guy (before that was a title) for all the MD's and PhD's running Visicalc and such on their Apples and TRS-80's.
Visit Jonesblog and say hello.
"I would tell myself to not register slashdot.org as doing so would mean there is no slashdot to ask this question and thus I couldn't have made the initial change thus causing a paradox."
;)
You're completely wrong. But then again, I subscribe to Star Trek physics.
Instead of worrying about my nerdiness I think I would use my one message for something more important. I assume only one topic but no length limit on message. Something like perhaps:
"Early on September 11, 2001 4 jet airliners will be hijacked by terrorists connected with al Qaeda, a group based in Afghanistan led by a man named Osama Bin Laden. A few men per plane with box-cutters will take advantage of the standard policy to cooperate with hijackers. At 8:45AM American Airlines Flight 11 from Boston will be crashed into the World Trade Center north tower. On 11 the suspects are Waleed M. Alshehri, Wail Alshehri, Mohamed Atta, Abdulaziz Alomari and Satam Al Suqami. At 9:03AM United Flight 175 from Boston will hit the south tower. On 175 the suspects are Marwan Al Shehhi, Fayez Ahmed, Mohald Alshehri, Hamza Alghamdi and Ahmed Alghamdi. At 9:47AM American Airlines 77 will hit the Pentagon. On 77 the suspects are Khalid Al-Midhar, Majed Moqed, Nawaq Alhamzi, Salem Alhamzi and Hani Hanjour. At 10:05AM the WTC south will collapse killing thousands unable to get out fast enough through the broken building. At 10:10AM United Flight 93 will crash into the ground in Pennsylvania short of it's target, probably due to passengers or crew being notified of the fate of the other hijacked planes and fighting back. On 93 the suspects are Ahmed Alhaznawi, Ahmed Alnami, Ziad Jarrahi and Saeed Alghamdi. At 10:20AM WTC north will also collapse, killing more people. Over 4,000 will be killed overall. You know the events and you have time to plan and put yourself into a position to change the outcome and if not stop it at least reduce casualties. Good luck."
its like twister, see?
what would your 12 year old self tell you now?
for me he would either say
"Why don't you have a cool car?"
or
"remember how it sucked when mom would tell us something without a reason? Be sure your not making the same mistake."
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Don't ever let it out of your sight. You're gonna be rich with this.
And some day, some punk kid might show up and try to take it away. Don't let him.
And one more thing: it's "leave"! You make like a tree, and leave! You sound like an idiot when you say it wrong!
When you turn 20 and a hot red-head starts to flirt, run away! Run far-far away and NEVER EVER look back.
-and-
MTV will really suck in a few years, get used to it. (Since I was 12 in 1980)
My good sig is in the laundry
1. Hug your mom and tell her you love her. Now. Go do it now. (I would not tell me that it's my last chance).
2. Learn what studying means. Learn to do it, but don't let it take over your life.
3. Your first year in college you are going to meet a hot red head that shares the suite of the girl you are dating. _DO NOT DATE HER_. fnord She's a bitch. Everyone will know it but you. Prozac is not a _choice_. Do not pay for the sins of the father. fnord. You have been warned.
(1) Peter Pan is a fictional character. Setting up a sniper's nest in a tree with your father's crossbow will only get you a flu and a lot of funny looks.
(2) One year from now, when you tell your parents you want to be a girl, don't chicken out and say you were joking when they freak out.
(3) People are mostly nice, yes, but will get very treacherous whenever money becomes involved.
Live.
Don't be afraid to live.
Don't change a thing... if you do, you'll only make things tougher for yourself down the road. Besides, you'd probably end up with some 6-figure job and retire at 30... nothing to do for the rest of your life but but drive the kids to soccer practice and travel... eeesh... kill yourself now...
"Of course I'm wrong... That's how I get to 'right'." - Gil Grissom
Please, in the next 2 years read the following books:
- "Demian" by Hermann Hesse
- "Brave New World" by Aldous Huxley
- "The stranger" and "The fall" by Albert Camus
There's no point on fucking up your brain when you're 17/18, you could unlearn all the shit you've been taught sooner so it will hurt a bit less.
"urbazewski asks: "If you could send a message back to your nerdy unpopular 12 year old self, what would you say?"
Underwear goes on the inside!!!
Decide between Explorer or Mozilla/Netscape, do not code for both and if they give you trouble with it say that it would take 3 times longer, at least!!! Do not back down, don't worry. They will either accept it or you would be working in a much better place.
oh and...
Always make sure you have savings for at least 3 months rent and you will be all set.
Don't get pressured by women, just tell them you love them and don't get tired in explaing why it is too expensive...
don't try to stick out in basic training, its only six and a half weeks when you go through, in tech school, the class is going to be so much bs until block 3-6, and your going to alaska, deal with it. When you break up with "her" don't drink that night, its not good.
oh and mom's going to move to florida after you graduate highschool, you get the car and it throws a rod, make sure to dog eirik about it to the full extent...again:-D. DO NOT let eirik trade the mazda afterwards, tell him to get the jeep then.
"And The Geek Shall Inherit The Earth" --Jeff Darlington
As copyright owner of this comment, I authorize everyone to defeat any technological measure which limits access to it.
Get your GED and skip high school, and go straight to college. High school was an enormous waste of time. And yes, I'm one of that top 1% that could have went to college at age 12. I probably should have moved out of the house at that age and went to college. It would have saved me from alot of crap that happened in high school.
1) Watch Back to the Future II
2) The six regular numbers for Saturday's Lotto 6/49 jackpot are...
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
As opposed to finger condoms, which are technically known as "finger cots".
Wiseass.
1) Keep on truckin'! 20 years from now, youll be making $100K/yr in Chicago.
2) See 1.
Bowie J. Poag
thats what I would go back and tell you
I'd tell the 12-year old me the same thing that the 30-year old me told me when I was 12.
"You cannot simultaneously prevent and prepare for war." -- Albert Einstein
12yroldme: What the hell is the internet?
30yearoldme: It's kind of like a giant BBS, with unlimited porn.
12yearoldme: Mind if I take notes?
Sorry about that. The above post was mine.
Get your GED for highschool as soon as you can because highschool is worthless. o to community college and get your AA - transfer to state and work towards your BA.
Invest your savings in Ebay and Redhat not a car, then sell your stock January of 1998 and rebuy it January of 2003.
Live like a fat rat.
Ave Molech Setting
then join the Marines, become a Man, learn what life really is like and what you want, go reserve, go to college (and make sure you go to get EDUCATED, not for the letters after your name) avoid sluts the whole time, avoid slimy superiors so you won't get jaded and finally love yourself and your family going full circle as to why you joined the CORPS in the first place and thought an education was more important than stigma and degrees.
doctor. wait a minute, i'm starting to sound like my parents. oh no! i've turned into my parents.
on the serious side... i think i would tell myself to:
1) read the wall street journal everyday.
2) start lifting weights earlier in life (freshman year in college)
3) go to a college in or near a major u.s. city.
4) join the marines. after that, join the french foreign legion.
5) focus my energy
6) study
7) become a doctor or other high salaried professional
8) don't waste time downloading pr0n via modem (its much faster via broadband)
9) don't waste time or money binge drinking two or three times a week (as in college)
10) don't write poetry for women, it is a waste of time.
Why did I lurk so long before registering for a Slashdot account? I could have had a Slashdot ID of less than 100000.
Guys are too scared to ask out a chick who is smart. It's okay; if they aren't willing to ask, then they aren't worth dating.
(other people have said this, but it's a good idea): Take a martial art. I know the hick-ass town you live in probably doens't have anything. Get mom and dad to drive you far away if necessary. You end up liking kung fu, so maybe look for that, but if not, other kinds are probably good too.
Don't worry about girls. Honestly. Probably futile advice, but it's worth a shot.
However, if you still remember this when you're 17, then: yes, Katie likes you, yes, it's okay for you to like her too. Letting her know would be a good idea. She's not "the one", of course, but if you get some experience now, the better things will be later on.
If a certain friend of yours starts to turn into an asshole, don't bother trying to stay friends with them. There are cool people around, you already know some of them.
Other than that, have fun. Oh, and just after you turn 19, don't let your sister drive your car to Columbiana.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur.
Perhaps you'd also like my favorite derisive term, "fucknugget". Blah blah blah 20 seconds....
I wish I had some mod points to mod this up.
Get a motobike instead of an Apple ][c
Ciao, Valerio
still has 2-3 years left, sucks to be you.
And make Tim miss his flight.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Is "I didn't have enough random, pointless sex!" really the biggest regret you all have? Seriously, everyone's all "go fuck some fine ass bitches, yo!" I don't regret not picking up nasty diseases in high school at all, but hey, whatever sinks your canoe.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur.
nahh, southern california im afraid
Religion is a gateway psychosis. -- Dave Foley
What would I have wanted to know, and what would I have made use of? The most important thing:
Nevermind that you're technically in 6th grade, demand to tryout for the 7th grade basketball team. The administrators will understand you'll be screwed next year competing against the 8th graders (and thus on into high school), so they'll help you out.
That could have radically changed my life. On further thought, that wouldn't necessarily be for the better. Maybe I would answer all my programming questions and explain some basic comp-sci. But then, I gained a lot of my independance from figuring out programming on my own. It's probabally better the way things worked out. I would love to give my 12 year old self my portable CD player and my CD collection. If I could talk to my parents, I would tell them to get me a real piano teacher instead of the boob I was working with. Here's some advice for myself:
Kid, the adults around you are ignorant. Really, really ignorant about the things you care about. Don't worry when you feel dumb because other kids seem to know stuff. They just have access to better adults. But you're getting something better, independance and initiative. In a couple of years, you'll find a programming mentor. Then, when you get to college, you'll find that you don't really like answers with strings attached. Oh, and let me teach you a little something about Relativity so you don't feel stupid when you take your 6th grade science fair project to the local university and the helpful college students point out that you got it all wrong. Oh, and take these MindStorms for your robotics project next year that never gets farther than some circuit borads and blinking LEDs.
Damn. Couldn't help myself there at the end. Now, if I could go back and be my own Dad, well that would rock.
So I might be lying... It'll do the little tyke good to hear that from greatest authority on his future there is.
~ Nonsanity
... Kenner Star Wars action figures. ... Happy Days lunch kits. ... Dukes of Hazzard LCD watch.
Nope thats it, but about:foo doesn't produce the same result.
09f911029d74e35bd84156c5635688c0
If I tell you too much about your future, you won't become me.
The 32 year old you isn't perfect, made a lot of mistakes in life that he's learned from, and tries hard to be a good person. But, he's also happy.
If I tell you anything now that will change your future, you won't necessarily learn the same lessons, meet the same people, or do the same things.
So don't worry. You may not be happy with yourself for the moment, but one day you will be. And all you need to know is that there is such a thing as hope.
Enjoy life NOW. You are going to get very sick
at a young age and eventually die. Don't make
plans.
I knew I forgot to mention something....
Divert power to the reflector dish so we can create a tachyon field.
Thanks for reminding me
About 7% of the class said 'Enjoy yourself in high school because college is really hard.'
That's weird, I found the opposite to be true. High school kicked my ass with all boring classes like english, history, foreign language, etc. However, college was really easy and was actually interesting (I was a CEN major). And as for enjoying myself, I did much more of that in college.
Zoot!
-Learn C and get a decent assembler - BASIC and debug are not going to cut it
-Don't worry about the girl thing so much, but take opportunities as they arise
-You're not quite as smart as you think you are, but everybody else is actually as stupid as you suspect
sig fault
I'm sure I'll sound like a zealot, but it is hard to beat Open Source projects for accessible development experience. My younger self would get to see good code and bad and get experience solving real problems. Maybe I'd have even made a name for myself doing something and gotten a job that way. (Sure, its unlikely, but it could happen!)
And what's more: Nobody will ever have to know that I'm a younger guy. Everyone is faceless and ageless if they want to be.
On September 11, 2001, rise early and phone
in a bomb threat in the early a.m. Set fire
to some trash cans. Create a disturbance.
You'll be arrested, and have a different life,
but Dad will still be alive and can visit
you in jail.
but not nearly as much as in those magazines your older brother has.
You ignored your own advice. That or you told your self in another dimension.
I'm curious what religion you were raised in. Fanatical religion means different things to different people.
remember you are beautiful in each and every way.
(someone pass me a bucket)
"Always look over your shoulder because everyone is watching and plotting against you."
not everything has to be a pissing contest.
You don't need Geeksintraining if you're on Slashdot.
indeed
especially not me. ;-)
home page
You'll do some bad and you'll do some good. On the whole, just know that it'll all work out fine.
-Tom
-Tom
Or choose a midlife crisis wishing for that
same thing...
Considered harmful.
In fact, i think a message to my 12-year old self would have come a little bit too late. With some small changes, i mostly thought in the same lines then as now (15 in two months).
Now, if i could send a message to my [b]8-year old self[/b], that would be a completely other thing.
I think i would say just one tihng: Stop looking at yourself as a loser. You can do more than you think. Get out on the football pitch and play!
And a message that maybe would be more suited for my 12-year old self: Get rid of those glasses and get yourself contact lenses [b]now![/b]
I think that is the only things i would have said, but i think they could have changed quite a lot.
Ok, so I am not.
If advise could be in any form, it would be to enjoy my parents company while I still have them, stay away from the WTC on 9/11/01, and if I ever meet a girl named MJ, give her a kiss because she really would have kissed back.
This is not my sig
I'll stick with my top six:
1) No matter how much she begs, don't relent and agree go to [redacted]'s prom in 1992.
2) Get rid of your two best friends ASAP, they turn out to be backstabbers in 1996.
3) Ignore the bad advice of the broker that cost you much of your inheritance BEFORE the dot-com boom years. Buy these stocks in the early 90's: America Online, Yahoo, Iomega, and Microsoft.
4) Don't loan that counterfeit UPenn parking pass to ANYONE in 1994.
5) Don't waste time dating straight women, bisexual ones are SO much better!
Especially when it comes to getting a job and enjoying it.
Oh, and don't be an asshole and quit/get kicked out of your band in 1994. You guys will be great, and then you won't have to worry about getting a job.
Other than that, you'll do fine.
If I ran into my 12 year old self I'd probably say the same thing I say to the neighbor's kids now: "damn kids, stay out of my yard!".
I wouldn't say I'm a bad gambler but the last time I went to Vegas I even lost a buck on the soda machine.
put one condom on when you get up in the morning.
if you get into an "intimate" situation, add another.
stay away from powders, pills, and alchohol.
weed is not a problem.
disponibile
Stop doing that or you'll go blind!
PR
1. Don't take easy courses. You're paying those guys to teach you stuff; don't waste your time and money having them help you learn stuff you could learn easily enough on your own.
2. In college, don't major in what you think you want to do as a career. Major in something different that is peripherally related to what you think you want to do (and preferably harder, see #1). That way, when you eventually get around to what you really want to do, you'll already know a bunch of stuff that most people in that field don't know, and you'll pick up the stuff that everybody knows easily enough.
..and crime pays. Just ask a top manager at a Fortune 100...
Yeah I fucked up when I was a kid, but the things I have now, the friends I have, the job I have, the people I know and the memories I've shared, I don't want to lose that. Nothing could replace those memories.
Save your money, the Bush Recession is coming !
25% Funny, 25% Insightful, 25% Informative, 25% Troll
She's not really pregnant, and even if she was it probably wasn't yours 'cause she's a wh0re! Oh yeah, when they tell you that COBOL, mainframes and token ring networks are the wave of the future, don't fall for it!
DUDEEEE ;)
ur on Crack, FERRARI's ROCK more then Porsches
FERRARIIIII
WEAR SUNSCREEN!
A lot more guys should be listening to Tom. But his show is not available everywhere yet.
That's interesting. At age 16 I couldn't afford a car, but somehow I managed to have one available to drive all the time... and I never said I had a Mac in 1984. I said that's when they came out. And I still don't get why Wiggam needed to be such a twerp about it (prompting my rant)... how is it possibly an insult that someone wasn't a nerd?
I do not have a signature
...especially:
1-When they tell you you shouldn't or can't do something that you have great interest in.
2-When they say Apple ][e's are the wave of the future.
3-Because a school is a Private school doesn't mean that the students and the teachers are full of crap of the bull.
4-When it comes to advice on the people you date. They may not have the best relationship to start with.
5-When they tell you you have to work hard. Bullcrap! Live life and have fun!!! Work to live, not the other way around.
Dolemite
Save the World! Use a Quote!
Yes, you are! And the giver? WHO IS THE GIVER?
3) don't spend your life trying to please others...in the end, they won't be happy and neither will you
2) don't be so afraid of disappointing Mom and Dad that you don't enjoy your life. You could get convicted of setting an orphanage on fire and you'll still end up looking good compared to your sister
1) Memorial Day, 1991 -- Your Dad works for the National Guard and is golfing, NOT AT WORK, DUMBASS! Save us both the embarassment and lock the bedroom door....or at least put sheets on the bed first! And you have 4 years to think of a better lie than "I found the magazine out in the woods..." He won't believe you.
As you smoke that crack pipe, explaining your 12yearold self to not smoke the crack pipe, go remind 3DRealms that Project Managment Courses in college are a Good Thing(TM).
But I'm sure you already Gnu that.
"You know that girl that likes you, TALK TO HER YOU STUPID FUCK!"
Don't date the guy you meet your Senior Year of High School. He's so not worth it.
bwah-ha-ha-ha
you better learn to fix your car yourself. Otherwise you will be at the mercy of mechanics your whole life.
1) Most adults are as clueless as you are, so don't get too emotional about what they say.
2) Getting the best SAT score, going to the best college, and picking the a prestigious major is a waste of time. Those that fret over such things are living up to someone else's standards and not their own. Do what makes you happy, and you will be successful (at least to your own satisfaction).
3) Your life in school is about 1% reality and 99% fantasy. The responsibilities of school don't prepare you for the real world, but don't worry, as you'll learn what you need on your own.
4) Related to all the above: the best things you will learn are those you learn on your own. School, even through college, should be seen only as a guided introduction to that which lies beyond. If you rely only on coursework to teach you what you need, you will be lost in the real world.
5) Work in a shitty factory or labor-intensive job where the managers are jerks for at least one summer. That'll teach you just how valuable learning is.
Healthcare article at Kuro5hin
Your experiences and memories are perhaps the most precious things you have as they are one of the few things you cannot obtain later in life.
Start a diary. Get in the habit of recording things in it. Write about you think and do.
I'd say to myself: junior high will be hell, be prepared; high school will be much better, just work a little harder to improve those grades. And something else, when you turn 16 or 17 quit chasing that hot, apparently great girl and for Christ's sake dont blow off the rest, or you'll regret it later.
"Kill yourself now you piece of shit because you'll never amount to anything and your life will be full of missed opportunities!!! GET IT OVER WITH!!!!"
Fist + wall = bad future.
It's the BSOD preview/simulator.
It's what you can expect if you put Moz on your PC and run it.
(I saw the smiley, too bad the moderators didn't.)
Nope. Didn't see a computer until a couple of years later. TRS-80 I believe, then we got a used C64 at home. When I got to high school, started taking computer classes, programming BASIC on the TRS-80s. Then we got in the new 286s. Sweet.
I don't proclaim to be some uber-geek, I can swap "my first computer" stories, but they aren't that impressive. I didn't actually buy a computer myself until 1990 (3rd year of college), and that was a 386dx-33 for about $2200. My next computer was a P266. The one after that was an Athlon900. I was around the damn things all day, I didn't want to go home and mess with them. I had no desire to use them at home, until Linux came along. :-) Before that, anything I needed to do could be done at work.
Yeah, I know, there are people around here who probably built PDP-11s from spare parts around the house when they were 12, but not me. I didn't get into computers until high-school. I played a lot of Atari2600 and ColecoVision and visited one or both of the arcades that managed to stay in business in my home town. Computers were fringe, man. Why sit at home in front of a tiny screen when you could be at an arcade pumping in quarters, sneaking cigarettes, swearing at the games, and hanging out? I had Pac-Man fever. If you didn't grow up during that time, you just don't understand.
My beliefs do not require that you agree with them.
Do electronics instead of french.
Dear 12 year-old self,
Your life is about to be forever changed. You don't know it now, but in three years, you're going to be in millions of households world-wide.
Everywhere you go, people are going to scream at you that they hate you. Listen to this advice, 12 year-old self, because I know that nobody else is going to give it to you: whatever you do,don't listen to them, and let them define your sense of self-worth. It's going to hurt, a lot. You won't understand it, and you'll try really hard to convince them otherwise, but they will not listen . . . because they're just as insecure and confused as you are right now. You're going to want to quit the show, but if you do, you'll be 30 before you stop regretting it. Trust me on this one.
Stay on that show until it's over, and when you're older, you'll realize that for every person who screamed "I hate you," there is another who was quietly inspired by something you did. It all balances out, kid.
You are never going to be cool, no matter how hard you try, so save yourself the agony of trying to fit in. You end up marrying a real hottie who loves your inner geek.
And register wilwheaton.com before someone else picks it up.
OH! And when you're 22, and you're in a bar in New York, just say, "No, thank you." You'll understand why when the time comes.
http://www.mjyoung.net/time/index.htm. Live it.
"But pay attention on the sunscreen..."
"All I ever wanted was to see Larry Wall give Bill Gates a Perl necklace."
http://www.eisenschmidt.org/jweisen
Get out and see the world. Get as much sex as you can.
spend years (well little tiny bits over years) getting into character as poor rednecks before they win that big lottery ..... then they dump it into the stock market .... to close the story they show up while later and annouce how they lost it all nigerian money scams
You'll meet a girl when you're 24. DON'T MARRY HER!
But seriously, "You're doing okay and you'll get there. It's just going to take longer than you thought."
-Goran
Carpe Scrotum - The only way to deal with your competition.
I would tell myself a couple of things :
1) Don't worry too much about chasing after girls in high school, waste of time.
2) Study hard in High school
3) Study even harder in College
4) Be happy with yourself
5) Always follow through in your goals
6) Live life to its fullest potential
So people can say you had a happy life.
-- I wanna decide who lives and who dies - Crow T. Robot, MST3K
My advice would be to take the accounting and ecconomics electives in school which I avoided like the plague. When your software company becomes a success, you'll really wish you'd had some basic background in things which suddenly became very important.
then you'll be in good physical condition and can kick people's asses when they're snotty towards you, and make people fear you, which is a lot better than the reverse situation...
Also:
Get laid frequently. (Note: Requires the above to be done first, as well as most of the following...)
Don't settle for stupid jobs - work for yourself and make money for yourself, not other people.
CRAS - Calm, Relaxation, Awareness, Spirit.
As Crowley put it, "Do What Thou Wilt Shall Be The Whole of The Law" - or as Abbie Hoffman put it, "Do Your Thing And Only Your Thing"...
Remember - humans are stupid, ignorant, irrational, malicious, and fearful. Nothing they say or do (except physical assault) should be taken seriously.
No one can harm you unless you permit it.
You have a purpose in life and that purpose is to survive indefinitely, which has corollaries which must influence your thought and behavior.
Richard Steven Hack - This sig is TOO GODDAMN SHORT TO DO ANYTHING USEFUL WITH! MORONS!
I already came up with a policy to handle this ages ago:
1. Never argue with a version of yourself from a different time period.
2. If someone claiming to be you from the past comes along they are an imposter.
3. Dont listen to anything your future self tells you unless they tell you the password.
I think its important for everyone to have a time-travel policy in place.. always be prepared.
If I could tell my 12yo self anything I would say:
"Here are the results of every lottery draw from now until 2003"
This comment does not represent the views or opinions of the user.
I'll tell my young self about High School, college, being a virgin at my current age, living with parents, unemployment, George W. Bush... and a comedy "Seppuku" option.
Enjoy freedom before it's gone?
REMEMBER YAHOO YAHOO YAHOO!
1. Pay attention in math class
2. The super bowl champions from 1995-2003 are...
3. The powerball lottery numbers are:
4. Sell your shares in '98
5. Don't break your fathers speakers, you'll want to use them eventually god damn it!
Dont listen to them! They're out to double cross you! ITS A TRAP!!
What else can I say?
RIMMER: What about me? What happens to me?
LISTER: He can't hear us, Rimmer. He's from the future.
RIMMER: Ah, but if I ask you now, you can remember it, and when you get to be him, you can tell me.
RIMMER: Lister, it *has* happened. You can't change it, any more than you can change what you had for breakfast yesterday.
LISTER: Hey, it hasn't happened, has it? It has "will have going to have happened" happened, but it hasn't actually "happened" happened yet, actually.
RIMMER: Poppycock! It will be happened; it shall be going to be happening; it will be was an event that could will have been taken place in the future. Simple as that. Your bucket's been kicked, baby.
How should you deal with all those people who tell you that the next few years are the best years of your life?
Don't.
Pity these people. Their lives peaked at age 17. They may end up having another sixty meaningless years in their lives.
Make each year better than the last. Be a better person each year than the last. It's hard now. But when those other people are bogged down in despair over their lost youth, you'll be doing things you like and enjoying life.
Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachtani?
www.fogbound.net
Whatever it is you're doing, just keep
it up! Oh, and try not to be such an
asshole later on.
1) Learn how to learn well
2) Don't fear mistakes. There are some things you have to learn through your own experience. Get back on your feet and don't the same mistake ever again.
I believe that the most important skill that a 12-year-old (or any age for that matter) want is the ability to learn quickly and forget mistakes. If you're good at learning and keep trying, you become truly adaptive.
If I hadn't posted the parent comment, this would get +1 insightful.
High school is such a petty self-contained world, whether one loves or hates it. Yet by the time I learned to play the game well enough to suceed, it was already done. I had an epiphany during my senior year - that I would have been much better off not mastering the game and living for myself.
Warcraft and Diablo didn't help in the long run - perhaps if I had invested the time I spent playing Blizzard products in exploring the world my epiphany would have occured earlier.
And save the pain.
I want to delete my account but Slashdot doesn't allow it.
'When you're older don't go back and tell your 12-year-old self anything. Wait, is that a paradox?'
Buy shares in 1992. Sell in 1999. .txt file.
The winning lottery numbers for date xyz are abcdef
Horse abc won race nn at xyz on the xx/yy/zz
You are the new Nostradmus. Here's a
Don't buy DVD's or music! When you get older you can download them if you get a fast internet connection.
If you have a silly idea, write it down and mail it to yourself. That way if other people try to patent it you have proof that you had the idea first.
oh and lastly... your future wife is going to sleep with your best friend. Watch her finances like a hawk and chain the valuables to the floor. It gets messy, but you survive.
g'night folks
Heh. I got in some serious trouble with my mom if she found out I had been to the arcade (and I was the worst liar, so I always got busted), but not if I stayed at school and played in the computer lab. Besides the lab at school had a teletype that connected to a timeshare, so when it was time to go home, you got to take a printout of the session with you. Not that I wouldn't have traded that for some serious credits on a Defender machine, mind you.
;)
Now if only I could tell my 10/11-year-old self to save some of that stuff... then I'd have written proof what a pathetic nerd I was even then.
I do not have a signature
Rather than trying to contact my twelve year old self, I'm making every effort to contact my fifty year old self and get his advice.
No, Thursday's out. How about never - is never good for you?
2) Be absolutely indifferent...the more you want something, the less of a chance you're gonna get it...this _especially_ applies to women. Never EVER tell a woman how you truly feel, never put her on a pedastal, NEVER use the word "love"...just sorta shrug her off and tell her that _MAYBE_ you can spare some time for her. You'll have your hands full of phone numbers, promise.
3) Be CONFIDENT...that will get you everything you want in life.
4) The world is shallow. Appearances do matter. Deal with it as you see fit, but be prepared for the consequences.
Stop trying to be popular. If the cool kids don't relate to you it's not the end of the world. The kids who are like you are cool in their own way so just get to know them and that will get you through.
Just kidding hehe
damn it, that was my high school experience.
If I hadn't been such an idiot, I could have taken advantage of all those opportunities.
Never pass up a chance...
Wow. That's one of the worst "missed opportunities" stories I've ever heard. I weep for you, dude.
Here's my closest equivalent advice to myself:
When that hot little petite goth chick tells you that she wants your girlfriend, tell her to go for it. She's not kidding, and your girlfriend (now wife) has the hots for her too.
That would've been a hell of a scene.
-Cybrex
Boundless Expansion, Self-Transformation, Dynamic Optimism, Intelligent Technology, Spontaneous Order- BEST DO IT SO!
Don't wait to make the best decision of your life. Home School and don't let anyone in your way.
I think my favorite is "asshat." I don't know what it means (You wear an ass on your hat? For your hat? Someone else uses your ass for a hat? Your ass is shaped like a hat?) But it makes me giggle.
-If
I just thought of something, it could be a compound of "as shat." I don't know what that would mean, either. It's as if you were shat out of someone else? It's as if you had just shat?
Ugh, my head is swimming.
Run a pencil-and-paper RPG campaign with your far-off friends: Gametable!
Dear Self,
You are 12 years old now and are starting to feel deeply your own inner voice... listen to it! Your creativity is beginning is beginning to flourish so do anything, everything you can to express yourself. Take chances. Don't do it for anyone else, do it for yourself. And if someone happens to critisize you for having your head in the clouds, or being weird, don't listen to them! Follow this inner muse and you will be richly rewarded with a happy life and lots of money.
Your parents mean well, so try to understand that at least their heart is in the right place. If you strongly disagree with them, I suggest at the vert least you keep reserve that strength for yourself and not for battling your parents. It will only cause both you and them needless amounts of grief. Experiment and get away with what you can, and if you get caught, do your best to at least play the part of the "good son". They don't need to know everything you're up to, because you are a life long quest of exploration and adventure and the fun is only getting started.
Good luck, and may you reach the stars before I do.
You older self,
Paul
Planet P Blog
www.enthea.org
There may be some very bad things in your life, but being gay is not one of them. Agonizing about it now will only lead to suicide attempts, self-loathing, and the alienation of everyone who tries to befriend you. Mom and dad can cope and you'll be happier (and healthier!) when you find you can be true to yourself, not some f*cked up theories about gay people that you've read in misguided self-help books or seen on television.
And yes, I knew when I was twelve, and was already miserable about it. I made a lot of mistakes in my life, but this is the only one I'd want to change.
JOhn.
When your 17 stealing Dads credit card and driving to navada is a REALLY bad idea..oh and the HOT hooker will get you busted when she sees the credit card and knows dads name as one of her frequent customers...all I can say is...ewww. P.S. Kick dad in the balls for mom after you show her where he is hiding the rubbers in the car! Fun is coming soon...Al Gore invents the internet when your in your 20s.
Money is not important to me because it allows me to acquire material goods.
It's important to me because it maximizes my freedom.
Because of money (or rather a lack of it), I cannot go straight to grad school, cannot go snowboarding in Utah tomorrow, cannot take a trip to Tokyo, etc. etc. etc.
I accept that life is not about what you have. But it many ways it IS about what you can do and what you have done.
Maybe these people who win the Lottery don't realize this, and fritter away their cash on stuff instead of experiences.
Just a thought.
+++ATH0
Really... later you will become addicted to life, wondering if it can get any better. Trust me, it can't. And you'll be a stupid life-addict for the rest of your... er...
Stay interested in everything.
Take a Dale Carnegie class. It breaks you out of your shell and that hokum really works.
Always have a fallback plan.
Retain hope. Hard work may not seem to pay off but it produces luck as a side effect.
Put yourself in other peoples's shoes.
If your parents are true a-holes, get the hell away from them. Tell someone at school, tell the cops, do whatever you have to do. Look, no one has the right to beat you physically, even, beyond a certain bar, psychologically.
No, being abusive does not make your parents strict, but well-wishing good folks with your best interests in mind. You will be scarred for life, and I don't mean [necessarily] physically.
You will probably study harder and more effectively if you live without constant fear and punishment.
And, if you believe in any kind of religion, take it with a grain of salt - it may be a way to form social bonds, but beyond that, it is all about manipulation and profit. Yes, even that "god" shit they'll throw at you.
Ta, and good luck.
Let me say, high school and comparable schools, where a hell for me. Maybe you now all look at it with a glimmer of a smile. I still look at it with a tear in my eye.... The advice for my past self: Learn to keep yourself busy, prevent boredom. Ignore those that pick on you, better to ignore than to be hurt. Trust only that you can really trust, there are no such things as friends until proven. Buy a PC, best thing to keep boredom away, and to make friends.
The lottery numbers for 10 years in advance, then buy all the stock of Microsoft when I turned 18, then own EVERYTHING! Moohahahhhhh!!!
Just because you can mod me down, doesn't mean you're right. Shoes for industry!
Dear Me,
That toaster uses electric power indeed. No need to try it. Oh, and that girl you will meet on the music camp, make an impression on her - if not, she will fruitlessly (you will know what I mean later on) dominate the coming 10 years of your life.
And hit Save often while using Word. It will save you your education and career - don't forget that your memory has limutations. Limatations? Limmetations? Grr, I keep forgetting! Speaking of forgetting, stay out of the toaster!
Yours sincerely,
Niklas
22 year old me:
Hi, im you 10 years from now.
Screw nintendo games, play outside some more,and ask for a C or C++ program/compiler/books for xmas, qbasic will get you nowhere.
Also, screw the cool kids, most of them live in trailers now.
Hmm, dont F up college, do dumb stuff now so you wont do it later.
And quit worrying.
i use linux and windows oh god how can i have an opinion
That is what I would have done.
Also buy Compaq and Cisco. No, none of these companies exist yet, but watch for them. And plastics, don't forget plastics; Dow, DuPont, 3M, and Monsanto exist now. Starve if you have to. Re-invest the interest. [Hey, everybody gives this advice because it's good advice.]
*sigh* Ask Dad.
We have great parents, by the way. Listen to what they say. Be nice to them. Don't stop hugging them, ever, or you'll forget how.
You oblivious dork, Dad has a stack of Playboys, somewhere. Find them. One or two off the bottom, now and then, won't be noticed, or at least admitted to. Don't dink around with the National Geographics; go for the gold.
Anything that seems at all cool now, books, magazines, comics, toys, whatever, buy one to use and one to save. Don't even take the saved one out of the box or wrapper.
No, the Playboys aren't worth saving. Dispose of them discreetly, or give them back. Unwrinkled, untorn, certainly unstained.
You're a goof. Goof is good, folks like being entertained, but avoid weird.
Those cool books in the school library about chemistry magic with all the fireworks recipes? Steal them now. (One at a time, and leave another, similar book from Adam's Used Books on the table so you won't be noticed.) The librarians will throw them out within three years anyway, to keep them out of the hands of budding revolutionaries. Don't make a habit of this, but those three are worth the risk and guilt, and you will use them for good, not evil.
That stupid idea about using computers for animation? Not stupid.
But learn to draw first. You actually have a talent for it. Draw at least one picture every day. Start today.
History is cool.
Your textbooks are gap-filled, error-ridden and often lie outright; embarrass your teachers.
Hey, George Washington grew pot! The Constitution is written on hemp paper! Honest! Look it up!
Never, ever, stand by and let someone else get hazed or belittled.
Hit bullies back. Hard.
Learn to shoot.
Dump the dorky book bag and get a good briefcase.
Dump the slide rule; it will be utterly obsolete by the time you really need it. No, I swear. See the notes above about collectibles.
Dump the cheap polyester pants and shirts too. Admit it, you do know what looks good. Nothing to be ashamed of.
Get a haircut. Carry a comb. Your hair will never be neat, but you can keep it from getting all ratty and tangled.
Read the top of the mayonaise jar: KEEP COOL BUT DON'T FREEZE. Nevertheless:
Be bold with girls.
Know what color her eyes are before you speak to her the first time. Occasionally, drop a hint that shows you are paying attention: a favorite color, a favorite flower, a favorite song. No, don't make them yours. Just be sure she knows you are noticing hers. This will be hard for you, I know. Practice casually, so that you will be ready when you meet HER.
When you touch her, be certain that when she looks at you, you are staring straight into her eyes. Mean it. Don't flinch.
These can't be your only tricks. Think of others. And they're not tricks. Once again, mean it.
Never blame on malice what can be attributed to stupidity.
Take risks in public, but think them through and practice privately first, if possible. For really risky stuff, have a trusted buddy standing by when you practice.
When you are the trusted buddy, and things go badly, stick it out, stand by your man, take your lumps along with his.
Above all, remember: EVERYBODY MAKES MISTAKES. HORRIBLE ONES. They are too wrapped up in their own to worry much about yours. You are free.
In the wrong hands, sanity is a dangerous weapon.
Next year, when Camille drags you in her house, and goes to her room to change her clothes, FOLLOW HER. YOU IDIOT.
-- Two in the pink, one in the sink.
Well... he suggested putting the dick between two fingers and then moving your hand up and down really quick... causing the dick to go up and down (it's also loud because it keeps slapping against your stomach)
It works... and because of the motion it forces more blood into the dick... but it's not the best method... check out jackinworld.com... it's been a long time since I went to that site, but it's sort of a j/o how-to... I'm pretty sure the method I just described is listed there as a technique.
b/c after Jerry dies things just won't be the same
I'd send myself a list of all the disasters I could find, and tell myself to contact the appropriate people before it's too late. E.G. 9/11, Challenger o-ring problem, Bay bridge collapse during earthquake, etc.
Vote for Pedro
Ok my little child. You're going to enter the normal school. You're still in an age you're developing your brain, your intelligence and your skills. You'll find out that you are completely bored at school; you know how to read&write and basic mathematics, and that's what they will really teach you more or less until 12. Complain, fucking complain and don't let them bury your damn brain
Beat the shit out of the first person who fucks with you. Even if you lose, you'll have your self respect.
...then follow the advice.
Well said, BTW. Virtual mod point to you.
"Those who have never entered upon scientific pursuits know not a tithe of the poetry by which they are surrounded."
Tell your youngest aunt to get a breast exam regularly.
Tell your oldest aunt to make sure she has PAP smears regularly.
On a less serious note:
The Braves will win the Series before you turn 30, but I won't tell you when.
In two years you'll be a foot taller.
They clone a sheep one day.
The space shuttle blows up twice.
Move to Florida and vote.
It doesn't get better.
If people are to respect the law, perhaps the law should begin by respecting the people.
"Ignore everything your math teachers tell you for the next four years. They will destroy your love for math, and you'll spend your early twenties making up for it on your own. Especially ignore your high school calculus teacher, Ms. Albritton, who will tell you you will never make it anywhere in computer science."
Comment removed based on user account deletion
Looks like you missed out reading "The Teenagers Guide to the Real World"
:)
Based on your comment here it sounds like it still might help you make sense of the world.
Ghost Of Christmas Future Taunts Children With Visions Of PlayStation 5
Get to a 12 step Al-anon program and pay attention. Your parents can't take care of themselves, much less you. You're being used as a pawn in the battlefied of their relationship. Ignore what they think of you, pay attention to adults that support you and make you feel loved and wanted. Their opinion counts. Take thier advice.
The best way to do is to be.
Well, buy Microsoft, short Enron. You just started using Linux, but you'll be glad you did. The Internet is already starting to get big, but trust me, it will get bigger. Also, here's a copy of the SAT exam with answers for when you are a senior. Memorize. Oh, when that girl keeps hanging around you at the dance, for the love of god, dance with her. She obviously wants to. And when that other chick gives your friend her phone number to give to you, call her. Work harder in school. Don't worry, everything turns out reasonably OK.
Yeah, so you may not be happy forever, but at least you get a few years of bliss you might not have had otherwise. There's other ways of doing that too, but they all require personal change, which is hard to do (as opposed to sending messages back through time). And even after you've been disillusioned, you won't be bummed out about how much better things would be if you won the lottery.
"don't buy redhat at $300/share"
People who think they know everything really piss off those of us that actually do.
Don't waste your money on that copy of Windows 95. Get connected to the internet and download Linux instead and go buy a freakin book on C/C++, and learn it this time.
Oh, and forget about those NT classes, they're a waste of your time.
P.S. invest in... oh, hell, it doesn't matter.
Hmm. It points to some sort of built-in IE resource, rather than just the standard "about:..." blah blah blah.
Wonder what that's all about. Interesting, in some weird sort of way.
"Champagne for my real friends - and real pain for my sham friends!" http://ericblade.postalboard.com/
Mormonism got me too. Sucks, doesn't it?
at the end of the day when it IPOd.
one- That eating disorder you have next year? Don't bother, your metabolism is soaring, and anyway, you'll be roped into joining a wrestling team in a few years and will be more fit than you even want to think about. Get in that lunch line! Buy those Otis Spunkmeyer cookies! They don't have them where you're going... two- Andy doesn't like you. Don't ask him for his email address. three- you know those pants you like? the not-tapered ones? buy more, you feel like a geek cause you look like a geek. Don't worry about the glasses, they're actually good. four- Get your tonsils out now. Otherwise, you will develop staph, weaken your immune system, and get neuralgia in your throat. five- when you're with dad at Best Buy in Austin, don't go off on your own or scary groping men will scar you psychologically for awhile. six- don't bother reading David Copperfield. You test out of that class. seven- don't bother with sports at your second high school. they don't care about those with two x chromosomes. Just graduate early and get to college.
All I have to say is, I feel sooo sorry for you. That's like someone died.
More drugs. More wine. More women. Any time you think you shouldn't be doing something. Do it. Twice, if possible. 'Nuff said.
"Plastics" (Just kidding)
When I was about 13 (1952) my Electical
Engineer uncle suggested that a basic science
education was in order
think about
Was good advice
EOM.
1) Nobody can give you motivation except yourself, so don't join the Navy thinking they'll give you motivation. They'll give you pain, and you'll have to motivate yourself to get out of it!
2) Decide what you want and figure out how to get it, then get it. Don't decide what you want and then work your ass off creating a net for yourself to use if the main goal doesn't work out. You have to put everything you have into getting what you want, or else you won't get it.
3) Happiness is not something you get from money, fame, or drugs. It's something you give yourself. Smile, breathe, and be glad you're alive. It won't last very long.
4) You'll be able to use computers to get more porn than you even have time to look at. Stop wasting your money on those suck-ass Playboys!
5) Don't neglect your body. Exercise regularly, because it only sucks for the first couple weeks, and you'll be a lot happier in the long run. Chicks will dig you, you'll have more energy and self-confidence, and you'll be able to do more with your life, not less.
6) There is no 6).
7) You're allergic to cats. Move out of your parents' house and do not buy a pet.
8) You're allergic to cocaine. Avoid it, please.
9) Your parents mean well, but they don't know what's best for you. Think for yourself and make your own mistakes. It's the only way you'll learn.
10) When you're 33, and have ignored half of the advice I just gave you, write this list to yourself and send it back for you to read.
and fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.
Anonymous posts are filtered.
I know you can't afford it right now, but it'll pay for itself in the future. :)
'82, I was nine and hip deep in a C64. 3 brothers, and sisters, stay at home mom, No problem affording a C64. It was the "Family's" computer had Frogger, Jumpman, etc. Got it for XMAS one year, but I was the only one that understood the thing. (Mom actually was the first family hacker, she ported Miner from the PET to the C64)
It was maybe 3 hours before I had "my sister is stupid" repeating all over the screen.
www.jmagar.com
-
"OK, I can't, uh, stay long, so listen carefully: when you want discover time travel in the future, remember what I'm saying now, because without it, you'll never learn how. The important thing is:
"Life's a garden, DIG IT!!"
Then I would tell him not waste his life watching such a horrible movie.
Kind of like a 'wringing it out' method? That's just not right!
If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.
invest in computers in general! Imagine becoming like Bill Gates and getting rich off the things?
If somebody is planning to replicate the experiment, I wouldn't mind to be a lottery winner. All for science.
__
Men with no respect for life must never be allowed to control the ultimate instruments of death.
GW Bu
When you're 17 and your mom sends you out to 7-11 to get some last minute stuff for a party you're having for your friends, be sure to pay real close attention to that traffic light on the way home. And for God's sake, put your seatbelt on!
JoAnn
There is a cool site called slashdot. Go there, register, and be the first to post something about Natalie Portman with hot grits in her pants. Oh and while you're at it, think of a better sig.
PS: Don't buy that stupid 5.25" floppy drive, you moron!
PPS: Try not to get hit in the nuts so often. Ouch.
(I'm only 16, so there *was* a slashdot when I was 12.)
Ron Paul 2012
Self,
:(
This is a note from myself, from yourself in 17 years.
You are 12 years old now, hating 7th grade. Your teachers think you're a slacker, even though you try hard. You've already come to the realization that the "teachers pets" mysteriously do better, but you refuse to be one. "Hair" bands are in..
Over the next few years, things will change subtly. You'll be changing schools, and have a whole new set of friends.
My advise to self is:
* Enjoy the hair bands.. Get an electric guitar, and learn it well.
* That girl in band really is worth chasing after (not the one you hopelessly chased for years). She's more impressed by this kind of talent.
* Playing with computers like you are now *IS* productive. Keep it up. Continue learning everything you can about all aspects of it.
* Persue the girl in drama.. She really likes you. If you don't now, you'll never see her again.
* Don't date blondes. They're all nuts.. If you don't listen now, you'll seriously regret it in the mid 90's. This isn't a single warning. You'll be burned by no less than three of them before you're 30.
* Don't date girls who are obviously unstable. One of the most unstable ones, you'll start seeing next year. It'll be very obvious to you when she shows up to the school dance drunk, and tries to start a fight between you and the football team. Don't worry, they think she's nuts too.
* In 1991, you'll have a traumatic life changing event. Prepare to be self sufficent, and the pillar of the family. Everyone will be depending on you. You probably won't be ready, but you'll do fine.
* In 1992, when someone local gets internet connectivity, help him out. This will expand your knowlege tremendously. If you don't, you won't get another chance for years.
* Follow your gut instinct.. If anything in you questions being with someone, drop the relationship them. Trust me, it's for the best. You'll fail to do this a few times, and wish you hadn't.
* When you meet someone in mid 90's just after your divorce, you'll find out over the next year that you truly love her.. Don't ever let this love go away.. If you do, you'll regret it forever. While you're together, you'll feel on top of the world. It'll never get any better than this. You'll be with her on and off for years. If I knew how to make you stay with her, I'd be with her now.
* Think twice about questionable acts.. It may seem like fun, but you may get caught. Quite likely as a matter of fact.
* Drugs are good and fun.. Don't give in to the media's portrayal. They'll give you lots of enjoyment, and experiences with new friends. Save it for only weekends. Recreational use is fun. Habitual use isn't.
* Finally, put more of your ideas down on paper. Combine the ideas into books. When possible, make the inventions you're dreaming of.. Practice will let you make some really interesting things in the future.
Serious? Seriousness is well above my pay grade.
take every penny you have and buy corl at $2 in 1998. sell at $40 in 1999. short at $40 in 1999, and don't cover until it hits $1. in the mean time, take the profits and short everything tech in early april 2000.
very nice
why isn't this modded +5 yet?
dear god, its a deflector, not a reflector...
"Here's a sports almanac from 1995 to 2003..."
Did you ever notice that *nix doesn't even cover Linux?
This question is for the 40+ crowd out there:
What would you say to your 27 year old selfs?
-- Contradictions only exist in thought - not in reality.
i saw this porn one time when the chick was giving the guy a handjob... she kept twisting it and somehow, he enjoyed every minute of it... i just didn't understand... it's not made to twist.
please me, have no regrets.
I'd prefer to talk to the me in year 2 or year 3, so aged about 7 or 8. I'd like to say, "Okay, you're clever, don't stop being clever, but you know fuck all about the world. Don't learn it the hard way. Sure, in eight years you'll be able to stand up to the bullies, but now they're twice your size, and you'll never really fight them off. Don't be too different from everyone else, and don't be too blind or trusting."
But would this actually make a difference? Sure, it'd have made year 4 a whole lot less painful, but that was eight years ago. Would I be a better person if I hadn't gone through that?
I mean, I'd like the me from a week from now to pop back and tell me if I'll be successful with this chick on Monday. But, hey, is missing out on some wholesome rejection going to hurt me?
I'd like the me from six years from now to advise me on career choices, to tell me if I end up failing the rest of my GCSE's through laziness and working as a meat packer for the rest of my life. But if I knew I was going to do well, would I put in enough effort? Without going into a bunch of theories on time travel, would I fail because I was too sure I would succeed?
In my case, being picked on in primary school has made just enjoy taking the piss out of the even geekier kids (you know, the D table) - rejection never fails to get me moping around uselessly, and I've so far proved myself excellent at judging how much laziness I can get away with without actually getting low grades. So I guess, it probably would be good if I could travel back in time and tell myself all these things. Curse this stupid non-time travel age!
~~
Women are like Windows: You use it once, and realize there are far better replacements out there ;)
For me anyway. Keep doing what you're doing. Life doesn't get any better than being a 12 year old boy with a bike, friends, three squares a day, and absolutely no responsibility.
If there is a heaven, and I get to go, I'll be a twelve year old boy living in a perpetual summer.
Maybe they shouldn't be using it to acquire stuff...money can solve other problems that keep one from being as happy as one could be. Or at least, assuming those problems exist. If I won a lottery, I wouldn't stay where I am but just live in a better house and drive a better car...I'd be bumming around the planet, doing whatever my whimsy demanded. I'd use the money for VERBS, not for NOUNS!
Anyhow, as for what my 12 year old self would need to hear: Strangle the fuckers, and your troubles will end. Just remember, once they're gone (prison, dropped out, etc...), you will no longer be an outcast, so don't fucking act like it. >BITCHSLAP And lose some goddamn weight, fatass! You may be able to break any other 12 year old in half, but *I* have to live with those stretchmarks and back hair, dumbass! Oh yeah, and leave town the femtosecond you graduate. Alaska sucks balls.
Second, benzapp, sounds like Anomoly is more in tune with how to make himself happy and live his life by his own rules than you are. Everything he said is pretty much positive and looks forward to the next challenge. Sounds like your pissed about something, probably your misconceptions about a belief in God vs. religion.
Heaven will get damn boring? Ah... I think you should probably not be an idiot for your WHOLE life... the heaven promised by pretty much every religious text in the world (well... barring the cults...) promises total enlightenment and freedom. You'll know everything, be everything, probably a lot of other stuff we can't fathom. The alternative promises screaming and gnashing of teeth, true boredom, fear, an eternity of front row seats at an NSync concert.... *shudder*. You have to learn to separate the people who think they're religious with the message in the religion. It's usually the people that are fucked up.
I'm not trying to change your mind, I couldn't care less if you don't believe in God, the internet, or the availability of pop-tarts in your cupboard. I'm just pointing out that you pretty much jumped down Anomoly's throat because he's found meaning in something. That... well that's pathetic.
My cube. My friend. My solace. My prison.
I'll play along with you in this for a bit.
On what do you base your assertion that if there is a God he cares not for me?
On what do you base your assertion that my God is a fiction?
What evidence would be sufficient to prove to you that there is a God and that He loves you?
The God I worship is neither lonely nor helpless. He (for whatever reason) desires relationship with us. He doesn't need me. He doesn't need anyone. It's His grace that opens the door for us to have relationship with Him.
Life with Christ is real life. Real life is filled with both joy and pain. I do enjoy life - very much, but I recognize its limitations as well.
I'm wondering...what has God done to you to make you so angry with Him?
Respectfully,
Anomaly
But Herr Heisenberg, how does the electron know when I'm looking?
life is pretty fun as it is. not to mention odd and I think I would probably have turned out even more odd if I had voices telling me to or not to do things. especially if they claimed to be me. I mean I know the kinds of things I say to my self and things to do or not to do in the future isn't one of them. Besides I figure everything works out
Layow, From Total Ascendant So Such Guru King Uutont Fær Uulion the CookieMaker
Why do so many of the current replies to this topic reference drugs or drug usage, and why are these moderated as "funny"? Am I the only one here who has lost co-workers, friends and relatives to drugs and alcohol? Ok, twenty years ago I might have thought it was funny, but not any more. I've been to too many memorials -- I've had to bury friends who couldn't believe they were dying. And I was almost one of 'em, but that's another story and this isn't the forum.
The Russians have won. They have made the world a cesspool of distrust, greed, fear and hate.
How do you know? Isn't it possible (and even likely) that there are devices onboard every starship in the fleet that are called "reflectors"?
And even if they're located in the lavatory on deck 22 behind the jeffries tube and in the third stall from the back (the one with the door that won't stay locked and always seems to slip open right when you're "crowning") you damned good and well that someone, somewhere can get some tachyon streams flying out of them.
Star Trek writers don't need to make sense or be consistent. Just like Slashdot posters.
Appended to the end of comments you post. 120 chars.
There was this hot chick. Man, was she hot. For a time, she kind of liked me too. I would go back and tell myself to shtook her. That's pretty easy to do, especially since nerds are the most popular group of kids. And hell, my zits were real sexy.
you're gay.. get used to it.
.cig
12yroldme: What the hell is the internet?
"The internet is a place where people the world over come together to bitch about movies and share pornography" -- Holden MacNeil (sp?)
Anybody that doesn't remember the important quotes from Star Wars needs to have their H1-B revoked and a one way ticket home.
And yea, totally off topic.
What would I like to go back and tell my 12 year old self?
Every penny you can scrounge up, mow lawns for, beg borrow or steal : buy Microsoft and Dell stock. That is all.
Glonoinha the MebiByte Slayer
Hold it for 10 years, then sell. Put half the money in the bank and give the other half to that Linus guy. Learn unix, finish school, and girls who bite are more fun that those who don't - so ask them out and stop being such a pussy.
Tons. I'm not telling the whole world though.
Dear past self,
Now you're 12, I'd like to say this when you're 16 or at least 14 but that stupid slashdot thread wants it that way. So please write down what I'll say and pass it to you when you're 14. Thank you.
First, don't fucking ever again hear your father's raving about university. Do what YOU want, do computers or art, but for god's sake, NOT what they want. And if you go abroad, please, do what YOU want, not what they want.
And something else, stop stressing on high school about university marks,forget them. Don't pay any attention to what other kids say, you either STUDY or SHUT UP.
I want to study but never studied at that time, so please, DON'T study or DO study. I suggest don't study or university exams at all and go abroad at once high school is finished. that'll be better.
And remember, do what YOU want.
thanks.
"When that bully picks on you, punch him in the face as hard as you can."
(13) - I did! Then he picked me up by the neck with one hand (ala Vader) and flipped me onto the ground.
Turns out he would later be pro athlete.
"Don't let your boss walk all over you."
(26) - I did that too.. unfortunately no one's hiring now (tech or non tech) and it's bad with min wage places are throwing your app away.
If I knew a stable career path to take I would be content enough to start it now without the regret of not knowing it at 12.
more than human, less than God. ;)
*Chuckle*
While I appreciate your assessment of the above discussion, I far more appreciate your service to our country.
Particularly in this time of uncertainty and rampant terrorism, I appreciate a person who is willing to stand in harm's way to defend his fellow citizens - that's a lot more important than standing up for me in this piddly web forum.
Thanks.
Semper Fi, Marine!
But Herr Heisenberg, how does the electron know when I'm looking?
Advice to 12 year old me: Not one guy you ever date or look at will be worth getting up an hour and a half earlier for every morning. Put away the hair dryer, curling iron and leg warmers and get some sleep!
1). Stay in shape. A little exercise most days of the week thoughout your life will pay off in big ways. Don't jump rope barefoot on concrete, though, because you'll end up paying for that.
2). Once you start working, save a thousand or two a year throughout adolescence, 10-17% after that.
3). You CAN, CAN, CAN work in college and grad school. There's no need to take out loans! Try to work jobs that will allow you to meet intelligent people or cool people or a large number of girls.
4). When your CS professor tells you that this "C" language you've heard about probably isn't the next big thing, ignore him, but stay in the CS program and learn it. For God's sakes, do nothing more than MINOR in English! You can still have a soul and an intellect without majoring in the humanities! Oh, and find out what "the Internet" is. You'll be glad you did sooner rather than later.
5). Two dates to remember: December 8, 1980 and September 11, 2001, and here's what you can do about them....
6). You'll hate yourself for any "unrequited love" you ever have. Get laid in high school, and more so throughout your 20s! (But don't be stupid about it.)
7). That religious urge you might get in your early 20s? Don't let it consume and destroy your life.
8). No matter what may happen in life, remember that happiness is a choice and your thoughts are important. Keep looking for a book called "Learned Optimism."
9). Don't sell your comics at 18. You'll only get back into them two years later when "Watchmen" gets big.
10). Work more on your social life without worrying about being popular. Don't err on the side of caution when it comes to figuring out if she likes you! Oh, and the appearance of confidence (whether you're confident or not) is sexy; you'll find that confidence grows the more you, um, assume that virtue.
11). Stop waiting for the day you feel like a grown-up; grown-ups are just making it up as they go along. Seriously. In fact, don't get complacent about the world overall. There's nothing new under the sun, yes, but history keeps unfolding nevertheless.
12). Stop looking without for heroes and role models; you'll find you don't actually need them. Read "To Kill A Mockingbird" and reading DC comics. You'll find that's more than enough. It took this version of me until the age of 30 to get this.
13). See XTC in concert within the next 18 months.
14). Tell your uncle Brian to always use a condom, no matter what. In early 1986 you'll know whether or not this has made a difference.
15). Keep this note for when you're 22:
a. Compare using the Internet with the Macintosh way of doing things. Act on what you end up thinking.
b. register "business.com" and "drugs.com" ASAP.
--Kimota!
Who moderates the meta-moderators?
but i love nsync. i can't think of anything i could possible want more than to be in teh front row of an nsync concert... i want to go to hell!!!
"Stop talking for a second, sit down and listen to me for a second. One, pay attention to how you look. Those striped shirts look terrible. Buy what you really think you want to weat, and change your haircut. It sucks. Next, you're going to get into Magic in a little while. Remember that it's only a hobby. Take it from me - you are never, ever going to go pro like you want. Seriously. Take martial arts, you'll enjoy it. Finally, keep reading stuff, and don't take crap. See you in seven years."
Never drink anything you don't mix yourself. Never go to C.B.I.S., no matter who tells you what or why. Tell Nasa "never launch in Febuary" Kill Osama, now! PS Don't throw away that dumb geometry program.
I am the unwilling control for my Origin.
Enjoy Life! Here are some simple tips:
1. Slutty girls are like an amusement park with legs.
2. Never have sex without a condom.
3. Always have condoms.
4. Drink less in college.
5. Not necessarily less often - just less.
6. Red Bull gives you wings.
7. Red Bull and vodka gives you wings and harisma.
8. Forget Pascal and Basic. Learn C, C++, Smalltalk, Lisp, and SQL.
9. Learn Java - it's the money language.
10. Noone else's opinion matters. Believe in yourself.
Stop-Prism.org: Opt Out of Surveillance
buy the rights to lord of the rings. now.
1) DOn't spend 3 hours reading all the posts on this thread
2)
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Support Indy Music. Buy
1) Don't spend 3 hours reading all the posts on this thread
2) Don't date Ashliegh in grade 9, you are both too young to understand relationships. It will screw you over later on if you do.
3)Date crystal and don't go to germany
4)if you go to germany, kill yourself there, it will save you the pain of everyone else afterward
5)When the doctor gives you the red pills, don't take them, they will make oyu get dumber
6)Marijuana is good. Discover it soon.
7)It is only after oyu have lost everything, you are free to do anything
-------
Support Indy Music. Buy
because it could turn out very badly...
Don't spend $70 on each Final Fantasy game when you can check out the vastly superior stories and music it ripped off from the library. For free. Since you don't have the attention span for Tolkien and Beethoven, at least check out some movies. For free.
Oh, don't wait for anime to become popular. Just watch it now while you're still amazed by it. By the time you're my age, your standards wiill be so impossibly high that nothing will impress you anymore.
She's nucking futz.
Wu-Tang Name: Half-Cut Skeleton Get your own Wu-Na
I wholeheartedly agree with you that we can have a great time here on earth.
I differ with you in this: You seem to assert salvation on the basis of a moral life.
Moral compared to what? On what do you base your Christianity? Some of the things that you suggest above don't appear to me to be consistent with what the Bible says.
The essence of the core teachings of Christianity is that we are unable to live a moral life. We are imperfect, and God's standard is perfection.
The only reason that anyone has hope of being accepted by God is because of Christ's perfect life, and his substitutionary death.
The leaders of the Jewish faith were very good people. They measured every action they took in light of what God might think about it. In spite of this overwhelming morality Christ described their moral life this way.
"Your righteousness is like filthy rags"
You are like "whitewashed sepulchres" beautiful on the outside and dead on the inside!
I can be the nicest guy in the world, and do good deeds all of the time, but that's simply not enough. There's no way I could do enough good to be found acceptable before God. I can't be perfect no matter what I do.
Christianity is the only religion in the world that's not about what I can do but rather is about what God already did for me and everyone else who will take advantage of it. I for one am very thankful for that.
Respectfully,
Anomaly
But Herr Heisenberg, how does the electron know when I'm looking?
Cheers,
- RLJ
kidding, kidding! love the sig.
In about a year, you're going to be almost as big as I am, and you'll never have to worry about being beaten up again.
The flute player you're going to meet in marching band in a couple of years is cute and interesting, but she's never going to be hot for you and you're just going to drive her nuts.
Oh, and there's going to be this canoe trip in about seven years. Don't be too thick to realize that your date really likes you.
Make me aerodynamic in the evening air
Stop them.
Don't worry about yourself: You turn out fine, and your mistakes are ones you can learn from; if I tell you how to avoid them, you'll be less prepared for what comes next.
yea that girl, you still regret loosing to this day, your not that old still but its been years and you still think and dream about her.
ah well....
FEAR NOTHING
"No matter what you do you'll still be around 30 years from now,"
he said paradoxically
Use your head, can't you, use your head,
You're on earth, there's no cure for that - S. Beckett
Yeah, you might get fosterized and not make it to college but you'll have a lot more self-esteem.
I feel fantastic, and I'm still alive.
chief (v.) - to smoke weed
ex. i'm chiefin on this spliff.
i would have told myself to smoke more dope in highschool, becuase now i'm trying to make up for it in college and its hurting my studies
lose != loose
Speak for yourselves. I am a Marine, which makes me more than human, less than God. ;)
What is with military freaks posting on slashdot lately. Dude, you are as blind to the truth as any other Christian. I got news for you, the military serves the same purpose as religion, to keep people content as slaves and to maintain the social order. Schools were created to make you WANT the very life of taking orders you now live.
That is not life. Free men don't take orders from anyway, supernatural or otherwise.
You'll know everything, be everything, probably a lot of other stuff we can't fathom.
What you don't realize is that is not fun. That is fun for someone who watches TV all day want wants to be in the TV program. Life is about the struggle, constant improvement, striving to make each day better than the last. Human life is incompatible with infinite existence, and would lose its meaning otherwise.
The alternative promises screaming and gnashing of teeth, true boredom, fear, an eternity of front row seats at an NSync concert.... *shudder*.
You obviously have had a hard time creating your own meaning in life. Its easy to understand. Schools were created to train people to crave the direction of leaders and to feel empty without someone telling them what to do. You joined the military to avoid this reality you abhor. A free man would not give a fuck about that shit, and realize his life is very short, there are a lot of books to read, many paintings to paint, and songs to be performed. Boredom never existed until the first batch of schooled nitwits were released in the world. Boredom is what a slave feels when he is not being told what to do.
I'm just pointing out that you pretty much jumped down Anomoly's throat because he's found meaning in something.
Thats not meaning. Thats an insult. Life is not meant to worship. Thats was Roman emperors wanted. That is a life for slaves.
That... well that's pathetic.
I find nothing pathetic about trying to open the eyes of someone blinded by deceit. That is a human life out there, wasting a way not much greater than an animal. Instead of kidding myself that a warrior caste is necessary to protect the people, I try to give mindless drones their lives back. Maybe I don't always succeed, but I sure as hell try. Thats life.
Anyway, have fun slaughtering the innocent citizens of Iraq.
I don't read or respond to AC posts
1) Pay more attention in Math classes.
2) Practice guitar more
3) Register a good domain name before 1993.
4) Save a LOT of money for the VA Research IPO and see when it hits $300.
5) Ask Tracy out when you meet her.
Particularly in this time of uncertainty and rampant terrorism, I appreciate a person who is willing to stand in harm's way to defend his fellow citizens .
So, not afraid are we?
I am sure your God will be rejoicing at the coming bloodshed.
I am sure he realizes quite fully that the Infidel has no right to exist, let alone in the Promised Land. The coming slaughter shall be a sacrifice! Tribute to the glory of god!
I don't read or respond to AC posts
"acquire every copy of X-Men #94 you can find, preserve them all in comic bags, and sell when they hit $200"
That's a 800:1 return that a 12-year-old can invest in, one quarter at a time.
There are certainly better investments, but none that would have motivated me as much.
Buy lots of Bre-X stock, but sell it all before March 19th. Add a little Apple and some Microsoft to the mix as well.
1) Put the bong down and back away slowly. Never, ever pick it back up again.
2) Do your damn homework. Getting into a good college is going to require more than a 1380 on your SAT's.
3) There's going to be a brunette with an amazing body and deep green eyes. Stay away from her and UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES ARE YOU TO MARRY HER!
4) When you get your first road bike buy a good radar detector. Never, ever just don't show up for a speeding ticket. If you don't show, the next time you get popped for 120mph on the Banfield they're going to give you some shiny bracelets and a ride downtown and you'll learn all about "Bench Warrants", "Bail Bondsmen" and "Lawyers".
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety" - BF
"and one more thing. After you sell, then buy something called 'Microsoft'. Trust me on this. You'll know what the hell I'm talking about then."
The two statements "this is what I'd tell myself" and "this is what I should tell my kids" are closely related. Here's mine:
:)
:)
High school is prison. The inmates are savages. And it's absolutely nothing like the outside. This is what the Lord of the Flies is about. (btw, read it now, before they make you)
You're smart. Study psychology. It'll give you great insight as to how to socialize yourself, not to mention explain the behaviour of your peers.
Bit of useful psychology #1: when you're depressed, you're mean to yourself, and when you're hard on yourself, you're hard on others. Take a hard good look at the mean people around you.
Bit of useful psychology #2: people hate having their bubbles burst. Keep this in mind while exercising #1. This is a great way to make enemies.
If you haven't already, learn how to make friends. Use this knowledge to realize when other, more outgoing people are trying to make friends with you. It's a skill that you'll need throughout your life.
Don't be afraid to make friends with geeks, especially when she's as pretty as Megan B was.
Learn to be a good lover. This might not win you points with the popular girls in high school (see that bit about how HS is not real life), but for the most part they're stupid and shallow anyway. Following this path will ensure that your every possible sexual fantasy is fulfilled. It worked for me.
"No problem. I have the capacity to do infinite work so long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero."-Dilbert
keep doing what your doing. if you change a thing, you wouldn't be who you are today, for better or worse.
If I could tell my 12-year old self something, I'd tell him (me.. whatever..) to take up some type of buddhism (my_pref = theravada) and find a dedicated monastery to meditate in.
Seriously. I never attempted suicide, but kids humiliated and ostracized me so bad that once I thought I was going to *die*. I don't mean that I wished I was dead (though I did that a LOT..) I mean I woke up one day and I was *absolutely*sure* it was my last day alive. I was scared, and sad, but I was finally going to be allowed to stop hurting and so I didnt tell anyone. (un)Fortunately, I lived.
So I'd advise either buddhism or a massive, Massive, MASSIVE dose of heroin (i.e. suicide). Since the latter would cause a paradox.. aww fuck it. I'd just convince myself to put my head in the oven and to fuck with the space-time continuum.
I should point out that my life is now "on track", but it'll never, ever be worth the suffering unless A) I get put into an android body and live forever, and spend forever banging my Christina Applegate and Gillian Anderson androids while on "android Ecstasy", or B) God's plan involves me helping make the world a better place to the point that human evil and suffering is all but nullified/wiped out.
I'm hoping for A) and working on B). I find both extremely unlikely, but I haven't made a sleeping-pill margherita yet... not yet.
And if I could put a bullet through my 12-yr old self's head, or better, introduce mom and dad to a local abortion clinic or *duh!* condoms, well that would be just f*cking dandy.
Oh did I mention I was a nerd in grade school? And that I had wet dreams of going Columbine style on my peers asses long before Columbine made the news?
I hate the system. That's why I love democracy; it allows for peaceful change (at least theoretically). Until the new world order, anyway.
Then you just get electroshock until you promise not to burden others with your troubles unless you paying a therapist.
blah blah blah... everybody hurts. I'm not special.
just my worthless 0.000000000002 cents so kill me
Steve, don't eat so much!
no need to knife somebody, you'll just have juvee on your record forever.
:)-~
Heres what you do. What I wish I did.
Take Karate (or Judo or Kung fu... tai-kwan-do is flashy but you're less likely to stop a serious ass kicking with it until you've mastered it.. take judo or kung fu first.)
Not only will you be able to *block* that punch sailing toward your face (or nutsack) but you'll have the inner confidence to stare that fat sack of sh*t down, thus avoiding most fights (true for most but not all places, some guys will try to kick your ass just because you're a "karate kid" or whatever... THAT's who you knife.. but i digress)
So yeah, take karate. Train every day, even when class is not in session. Work on your form and technique, speed and strength will follow. And someday when that ex-jock turned crackhead tries to mug you and your fiance, you can handle yourself with confidence. Yeah you might still end up losing some dough but you're a lot more likely to keep a cool head, and thus reduce the chances of getting shot/strangled/or worse.
Oh another thing, self, when girls try to kiss/hug/talk to you, let them!! even if you feel wierd. Being a 24 year old virgin sucks a lot more than the "butterflies in the stomach" feeling, trust me.
Ignore public-school teachers, except the exceptional ones (you'll recognize them when you meet them). Teachers lie like motherfuckers. Except math and physics teachers, they rul0r.
Oh one last thing, wait until junior year of college to try weed, it'll be easier not to spend *ALL* your free time and $$ taking bong hits... 'cause you'll prioritize graduating above ganja. Hopefully
when she tries to get rid of: ..the Tonka trucks, throw a tantrum. ..the baseball cards, bite her on the hand (be sure to draw blood, maybe take a finger off.) ..the Transformers, kill her and run to canada (bring the transformers, fucktard!)
duh....
You'll get a roommate in a few years named Steve Tripp. Kill him. Kill him in the most heinous way you know how. Then bury the body and piss on the grave.
And, oh yeah, even though you will contemplate suicide for the next 10 years because you're such a dork, you'll get over it, find a gorgeous girl who will fall madly in love with you, and bear your children. But you'll still be a dork--but a rich dork with a hot wife.
On second thought, I think I'll just pass on the time travel thingy and go play some Counterstrike.
1 - First of all if you are geek at 12, there is a 90% chance you will be at 17. 2 - If you are a geek at 17, there is a 99% chance you will be in college. 3 - If you don't already, work out and play sports (even if you suck). 4 - If you suck at your chosen sport, choose to be the meanest bastard on the field or ice. Get penalties. It's better to be the guy who is too much of a penalty liability than the guy who falls down when someone looks at him. 5 ---- ALL OF YOU SLASHDOT GUYS NEED TO LEARN THIS ONE ---- My dad always told me... ask 10 women to fuck and 1 will say yes. It's good advice and it is true.
Wrong:
>>2. Girls are not worth your time. They are fun while you have them but man you regret it when they are gone. Plus, after you have one, you're hooked.
#Life lived alone is not worth living. you will think about suicide almost as often as sex if you can't relate and fear the girls. GET A DATE! kiss her and bring her roses.
>>5. Listen to your father, play cards more often with your father, go out and play sports more with your father. When you leave for university, you'll really miss the few good times you did have with him.
#Ignore your alchoholic father, he's an immature retard and will teach you nothing about life, except self pity. Disown him now instead of waiting until you're 21. he's a loser.
7. Star Trek is not as cool as you think it is.
#ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE?!?!?!
9. Get rid of your damn huge glasses, and get smaller ones or contacts.
#Do whatever suits you. If people make fun of you (and they will) then spit in their eye. you may get beat up... try peeing in their apple-juice when they turn their back next time. or just choke them out in the lunch room, you'll have everyones respect then (except the staff).
Right: the other stuff.
Addition: don't smoke pot until you're hanging out with a girl who smokes... youre less likely to make it a habit, and you'll have more fun. unfortunately she might get you high then rob you, but its worth getting laid as long as the condom dont break. try acid ONCE. mushrooms are okay if you do it less than once every 3 months. NEVER DO COKE (and crack/heroin just go without saying).
Addition 2: If you can't get laid, try to make it to third or at least second base. intimate human contact is VERY IMPORTANT and you can always masturbate if you don't go "all the way", but FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, swap some spit before college is over or you'll regret it FOREVER. never ignore your own standards though. chubby is OK but ugly will haunt your dreams till you die.
Right on.
translation for -my- 12 year old self:
commit suicide NOW, 'cause you'll never get any. And forget about getting a hooker, even a pricey one is just masturbation. you'll still feel empty the next day.
Since your parents failed to teach you how to deal with life, and hence the opposite sex, you might as well tie a plastic bag around your neck and save yourself the agony of high school.
Trust me, these ARE the best years of your life, so since you're already wishing you were dead, take my advice and make it happen.(make sure you're above the 8th floor if you do the concrete dive, and make sure you land on your head... being paralyzed sucks even more than what you're going through even if you can't belive it.)
Alternately, start doing lots of drugs and join a gang. Your life will be hell when your 30 but youll probly get to fuck some aids infested slut while shes tight (but dont rape, thats bad).
kill yourself.
Anyway, if you're smart, you've learned from your mistakes. Taking those mistakes away would also take away the critical lessons you've learned, and you'd just end up making a similar mistake later on.
And even if you're talking to a modern-day 12 year old, as opposed to your past self, most kids will only learn the important lessons by making their own mistakes. Some things you've just got to experience in order to fully understand.
It's sorta like, "Don't touch that oven. It's pretty fucking hot."
"Oww!!"
"Told ya."
I hate you >:|
you can probably kick my weeny butt...
I still hate you.
Be nicer to people, especially those that you consider unimportant now. Some of them will be very important to you in the future, and by then it will be too late.
But her sister does!
I would tell myself, listen to your eldars. They have seen more and know more. They've learned from their own mistakes and the mistakes of others. Even your parents are too young.
Everyone makes mistakes.
You are smart, but also a fool - don't get proud.
Pursue the truth with all your heart, don't settle for a lie just because it's easier.
There's no one type of personality that is the best - there is a diversity, so appreciate it.
Always question and try to understand.
---------
In many ways, I would be afraid to offer myself advice. I could say what I said above, but I learned these lessons anyway. How can I be certain I would learn them at all if I told myself? We cannot predict what other mistakes we'd make and what other lessons we'd miss if we gave ourselves advice. I have made many mistakes, made myself the fool many times, and done wretched things - yet they all work towards good. My Lord Jesus instructed us that we would be persecuted, yet through evil we would be transformed into something good. Day by day I try to come closer to Him, to be more righteous like Him. So I cannot completely despise the evil things that have happened to me, but instead rejoice in them because bring me closer to Him.
Something that took me way too long to figure out.
Girls want to have sex almost as badly as you do. You just have to give them an excuse to do it.
If electricity is produced by electrons is morality produced by morons?
get around to learning a programming language
get to know your brother really well, he won't be around for much longer.
try to have as much fun as you can without killing yourself or others.
try to avoid the golf course in june of the next year. or just remember to stand AWAY from people then they are swinging.
take up martial arts. it looks really cool but i'm too lazy to actully do it.
start learning spanish now.
apperiate people more. you aren't going to be here forever.
don't be so shy. people will think you are stuck up.
speak louder.
be with friends more.
if something is really important to you do it! i can't guarentee that your going to make it past 14, i'm still waiting for the answer on that one.
don't be afraid to ask girls out. some will say no but some will say yes. even if only one person says yes she will be totally worth it.
live you life to the fullest.
I think I'd tell myself that most people realize Pat Robertson really is a fool. That would give me a extra whole decade to see God as something good instead of an just excuse for slime-balls to steal from the sick and elderly (and scare 12 year olds).
Hey self, you're not gonna really KNOW God until God decides its time for you be ready and able to... its all according to God's plan anyway.
Don't worry about going to hell because you masturbated, hell is just a recent fabrication in the greater scheme of things. Religion is a way to discuss God... religion is not God. only God is God.
Dont be stress your own mortality when your grandpa dies.
God is everything everywhere.
As long as you do what you feel in your heart to be right, you;ll find that you worry less about whether you should know God through Jesus, Moses, Mohammed, or whatever. God is there... trust in God.
It's OK, even when it hurts. which it often will.
btw, I believe in God but not in life after death. aint i kwazy?
Totally.
... i don't know what advice to give you.. move to a more liberal state, study law and run for president in 2028? Be careful though, MLK didnt exatly die of leukemia *cough*
Teachers, counsellors, principals, the T.V., are just trying to make it less expensive to operate the public schools so theres more $ for the beauracrats and politicians to imbezzle.
Human nature is to look out for #1; everyone assumes that if you tell a kid not to fight it will prevent them from constantly fighting but they'll still stand up for themself. This is because most adults are IGNORANT MORONS and stuck in the "father knows best" mindset that propagates like a STD.
Kids who try are under too much pressure to be "good" get fucked. forever. Dont be the antichrist but fuck "good".
good call, go psycho on that bully. In fact since youre under 18, I highly suggest going Kaiser Sozhe on his family too. Don't kill anyone (lets be realistic here) but DO burn their house down.
I bet bully-boy's dad is going to have some stern questions for him along the lines of "Son, why did timmy burn down our house? did you say or do anything that might have ticked him off? like maybe humiliating him in front of the whole school, or beating him up for no reason?"
If your family gets sued just say Beavis said it was cool. That always works.. the courts are simply jizzing in their pants to find a reason to censor everything.
Note: this advice comes from a white boy... I don't know if the dynamic would work for my African American brothers. Especially in texas/alabamy/florida/etc you might just get killed outright.. the kkk still exists out there
Don't trust Bubbles, and don't let your brother loan out the PS2 and Games to him.
When the high school is in a lock down right before lunch, complain and they will let you ('cause of the diabetes) go home.
Use the diabetes exscuse anywhere and everywhere it seems approprate(when in college it means priority registration because it is classified as a disability).
Eat extra the night on May 30, 1997, and some days in the spring of your senior year in high school 'cause convulsions due to the diabetes suck.
Practice more on your trumpet, try and become 1st chair before your senior year in high school because everyone else quit.
Offer to drive your grandparents to the casino in after Papa locks the keys in the trunk especially in Aug 2002. (Paradoxish alert)
The normal go to dances, dance, party with people, be social, ect, stuff.
It's old news, but high schools and colleges are largely mechanical institutions which process children (an infinitely renewable resource). Anyone who isn't "in charge" is expendable. Students are 'transients,' unlikely to be remembered and consequently of little importance. And most of the "knowedge" your teachers present will be proven wrong before you get your first full-time job. So, ask first, what can this place do best for me? and how do I get that to happen? In high school, that means launching you as soon as possible into a college suited first to your personality, and second to your career goal of the moment. If you can move along in tow years, do it! Explore all the fields that interest -- music, art, sports (if geeks are permitted in your school), and join the Debate Society. Adult Life is largely argument, so get good at it now. What colleges do best is get you ready to be found by life -- so make friends in the job placement offices in your first semester -- they "guard the gates" to the best summer internships and the best job interviews. Who knows you is more important than what you know. Ask second, what will this place do worst for me? And how do I avoid that? Mostly high school damage is done by mindless "tracking" into well-worn academic ruts and living with idiots too long. 90% of teachers boast SAT scores in the bottom 20% of their college class as of 1970 (bottom 10% in 1990)(source -- The College Board ). Go make friends with someone with a broader point of view than your own. Keep in mind that ability plus obedience make you no more than a tool for someone else's ambition, so don't value too highly the phony value of engineering and science -- all technology is disposable and very few technologists establish stable careers without becoming managers. Those who do can always get a Pakistani to do your job for 30% of your salary. Lastly, the Cardinal's Rule --The appearance of competence creates the obligation to perform. Unless you really want to be one who fixes the stuff everyone in your live messes up, be careful about showing off your knowledge. Tech support sucks!
A wise man once said - "hold to that which is
difficult". Or, dont take the easy roads in life.
Take risks, fail, recover, take more risks.
When you get to 55, you will thank me.
As I write this, there are 1372 comments on this topic! Forgive me if you think this is trite - it is not intended that way: There are lots of hurting little boys and girls in these supremely confident /. uber-geeks.
I think the huge number of responses speaks to the universal nature of regret and the enormous effects of childhood on adults' emotional lives.
Rather than spending time with "what-ifs" why not turn this exercise into something that can actually do some good?
Project yourself as a 70-year-old and give yourself some advice right now! Forgive yourself for your mistakes. Everybody makes mistakes. Start over today and make a fresh start. Begin with the end in mind.
If you are trapped by your past (and all of us are, to some extent) go to a therapist and get help working that out. Don't be defined by your past, what others thought of you, or what others have done to you. Rather define yourself as you aspire to be, not what you're telling yourself you are.
Finally, set your goals and shoot for the moon.
Yes, it's a blog. Sorry if that offends you.
Never turn down pussy.
Why do you assume that all /. readers were nerdy 12 year olds ?
;)
What about the 'well balanced' people, probably making up 60% of any given population ?
Or don't they count ?
A slashdotting - you get the stick first and then the carrot !
Buy the following domain names:
o rg
.. you know, a thing on your desk that you move a virtual "cursor" on your screen to "point" to the objects on the "Windows" interface.
microsoft.com
google.com
yahoo.com
slashdot.
jeff.com
(I will leave apple alone)
And copyright "Windows" as an idea for a "Graphical Interface" where the users click on pictures of what they want to see.
Oh -- and never forget about copyrighting the idea for the "Pointer"
- - - - - - -
Orppf urp mf y.ppcxn. yflcbi otcnnov C am yflcbi yr n.apb Ekrpatv (Dvorak -> Qwerty)
contract clause for season 3+ of the show:
2 episodes to be written by a hugo or nebular award winning author with final script approval. 15%+ of the spoken words to be your character.
any technology in the episodes must have been established in a previous episode, that is, nothing new gets invented, sheilds don't get remodulated to repel the particle of the week.
Bitch!
Dear 12yr old me,
Don't refuse when your parents want you to take piano lessons. Do something musical. Join a band.
I started playing guitar at 20 years old, and if I would have started at, say, 15-16, my whole high school experience would have been different. Playing guitar would have been easier if I had done what my parents said and taken piano lessons.
I have a job, money, and comfort right now, but the only thing that makes me truly happy is playing music (guitar). And it could have gotten me laid more...
this sig is a highly rehearsed improvisation
this thread, and the replies to it, is the best thing I've read on Slashdot, ever.
-Rain'
Sounds like you are an anarchist (www.anarchyfaq.com). I am very sympathising of that philosophy but I can't entirely agree. However, I gree with you 100% about school - it is a tool to brainwash us - see my section on school at http://tyreth.homelinux.org (excuse the server speed it's a p133 with 32mb ram running apache+sql+php). However, to be a freeman I don't agree requires us to be free from taking orders from anyone. I am a slave to Christ but a freeman in the world. If I weren't a slave to Christ I'd be a slave to this world and it's pursuits - whether I live in anarchism, capitalism, communism, or dictatorship.
What you don't realize is that is not fun. That is fun for someone who watches TV all day want wants to be in the TV program. Life is about the struggle, constant improvement, striving to make each day better than the last. Human life is incompatible with infinite existence, and would lose its meaning otherwise.
Agreed again. In heaven we won't know everything despite the parent post. That is absurd. But we will be without sin and evil. There will be challenges aplenty, and the joy of learning and sharing without evil. We will be able to spend eternity learning and exploring the mysteries of the universe and of God - but now we must deal with betrayal, violence, and much more. In the afterlife we will have the freedom to work together to reach out to the stars, so to speak. Something that can never happen this life (one reason I reject anarchism and I'm sure you'll disagree, I once did).
Thats not meaning. Thats an insult. Life is not meant to worship. Thats was Roman emperors wanted. That is a life for slaves.
It was a result of christianity that slavery was abolished (admittedly not completed even today). Your argument is empty. Christianity was rejected and illegal by the Romans well before it was the state religion. Nero the emperor used to burn Christians alive and kill them. This is definately not a religion created by any government as a tool, either by the Roman empire or the Jews who wanted to overthrow the Romans.
Anyway, have fun slaughtering the innocent citizens of Iraq.
I take it you are a pacifist. I abhor the idea of this Iraq war, but I do believe in the possibility of a just war - but not this one. Not yet. I would feel duty bound to oppose Hitler though I would be scared to kill and be killed. Yet the service it does to free those Jews and Christians would be for it, to defend the innocent and stop the aggressor.
Stop using freaken IE!
on your 18th birthday play the lotto w/ these numbers (forgot them, but I assume I would look them up) . . . then buy a lot of AOL . . . Time Warner . . . Yahoo . . . Ebay . . . Etoys Get out on Jan 1, 2000 . . . and have fun w/ a couple billion dollars
I really don't want to think of all of the changes that might have happened had I not done what I've done. Granted I've made some mistakes, but I've grown from them. If I were to change anything in the past, no matter how minute, it would completely change who and what I am right now. That IS NOT what I would want. I like who I am for the first time in a long time. I'm at peace for the first time in a long time. And I'm completely head over heals in love with a member of the opposite sex, who I doubt I would have met had anything been changed.
I like and love where I am now. Nothing needs to be changed. Nothing.
Stay physically active, and even though the high school has killer donuts and fried burritos, don't eat too many. Don't start smoking, or you will waste an amazing amount of money before you stop. And don't have sex until you really understand that the things Daddy did before he stopped drinking WEREN'T YOUR FAULT!
Even though the greasers will accept you, don't hang out with them. In 1975 or so find a game called Dungeons and Dragons, by TSR games. You'll love it, and the smart kids will really like you.
Learn more math - your 8th grade math teacher will give you books and help, take advantage of it. Play with the analytic geometry you found in the encyclopedia you just found, it is a blast.
Make an effort even for dumb classes, and apply for scholarships. Don't skip PE or refuse to dress down. Major in math unless you can find a Computer Science program in the late 70's. You will really have fun with both math and computers. You will also love teaching, and are very good at it.
Don't expect to find your soulmate until you are in your early 40s. He's not even born yet.
It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows. - Epictetus
Stay in school, but studdie subjects that _you_ want. If you get good at whats burning for you, if its playing guitar or hacking kernelcode, do that.. When you know something by hart, you will be good at it, and you will earn money. Simple as that.
Other advice, take some time off to do something fun, you will have alot more money later.. but _alot_ less time for yourself (working is actualy called that couse you are working all day) =)
Three things which would change my life:
...but your technique sucks. You're a friggin' nomad. You don't have time for them to realize how much they like you. Go for the prize.
1)Relax. Grades really are as useless as you think they are.
2)Don't get into OS/2. That turns out to be a very expensive mistake.
3)Oh yeah, you know that chick? Go for it.
And the bonus...Remember that you are an athiest and an outsider/nomad. You don't hold the same ethics as the rest of them. Question everything. Question Everyone. Trust nobody. Believe me or not, and if they're talking to you and don't usually, they're probably trying to manipulate you. Don't be so naieve.
There. Happy?
It's been a long time.
Maybe I'd include something more spiritually meaningful in my message, but you can be sure I'd include a couple of lottery numbers!
If a train station is a place where a train stops, what's a workstation?
They don't have bathrooms on Star Trek, you idiot! Have you ever seen one?
Whenever you have to go, sensors detect it, and beam the pee and p000p out of you.
The only place anyone ever even sees p00p anymore is on the holodeck when holo-Seven p00ps on your chest.
"Has [being a kidnapped teenage girl, raped repeatedly for months] changed you?" - Katie Couric to Elizabeth Smart
"You'll know everything, be everything, probably a lot of other stuff we can't fathom."
I find this thread very interesting. I don't believe in heaven etc., but I don't think I'd like to "know everything, be everything" because for me the pleasure is learning and becoming.
graspee
my ideas on advice are pretty similar to yours.
"You're going to screw up. A lot. So don't worry about it. Just take it when it comes and learn from it. Also- you're reasonably smart and reasonably talented. Do what embarrasses you, show off your talents and your smarts. Win or lose, you'll feel better about yourself for having tried. And if those around you give you shit for it, find new people to be around."
I'm only 20, and only recently coming to some personal realizations that are truly life-altering, and, I think, improving. Whether by bearing witness or by being told, lessons can only be imparted when the recipient is willing to accept and to process the information. "Be self-confident" is meaningless until you know what it truly is to be confident. Even then, hearing the message is not enough to grok it.
"Oh, and one more thing, 12 year old self: get into this thread on slashdot earlier."
*honk*
This is my sig. It's prescription, I swear. I need it for reading things... on the other side of things
I'd tell myself your reading disabilities are caused by nighttime dust allergies giving you crappy sleep. Don't become a vegitarian or you will lose your gallbladder. Learn to play piano/keyboard and draw. STAY AWAY FROM COMPUTERS AND ELECTRONICS UNTIL THE 80386 COMES OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, me, I know you miss Thailand, and I know you're just dealing with the first year of really starting to explore the boys and girls your age.
/everyone/ when you know you're right.
/LOVE/ the internet. And the console games are going to be so pretty... aw, here, play some Soul Calibur. I've got some time to spare...
1. Don't doubt for a second your sexuality is perfectly valid. People are people; knocking half the human race off the list of people you can love IS just as stupid as you think it is now. Five years from now what started as a one-night stand will turn into a love that will make those years worth it. Yes, you WILL get laid again, so relax.
2. Junior High and High School will be awful, socially. Spend your time cultivating real friends. Enjoy idiosyncracies in others. And not that I'd need to tell you this, but avoid drugs.
3. Exercise. Get back into running and waterfall climbing.
4. Keep writing. Oh god, keep writing. The more you write, the better it gets, and you don't want to wait 9 more years to get back to where you'll be at fourteen!
5. Don't commit any crimes, even the ones you think you can get away with. You'll eventually get caught, and while not as bad as your parents threaten, it's still not fun.
6. Don't work construction labor as a summer job. It will wreck your feet and leave you in pain for years to come.
7. Dermatologist visits. Remember those sunburns in Thailand? Right. And brush your teeth twice daily.
8. Most of all, believe in your convictions. Stand up to your parents when you know you're right. Stand up to
9. Oh god, you're going to
"To pass through the jungle; silence, courtesy, ferocity, as the occasion demands." -- Kamau, "Proper Passage"
Hey kid, don't give unsolicited advice. Only losers give unsolicited advice.
...as an alternative title to the artcle
you may find the Higgs in this signature.
That includes your teeth
I'd recognize my 12 year old self by the fear in my eyes, the doubts about the future and his place in it. At times, what lay ahead looked like little more than dust and ashes, scorched earth after a terrifying moment of nuclear holocaust. Despite all the signs leading to perdition, he still held out hope. But was it too much to ask for a small sign?
Would he recognize me? He'd no doubt ask me what to tell him what he was thinking of - a secret password only known to himself and (hopefully) his future self. I'd have to tell him that 30 years is a long time, that some things just slip away from you. He'd have to accept that it was enough for me to be there, pulled through the tesseract.
Even at 12, I think he'd see our father's profile and know the cadence in my speech. He'd know me just the same way that, looking at him, my younger self, I'd see the reflection of my own sons.
There would be no questions about stock, bonds or assasination attempts. He knows that I'm was already bending the rules, giving him this small glimpse into the future. Paradoxes be damned, I owed myself something, promised myself that if there were some way to make contact, I'd do it. Like Houdini or Lazarus, come back by way of science and magic. There was only one thing he really wants to know.
"Is there a future?"
"Is there a place for me in it?"
A normal life, with bills to pay and teething children, someone to love and someone who loved me. Family and friends, grief and pain. Something other than the oblivion of a nuclear rain.
I wouldn't even have to answer him. He'd know, seeing me standing there. He'd know enough that he could ignore those doomsayers, and slip into bed at the end of the day, gentle into that dark night, knowing that there was a tomorrow.
So cheers to us, one and all, who have made it this far. A moment of silence, perhaps, for the dear friends and family we've lost along the way.
My Grandmother said to me: "Never chase after a bus or a girl: There will be another one coming along soon"
This explains why a significant portion of my teen years were spent standing next to deserted bus stops, in the pissing rain, and with a raging hard-on."
T&K.
Political language
...remember the tooth young Leto...
"It's here, but no one wants it." - The Sugar Speaker
God takes pleasure in the repentance of a sinner - one who promises to Him to change from evil to do good, rather than the death of one. I have no idea why you even said this.
Even if I did think He would rejoice, why would your comments make me feel bad about it? How would it pursuade me that His rejoicing in it is wrong. How could you even accuse God of wrong? If He does wrong, then He must by definition not be all powerful and therefore not God.
And sell soon as it hit its high, then enjoy your vacation =)
I tell the kid to make sure he spends less time on the computer and more time chasing girls!
I had a computer in 1981 and I was neither rich or a college kid. I was 13 and bought the computer with money I had saved from washing cars for used car dealers. For the record it was an Ohio Scientific Instruments C1P - a 6502 based model with 4kb of RAM.
All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.
I was 12 in 1964. My advice? "There's this eight-year-old kid in Seattle named Gates. Find him. Become his friend. He will be very, very good to you."
[this
"do the best you can." corny... every 12 year old hears this a million times a day...
and
"if you're reading this, you can safely ignore #8, as it probably doesn't apply to you." of course it doesn't apply to the kid following your advice, he'd be in an elderly home at age 12...
PjotrP
C64 Assembler... you'll buy it anyway in two years and those two year were lost.
Don't be so afraid of other people's opinions of you... after you leave that school in 3-4 years, you will never again see 99% of them; trust me, I've been there. If there's a stand that should be taken, take it. If there's a girl you want to know better, let her know!
--LP
Study more math. It will be a LOT more important than you think.
No it isn't. If it were it would have more funding.
Nerd: Derogatory term typically directed at anybody with a lower Slashdot ID than you.
The Young self will do what the LAST self to come back said, and the loop gets TERMINATED.
-Flies eat flesh.
Emacs is good operating system, but it has one flaw: Its text editor could be better.
I've read /. for years, and I read it mostly for the articles because there is good info that can be found. After I found that I posted 4 articles and they didn't get accepted but later published under something someone else said (totally twisting the whole thing...you know, like big media)...then having my posts here deleted (and I'm expecting this one to get nuked too) I have a hard time understanding how something like THIS gets posted. It doesn't really have anything to do with.....well, anything. It basically wasted my time reading it. I stopped coming to /. cause of things like this (and of course because of my shit getting burned because I'm not sucking one of the "posters" peckers)...oh, can't forget the misleading they're doing like big media either.
/. how it can talk about being a geek and.....you know....screw that
/. shit whining
/. nuke me or ban me for saying that, I don't care....logs speak volumes and I've been keeping them all. Keep it up and I WILL be posting them. Just remember that next time you nuke "anon" posts. DHCP and a large network is a wonderful thing.
I have a hard time understanding...knowing and seeing what I have from
I was a VERY popular person. I was a guitarist, had long hard, I had girls after me all the time. I still do. If you think because you're into computers that doesn't happen.....get out more. I can do anymore most of you do and STILL get laid by the hot chicks. I'm tired of this
btw,
I would advice myself to read as much as I can. And I mean read good literature, not magazines or comics.
By the time you become adult you'll be too busy with your life to enjoy reading.
Mahovik
Corduroy is not in style. Wait a few years, and get the stuff that is more conducive to rennaisance faires. Don't worry, you don't have to wear tights.
Get a different pair of frames for your glasses. Plastic is OK, but see if you can twist Grandma's arm into getting those newfangled titanium alloy frames that Marchon is starting to make. Yeah, they're expensive, but you're not gonna break them.
That persistent cough you get every winter AND every summer? That's a result of a combination of allergies and cigarette smoke. Try and avoid smokers if possible. If you can't, have patience, they'll make smoking indoors illegal in a few years.
Don't get too heavy into learning Apple BASIC. It's gonna ruin your ability to code properly and you'll come out of it with some bad habits. You know, like not commenting your code when you learn this newfangled language called C. Forget wanting to learn Cobol or Fortran, there's no decent future in them.
Above all, you're not a nerd, you're a geek. Geeks will rule the world. Revel in that.
This sig no verb.
I would tell my 12yo self "in a year or so your mom will ask you if it would be ok with you to get a divore from your dad, tell her no."
Be Yourself and SHOW IT. Yeah you might dissapoint many people, some will think you're fucked up, most will reject you. However, the most interesting people you'll find will like you that way. There's no need on pleasing anyone: two or three really close people you can be completely sincere with and trust is most than anything you can find in life...
when linux is better than windows on the desktop, i will use that... until then i will continue to use teh best browser for windows (IE)... either that or until i get enough money to buy that mac that i've always wanted...
please me, have no regrets.
"When she looks like she is trying to do the prime factorization of an odd, five digit number in her head keep doing exactly what you are doing."
-Peter
With no karma bonus because of how offtopic we are.
Here's the product link without a ref
Here's the product link with a ref
If you roll over the links, you can see the difference.
I don't think people make a whole lot of money off of them. Some sites, like Techbargains probably do.
To register for Amazon's program, go to associates.amazon.com for their "associate" program. That's what they actually call it.
El Karma: excelente(principalmente la suma de moderación hecha a los comentarios de los usuarios)
Back when I was 12, I wouldn't listento anybody!
I don't think I would have listened to myself.
Basically stuff to give me the hope I didn't have.
Sigh.
Posted anonymously for obvious reasons.
Its bad now, and its going to carry on being bad for about the next two years. Then it gets better. And it carries on getting better. Hang in there kid.
PS, the trick with girls is Stop Trying Too Hard. But I don't think your ready to hear that yet.
Paul.
You are lost in a twisty maze of little standards, all different.
in my case, at least. I was too introverted as a child, and by the age of 12 it was too late to do anything about it. What I've often thought about doing, though, is living my childhood over knowing what I know now. Then I'd have the foresight and the willpower to take better care of myself physically, be more sociable, be nicer to my siblings, maybe make some good investments, and I'd know exactly who I should be chasing after in high school. ;-)
Hopefully, with the wealth of a couple of Bill Gates, I will be able to find the generosity to do something interesting with it as David Brin suggests.
Start working towards what you want to do after high school now, so you can use that as an excuse for not getting married and joining the US Navy soon after graduation.
1.) question everything. question the motivations for the actions of others. even try to answer other people's questions with POIGNIENT questions. "why?" without being annoying will help you understand a great deal.
2.) be more observant. you're introverted. that's good, it means you think for yourself. but pay attention to others around you as people too. also, pay attention to nature and the stars. enjoy dawns and sunsets. follow the phases of the moon. learn to identify constellations.
3.) your parents are human. they like most humans only do things right about 50% of the time. so listen to them, but think critically about what they say. your actions are your own. also, they're not mind-readers any more than you are; you have to constantly communicate with them and remind them of the problems you need them to handle. if you don't tell them how things really are, they're going to create an imaginary version in their head that you don't want to deal with.
4.) you have ADD. it's really just a mix between having a natural curiosity and starving intellect that public school suppresses and the heavy expectations your parents put on your achievement within a stupid grading system. but having a prescription for aderall now is way better than having a prescription for IBD later. aderall will help you stay up to finish stupid school work, and since you don't REALLY need it, is an excellent schoolyard source of income. you'll need income because your parents are cheap, and it will teach you much about street education and socialization.
5.) if someone is going out of their way to tell you something, it's for THEIR benefit, not YOURS. thus explains advertising. what's obvious is rarely what it seems.
6.) play chess and go as much as possible. teach other kids how to play; it's not as stereotypically dorky as you think. you can play chess with your dad, and no one on the schoolyard knows what go is let alone has any preconcieved notions about it. it will help you understand strategy and the world much better.
7.) get outside and explore. don't listen to your mom about boundaries. go as far as your bicycle will take you. explore the creeks and waterways. explore downtown. explore the town over. dive into dumpsters of telcos. practice grafitti art in out of the way places. explore backyards and look into beigeboxing. ride the trains just to see where they go and to get a handle on how the routes work. know the land.
8.) do more with your apple ][e than just play video games. don't listen to mom about how it's for her to write her book, she'll never finish it anyway. keep reminding dad to get a 2400baud modem, he eventually will to use for his doctorate degree. when he does, don't listen to him about how the internet is hard to use, he just doesn't want to take the time to learn. get a shell account. read usenet. keep your eyes peeled for this thing called the world wide web and especially registering domain names. the more you can pick up about unix, networks, and computers now, the better your opportunities will be to work with computers for benefits of more than just the cash kind in the future. also if you hear about an "internet service provider" apply to work for one, or start one of your own as soon as possible.
9.) explore every avenue of school options. don't just follow the expected path. talk with teachers after school. look up the details of homeschooling (and don't listen to what your parents think it is, it's really just a loophole to get you out of organized school). talk with the vocational department, you could get out of part of school for doing work even for a company you "created".
10.) libraries and (photo)copyshops rock. you don't realize just how much can be done in a library. anything that can't be done in a library can be done in a copyshop.
11.) other than your dad and yourself, no one expects the level of detail, quality, and perfection that you're capable of producing. try to align your schoolwork with your independent interests, but otherwise don't spend more time than necessary on schoolwork irregardless of what your parents say.
12.) quit tae kwon do, swimming, and all that crap. your dad is trying to make you more manly/athletic but doesn't know how because you don't like team sports. insist on learning aikido and keeping your membership at the YMCA to lift weights. you want to lift weights as boring as it is because being stronger will make everyday life way easier and girls will want you. aikido will help you to understand the nature of conflict and how to defend yourself against assholes. you should know running away and telling someone never works.
13.) your anxiety is limiting you. be brave and challenge those anxiety situations. namely, don't be a pussy about the possibility of getting hurt. being hurt isn't bad and is rarely permanent; and go up and just talk to those girls as regular human beings. girls don't belong on a pedistal and they don't know what to do or say any better than you do. but the sooner you get to be friends with girls, the sooner you'll understand how to be in sexual relationships with girls. and sex is very very good.
14.) start masturbating if you haven't already. puberty, sex, and gratification are all good things.
15.) nothing is set in stone; everything is up for negotiation. if you don't like something, at least attempt to change the circumstances or terms of the arrangement. it's better to try and fail than not try at all.
16.) read books. you think you hate reading because of the crap the school has you read. check out neal stephenson, william gibson, robert a. heinlein, j.d. salinger, thoreau, george orwell, and philosophy by nietzsche, foucoult, and even 'the art of war'.
17.) listen to music. beethoven, mozart, and tschaikovsky are amazing. so are pink floyd, the doors, led zeppelin. hang out at small music stores and keep an eye on independent hip hop and electronic music labels like warp, mowax, and ninjatune. also, play with midi, video-cds, and any other media tools you can; use this to get out of stupid music class. maybe even learn to play the piano instead of the violin, and actually learn how to read sheetmusic.
18.) don't be afraid of drugs. don't start doing drugs, but if someone asks you to hold their cigarette it's more about proving you don't give a shit what other people do than it is about evil chemicals. also, pay attention to what's in over the counter medications at cvs and what natural herbs (especially in asian markets) can do.
19.) don't just go along with whatever your friends are doing. they only half know what they're doing, and it's mostly self-indulgent. if they're doing something you're interested in, do it; but otherwise have the balls to say "this is boring, i'm out" and leave.
20.) develop your own sense of style. for socializing, it's easier to do cool shit and have people drawn to you than it is to be a follower of someone else. being a follower has a lower barrier of entry, but being yourself is alot more fun.
21.) clothing. stop wearing underwear. if you mom says this is weird, ask why she feels free to piss with the bathroom door open. stop buying clothes bought at the mall. buy your clothes from small stores downtown or develop some style from the salvation army.
22.) you'd be amazed at what can be accomplished over the phone. check out radioshack and build yourself a redbox. if you need to make long-distance phonecalls, look into beigeboxing. social engineering is a good skill to master.
23.) relax but be focused. if anyone tries to give you shit, be smart and play it off like it's not a big deal, because 99.9% of the time it's not a big deal, though the other person may not see it that way. be smart and find a way to sidestep the issue or resolve the larger issue.
24.) the teachers in school don't give a shit about you. they most certainly don't know best. think critically about what they say just as you need to about what everyone says.
25.) don't get concerned with material possessions the way your mom does. the less stuff you have the better, but the more things you can do the better. typically a computer is the only luxury you need. however your parents in an attempt to both be cheap and limit your power will be extremely frugal with what they give you, so learn to be independent in terms of income and use that to extend your freedom.
26.) have the korean kids in the neighborhood teach you how to speak and write korean, and how to prepare the kickass food their family makes. work out a way to give them things or teach them skills they need in return.
I'd send myself a tarball of mirror of http://fastseduction.com and tell to read it through.
Orion, there are some things your future self wants you to know. From 2003 to 1980.
#1 Learn all you can about computers. I know you are doing this, but once IBM comes out with a computer, learn what you can about it. Look at a company named Microsoft, consider investing in it and sell by the year 1999 no matter what happens.
#2 When you go into the adolecent mental ward, don't be afraid to show your feelings towards Tawnie. When she goes back to Morris or tries to, tell her that you love her and see how that goes. This should come up in about 1982.
#3 Avoid eating snacks when you can, eat more vegtables and fruit, that way I can avoid having the weight problem that I have.
#4 Always go to church, usually the 11 am mass, you will meet your future wife there. Exchange phone numbers, take it slow, things will work out as they worked out for me.
#5 Try not to get so worried or upset, you'll just end up back in the hospital again. Keep taking your medicine and don't miss any appointments with the doctor.
#6 In 1985 you will meet some new friends in a new high school, take the deseg program that will take you into the city. One of your friends is named Mike, keep in contact with him. Whatever you do, don't leave him alone on May 31, 1999, get friends to help if possible. If he has a shotgun, take it away from him. Keep the alchahol away from him too.
#7 Tell your grandfather you were named after to get his postrate checked, he has cancer. If he takes too long, they won't be able to save him. Tell your other grandfather that you love him, and you want him to excercise more. He has a weak heart and will die in 1983 unless something is done. In my time, both my grandfathers died, one after the other.
#8 Don't go to Rolla, go to the Community College first, get an associates degree, and then go to Rolla or UMSL. Study hard, no parties, you can socialize, but sdon't get into heavy drinking. That will be your downfall if you get into drinking. Once I gave that up, life was a lot better.
#9 Exercise when you can, do a few pushups, or situps. Use your brother's weight bench. Do this at least for 15 minutes a day. You should get into better shape.
#10 Whatever you do, don't panic. Keep a level head and think about things before you do them. Each discusion you make will effect the outcome of your life.
Belive me or not, I am you, just in the future.
Remember, Slashdot does not have a -1 disagree moderation, and no, troll, flamebait, and overrated are not substitutes.
Life will suck for you around this time. Don't worry about it. Tough it out, but don't become extremely reclusive.
Your teachers at school will not help. Don't even try asking for them since they're more worried about keeping their jobs.
There are people in your life who do not want you to succeed. Ignore them. Only one will turn out to do something with their life. Stick to your principles. There are more assholes than good people in the world. Your job is to meet more good people. Unfortunately, you don't meet a lot of them until you reach high school.
Listen to your parents. As a matter of fact, you won't be listening to them when you are 21, like I am.
Don't give up piano. Continue to nurture your love of math and science. You will be asked if you like girls or books better repeatedly. Choose books. Girls aren't worth your time at that age. All of them at your school conspire against you, and you meet a few really nice ones in university. One will fall in love with you.
Ignore TV stereotypes. Fitting in is a waste of time. Create your own identity, but don't identify yourself with any mental trauma you experienced or you will become an excessively bitter person. Introversion is a good thing.
Challenge authority frequently. Don't subvert the chain of command, but do not be afraid to assert yourself. Do not wait to be screwed over in grade 12 to begin to get pissed off.
Keep that journal of your thoughts. Show it to no one. It will maintain your sanity.
If it sounds like I'm bitter, its because hindsight is 20/20 and I made mistakes I shouldn't have.
Dad will tell you that "you come first. no one else." Believe him. You will aspire to become him when you are my age.
Signed,
A 21 year old Quantum Skyline
Hey, 12 year old, listen good:
1) Get away from Transformers, Optimus Prime never got laid, except that one time, but it was a fluke.
2) Get rid of that Poindexter haircut and don't be afraid to tell girls you like them.
3) You did GREAT by staying away from drugs, alcohol, and other bad things, mkay.
4) Oh, this is really important, Missy and her sister will play 'Spin The Bottle'. When your friend leaves with you three together, don't freak out and leave, stay and have fun. You won't get this chance again for 5 more years.
5) FINISH COLLEGE!!!! I cannot stress this enough. You will want to move out of your mother's home to be independent, DON'T! When you get that computer, study the HELL out of it and stay in school. When you get your degree you'll be better set in the workplace. Don't worry, you still do good, but you can't break past the glass ceiling.
6) After you break up with the Japanese girl, don't hook up with the next girl, just have fun, don't commit.
7) Oh, if you happen not to heed #6 make sure you don't cosign for the truck, if you do, please get it in writting in the divorce decree that it's her responsibility.
8) Almost forgot this, do not let your sister Angie use your Foley's credit card. This will haunt you for years and force you to have a bad credit history and hurt your chances for a good interest rate on the first home you buy.
9) While in college don't be afraid to double major in Computer Science along with your Physics degree.
10) Don't settle on any women. You do great. You don't screw up royally by having any kids with a fling or worse.
11) Be prepared. Life never ends up with what you planned for. It's not bad, just way different.
sort of like a King?
>>Thats not meaning. Thats an insult. Life is not meant to worship. Thats was Roman emperors wanted. That is a life for slaves.
>It was a result of christianity that slavery was abolished (admittedly not completed even today). Your argument is empty. Christianity was rejected and illegal by the Romans well before it was the state religion. Nero the emperor used to burn Christians alive and kill them. This is definately not a religion created by any government as a tool, either by the Roman empire or the Jews who wanted to overthrow the Romans.
it was embrace and extend, jujistu, there were a lot of splintered small groups. The spirit was coopted and particular sects chosen to work through.
Isn't it odd that Paul, founder of The Church was originally a persecutor of Christians? He was not a disciple of Christ while Christ lived, iirc.
On the other hand Christ himself seems to have been a brilliant philosopher with a message as of yet still not listened too on Earth.
-pyrrho
listen to your parents, they may talk a load of crock a lot of the time, but occassionally they do say something intelligent,
have confidence in yourself, you'll feel better for it,
you will have may good friends, treasure them,
finally
when you are 29 and you get Anna pregnant, protect you unborn child of yours and then dump that whore mother before she breaks you soul.
zugok 2003
"I just can't sit while people are saying nonsense in a meeting without saying it's nonsense" J Watson, Sci Am 288:(4)51
To self, don't freak out when girl asks you out. She might be pretty ordanairy now, but in a few years time you wont think the same.
And get over yourself.
Not all conservatives are stupid,
but it is true that most stupid people are conservative.
- Hume
good idea
Not all conservatives are stupid,
but it is true that most stupid people are conservative.
- Hume
My future self said, "Stock tip : International Apple Machines."
...and just gone into computer science as something to fall back on (given the state of the industry/economy today)! ;-)
Be bold with women...
You`ll turn down lots of girls because you feel that you dont really like them. That is actually good most of the time.
But there were some that just wanted to get some good feelings after a nice and relaxed date. And you turned them down because you couldnt relax. Just chill out man, they just want to have fun.
And you shouldnt turn down any girls that you actually like. You know: you won`t fall in love every other week! No you`ll fall in love every four or five years, not more than that. Use your chances.
Oh, and by the way: Never tell any girl "I love you" just because you think that its the apropriate thing to say in that particular situation, because: 1. its not, and 2. you dont.
The winning combination for the $10 million lotto prize when you turn 18 is: 627129
Sorry for turning this thread serious, but get some sun too! Or else you might end up with multiple sclerosis when you're 25 because you didn't get enough vitamin D growing up. Trust me.
One of the best handjobs I ever got was from a girl who used a circular motion around the base of the head of my cock while applying firm pressure with her thumb and simultaneously lightly teasing the peehole with her other hand.
I've NEVER come so fast and hard - and I've had my share of good ones
1. Embrace the evil. Good behavior isn't actually rewarded in this society, no matter how hard adults try and make you believe it.
2. Help someone else when they need help, and you can hang it over their heads forever, manipulating them to do your bidding. That's a joke.
3. Never date a woman with a tattoo of a dagger.
4. If 10% of the people you interact with do not hate or fear you, you are not standing up for yourself enough. those 10% are assholes, and shouldn't like you.
5. Ignore what other people say, unless those people are succesful at something you're failing at. And then only listen if it's constructive.
6. Be nicer to Celeste. You'll know who and when.
7. Tell your mom to fuck off when she calls you stupid. By 30 you won't call or interact with her except on Christmas. You have nothing to lose.
8. Take the meds. It's good for your personality.
9. Do not join the military just because you can't pay the rent this month. Eventually it will get better and if you're in the military, you will be convicted of adultery and discharged. Remember #3 also. 10. There will be a cheerleader named Robin when you're in 11th grade. She has the hots for you, but if you don't listen to me, you won't find out until she is moving away. She sits next to you in Algebra. She's a really nice chick.
11. Never lose your temper. Ever. Remain in control of your every action. It really is easier to make friends when you are in control of your actions.
Call the FBI and ask them how much they'd pay you to tell them how to save 3000 American lives and the destruction of the WTS in NYC. Save some lives AND get paid for it!
And make sure you got some really serious dirt on George W. in his 'wilder' years so you could smear him in to never being a worthy Presidential candidate.
I wouldn't change my life, but I'd at least try to avert all this crap we're going though now.
Footnote: At comment 1550 and counting, I bet no one gets to read this.
Dan. -- So what if it's spelt wrong, nobody's perfect
12yearoldAlGore: Holy shit, what an idea! Let me write that down.
This sig is part of your complete breakfast.
Ignore what school tells you to do. Start learning differential equations-based physics, not the dumb algebra stuff they give you...
1. Get more *real* college... a couple of years won't cut it... 2. Don't take comp/sci as a major, you'll regret it... 3. Don't be afraid to try that brilliant idea you have. It will actually both work AND be profitable... 4. Weed is NOT harmful... 5. Get out of that shitty little town as soon as you can... Better yet, leave the country (too cold anyways) 6. Never EVER apply for a creditcard... 7. Start saving NOW for that 15-inch Powerbook... 8. You DON'T need that fancy car... only a car that runs and is fairly safe to drive around... 9. Stop being so damn NICE all the time... Niceness hardly ever pays... 10. Learn social engineering now... You'll thank me. 11. Don't go to see "A.I." Trust me on this one. ... that's all I could think of...
Not as bad as it sounds, really....
Nothing, not at least without an attention getter. Actually I'd go to 16 or 17 instead of 12. That's when I was more screwed up.
Then I'd give myself a good flogging, to get my attention. Then I'd tell myself what to do. Mostly I'd give myself the same advice my parents were giving me at the time, after all thew WERE right about it, I was just too much of a smart ass to see it.
I'd also probably give the assholes that caused me so much grief in high school some serious pain as well (Hey as long as I'm there, and can't really be traced).
Try to imagine the most unbelievable service that could be sold on the internet. Then, when time has come (say november 1998), meet every Investor you can, and sell them shares for your idea. When done, buy a BMW Z3, a $3M villa, and as many dot com shares that you can afford, that you will sell a few weeks later, 4 times their value. When you're done...rest :)
____
nico
Nico-Live
Don't beat off so much, don't try drugs, alcohol or tabacco.
Study harder and don't be so negative.
AND QUIT BEATING OFF ALREADY!!!
"Wish you were here"
A blog I run for the wealth
1. LEARN EVERYTHING about PC's. EVERYTHING!!! Learn to program! There's this thing called the internet, get on it. 2. Save your money!!! Don't waste it on crap (followed by a definition of what crap is/was). 3. Buy these..Netacape, AOL, Microsoft, Yahoo, Ebay. Sell them on these dates. 4. Dude....lay off the soda and the chocolate, hit the gym. 5. Football is not important, but it might actually get you laid. 6. Tell your dad how he will die and when, and what his life choices will be and the consequences of them. MAYBE he'll decide to turn his life around. Bring photos if need be.
I purchased my first Atari 800 in 1979; and believe me, I was not rich. I didn't get a disk drive for the poor thing for 4 months (had to save!)
I worked like a dog to buy my 40-column dot matrix printer (Atari 820); an Atari 850 RS232 interface, a 9v battery-operated Signalman Mark III 300 baud modem and the extra RAM to bring it to the 48K barrier.
I was 12 at the time (go figure!)
Thanks to it, I started working at a computer store when I was 14 as a business systems programmer!
I am sure he realizes quite fully that the Infidel has no right to exist, let alone in the Promised Land. The coming slaughter shall be a sacrifice! Tribute to the glory of god! ...Then in my best Bruce Cambell... "Let's go."
>:)
My cube. My friend. My solace. My prison.
...FLAME ON
You... FUCKING... Jackass. With a capital J. I mean seriously.
I'm going to beat you with a clue stick for a minute based on your ASSumptions. 1) You don't know what freedom is or what it means until you don't have it. The first thing the military does is take that freedom away, long enough to show you just how precious it is - which is why the most ardent defenders of freedom are typically in the military. Dumb ass. 2) School... oh Christ, get a clue. If you think school was a waste of time, you probably didn't get anything out of it... because your an idiot.
Now... let's hit your quotes:
Life is about the struggle, constant improvement, striving to make each day better than the last How would you know? What's the last challenge, struggle or self improvement task you've completed in the last 6 years? Seriously, your whole rant screams that you've never left your own suburb. But you managed to lose your mind...
Schools were created to train people to crave the direction of leaders and to feel empty without someone telling them what to do Really? OH DAMN! Your RIGHT! I'll bet schools were created for just that purpose! I can't believe we didn't see it before! IT'S A SECRET GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY! The... the... illuminati! Who meet thrice yearly with "The Colonel" in a secret meeting place known only as... the meadows... What a jackass.
I find nothing pathetic about trying to open the eyes of someone blinded by deceit. That is a human life out there, wasting a way not much greater than an animal. Instead of kidding myself that a warrior caste is necessary to protect the people, I try to give mindless drones their lives back. Maybe I don't always succeed, but I sure as hell try. Thats life. It's pathetic when the one who's trying to open the other person's eyes doesn't have a brain. You don't know enough about religion, the beliefs people have about God, world cultures or true oppression to make any of these judgments. You've never seen shacks filled with villagers, all dead, who made the mistake of refusing to give all of their food to Columbian rebels. You've never seen an Afghani woman who's had her face cut off (literally) by her family because she was raped. The warrior caste you speak of is necessary because people like you will deny that these things happen, and when faced with the reality that it does, will claim that those people should just stick up for themselves. People like you are what make things like this possible.
Anyway, have fun slaughtering the innocent citizens of Iraq Truly a pathetic attempt at the 'baby killer' epitaph of the 70's. (And I never once said I was in favor of this war. You ASSume too much again.)
You don't know anyone in the military or anyone who believes in God, and if you do, the most you know about them is their name and that they are in the military or believe in God. You're a bigot. You've succeded. That's your life. How enlightened you must be.
My cube. My friend. My solace. My prison.
That's just one interpretation of nirvana - Buddhist I think, but I'm not sure. I was going for the whole 'this is what heaven is' spectrum... didn't think everyone would take me in such absolutes.
Should have known better.
My cube. My friend. My solace. My prison.
Old IE versions (1 or 2) had a blue background and a verse of some kind, to make fun of Netscape's red background and verse from The Book of Mozilla. At some time the IE programmers were asked to take out the verse. But the blue background remained.
My favorite is ass clown. Not sure where the hell that came from or what it means but, hey, ass and clown in the same insult. What more could you want?
Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
have more fun than you have been lately and dont let mom run your life.
Did you notice everytime you started talking I began to vomit.
Dear Self,
:D. Better times still await both of us
:)
Consider this an honest advise...coz its coming from the heart. Both of us can't be lazy. Either U get ur ass moving right now, or I would have to do it for u later. Sooo... so i think U should STOP BEING A LAZY ASS
Rest almost eveething works out fine... so far atleast
P.S: If its not too much trouble, buy a guitar soon
... hee2 is stuck under the bed.
Bill: "I don't know honey...Shit, who can understand this linux thing, lpr, VI, how do I exit VI, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I just want to print out this joke list I got emailed to me, those geeks make everything so difficult"
Bill's Wife:"Just download an easier distribution you are not Linus Torvalds, you fucking idiot"
An Education is the Font of All Liberty
Firstly, all the standard fair. Invent in the following companies: Microsoft, Cisco, AT&T, Worldcomm, & Nortel. Sell all of these stocks in the summer of '98 save MS.
Secondly, start getting out more. Stop being so quiet, shy, etc. Despite what you think, later on in life you'll find out that people actually consider you a very amusing person. So, start earlier and learn this in high school rather than collegee.
Thirdly, don't listen to the quote 'popular' people in your class / highschool when you get there. In the end ultimately yes you're a geek. But, in hind sight, you're now making a lot more money than those people. And, you're doing what you enjoy, working on computers and the like.
Lastly, when you start your job at the age of 21 working in a medical center around your home town, go forth seek out a girl. If you're anything like me, you'll know her when you see her / talk to her. My tip 'Bradly' and 'McCurdy' two names you'll understand when you start work. Don't hesititate or you'll be too late.
Above all else, don't be afraid to live a little.
"A friend of mine sent me a postcard the other day. On the front of it was a picture of the planet Earth taken from spac
Could it be?
E000-VB14-G8RY
"You asshole! I will have to spend the rest of my life trying to kill you!!!"
I am Law! You are Crime!
1. Get more exercise
2. Spend a week alone, don't talk to anybody
3. Study more math
4. Respect people
Whatever I would say, it wount matter because we all know. 12 year olds never lisen to anything you say to them.
He who controls the Source, controls the program!
don't worry. You really will be happy. Very soon...
People are DNA's way to make more DNA.
I know this sound like something lame and sports wear'ish, but the single thing I would tell my 12 year old self, was to just let go and jump in.
Be bold. Talk to girls. Talk to strangers, they might become friends one day. Do sports. Run. Swim. Don't be afraid to try something new. Break stuff. Fix it again. Do something every day that challenges you. Do something every week that scares you.
That was a lot more than one thing, but it basically boils down to:
Just do it. You'll be amazed what you are capable of.
I often find myself pondering the "what-if"s of my life. What if I hadn't passed out drunk after senior prom? What if I took Beth Horais to the prom instead of Mandy, which would have been the proper thing to do? And what if I hadn't been such a bitter jerk to Beth prior to graduation? What if I had told Kelly what was really on my mind? What if I never smoked cigarettes? What if I had bought a different first car? What if I had been more aggressive with that cheesy high-school basement band? What if I had moved with my parents and finished my Masters instead of staying in DC and getting married? What if my wife and I had never left the DC area?
... the list would be way, way, way too long, and I'd probably break down upon remembering what a lazy, lying nitwit and smart-ass jerk I was.
But while we all do this (granted, some much more than others) and it's merely a reminder that we learn from our past mistakes, thinking too much, too often about it can lead to serious bouts of depression, as happened to myself. I learned to start thinking and dreaming about my future.
But to answer the "Advice You Would Give to Your 12 Year-Old Self?" question, I'd drop the following hints to my geeky young self: cut your hair, get better-looking glasses, forget graphics and learn to hack instead, read more sci-fi and news, write more pros, take guitar lessons for at least one year, make martial arts a newfound dedication, tell your (my?) seventh-grade (Mrs. Keenan) math teacher that you KNOW you can take algebra in eighth grade, ask Beth Shelton out instead of Lara Brady (what the hell was I thinking?), do your best in school now (then, whatever!), and ignore Missy Easter instead of missing out of a couple extra months with Stacey Brittain because Stacey's sister Jessica busted me at the mall with Missy while Stacey was in Arizona for a month! Damn, I have a good memory of my youth!
Now, if the question was "Advice You Would Give to Your High-School Self?"
I'd have to say that I had two real turn-around points in my life: senior year of high-school (had the highest highs and lowest lows in just 10 months!, but it made me strong inside), and junior year of college (where I finally felt comfortable with myself and got up off my ass!).
Anyone who DOES remember the important quotes from Star Wars needs to have their life revoked.
I'd wait a few more years and send my twelve-year old self the entire Harry Potter set of books and tell him to pass them off as his own.
Accept no substitutes. Even shiny, spectacular, intense, emotionally appealing substitutes.
Learn some social skills while you have the chance. Middle school IS the United Nations/U.S. Senate and vice versa, so you might as well learn how to deal with them here.
Get summer jobs where you are in charge of somebody, kids at camp for instance, because in giving orders you'll learn the necessity of taking them and save yourself a LOT of trouble later.
Get Ritalin now.
Watch Star Trek so you'll know what everybody is talking about when you get to college.
Learn to learn.
In high school, I had to deny that I ever did, many times. And people told me to my face, "no, you DO." Being a so-called "headbanger" didn't help either.
My memory sucked then. I also had a best friend who constantly made fun of my shitty memory.
Later in life, in the college yeras, I took up the bong. Smoked every day for 10 years. My memory still sucks, but I resent the fact that because I fit a certain stereo type, that people assumed I smoked pot years before I ever had.
I also resent the idea that anyone with a bad memory needs to put the bong down. My memory sucked way before I ever smoked pot. Smoking pot certainly didn't help but it taught me how to use tools to assist my shitty memory (blogging for example). And also taught me to do my college homework right when I got home, rather than waiting til the last minute. (Because it was not fun to do homework stoned, except Calculus for some reason, so I preferred to work sober, finish it up, then smoke up.)
My point is that the above post is a troll, and I resent whoever meta-moderated my troll moderation to say it was unfair, because it's fucking fair.
Dude, make a detailed journal while you're in Cambodia. Save your money, don't buy those dumbass Transformer toys. Start working out more and get laid ASAP, oh, and start shaving your head NOW instead of when you go back to school. You'll look cooler. Trust me. Or should that be trust you? Or maybe trust us? Hey, didn't Venom have an us-complex?
- Froggy
Read _Stranger in a Strange Land_ and _Job: A Comedy of Justice_ before you go to High School.
My folks had a copy of SiaSL, but it was missing the first sixty pages. I didn't read it until my freshman year of college, whereupon I scarfed up (into my brain, folks, not my gut) the rest of Heinlein. Really, really wonder what would have been different if I'd absorbed "The Moon is a Harsh Mistress" and "The Unpleasant Profession of Jonathan Hoag" in my formative years.
There. That's what I'd tell my twelve year old self. Read Heinlein.
--grendel drago
Laws do not persuade just because they threaten. --Seneca
Put down the god damn blade.
Scars are not a good souviner to carry around for the rest of your life.
[Scary personal insight over.]
Buy 'Microsoft' and 'Oracle'
It's Christmas everyday with BitTorrent.
Dear Me.
Save your website to disk immediately. ( I would then name off all the stupid new pokemon and the stupid ne version) Learn frames and programming to
your friend,
You.