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What's the Worst Movie You've Ever Seen?
prostoalex asks: "A recent Ask Yahoo! article talks about the worst movies ever made and points out this IMDB list of the bottom rankings. The Ask Yahoo! article names Manos The Hands of Fate the worst one, but apparently the IMDB table changed since then to include The Wild World of Batwoman at the top of the list. What would you consider the worst movie ever made? Perhaps anything listed here would also make the list?"
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Pretty much anything featured on MST3K could be considered for the "worst... movie... ever..."
I make it a point to avoid viewing crappy movies. :P
I'm a signature virus. Please copy me to your signature so I can replicate.
If you ever see it, you'll understand... It was the worst movie I've ever seen, but at the same time, I'd rather watch it than any of those holywood blockbusters out.
The very worst movie of all time
"Hackers"
--
Are you a Chipotle Fan?
Though I must say Catwoman comes close.
Here's what I do: Bitty Browser & Andromeda
Horrible piece of shit. Damn shame too, since Rowan Atkinson is usually really funny.
Gigli.
Frink: Nice try floyd, but you were designed for scrubbing, and scrubbing is what you shall do.
has to be the most disappointing movie that I had ever seen.
Caught this at a midnight movie one time, has to be the worst film I've ever seen. The highlight of the film is Frank Zappa with a talking cow.
Worst movie ever. True.
Almost any of the SNL movies minus Wayne's World, Blues Brothers, and Office Space (started as a short animated SNL skit).
It's Pat
The Ladies Man
A Night At The Roxbury
Superstar
Stuart Saves His Family
Mr. Bill's Real Life Adventures
Coneheads
Blues Brothers 2000
Now a Sprockets movie... that would have kicked ass...
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The movie where Kevin Bacon is invisible and becomes mad as a direct result of the becoming invisible. Not the worse movie of all time but the worst Kevin Bacon movie.
The world called out for a hero and all it got was me...
My room mates and I decided to rent it one knight based soley on the Dragons on the box. It turned out to remind me of a student film by some drop out. Every time the hero entered, EVERY time, they played the same fanfare. To top it off, there weren't any dragons, just a portal with a humanoid demon-looking thing trying to step through. Bad as it is, I still recommend everyone try and watch it. Until you see it, your meter for bad, nay all movies isn't properly calibrated. As a side note, they have two sequals of which I intend to watch.
--fetch daddy's blue fright wig, i must be handsome when i release my rage
Maybe Street Fighter: The Movie? Or something of that ilk?
I hate watching movies where I can't suspend disbelief, if that makes sense. I mean, if a movie doesn't make the characters or plot believable, there's not much point in watching it.
Also, I suspect expectation has much to do with this thread. I was told The Talented Mr. Ripley was a COMEDY before I saw it, and it was probably the least funny movie ever made in the history of the world ever.
This review shoud just about cover it. Battlefield Earth is the "worst movie ever."
Don't waste time... procrastinate now!
...was, of course, "Titanic". Not just the worst *movie* I've seen, but the worst *three hours* of my life. Dental surgery is a lot more fun, for example.
:-(.
Then I clicked the link for top gross...
Buy Text Processing in Python
...because my girlfriend is making me go to it and chances are I will be sober. Can't they figure out how to isolate the poor-movie-taste gene!?
-- n
Vampires with James Woods and one of the retarded Baldwins
HellBoy with massive suckage
This
Aliens vs. Predator. Hands-down.
// James
was the worst movie I have seen. I had to quit looking since it was too bad...
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
This one beats them all. I've never seen anything as STUPID as "Cabin Fever". "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" is deep compared to that piece of shit.
Especially the Director's cut.
I watched this on TV about 2 hours ago. What were they thinking?? Shame - the first one was alright.
...WWII movies. All of them are an insult to what _really_ happened.
It's a tossup amongst three.
;)
Darkness Falls. Should have been called Suckness Rises.
Cold Creek Manor. Great cast. Awful, awful, awful screenplay.
Strangeland. So bad (and not in a good-bad way), we tried to spare other renters the experience by hiding the DVD at Blockbuster.
I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate.
I can't believe I actually paid good money for that DVD. For that matter, I can't believe they wasted the time, money, resources to PUT it on DVD.
Eyes Wide Shut has to be the worst movie I've ever seen. The music was terrible like someone was just trying to annoy you by randomly hitting the high pitch keys of a piano. It had so much nudity and was such a stupid story. It wasn't a porn, it wasn't a movie, it was floating somewhere in the middle that made no sense and wasted everyones time who watched it.
The movie was so bad I wonder if it contributed to Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman's divorce. It had to as after being in that movie I probably couldn't face anyone I was in the movie with. It was that bad!
Can't be a "worst" without a "II" in the title - Lawnmower Man II, Blues Brothers II(,000), and Men in Black II spring to mind.
8 6884088)...
And lest we forget - Cannonball Run II was so awful, it inspired an entire book (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/07
Perfectly Normal Industries
Major League II.
Enough said.
www.google.com
The Bush/Gore election in 2000...
et les Shadoks pompaient...
The only consolation I get for having wasted money to see this movie with my friends is that Tom gets hit in the head with a big rock in the last fight scene.
Without a doubt.
...with all those santa movies on there, I half expected to see "KISS Saves Santa" but alas.. I guess it isn't a real movie.
Highlander 2 should be there it was exceptionally bad.
Went to see it 'cuz it had a good preview, as far as sucky movies it had it all, very bad acting, cheesy inconsistent plot, and really bad special effects, I want my $7 back! M
I'm surprised to see that Plan 9 From Outer Space was not on the IMDB bottom 100 list.
Granted it is a cult classic, but we must remember that Ed Wood did consider it a serious film, as he did with all of his films. Bad acting, directing, plot, staging, editing only add to it's glory as a horribe movie.
Ed Wood, king of bad movies!
But the worst this-was-supposed-to-be-good-but-it's-crap movies I've seen in recent memory have been Riddick (a bunch of "clever" "ideas" apparently ripped out of a sullen 14-year-old's spiral notebook, then glued together with a hefty FX budget, but no story) and Anger Management (which seemed more like a psych experiment intended to see how many lame gags and how much spastic acting the audience would put up with without going ballistic themselves).
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Please cease and desist with your criticism of Battlefield Earth. This movie, based on a book by L. Ron Hubbard, is a masterpiece AND a true story. It also stars one of the two best actors of all time John Travolta. (The other actor is Tom Cruise.)
Thank you,
Scientology Lawyer #783 - Alien Name: X'narl'anguna
His scary feature, really big thighs.
IMDb / Amazon
Perhaps the most hysterical movie ever [poorly] crafted. If you like kung fu movies, get your hands on a copy of this and prepare to laugh.
G
With a group of friends, though, the movie is awesome to MST3K. Yes, I'm making a verb out of that.
The movie even has some very lengthy scenes of women in 1960s style underwear (meaning about eight times the amount of fabric used by Victoria's Secret) wrestling in the sand... and it's not that interesting. I really expected there to be some gratuitous nudity just to add some value to the flick, but, no. In fact, the movie is quite remarkable in that the script totally sucks, the camera work totally sucks, and they STILL managed to avoid any cliche that might have made the movie interesting. It's like the producer was completely inept, but he wasn't going to stoop to the levels of other tacky movies that were successful, popular, or better than awful.
If you can find this on DVD sometime, it's certainly worth ~$10, in my opinion, just for this hilariousness of its failure. The only real gripe is that the movie is so bad that it begins to rival homemade camcorder movies, and in that sense loses some of its legitimacy as the worst real movie of all time, but I think few people would have very strict rules for such a dubious award.
The worst move ever. Overall the movie reminded me of a medieval Scary Movie; however, the sad thing was it wasn't supposed to be. It was a bunch of pop culture integrated with the story of Arthur. The Saxons looked like the Barbarians in the Capital One Commercials. You know, "What's in your wallet?" Arthur's speech was a cross between William Wallace's in Braveheart and Henry the V's St. Crispin Day speech. The fight scenes were obviously choreographed. The acting was stereotypical British acting that reminded me of Eddie Izzard's commentary of stacking matches. I expected the Saxon kind to ask if Arthur had a flag. To sum it up it was the biggest waste of my money ever.
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
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This movie is so bad that it isn't even entertaining as a B movie. Walked out of this one when it was showing at some art house theater.
Grand Canyon by Lawrence Kasdan is another huge turkey. Insufferable movie about yuppies with plot twists that can be seen from a mile away.
It lacks in every category imaginable: overdone, boring, drawn out fights, CG that makes "Hercules: The Legendary Journeys" look good, pointless character cameos, and the worst performance in the history of film by Brian Thompson as Shao Khan.
"Foolish... [searches for line he forgot mid-sentence] child! [Looks back at production crew, checking if they're going to cut or not] You sorely test my patience!"
or
"The Earth was created in six days! So tooooo, shall it be destroooooyed!!"
That much of a brain rot. The best part of the whole movie was Rose McGowen topless, but it couldn't make up for the rest of the utter crap.
- A
blacula
I've always had a slightly hard time swallowing having MST3K bashed movies on the list. Odds are, very few people have seen Manos outside of that context, and it changes the experience of the film. Sure, it's bad, but it wouldn't have enough votes to be found bad without someone digging it up to show people.
I saw this movie with my family when I was about 12... horrible... horrible movie. If anyone has the brass to admit to seeing this, I'm sure they will verify this.
link
One wasnt as bad as 2, 3, 4 and the TV series on Sci-Fi. The first one was fun in a B-movie sorta way...
The Doormat
If you're not outraged, then you're not paying attention.
I saw this movie when it was in theatres back in 1998. It's so bad that it's actually kind of funny. It's kind of a fictional "behind the scenes" look at Jerry's show. Look at the Yahoo! movie information and you'll see what I mean.
That IMDB list is pretty bogus; there are a bunch of films with three stars on average. Plan 9 doesn't even get a mention. Good to see Robocop 3 and Highlander 2 on the list, even though some people obviously gave both more than no stars.
My nomination for worst movie ever? Armageddon. Damn, I hated that movie so much. People talk about Plan 9 being bad, but this is worse. If Ed Wood had been given godzillions of dollars for special effects, he'd have produced Armageddon.
Of course, it's possible that we'll never know what the worst movies are, cos we'll never see them. But of those that we do see, I'm more forgiving of dubious b-movies; if you've no budget, you've got to make do with what you have. But if your budget stretches to paying an actual actor, we can be more demanding; when you've got Titanic-level budgets, you've got no fucking excuse.
In case you care, movies I saw recently that sucked include Godsend, Twisted and The Day After Tomorrow.
Although there was some horror film that was actually worse, I've managed to excise the portion of my brain containing most the memories of it so I can't remeber the name at the moment..
Battlefield Earth is a close contender as well.
*A)bort, R)etry, I)nfluence with large hammer.*
Wow. You're pretty sheltered if that's your idea of a bad movie. Try out the recent Dungeons and Dragons movie (circa 2000 or so, IIRC) and then get back to us.
Bicentennial Man... the title sounds almost homo-erotic and lives up to it's name-- featuring robin williams as a very gay (or perhaps bi) robot.
Dark City has to be the worst movie I have ever seen in my life. I don't care if Proyas had a vision and I missed out on the subtler aspects of the plot but this movie was horrible.
It seemed like someone was trying to mix White Wolf with Philip K. Dick because it seemed cool, not because there was a story to be told. The only nice thing I can say about the movie was the set designs were pretty.
or every other movie made by Paul W. S Anderson.
Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. Too realistic to suspend disbelief, too stupid to be real. In addition, it was a LOVE STORY that got sold as an action movie. Yuk.
Dear god that movie sucked
If the dollar is an "I owe you nothing", then the Euro is a "Who owes you nothing." - Doug Casey
...The only thing worse than The Life of David Gale ever to make it out of the editing room. All these movies beg the questions: At what point do they first realize it and say "It's too late to go back now?" Is it ever really too late? And if not, what's the most expensive movie ever made that didn't get distributed because it was Just That Bad?
Have we finally come to the point where we must Ask Slashdot to Ask Yahoo?
Have a look at the IMDB bottom 100 and search for "police".
I'm sorry, but M Night Shyamalan's movies are full of just absurd plot holes. You mean to tell me that you've got a race of creatures that are capable of traveling through space, but they can't figure out how to break through a door? That those same aliens apparently lack any sort of telescopic device that would show them the Earth being covered in water ? How the hell do you miss that ? That a life form that reacts violently with water is cabale of surviving in an oxygen based atmosphere that is heavily saturated with water vapor? That when faced with an army of invading aliens, you would choose to lock yourself in your basement rather than heading towards a military base?
Even if you just look at the movie for its message, it's still retarded. You're supposed to come out of that thing thinking like 'oh there was someone looking out for them all along' - of course there was someone looking out for them -it's a movie! It wasn't 'god' that killed Gibson's wife and then set all that stuff up so that the aliens would die - it was M. Night Shyamalan, who wrote the script for the film. Of course it all worked out just right. Gah!My blog
Bar none, Cabin Fever is the worst thing I've ever seen on film. Compared to Cabin Fever, Troma films are Oscar worthy. Second runner up would be nearly anything by Jerry Bruckheimer. The Rock. Con Air. And especially the complete godawful Armageddon. Good lord, what a stinker.
I think Space Cowboys is the worst movie that comes to mind.
I'm still mad at myself I didn't walk out when it opened with a flashback to the 1950s space training (in black and white so you know its old!!), the scene had 20 year old actors playing the parts of Clint Eastwood and Tommy Lee Jones, but when they talked they had their voices dubbed over with the older actors voice... It actually got worse from there...
Even Milla Jovovich getting her kit off couldn't save it.
This movie so bad it is truly painful to watch. It is ten times worse than the 1966 Batman movie.
... fight evil and dance ?
The Wild World of Batwoman
"Plot Outline: The pointlessly-named Batwoman and her bevy of Batmaidens fight evil and dance."
Huh?
Freddy Vs. Jason sucked. they took common qualities of movies (like a hero, who falls, then somehow regains himself and saves the day) and repeated them continously throughout this movie... so gimmicky and stupid. the acting was horrible - one minute the naked girl is swimming, the next she's in complete terror... she went from one extreme to the next in a matter of 3 seconds, simply by hearing a cracking stick in the woods.. agh.. this movie was bad.
--- Caffeine is directly responsible for some of my greatest ideas, and some of my most embarrassing moments...
Okay, dude, you're missing the point! There are movies that are bad because they don't appeal to your taste... after all, there are those who quite enjoyed Moulin Rouge (and myself didn't mind it). OTOH, this topic is concerned with those very special movies out there that really are truly, universally, absolutely horrible.
Top six worst movies (that I've seen): 6. Crybaby 5. 9 to 5 4. Battlefield Earth 3. Star Wars Episode II 2. Runaway Jury 1. Swordfish Runaway Jury sucks. How is the gun company responsible for a guy who *steals* one of their guns, then illegally sells the gun to a guy who then uses said gun to kill another guy?
Help! I'm being repressed!
Surely there's someone out there to argue the merits of even the most obviously bad movies. Even Manos The Hands Of Fate, which was my all time favourite Mystery Science Theater 3000 pick, has its merits. It's so bad it actually wraps around into good again. But where is the movie that is despised by everyone, the movie which is truly crap. I don't think there can be one that is universally disliked by every human.
Scary Movie 2 is an hour and a half of my life that I'll never get back, and I honestly don't see how a Just and Loving God would allow such a movie to be made. That's right, the Wayans Brothers made me renounce my religion.
I'm trying to teach myself to set people on fire with my mind... Is it hot in here?
And this also happens to be my (and my wife's) favorite movie of all time.
Most of the movies people are listing here are major Hollywood movies that a lot of other people really like (Shrek, Moulin Rouge, etc.). You're just taking a contrarian viewpoint; I doubt you've even seen some of the truly bad movies from the IMDB list. Do yourself a favor and rent some Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes if you don't want to sit through a bad movie "straight". It's worth it.
Batman & Robin has to be the absolute worst movie ever. Sure there are similarly campy, idiotic movies out there, but the amount of money wasted in making this horrible movie makes it a bigger insult.
Tim Burton's Batman movies were cool. Joel Schumacher just totally ruined the franchise. When I saw Batman whip out his "Bat Credit Card" in the middle of some crazy rave party with dancing gorillas, that was the moment when it was clear that Batman had clearly jumped the shark.
"Backups are for wimps. Real men upload their data to an FTP site and have everyone else mirror it." -- Linus Torvalds
Mine :-)
For the longest time on IMDB (and still in my mind) You got served
Note how many are made very recently vs the top box-office returns of the same time scale.. ie the trend is films are getting worse, but making more money.
i thought spiderman 2 sucked allot (now im gonna get it) allot of pointless depressing character insight that really made you want to scream at the screen "for fucks sake, you could have made that pizza delivery on time if you had become spiderman quicker and not screwed around with that mop!" and "oh for crying out loud, tell her!" in the end, not only does he tell her (i thought that was the whole problem anyway?) but he somehow chose to both save lives and be with her?!?! so basically you have a premise, and instead of finding a solution you just say, oh ok, fuck it, lets just do that anyway im sure it will be ok. Then theres that octo-guy. "yes you see the arms are prevented from taking over by *this* *little* *chip* here on the back of my neck, yes just *here*, lets just *hope* nothing happens to that!!" but he just goes ahead and runs his experiment in the middle of the city anyway (because you just cant get the labour outside new york). Actually i missed the first film so i cant really comment on all of it and not _everything_ sucked, i liked the train sequence where even though he was a tough superhero there were still things that even he found hard.. all the other bits just served to make you really irritated because they wernt really problems.
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The Barbarians (1987) is the only movie I ever walked out on.
The acting was horrible, there was almost no plot, and there was a ton of nudity. I could only watch it for a few minutes.
There's no worse movie than Hollow Man. Why do put someone invisible to kill everybody on the block. I do prefer a visible Jason doing that.
The ONLY movie I have ever walked out before it was finished. I know someone had to get fired over that flaming fecal fest.
Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity is the worst movie ever.
It has all the plot and character development of pornography plus all the sex and nudity of the 700 Club.
-Dave
anyone else saw this movie? hopefully not
What about Bob
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It was a frickin musical. It looked like it was made by some highschool kids. They were going for so-bad-it's-funny, but got so-bad-the-TV-imploded.
Everytime megaman walks, does it count as another "Million Man March"?
Without a doubt.... THX1138
Not only real cheezy with those VW kit cars, but just plain stupid and boring to boot.
And I saw it in the theaters when it was first released, what a waste of time and money.
Flame away kiddies, it still sucks big!
I picked this one up at the local blockbuster on the way home from work about 10 years ago. It was BAD, but strangely I couldn't take my eyes off the screen.
It has a little of everything-
Exploding bums,
Gang rape by the homeless,
The severing of a bum's member then the subsequent game of keep away,
A creep getting his ass kicked by a cop, then puked on after having his head stuffed in a urinal.
Great stuff...
But...it is an awful lot of fun to use the lines in everyday conversations. For example: yesterday, someone came up to me and asked if I could tell them how to retrieve a file from backups.
My reply: "A man animal learning how to retreive a file from backups?!? Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!" And then I swished around my dreadlocks, put my six-fingered hands on my hips, stood proudly in my three-foot stilts^Walien boots, threw my head back and laughed some more.
Hours of entertainment, I tells ya...
Carousel is a lie!
It's funny, but a lot of the movies on the worst of the worst list probably have cult followings. If a movie is so horrific, you can count on people talking about how bad it is, creating drinking games from it, and just watching 5 minutes of it when it's on TV at 3pm some Saturday afternoon on TBS or FX because they recall, "Oh, yeah... this movie was soooo bad". Viewing a horrible movie is like driving past a car accident... you know you shouldn't slow down and look, but you do anyways. I feel sorry for those movies that suck, but don't suck quite enough to be remembered. For example, who will be talking about "The Alamo" (the movie, not the actual event) in 5 years?
"Oh dear, she's stuck in an infinite loop and he's an idiot" -Prof. Farnsworth (Futurama)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102511/
Teenagers.. Me and the friends, see a movie in the paper thats NOT RATED, think - Oh yea, lets go see that..
Typewriters turn into cockroaches/beetles. Monkey's in cages. Men named "KIKI".
Worst.. Movie.. Ever.
GPL'd web-based tradewars themed space game
DNA with M&M's. You'd have to have a planet's worth of M&M's to do anything useful. Seriously - I kept watching because I was sure it would eventually get better. Right?.......
Let me start out saying that I am a Jackie Chan nut, and I DO own this DVD. Having said that... The subtitles are misspelled, make no sense, and frequently have words that are obviously made up. Parts of women randomly turn into food... and there's a song and dance number by a pair of chinese guys in black leather/spandex biker outfits... Jackie Chan even dresses up as various street fighter characters(including chun li) and fights at one point. Aside from some impressive fight scenes, this is in my opinion the worst movie of all time... Even worse than Manos.
Show me the script! No really, I haven't read it yet.
Bad movies are a dime a dozen. Just crack open the MST3K episode list, and you'll have an infinite supply.
A better challenge is finding the most Mediocre movie. Not too good, not too bad. Exactly at that point where, while you can remember seeing the movie, that's about all you can say about it (one way or the other).
Personally, Operation Dumbo Drop did it for me. Absolutely average and mediocre. Not really bad, because it accomplished pretty much everything it set out to do without being incompotent about it. Not really good either, because what it tried doing was so pointless and banal.
Anyway, what are some other Truly Mediocre movies?
Despite anything you may read in this article, it was dumb and annoying. A VERY close second is Masters of the Universe that destroyed any pleasant childhood memories I ever had of playing with He-Man toys.
Darned tropical millipede! What's it doing in our apartment?
Death Race 2000, not only because of Sylvester Stallone... I heard that Carmageddon games are based on this movie.
Who is John Galt?
I'd go for this.
The Star Wars Holiday Special.
Not a lot of people know this, but there is another 'secret' star wars movie out there. George lucus tryed to have every copy destroyed, but one guy must have taped it, kept the video, and relesed in on the file-sharing networks.
Highlights inlude the first half hour is being in wookie, with no sub titles, itchy, and scratchy, chewies relatives, wookie porn, Gefferson Starship, and princess lea singing. You have to check it out...
Offtopic, Inflammatory, Inappropriate, Illegal, or Offensive comments might be moderated up.
Many "worst movies of all time" lists tend to not include the absolute worst ones ever made. Many obscure poorly done films are overlooked, and instead these lists will only put in the bad films that will be remembered. In fact, we could sum most of these lists up to be really lists of 3 things: 1) most disappointing hyped-up films, 2) most memorable bad films, and 3) worst recent films.
:)
That said, IMDb does an ok job of giving the bad obscure films their due.
"Old School" was the flick I saw with no redeeming value whatsoever. Not even to watch as a "bad" movie.
I watch a lot of movies, including obscure ones. Of course I avoid mainstream Hollywood movies that I know I'm not going to like, but I still think it's interesting that the two worst movies I've ever seen don't come from Hollywood. And the two movies mentioned are: ... drumroll...
Pola X and Waking Life.
The funny thing about Waking Life is, I can imagine stupid Americans thinking how deep it is :)
Guikachu: Resource editor for PalmOS developers
Worst movie ever. Although I haven't seen the Village yet, heard that that may be worse.
And I really liked the 6th sense and Unbreakable.
That's why Signs was so damn disappointing.
Jesus used to be my co-pilot, but we crashed in the mountains and I had to eat him.
There are really bad movies, I've seen some of them on MST3K, etc...
But, you can look at almost all film student projects, etc, and say, god that's horrible.
A different measure, is, "what's the worst movie you've ever paid to see".
"The 13th Warrior", and "John Carpenter's Ghosts of Mars" are the worst movies I have ever paid money to watch.
I have seen many, many terrible movies; but the absolute worst are all ones that I had high expectations for. Until I actually saw the film and realized how totally, completely wrong I was.
Jackie Brown sucked so horribly that the entire second hour of the movie was filled with internal debates as to whether or not to walk out. I wound up staying, and I regret it immensely.
The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover was excruciating from the title on. But I had heard how wonderful it was, blah blah blah. The best part turned out to be that my date also wanted to leave but we both stayed because we thought the other was enjoying it. If only we had known!
What Dreams May Come looked good in the previews. Oh how wrong I was.
This must be the all time low :).
CC.
TaijiQuan (Huang, 5 loosenings)
...the worst movie ever is Escape From L.A.
Watched *MAYBE* 5 minutes of it... then was like "Fuck this"
Yup, the worst movie I've ever seen is one of the most top-grossing. Independence Day. It sucks sooo majorly.
Titanic.
Gigli.
Striking fear in the authors of godawful fanfiction, I am here, appearing in darkness, Tuxedo Jack!
Any movie with Will Smith. I know he's got geek factor (he turned down MIT, as I understand it), but seriously.. he can't act.
Want a nice review of I, Robot? Check out the best page in the universe.
1) Will Smith
2) Explosions/Aliens/Robots
3) ????
4) PROFIT!!!
With George Clooney. I'm a big sci-fi fan and can usually sit through most of them, even the really bad ones. But this was just aweful and extremely painful to watch. Got some guests you want to get rid of? Pop in Solaris and watch them flee.
btw since I just saw it I thought "Lost in Translation" sucked pretty hard as well. I know it got awards and even got above 8 at IMDB but man did I find it uninteresting. Two boring characters visit Japan and don't know what to do. How interesting. Yea things in Japan are different, so what? Lock yourself in darkened closet close your eyes and pretend your in Japan and bored. Cheaper and more entertaining.
If you wanna get rich, you know that payback is a bitch
WORST movie I have ever tried to watch ... I say tried to watch because i could not watch it for more than 30m .... it was just too HORRIBLE
I can tolerate some bad movies but ecks vs sever made plan 9 from outer space look like citizen cane in comparison!
Bad acting, bad effects, bad plot, and based on a movie that did no justice it's source. All around crummy.
Although MST3K'ing it made it almost worth the $1.99 rental... Almost.
I am going to say the latter two Matrix movies, especially the 2nd one would take this vote for me, for reasons that are not technical. I can name many movies which were technically (meaning the actual tasks of editing, music, camera work, etc) were crap. The recent 'House of the Dead' movie comes to mind, it had a respectable budget but quite literally the actors would start laughing in the middle of lines and it seems the director hired his nephews to do the music, camera work, and the script.
Disregarding this however, I state the last 2 Matrix movies as a) They had huuuuuuuuuge budgets to work with b) they took a very strong concept/story and butchered it c) it was pretentious with its hollywood arm chair philosophy which it tried to use as a mask for its lack of real substance (the first one had philosophic concepts, but did not attempt to say 'HEY LOOK WE'RE BEING PHILOSOPHICAL!' like the 2nd movie did quite a bit) d) they managed to cheapen their own effects further, which was impressive because I thought every other movie had already cheapened it enough (I speak of the neo-smith clone fight scene which was quite frankly boring) e) They took what could have been a trilogy that could have stood next to the likes of star wars orig and LOTR and instead turned it into dime-novel philosophy & hollywood same-old-shit (i know, i repeat myself, but this point irritates me). I dont claim that matrix was going to be some film classic, like Citizen Kane, but shit, it could have been better. I am not a massive Matrix fanboy, especially since as a reader of science-fiction, theres a lot out there storywise thats far superior, but its dissappointing to see a movie that really was genre-redefining in certain respects be relegated to another trilogy best not watched beyond the first.
Matrix aside, as far as recently made bad movies, House of the Dead though gets my vote however for worst overall, though Scary Movie 2 takes a close lead (after watching it, I was 99% sure they filmed the entire movie w/o a script, and in-fact just gathered all the actors and said 'DO STUFF' and captured it on camera, so its not so much a movie as a slightly above amature home video with better lighting).
"What can a thoughtful man hope for mankind on Earth, given the experience of the past million years? Nothing." -Bokonon
The fact that it had nudity in almost every second scene AND I STILL TURNED IT OFF HALF WAY speaks volumes.
- Mr.Oreo
Absolutely wretched.
If the earth's magnetic field is weakened, microwave radiation will get through to the surface of the earth and literally cook anything on the surface!
And of course, nuclear weapons will get the core spinning again, and said nuclear weapons must be delivered to the core by a manned vessel.
This movie was even worse than GNfOS.
Hear recorded Slashdot headlines on your phone! New service beta testing. Just call (248) 434-5508
I've seen some real lousy movies, but Cool World is the only big screen production that I've ever walked out on.
---anactofgod---
"Equal opportunity swindling - *that* is the true test of a sustainable democracy."
What are we talking about here?
I mean, there are bad movies, bad movies, and bad movies.
One is the kind which is so bad that it's lacking qualities unintentionally give it good entertainment value. The "So-bad-it's-good" genre.. Like the classic "Plan 9 from outer space".
It's bad, but quite entertaining.
Then there's the category of movies which are bad, but on the other hand, never really try either. "Surf Nazis Must Die" would be an example.
Then you've got the movies which are really bad, yet have the pretention of being good. These are the worst kind, because they leave you with nothing but frustration wondering what the heck the producer was thinking spending money on this.
(I don't really blame the actors.. They've got bills to pay too, y'know.. But the producer is the guy who had hundreds of screenplays to chose from, and he chose that one?!)
"Gigli" comes to mind as a recent example.
Why mod anyone down in a topic about asking what you think is the worst movie you've ever seen? So, if someone said Star Wars Episode 2 would you mod them down as a troll too? Because I'll say that.. Attack of the Clones sucked donkey balls. George Lucas should be ashamed of himself. Man, that's why I like Fark better.. no idiotic moderation system. If you post something bad enough then it just gets deleted, but here the moderators will basically delete your posts (mod them below 1) because they don't agree with your opinion. That's pretty fucked up.
dude...agreed, so agreed. jesus christ vampire slayer was hilarious in some parts, it was so bad. for an even worse movie, not even preferable to the hollywood blockbusters, try "the hunger", with david bowie and susan sarandon. somehow, they manage to make a godawfully slow, boring, "i want to claw my eyes out" movie *despite* lesbian vampire sex scenes between sarandon and a decently hot blonde. now that, my friends, is talent.
Need I say more? IMDB it if you dont believe me!
Absolute, complete pile of shit. Beyond melodrama and fell right off teh rating scale: grade Z would've been an improvement. The screenwriter, actors and director should be taken out into an empty field and beaten with bricks.
I am a believer of momentum and curves.
The Fifth element bad?! You take that back!
I do security
Badmovies.org has quite a good list. Of which 'elves' appears to be my favorite
That movie was godawful..inacurate, lame plot, CGI was half decent..worst movie ever...
a close second is unbreakable, and yes, I did figure out the ending..about halfway....
as other people have stated, SNL sketch based movies are typically pretty bad..and not good bad..bad bad...
Compared to someting like "Nulk" (yes, that typo was intended !)
I find it strange no one mentioned this fil.. mov.. shi.. well, you know... green thing...
It takes 40+ muscles to frown, but only four to extend your arm and bitchslap the motherfucker
Under the Tuscan Sun. Terrible.
.. but The Pledge was so bad I went on a mission for months making sure people didnt waste their precious breath watching this.
"When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back!" -- Cave Johnson
My friends and I used to rent old movies in a search to find some truly horrible ones. Don't ask me why we did this. Some were bombs, others boring. I'd have to rate Evil Dead (the first one) as my #2 worst movie.
The worst I've seen is Dead Alive (or "Braindead"). A sumatran rat monkey bites a grandmother, and her geeky son decides... "Well, she's a zombie now. Better not let the neighbors find out". There is no explaining this movie or the extreme ridiculousness of it. It was filmed in New Zealand, and one of the most notable details is that the camera is *always* a little too close to the actors. It's like tilting your head sideways when something is tilted on screen, except you keep trying to back up.
But this is the incredible part... my friend eventually looked up the director. Guess who it is? It really is worth click on this link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103873/. I guess it wasn't a bad start for this director!
Anyway, here's a (partial) list of some of the horrors I've witnessed, and these don't even include anything from MST3K! (Although if it were ever to come back, they would be eminently suitable for MSTing...)
The Cat In The Hat
Torque
Fire Down Below (Harry Dean Stanton, no! What *were* you thinking?)
Batman & Robin (obvious, I know)
Double Team
Evilspeak
Saturn 3
Practical Magic
Vampire In Brooklyn
Wing Commander
Gigli
Highlander 2
Rollerball (the remake - Jesus, this was from the man who made Die Hard and Predator! What the fuck has he been smoking for the past 15 years?)
Jaws: The Revenge
The Master Of Disguise
Ballistic: Ecks Vs Sever
Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle
Pearl Harbor
Ugh. Just thinking of the films on that list makes me want to go and watch North By Northwest or Aliens or The Shining, just to cleanse my brain!
You must think in Russian.
I like the subtle stabs at Disney (Shrek is NOT a Disney movie). DULOC = Disney Under Lord Of Control.
The worst movie ever was named:
Bikini Bimbos in the Avacado Valley of Death
(Yes.. it's a real movie.. it's simultaneously terrible and great-in-an-Ed-Wood-sort-of-way).
I just cannot resist: ROTFL!
#
#\ @ ? Colonize Mars
#
Richard Chamberlain, before he came out of the closet, trying to be Indiana Jones.
Sharon Stone, before she showed off her naughty bits in Basic Instinct.
Not the worst ever, but the worst through which I've ever sat.
--Stafford
I thought The Matrix was alright, but the sequels sucked in comparison. They're probably not the worst films ever, but some of the most disapointing. They made a rather nice brainless action movie, then go way to weird and into mysticism in that later movies. And the final battle sucked (along with the ending in general), which is the most important thing in an action movie anyway.
I'm planning to get rid of my Matrix Reloaded DVD at some point, and pretend the last two films never happened. The first film is staying though.
10 PRINT "LOOK AROUND YOU ";
20 GOTO 10
I used to be a fan of that Tom guy, from his days on that MTV show he used to have, This movie, by far, sucked so bad that I stopped half way through and returned it to Blockbuster. It was so not funny and the humor was so (badly) forced that I almost demanded my money back.
Also, we went to see that god-awful Adam Sandler Xmas movie where he was some mean bitch because his parents died on Hanukah one night. We walked out half way through. It was just BAD. Nothing funny, and it was just a mean-spirited movie. I can handle that when it's done in a talented way, but this just sucked ass. Again, I wanted my $$ back.
Worst as in 'insult to the intelligence':
Beastmaster
Worst as in 'shoddiest pile of celluloid':
No Retreat, No Surrender
The review in the newspaper agreed that even the miking on this film was poor. IMDB reviews are no' so glowing, either.
Get thee glass eyes, and, like a scurvy politician, seem to see things thou dost not.--King Lear
Directed by Richard Elfman, with Hervé Villechaize as "King Fausto of the Sixth Dimension."
After you watch it, all you can do is shake your head and ask "What just happened?"
Probably one of the most poorly done books to movies ever created. I ended up walking out after 45min or so. The problem was the movie used all of the wrong parts of the book to tell the story. The character and story development jumped all over the place and it felt like it was going no where fast. It is the only movie I have ever walked out of before it finished. Oddly enough I wasn't the only one who thought this because after me and my friend got up a few others left as well at the same time.
As a huge fan of bad movies I have seen Manos about 15 times. It is the worst made movie in every way. Nothing went right. It is like a train wreck, so horrible you CANT look away. It was financed, written, directed and starred a fertiliser salesman. 'Nuff said.
What post? The one you're carrying inside your rusty innards!
Ok, first off, Burn Hollywood Burn isn't that bad of a flick. It aint great, but I love it non-the-less. It's got a good (re:real) alternitive soundtrack, and it's the film that broke the Alan Smithe story wide open.
I recomend anyone who hated the lovely late 90's films that blew up crap for no reason to see this film, and find out the man behind Alan Smithe films is non other than Eric Idle. It makes alot of sence.
Oh, and you also get to see foreplay with a tebetian stone(I know I can't spell, I can barely see right now).
Alas, poor clippy, I loath him so.
This movie was so bad that my brain won't even let me remember the title anymore ... It was one of those 3D movies and the basic plot was that a town had been taken over by some mysterious force that enclosed it in a plexiglass dome. Most of the population was kept 'passive' by drinking something from an alien tree (or something) that had teats. Much of the movie was standard 3d shlock like someone sweeping and then throwing the broom out towards the audience.
About 3/4 of the theater had walked out before the movie was even half-way finished and I remember that my dad was apologizing to my mom for weeks afterward for insisting that we stay for the whole thing. *shiver*
Saw AVP last night with some friends...the whole theater was laughing at the lame lines, stupid shots, etc.
[SPOILER ALERT]
I didn't expect any romance from this movie, but the romantic tension between the ice climber girl and the predator was thrilling! LOL. After she has to shoot the Italian, she turns to the predator, and I thought she was going to say "Hold me." This movie is bad, very bad.
Vote for global prefs bug
Dude, you just described half the crap that sells out nightly on broadway. Be a bit more specific.
I love this movie. It is awful. http://imdb.com/title/tt0104135/ Features the Paul brothers, who you may also know from 'The Barbarians,' a Conan knock-off. Great stuff. Truly awful.
Pure propaganda - chock full of deceit. The 9/11 commission report refutes virtually every point in the film.
[Insert pithy quote here]
I would have to say Dune, both the David Lynch version and recent Sci-Fi mini-series. It's heartbreaking how unfaithful and badly adapted both of these films are, with the mini-series as the worse offender.
"I DARE you to make less sense!"
I would bet a large some of money that Ridley was locked in a box for most of the production.
Of Alien, not Legend.
Sigh.
Also, that dance sequence was stupid, not to mention the fucking mirrors.
Easily the most amazingly bad movie ever. A "Born-Again, Glam-Disco, Futuristic, Apocalyptic, Christian, Cautionary Tale" (made Israelis). If you haven't seen it you cannot truly be called "cool" Out on DVD real soon now (really).
Michael
I just remembered Atomic Train!: The breaks on a train fail and tragedy approaches Denver (several hours away) this gives our NTSB hero time to say "kids, ive got to go save a train" jump in a chopper and attempt to stop it. abviously killing the power, removing fuel, uncouppling the front or jamming a spanner in the works just aint gonna stop this thing. so they try dumping a load of sand on the track afew miles ahead (and mr hero gets his chopper nicely landed on the tracks ready for a close call moment for no reason). then suddenly we learn the truth!!! someone decided to ship an old russian nuke going to be decomissioned or something (cant remember, dont care, whatever) and as we all know nukes dont get set off just by being dropped or smashed in a train, but this is a.. you know.. russian nuke.. the rest is history, culminating in a a poor (stock footage?) nuke going off and everyone going boo-hoo.
This comment does not represent the views or opinions of the user.
I must say that the saddest movie I've ever seen is Star Wars Episode I. I'm still depressed after these 5 years of seeing my childhood memories raped like that.
Gigli wins this title hands down. It' just horrible but not horrible enough to be funny in a Plan 9 kind of way. Worst way to spend 2 hours and pay for it, too, Gigli is.
Sigs for Nerds. Sigs that Matter.
They botched the ending compared to the book but; you wouldn't know that would you?
Supernova: Possibly one of the worst Sci-Fi movies I've ever seen. The whole plot is meaningless and it ends up being a cheap "monster" movie. The movie is so bad that the "opening credits" appear at the end.
Dreamcatcher: This one goes to the "WTF?" category. Another cheap alien movie, with no plot and lots of loose ends. It's clear that well-paid actors alone won't take you anywhere.
Battlefield Earth: A Sci-Fi movie directed and produced by John Travolta. Need I say more?
The Hulk: Crappy special effects in a crappy movie. And to think that I liked the original series when I was a child...
I'm already bracing for impact about "I Robot" starring "Will Smith". Oh dear...
What the fuck was he thinking about?
I HAVEN'T OWNED A TELEVISION SINCE 1967 AND ONLY WATCH MOVIES ABOUT LEFT-HANDED ALEUT LESBIAN PIPEWELDERS! FUCK HOLLYWOO
By far the worst movie I've ever seen, and possibly the worst movie ever created, would have to be "Going Overboard" ( http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0096870/ ). Not only did they shoot and release it, but some idiot decided to waste the companies time and money by rereleasing it on DVD; I bet he was fired shortly after.
Gotta love how many times you can kill an invisible man.
This was a made for TV movie, but it sucked bad. Really bad. If you could find a way to mathematically quantify just how bad this movie is, you would probably go mad like that guy from Pi and drill a whole in your head. You might even be tempted to do that while watching it.
Worst. movie. ever.
Think for yourself, destroy your television.
Are you talking about worst "bad" movie or worst "good" movie, because there are two categories here.
The "bad" category is simply that, bad. It's the movies everyone loves to hate, such as Plan 9 From Outer Space, Battlefield Earth, The Postman, Glen or Glenda, Glitter, Gigli etc.
The "good" category is more complicated, but it's also a lot more fun (or more infuriating). It's the movies that were overhyped. Movies that may have won awards or broken box office records. Still, watching them is practically unbearable to anyone with an IQ over room temperature.
My list would of course have to include Armageddon, Pearl Harbor (or just every Michael Bay film), Men In Black 2, Godzilla and that overcooked turkey of last year: Cold Mountain.
So, if I have to pick one from each,
Battlefield Earth and Cold Mountain.
BE was awful in every way, and nobody made any excuses for it (well, Travolta did, but what do you expect).
CM was horrifyingly awful and yet Miramax spent millions buying Renee Zellweger an Oscar (which in reality had more to do with her previous two non-winning nominiations than it did Cold Mountain). It was overdirected, overwritten, overacted (really badly by some), overproduced and just over-everything...
In any case... those are my choices.
-- This sig for rent.
They even managed to "top" the first part...
Fahrenheit 9/11 has a 50/50 chance of winning Oscar for Best Picture, and has re-definied the documentary genre. It already won best picture at Cannes. Forget that... it criticises someone you support. Well... it appears that you are the one who has forgotten that "Free Speech" is protected in the Constitution. Unfortunately, some conservatives think the only "free speech" should be speech they agree with.
Have a look at the following reviews:
i mdb.com/title/tt0102804/
..Because this is one movie you just gotta see ONCE, if only as a yardstick of sheer crapness.
;)
:)
http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0104702/
http://us.
(They are basically the same movie - search for more info)
To quote:
Staring Frank Stallone and Joe Estevez
Then take a look at Scott Shaw's other gems. You could probably fill out the list
Really, Plan 9 from Outer Space is art house in comparisson.
This is the only movie I will get up and walk out of the room for just because someone is watching it. The only scene that keeps me from buying every instance of this movie and burning it is the helicopter/surf scene. That scene in itself is a classic. I would actually buy a DVD of just that scene if it were available. The rest of the movie is napalm bait.
There is a sequel to the fine cult classic "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" and it's called "Shock Treatment".
Since we enjoying the orignal so much a friend and I rented it. It was almost physically painful as we got closer and closer to the end hoping it would end soon. But no! It dragged on and on.
Arnold Schwarzeneggers first movie: Hercules in New York. :)
Notice that his name in that movie is "Arnold Strong", probably because of his hard-to-spell surname
On a more recent movie it has to be Mars Attacks!.
How the hell can you get so many celebs to act in a such horrible movie!
Jaws 4 the Revenge
The Keep
Someone you trust is one of us.
Austin Powers 3. I actually paid to go see it too. That's $10 and 2 hours of my life I'll never get back.
---
I didn't want to leave this space blank.
Really scares you doesn't it?
Don't worry, you'll be able to heap 4 more years of
praise on your leader, King of the Morons. The fix is in.
where's "plan 9 from outer space" ?? i was expecting to see many, many +5 funnies to that effect...
filter: +3. Hey, look! all the trolls went away!
Kill Bill vol.2
The former is brain damaging to adults, and the latter is the most boring movie of the recent time.
Trolls are like broken clocks. They show the truth two times a day. The rest of the day they talk nonsense.
Mod parent down as ogre^H^H^H^H^H troll
Life is like a sewer; what you get out of it depends on what you put into it...
The Underground Comedy Movie featured Slash judging a bag queen beauty contest, a supermodel taking a shit, and some guy seducing a corpse. By far the worst movie I've ever seen. It was even worse than Batman and Robin or Jurassic Park II. What a summer that was.
The new Yugioh movie. 37 reviews, all negative. Never seen a 0% movie on rotten tomatoes before.
Possibly the only movie I've given 1 star to on Netflix. Couldn't make it past the 10 min. mark. Worse than that Benifer abortion: "Gigli."
Yes, it's true. This man has no dick.
At least somebody has the same opinion. Congo must be the worst movie ever. I only saw this film in the movie theaters by accident: the newspaper had wrong information about which movie was gonna be shown and we were so late that we didn't check at the theater itself.
more than 13% people think it is crap (awful)
Most of those votes were made before the film even opened, by dittoheads who hate Michael Moore and most of whom haven't even seen it.
-- This sig for rent.
Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment, but I've seen all of Freddie Got Fingered. I can assure you that it is indeed the worst movie ever.
"Dave, I stand still--the conclusions jump to me!" - Bill McNeal, NewsRadio
"At the site of the 1969 rock concert at Woodstock, New York, an electrical charge turns a local farmer into a murderous werewolf..."
A staggering 2.4/10 on IMDB.
You must not have seen the first movie. MI2 came across as a pretty standard action movie: Stunts, Good guy, bad guy, girl, things blow up, etc. Yes the screenplay was horrible but at least it had Woo directing.
However, Mission Impossible 1 was (for me) the worst movie EVER. I remember newspaper articles that came out with the movie that was trying to explain the plot! Enough people contacted the local reviewer that he had to write a plot synopsis... for people who had already seen the movie. On top of the train-wreck for a screen play is Brian De Palma... one of the worst directors ever. Then you have the Cruise's decision (he was a producer) to throw out the TV formula, and have the entire movie concentrate on one character. And I'll never forgive Danny Elfman for changing the theme to 4/4 time (...and I'm a Boingo fan.)
This movie really goes beyond bad for me. To paraphrase PJ O'Rourke talking about the Siberian express: "pure incompetence could not explain this, some form of intentional malice must be involved."
$7.95/mo, 200 GB disk, 2TBxfer, MySQL, PHP, RoR.
I've seen my share of bad movies.. but many of the worst movies are actually so poor that they are already funny.. but there's an exception!
Jason X. No need to explain. It's the TENTH sequel to the Friday the 13th series and its utter crap from the beginning to the end.
... until you have seen a Godfrey Ho ninja movie.
;p
Godfrey Ho's business plan:
1/ Take random unknown unfinished Asian kungfu movie
2/ Add Western actors in ludicrous ninja suits
3/ Try and connect the two totally disconnected storylines (hilarity ensues)
4/ ???
5/ Profit!
For starters, Ninja Terminator and Ninja Thunderbolt are true classics. Nothing can beat Richard Harrisson using a Garfield-shaped phone or throwing shuriken at crabs in his kitchen, not to mention Jaguar Wong kicking a 4-inch stone 300 yards away at the baddies
Words aren't enough to describe them. They aren't mere movies: they are a life-redefining experience. Go rent the DVDs and experience them yourself!
Do not however make fun of ninjas - for they are the one true Real Ultimate Power!
Me: "Don't say love. Don't you dare say love. GOD DAMN YOU DON'T SAY LOVE!"
. "
the unblinking eye of the movie screen: "The Fifth Element is...love!"
Me: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGH
I could beat Luc Besson senseless with a crowbar, rifle through his wallet and retrieve my $8, but I will never get those two hours back.
News for Nerds. Stuff that Matters? Like hell.
It's a recommender system, so you rate a bunch of movies, and it starts predicting ratings for movies based on your own ratings and the ratings of others.
For me, it predicted Pokémon Heroes as the worst, with Ernest in the Army, Ernest Goes to Africa, Barney's Great Adventure, and Faces of Death 5 as the 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th worst movies.
-jim
I remember seeing it the first weekend thinking "this looks like a great sci-fi epic...but I don't know anything about it and I don't want the plot spoiled for me, so I better go see it this weekend"
holy crap...I am now dumber then I was before going to see that movie...my life is now lesser then what it could have been as a result of it...it was like listening to some of Jewel's music....crap.
RB
----------
ah honey, we're all resplendent - Bill Mallonee
Because Shrek is generally accepted as a funny, quality movie packed into a tight 90 minute package. If you don't like the movie, it's a matter of poor taste, not poor production.
That's not the point though. This particular post is asking for people's opinions, and poor taste or not, his opinion is just as valid as yours is. You can't ask for somebody's opinion and then mod them down for giving it simply because you don't agree with it.
"You and your third dimension."
A couple of posts mentioned Highlander 2, but without further explanation.
The reason that Highlander 2 is such a humongous pile of festering feces isn't that the movie as such is that bad. Yes, it's bad, but I've seen worse.
The reason is that the original movie was very nice and so the fans show up, dollar in hand, eager for a new foray into the magical world of Highlander. Only to be presented with... What?!
A movie that basically pisses all over the original story, while laughing. Inserting strange and idiotic pseudo-sci-fi "explanations" for the precense of the immortals, and even more so the precense of Sean Connery.
"We are both nutcases from the planet Zeist! Feel the Sickening!"
"Here I am, reborn for no good reason after a brutal slaying in scottish castle. Nice! Let's go shopping for clothes!"
"Look! Look!! Fear the evil hitmen from Zeist with bad-hair-day and hoover boards!
I'll stop now, before I vomit again.
Maybe this is the reason that Highlander III didn't acknowledge the events in #2, and just pretended that that movie didn't exist? ...like many people like to do.
I choose to remain celibate, like my father and his father before him.
What the *hell* were they thinking?
Episode I: A crazy rastafarian lizard hopping around a cartoon field going "okee-day" and avoiding humorous-sounding big blue "boomers". The worst child actor ever going "yipee!" as he accidentally blows up a ship's core reactor in the main hangar bay.
Episode II: Natalie & Hayden in Venice talking about sand and then 15 minutes of cartoon Jedis saying "look over there!" and pointing at cartoon storm troopers. Also a stupid "detective" story in a non-Star Wars-esque 1950s diner.
Episode III is up-in-the-air.
Wow, I didn't get through 15 minutes of it. It was by far the worst movie I've ever seen.
Must be one of the worst Sci-Fi flicks ever. The premise of the show is that the amoral scientists opened a gateway to Hell with their incautious experiments. Even more of a Luddite film than The Matrix or Terminator 2.
What many of these bad movies have in common is they were directed by the notorious Alan Smithee. I will never go to any more of his pictures. I wrote him and told him so.
Without a doubt, the worst movie I have ever seen.
ughh what a waste of film and DVD's and bandwidth by warez monkeys sharing it out on the net
Still can't believe Morgan Freeman stared in it, I bet he's still trying to wash the filth off of himself.
"WebTV: bringing the Internet into the shallow end of the gene pool since 1995" - Martin Bishop
Why mod anyone down for that comment?
Because Shrek is generally accepted as a funny, quality movie packed into a tight 90 minute package. If you don't like the movie, it's a matter of poor taste, not poor production.
Let me get this straight. If someone says something that contradicts the general consensus, then they must be a troll?
I know it is hard to imagine, but there are actually people out there who think for themselves instead of just repeating the party line.
He could be a troll, but the only way to tell would be to actually know what he thinks of Shrek, something which is basically impossible.
Mr. Saturday Night.
Worst movie I have ever seen.
As you can see, I don't like Mel Gibson at all. Except maybe Braveheart (It was exciting at least when I saw it maybe 7 years ago) all movies I saw with Mel Gibson were boring, ridiculous crap. Hollywood at its worst. I saw The Patriot, Signs and We Were Soldiers, all dumb propaganda crap. This is independent from this discussion about this Jesus movie, I haven't seen it.
There were only 3 people in the presentation, and I soon realized why :-(
Riiiiight... Except that the submitter asked
Do you understand what this means? The submitter is asking for an opinion. How can an opinion be wrong? You may disagree with it, but to label it a 'troll' since you disagree, especially when the commenter explained why they didn't like it, is, well, facist.
Of course, this is just my opinion. Jackass.
(tig)
Ignorance and prejudice and fear
Walk hand in hand
I swear that was the title to this when I saw it.
The thing that made it so memorable was that it was obviously edited together from a matinee serial sort of thing. Thing was, when putting in "next weeks episode" they'd edit out the intro, but not the re-cap of the previous 5 minutes of last weeks episode. Picture me, having seriously imbibed, watching with a group of friends being unable to comprehend why the video keeps looping back onto itself...
ambulance, starring Eric Roberts, James Earl Jones, and Stan Lee. Its the story of a comic book creator who falls in love with this woman who is taken away by an ambulance. It has the worest acting from James Earl Jones that I have ever seen.
I have made it a long term goal of mine to find the worst movie ever made...and I have quite a collection. If you are new to the 'genre' of crappy movies I would recommend that you check out http://badmovies.org/ for a pretty nice synopsis of some of the real stinkers out there.
In my personal opinion, The Crippled Masters, a kung-fu movie staring two parapeligics takes the cake, just barely beating out Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter (need I say more?)
Obviously this question is all about personal opinion, but if you are just looking for really bad films I would also check out Them Damn Zombies, Pirahna 2 (the spawning), and Troll 2.
Saw them both on a Sunday Double Feature in 1986. Worst 4 hours of my life.
Make me wanna see them all; especially the very worst. I've been quite bored with supposedly good movies failing to excite me.
AVP, hands down. Consider this, Aliens, Predators, but no Arnie and no Sigourney and on top of all this, a PG-13 rating. Why on earth did I go see this you ask? I had a free ticket from a DVD I bought. But was it worth it? No! I want my two hours back. ;)
I second Sophrosyne's opinion.
Hands down. (Yes, there is actually a movie by that name. It's on IMDB)
HAND.
I used to get together with friends and rent 4 or 5 really bad films from the Horror, Fantasy, or Science Fiction sections of the local video store. We had some remarkably good laughs over the years - there is some classicaly bad stuff that sneaks out in the direct to video category. Classic include the likes of "Deathstalker III: The Warriors from Hell", "The Unnammable (sic)", and the all time classic "Raiders of the Living Dead". In the end we stopped though. We hit a roadblock when we rented one particular film which was, quite simply, so bad it just wasn't funny anymore. The film quickly gained a cult status amongst our friends, and word of it slowly spread until I was seeing references to it from people I didn't know but had clearly heard of it through friends of frtiends etc. I still see mention of it every now and then. That film was "The Rollerblade Seven", and it is quite simply so bad that few comparisons can be made. It is incoherent (go on, rent it see it and then try and explain the plot!), mind numbing (no, literally!), and just.. well... I don't think there are quite words for it. I have never seen a film quite as bad. A few, such as "Zombie vs. the Mardi Gras" come close, but really, "The Rollerblade Seven" truly is another level of bad beyond anything you could quite imagine - you just have to actually watch it to understand.
Jedidiah.
Craft Beer Programming T-shirts
When I first got cable TV I subscribed to the premium movie channels for about 3 months. Almost every movie on those channels would make the list.
There's something about human nature that wants
to identify 'best' and 'worst' of things. Some
need to reduce the complexity of the world to
manageable levels in our brains I suppose. So
trying to pick the best or worst of something can
be an amusing game for awhile, and one may even
learn something new. But what's best or worst is,
of course, a matter of taste. For some of us,
it's hard to pick even an individual favorite or
most hated film (or book, or song, or
But why is it harder even to pick out the worst
movie of all time than the best, assuming such
a thing exists? Because fewer people will have
seen it to be able to make the judgement call.
In theory, theory and practice are the same; in practice they're different. (Yogi Berra & A. Einstein)
Worst thing I've ever seen. To me to be on the list - you have to be a movie from a major studio that has has an actor someone has heard of before.
I agree that it is a bad movie but the worst? Naw..
Obviously he was trying to something artsie with the petals and scenery. It's different. You've got something against pointy ears?
The sing-song dialogue is interesting to listen to. From the perspective of a kid, not a bad movie. One of the best devils I've ever seen in a movie.
Winterbeast
h tm
You all need to see this.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0103270/usercomments
http://www.b-independent.com/reviews/winterbeast.
The voices don't synch with the mouths. People are picked up by cheezy claymation monsters, and then become claymation themselves. The plot is non-existent, and not on purpose.
I've seen a lot of bad movies, and this takes the cake.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. The story is a dupe, the topic is boring, the facts weren't checked. WE GET IT!!
Oh, yeah, Tom Cruise. I didn't recognise him because he hadn't had his teeth fixed yet, and the general badness of the movie obscured his bad acting a bit.
Those are the only two movies I've ever walked out on. For most of the movies that have been listed here, I could at least sit through it and laugh at the director. My two choices lacked even that draw. In fact, I left Chariots of Fire during a rainstorm, prefering a long walk back to my car in the rain to waiting out the rain watching the movie.
Bother, said Pooh, as he called in an air strike.
I have seen Highlander 2 more times than I have seen Higlander one. Why? Because when it came out on VHS in the 80's my friends and I considered so funny as to be on par with Monty Python movies. The flim is just awful... Which is why I like it so much.
Another movie along the same thread is: Yor, the Hunter from the Future
Absolutely horrible as well. Therefore, I highly reccomend you get a bunch of friends and some beer, and rent this one too while ripping into it.
Try not to have too much of a good time.
Try to hack my 31337 firewall!
What makes this movie repellent is that we have all had to deal with someone like Wade in our lives, and are loath to be reminded of it. That and all the farting.
Bourne supremacy spoiler alert: One of the best things about this movie was that they killed off the love interest right away. Fantastic! American movies almost never do that. (Okay, okay, so we've all seen The Crow...)
In any case, if you rate Cherry 2000 and The Fifth Element strictly on babe factor, Cherry 2000 wins. I'd take the Pamela Gidley of 1987 over the Milla Jovovich of any year any day.
"You're right," Fisheye says. "I should have set it on 'whip' or 'chop.'"
i saw that! oh, wow. it was...honestly, not that terrible, and i was half there for the music anyway. i think the best part was when they take on the FVB (future villain band) and end up throwing steve tyler (yes, this *is* aerosmith) off a platform to his death. there are maybe 10 lines of dialogue in the whole thing; it's all music numbers. steve martin, alice cooper, and george burns (he dances!) also appear.
Yep I paid $25 for this treat. Worst movie I've ever seen, only one to ever make me uncomfortable and turn my stomach. It got me band from ever showing any movies at our friday night movie parties. I have to date met only 2 people that actually liked the movie, and married one of them. Of course, I like this movie. It represents the epitome of troma movie magic. Part of my most prized platinum collection. I love this godawful movie.
1.Netcraft confirms:In Soviet Russia all your base welcomes a beowolf cluster of CowboyNeal overlords. 2.? 3.Profit!!1!
The Star Wars Holiday Special.
If you've seen it, there's no way you can disagree.
You've got all the coked-out Star Wars stars, including Luke with original nose, plus Bea Arthur and Chewbacca's son Lumpy. There's an extended sequence of what can only be called wookie porn, and large sections where the wookies talk amongst themselves with no subtitle or translation provided.
-R
Hands down the worst I've seen is Hardware. I saw it in college, a time in my life when I liked a lot of lousy, gory movies (Rabid Grannies, Street Trash) and by the time the credits rolled, I was wishing I was carrying a knife with which to gouge out my own eyeballs. The pain would have been less.
I did, but it was on Sky Movies[1], and I don't pay the Sky subscription.
God, it's pretty bad sci-fi. It's obviously strait to video fodder. No redeeming features, bad direction, stupid blue filters everywhere. Not a very interesting story either.
And then the millenia old Harrier Jump-jets turn up. That still work, despite the oodles of millenia they've been lying around. They then manage to fly one of the hardest to fly aircraft in existance with no training.
I can't remember what happens at the end apart from the evil bad guy being locked up in Fort Knox, and the alien planet blowing up, but I'm in no rush to watch the film again. Ever.
Gah!
I still want a refund, despite not paying anything to see it.
[1] Well, it was actually Sky Moviemax as it was before Moviemax and Premiere were merged into one set of channels. Sky loves changing the names of it's movie channels every couple of years.
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Another list of bottom-200 movies can be found at Everyone's a Critic (free registration required), select Movie Rankings from the menu. The current bottom-5 is Battlefield Earth, Spice World, Freddy Got Fingered, Glitter and Leonard Part 6.
There was a maze that wasn't a maze (it was just a straight path), there were poorly-animated dragons, there was Jeremy Irons and Thora Birch making fools of themselves, and just when you thought Marlon Wayans is dead, he came back to life! Augghh!
Alternate theory: The Tom Cruise Effect. Think about this a moment, when have you seen a watchable Tom Cruise movie lately?
Mission Impossible was just horrible. If Arnie is running from guys on skis with machine guns in True Lies, I can buy it. Most of the Bond actors, for that matter. If Jackie Chan does it, hell, he's probably doing it for real. But Cruise? I'm more of an action hero than he is. It had all the credibility that Chuck Norris has in Walker, Texas Ranger when they tripletake the spin kick that knocks the badguy out 5 minutes from the end... no, wait, it has less credibility than that. Chuck Norris probably could do decent action again, if he wanted to.
Eyes Wide Shut: Ok, Kubrick is on his death bed, conscious for only moments at a time. A worshipful film student is trying to extract the essentials for his last great film. Doctors and nurses bustling around. Suddenly, Kubrick sits upright in bed explosively, screaming "******* Tom Cruise". Maybe a car backfired down the street at that split second, obscuring the prefix "anyone but".
Minority Report: We do get to see Cruise's ripped out eyeballs, but until it's more interactive and the audience gets to do the mutilation themselves, it's only a small gratification. Where to begin? Yet another horrible movie of a cool Dick short, the director must also piss on the Mona Lisa and say that it improves the painting. Can anyone believe that his young son was kidnapped, murdered, maybe even violated beforehand when Cruise always has that "gee, I like to eat shit" grin on his face? In a day and age where all action sequences look contrived, how does he consistently manage to stand out with this ultra-contrived bullshit?
I would describe others too, but why be so redundant? Better to give you the formula.
Tom Cruise is a an ace (examples: fighter pilot, bartender, race car driver) whose star is rising, but he falls into a spiritual malaise that only a good woman can bring him out of. (Note: Formula only applies to pre-1995 career, effects of scientology perhaps?)
Prediction: Tom Cruise will star in the new L. Ron Hubbard film adapation.
Artfully executed, perhaps, but way more unpleasant than a really badly done movie, because those can be funny. It's about a woman who is disowned by wealthy parents for marrying her uncle, but then when her husband dies she gets an offer of reinstatement in the family if she gets rid of the kids (tainted offspring, testament to the corrupt union) and so the movie is about how they lock the children in the attic and then begin to kill them. Horribly unpleasant.
The recent movie "The Hours," while doubtless very artful, was also pretty darn unpleasant.
A movie that is incredibly hilarious because of its badness is Lou Ferrigno in "Sinbad of the Seven Seas."
'Manos' and the Hands of Fate must've been truly terrible: four of its cast members committed suicide after its release in 1966:
John Reynolds, Diane Mahree, Sherry Proctor, and Joyce Molleur.
There are a lot of bad movies that people are mentioning here, but there is one TRULY bad movie that goes beyond into uncharted territory and makes Gigli seem as entertaining as naked girls at Linux World. It's called 555, and it's about a weird hippie dude who kills 5 chicks for 5 nights every 5 years. I has wonderful video-shot scenes of him having sex with decapitated rubber dolls with purple blood squirting out of their necks.
This movie follows in the tradition of Truth or Dare, a flick about people mutilating themselves for fun in a psychotic game of truth or dare (!?!?)
LS
There is a fine line between being a cultivated citizen and being someone else's crop. - A. J. Patrick Liszkie
Personally I really hated "Dr. T and the women!"
;-)
Robert Altman made some pretty good movies, but this wasn't it. The "women" are the most annoying of their kind and the whole story feels absolutely pointless. The ending, where Richard Gere gets carried away by a hurricane and dropped in a mexican city where the doctor continues to help the local women is ridiculous to say the least. The acting is ok, but why watch such a terribly long and boring movie when there is absolutely no identifiable storyline?
I wish the movie would have been "Mr. T. and the women". That could have been a lot more fun.
Tubby the Tuba is, without a doubt, the worst animated film ever made. I worked for the producer at the time, but fortunately I didn't have anything to do with the movie.
-Tom Duff
Many "worst movies of all time" lists tend to not include the absolute worst ones ever made. Many obscure poorly done films are overlooked, and instead these lists will only put in the bad films that will be remembered. In fact, we could sum most of these lists up to be really lists of 3 things: 1) most disappointing hyped-up films, 2) most memorable bad films, and 3) worst recent films.= Reply&threshold=2&commentsort=0&tid=186&mode=neste d&pid=9968333
http://ask.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=117776&op
And to all of you. Wouldnt it be nice to include title of the movie in the post near link to IMDB. Half of post here are not easy to read as they dont include the title of the movie in post.
Star Wars Holiday Special.
But even I cannot tolerate the Master of the Universe movie. Combine Dolph Lungren in a role that requires acting (instead of the cold emotionless machine in Rocky IV) with even worse actors, and terrible use of the He-Man source material (which was questionable material to begin with, made only exponentially worse with every deviation made from it)... and you get The Worst Movie I've Ever Seen.
There are a number of other movies I've seen that could compete, but avoid consideration due to the "+5, Female Nudity" modifier.
http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0088772/
a film with no plot, no characters and no apparent acting. the only reason I didn't fall asleep is due to the suspense of assuming that something was going to happen. At all. Anything would have done.
But that is YOUR opinion. My opinion is that I like Shrek, but that doesn't stop someone else from thinking it is dumb. Hell, my wife hated Lord of the Rings.. you guys would probably stone her to death. :-)
Moulin Rouge was certainly not the worst movie ever, but it was "cheap" nonetheless. It was like macaroni and cheese or, at best, a pizza.
The five minutes I saw of Batman and Robin is the worst movie I've ever seen.
Hell, my wife hated Lord of the Rings.. you guys would probably stone her to death. :-)
No - she's a obviously a witch. Now what do with do with witches?
BURN THEM!
;-)
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20 GOTO 10
Only movie I've ever walked out of.
"dope will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no dope"
In this specific case I'd tend to agree with the claim that it was a troll, but not for the same reason.
What caught my eye was the comment that the animation looked like a beta version of A Toy Story, and unless he was viewing a test-copy of the rendering for the movie, that statement is simply untrue and an obvious clue to the intent of the poster.
The point I wanted to make was that without evidence like that, there's no real way to claim for sure that he was trying to be an ass, even if the movie is widely accepted as "good", perhaps relevant experiences in one's own life would lead them to strongly dislike it. Who knows.
I mean WHAT THE HELL were they thinking? Oh my Gord... First we somehow get DNA which causes a human to grow with a DIFFERENT creature inside (and I don't know no DNA that can do that). Second, we got the DNA from the inside of a lead smelter. Third, it takes a further hundred and fifty years to get it right. Fourth, they mis-spelled the name of the company in every bloody scene. Fifth, WHAT IN THE HOLY HELL was that piece-of-crap Rex-the-Wonder-Preemie-wannabe reject fetus alien at the end? Nothing, not even the end of Akira, has made my stomach heave like that. Also, just for the record, I liked Street Fighter more than this. Honest to Gord. Street Fighter.
I like to place meaningful quotes in my sig, so people will know that I know what meaningful quotes are.
Seriously, most Just-add-ninja movies should be on this list. Just watch Ninja Terminator or Ninja Squad and you'll understand. (Altough you do laugh your head off as well...)
I can think of a number of BAD films...
The Attack of the the eye creatures (yes, it is spelled like that in the title of the film!)
They Saved Hitler's Brain (day to night ot day to night in a single driving scene)
Transylvania 6-5000 (Embarasing for all involved)
Mission to Mars (One of the most derivative movies I have seen in a long time.)
Kingdom of the Spiders (Not just because it had William Shatner. It also had one of the worst plot resolutions I had seen in a while.)
Robot Monster (A gorilla in a diving helmet?)
Night of the Lepus ("I'm a Doctor, not a giant rabbit!")
There are many more...
"Trademarks are the heraldry of the new feudalism."
I think anyone can make a bad film. Sure it would be bad but to make something really bad you have to fall from a high place. Take the original Matrix. Good movie. Lots of potential for sequels and prequels. Look what the brothers W did with such potential. They made two of the worst movies I've ever seen on multiple levels. As far as falling from a very high place they the worst in my mind. Thanks a lot boys. :|
Speak truth to power.
Lookily they brought it back to the big screen. Yet, to waste another generations time and money.
>> Had I been going to bed earlier every night? Have I been sleeping later? Has Tyler been in charge longer and l
I believe Moulin rouge is one of those very movies.
You still don't get it. Here's another clue-by-4. The point is to find a movie that the most of the people hate the most. Not the movie _you_ dislike the most.
Regardless of how much you hate Moulin Rouge you must have noticed that quite a few people, myself not included however, actually did like it, enough for it to never qualify as the worst movie ever.
Moreover, I'm dead certain it wasn't the worst movie you've seen, unless you seen only a few dozen movies. It wasn't for me eiher, there was absolutely nothing for me. But hell, I'm first to admit that there are far more agonizing movies out there that are virtually meant for no one.
1 Earth is warming, 2 It's us, 3 it's royally bad, 4 we need to take action NOW
Super Mario Brothers is the only movie I've ever walked out of the theatre due to lack of quality. I was 12 at the time, I had a greater tolerance for a shitty plot.
You could waste your money other ways, though. Like posting on Slashdot.
Braveheart. If not the worst movie of all time, then certainly the most overrated!
There are bad movies and there are bad movies that are meant to be bad. I'm referring to campy movies like Attack of the Killers Tomatoes. Those movies are fun to watch. Movies like First Knight, my vote for worst movie I've ever seen, are not meant to be bad, and that makes them even more excruciating.
That's gotta fit into your schema somewhere
Jeremy Irons, I am sure is kicking himself for taking this part. His cut scene was the best .We have Irons casting a spell in the tower during the dragon attack , he standing there hands raised over his head scream,and screaming, and then he dead silent and drops his hands to his side and you see it click in his head "I look like an ASSHAT", and stormed off the set.
Marlon Wayans is in it. You know him form all those great films:
I'm Gonna Git You Sucka (1988)
Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood (1996)
Scary Movie (2000)
White Chicks (2004)
Justin Whalin the lead in DnD is none other then Jimmy Olsen from Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman. Not a bad actor just not a leading man. I mean you have Jermey freaking Irons as the antagonist you need a eqaully stong protagonist.
Bruce Payne as Iron's evil sidekick that wears silver lipstick yes folks the man that is to be the basest of the bad is wearing lipstick. Now if the part would have been for a female I wouldn't have given it another thought. I am sorry but it made him look like a chrome sucking pansy then a badass thug.
The Good NEWS:
It is the best drinking game. Just switch the DVD to Commentary track and anytime you hear the words "Crane" or "Dougie" just drink. I swear to god in the first 20 minutes you will be so drunk you start to like the film or you will be rushed to the ER.
The Bad NEWS:
There is a sequeal.
http://imdb.com/title/tt0406728/
Courtney Solomon, The man that directed this piece of trash and what else has he done?
http://imdb.com/name/nm0813309/
Life is marked by pain.
What a putrid pile of filth. I thought, "Gee, it must be at least unintentionally funny." I was wrong.
Starring Chris Elliot, in case you've never heard of it.
---If you can't trust a nerd, who can you trust?
(And I'm excluding all the MST3Ks)
The worst movie of all time...
Ever....
Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0078239/
Starring the Bee Gees and Peter Framption
George Burns
Paul Nicholas
Frankie Howard
Donald Pleasance
Steve Martin
Alice Cooper
Aerosmith
Earth Wind and Fire*
All of whom (* excepted) murder the entire repetoire of the Beatles in a plot created entirely to string song titles together.
It truely shows the power of the Robert Stigwood Organisation, or cocaine, or both, or something like that.
"You know you want me baby!" - Crow T Robot
Steven Seagal. 'nuff said
Hey, I liked Moulin Rouge... but I also liked Star Trek Insurrection... well, parts of it.
... well, is a typical Bohemian story of impossible love ending badly. Sure, it was cheesy at times, but overall I felt is was welldone. I found the use of pop music interesting - particularly the Tango Roxanne. That was probably one of songs that was truly improved by the movie over the original (and I like the Police).
I think Moulin Rouge appeals to a limited set of people. I actually enjoyed the vivid overload of colors and wished I had seen that in the theatre. The story
Now a *bad* movie would be any of the Death Stalker movies - particularly the one with Queen Kong.
McHale's Navy
Meet the Parents
Both for being insipidly boring, utterly predictable, transparently manipulative, soulless, and plain stupid.
It sucks as a drama, it sucks bigtime as love story, it bores you to death and the music is a waste of sound waves...
Kung Pow: Enter the Fist!
Now that was a bad movie. Bad, but pretty damn funny.
Me and a couple of mates used to occasionally (and deliberately) rent the worst sci-fi/horror movie we could find at the local video store.
These were the kind of movies that drove you to drink. Cheesy special effects really add to a movie.
Of those, there were several spoofs that didn't really make it. They were probably the worst. Lobster Man from Mars and Amazon Women on the Moon come to mind.
Of the others, C.H.U.D. springs to mind. For months, people were asking us what a CHUD was.
All together now:
"Cannabilistic! Humanoid! Underground! Dweller!"
So does Anonymous Coward have good karma?
But I don't quite remember the name, though.
What are the most unnoticed bad and good movies?
John Reynolds (Torgo), Diane Mahree(Margaret), and Sherry Proctor (Masters Wife #2) all committed suicide in 1966 (The year Manos was released), with Reynolds' and Proctor's suicides being listed as taking place in El Paso, TX.
The plot and effect where bad enough, but the gang where hateful caricatures of the originals. They where purposefully made into mean, shallow idiots in a disgusting and transparent effort to 'moderinize' Scooby Doo and once again appeal to America's lowest denomiator. The amount of inappropriate humor in the movie was appalling, and the thought of anyone laughing at it sickens me. Never in my life have I had my Childhood so completely and methodically raped. My one regret is Filthy didn't review it. He's so much better at tearing apart movies than me.
Hi! I make Firefox Plug-ins. Check 'em out @ https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/youtube-mp3-podcaster/
Mad Max.
Road Warrior.
(I'll pretend Thunderdome was never made, though)
Hell Goes to Frogtown starring Rowdy Roddy Piper is so bad no one has seen it except those who go out to watch bad movies on purpose (but not MST3K movies, those are different).
And yes, we did in fact attempt to find the worst movies, and watch them. Our only rule was that we had to find it on DVD, which supposedly limited it to movies that weren't completely obscure.
only on /. would torvalds be in the ranks with men such as einstein and tesla
Game Overdrive - Gaming News
Worst movie I ever saw was something I rented in the early 90's, and it was called Roller-something. It was a movie about a post-apoctalyptic world where girls in tight shorts and t-shirts in rollerskates (yes rollerskates, not rollerblades) skated around on the surface randomly stabbing people as they walked in parks. There was an evil character who had a little head growing out of his chest that gave him orders, and he ruled an underground community and he was trying to find a way to take over the surface people. Man it was bad, it literally looked like it was filmed on a $500 camera, and the end credits listed the same person for actor, cameraman, editor, director, etc.
After that movie, the worst move I saw was Cabin Boy. Star Trek V ranks pretty far up there too.
... from watching stuff like that, at least when it comes to older releases
Ziggy's Video Realm.
Not only does the guy tend to be right on with my tastes (yours may vary), but he's funny. Reading the reviews of the bad stuff is a helluvalot more entertaining than actually watching it--not to say that picking one's nose wouldn't be, but, um, more entertaining than $FUN_ACTIVITY.
I've got a lot of stuff from him in my quotefile. Hmmm, let's see... From a review of some godawful Jalal Merhi movie: "Forget mere "suspension" of disbelief here; it went bungee jumping and the cable broke."
I rest my case.
You happened to remind me of Travolta and the last film I saw him act in. Swordfish, Yuck... I mean that's really the worst I've seen. I would have been very very sad if I had seen it in a theater.
;)
Can you imagine what the holyweed `finnish' sounds to a finn?
- Voice of Ambience -
What ? "The Opposite of Sex" is a "fucking film" ?
The movie Ed Wood is all bout making this. It is funny as hell.
It really is a crappy movie but at the same time you just can't stop watching because it is so funny. To beleive that someone actually thought up the plot of this movie...
Horrible
Humor from a Genetically Molested Mind
Ahhh, Battlefield Earth. I just recently saw this (my video store has a rent-2, get-2-free policy so, no, I didn't have to pay money for it) and realized that this had to be the worst, most ludicrous movie ever made.
There were actually some pretty cool special effects, but my god, the dialogue. The plot! Consider:
* The evil planetary overlord, trying to crack down on the earthling slave workers in the mines (paraphrased): "We'll cut their pay if they don't cooperate!" Read this line again. Consider that the suggestion is made at least twice.
* The heroes escape, with a gun. After a chase, they come face to face with Terl. Terl tells them, essentially, "You can't win, you know. You should give up." They say "You're right" and *hand him the gun*.
* At some point, Terl gives the escaping heroes a gun. They do not use it on him.
* Terl decides the best way to keep the humans in line is via the time-honored method of taking the smartest, most independent one and teaching him your entire language and technology.
* To pull off a plot to mine gold for his own nefarious purposes, Terl takes these same educated, rebellious humans, gives them a badass fighting ship, and sends them off on their own, saying "come back with some gold, now".
* Apparently, the aliens can believe that humans are capable of building a modern technological society, but the idea of a human learning how to mine gold is so inconceivable as to cause fits of laughter every time it's mentioned.
* Every character, at some point, is required to wear a set of two foot long string-tie-like apparatus clipped to their nose - humans when they breate the alien atmosphere, aliens when breathing Earth atmosphere. These are never explained. They also never get tangled or wrapped around anything, regardless of the amount of running through and fighting in the underbrush.
I actually suspect that this movie was meant to be a spoof. Otherwise there is absolutely no way to believe that someone could put every single bad movie cliche into one movie.
Java: the bastard demon spawn of C++ and Ada
The worst movie ever, by far, is Incubus, starring William Shatner, filmed in Esperanto.
I do have to reccomend Shatner's commentary track. (In fact, my usual inflicting of this movie involves switching the audio over to the commentary track at the earliest opportunity, as the movie is subtitled and noone understands esperanto anyway.)
There is the "worst movie that I was looking forward to", i.e. one that I thought I might enjoy, but was horribly, horribly disappointed at. That would have to be Highlander 2.
And then there's just plain bad. I'm thinking that would be The Cars that Ate Paris. (and no, it's not a porno about a 70's Boston rock band's sexual escapades with a vapid blonde heiress. That might have at least been funny.)
Pound! Bang! Bin! Bash! is this a shell script or a Batman comic?
That movie is so bad you hear the creaking sound of the styrofoam 'rocks' when they hit people...
If a train station is a place where a train stops, what's a workstation?
What the fuck does lines of coke snorted or bottles of hard liquor drunk have to do with your ability to govern a nation? I hate dubya's cluelessness as much as the next guy but supporting war-on-drugs propaganda puts you solidly in the same asinine class.
He did the crime, he didn't do the time, he wants others to do the time for the same "crime" he commited.
Willingness to commit crimes, getting away with them, and prosecuting others harshly for something you did yourself is relevant to your ability to be a good leader.
Just saying : )
You can't take the sky from me...
Steve de Jarnatt's Cherry 2000, and his Miracle Mile, are two of the few low-budget SF movies of the 80s that were worth their price of admission. What was it you found so bad about Cherry? Melanie Griffith make you nervous or something?
I survived the Dick Cheney Presidency 7 to 9 AM 7-21-07
Just because it's an AC post you don't have to automatically assume it's a GNAA recruitment drive.
Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot is a movie, funnily enough. It is also ranked at number 68 in IMDB's bottom 100 films poll, so it is therefore deemed the worst movie ever seen by many people (Not including myself as I quite liked it, although I was about 12 when I first saw it so the thought of an old lady buying an Uzi was rather amusing. Come to think of it, I'm not sure whether I'd like it more or less if I watched it again)
Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
Zardoz!!! Actually, I can't decide if it's the worst movie or the best, but it certainly makes me feel like something in my brain broke after watching it.
http://www.commaecho.com
I had forgotten about that piece of shit...damn that was bad.
Oh god, flashbacks of its badness...
NO! Mod parent down! We must not be reminded of the horrorible movie! Its unclean!
You can't take the sky from me...
You're kidding right? Just try and count the 100% reviews here
Like being kicked in the head by a donkey as a child...
Woo being the director Doesn't mean much. Watch The Killer (Die xue shuang xiong) terrible to say the least.
Game Overdrive - Gaming News
It was so bad technically. The astronut survived in Mars by growing food in a greenhouse, which was in a tent that was flapping in the wind? Sure, that's likely to happen.
Luckily, I didn't have to pay for it as MIT's student movie theater, LSC showed it as a sneak preview, just before its release, IIRC.
I can't believe no one has mentioned this one.
;-).
Think about it! What other movie in history has shattered the memories of childhood of an entire generation.
And no, this is not mean't to be funny! It is rather insightfull really
Cheers
Adolfo
"what kind of a person just sits around with a blank, lost expression on his face after hearing of the terrorist attacks on 9/11? While almost every OTHER American leapt to his or her feet in swift alert, he waited around stupidly for somebody to tell him what to do! Some leader indeed!" Oh WOW man... Well... Where to start... I guess the usual "Damned if you do, damned if you don't" speech... "I can't believe he just left like that... panicking and leaving the children frightened..." That's all I got there. And, at least where I watched it, everyone was shocked still. Class was cancelled until like 2 hours later, because no one was going anyway... Because everyone was just blown away by the enormity of it. Jesus... people expect presidents not to be human or do human things... Was I appalled at Clinton because of Monica? Yeah, but I don't think it was necessarily something that makes him a bad president. Do I think Mrs. Kerry is a bitch for telling someone to "shove it"? No. Do I think Cheney (It was Cheney right?) should be reprimanded for telling someone to fuck off? Nope. I'm glad he showed some emotion and that he was human. I wouldn't want him to make a habit of it though. Do I give a fuck that Kerry came back and betrayed other veterans after Vietnam? I don't agree with that, but I don't think that will really matter with his presidency. And do I think President George W. Bush is in any way unfit for duty because, oh my God, he was shocked by what happened on September 11? NO! Why the hell would that mean anything? We were all shocked. Many of us were paralyzed. And if you could just go on functioning and thinking clearly the moment after you heard about it, you are soulless. Amazing how F-9/11 still "convinced" people of things even after Moore's blatant lying without actually speaking a lie, and just through serial misrepresentation was brought out after Bowling for Columbine. Fahrenheit gets my vote for worst movie ever. Well, perhaps it doesn't. Michael Moore just gets my vote for most immoral person in the movie industry. And George W. Bush will be getting my vote for the presidency of the United States.
What was it you found so bad about Cherry?
Other than the acting, the dialogue, the editing and the plot... nothing much.
Melanie Griffith make you nervous or something?
I dunno, is it possible to be nervous while laughing hysterically?
News for Nerds. Stuff that Matters? Like hell.
Howard the Duck.
*thinks about oversized duck condoms*
eww *shudder*
It was like my 10th birthday or something, and I wanted to see something else. Me and 10 other kids sat through a fricking 3 hour sports documentary. Worst birthday ever. Damn you, Hoop Dreams!
it had TWO suquels!?
Yes, a movie based on the book. You might not have thought it existed, but it does.
You gotta find first gear in your giant robot car
There is an anime movie, the name is "Grey: Digital Target". I've heard good things about the manga, but after watching the movie I can safely say it is the worst evar.
The GeekNights podcast is going strong. Listen!
I dunno what it was supposed to be... It was like a gay porn that just never...quite....got there. In fact, the only sucking was done by, yes, alas, giant mutant leeches (and, I suppose, the screenplay writers and production crew, but they weren't ever on camera).
I guess there was actually supposed to be a plot, but... I dunno. It was just terrible.
And Eurotrip was awful. Anyone else see that?
This pseudo-intellectual waste of time only makes sense if you subscribe to the philosophy that freewill is a sham, everything is predetermined, etc. It's utter tripe, I want my 113 minutes back.
42. "Police Academy 6: City Under Siege (1989)"
48. "Police Academy 5: Assignment: Miami Beach (1988)"
94. "Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (1987)"
and 'Police Academy' set for eighth edition. I think they're trying to break into the top ten.
"I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity but they've always worked for me" - HST
The movie "Jakarta" definitdly goes on the short list of BAD movies, and it's hard to top this memorable line:
[Cheezy detective voiceover monolog:]
"I had a head full of dizzy and a headache on call waiting."
-
- - You can't take something off the Internet! That's like trying to take pee out of a swimming pool.
Well, I kept thinking, "It can't get any worse, so it must get better." Little did I know a movie could be so consistently and thoroughly bad...
"Dave, I stand still--the conclusions jump to me!" - Bill McNeal, NewsRadio
Night of the Lepus is cult classic. I loved it when I was a kid :)
To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Newmar
The only movie I've ever walked out of.
_.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._.:*~*:._
ASCII art?? I thought it was a REGULAR expression
Did anybody ever sit and watch "House of the Dead". I got halfway through and fell asleep. It was made especially worse by the cutscenes with clips from the arcade game.
Comment removed based on user account deletion
Meet the Feebles, one of Peter Jackson's early movies (his second, iirc), is the worst movie I've ever seen. Dead Alive was a riot, but Meet the Feebles makes such masterpieces as Plan 9 and Gigli look like, well, masterpieces. The second worst is Coven, pronounced coe-ven, which was the movie produced (or rather excreted) by the stars of the documentary American Movie (a wonderful, hilarous, truth-is-stranger-than-fiction film). The third worst is The Double-D Avenger, about a superheroine whose powers come from certain parts of her anatomy, as suggested by the title. It is not a porno, but has all the plot and acting of one. Coven is better than American Movie leads you to expect, and The Double-D Avenger is at least amusingly bad, but Meet the Feebles is simply irredeemable.
The original Howling Frog is a fictional character and has no UID.
Arnold Schwarzeneggar pregnant. How, how, how did this man become the governor of my state?
[IMBD Ref: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0089901/]
has always floated on my top 10 worst movies list. No one seems to remember it anymore and none of the local video shoppes seem to bother carrying it. It's painful enough to want to see again and again and again...
Mind the gap...
Kevin Costner's "The Postman" By far the most horrific movie ever made. And at 3 hours, Mr. Costner should not only be ashamed of himself, but should seriously think of getting a labotomy...
I'll agree, that list given has some stinkers on it. Case in point: Grease. How could Olivia Neutron-Bomb go from pristine and pure, to a total sleazebucket, just so she could date John Revolting? Get real! Grease 2 had a better story line, at least, and the acting wasn't much worse.
:(
... until I saw Dune. See, Caligula at least had some thirty seconds of redeeming value in it. Dune had none. Dune was just plain gross and nauseating, for the sheer joy of being gross and nauseating. The book was pretty good, but the film sucked huge, diseased donkey schlongs. Ick.
However, the list doesn't cover my two worst-ever movies. I'm sorry to say that I paid to see both of them, and felt terribly cheated both times.
The first one is Caligula. Drawn to it by the photo spread in Penthouse (yes, lesbians do read that stuff), I later found out that the whole lesbian scene was added after the movie was finished, essentially over the director's dead body. If you saw the magazine spread, you saw nearly every frame of film. The rest of the movie was gross and nauseating. A total waste of ten bucks, and a trip into Chicago to the "art" theater at which it was shown. Very definately NOT a good date flick.
For many years, Caligula was tops
Thankfully, by that time, I had no grrlfriend, so at least I was spared the devastation of being dumped as we left the theater.
Lemon curry?
If I had a list, id put that near the top of horrors that never should've been made.
A bunch of ignorant cavemen 2000 years in the future discover 20th century weapons such as fighter planes and armored vehicles. They somehow still work perfectly fine after 2000 years of sitting dormant. And in 5 days they learn how to pilot them skillfully enough to destroy the vastly superior aliens.
And of course the aliens only vulnerability is radiation, so a nuke destroys their entire atmosphere and planet. Nevermind the cosmic radiation that would continually bombard the planet having no effect...
pure garbage. no decent plot. horrible acting.
-
Yeah. but among those- Killdozer was probably the worst.
Plot? A bunch of construction equipment becomes possessed thanks to a meteor. The worst(best?) part is that the good guys are getting chased by...um...bulldozers. Which, in case you never noticed, can be outrun by my grandmother- without her walker.
Please help metamoderate.
Ays Kreem fi Gliim (Ice Cream at Gleem), an Egyptian musical with Amr Diab (i think), has got to be one of the most wretched movies i've ever seen! Bluck! (Hint: not all bad movies come from Hollywood.)
Molly Ringwald plays a grubby orphan on a planet run by disease-ridden overlords. There's also something involving three nubile women captured by the overlords, but they're just a plot device -- pay no attention to them.
Michael Ironside (as usual) plays the villain.
I saw it in 3-D, where you had to wear the polarized glasses. Got the biggest headache of the year that afternoon from those damned things.
Chip H.
Mainly because it was such a bad adaptation combined with just a bad bad movie.
* Winners compare their achievements to their goals, losers compare theirs to that of others.
Terrible, terrible, terrible in every way. Of course, the thing that bothered me most was that Bernie seemed to be immune from decomposition. The only saving grace was that I saw it for free because my friend worked at the theatre. On the other hand, that hour and a half of my life is gone forever. And in case you're wondering, I did not choose to see this movie. I was hanging out with my friend and his friends from work. They chose the movie, and I suffered. Some of them actually thought it was funny. Clearly, intelligence is not a requirement for working at a movie theatre.
Xanadu (1980). Oh, the horror.
Washington, DC: It's like Hollywood for ugly people.
It's easy to spot people who are criticizing that movie without having seen it. They regurgitate some talking points without adding anything personal. That would be credible if the talking points were a knock-down ironclad rebuttal, but they always seem to miss the forest for the trees. To anyone who's actually seen the movie, they sound like: "Aha! Moore shows Bush hugging the Saudi ambassador and implies that it happened in the Oval Office. In fact, it happened in Saudi Arabia." Most of it is beside the point and "debunks" things that I neither believed nor thought that the film was trying to make me believe.
I don't buy Moore's conspiracy theories, but the film has a lot more to offer. The re-creation of the attacks is the most propagandistic part of the film, but it's also the best and the least anti-Bush. If you haven't seen the movie, watch it for that--and for the interviews. Moore spends a surprising amount of time with his own mouth closed.
-- . . ramblin' . . .
Why do people make porn that's impossible to masturbate to?
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085764
Horrible acting, horrible story, stereotypes abound, great arcade scenes.
"You're getting brutal, Sark. Brutal and needlessly sadistic."
"Thank you, Master Control"
-Sark and the MCP
Really? I thought the movie was great in it's own warped way (obviously it was completely nonsensical). I liked the Japanese Nazis riding muscle cars in Louxembourg, to keep their WWII hostage Abraham Lincoln. It's fun to read the IMDB reviews.
Slashdot: providing anti-social weirdos a soapbox, since 1997.
If I remember correctly, didn't Transylvania 6-5000 have its own (really annoying) theme song?
Intercarve Networks, LLC
By the way, it was MUCH better than Alien 3 or Resurrection. PREDATORS ROCK!
WHO NEEDS SHIFT WHEN YOU HAVE CAPSLOCK/ DAMN1
Morgan Fairchild, '81. The mall rotated it in with the movie I actually went there to see. I love really, really bad cinema and this is literally the only movie I have ever walked out on:
http://www.rottentomatoes.com/vine/showthread.p
For my tastes, the runner-up goes to:
"The Black Hole might take a certain amount of sympathy to squeak by nowadays (the film was a post-Star Wars rush job and looks it - there are visible wires on the robots)"
http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=311
Caused me to rush out a side exit during the credits in the hope I wouldn't see anybody I knew waiting for the next showing. With the exception of Ed Wood, the Black Hole has left a putrid taste in my mouth for anything Disney to this day.
Not only was it a stupid, inane and pointless piece of self-indulgence, but when the director realized what a lump of shit he had wrought, he decided to dub over everyone's voice in a different language. Per character. Including Esperanto. And "rap language". And Pig Latin.
Oh god. I'm shaking.
cat in the hat is the worst movie ever made
They're using their grammar skills there.
The worst movies I've had the misfortune to see are
Cry-Baby (1990)
Honey, I Blew Up the Kid (1992)
Serial Mom (1994)
Ultimate Ninja, The (1986)
Beyond the Stars (1989)
Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home (1986)
The Ultimate Ninja is a low-budget cross-cut of two different movies. I saw this one because a friend of mine collects bad movies. Is this intended to be funny?
The Voyage Home and Beyond the Stars are about saving our whale overlords, and the latter has the bonus feature of running out of money before they could finish it.
Cry-Baby, Serial Mom and Honey, I Blew Up the Kid... have no excuse.
There was this movie being made in the Netherlands that I anticipated to make the worst movies list, but they ran out of money and were hit by a strike. Production was halted. Just as well, since the movie was about Paul Watson's merry band blowing stuff up, and after 9/11 direct action activism isn't quite as popular as it was before.
Irene KHAAAAAAN!
In my opinion, Starship Troopers (1997; 6.6) is definitely not great, and it's really not even very good; however, it is slightly better than average, and it is far from being a bad movie. It's on my "middle shelf" of DVDs. Consider this a rejection of your claim that it's one of the worst movies ever.
By the way, here are my top 25 movies (with year, IMDB score and rank). Note that I personally do not differentate them; they're all at least 4.5 out of 5 stars in my book.
Note: The mean score on IMDB is currently 6.8. The only movies in my top 25 that are below the IMDB mean are misunderstood comedies with interesting social commentary: Hudson Hawk (42% rated it 7 or better), Mars Attacks! (51% rated it 7 or better) and Toys (30% rated it 7 or better).
Also note: I have about 140 other DVDs, including at least 20 more of the IMDB top 250 (* I don't have star wars on DVD yet). My "top shelf" of DVDs also includes: Almost Famous, American Beauty, Apocalypse Now, Backdraft, Blade Runner, Braveheart, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Curse of the Jade Scorpion, Good Will Hunting, LA Confidential, Magnolia, Mission Impossible, O Brother where art thou?, Pulp Fiction, Rounders, Saving Private Ryan, Shakespeare in Love, Shrek, the Spanish Prisoner, Titanic and Unforgiven.
p.s. I watched Alien (good) and Aliens (good) two weeks ago, Alien 3 (bad) and Alien 4 (bad) last weekend, then City Slickers (decent) last night. I'll probably watch Hook, a League of their Own or Medicine Man tonight, depending on my mood.
House of the Dead must be the worst movie I have ever seen. For starters, there's the "Rave of the Century" which has 15 people attending. I swear I've been to birthday parties for 13 year olds that were more happening. Next the zombies are friggin acrobats that can jump high into the air, ignore the trampolines on screen. The constant video game screens from the actual game are annoying. And the showdown where everyone gets a their own "bullet time" showcase to kick ass for 2 minutes was never cool. I used to think Street Fighter the movie was the worst movier ever! But House of the Dead takes the cake. They don't even get to the House until the end of the movie. Should have been called Island of the Lame Ass Shitty Monsers.
Here's my little theory on MST3K: It takes the true creative genius of hollywood - the fabled B movie - and massages it in a way that allows movie snobs, who would generally turn their nose up at the idea of possesed bulldosers attacking the general public, to enjoy them in their intended glory. What glory is that, you ask? These movies were MADE to be made fun of. They weren't made to be "good" in the classic hollywood sense. For example - go rent a movie called Sorrority Babes in the Slimeball Blow-a-rama. When you see that movie, you will understand what cinnematic zen really is.
No question: Batman And Robin
This is an INCREDIBLY bad movie. From the Estes rockets shooting from the motorcycles, to Barry Bostwick's crotch showing up in a jumpsuit, to Persis Khambatta thinking she could act after showing up in the first Star Trek movie. I couldn't even watch the whole thing for free on cable, back in the 80's when I'd watch anything with explosions. This movie makes the A-Team look good!
- Think of it as evolution in action -
Saw it on an airplane.
Bad science, cheezy plot, stupid twists. and I found the special effects relatively amusing....
LedgerSMB: Open source Accounting/ERP
I want those 2 hours of my life back. I will actually pay to not watch that movie.
I like to place meaningful quotes in my sig, so people will know that I know what meaningful quotes are.
at the beginning of this movie you see guns and ammo spewing out of the mouth of a flying stone head, preaching "guns good, penis bad". And it gets worse from there... Sean Connery, what were you thinking?? http://imdb.com/title/tt0070948/
NT
Wh47 d1d j00 541, 31337 15n't t3h r0xor5 ne m0r3???
Anything directed by Michael Bay pretty much sucks.
Yet Another Web Site
Pi was good. But I suffer from migraines, and this movie actually induced one whopper of a migraine for me. By the end, I was wishing I could drill a hole in my own head. It makes my list of good movies I've seen, but will never, ever see again.
Matango, The Fungus of Terror
Alternate titles include "Island of the Mushroom Men" and "Attack of the Mushroom People".
It takes the genius of the man who created Godzilla (Ishiro Honda) to come up with this classic tale, which answers the age-old question "What would you get if Gilligan's Island was remade as a Japanese horror monster movie?"
Five passengers set out on short pleasure trip (a three hour tour?), the weather started getting rough, the tiny yacht was lost - and they end up lost on a deserted island. Fortunately, their lack of food is solved by the abundance of wild mushrooms on the island.
Soon, the Professor and the TV star find an abandoned ship - missing all its mirrors! (ooh...) The ship was a research vessel for studying the effects of radiation on local flora (atomic weapons having been tested near by). The crew is missing. An hour of suspenseless terror follows, as strange creatures begin to "terrorize" our hapless castaways. Eventually, they discover the horrible secret - the Mushroom Men! These terrible creatures use their incredible ZombieSpeed(tm) to chase the castaways around the island in slow motion.
Eventually, the remaining castaways patch up one of the boats and begin to sail away. Everything looks safe, when one of them looks into a mirror and recoils in horror at the face of a... Mushroom Man! The island mushrooms they ate change anyone into a Mushroom Man! The Mushroom Men on the island were actually the missing crew from the research boat! The horror, the horror...
For an alternate (positive) review of this movie, go here.
Science Fiction
Fortress
In the near future, the religious right have staged a coup and rule America under an iron fist of theocratic tyranny. One of their many edicts is that every couple can only have one child (but fruitless and don't multiply). A couple (Christopher Lambert and Female Actress #27) are fleeing the repressive USA for that shining city on a hill, that beacon of democracy and freedom - Mexico! As they try to slip across the border, we learn they are fleeing because the woman is pregnant with their second child - their first having died some tragic death before the movie. They must escape the US, or the evil Christian bible thumper will force her... to have an abortion! (Huh?)
They are caught and Lambert is sent to a high-tech prison dubbed "the Fortress". It is a large hole in the ground, with a central core that contains an elevator and a number of deadly lasers! Each prisoner also must swallow a device that will explode should they leave their slice of the prison cylinder.
Typical scenes of prison life ensue, including a talk with the crusty old-timer who informs Lmabert that he has been there for 35 years - there is no escape! Of course, given the stated timeline, this means that the prisoner has been there since 1979 - which, as we all know, is when Jerry Falwell completed the first of his death-laser dungeons built beneath Liberty University.
It only gets worse from there, folks...
Chick Flick
When a Man Loves a Woman
Without a doubt, the worst movie ever foisted upon me by my wife (who also hated it, though not with the same gut-searing passion that I did). I was sorely tempted to leave this movie several times - only the free popcorn refills kept me seated. Damn that evilly-delicious fake butter!
Meg Ryan plays an alcoholic. Andy Garcia is her sympathetic husband. When her life finally spirals completely out of control, he finds her the help she needs, takes care of the kids, supports her in every aspect of her recovery. In return, she divorces him, gets custody of the kids (of course) and learns that everything is
I was originally offered a free ticket to see this as an advance promotion by Warners UK. About a week before the screening I was told it had been cancelled due to "unforseen circumstances". Ie they hadn't forseen that the movie was total crap.
Sadly, I did not take advantage of this opportunity to skip the movie, and went to see it with some others a little while later. It is the ONLY movie I have ever wanted to walk out halfway through.
Jolyon
Please read my Canon EOS tech blog at http://www.everyothershot.com
F 9/11 is eligible for Best Picture. Any full-length feature film is eligible. The film is clear as to what are facts and what are opinions or questions.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0298093/
It movie should not be destroyed on sight.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100468/
Red Surf is barely less worse... although this is good material if you want to destroy Clooney fans.
I won't say more, I don't want to remember more about those movies.
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former" - Albert Einstein.
Let me see if I got this straight. Some slashdotters don't read the article. Others don't read the story that links to the article. You didn't even read the headline?
Ask Slashdot: What's the Worst Movie You've Ever Seen?
It's not offtopic, dumbass. It's orthogonal.
I first thought of Forrest Gump, because I hate that movie about as much as I can hate a movie, but then I thought about the 1970's Spider-man movies. Unlike the recent ones, there was simply no redeeming factors, and I've never seen Spidey more butchered. Being a Spidey fan, it really vexed me.
I just resaw the movie "Naked Space" or "The Creature Wasn't Nice" this afternoon together with some friends and we all instantly agreed that it must be the worst movie we have ever seen. The monster features a disco dancing monster that looks most like a person wrapped in bacon. imdb info
Bad acting and I could only watch about 15 minutes of it before turning it off.
Is there anyone who did like it and why?
Absolutely shocked, that Battlefield Earth is not lower no the list.
Come on, 24th place?
Should be bottom 5, at least.
Everything about that movie is beyond the worst abyss of terrible any human creation has ever reached.
Probably was created by Hubbard's Space Aliens(TM).
Hmm.... In fact, I suspect the Scientologists try to drive the rating up, so perhaps it is artificially inflated.
Nothing in that movie was done right.
In fact, the degree to which it is bad makes it quite fun.
The camera is broken (or, at least, almost always at either a -30 or 30 degree angle). The lighting is totally fucked up. Unpleasant earth tones or greens.
Acting. Dispicable.
Script? Obnoxious, at the best of times. Big fat aliens tromping around speaking about how they are better than the 'man animals'.
Plot? Har Har. Stupid capitalism aliens are trying to rape the universe.
Ending? Even better. 'man animals', wearing loin clothes, no less, and running around in the wilderness, find old man-tech (F16s), and fly them around, still wearing their loinclothes.
These F16s, which proved useless the last time the aliens invaded, whoop ass this time---ostensibly because they are wearing loin clothes instead of flight suits.
Then, one nuclear bomb blows up the aliens homeworld, and the 'man animals' win.
Sweeeeeeeeeeet.
Totally Sweeeeeeeeeet.
In fact, I find it's 'badness' an alluring 'replusion'.
Must hate myself.
I think I nearly pissed myself laughing when I watched that movie.
WhiteWolf666 an exBush supporter. All you new-school,compassionate,save the children Republicans can rot in hell
I love science fiction, stuff about the future, and robots are awesome. But this movie SUCKED. Most of it was tolerable, but the last half hour nearly brought tears to my eyes. And not because I felt sorry for the little boy robot, but because it was incredibly cheesy and really really dumb.
Spielberg obviously put a lot of energy in making it look terrific, because it did. But all the great cinematography and cool special effects in the world could not save this flaming turd from stinking the place up.
Surprised I didn't see any other slashdotters mention this one.
With Richard Chamberlain... simply awful!
I've heard from several friends that if you have the opportunity to see Highlander 2 for free - don't... so I haven't.
I've also heard that Battlefield Earth is dreadful.
--==>>BobT>
Brooke Shields in her, er, prime. Makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about that movie.
If we find that in Iraq, I'll consider it a WMD.
You were mistaken. Which is odd, since memory shouldn't be a problem for you
'nuff said
They couldn't fix my brakes, so they made my horn louder.
Bad Boys 2
Pearl Harbor
Van Helsing
Tomb Raider
Anything with robin williams
anything else by Micheal Bay / jerry bruckheimer
and of course, the "great" "bad" movies:
"Street Trash"
"Beyond the Valley of the Dolls"
"Penitentiary III"
the last three are almost too awful to be believed. All will leave you completely incredulous in wake of their ever deepening awfulness/magnificence.
um no the 'fix is in' is really just a nice little satirical joke on the state of the political environment in the US - at least that's what i got out of it, don't take it too seriously now dude. Bush will be out come november. One Term President.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0114795/
It.. truly.. sucks...
-- http://z80.org - all opinions, all the time --
OK, I was going to post this anonymously, but I changed my mind. /me dons a flame-retardant suit.
Wh47 d1d j00 541, 31337 15n't t3h r0xor5 ne m0r3???
Wing Commander. Just awful.
Yeah. It has Emilio Estevez fighting a gang of possessed semi trucks. 'Nuff said. By far the worst movie ever.
Here's the scoop.
Here's a trailer (hopefully).
Should win acadamy awards for
- crappiest special effects
- most unrealistic and most predictable storyline
- worst acting
- biggest ignorance to history in history
The fight that Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise had was the way actual couples fight. Not screaming and hitting, but just little comments that to your heart. When Nicole Kidman takes a hit on the doobie, and starts admitting that the only reason she married Cruise was because he was the safe choice, its so *REAL* that it felt like an actual fight.
I've watched that movied 10 times, and the problem with it is the beginning is brilliant. Absolutely, freaking great. But its clear that around the point where he heads to the "ceremony" that's where he died and someone else takes over.
But up until that point, Man. I hated the movie the first time I watched it, but I kept watching it, and now I put it in my all-time greatest list of movies.
I can see, though, if you only watched it once, why you'd hate it.
I think I saw this one. Wasn't it about some comic book obsessed guy? I also remember something about swinging a baby around by it's umbellicle cord. What I remember the most is that these are 90 minutes of my life i will never get back. And I agree on the "can it get any worse thoughts". It did, all the time.
Rest in peace Malin "looxn" Kristiansen. We miss you...
The part that bugged me the most was the fact that a ballistic rocket took about 15 seconds to hit the sun from the planet's surface. Then, Captain James T. Kirk, the man who has "cheated death" a thousand times, dies by falling off of a cliff? That's the best the writers could come up with? My three year old daughter could have written a better script, and it would be more scientifically plausible.
Today's Sesame Street was brought to you by the number e.
I didn't laugh, nor did I enjoy it, therefore I found it to be a bad movie. What's so difficult about that?
worst movie ever,
I assure you I was on the Internet within minutes registering my disgust AROUND the world.
Disco Godfather has to be the worst movie I have ever seen. Those (un)fortunate enough to have seen it know what I'm talking about - 'Put your weight on it!".
Without a doubt.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0231775/
An absolutely horrible remake of the classic "Heaven can wait" An insult to the original film.
It's like someone took a good film. Then misinterpreted the essence of it, took it out, replaced it with crap. Anybody who replaces Warren Beaty with Chris Rock realy should get his head examined.
Absolutely hideous.
>>That stupid, stupid movie where the audience dress up and throw toast.
Rocky Horror Picture Show
>>Ok, it's fun to watch because of what is going on around you in the theater
That's the whole point. This was before MST3K.
==== Warning:this poster contains subject matter that may be offensive. Flaming discretion is advised.
Your opinion of me being a troll is stupid. Fair's fair, no?
Actually anything with Susan Surandon in it makes me want to run for the hills. I've never been more bored during a movie.
That reminds me, she was also starring in that butcher job of Dune that the SciFi channel did 2 years ago, coincidence? Well..maybe not the SciFi channel butchered it anyway, but having her in it certainly didn't help matters.
Question everything
I haven't seen many movies, but in my opinion Star Trek V was a very very very poor movie. I'm not at all glad I saw it. I've loved other star trek movies, but star trek V is just.... bad.
I wasn't even able to watch the whole thing.
LK
"Hi. This is my friend, Jack Shit, and you don't know him." - Lord Kano
just because it looks like nobody else has mentioned it, i nominate zardoz, which stars sean connery's chest hair in a red diaper and opens with a giant stone head saying "the gun is good. the penis is evil."
"The American President"
LK
"Hi. This is my friend, Jack Shit, and you don't know him." - Lord Kano
other "Gems" of his include:
Mortal Combat
Street Figheter
Resident Evil (seeing a trend?)
Soilder
And that shitfest that opened yesterday:
Alien Vs. Preditor
Hollow words will burn and hollow men will burn.
A.I. is the worst movie of all time, hands down.
It's like a mental kick in the nuts. Not only did I leave the movie disappointed, but I wanted the two hours of my life back... with interest.
There is no movie worse than AI.
Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared Sin http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085935/
One Down, Two to Go: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086051/
After the Fall of New York: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085125/ (I could only stomach about 10 minutes of this one!)
Then there is that simply AWFUL movie that had about 10 minutes of Bruce Lee footage that they pasted in to a movie they were making when he died! They had ACTUAL FOOTAGE from his FUNERAL in the movie! The rest of the scenes were Bruce Li, wearing sunglasses. He would look down, take them off, look up, and POOF! There was Bruce Lee! The funeral footage probably makes this the most TACKY movie of all times! I think it was the one where he fought Kareem Abdul Jabar, if I'm not mistaken.
The Musketeer (2001)
Dead Ringers (1988)
I'm sure there are worse movies, but I still want my money back for these two.
nt
Now that was the epitome of bad movie making. It seems the director wanted to deliver as much shock value as possible, and have it passed off as art. The stain lives on my memory to this day. Its one of those things for which I wish I could erase some memories.
Most major pictures never come close to worst movie ever. I've seen a lot of the "Bottom 100" and would easily throw a movie like Cool As Ice in the dvd player. Others like Battlefield Earth or House of the Dead, I wouldn't waste my time, while bad they're not the worst.
h tml
At least start with something as bad as Barn of the Blood Llama and get worse from there. http://www.badmovies.org/movies/bloodllama/index.
Yes, this review did make me what to see it too.
Okay. It's a William Gibson story starring Christopher Walken and Willem Dafoe so it must be good, right? WRONG! There's only about an hour of movie followed by about 2 hours of flashbacks (of stuff you saw in the first hour).
Chan is Missing
That would be have been Episode 821 - Time Chasers. A classic! Hardly the worst movie they ever featured though...
Highlander 2 retroactively ruined the original Highlander [1]. Mathematically it follows that H2 must therefore rate about a -8 on a scale of 1 to 10. Since the Highlander franchise was already in complete ruin by H3, that movie could not have scored negative, since that would violate the Law of Conservation of Movie Ratings.
Indeed, a normal film cannot rate below 1/10, but aggregate films (ones with sequels, prequels, spin-offs, etc.) can be treated as elements of a greater meta-film that carries its own meta-rating. That means that these films are in the priveleged position of being able to earn negative ratings, with the proviso that the meta-rating (a sum of the regular ratings) must remain positive. This is due to the parity rules in Copenhagen formulation of the Law of Conservation of Movie Ratings, the mathematics of which are too complex to get into here.
Negative ratings are very special, because they mean that the movie was so bad that it ruined a completely different movie, one which was otherwise a perfectly fine film. It takes a very special film to accomplish this. Most bad sequels are merely bad, but they do not spoil one's enjoyment of the earlier films. Thus they merely earn low, but positive, ratings, and do not cause the earlier films to mysteriously become bad through association. However, if the original film, once highly thought of, is no longer enjoyable after a sequel, only then does the possibility of an actual negative movie rating become conceivable.
There are very few films that meet this criteria, and Highlander 2 is the finest example of this select group. Therefore the original poster is correct [2]. Highlander II is the Worst Movie of All Time. QED.
----
Footnotes:
Without a doubt it's very little known movie called "Psyched by the 4D Witch". Something Weird Video released it on a double feature set with "Monster a Go Go" which positively sparkles by comparison. "4D Witch" has absolutely nothing going for it. It's so bad that a roomful of geeks watching the naked woman performing sexual witchcraft waving candles around were more concerned that she'd somehow set her bad wig on fire than with her naked breasts. This movie is so bad that, when I showed it at a bad movie party at my house, halfway through people were asking if we could watch something good, like "Plan 9" when it was over. Nobody involved with this movie was ever heard from again, and it's a good thing.
My two rock-bottom flicks are The Wizard of Mars (so bad it's very hard to find, apparently) and the ever-unpopular Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.
When the hell did Slashdot become Fark?
I should have a vote in this.
/Ex
MST3k:
Girl in gold boots: Randomly in the middle of the movie, they go to a beach (near my house!) and ride a 6 wheeled "buggy"... then back to the movie. why is it in there? who knows.
Wild wild world of batwoman: *shudder* a super group of females, with such fine plot twists as an atomic powered hearing aid, a potion that makes people dance, and... pain. Lots of pain. for the viewers, not the people in the movie.
Gamera: "Gamera is fun to meet, he is made of turtle meat, we believe in gamera!!! (Did you know he is friend to all children?" Big flying turtle. Takes out Kyoto or Tokyo or something.
Sidehackers: Something about riding a motorcycle with a sidecar, trying to popularize it as a sport. I don't think I ever finished it sober--man is it bad.
Manos: Quite probably the worst movie ever made. I love it. There's an interview out there somewhere with the guy who plays torgo (I thought). can't find it, but well worth reading. FYI, two or three people committed suicide within a couple years after the movie was finished-- and the guy who wrote it went back to being a fertilizer sales person, IIRC.
Red Zone Cuba: Just bad. I can't finish it. even when drunk.
Touch of Satan: "It looks like everyone is burning grandmas today"
GOOD MST3k
Pod people: "Trumpy, you can do stupid things"
War of the Colossal beast-- A must watch (just for the short Mr. B. Natural)
Space Mutiny: I don't know many MST3k fans who won't put space mutiny in their top 3 favorites.
Beginning of the end: "I'm peter graves"... and crickets on post cards. a truly excruciating episode. well worth watching
Most of those are available on DVD. I highly recommend anything in season 8 for new people to MST3k. Some are available online. You can check out the DAP for more info.
as for non-mst3k bad movies... let look through my dvd collection first.
Death Race 2000: Sylvester Stallone and a bunch of other people race across the country in horribly dumb looking vehicles, trying to kill as many people as possible.
Bubba Ho Tep: I enjoy this movie immensely, but everyone else says it sucks. listen to the commentary, and it'll be a lot better (but watch it once first).
Gigli: *shudder* I want the 600 megs of download back.
Gor: *shudder*. MST3k did an ep called Outlaw or something like that, which is the sequal to this. somehow a friend of mine got the original... *shudder* it burned.
escape from NY: it's bad, but in a good way!
Escape from LA: It's bad, but in a bad way!
Cruel intentions 2: If I had to pick a worst movie ever, it's probably this. (note, I don't own this, I turned on the tv one night, and turned my back on it, and realized that this was on about 3/4 of the way through it.
So to sum it up:
worst MST3k: Girl in the gold boots.
worst non-mst3k: Cruel intentions 2
(this is just a small sampling, I've seen 80 of the IMDB worst, and almost every single MST3k... some of them are bad, I just don't remember them as it's been a couple years since I collected 'em all)
I didn't like Moulin Rouge either, but I will say it had the best versions of Like a Virgin and Smells Like Teen Spirit I had heard.
Some of the worst movies I've seen:
Quills
Dancer in the Dark
It seems like it's common to say, "Dancing Lemons From Outer Space (made up title) was the worst movie of all time". I generally don't watch movies like that, for example I've never seen any of Ed Wood's movies. Movies like those aren't trying to be good, so they can't be the worst. The ones I listed above are trying to be good movies, and they fail miserably, therefore they are terrible, although maybe not the worst. I'm sure there are worse ones out there.
You had me at "dicks fuck assholes".
It's so bad it's brilliant! Despite that high score on the IMDB, you should give it a try. You will not^Wregret.
I really looked forward to it, but the tracker seems to be down.. (connection refused). Anyone else having more luck?
"It's too bad that stupidity isn't painful." - Anton LaVey
Strange...
:-)
You're complaining about a movie about a troll.
As a result you get modded as a troll.
Shouldn't you therefore like Shrek?
Frankenhooker! Yes, it's what you think. Some guy rebuilds his girlfriend (killed in a tragic lawnmover accident) out of hooker parts. Hilarity ensues.
A Polish Vampire In Burbank! When the two main characters are "Sphincter" and "Queerwolf" you know it's gonna be a rough two hours....
Maybe he hasn't seen Dungeons and Dragons? And maybe you've forgotten the title of this Ask Slashdot.
"Hot lesbian witches! It's fucking genius!"
I had to fast forward through the entire damn thing just to get to the one good part where they were about to get offed at the end. Everyone involved with that movie should be put in the witch's oven.
Future War.
The most painful movie to watch in the world.
Here is what IMDB has to say.
Sorry, teleporters just kill you and then make a copy. A perfect, soul-less copy.
If a movie is so bad that you remember seeing it doesn't that change things? By impressing you with some entertainment value, however backwards and unintended, it gave the inspiration to you to try and impress others with your brilliant description of how awful it was, right?
Personally, my answer to What would you consider the worst movie ever made? would have to be answered with a question, that can probably be answered by someone who cares more than I;
What movie lost the most money for its investors?
This issue is a bit more complicated than you think.
Absolutely, positively "The Apple".
We're talking about what you hate personally. It's what you hate that we all hate equally.
... I hardly see how they can even be included.
I think the consensus here is definitely on:
Battlefield Earth
Most of the movies in the IMDB Bottom 100 are bad movies - on purpose. Some of those movies in the list are B Movies and some never saw nationwide release
A very obvious omission - one that I didn't see by scrolling through all of this quickly and that i couldn't spot on the bottom 100 is:
Heman: Masters Of The Universe (Live Action)
Yell & scream & rant & rave... it's no use... you need a shaaaave ~ Bugs Bunny
Galaxina has to be the funniest worst movie ever.
It used to come on late nights on HBO, and my brothers and I always made a point to watch it. Sometimes it's hard not to love a good bad movie.
(Score: -1, Stupid)
I could have watched my dog's butt for an hour and a half and it would have been more scary. And free.
I'd like to nominate Kill Bill as the worst Recent Movie That Was Supposed To Be Good. Sure, Tarantino did an expert job of capturing the essense of the source material he was paying homage to, but when you distill bad movies, you end up with... a bad movie. At least the originals came by their weaknesses honestly and could be forgiven them, but Tarantino added a layer of pretentiousness to it that killed it for me.
Ah! Very true. In a similar way to how the latter Matrix films destroyed the excellent first one but not to the same extent. Of course, Matrix Revolutions destroyed an excellent first movie, and an average second movie. If Matrix scored 8/10, and Reloaded 5/10, then Revolutions scored around -13, which beats -8 for Highlander II.
http://movies.yahoo.com/shop?d=hv&id=1802835139
Nightfall is the best short story in SciFi history. It is seminal Asimov.
The movie of the same name is the worst movie in history.
Of course, its a Roger Corman flick.
The movie had nothing to do with the story, the plot, or the greatness of Asimov's work it was supposedly taken from. Only the title was pilfered from the story by Asimov, in a poor effort to get people to see it.
Rotten to the core!
Asimov should have sued their butts!
Regards,
Roger Born
writing.borngraphics.com
Sorry. No refunds.
Angelo My Love is my personal benchmark for bad movies. Imagine a documentary with no narrator, a documentary where nobody speaks any language you understand, a documentary with no subtitles, a documentary about people you don't care about in any way by the end. I don't know what Robert Duvall could have been thinking about when he made it. Did he spend a year in a drug induced coma around 1982-1983?
My wife took me to see this based on the opinion of a particular reviewer. The only good thing that came out of it was that by the end I knew that I had found the perfect movie reviewer, one who's opinion was so completely opposite to mine that I knew from then on to avoid movies he liked and to go to movies he hated. Unfortunately, for both of us, he died a few years later or else I'm sure I would still be using him to check out which movies to watch or avoid.
This movie has become a continuing family joke. Any time I take my wife to see something she hates, it subtracts from the bad movie balance sheet between us, and we laugh about how it still doesn't make up for Angelo My Love. I still have a lot of bad movies to go through before we are even.
I think they spent their entire $10 budget on the special effect. Not effects. Effect. I watched 10 minutes, then watched the rest at high speed, just in case there was something interesting in it. There wasn't.
I got the movie poster from a friend of mine, which features a terminatoresque skeletoid robot standing over a burning motorcycle. This scene never appeared in the movie. All in all, the worst movie I've ever seen.
How's my programming? Call 1-800-DEV-NULL
How thrilling to watch some other family argue. I can do that in my own home just fine, thank you.
Lasers Controlled Games!
The magnificent works of Ed Wood, where are they? Even his masterpiece is missing!
The moon is not fully subjugated. I demand a second assault wave preceded by a massive nuclear bombardment.
"Thor the Conqueror" [1983] is THE worst film I ever saw. And I've seen a lot. It's a "spaghetti Conan", and halfway through, I still had no idea what it was all about. If you rent or buy: Half way through is when you wonder whether to turn the shit off, weep or just go crazy and laugh your ass off. Smoking something and watching with friends might help. You may also want to instruct a friend to say "hold... it might still pick up..give it a chance" every 5th minute. (So others don't shoot the VHS player.)
"Thor the Conqueror" makes it painfully obvious that "Plan 9 from outher space"'s position as Golden Turkey #1 is utterly undeserved. "Plan 9" shines like an ingenious and organized masterpiece in comparision to THE all time worst movie ever: The one and only.... "Thor the Conqueror"!
You have been warned.
Hands down: Magnolia.
Lots of big names in the cast, but the movie was utterly horrible. Boring dialog delivered by loathsome characters in situations that I simply couldn't be made to care about.
And then it started raining frogs. I want my two hours back.
Why yes, I AM a rocket scientist!
Far and away the worst movie I have ever had the misfortune of seeing... The Wrecking Crew. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0196219/
I gave it 30 minutes. After that I was so sick of it that I walked out of the theater knowing that it was pouring cats & dogs outside and I was soaked through by the time I got home.
the hand's down worst movie is 'Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood ' -- http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0116126/
'Let's go get 'em' - and other cliche's made this an awful movie. In the process it confirmed Afflek to be cute (by womens standards), but oh! bad.
DudeBaron
R.O.T.O.R.: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098156/
I kid you not. The dialog (well, a "script", if you will), the acting, the sets, OMG, it's just awful. Horrible.
I make bets for $ with my co-workers to actually sit through this thing (I got a used VHS of it from a video store in GA) and NOT tell me that it's the worst thing they've ever seen. That's a very subjective thing, yet I've always won.
It has "a special effect," for chrissake, and the visual on the front cover doesn't even show up in the movie. OMG, it's just awful, I'm gonna go sit in the corner and rock myself for a while now...
"Professional coder on closed source. Do not attempt."
People either love or hate Moulin Rouge. It's either they're type of movie or not. Personally, I loved it. I even own the DVD.
I think the movie is original, creative, and dazzling. The costumes and setting, not to mention visuals, are amazing.
To each their own.
Worst movie I've seen? Easy: Mulholland Drive. David Lynch must have been falling over himself laughing that he was able to get critics to love his movie. Like the idiot philosopher who states "God is one hand clapping" which gets blank stares and nodding heads as if to say "wow, he's so deep". Nonsense. And so is Mulholland Drive - nonsense.
Ruby on Rails Screencast
1. A.I.
Worst movie of all time if you ask me.
Tin Pan saucers, Ed Wood, a major actor dies during production and an OS ...
I'm a consultant - I convert gibberish into cash-flow.
Maybe not quite the worst movie of all time, but in the top five.
Fact: I couldn't sit through it, bailed on the last 10 minutes.
Now let me put that fact in context: I was able to sit through 'Glitter' in its entirety.
As for the all time worst, the IMDB list jumbles around frequently, but Manos is the only consistent top-3 contender and should be considered the universal Worst Movie of All Time.
---
WARNING:Slashdot karma not redeemable in the afterlife.
Super Mario Bros. The Movie. Enough said.
More come to mind...
9 1/2 Ninjas - Imagine a chick-flick mixed with kung-fu movie trying hard to be funny. Then add an ANNOYING actress who cannot act her way out of a wet paper bag.
The Secret Sex Lives of Romeo and Juliet - A racy version of Romeo and Juliet with "Laugh-In" style jokes interjected at odd points, with obviously cut-in sex scenes that do not resemble the people on film. Worst porn movie EVER.
Barbara the Barbarian - I showed this to a group and half of them fell asleep.
Sextette - Mae West in her seventies trying to play a sexy lead acress. This will make your skin crawl.
And the one I want to see:
The Day the Clown Cried - The lost classic of badfilm. The lowest in bad taste. Imagine a movie about a clown who is forced to lead children into the gas chamber at Auchwitz. Have all of the "Jewish children" played by Swedish kids. Have glaring problems with set and art direction. Then have it directed by and starring Jerry Lewis. OH - MY - GOD!
"Trademarks are the heraldry of the new feudalism."
Because scratching your chin does NOT mean you are acting, Travolta!
... followed by Mission To Mars, Gone in Sixty Seconds, Equilibrium, Dog Soldiers, Armageddon, Water World, Star Wars Episode 1, Matrix Revolutions.
There's a few, although none of them "beat" MK with its non-existant plot and acting. It's even based on a lot of special effects and they fail miserably even there.
Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
Either it was a really bad movie, or I just so didn't get it.
But it hurt big time to push thru to the end.
"Manos" is the most putrid movie I've ever seen, but "Armageddon" is by far the worst movie I've ever paid to see. I still regret the two hours I wasted in the theater watching it.
http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0274518/combined
The worst kind of movie is a failed comedy, and this is like something a bunch of stupid teenage kids would come up with if they had access to a junior high school video production lab. It's so unfunny it's physically painful.
Honorary Member of Jackie Chan's Kung Fu Process Servers
Manos; Hands of Fate is definitely worthy of being at the bottom of this barrel. Check out the MST3k edition if you can. Hilarious.
Battlefield Earth was spectacularly bad to the point of actually being quite funny. Stealing (almost verbatim in some cases) scenes from other movies wholesale (Bladerunner comes to mind), unbearably loud, rousing musical score and acting that is second to all.
But I'd definitely have to say Manos is worse. That haunting Torgo theme!!
My
Limekiller
Saw it in '69 or so, and it's still our benchmark for bad. Nothing else has ever come close.
Eraserhead.
;-)
My wife and I always use that as the movie that we compare all others to. So far, we haven't found one that's worse. But that could be because we get tipped off about the others. I haven't seen any on that bottom-100 list for that reason.
It's also possible that nobody here ever saw that one. I've noticed that almost all the movies mentioned here date from the past 25 years or so. There are plenty of really bad movies from before 1960. And most of them are still available, if you look hard enough.
(So much for the idea that copyright is robbing us of our culture.
Those who do study history are doomed to stand helplessly by while everyone else repeats it.
Look here and the ones marked with a skull are really really really bad!
Remember, Slashdot does not have a -1 disagree moderation, and no, troll, flamebait, and overrated are not substitutes.
Slurping the blood of corpses wrapped in cotton candy through enormous curly straws, on a spaceship populated by fanged circus clowns. Yep.
I walked out of this film.
k.
k.h.
It's "The Monkees", not "The Munkees".
Frankly, I don't think "Head" is a bad movie, but it is certainly a product of its time. Sort of like watching "Wild in the Streets" today.
-David
* As is generally the case, my opinions do not reflect those of my employer.
Worst... horror movie... ever. I knew it was going to be terrible. I mean, read the title. But my friend insisted on renting it. Oh my god... First of all, there were essentially no zombies in the movie. Or rather, there were a few, but pretty much all they did was crawl out of ditches and stand in the highway while vampires driving cars ran them down. Looking back, I'm still not sure which of the main characters were human and which were vampires. The plot at no point made any amount of sense, with characters being introduced for seemingly no reason, hanging around for 5 minutes never to be seen afterward.
On the plus side, there was a vampire-lesbian-sex scene. Even that made no sense though, it just kind of happened.
At the end (warning: spoiler alert ;) ), the zombies finally show up and eat everybody. No explaination, no buildup, they're just all of a sudden there.
The movie was thoroughly terrible in every way. If I ever meet the director, I'm going to punch him in the mouth for wasting 80 minutes of my life.
Garfield The Movie gets my vote for the worst movie of the year, and probably the worst I've ever seen. There is nothing in the movie that couldn't have been done in thirty a second commercial. Bill Murray must be in for a raspberry for his singing alone.
The only film on the imdb top 100 I have seen is Highlander II, and that is the second worst movie I have seen (Highlander being one of my all-time favourites).
The big tip I have been given, if the trial tells the whole story, then the film is BAD.
Conventional wisdom dictates that Plan 9 From Outer Space was the worst movie of all time, with honorary mention going to Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes. However, I can unequivocally state that each of these movies was akin to the works of Robert Frost compared to the Vogon poetry that was:
1) Laserblast
2) Even Dwarves Started Small
I saw both of these movies in a single week while in college. Each made me physically ill. Afterward, I suffered a six month aversion to movie theaters.
Surprisingly, I believe both have been preserved forever as DVDs. Is there no putrid tripe that isn't worthy of being made into a DVD?
>> My ultraviolent Linux switch video.
This one is pretty damn bad!
Best Buy can have you arrested
Shrek is an OGRE, not a troll.
^_^
Also, Moulin Rouge is one of the few movies where Ewan McGregor's amazing singing voice comes out. Man, can he sing!
I am so disappointed in you people that this has not been mentioned yet. All you need to know is Howard (the Duck) actually uses his little ducky prophylactic to do Leah Thompson. Unfrcikinbelievable.
-Lucas
"Office Space" is now classified as a documentary.
Because the actors should've stayed in the porn industry.
Doolittle :
Bomb no.20 : To explode of course.
It might not be the worst, but it's the worst I've seen in a long time, left me grieving for the90 minutes of my life I won't get back, a police officer pretending to be disabled kills his wife and his brother who happens to be sleeping with his wife.
Watching paint dry would be more interesting than the first 1/2 before he kills his wife and his brother as there is virtually no hint of a plot, then when it does happen oh shock horror the film gets even worse and your left with a increadably dull murder mistery with one cop trying to prove he's guilty and everyone else against him (hence the title of the film), he fails and by god that's a wet ending for a wet film.
Only good part about this film is the suspence of waiting for a good plot to come along, it doesn't, some people give this film some credit because of Christopher Reeve's condition being very similar t o that faked by the policeman in it, but I think it's better to tell it straight regardless, one truely bad film.
I didn't read the book, so I don't know if the original story was the problem or whether it got the Hollywood treatment, but it sucked.
>> "What would the robut do? Frame someone!"
Sigh.. I think I'm going bananas.. It's the same torrent, but the tracker refuses connections from time to time..
"It's too bad that stupidity isn't painful." - Anton LaVey
I really don't see how you could possibly fuck up a movie like this, but somehow, Hollywood found a man to do it.
in which a movie is so bad that it actually becomes enjoyable?
I've seen not a few movies that were so seriously flawed in plot and connection between scenes that it actually became really fun to watch.
The best example I can think of is "Starship Troopers". Haven't read the book, but the movie is so full of plot holes and stupid scenes. It was so stupid it actually made me laugh for hours, making it really fun for me to watch. It was full of fanservice and stupid scenes showing aliens kicking the life out of the stupid humans. It showed all the stereotypes of the genre, making it an excellent parody imho.
Sure, some movies are simply bad and boring or simply not bad enough to be able to enjoy as a parody, but many movies are simply dumb yet enjoyable, like various kungfu movies.
Feel free to comment about such movies you've encountered.
^_^
Pre-hollywood John Woo is pure genius. If he didn't create the endless clip of bullets, at least he's the guy that made it absurdly obvious. (Dirty Harry's "Make my day" line wouldn't work in a John Woo movie).
His gunfight scenes are always amazing. If you think The Killer was over the top, you should see Hardboiled. Truly amazing movie.
It's not offtopic, dumbass. It's orthogonal.
In between reposts of The Register stories.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080380/
"Alphie and Bibi, two sweet, naive youths from Moose Jaw, Canada, have come to America to compete in the 1994 Worldvision Song Festival. Although the pair have talent, they are beaten out by the underhanded tactics of the festival favorites, another duo with the backing of BIM: Boogalow International Music, and its leader, Mr. Boogalow. Though crestfallen by their loss, Bibi and Alphie are soon delighted to hear the Mr. Boogalow has taken an interest in their music and wants to sign them to his label. All is looking up for the two until they begin to discover the dark underside of the rock and roll world."
It's like a weird cross between "Can't Stop the Music" and a Sid & Marty Krofft production from the mid-70s. Bad writing, plot, acting, effects, sets, costumes...and yet, you just have to look at it, like a car wreck. From mind control jewels to futuristic togas, this movie is classically bad. If the name "Menahem Golan" has any significance to you, you must see this awful movie.
or anything by that director.
or mabye not. My roommate e keeps bringing home these cheesy romances from the regina public library. A basic corny plot, [no sex? it's a romance, and half the movie hinges on sex. if it's going to be that bad of a movie at least show some skin fergodsakes], stupid jokes, and overall boring, uninteresting, and a waste of time. But even that movie is great compared to the cheesy trying-to-be-american chinese movies which may or may not be funded by their government. I'm sure there's plenty of talent in china, i mean their population is like 50x Canada's...
what gives with these crappy movies?
GENERATION 26: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation.
No, the point is this:
There is a difference between posting an unpopular opinion and posting flamebait.
If he actually held this opinion, it would be okay.
However, it is highly unlikely that he or anyone else would find Shrek so horrible that he can't find anything worthwhile in it, and considers it a worse movie than say Ice Pirates, or Dreamcatcher or any of the other hundreds named here.
So, while it may be your opinion that his opinion is an honest one, some of us think that he wasn't sharing his opinion at all, but merely acting as a troll and posting flamebait. Last I checked it was okay to mod that down.
The only movie I have EVER fell asleep in.
greg, REMEMBER ED CURRY!!!
The only explanation I could come up with for Signs was that the aliens were not invading. They were actually just dropping off their retarded. Once you realize the aliens are mentally handicapped it all makes sense.
My Blog
It was supposed to be a spoof of badly made Kung Fu movies. The Steve Oedekerk and the producers bought the rights to some old, crappy movie, and proceded to re-cut it, and add Steve into the scenes.
Well, I thought it was crap. It might have made more sense as a parody if I had seen the original movie. But since I had no idea what the original plot was, I had no idea what exactly they were trying to make fun of.
And it didn't help that they just beat to death all the same jokes again and again.
So I think Kung Pow is an example of the worst kind of movie. A movie which is bad because it fails to be bad enough!
Without a doubt, the worst movie that I have ever seen was Biker Boyz. The plot made no sense and seemed to have no continuity. Not to mention, the race at the end where Larry Fishburne and the other guy drag race on a dirt road. You've got to be an idiot to drag race a bike on a dirt road!
So, uh, yeah. Biker Boyz. (Although, I do have to admit that it was better the second time around while completely loaded up on Jack Daniels and watching it with several similarly drunk friends.)
If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will.
I nominate Titanic as the worst movie ever. That was just one giant suckfest. The only reason to watch that was so you could see Leonardo die at the end.
Read my short stories - You won't regret it.
But if I were to vote all time bad - My vote goes to "ROBOT JOX"
for me, will always be "hell comes to frogtown" starring rowdy roddy piper as the last man on earth.
(not trolling, i just hated the monotonous music)
-g
"Bad Taste". Peter Jackson.
Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad.
C.H.U.D. II: Bud the CHUD
Oh. God.
I laughed, I cried, I stabbed myself in the eye.
i agree. A retard gives 4 guys magical powers to battle aliens.. stevie king is sucking as s lately
Can't believe no one else reported this.. It did have one cool dream/recall sequence.
The movie was pretty revolting and mostly bad. But I did quite like the ending.
-a
Nightfall is probably on of the worst movies I have seen. I was expecting something loosley based on Asimov to be better, but no. The dubbed over english just puts it over the top.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0249840/
The movie is called Sing and I am ashamed to say I was part of it. It was only a stupid three second shot of me, but it seemed like a frozen eternity when my girlfriend and I went to see the movie at the cinema. Man it was awful. So bad, we crept out of theatre half way through the movie, sheilding my face all the way.
SEO Copywriter. Just Say ON
I was disappointed by Shrek too, but I can't say I 'hated' it. I thought the humans walked very stiffly (like puppets, they didn't seem to have any weight), and I remember reading that the animators deliberately tried to make them 'less realistic' - probably something to do with the Uncanny Valley phenomenon. I don't think they succeeded. The sequel looked a lot less forced.
The movie was like watching bad home movies. By the time anything interesting happened, the movie ended! I turned to my friends afterward, and said "I can't believe I paid money to see this!"
There was nothing scary about this movie. I suppose the fact that it got national attention on such a small production budget earns it some kudos, but it was an awful movie.
I'd really love to see a listing where the budgets of these movies are factored in, for bost best and worst. I think that would yield some interesting results.
http://movies.yahoo.com/shop?d=hv&cf=info&id=18001 37759
This movie sucked rocks.
GJC
Gregory Casamento
## Chief Maintainer for GNUstep
You will not believe how bad The Creeping Terror is until you watch it yourself.
I cannot describe its badness (not that that's going to stop me from trying...)
It makes the special effects in The Blob look stunning by comparison. It makes
the acting in The Crawling Hand look like Academy Award material. It makes the
character development in War of the Worlds look deep and meaningful. It makes
the plotline of Spy Kids 2 seem almost plausible. It makes the camera work in
Return of the Killer Tomatoes look impeccably professional. It is by far and
away the most amazingly bad movie ever made. From the concept to the
implementation, from the writing to the scenery, from the acting to the
directing, it had *better* be the most impressively pathetic movie, because
if there is a worse one, I think I will wet my pants when I find out about it.
In a nutshell, The Creeping Terror is about these alien things that come out
of this landed spaceship. They look remarkably like people under a blanket
crawling around, only much slower. Occasionally you can see shoes under the
edges. Whenever these creeping things encounter anyone, the encountered party
screams and freezes, because if they ran (or walked, or indeed crawled) away,
the movie wouldn't have a plot. So they freeze, and scream, and wait for
the terrible creeping blanket to come right up to them, at which point they
have to crawl up into the thing to be eaten. This happens a whole bunch of
times, while scientists and police and whatnot poke around the spaceship in
a completely vain attempt to figure out what's going on. Eventually they
find the first one (which got out of the spaceship when it landed) and figure
out how to disable it, and then they inadvertently unleash the second one
(which was up to then restrained in the ship), and go through the whole big
thing *again*, and then when they disable the second one, the lead scientist
realizes that it sent a signal back to the ship -- so they go back to the
ship and try to shut it down before it transmits, but they fail, so it
transmits (something) into space, causing the lead scientist to conclude
that someday more of these things will come, and we'd better be ready, and
then, mercifully, the movie ends.
And if you think that sounds long and boring and lame, that's the executive
summary. Remember how I said the movie is so bad, I cannot describe its
badness? Yeah, I meant that. I've barely scratched the surface. Don't
believe me? You must watch the movie. It will exceed all your expectations
of badness and leave you stunned, in denial that any movie could be so bad.
Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.
The engaging characters of Plan 9 From Outer Space along with the sense of wasted potential you got from Star Trek V, The Banal Frontier.
And on Fark, Drew will delete your posts if he doesn't agree with your opinion.
So what?
I agree - the first two Star Wars movies have sucked.. then again, I wasn't too much into the second one in the first trilogy either.. I think ROTJ and ANH are the best of them, and the other 3 suck. I do have hope for episodes 7-9 though.
"Champagne for my real friends - and real pain for my sham friends!" http://ericblade.postalboard.com/
Reign In Darkness.
and
Frost
I couldn/t finish watching either of them.
Oh, same with Brazil.
Propaganda designed to weaken the thought provoking 1984. I wish someone would produce an acurate 1984 movie.
The government which is strong enough to protect you from everything is strong enough to take everything from you.
You're crazy! It's got Bill Maher.
Bloody horrible movie my father got for us when I was young. http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0084459/
The absolute worst movie I've ever seen was, by far, Horror Planet, aka Inseminoid. I say this while pointing out that I've seen both Iron Eagle II and Highlander II on the big screen.
Hey, a friend and I wanted to watch a good Science Fiction movie, and we had access to all the free movies we could watch through the local video store, because our friend managed it. It was just plain bad. Even though aliens were being born from the stomachs of several characters, the real enemy of the movie seemed to be rocks. While looking among the rocks, one of the characters falls on a rock, resulting in depressurization of his spacesuit and death. While this might sound like a cool effect, it really wasn't. Nothing about this movie was cool at all.
Oh yeah. Sheena is on cable right now, and I'm too lazy to get up and change the channel, so you know Horror Planet had to be bad for me to hate it that much. Sheena is a masterpiece by comparison.
Visit Lockjaw's Lair. He won't bite.
Its like Waking Life, but without the interesting animation. Pure, unadulterated, mental masturbation.
Worst Movie Ever!
IMDB Link
170 minutes of my life I'll never get back. A confusing pointless parade of cameos of stars which you hopelessly grapple for in hopes that they will be the sign of the start of a story line worth caring about.
Awesome furniture, accessories and cabinetry in Santa Rosa, CA: http://humanity-home.com/
Yes, but it took so long. When I saw it, I was thinking of the scene in Spartacus where Spartacus is crucified and his wife is saying "...please DIE!"
Have you seen "Plan Nine From Outer Space"? If not, see it and see if you still think Eraserhead is worst. (Allocate several days to P9FOS and it is actually enjoyable, but it's to bad to watch all at once)
Little Brother, watching the watchers
I've watched every movie done on MST3K, and they all bow down in terror to Orgy of the Dead.
You must be new. Welcome to slashdot. The land where groupthink is modded +5 insightful, anything remotely disagreeing with anything is -1 troll.
At least this guy was honest enough to admit that is the criteria for modding something a troll.
Mathematics is made of 50 percent formulas, 50 percent proofs, and 50 percent imagination.
Alien is #1 by a long shot Alien3 is #2, followed closely by Aliens (Yay, destruction) AVP follows, even though I haven't seen it And Trailing Badly.... Alien Resurrection
I like to place meaningful quotes in my sig, so people will know that I know what meaningful quotes are.
Overall I think Equilibrium shades it; AI was just horrible because it had traces of such amazing potential but ended in disgusting vomit... but Equilibrium has literally no saving graces whatsoever. Terrible script, terrible acting, terrible plot, practically non-existent action/fx, and what little there was - terrible. Not even so-bad-its-funny, me and my mates, who usually gyp loudly and crudely at bad tv|film|music|etc, sat through in stunned silence. Its that terrible.
Never had a girlfriend, have you?
Dune. 1980? w/ Lyle Mclaughlin
every line is whispered...
Wing Commander. actually any movie with Freddie Prinz Jr. is crap.
Bourne Supremacy. the constantly jiggling camera makes me want to steal this movie, steady all the images and resell it to make a mint, as the rest was good, but hell you couldn't "SEE" anything. Directors like this should be shot on sight.
Matrix Revolutions. Its like, the studsio heads said, yeah drop all this good braintease stuff, and just make friends at the end, even if it destroys all the continuity. Flying robots were too stupid to float solar panels above the clouds!
They Live, We Sleep
The only saving grace for this movie was the ping pong ball scene.
Setting his threshold to 5, Sparky eliminated most of the trolls on /.
Pick a movie, ANY movie, they're all bad.
But Maaa! Everyone else has a
as a former film school student and a geek of many years, i've always maintained that "polish vampire in burbank" (directed by Mark Pirro, the same fine fellow who brought us "curse of the queerwolf," which is, while a dreadful film, not bad enough to comment upon further) and in fact formulated my own rating system whereupon films receive a score between 1 and 1000 PViBs (Polish Vampire in Burbank's, in case your attention span is wavering). But a film festival i worked on in 2002 screened "The Double-D Avenger" and while i feel compelled to rate it at approximately 1.5 PViBs i know, deep down in my squishy little heart, that it is really just as bad. Double-D stars some of those fine, worthy Russ Meyer girls such as Raven de la Croix (who is a very nice lady in person but perhaps not the finest *cough* thespian the 20th century produced) and both movies are worth a look if you have a dirty mind and very low standards.
There are some movies that aren't in IMDB. "Outta Control" is one such example. A terrorist flick taking place entirely in Massachusetts (Saugus, Revere, and East Boston specifically) its biggest moment was the destruction of a Fotomat booth...
For my first post-divorce birthday, my friends took me to a "double feature" of "Shoot or Be Shot" (2002) starring William Shatner and "Kung Pow: Enter the Fist" (2002).
Three of the eight people in the theatre walked out muttering "This is the worst movie ever made". I can't believe anybody, anywhere, liked that movie. Kung Pow was just barely bad enough to get us to avoid nightmares after seeing "Shoot or Be Shot"
Plan 9 from Outer Space (1959). You know it gonna go downhill when the actor playing the prime enemy is replaced half way through filming by somebody who looks nothing like him. So you everytime they have the "new guy" on camera, he covers his face and you can see it switching back and forth constantly. Comical in a way but oh what a bad movie.
1) Fat Guy Goes Nutzoid One of my teachers in high school told us about the contest he had in college about finding the worst movie ever made, and this one won out for him. It's amazingly horrible, so I was in agreement with him for a while, until I saw:
2) The Terror of Tiny Town. It's your typical run-of-the-mill Spaghetti Western, but with a twist: the cast is entirely midgets. The set is full sized, and the acting is so bad, it's comical.
3) The Stuff My friend in said class above disagreed with our teacher's opinion on the worst movie ever made, and he handed me this on DVD. I started believing him for a while, but the other two are worse. However, a bad 80's B Horror movie is still a bad movie, and this is a good example of one.
So there you have it: my three submissions for the worst movie ever made.
No TiVo and no caffeine make me something something...
why would you respond to a suggestion that 13% is statistically relevant in this case.
Because it was statistically relevant that the number was skewed, and I felt it needed to be pointed out. If you have a problem with that, you're an idiot.
If you're gonna be rude and obnoxious, don't hide behind anonymity, you moron. Have to balls to attack someone using your own identity, or perhaps you knew you were trolling and didn't want to get modded down... in which case, the coward part is perfecly appropriate.
And yes, a banana tree could not do a worse job than Bush, mainly because a banana tree is incapable of making decisions, and will therefore not make any wrong ones.
99% of Bush's decisions so far have been the wrong ones. The 1% includes his decision to condemn the very thing that got him his Yale diploma, legacy admissions.
-- This sig for rent.
"If you're going to skip one film this year - make it "Gigli.""
-- Tony Toscano, TALKING PICTURES (U.S.)
From here.
Your signatures belong to me.
Farenheit 911 and Starship Troopers2 are tied for me as the worst ever. Beyond boring, to the point I was ready to do almost anything to distract myself from the stupidity of the movies. Pr0n has better plot, better script and sent a more clear and powerful political statement.
Never again will I promise someone that I will see a movie with here and see it all the way through.
. Quit playing Monopoly with Bill. Switch to one of many non-Microsoft products today.
Mod parent down for bringing up bad memories of the time my dad rented that on DVD and we watched it. I mean, I have nightmares about paying full price to see that movie in the theaters now.
Haec merda tauri est. Ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.
Nevertheless, it was worlds better than William Shatner's directing debut. Episode six (the undiscovered country) was equally miserable.
Horrid, horrid movie. Went to see it with three friends (all of us Asimov fans) when it came out. Spent the following 20 minutes tearing it to shreds. Finally, one of the guys working there came up, agreed with us, and suggested that we sneak into the movie that was starting two screens down. First time I ever had a theater employee suggest a freebie....
The Man Who Saved the World
So bad that being "good" bad like Plan Nine or any othe Ed Wood movie, isn't even possible. Yet cheesy enough to watch some (I dare you to not fast forward) and get a few laughs.
Absoultely horrible. A complete waste of time. An atrocious waste of time, money, actors, makeup, special effects, popcorn, you name it. Abominable.
This is not a joke -- I'm not try to encourage you to see the movie. It really is bad.
The. Worst. Movie. Ever.
it was not even related to the books hardly. the rewrite of the story and the fact that you lost the feeling of the first 2 have totaly ruined the movie series for me.
I am the Alpha and the Omega-3
Vanilla Sky was the absolute worst movie I have ever seen. Hands down.
IMDB entry here. This movie was so bad that it became the standard by which all other atrocious movies were judged by my friends and me. "That was bad, but it was no Iron Warrior."
Dogma? I saw this for free, and when the person who invited my girlfriend and I to see it came over afterwards and asked us if we liked it, her succint response was
Oh God, it was so fucking awful
I'd have to nominate Good Will Hunting as well.
Torvalds started an OS which is used a lot in science, helping explain the universe. You, know, in 20 years it might become hard to tell who was more important.
Future Wiki -- If you don't think about the future, you cannot have one.
Well, I was certainly shocked to search the comments and see nothing about that movie. I expected some of the Busheviks to jump to the obvious bait. Actually, I FINALLY got to see it yesterday, but I certainly don't think it was the worst movie I've seen. If you're curious, here's a link to my comments about the Japanese premier:
;-)
http://shanenj.tripod.com/blogger.html
On the actual topic of worst movie, that's really tough. There are so MANY really bad movies out there, and I think I've mostly managed to avoid the worst ones by benefiting from the reports of other people's mistakes. I'd tend to vote for "Plan 9 from Outer Space", and it really was awful, and apparently Ed Wood really believed it was not awful, but it's still a campy choice...
I think to be REALLY awful a movie has to tread a thin line. If it's bad enough, then you'll just turn it off and then you haven't really seen it. A REALLY bad movie has to suck you in and get you to waste your precious time, somehow believing it isn't really as bad as it seems--until the final moments, when you realize that you have been totally wasted.
I suppose in a worst case, you wouldn't realize you'd been wasted until you watched it the SECOND time.
Anyway, the moderation of this post shall be a metric of the number of Busheviks with mod points.
Freedom = (Meaningful - Coerced) Choice != (Speech | Beer^2), and sad sock puppets' bad mods avail them naught.
You know it's true.
It is no longer uncommon to be uncommon.
Just saw "Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004)" last night.
Absolutely stupid.
A better article would be "what is the best movie you ever saw."
So remarkably bad, I could hardly beleive it was released. Some of the eyeball monstors didn't were a custome, they just wore their union suits. The daylight wasn't consistant - one moment it was daylight, then is night, then it was daylight again.
If they spent more than $100 making this movie, I'd be surprised.
1. The Stupids - Starring Tom Arnold. I wanted a refund. 2. Urban Menace - Starring "Snoop Dogg" which was a DVD gift from a family member. AWFUL. I couldn't GIVE it away on Ebay. 3. Bones - Another "Snoop Dogg" movie very similar to "Urban Menace". Only this time it was "Made by black people for black people." - I'm quite sure black people hated it too. 4. Vulgar - Kevin Smith worked on this one with Brian Johnson. Total piece of shit. 5. Dusk till dawn 2 - Where's George? WTF is this CRAP? 6. Crow II and III - I'm sure you know. 7. Superman 4 - A perfect example of how to ruin a franchise. 8. Showdown in Little Tokyo - what's up with the homoerotic relationship between Brandon Lee and Dolph Lundgren? 9. Gigli - Thank you Ben and Jenny. 10. Blaire Witch Project 2
What a joke...
Was that supposed to be a comedy?
Much to the chagrin of our girlfriends and the rest of the people nearby in the theater, my buddy and I couldn't stop laughing and cutting on that movie...
Sigh...
Windows is not the answer.
Windows is the question.
The answer is "NO."
Really bad french cinema and people taking sh&ts on screen. This is the only movie I've ever walked out on.
Frank W. Miller
Add me to the list. I hired the VHS when it first come out and only watched the first 30 minutes. This was in the day when ANY movie on VHS was a novelty.
Second worst movie has to be "Extreme Days" which has a bunch of bad acting mixed with extreme sport videos that are too obviously unrelated to the story or the actors therein, even though they pass it off as if the actors are the ones doing the surfing, etc. Lame.
Bar none, worst movie ever.
Verhoeven read the book, and noticed that the book was, at least at one level, militaristic (and arguably fascist) propaganda of the kind that convinced Germans to come invade his ancestral homeland in 1940. So, he decided to make a movie that was a pisstake on Nazi propaganda and pro-war propaganda more generally. And he did that very well, and quite subtly in parts. Watch Triumph of the Will and then watch Starship Troopers again. Or, if you're American, cast your mind back to the bullshit ra-ra media coverage you got before the Iraq invasion and then watch Starship Troopers again.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from a rigged demo
--Andy Finkel (J. Klass?)
I just thought it was a joke: Shrek, troll, get it?
It was written/produced/directed by John Boorman (whose previous success was Deliverance). So, it's hard to argue that the guy's a fool, or that he didn't get to make what he wanted to make. If you give him some credit, I think you can watch the movie and get something out of it. It shares a similar feel to another great late 60's/early 70's weirdfest, The Prisoner (the tv show).
He kills a giant bat and uses it's rigid corpse to hang glide into the bad guy's lair.
Oh, and he's not really a hunter, nor is he from the future. He's from space...
Dewey, you fool! Your decimal system has played right into my hands!
Plan 9 from Outer Space is usually considered Ed Wood's worst filem and therefore the worst film of all time, but I think Glen or Glenda is a lot worse. A bad story about a tranvestite with bad acting. Pull the strings! Pull the strings!
Battlefield Earth.
I've already said more that I can stomach about this topic.
My favorite quote from a review of Show Girls. "Breasts, breasts, and more breasts. I like breasts too, but I never thought they could act."
Rabbit Test
Plot (from IMDb): Lionel's life turns around after a one-night stand on top of a pinball table... he becomes the world's first pregnant man!
Steve Magruder, Metro Foodist
was 'Yor: Hunter of the Future'
Its the most horrible movie I am aware of. For an inexplicable reason, I have seen it twice.
I think you underestimate just how much I just dont care.
The worst movie I've ever had by far is Joe vs Volcano
Psychos in Love circa 1987.
A "horror/suspense" about two psycho killers that fall in love. Delightfully bad and it revels in its own hideousness.
Jonathan B.
I'm not sure if its been put out there yet, but this is one of the worst.
REMEMBER! I was drunk when I posted this...
Titanic has a moral and an important lesson for us all.
When the shit hits the fan dump the bitch or you will die.
I used to have a cool sig, back when I cared
Freddy Got Fingered
-Justin Winokur www.PhotosByJustin.com
This movie is one of the most brilliant I've ever seen. It doesn't use the same language as other films, and this throws a lot of people off, but the messages in it are stunning. I'm convinced that people who don't like this film are almost certainly victims of the very forces Joe was trying to overcome. This film, back when I was a teen, was pivotal in my own escape from the 'machine' of society which chews people up and makes their lives miserable.
One of the many lines in this movie:
"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep - everybody you know, everybody you see, everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake, and that they live in a state of constant, total amazement."
-FL
This is just truly awful. Patrick Stewart, Tobe Hooper directing and Dan O'Bannon writing, and it's still dire.
Naked female space vampires wandering about for half the movie fail to compensate for the sheer crappiness of the whole thing. The only ridiculous plot twist I didn't see coming a mile away was when the hero uses the space shuttle's previously unmentioned one-man escape pod.
It's not bad enough to enjoy for being bad, and it's not stupid enough to enjoy when you're drunk.
It manages to make crap like 'Event Horizon' or 'Lost In Space' look like 'The Godfather'.
Stand by Me,
The Shawshank Redemption,
The Green Mile.
-FL
I shelled out the $7 or whatever the DVD cost, its good fun, and most of the computer stuff (aside from the fractal crap) was right. Its up there with the decent hacker movies, like Sneakers and Wargames, and it doesn't suck big floppy donkey dick like The Net.
"Sic Semper Tyrannosaurus Rex."
Brrr. I'd successfully blocked the memory until now. Owww. Head-ache returning. .
-FL
And i'm watching Jurassic Park and they just got the the "Its a unix system, i know this" part.
"Sic Semper Tyrannosaurus Rex."
Is it really that bad? I dont know a single person whos actually seen it...
"Sic Semper Tyrannosaurus Rex."
What a waste of celluloid.
Of course, that's just my opinion. I know a lot of people really liked that one, but I was really disappointed. It was mindless and the jokes seemed juvenile and stupid. I was hoping for another thoughtful and insightful work like "Dogma".
--I'm certainly not a Christian or a Catholic, but I can appreciate the amount of personal exploration into those subjects that Kevin Smith invested. And with a sense of humor, too! That sort of film makes going to movies worth the $10 bucks or whatever it is these days!
-FL
The book was loads better. Also, the TV show was pretty good, and from what i've heard the second movie is better than the first.
"Sic Semper Tyrannosaurus Rex."
The problem is that the two worst movies I have ever seen arn't even rateable. Demoni is almost certianly the worst, and is the only movie I have ever demanded my money back for. It just seems to have a following amongst the "Fangoria" types, it is, after all, entirely composed of the erata central to that mentality. Meanwhile Author! Author! is an Al Pachino movie in which absolutely nothing of any interest to anyone ever happens. It is a tiny and featureless expanse of sachrine. For truely variant reasons both of these movies are worse than, say, "Street Fighter". Hell, you could at least laugh at "Future War". Awful movies can transcend into art, rasing the question of when does "simply bad" become "accidental satire"? The problem is that the truely bad movies don't even attract enough interest to be voted down into the gutters where they belong. So the fiew niche participants (e.g. "I love anything Pachino no mater what") skew the results with their fetishist participation while the informed masses can't even lower themselves to the effort of pressing the little yellow button... 8-) The only real measure of "bad movie" must be a quantum state measure of emptyness... you know, a true expression of entropy. So Author! Author! edges out Demoni buy just a hair...
Innocent people shouldn't be forced to pay for inferior software development.
--"Code Complete" Microsoft Press
yeah...
"Sic Semper Tyrannosaurus Rex."
Mod the parent down before more are made aware that such a movie existed!
Trolls lurk everywhere. Mod them down.
The fact that VCR's didn't exist back then made movies something far more special than they are today. --A show like that allowed you to visit old friends again, and friends are such that you forgive blemishes and shoddy production values.
And actually, even as an adult, seeing Han and Chewie take out storm troopers was pretty cool!
-FL
Why this fucking horrid movie has such a devoted following is utterly beyond me. It was quite obviously low budget, the costumes stank, the acting was horrible (ESPECIALLY Nicol Williamson, the guy playing Merlin. That fucking hack couldn't be more ham-handed if he were fistfucking Ms. Piggy), the sets stank, it was crummily written and directed, the score often didn't fit, it was uneven and lurched all over the damn place at the drop of a hat, often it was utterly confusing and nonsensical...the list goes on. Need I mention that Boorman had just directed The Excorcist 2 (which is on the list) just before he laid this steamy pile?
Battlefield Earth was pretty crap lousey... stupid manimals...
e.
Build Your Own PVR/HTPC news, reviews, &
Oh my god.
I got a free pass to a preview screening of Ecks vs Sever. It was so bad that I felt like I was owed some money back.
Does it make you happy you're so strange?
I suppose I should have known that any movie using a dodgy fright break gimmick for promotion would be inherently bad.
For those scratching their heads, Blood Moon was an appalling bad Australian horror movie made about fifteen years back. It was seriously lacking in plot, characterisation and horror, but it did have a high cheese content.
It's noticable that this forgetable piece of shite has been overlooked by everyone. It was never released on video, never shown on television and even IMDB doesn't list it. So there's a good chance no one else will never have to suffer sitting though it.
So the lesson learned was that if they offer to give you your money back at a set point in the film, take it and run, it isn't going to get any better.
and the werewolves came...
and they ate him...
and they drank his beer...
The English Patient Operation Dumbo Drop Bubble Boy All three of these were by far the worst movies that I had ever seen, and the only three that I have ever walked out of the theatre on.
jen0r all your base are belong to... me
--A truly fantastic, compelling idea done very, very, very badly. I swore at the time, sitting in a packed theater on opening day, that if I ever ran into either of those idiots, I was going to punch them in the stomach. --To return the favor for how I felt after watching that piece of drek.
What I find interesting is that more than one of their films have already been mentioned in this series of posts!
Although, for sheer crapola that I paid to see was Mark Hamill's "Time Runner". Just plain shit; basically a student/fan film which Mark agreed to act in for the helluvit and as a result, made it into theaters. It was my own fault for having expectations. --Interestingly, because of his willingness to do stupid films just 'cuz, Hamill remains one of my all-time favorite actors. He's a guy who really, really doesn't care about his professional image. There are very few actors who can claim this. This is true coolness. Anybody who worries about image is, by definition, seeking validation and therefore not cool. I'd put Hamill in a similar league as William Shatner and maybe Adam West. These are comfortable guys who are actually happy in life, and as a result, do awesome work from time to time.
And one of the coolest quotes I've ever heard actually came from the set of "Time Runner"; Hamill was being interviewed. The production was taking place in some small town and he was asked, "Wow. Do they even get cable out here?"
To which Mark answered, "Well, they have cable, but I don't know if they get it."
-FL
As one who absolutely loves bad movies, I can't believe no one has mentioned Zarkorr! the Invader or Kraa! The Sea Monster. Take one part man in obvious rubber monster suit, a dash of poorly designed miniture sets for the ahem... monster... to destroy, and a director that is absolutely certain that his monster movies are the best ever conceived by man. I actually highly recommend these movies for their comedic value... I couldn't stop laughing!
I would also recommend The Item... independant film with people gliding around on Segways complete with "Woosh" sound-effects... Don't miss it!
Seed People is another movie that is sure to please. It is the collective theory of my friends and I that the movie was funded by several people who worked at Dunkin' Donuts for a day. During the few hours they worked, they stole several containers of glaze that was used in a... violent... glazing in the movie.
In all seriousness, I loved these movies. I could go on and on about great bad movies... But this is about BAD movies... If I really have to recommend a bad film that I couldn't even sit through, it would be Dead Creatures. Despite getting a 5.2 on IMDB (what are those people thinking!), the movie appeared to have no plot, I don't even think the characters had names, and Dr. Mitten Piston (don't ask!)... What's up with that?!?? The movie was so awful, we had to watch it in fast forward and make up our own dialog... Try it, it's fun!
.. this was my wife's instant response and it's tough to argue. Never have I seen a movie with so much nudity so unerotic.
DO NOT DISTURB THE SE
This was so bad that it was funny. The flying saucers, the cemetary. Didn't Bela Lugosi die during filming, and they replaced him with a guy who used a cape to hide his face? The cheap sets and even cheaper special effects. It's so bad that it's funny. Horrible story line. Bad acting.
-- No sig for you!
This is a thrill the first time you see it high...it is a sci fi drama called The Cube and features an unknown cast of characters trapped in an alien's cube shaped, ever chaning space craft/dungeon.
Really bad but fun for an evening.
I only came here to do two things; kick some ass, and drink some beer...looks like we're almost out of beer.
Only on /. would this get modded as +4 Insightful.
I just got a mental image of 100's of nerds rushing out of their house to try and find a copy of the movie
3 words: Super Mario Brothers. Toad not a Red spotted Mushroom? Blasphme!!!!
Insert Pithy Quote here.
-FL
In the director's cut, they all read Jump Jets for Dummies, so it's really not a plot hole.
It's not offtopic, dumbass. It's orthogonal.
easily the worst I have seen, made my girlfriend leave early because of sea-sickness. She forced me to go back in to find out how it ends. Felt like cheering as each person got killed, then the end, where the monster wasn't even shown. You could hear the groans in the cinema.
Followed closely by Black Hole, from Disney or something, with lines like: "... our mission is to seek out habitable life."
"If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate." - Zapp Brannigan
I assure you my original post was not a troll. I am a big fan of CG-animated movies. I loved Ice Age, which had even more simplistic animation than Shrek, because it at least had it's own style and artistic quality, in the same way that South Park is not gorgeous but it has a unique style. Shrek looked like it was trying to be Toy Story, but it failed.
I agree that the second and third films weren't as good as the first.
But if you want to see a really bad version of LotR, see the animated movie directed by Ralph Bakshi entitled simply The Lord of the Rings. It's quite humorous to watch.
"Bingo" is, without a doubt, the worst movie I have ever seen. I nearly gave up movies permanently after seeing it. Don't watch this movie unless you really enjoy self-torture. The mental anguish this film gives you will never go away completely. And you'll want to kick every dog you see.
After all these years, the memory is still burned into our brains. Make it stop!
Can You Say Linux? I Knew That You Could.
I found 'The English Patient' interesting because of this, actually. It seemed that about half the people who watched the film had the same reaction I did; they actually couldn't follow the narrative logic. To me it seemed a series of disconnected scenes with a lot of characters who may or may not have been the same people. My girlfriend, at the time, though, loved it and teared up while explaining the plot to me. There was even a Seinfeld episode done regarding people's reactions to this film!
I've only run into this phenomenon once before, and it was in an English class where we read a brief short story.
I honestly found the story utterly impenetrable while everybody else in the class just read it without any hassles and answered all the questions. I felt like I was trying to cut through some sort of advanced math where the words were obeying some kind of different grammatical law. It was like I was suffering from a very specific form of brain damage just in regard to that one story. Very strange. 'The English Patient' had the same effect on me.
-FL
Home Alone.
And that Mc kid. Second worst actor ever. Worst actor was the kid on Growing Pains.
Have you read my journal today?
I was running a movie theater in 1996, and we got to have a special sneak preview of the movie Ed. I put the film together, and my dad, four year old son, and I started to watch it. Seeing as it was a kid's film I figured we'd get both the pleasure of seeing it in peace and making sure I spliced it together properly. Fifteen minutes into the movie the kid was playing with his cars in the aisle of the theater, and my father and I couldn't believe this wasn't a straight to video movie.
When the pinacle of humor in a film is a monkey farting, it's time to seriously consider execution for talentless writers that turn out drivel like this. I hope whoever wrote and produced this turkey is asking, "Would you like fries with that?" somewhere now.
Say what you want about bad films like Plan 9, Bride of the Monster, or other such films. (Ed Wood's catalog is such an easy target!) There's much to be said about trying to make Independence Day on a Clerks budget. Imagine Wood's visions with a real budget and special effects dept. A remake of Plan 9 as Wood saw it in his head might be a pretty good film.
OTOH all the budget and special effects in the world couldn't help a dud like Ed.
There are two seasons in my world - Hockey and Construction
until you've seen a movie where they not only invent the sword, but also the bow and arrow, you just haven't seen a movie...and sam pasco...could that guy be any more oiled up? i didn't think cave men could be so beefy...
My mistake then. I've only seen Shrek once, and it was quite a while ago. Its likely that I just wasn't remembering all the visual details. I guess that just drives the point home that a number of people were trying to make, that criticism about a generally well liked movie is still perfectly valid.
...have a guy stand behind you and scream three of the most annoying words to you in the english language for 90 mins and you will have a better time than if you watched Freddy Got Fingered.
As a rock-in-roll Physicist once said, No matter where you go, there you are.
Revenge - 199something, I loath this movie too much to look it up.
Sure, Manos and some of the others are bad, but given the level of their directing and acting and budget, what could they aspire to? This move had Anthony Quinn, Kevin Costner and a bunch of other name actors. It is the only movie I have ever seen that started with a sold out house and ended with almost no one in the theatre - yes, to my everlasting shame, I went to see this thing in the theatre. Now, Highlander 2 was BAD, but it was still dealing with a cult, genre audience. This movie had no excuses for the bad acting, bad directing, bad screenplay, and just the all around stench that emanated from the screen every moment it was up there. I don't even recommend that you check it out as a monument to bad film-making - it is so bad nothing positive could ever come from any experience with it. Sometimes we don't learn from out mistakes, sometimes they're just unmitigated crap.
THE YEAR WAS 2081, and everybody was finally equal...
I like the subtle stabs at Disney
Same here. I wholeheartedly recommend DreamWorks' Shrek to Losing Nemo visitors whose kids are old enough to see PG movies.
I saw the movie years ago. I still want that hour and a half of my life back!
----- "I'm still sane on three planets and two moons."
Double plus ungood troll
I know it is hard to imagine, but there are actually people out there who think for themselves instead of just repeating the party line.
We are all individuals ... I'm not ... shhhh!
Such a shame, it had so much promise. I mean Nemo
Something smells fishy about that name.
The only movie I've ever walked out of.
The worst movie I ever saw was West New York. I rented it thinking, "Gangs and extortion. There's got to be some car chases and explosions in there." Nope. Weak dialog, boring plot, and only one very cheesy gunfight.
But there is one complaint I have. Looking at the top 250, I'm noticing that The Lord of the Rings trilogy is rated only slightly lower than The Shawshank Redemption. The Lord of the Rings was a blatant selling out of my childhood memories of reading the books. They took the main events and added bad dialog, cookie cutter-ified characters and special effects in the new Hollywood formula that successfully tricked much of the population into believing that it was a brilliant movie. Bah. I can only hope that time brings the movie down to the average "5.0" it deserves, or lower.
~Ben
Of course M. Night Shyamalan's films are inconsistent in quality. They have to be; he works for Disney, of course ;-)
A very pretensious remake of the Road Warrior. It is bad the same way Battlefield Earth is bad.
Religion is the main cause of atheism.
The worst movies I can think of in the last couple years are Charlies Angeles 2 and Punch Drunk Love. Really Bad for different reasons...
The premise of a modding system that includes, for example, the ability to mark something "Funny" is based at least in part on opinion, so logically this whole argument is tainted.
As for the movies, I think it is important to consider the perspective of whoever you ask. Shrek, for example, teaches (not preaches) tolerance based on reason and love. It also has a decent amount of simple yet contemporary humor. If someone has the idea that they've somehow transcended some of these elements, they may close themselves off to the movie altogether and make pejorative remarks about it.
Personally, when I watch just about anything, I can pick out or identify with some element or aspect of it. Heartbreaking and vulnerable personalities show themselves through the fence-cracks of even the most offensive, smarmy or tedious of situations or people.
For example, earlier today, a young couple was sitting on the steps of an apartment building. I didn't bear any connection to them at all; I just looked at them by accident. She was smiling at him, and he smiled back at her. Then he looked away, and I knew at that moment that he didn't care about her, and that he was thinking about it. And he'd probably think about it later too, and struggle with it, and then awkwardly deal with it and feel better.
I guess all I'm trying to say is that, at least for me, trying to remain "open" has been valuable. The feelings that lurk in me probably lurk darker in those who dodge my eyes on the sidewalk.
It is more likely that King ripped off Killdozer with both Maximum Overdrive and that shitty movie about the pink caddilac killer car.
Please help metamoderate.
"What would you consider the worst movie ever made?"
i can not consider Battle field earth the worst movie ever made. Simple because I have not seen it.
Why yes, I am a luck bastard.
How ever the wuestion is You, not us.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
How the hell can you hate The Big Lebowski? It's probably one of the funniest movies I've seen in years. Hell, I still drink White Russians to this day because of that movie.
My preference over SB, but then I understand the original Japanese dialogue.
Great ballroom dancing movie nonetheless.
If you don't want to repeat the past, stop living in it.
"Do not however make fun of ninjas - for they are the one true Real Ultimate Power!"
The plural for Ninja is Ninja! You must now sing the Ninja song!
Ha! HAHA! HA!
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
The plot was right from the worse of the AD&D novels. The cinematography was of a quality that most high school film classes would grade a "D", or lower. The acting was so wooden they made the sets for the next no budget film from it. FX? It is to laugh, except they make you cry.
I paid money to see that Turkey, and I want my 94 minutes back, to Hell with the money. It wasn't even bad enough to be good, it was just bad.
Garry AKA -Phoenix- Rising Above the Flames
Si hoc legere scis nimium eruditionis habes
Boy, they weren't kidding, were they.
..don't panic
Without a doubt, 'TERMS OF ENDEARMENT' was the worst movie I've ever seen. It left an enduringly bad taste in my mouth. It was a complete waste of admittedly great talent. Why did they even bother..? Yuck.
Jedis are stupid. If they were so powerful, why couldn't they handle counseling for a kid who missed his mom?
William Shatner never really could act and he couldn't write a book either, but had to put his name on the author line of a famous freelancer's science fiction books. The real proof is in a little known movie called "Incubus" which was shot in complete earnest in the 60s in the rare language Esperanto (once supposed to be the international language) on black and white. Where would they use this language? In Hollywood, believe it or not. If it wasn't shot in Esperanto with English subtitles, we might just have to know fully how bad the young Shatner's acting actually was.
-Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase temporary safety deserve neither. -Ben Franklin
I listened to an interview of the director, and he said:
"Signs was a end of the world movie that takes place in a house."
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
The only way watching this could be any worse is if they had sent wrestlers through the theater every 20 minutes to kick me in the nuts.
All the artsy-fartsy critic types will now chirp about how I just don't understand the deeper meaning and the critical vision of this movie. But for me, the Thin Red Line is like being on the back end of anal sex: no matter how good you say it is, I'm not convinced, nor am I willing to accept convincing. And I'm happy to live without understanding.
"I woo women with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing."
Don't for get the hollywood 1 in 5 rules.
You can make 1 greate movie, then 5 bad ones and still be good enough to get scripts.
This means that you can do some movies just for the money. So Somebody makes a file with a 200 million dollars gross. He can take a loosy script, 20million, make a dog of a film and still get 20+ million for the next one.
"How about the aliens who could not get thru a locked pantry door. "
hmmm, perhaps they don't have door knobs or locks? they are Alien, so to put a Human experience and say someone from a different planet, or galaxy should know it is a short coming on the viewer.
Not that oit was a good movie.
The Kruger Dunning explains most post on
Edit out the lollipop scene and you've got a truly painful to watch movie. Of course, it's the strange kind of scenario that could acutally happen... Much more plausible than "Indecent Proposal". It may not be truly a "bad" movie, but watching it is like a swallowing a dry asprin tablet.
actually the movie experience was significantly eased by the fact that you could ogle Lucy Liu throughout the movie.
Hard to believe a movie version of that classic TV show could be so bad, especially with Sean Connery and Uma Thurman in it. Uma and the twit who played John Steed skipped blithely through their parts like two acting students running lines before class. What a major disappointment.
Even in American style democracies, some are not allowed to vote - young people below a certain age and some categories of criminals. The goal is the same: not to have socially irresponsible voters. Heinleins version of democracy is much better than the present media-led farce.
Sad because no one has mentioned Steven Seagal's "On Deadly Ground."
See, I believe what separates the creme de la creme here from the other merely godawful movies is that the truly bad ones make you ANGRY. You should sit there in the theater (or on the couch, or whatever) and feel like the director and producers have unzipped their pants and pissed on you in their total lack of respect for you. You should get the distinct impression that the studio execs who greenlighted it hate you and/or think you're an idiot.
So, Plan Nine didn't make me ANGRY. Manos didn't make me ANGRY. Howard the Duck made my wife ANGRY, but I never saw it so I can't comment. Evidently Battlefield Earth made a lot of people angry, but come on: No film is more insulting than "On Deadly Ground."
I mean, how about the scene in the bar where SS kicks some oil worker's butt, then another one, just some guy at the bar, says something like "Don't fuck with oil workers!" and attacks him? Just as an excuse so SS can kick EVERYONE'S butt! I mean, since when do oil workers have such awesome solidarity that they'd attack a Kung Fu master to salvage the honor of their brothers, especially since by then it was too late to save Oil Worker #1 from getting his ass kicked anyway? If I was in a bar kicking some veterinarian's ass, would some other vet say "Don't fuck with veterinarians!" and jump on me?! It's ludicrous!
And that's just the smallest example. How about when the evil corporate guys with hair-trigger tempers machine gun all the Eskimos. Yeah, massacring half a village would be easy to cover up! Or when SS dynamites the refinery, killing countless janitors, cooks, technicians, etc in addition to a handful of evil corporate suits and their assassin friends. WTF!?!? I WANT ANSWERS!!
Whew, sorry about that. But it just goes to prove that a truly awful film has to make you ANGRY, and it should be a lingering, burning anger that only grows over time.
- Alaska Jack
I definitely wouldn't considered Shrek as "worst", but I didn't like it either. As you have said, I couldn't connect, root or feel anything towards the characters.
At the same time I saw Monsters, Inc. and it still is one of my favourite movies, and probably the best Pixar movie so far.
I think that you can like Event Horizon even if you went to see a sci-fi movie.
I don't like horror movies much (matter of fact, Event Horizon was possibly the first that I enjoyed).
When I went to see Event Horizon, I thought that it was like Contact -- a sort of nonviolent sciency sci-fi movie. Then I thought that they were just building up atmosphere. Boy, that made the shock much greater.
I agree that after you see the "flaming human body" too many times, it starts to get a bit old, but overall, I liked the acting, and I think that the environments that they came up with weren't unreasonable. And it has people that don't act like idiots! No "let's split up!"
May we never see th
If you're having a hard time paying attention, try finding the one shot in the film where the framing is actually parallel to the ground rather than at some rakish (arty?) angle. I dare you. I double-dare you.
Chicken.
pants
Ok then, how about this: a banana tree could run the country just as well as the current administration. He pretty much just sits there like one, it seems, and lets all his handlers -- er, cabinet -- make the real decisions. And of course each member has his own agenda and doesn't really see the big picture, and we've seen where that's led.
Here's a little tidbit from the 9/11 report (I'm regurgitating from memory of a Salon.com article, so corrections welcome): before 9/11, when informed of the fact that there were some 70 ongoing FBI investigations into Al-Qaeda activities (investigations initiated under Clinton), he responded with the equivalent of "Oh, that's nice. What's for dinner?". Clinton, on the other hand, was nearly obsessed with the problem, at least since the Millenium airport-bombing attempt. He held weekly meetings where he forced the FBI and CIA guys to tell them everything relevant, thus circumventing the "wall" between the two agencies.
In other words (my interpretation): Clinton left the intelligence mechanisms set up to work well under strong leadership; under Bush, they were left on autopilot, and it all just drifted along until you-know-what happened. Bush has said he would have "moved Heaven and Earth" to stop the attack, if only he knew exactly when/where/what would happen. It's not too reassuring to me to know that it would have required such a precise find from one of those pre-existing investigations to have gotten Bush to lift a finger to do something about it.
"Orthodoxy is unconsciousness" - Orwell
You mean like Plan 9 From Outerspace was redeemed by burning paper plates?
- Voice of Ambience -
F-9/11 by Michael Moore. That movie is garbage.
A correction: Here the community moderates (and users can choose to browse at -1 if they want), at Fark the moderators censor. There's a difference.
"Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel." - A.B.
Must be Doctor Gore.. I actually bought that on dvd without having seen it (standard practice for me a lot of the time. That time I regretted it.. ZZZZzzzzzZZZZzz is my comment.. And the boom shows at the end damnit!
Amen. Fark and its petty, back-slapping clique of moderators make this place look like a model of great democracy.
Here is what happened to me there. (Shameless plug.)
And just to get slightly on topic, three of the worst films I've suffered through recently (OTOH) are "Troy", "Attack of the Clones", and "The Hole". I don't mind lightweight fluff, or stupid "so bad it's good" type things, but I hate self-important twaddle that wastes talent. That talent could be good actors, good SFX people, good set designers, whatever. It's a crime.
As someone else has already pointed out, it was a dramatization of propaganda. The characters spoke ridiculous dialogue because it perfectly mirrored the ridiculous logic of war-time rhetoric. If you watch the movie again, you'll notice some of the more disturbing elements and parallels to the present-day international scene -- that the aliens might have been provoked, that the initial belief is that the aliens are too stupid to possibly fight back effectively, that the great joy at the end comes from the realization that now the aliens are afraid...
Is it some of the best satire/parody/whatever ever made? Probably not, but it adds a layer of depth and subtext usually absent from bad movies.
--------
Bleah! Heh heh heh... BLEAH BLEAH!!! Ha ha ha ha...
>was sick of all the blatant product placement in the film... it was beyond absurd
You haven't seen "I, Robot" then? So much blatent advertising for Audi, Panasonic, and Converse!
Ed Wood's _Glen or Glenda_
XXX and that last james bond were so bad i even though about leaving the theatre (which i would normally never do).
On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.
My sweetie likes Heath Ledger, and she dragged me to see "The Order". I was squirming in my seat the entire time. Not only was the story and acting lame, but the whole thing about the "sin eaters" was blasphemous.
"I'm not a cool person in real life, but I play one on the Internet". Galley
You know how you drift through the intro to a movie, and wake up when something starts to happen? Well, with Poor Cow, it says "THE END" and you look at your watch and it's been an hour and half and the movie hasn't started yet. This woman's life was lifeless, and the movie was lifeless, so it was a great movie, yes?
Mulholland Drive is very good, it just doesn't have a linear narrative and it doesn't lead the viewer by the hand. It's a straight thriller once you've reconstructed the storyline, but a large proportion of the fun is to find out all the clues the filmmaker has given to the audience to be able to do that job. It's like an oldfashion puzzle.
Note that I don't claim to understand everything about that film but I have an interpretation. There is a great article on Salon about that film.
GodZilla 2000 is the only movie that I've actually purchased yet never seen in its entirety - and I'll watch dran near anything. I thought it'd be acceptable, since the soundtrack was good. I aws totaly wrong. Other movies are badly done, or I just don't like, but G2K is straight up the worst movie ever. It's bad but not at all entertainingly bad.
:)
Then again, I've never seen Titanic...
Civil Action. The previews showed a bigass explosion (ok, their editing made it look real big). The movie, however, was like a made for TV (Hallmark Channel) melodrama. It was nothing like the previews. It also sucked. I can handle a crappy scifi or even a crappy chick flick. This movie was so bad I couldn't even sleep through it. Argh.
I enjoyed the fact that it ended.
"Dave, I stand still--the conclusions jump to me!" - Bill McNeal, NewsRadio
The art director decided that they were making the characters and sets too lifelike, and to avoid the creepy look of Final Fantasy or Final Flight of the Osiris, they went the complete opposite direction and used a very simplistic, cartoon-like style for animation, texture and lighting.
:-)
You're supposed to focus on the dialog. Not the scenery. You know, a comedy.
THIS THING CAN TURN ON A DIME, MACROSSZERO STYLE ALSO FUCK BETA, ~NYORON
To me, the wrost movie I ever seen is Signs. I think it is one of the most boring movies I've ever seen. If Mel Gibson didn't play a a role in it, I would never choose to watch. And the truth is that my first impression is right: this movie sucks.
I distinctly remember that it was the first movie I ever turned off halfway through. I still don't know how it ended, and I still don't care.
BEDEVERE: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
VILLAGER #2: Burn!
VILLAGER #1: Burn!
CROWD: Burn! Burn them up! Burn!...
BEDEVERE: And what do you burn apart from witches?
VILLAGER #1: More witches!
I think the worst film of all time has to be "On Deadly Ground". I still believe to this day that Michael Caine's career should have died after that one.
-- Using the preview button since 2005
I've heard the book is excellent and I believe that the film is probably very well made but it's just bloody impossible to sit through.
On Deadly Ground is pretty terrible as well.
-- Using the preview button since 2005
You can't make a fully animated movie and expect everyone to ignore the animation. I did pay attention to the dialog/story, and I thought that was bad, too.
Has anyone else seen this horrible piece of junk? It's not good-bad like you can enjoy on MST3K, it's just truly awful. I couldn't get past 10 minutes.
The only movie my friends and I walked out on in high school. Mind you, we had pretty low standards in those days, set by such masterpieces as "Deathstalker" (http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0087127/), and even this didn't meet them.
Does anyone else remember a glut of awful movies in the early 80's from places like Italy and Argentina? The Italian zombie flics were a riot (complete with babies eating their mothers, etc.).
I still can't believe the major theater chains were showing these. I also can't believe the families that would show up for these. The 2 year old at Deathstalker that screamed every time someone got smushed by the guy with the giant hammer was real annoying. I wonder what he's like today? (the kid, not the guy with the hammer)
Expressing an opinion on a dramatic device used in a movie is not a "troll", even if I'm pissing on a movie you happen to like. Not everyone likes the same things. Get the hell over it.
News for Nerds. Stuff that Matters? Like hell.
I laughed my ass off at the scene where he plays "Daddy would you like some sausage" on the piano to mock his father for (allegedly) being a child molestor.
I didn't particularly enjoy the horse masturbation scene. In fact, I think my sister walked out during that one.
-a
I'm not a moronic sheep! *I* can program in Visual Basic! .. okay. I *AM* a moronic sheep.
Followed closely by Star Wars: The Phantom Menace.
8mm was the worst movie ever concieved/produced/presented. Terrible dialog, lame plot, and the beginning of Cage's downfall. Simply horrid, uninsightful, uneventful, and a waste of my $8.
-bZj
.sig
Here's a link to 6 full pages of line-by-line factual backup for F 9/11.... http://www.michaelmoore.com/warroom/f911notes/inde x.php?id=16
I went to see cliffhanger on the big screen with hungarian friends in the summer of that year.
I started to laugh when rocky balboa was trying to climb in the cold. Eventually, I felt on the floor laughing and I couldn't get back because of the pain. When my head passed over the top of he seat in front, I looked at the screen and fall back laughing and crouching. Some people were amused, other were pissed.
Now, I cannot see rambo without laughing. Even Cop Land where he makes a depressive face cannot sadden me.
Men are born ignorant, not stupid; they are made stupid by education. Bertrand Russel
A lot of police academy movies on that IMDB bottom 100 list. Jeez, and I loved the corny things.. especially Jones, Hightower, and Tackleberry :]p
The IMDB rating is 5.6 for this piece of trash. I just don't understand that.
Shame on you Mel! What would Mad Max have thought, given his world was the end result of this kind of message?
-FL
I have the DVD of Apocalypse Now Redux, with an additional 45 minutes of footage. For those who haven't seen the original, the movie was set in the middle of the Vietnam War, and centered around a Special Forces captain who was sent to assassinate a renegade Colenel operating in the jungles of Cambodia. Along the way it explores, ad nauseum, the absurdities of the war and how it was fought.
At about 3 hours in the original cut, I thought the original Apocalypse Now was a biting, though longish commentary on how not to fight a war. There were excesses for sure, but I thought the original held together well enough to make those excesses bearable.
Enter the Redux version (spoiler alert):
The extra 45 minutes centers around 2 additional scenes: The first additional scene centers around a muddy riverside supply depot, which had been all but abandoned, and forsaken by the powers that be. Its commander was killed in an attack two months previously, and the few remaining GI's occupying it were reduced to pimping out some Playboy bunnies who had landed there after an in-flight emergency. The boys on the boat exchange a drum of fuel for the bunnies' services, but the chicks were in lala land, the sex was empty, and was punctuated by a body falling out of a casket in all its gory detail. Enough to make you throw up, the scene dragged for 20 minutes.
Upriver, on the other side of the Do Long Bridge, our boys are looking to bury one of their own after an attack leaves on of the crew dead, when they happen upon a wrecked dock belonging to an old French Plantation. Another 25 minutes of dinner conversation in French about the war ensue, followed by the seduction the good captain by the plantation's matriarch.
By the time they reach the headwaters of the river to confront the Colenel, I am fast asleep.
Years ago I learned to walk out of movies that suck (this is because I failed to walk out of "The Adjuster" and regretted the time wasted).
One day I sat down and saw a terrific movie, Drowning By Numbers. After about 15 minutes I thought, "you know, this looks kind of familiar..." but then I wasn't sure. Eventually I realised that I had walked out of this movie years before!So did the movie suck or not? Or maybe I just suffered brain damage in between...
I agree with half of what you say. Battlefield Earth on its own merits (or lack thereof) is not the worst movie ever. Considering the book it's based on makes it significantly worse than it is. Many, many people consider it an excellent science fiction book. The movie had expectations close to the Lord of the Rings movies, but we all know which movie/movies even came close to expectations.
Heroscape, it's like legos combined with anachronistic wargames.
I've never actually walked out half-way through a film, but I was extremely close in this one. (The only other one was 'Alien', but that was a reflection on my squeamishness, and not the quality of the movie!)
Ceterum censeo subscriptionem esse delendam.
If the only thing they got wrong was the ending, that was a book that never should have been printed, let alone made into a movie.
I haven't read any Stephen King in a long time and it looks like I haven't missed anything.
Dreamcatcher gets my vote as well as an Honorable Mention for "Best Cast in a Truly Rotten Stinker".
Pain is merely failure leaving the body
I got this movie called "Italian for Beginners" from Netflix, based on a recommendation.
2 26 77&trkid=73
http://www.netflix.com/MovieDisplay?movieid=600
It is I think Dutch. It looks like it was shot by a drunk teenager with a VHS camera. I cannot possibly express enough what a disappointment it was to rip open the red envelope and pop the disk in, only to see what I saw.
I have not lost faith in foreign films. But, much like the US after 9/11, I've begun to rethink my foreign policy.
Completely untrue. You need to prove your case. I proved mine. 6 pages of links. One guy on the net yelling his personal opinion does not make a case. I don't care what you claim. Prove your claim. Prove those facts are innaccurate.
I don't think it even approaches any other movie in sheer crappiness. The only way it's bearable is if you see the MST3K version.
I'm pretty tolerant, but I couldn't even finish this one it was so bad. No plot, bad acting, lame singing and dancing, totally pointless waste of celluloid
Sadly, all the plot was in the deleted scenes which weren't finished as they ran out of budget to complete the special effects shots. If you ever do decide to give it another go, watch the movie then watch the delete scenes - and it wil suddenly start to shape up as an OK fantasy flick.
Besides, watching it in a cinema with a bunch of DND geeks was excellent entertainment value, as people called out what skill checks the characters had just failed, or what spell had just been cast...
Ok, I'll just go off and nerd in the corner over here shall I?
Sara
Designer, Gamer, Macgrrl in an XP World
One simple example: The letter to the editor faked as a headline. Moore is anti-American and should go to France to be with his own kind. Or maybe Cuba since he is so far left he makes Castro look conservative.
Professional Politicians are not the solution, they ARE the problem.
Wrong... a changed typeface and font size is not a factual error. The facts are the same. Try again. You said the whole movie was lies. If the whole movie was lies, than you can point out all those lies. Moore's way "left", huh? So "left" he endorsed a Retired general that voted for Reagan in the Democratic Primaries, and is a gun owner. Oooops. The ones way out on the extremes are you neo-conservatives.
How did Cliffhanger somehow not make the bottom 100 list?
Sure, you can always rely on a truly appaulingly bad movie from Stalone. But Cliffhanger is in a class of its own, awful even by Stalone movie standards.
I don't know if there's some quantum lower limit on movie quality, but if there is, this movie defines it.
Titanic was a great movie! Really!
Forget all the silly Leonardo and Kate crap, though. That story line was bogus embellishment for a great, otherwise-true story that needed no embelishment. Ignore all of it (except perhaps Kate's tits, which _did_ add something to the movie).
Consider the rest of the movie: The historical facts, and they way they were presented, the special effects, the drama behind the real events (ignoring the silly fictional ones). It was a great movie.
I saw it twice. The first time, I was just blown away by the awesome spectacle I had seen. As I left the theater, overhearing conversations, I was astonished to realize that everyone else leaving the movie were intently discussing the Kate & Leo story, which I'd more or less blocked out as annoying distraction.
Sure, it could have been better. And shorter. All it would have taken to achieve both goals is to leave Leo and Kate on the cutting-room floor. Then it would have been one of the best movies I've ever seen.
Hud (1986) (aka Vilde, the Wild One) - without a doubt. It made me want to scratch my eyes out and poke holes in my eardrums. Elisabeth Granneman pissing in bed (Ewwwww!) was really the high (or low) -point in this incredably boring movie. Stay clear of this one and anything else starring or directed by Vibeke Løkkeberg or her husband Terje Kristiansen. For the love of God - Take my advice. Really... I mean it.
Thouse two are really bad movies, the first one about some karate kids, and the second one trying to be funny. But we can add to the list: California Suite (The most boring movie ever) The man with two brains Kill Bill 1 & 2 (please, can't be true they made that crap) "La balada del pistolero": The first part, El Mariachi was sort of good, but Banderas just screw it up ! (He was quite good with Almodovar, but just that, "Atame" for instance...). "Interview with the vampire"
Yeah, the movie was quite bad, but the book is a bit better, just a bit better, a pity the writter has no clue about the "technology" he was talking about, but for the year 79 is not that bad.
Congo is a terrible *terrible* film... *shudder* I find it too painful to talk about.
These are all pretty bad. There a lot of films I really couldn't get on with...
Deep Blue Sea - too cheesy by far.
Twister - first film I fell asleep during in the cinema. In fact, still the only one.
Congo - Tim Curry couldn't save it.
Nightmare on Elm Street 7 - it's hilarious for all the wrong reasons
From Dusk 'til Dawn - thought it was going to be normal Tarantino, then they all turned into vampires and we were horribly confused, amused and scared
The Matrix - sorry, this isn't a troll, but it was a bit cheesy and lame. it's good for the special effects, but if it hadn't had them I think it might have died. The premise is good, just the script itself and acting and everything was a bit too much for me
Warlock [imdb] - god awful "special" effects. Really really bad.
24 Hours in London [imdb] - it has the dad from "Two point four children" in it. As a gangster.
The Hot Chick [imdb] - if i have to tell you what's wrong with this movie, you need help
The Lost Boys [imdb] - it's got the blonde curly haired one from Bill and Ted in it, trying to look hard. And that's the least of it's worries. Poor dialog, awful awful acting.
I've never seen any movie posted on the IMDB list http://us.imdb.com/chart/bottom.
Having seen the trailer for "Dumb and Dumberer" (which made the list), I can say it looked like a good candidate for the Dumberest movie ever.
.signature not found
I firmly believe that movies should divided into 4 categories and only be rated against those in the same category. The categories are:
Examples:
Tiller's Rule: Never use a word in written form that you've only heard and never read. You will end up looking foolish.
Yeah, the movie was quite bad, but the book is a bit better
That can be said of all book-to-movie adaptation. : )
That is why when one of these is coming up and you have not yet read the book, it is better to wait until you have seen the movie before you read the book, that way to see the movie, you (hopefully) enjoy it, and then you read the book and its better.
If you do it the other way around, you read the book, you (again, hopefully) enjoy it, and then you see the movie and you are disapointed (or outraged, reactions vary) because it is inevitably less enjoyable than the book.
Heed my words fellow slashdotters: See the movie first, take a chance for double enjoyment.
Else you only set yourself up for inevitable disapointement.
You can't take the sky from me...
Well there is just no accounting for taste. Zardoz has always been one of my favorite movies.
Don't get me wrong, I love it and I try to get as many people to watch as possible, but it is BAD, bad bad bad, in a good way : )
See, it is honestly bad, they were trying to make something good, and failed miserably. So I applaud the effort, I enjoy the vision, I laugh at the result.
You can't take the sky from me...
In other words... you got nothin'...You claim the "whole movie is lies" and the best you got is a typo?...You're gonna have to come up with more than the same old right wing talking points at slashdot....I also know what the neo-conservative definition of "socialist" is. Anyone not on Bush donor list. Keep on spewing meaningless personal attacks based on a form of govenment that is extinct. It's quite funny.... You know what Lee Atwater (Reagan's version of Karl Rove) called neo-cons like you? "Extra-chromosome conservatives."
Thank you for taking the time to reply to my message.
I haven't had a chance to see any recent French or European films for the past ten years because the film distribution system forces them to have box office admission prices above my entertainment budget. I had hoped that the DVD revolution would allow all the great new French films to get distributed here at much less cost, but that doesn't look like it will happen. An unintended consequence of having DVD regions to restrict simultanous global distibution of Hollywood product is that region blocking on DVDs has made low-cost distribution of foreign films to North America impossible. Plus saturating the multiplex theatres with Hollywood blockbusters has destroyed the distribution and audience for small atmospheric French films outside of a few large cities.
Gaumont and the other major distributors seem to be completely clueless as to how to use DVDs to tap into the North American market for French films that has been dormant since the late 1970s. They should get together with the mail-order DVD distributors like NetFlix to introduce a whole new generation to the parallel universe that is French and European film.
It Came Without Warning: godawful science fiction flick about an alien hunter.
they both sucked spiderman is not a love story above an action story
http://www.npcgaming.com Dedicated Gaming Servers
1. Only the Strong: The imdb description includes the follwing: "...Only The Strong preaches a message that will no doubt bore anyone over 15." My little brother was 13 and he hated the movie, too. It's one of those movies that the brainless redneck types really enjoy... but the bad acting and terrbile filming/soundtrack. 2. Ladyhawke: Now, i'm prepared for flames on this so I'll preface my distaste with the following: I really liked this movie. I loved the concept, it had decent acting. My problem is the soundtrack! If you watch it now, you'll find some of the worst examples of 80's synth pop throughout the movie. When discussing "suspension of disbelief" the music just totally kills any hope for that happening!
> It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
IMDB link here
:0)
I love bad movies. I had to stop watching this one halfway through. Got it on a whim off of eBay, becuase the guy selling it said it was so bad he couln't watch it all the way through.
I guess he meant it.
Basic premise: guy likes to pass gas, girl thinks he's gross, and not much else happens.
$5 plus shipping if anyone wants it (I have to at least recoup my original cost.)
and of course Independence Day, this one basically is the worst. The funny thing a classic like Plan 9 from outer space is in my opinion quite good, it has a certain charme and definitely lots of soul in it. Id rather see the complete works of Ed Wood 3 times than once Independence Day or the typical Bruckheimer Bay idiocy.
I'm putting this one in in advance.
The book is already written like a crappy movie, so they'll just film it straight up.
Share and Enjoy!
Wow, I didn't think anyone else in the world saw that movie.
I actually saw it on TV, with no 3D effects, but all the 3D "moments." I was about twelve years old, and I thought it was terrible. My "favorite" moment was when the "key" was floating in midair, and you could very plainly see the wires holding it up -- I mean, they didn't even try.
Only later did I learn that it was a foreign film with a budget of six-fifty.
Either Highlander, Sleepless in Seattle, The Whole Ten Yards, or the Sixth Sense.
Trick or Treat - with Skippy as the teen hero (rube) who summons the devil by playing Fastway backwards.
I left the $1 theatre before it ended.
I'm just wating for the "pin the pasties on the mogul" version of Citizen Kane.
"Prepare for the worst - hope for the best."
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre.
Worst movie I've ever seen? Star Wars 1: The Phantom Menace. Of course, that's probably because I don't watch very many movies.
"They redundantly repeated themselves over and over again incessantly without end ad infinitum" -- ibid.
Never seen a 0% movie on rotten tomatoes before.
I have!
If memory serves me right, Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever for the longest time served up a 0% rating with 93 negative reviews and none positive . I know it's not now, but here's the "worst of 2002" list to prove it.
Geeks in Space: The Movie
I agree that Ghosts of Mars was total crap.
But the 13th Warrior was quite good after I worked out that it was a retelling of Beowulf. Then it made one hell of a lot more sense.
I know, I should have figured it out, but I'd not read Eaters of the Dead at that point, and it wasn't until I was reading that story that it hit me. After that, I went back, rewatched it, and was able to enjoy it because I knew WTF was going on.
So it was a poor movie by the metric of telling a story in and of itself, I grant you, but it was fairly well made and stuck to the plotline pretty good.
- Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set him on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
The movie was enjoyable in it's own way. It was intentionally made in a certain style, and basically focused on the propaganda type of thing. And for that, it is quite well made. It's cheesy, but it's supposed to be.
When you compare it to the book though, it just pales by comparison. I would have enjoyed Starship Troopers the movie a hell of a lot more if I'd never heard of Starship Troopers the book. It's one of Heinlein's great stories, and the movie simply doesn't come close.
- Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set him on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
No contest. (Well, maybe, "Manos: The Hands of Fate", but I haven't seen that. If it's worse than "The Creeping Terror", count me out, it must be truly brain-rottingly bad.)
Imagine a "creature" that looks like 500 pounds of carpet remnants with tennis balls on the ends of slinky springs for eyes.
Then imagine a space craft that looks like a piece of concrete drainage pipe.
Imagine that the "creature" moves so slowly that the only way it can consume its victims is that they just lie there as it oh-so-slowly galumphs over them.
Now, the crowning touch, the rotting fish head on top of this pile of putrescent garbage: Imagine that they lost the whole sound track, and lacking funds (or blackmail material) to get the actors back to dub some dialog, they brought in (so help me!) a guy whose regular job was narrating those "red asphalt" driver's ed films for high schools to narrate the whole movie in a deadly monotone: "And John told Mary that the monster had eaten the entire cheerleading squad, and Mary agreed that that was really terrible..." while the actors silently flapped their gums.
Not "so bad it's funny." Just bad. Boringly bad, in a completely un-interesting way.
King Cobra, starring Pat "Karate Kid" Morita, is easily the worst movie I've ever seen. From the bad plot to the bad acting, it reeks of badness.
That book is a 240 page spew of insults with no facts or evidence whatsoever. Moore's facts are never challenged at all. They call him names for 240 pages. *whiff* Try again. You still have yet to provide any evidence whatsoever.
1st.. Brazil...
Very Close 2nd.. Dungeons & Dragons
It still hurts..
Time travel is possible. We are quickly heading for 1984.
The top 10 worst movies i have ever seen in order are:
1.) Jersey Girl
2.) Contact
3.) Blue Chips
4.) The Mighty Ducks
5.) GI Jane
6.) Vanilla Sky
7.) Moulin Rouge
8.) King Arthur
9.) Garfield: The Movie
10.) Fear
Also anything with Penelope Cruz
Where do they find people like you? Maybe you should stick to something with more explosions and gunfire in it? Perhaps something from the John Woo collection.
The real Captain Avatar is a fictional character, so I suppose he doesn't mind if I impersonate him.
Try these:w ww.davekopel.com/Terror/Fiftysix-Deceits-i n-Fahrenheit-911.htm
http://slate.msn.com/id/2102723/
http://
but the bottom line is that you will not accept any truth that disagrees with your preconcieved notions. A major failing of liberals. You probably one of the under 30's that won't even vote in November.
Professional Politicians are not the solution, they ARE the problem.
It's name is: Night of the Day of the Dawn of the Son of the Bride of the Return of the Revenge of the Terror of the Attack of the Evil, Mutant, Alien, Flesh Eating, Hellbound, Zombified Living Dead Part 2: In Shocking 2-D
... but with a title like that, shit ...
Okay, so I haven't seen it
Global warming is neither science, nor politics. It is a religion.
Liberal : BROAD-MINDED; especially : not bound by authoritarianism, orthodoxy, or traditional forms... So by your own admission, you hate people that disagree with authoritarians. You believe in govenment by bullying thugs.... you ranted, "but the bottom line is that you will not accept any truth that disagrees with your preconcieved notions. A major failing of liberals". That would be projection on your part. Liberals analyze evidence and allow the facts to show the best course for the future. Conservatives refuse to consider change no matter what the evidence shows... My evidence? 4000 dead on 9/11 and a war started when there were no WoMD found, and people being tortured by US prison guards, and you conservatives haven't fired a single person from a single job. That's the most extreme example of rigid thinking in US Government history....
My age? I wish I was under 30. I wouldn't have so much gray hair. My voting in presidential elections goes back to Carter....Mike Moore has already answered both the Hitchens and Kopel charges in the initial link I gave with the 6 pages of responses....Did you really think you were posting "original" links by posting those two links? They've been on the net and answered for months.... The Kopel article even mentions in an update that Moore answered all his points and more.
*whiff* try again
Just because the girl with I take to the movie that night.
>Linux is not user-friendly.
It _is_ user-friendly. It is not ignorant-friendly and idiot-friendly.
Worst movie *I* have ever seen.
I'm sure there's worse, but this one just hurt.
Raptor
"Procrastination is great. It gives me a lot more time to do things that I'm never going to do."
I sniffed J.Lo's ass and got too touchy feely,
She let loose a bomb that was bigger than Gigli!
I kid, I kid!!! I joke with you!
I even like....I don't like Afleck....
If you can't say something nice, make sure you have something heavy to throw.
Without a doubt, hands down, including Plan 9 From Outer Space;
Book Of Swords starring Ho Sung Pak
Absolutely fucking *TERRRRRIBLE*, comically bad, so bad that the explosion that was this movie has embedded shards of useless gibberage firmly into my brain such as these;
(wild eyed loon with facial closeup)
Power...
(loaded pause)
Is a piece of cake
(slightly smaller pause)
That must be eaten
(wild eyed loon making X men insignia over downed heroic figure)
HAHAHAHHAHA! I BET YOU NEVER PREDICTED YOU WOULD BE TAKEN DOWN BY A MAN NAMED WEAPON-X!
(head swims)
Eugh...
'Nuff said.
The best movie that I've ever seen so far, is the Lord Of The Rings Trilogy (All 3 of 'em). Nothing tops that to date! The worst movie that I've ever seen so far, is Showgirls. What on earth were they thinking of when they made that movie? Also, the goriest yet touching movie I've ever seen so far, is Passion Of The Christ. Hats off to Mel Gibson!
No Lie, in black and white, probably made in the 30's, dubbed from the Spanish, with mummies, and other creatures and a Fu Manchu character and several other movies all rolled into one. I have it on VHS.
Awsome
This was some movie that wanted to be intelectual with these random talks on philisophical issues, but accomplished nothing. It would constantly start a topic and when it would start to get into it, topics would change. The animation was horrible, i jittered way too much, i was kinda gettting sick watching this movie. However from the reviews, you can see this movie is one of those movies you either love or hate. AND I HATED IT.
The Scorpion King.
'Nuff said.
Assasins. With "Antonio Bendejo" and "Slipn Sly Stallone".
I am Bennett Haselton! I am Bennett Haselton!
you're kidding right? LEOEG is by and large the second worst movie i have ever had the displeasure of seeing.
There are several award winning formulas for this. One, it fails to appeal to anyone who'd have actually heard of Quatermain, or Dorean Grey. It fails to appeal to people who want a mindless acion movie without 10 diffrent back stories. It throws Tom Sawyer in for no reason (i guess they wanted an American). Oh and it makes no sense. Some guy took a photo of the bridge of the nautalis and suddenly has stolen all of Nemo's science. Not to mention the laughable bit where the traitor shows off some of 'the invisible man's skin.' The only thing worth mentioning in that movie was Nemo's pimped out car and the fact that it wasn't the worst movie ever. This of course goes to Van Helsing which contained eveyr bad movie cliche imaginable. I am a worse person for being coerced into watching both.
The Neo-Bohemian Techno-Socialist
Roomates Review of Showgirls:
"That was the worst movie i ever gave 5 stars"
The Neo-Bohemian Techno-Socialist
Godsend was horrible. I have never so eager for a film to just be over as I was when watching this.
Free electronics!
The Tolkien Sarcasm Page give the best review ever of this movie, putting it down in the pit it so rightly deserves to be in.
You guys liked 'Evita'?
I sat down and after about a half hour I was going "It has to get better"...
after an hour I switched to "I've invested an hour in this, quitting now makes that sacrifice worthless!"
Democrats or Republicans. They are both taking us to the same place and they are not afraid of us anymore.
My frontal lobes revolted and overthrew my autonomic nervous system 5 minutes into the movie and I've been a brain dead, drooling idiot ever since. Even J Lo's butt wasn't enough to keep me sane.
The title alone is a work of art! Hollywood couldn't come up with something that good.
slightly off-topic, but Payback is a also a great movie.
Conspiracy Theory was pretty cool as well.
The Navy vs. the Night Monsters. It's one of those old "monsters on isolated island" movies. The ending, though... The people get to a radio. They call in an air strike. No more monsters. Problem solved.
You're a tool. Shrek is 90 minutes of lame pop-culture gags and poor fairy-tale satire packed into an over-expensive CGI animated film. Go read Terry Pratchett for a real laugh, and Toy Story for comedy/story with real resonance.
I will always sit through a movie just to get my moneys worth, no matter how bad it is. Magnolia was the exception to this - I stayed until 3/4 the way through the movie, by which time nearly everyone in the cinema had left already. And it was only half full to begin with.
I saw a snippet of it on TV one Sunday afternoon, marvelled at how bad it was, and found a book to read.